Hiya, if you've got this far, you're lucky. I'm always reluctant to let others see my work, especially fanfiction, but I've posted some stories up on my site that have seemed to go down well, so I figured I may as well attempt a gay fanfiction, as it's something I've wanted to do for a while. If you're after an N Sync story, well, stop reading now. If you, for some un-Godly reason, have a thing against Nick-friendly stories, stop reading now. My stories are always Nick friendly, and I feel that some perfectly good stories written for Nifty have been let down because people have a problem with Nick, and make him out to be a real bastard. AJ as well. And occasionally Brian. And Howie. Oh, and Kevin. ? So anyway, let's just say this story is N Sync free and BSB friendly. Thank you.
Disclaimer: Man, these things suck to write. Okay, here's the deal. Stop reading if you're under eighteen, or it's illegal to view such material in your area. Not that there will be any sex, but hey, some people are just plain prejudiced. This story is not meant to imply anything about The Backstreet Boys. As far as I know, they're not gay, for which I'm profoundly glad. My million to one chance of marrying Nick would be out the door if they were. I'm just a sick little girlie, who makes up stuff like this in my head. None of it's true. It's F-I-C-T-I-O-N, peeps. You'd do well to remember that.
Little White Lies
The day Kevin realised he was in love with Nick was a Monday. Monday the ninth of June 1997 to be precise. Nick was seventeen then, and had rapidly begun the descent from boyhood into manhood. He was going through his clumsy period, where he had grown too fast for his mind to handle, and as a result, couldn't be trusted with anything breakable, valuable or otherwise. If Kevin had at first been slightly scornful of Nick's Californian beach-bum good looks, he was now growing increasingly, and somewhat painfully aware of the youth's slender frame, sensuous lips, crystal blue eyes and silken, golden hair.
It didn't click with Kevin that he was falling in love with him, not at first. He put his excessive thinking of the boy down to jealousy. Kevin had every reason to be jealous of him. Here he was, the 'serious' one, described in interviews as the daddy of the band, while Nick was being inundated with European fans declaring their undying love for him. Yes, jealousy was the only reason Kevin could not get Nick out of his thoughts.
The truth hit him like a speeding bullet on that warm Monday in June. They were in England at the time, touring, and it was the morning of a show in London. AJ and Howie were shopping, as usual, while Brian, Kevin and Nick were playing basketball in the court set up backstage for them. Every time Nick jumped up to catch the ball, or score, Kevin's eyes travelled to Nick's tanned torso, which was making a break for freedom, thanks to the loose fitting t-shirt he was wearing. It still didn't hit him. He didn't even register he was doing it, not until afterwards when he needed some jacking-off material. No, it didn't hit him until, making a play for glory, he got in front of Nick and they both jumped up to get the ball. Somewhere along the line, Kevin fell back, and, managing to turn himself around, plummeted both him and Nick to the floor. Nick let out a groan of pain, as Kevin lay on top of him, unsure as to what had just happened. Somewhere in the distance he could hear Brian laughing, but he wasn't listening. He was only aware of the beautiful kid that he was currently extremely intimate with.
The next thing he knew, Nick had pushed him off, and stood up shakily. The soft-focus experience Kevin had just been in ended, as he realised Nick had blood coming from his hands, and, realising that didn't make any sense, actually had it coming from the back of his head where he had banged it on the hard concrete.
"Oh shit." Brian stopped laughing as he saw the graze. Kevin looked on, horrified; as Nick proceeded to launch into the most impressive faint either of them were ever likely to see.
It was that defining moment Kevin realised. That moment would always stay with him, even when he was at his lowest. Especially when he was at his lowest. He had never fallen so quickly, so suddenly, for anyone, especially not one so young, and so damn innocent. Nick, for all his playfulness and chaotic nature was still a child at heart. And that was one of the things Kevin loved about him. Hearing him go on about his new Nintendo game, or screwing up his nose when his mum kissed him goodbye. Little stuff like that redefined Kevin's love for him every time.
Realising he was in love with Nick was not an introduction to his own sexuality. Kevin had known he was gay for quite some time. His first experience had been when he was fifteen, with a considerably older man. Since then, his partners had been few and far between, but Kevin was in no way, shape or form a virgin. He enjoyed the sex; it was one of the best parts about being gay. But after falling for Nick, he lost all sexual appetite. Kevin realised there was no point in having sex if it wasn't with the person you really, truly loved. It sounded sappy, but it was true. He couldn't even think about anyone else in a sexual context when Nick was so prominently in his affections.
"Something's eating you, cuz." Brian stated simply on the tour bus a couple of weeks later. Kevin turned to him, shocked that someone would dare to enter his 'thinking time', as he liked to think of the long journeys on the tour bus.
"How would you know?" Kevin asked. "Can you read my thoughts?"
"No, but I can read your face. And right now, it's screaming 'something's eating my owner.'"
"Freak." Kevin laughed at his cousin's weird sense of humour.
"But I'm right, aren't I?"
"Ok, maybe I'm a little bummed at being so far away from home in a country where people don't even speak English." Kevin spoke in reference to Germany, the country they were currently doing some heavy-duty promotion in. "Is that allowed?"
"Of course it is. The girls don't even shave their arm-pits here." Brian spoke in all seriousness. Kevin laughed louder. Brian never failed to put a smile on his face.
"But seriously, cuz, we all feel down from time to time. Just cos you're the oldest, doesn't mean you're not allowed to talk about it. If you do ever need to."
"I don't." Kevin stopped him short. In the back of the bus he could hear Nick's sweet laugh filling the air, while AJ did an inane impression of some kids programme. "Bri, I'm fine. Like I said, I'm just feeling homesick."
"Fine." Brian stood up, his feelings hurt. "Go ahead and be a prick." He stormed off, to get as far away from Kevin as the small bus would allow. Kevin slumped down in his seat, and slipped his Walkman over his ears. He had to do something about this. Nick wasn't gay, Kevin was fairly certain. And even if he was, he would never be interested in someone like Kevin. Mr Responsibility. Nope, there was only one thing for it. He would have to stop loving Nick. He laughed to himself. That could have been funny, if it wasn't so blatantly sad. Trying to stop loving Nick, it would have the same effect as chopping off his arm.
Well, what do ya think? Okay, I know nothing actually really happened, but this is just setting the basis for the rest of the story. I promise, it will get very interesting, very soon.