Mile High

Mile High Part 9

"Get away from me, you bastard!" Steve rounded on Mike in the dark parking lot. "What about our plans for spring break this year? And you were going to be my `Best Man' this summer! What about all those plans you said you were making for the bachelor party? Was all that a lie too?" Steve shrugged Mike's arm off and stalked toward his truck. "When were you going to tell me the truth?"

"I wasn't lying!" Mike's voice was urgent, pleading. "I just couldn't tell you the truth! I was afraid of how you'd react!" He could see the difference, did Steve?

"Just get the fuck away from me, liar." Steve tried to pull his truck door off its hinges. "I don't give a fuck if you're gay or whatever you say you are." Steve's heightened emotions were a complete jumble. Foremost though was a feeling of betrayal; he thought they knew everything about each other. "I thought we were friends! I didn't hold anything back from you!" Steve's voice cracked." Or was all this just another joke to you? Ah, fuck you and the horse you rode in on! I don't know you any more!"

"This isn't a joke! Damn it! I...." Mike watched in defeat as Steve squealed his tires in his effort to get away.

"I thought Steve was OK with us?" Kel watch the exchange with a feeling of dread, their four to three slim victory over the Board already forgotten. "What's wrong with him?"

"I don't know," Chris replied. "He sure didn't act this way when he found out about us!"

"What's wrong?" Mr. Goldman watched from behind the two boyfriends. "Mike told me all his friends and family knew already! Otherwise, I would have never let him do it!" He slowly shook his head. The kid would make a great lawyer.

"There's no fool like an old fool!" He saw Mike jump to his own green truck with the oversized mud tires. "Go get him! Don't let him go, I want to talk to him!" he directed to Kel, Chris, and their small circle of friends.

"Michael! I want to talk to you!" His dad stepped out of the meeting room, looking for his son, anguish creasing his features. "Mike? I Knew!"

Mike turned to the sound of his father's voice. His face had become an unreadable mask to Chris as they approached the truck. Mike turned back and quickly pulled himself up into his overly tall vehicle.

"Stop! Mike! Lets talk about this!" Chris jumped in front of the truck to block it in that direction as Kel and the others surrounded it. "Your dad wants to talk! We can help you work something out!"

"Get the fuck away from me!" Mike's yell was muffled by the windshield. "Let me go!"

Chris heard the truck's engine suddenly rev, blocking out any other words. He leapt out of the way as Mike suddenly released the clutch and his truck lurched forward, easily bouncing over the curb onto the street.

The small group watched in dismay at the receding taillights, as they swerved from side to side, the driver finally bringing the truck back under control.

"...Of course I knew," Mike's dad was explaining to Mr. Goldman. "Christ, I raised him for the last seventeen years. I knew there was something like this going on." He nodded in Chris's direction as he proceeded to his `black and white', glad that Chris wasn't hurt. "I've got to stop him before he does anything else stupid!"

"Listen, everybody!" Mr. Goldman let his commanding voice take control of the boys and girls that surrounded him. "Joel, Sharon,....," he was glad he was good with names, "...take Jenny and go find Steven. Call me as soon as you do." He looked at Jenny's face, she'd been sobbing. "Don't worry! He thinks his most trusted friend has been lying to him and he's hurt. He hasn't thought it through from Michael's point of view. Just go find him." He turned back to the rest, "Are any of you close enough friends to know where Michael may go?"

Kel and the others shook their heads 'no'. Mike was popular at school much like any other clown but, he had to admit to himself, he doubted anyone actually knew Mike as a true friend, with the exception of Steve, of course. Mike and his jokes had always just been `there'. He'd had no idea who the true person really was. No one did.

He had to admit he'd been just as shocked as everybody else that evening when Mike `came out' during the Board meeting. He guiltily dropped his head. His first reaction was to think it was just another Mike O'Rourke style stunt. He hoped Mike's dad would be able to find him, 'cause none of them knew where to even start to look if he wasn't at home.

"You mean nobody...." Mr. Goldman quickly erased the condemnation in his voice. "OK, a couple of you watch his house. Let me know if he's home and safe." He glanced back at the two who'd brought him to this Godforsaken town in the first place. "Kelvin, Christopher, we'll wait for any word at James's. I don't know if your presence would be welcome at this time, until I can get a handle on the dynamics at work here."

