The usual copyrights exist on this as well as all of my works. This story involves contact between young males. If this type of story is not what you're accustomed too, fit for your liking, or for any reason forbidden where you live, please do not read any further. I also apologize for any vulgar and offensive language that may be presented. This is the way that I depict my characters and I will write them accordingly. On the other hand, if none of the above applies to you then enjoy this and many of my other works of fiction.
Chapter 5
I awoke earlier than Eryck and Toney and was still somewhat surprised that Max never came home last night. I have to admit that he was acting really weird towards me and it was starting to hurt.
I really had a lot to tell him about Brandon and what he thought I should do. Knowing him, he would probably say that I should just move on and stop this silly love triangle or whatever it was I had with Brandon, Terrance and Q.
I tiptoed out my room, trying hard to not wake Eryck and Toney as I walked out into the hall. I walked downstairs through the lobby to check my mailbox when I ran into Mehete.
"Morning Jayse" Mehete said to me softly.
"Morning Mehete" I said walking past him as I checked my mail.
I couldn't help but notice the smile on his face as he read a letter softly to himself.
"Awww" Mehete said to himself as he clutched the letter to his chest.
I got my mail and slowly started exiting towards my dorm room, as Mehete started following me.
"Hey Jayse can I ask you a question?" Mehete asked walking up to me, as we walked side by side.
"Go ahead" I said.
"Um well I don't know if I should be asking you this, but please don't take it the wrong way" Mehete tried to say as I contemplated on what he was going to ask.
"What is it?" I asked.
"Are you..." Mehete said searching for the word to say, "gay?"
"Yea" I said proudly for the first time to anyone.
"Really?" Mehete asked excitedly, "because I really don't have any friends and I was wondering if I could start hanging with you?"
"Um..." I said searching for the words to say as I stopped. I looked at Mehete's face as he looked disappointed.
"It's cool if you don't want to be" Mehete said, "I'll understand."
"No" I said, "I'm sorry it's fine Mehete."
"Really?" Mehete exclaimed, "cool!"
We exchanged numbers and went back into our dorm rooms as I saw Eryck and Toney slowly rise.
"Where are you coming from mister?" Toney asked rubbing his eyes.
"I just went down to get my mail" I said walking towards my desk, "has Max came yet?"
"No" Eryck said folding up my quilt he slept on.
"Hmmm" I said to myself as I looked over at Eryck as he shook his head.
"Max has been MIA for the past few days" Toney stated, "whatever he and Rich got going on must be real important."
Just as Toney said that Max walked in the door as he looked around the room at all of us.
"Morning" Max said looking awkward.
"Morning" Toney said smiling as Eryck said a somber good morning.
"Where have you been lately?" I asked intrigued.
"Out with my man" Max stated as he walked over to his closet and started undressing, "I didn't know I couldn't do that!"
Toney, Eryck and I looked at each other awkwardly after Max said that.
"I don't think that anyone was stating that it was a bad thing" Eryck said defending me, "he was just asking a question."
"Well I was just letting you know" Max said with his back to us.
"Anyway" Eryck said getting up, "Jayse call me I have to go. See you guys later."
"What was that all about?" Toney asked confused as I shrugged my shoulders.
"So what's up?" Toney asked Max as he sat down on my bed, "what's new in your life?"
"Who me?" Max asked turning around to face Toney.
"Yeah you" Toney laughed, "the rest of us spilled all night about our boyfriend