Kel and Chris just looked at Mr. Goldman. They had no idea what the hell he was talking about. Their friends were in trouble, in pain, and he says they aren't wanted? Chris stifled the first six 'fuck you's that came to his mind and grudgingly allowed himself to continue trusting the old man for the time being.

Officer O'Rourke grimaced as he looked down the road. Nothing! His son had gotten too much of a head start. It would take his son at least eight hours to reach the nearest state line if that was his goal. He realized he might need help in locating him, but didn't want to pull other agencies into what was really a family matter. Besides, what if Mike didn't stop when asked to?

He was also familiar with what was now called `suicide by cop'. His son was all too familiar with police procedures and tactics, he'd even ridden along with his dad a few times. (Completely against the rules, but it gave the two of them more time together.) He had no illusions that his son could force another cop to shoot him, even if he was unarmed, if that was his goal.

If Mike didn't come home on his own, he could only hope maybe he would try to see Philip, but he lived outside of Houston. He'd have to get a hold of Philip's mother if he couldn't find his son. He resigned himself, he needed help. His hand shook as he lifted the microphone and switched to statewide car-to-car.

Mike slowly pulled next to the towering pump-jack as it slowly rocked back and forth on its pivot, drawing oil relentlessly to the surface. The hum of the motor driving the assembly was the only sound in the night. He'd been there many times before. It was one of the few places in the Texaco field he was safe; most of the others were behind locked gates and yellow H2S warning signs.

He was out there to be alone, but now he knew he was more alone than ever before. In the past he found comfort in the deep swath of stars overhead and the spires of new oil wells lit up far in the distance. There was something `unchanging' about this place where he was the only living soul around, except for the coyotes and jackrabbits, of course, but they were just part of the landscape as unchanged as the rest. He felt as empty as his surroundings.

There was no comfort in those distant lights this time; only the feeling of being alone permeated everything. He didn't cry, only little kids did that in his world, but he had no one to joke with either. No one to play practical jokes on, no team mates, that was over forever. He did the only thing he could think of at the moment and put the half gallon bottle of cheap bourbon to his lips and took a deep swallow. Soon his loneliness and all other feelings would be pushed away where they belonged. _________________________________________________________________________________________

Kelvin looked around the locker room that Friday afternoon. Neither he nor Chris had their heart in practice that afternoon. Michael and Steven weren't there, hadn't shown up for school at all. He had hoped, after Mr. Goldman left the previous night to talk to Steve, that everything would be OK. But if they knew where Steve was, they still had no idea where Mike was or even if he was still alive.

Kel shuddered at that thought. He couldn't stand to think of losing a friend before he ever got a chance to actually know Mike as a friend. Another wave of guilt washed over him. He should have tried harder to break through all those walls, he only now realized, Mike had built around himself. Mike was always the happy one. Until last night, no one had ever seen anything else.

When the group talked that morning about Michael, they all suddenly realized that he had never seemed upset about anything and, even at Brian's funeral, no one had ever seen him cry, they had just taken his attitude for granted.

It was a very subdued group that left the lockers for their cars that afternoon. Kel and Chris saw the black Lincoln they recognized as Mr. Goldman's rental, sitting in the lot next to Kel's Jeep, and picked up their pace. Steve was sitting next to the old man.

"Did you find him?" Chris asked as he approached the open door cautiously. He was glad to see the old man, but didn't know how Steve would be.

"He's in jail." Mr. Goldman let his news settle in for a moment. "He was found by a truck driver making his rounds in the oil fields this morning. He was blind drunk. He may have tried to resist arrest, but don't worry, his father is with him!"

"Have you gone to see him?" Kel was relieved Mike was alive, but didn't want to think about him screwing his life up. "How is he? Can his dad get him out?"

"We tried!" Steve spoke up, the difficulty of the situation and his reaction to it clear on his face. "He,...he wouldn't see me, doesn't want to see anyone!" Steve refused to let his eyes meet anything. "I was just surprised last night. Angry.... I didn't mean what I said, but he won't listen!"

He quickly wiped his hand across his face. "I don't know if I can face him again. His dad...."

"Anyway, we're all going to try again!" Mr. Goldman's look burned through Kel, Chris, and the other team members who had gathered around his car. "All of us! He might be able to ignore one or two, but not all of you. If you really care, that is?"

Kel and the others watched the police video in horror and fascination. Mike's dad had pulled all of them into a small room to watch it. Of course, Trooper O'Rourke was familiar with the occasional get together his son had with the others, but found it hard to believe none of them knew about the solo drinking his son had admitted to. They'd all just stood there redfaced as each had to admit they had no idea that Mike did that when he wasn't with them. That Mike was seldom with them, except at school, was no comfort.

It was also obvious to them that Mike's dad didn't believe it for a second. So they'd all watched the video as Mike tried to advance on the officer who'd pulled up behind him, only to be dropped by a combination of pepper spray and a `Taser' gun that pumped fifty thousand volts through the small darts it had projected into his body.

"I just wanted you to see that!" Mike's dad looked at the white faces in the room. "He doesn't want to see his `friends'." His words dripped with sarcasm. "But if you want to try to get through to him, go ahead. He won't talk to me either." He stopped the video tape and led the group out of the room. The video was going to stay with him forever. All the State Trooper saw over and over in his mind was the surprised look on his son's face when he'd realized the small rural sheriff officer had nonlethal resources he didn't know about.

Kelvin was shocked when he, Steve, and Chris were led back to the `drunk tank'. They were the last to try. The others, having failed, were sitting back in the lobby now. He had hoped they would all be allowed to see Mike at the same time, but there wasn't room.

"Mike!" He turned to the deputy, "Please, can we go in?"

Kel was brought up short for a moment as they were let into the cell. Mike lay face down on one of the benches, wearing a pair of orange shorts. The deputies had taken anything else that could be used as a noose away from him. That was common procedure for irrational teenagers, when the police couldn't read their intentions.

"Mike! Com'on, we need to talk to you!" Kel watched as Mike turned his head back to the corner. "We can help you. Don't shut us out like I almost did."

"Go away!" Mike closed his eyes, willing the others gone. He was so ashamed letting the others see him like this. The Taser used on him had caused his bladder and bowels to release and the shower afterwards did nothing to wash away that memory. "I don't need your help! I don't need you! Get the fuck away from me!"

"No!" Kel looked at Chris, then Steve, and shrugged his shoulders. They had all weekend. Well, Chris did have work, but that was hours away. "We're not going anywhere until you talk to us!"

The room settled into an uncomfortable and stubborn silence. Each side was unable or unwilling to give in to the other. Finally Kel had enough. This was getting them nowhere.

"Mike," he began softly this time, "I thought what you did last night was the bravest thing I ever saw." He took a deep breath. "I was forced out in the open and beaten for it. Chris wanted to stay hidden but everybody guessed because he hung around me." He looked at his love who just nodded in return. "But you just came out and said it in front of everybody. I don't know why you did it, but that took guts."

He took another deep breath. He'd gotten no response yet. "At least I thought it took guts. Now I'm not so sure." That last statement got a slight move. At least Mike was now looking at them. "All I see now is you trying to hide from everybody, everything." Anger flared in the look they got from Mike. "All I see is a coward trying to run away!"

"Coward?" Mike's mind snapped. "Fuck you! You don't know me! You've got your friends, your family, you've got somebody who lov...." Mike stopped suddenly. The constriction in his throat wouldn't let him continue. He turned away from the others as he felt the wet streaks on his cheeks and tried to bring himself back under control. He couldn't let them see him cry! He can't cry! It's not allowed!

Kel and the others quickly crossed to the other bench. "Mike, that's not true! We're here, your dad's here, and your mom's on the way. We'll be here for you if you'll let us. Let it go! It's OK! We won't tell anyone!"

Mike lost his private battle within himself and buried his face in his arms as he sobbed out the tears. It was OK to cry, his friends couldn't see him do it, he had his face hidden.

Kel motioned to Chris and they both stood and quietly left to wait in the lobby. Steve was the one who needed to stay, needed to clear the air with his best friend. They hoped that, given time, the two of them would realize that Mike could still be somebody's `best man', that their plans as friends were unchanged.

Mr. Goldman casually leaned back against the wall where he'd been listening. Kelvin had done very well. Sure he'd taken advice on how to do it, but in the end he had been on his own and done it himself. "Good job, kid."

Chris quietly placed the mop and bucket back in the closet and took another glance at the tile floor in the terminal building, making sure it would pass his employer's inspection. It was a boring night, there was no arriving traffic at the field for him to handle. Boredom could be a good thing sometimes. He'd had enough excitement to last him for a lifetime.

He let the calm cool air flow through his being when he stepped out onto the bare concrete ramp. The wildlife that inhabited the airport at night fascinated him as various birds and animals skittered through the dim lights cast around the area. He instinctively ducked when another owl screeched its call overhead. He envied the simple cares the other living beings that shared this world had. He sighed. They didn't care who was fucking who or who was in love with who. They just set out to find their next meal. Their needs were so simple. Why couldn't his world be like that?

He suddenly imagined himself a giant owl homing in on Julie Stamford and her dad, legs out and talons flexing. He laughed to himself as his imaginary image peeled away. `Too tough and stringy!' He didn't want anything to do with those two, even as an imaginary meal. Oh well, he had to get ready for his next set of security rounds, turning the various keys in the clock he was given.

"Chris! Want some company?" Kel yelled out, finally getting Chris's attention. "Mike says 'hi'! And 'thanks'!"

"What for?" Chris punched the button to open the gate to the line shack. "I didn't do anything."

"Well, you were there, and he's home now." Kel hugged his love to him and stepped back. "He's OK."

"OK for now." Chris was being overly gloomy. "What about later?" Even he knew a first step when he saw one.

"Later?" Kel echoed the question. "I guess that's up to Mike. They are willing to let him try to fix things here, but if it's too much for him, then I guess he'll go to Fort Worth.

"Fort Worth?" Chris was confused. What was in Fort Worth that would make Mike want to move there? He liked Mike, he'd make a good friend, had been a good friend.

"Yeah, Fort Worth. The old man offered to take him in..." Kel also hated the idea of a friend he was just getting to know moving away, "...put him through some kind of rehab if necessary. He made some comment about helping a future lawyer, whatever that means. So, what do you do here at night?"

"I'm a part time janitor..." Chris puffed out his chest and thumped it dramatically, "...part time security guard, and sometimes I even get to see an airplane!" He smiled then, "But usually I sketch or catch up on my studying."

"You? Study?" Kelvin gave Chris an unbelieving stare. "Yeah, right! I'll believe that when I see it!"

"No, really, I...." Chris started, then saw the expression on his boyfriend's face. "OK, asshole! Be careful or I'll mop the ladies' room with your head!"

"Oooo, I'm so scared!" Kel quickly threw a punch at Chris's arm and sped off into the dark. "Yah gotta see me to catch me!"

Chris glanced at his watch. He didn't have to do his rounds for another fifteen to twenty minutes. Plenty of time to run the poor fool down! He didn't know what he'd do when he caught him, but was sure it would be evil!

Chris smiled at his very disgruntled and wet boyfriend as he turned the last key on his round of the airport. The setup couldn't have been better! Kelvin had run around the corner of the building, screaming and laughing his head off, right where he'd been waiting! The look on his face afterwards had been classic!

"Go ahead and laugh!" Kel grumbled, shivering. "You think you're so smart. You didn't see me with a bucket of water!"

"Hey, you went for the hose first." Chris did laugh, remembering that brief duel. "It's not my fault you can't hit anything. You started it!"

"Yeah, well you'd have gone for the hose too..." Kel had to laugh. He had run right into it, "...if you were being chased by some horny dog, like I was." He shivered again. "Can we get back now? I need my jacket. I'm freezing my balls off."

Chris wheeled the tug around and headed back to the terminal. "Oooo, can't have that. You might need them later! Then again, maybe not!"

"Fuck you!" Kel snorted through his nose, "I like my balls right where they are. And so do you!"

"Yeah,..." Chris grimaced for effect, "...but I'd like it better if you didn't blow your snot all over the tug while I'm trying to drive it!"

"OK, I promi...." Kel lost what little composure he had left and was relieved when Chris stopped the vehicle before he fell out of it. "Did I..." his body convulsed with another fit of laughter, "...ever tell you why ..." giggle "...I love you?"

"No. Why?" Chris asked cautiously, ready for the comeback he was sure was coming.

"It's all the beautiful things you say to me!" Kel felt himself curl into a ball as Chris pushed him out of the low slung tug. He finally got himself back under control, having to breathe had a lot to do with it, and looked up at the bemused face looking back.

"Are you done now?" Chris was overjoyed to see Kelvin, the old Kelvin, back. "I thought you were cold?"

Kel crawled back into the tug and they proceeded quickly to Kel's Jeep.

The sudden flashing of the runway approach lights caught Chris's attention. "Hey Kel, I've got somebody coming in! I'll leave the gate open. See you in a minute!"

"... Two four Mike inbound for the active," the pilot's calm voice came through loudly over the radio as Chris reached it. He quickly grabbed the mic.

"Two four Mike..." he began, a little out of breath "...No traffic, winds calm, currently using runway one four!" He remembered to inhale. He wasn't air traffic control, he was just giving local information to the pilot, but it still excited him to do it!

"Two four Mike received." The mirth was obvious in the voice on the radio. "Are you approach control tonight?" It was obvious the pilot wanted to tease the youthful voice he heard.

"Ah, no." Chris flushed, glad that Kel wasn't there to see him, "But I will say `Clear to land' if you want me to"

"I think we've got it!" The voice said as Chris watched the small sleek jet cross just above the lights at the end of the runway. It was a Falcon ten! He couldn't help but get excited again. He'd never seen one up close before. He quickly pulled the line service guide out of the desk and turned to the appropriate page. He had no idea how to put fuel in one. Was it single point or over the wing? Oh God, he didn't want to look like an idiot in front of these guys!

Satisfied that he wouldn't embarrass himself, he proceeded out with the lit batons in his hands, waiting for the jet to taxi to the ramp. He caught sight of Kel out of the corner of his eye and gave him a quick 'thumbs up' as he saw his boyfriend disappear into the line shack.

Chris pulled the fuel truck back into its spot and finished writing up the ticket. He glanced back at the pilots as they secured the door to the jet. He felt his stomach tighten uncomfortably; they'd seemed friendly enough, in fact one of them was too friendly. He swore the man was trying to come on to him.

He shrugged his shoulders and stepped out to get their signature. He was reading too much into the stares one of them was giving him. It didn't help that he could see Kel in the window of the line shack grinning from ear to ear as he slowly approached the two men.

"John! Leave the boy some clothes on!" Mr. Goldman stepped out on the ramp from the terminal where he'd entered minutes before. "He's too young for you, anyway!"

"See, I told you," the older of the two nudged his co-pilot, laughing. "Cradle robber!" He winked at Chris. "Besides, I don't think the kid would want to wake up to your dead body after you tried to keep up with him."

"Hey, I am not that old!" The younger of the two replied indignantly. "I take it this is the same Christopher you told us about, boss?" he directed at Mr. Goldman.

"Yes it is!" the old man redirected his focus. "Christopher, would you please get `laughing boy' and meet me inside for a moment. As soon as you're done out here, that is."

Chris glanced to where The old man had indicated. Kelvin was half out the shack door doubled over, where he'd obviously heard the whole exchange.

"You really need to get looser pants!" Kel was still ribbing Chris as they entered. "That guy couldn't take his eyes off your ass, especially when you bent over the wing and wiggled it!"

"I did not `wiggle' my butt at anyone!" Chris was indignant. "How else was I going to get fuel in the dammed thing!"

"Kelvin! Stop teasing him!" Mr. Goldman gruffly said. He hoped James wouldn't mind his acting like a father every now and then, but then the atmosphere between these two was infectious and he couldn't help himself. "I don't think Christopher is the only one who needs looser pants!" He laughed to himself as Kel turned red and looked over his shoulder briefly, then looked to his front and saw the spot on his, now dry, jeans where he'd `leaked' through his boxers.

"N, No. We had a water fight!" Kel tried to dissemble quickly, but could tell no one was buying. "It, it's not what you think."

"Like hell it isn't," Chris growled, smiling, then looked at the old man. "What did you want to talk to us about?"

"OK. Now listen to me." Mr. Goldman still smiled but it was time to move to the serious subjects he wanted to cover. "First, we won against the Board and I don't see them doing much more, especially with those multiple lawsuits we threatened them with. I think they're now fully aware that they have to provide a safe learning environment for all their students, not just the ones they like." He took a deep breath. "But remember, that only applies in school. This is still a small town. I don't know what else you might face outside of class, so be careful, and call me if you need to."

"The second thing I need to tell you is more difficult." The old man looked directly at the two young ones. "Michael is going with me this morning. Steven is bringing him here."

"But I thought?" Kel was feeling betrayed himself. Mike couldn't leave now! "What about everything I said about his running away? I thought we were going to.... I don't know. Why?"

"Kelvin! Listen to me! He's not running away this time. He has you to thank for that." Mr. Goldman hoped he could make them understand. "He's running to his future, to the help he needs. He has a lot of issues, besides being gay, that he needs to work out. Especially if he still wants to be a State Trooper like his dad. His record is clean. I'm going to make sure it stays that way!"

"But we'll never see him again!" Kel surprised himself by being close to tears. "He and Steve were supposed to graduate this summer!"

"He still will." Mr. Goldman sympathized with the efforts Kel had made, but the move was for the best. "He'll be back. He won't forget you or anybody here. In fact, you need to visit when you can, it would do you some good to get away from here, and it's not like we're going to keep him a prisoner." He regretted destroying the mood, but at the same time he was glad they were there. They were the only two Mike hadn't been able to get a hold of on the phone. "Ah, they're here."

Mike's face lit up when he entered the building, dragging a large duffel. "God, I'm glad you're here. I thought I wouldn't be able see you before I left."

"Don't worry..." Kel and Chris almost leapt over the counter they were behind, "...you can't get rid of us that easy. We'll be out to visit!"

"Yeah!" Chris continued, "Mr. Goldman has offered to take in a few more strays, For a few days anyway."

"Where is Steven?" Mr. Goldman asked.

"He's getting his bag and locking up his `baby'." Mike smiled for the first time in a while. "I finally convinced him to come along on the trip there. If the invitation is still open, that is? He has to be back Sunday night."

"Of course the invitation is still open!" Mr. Goldman sighed in relief. "You're sure he won't mind spending a night with a couple of old queers?"

"I think that's why we weren't here sooner." Mike was being Mike again. "Personally, I think he was looking for a set of cast iron jockey shorts, before his mom and Jenny kicked him out of the house!"

"I was not!" Steve wandered in, looking around nervously. "I just don't.... Look! I've never flown before! That's all. Happy?"

Kel put his arm around his nervous team captain on this bittersweet night and led him out with the others. He couldn't help but put in a word of wisdom. "Just remember," he said, "there is no such thing as a forced landing!" He smiled at the horror that slowly spread over Steve's face. "Take it from a pilot. All airplanes will eventually hit the ground, you don't have to force them!"

He ducked away guiltily as the old man swatted the back of his head. "Kelvin! that's enough! Now say goodbye!"

Kel quickly moved to join the embrace Chris was giving Mike.

"Let us know as soon as you're OK for us to visit!" Chris said. "We'll see you later."

"Don't worry about me. You be careful out here." Mike smiled back at the two of them. "Even Sharon's out for your asses this time!"

"Why?" both asked in unison. "What has happened now?"

"You forgot to tell her about me and the jail!" Mike started up the steps after Steve. "She's really pissed she wasn't asked to be there! Anyway, she's your problem now, not mine!"

Chris moved in and helped the younger pilot secure the door. He had to smile through what he was feeling when he heard John grumble about who the real cradle robber was. Mr. Goldman was saying something about it being a shame one of them wasn't named Louie or Rick and them having a wonderful friendship. That was way over his head. He had no idea what the old man was referring to.

He let the thought go as he stepped away from the jet. What did someone named Rick and Louie have to do with saying goodbye at an airport?

Kel and Chris wrapped their arms around each other as they watched the jet's strobe lights finally wink out of sight and peace settle over the field. "Well, it looks like it's just you and me." Chris pulled Kel tighter and melted into the kiss they exchanged.

End Part 9

I would like to thank Ed for his kind editorial assistance with this series.

I apologize if I haven't answered your E-mail yet. I am working through them. Your response has been terrific!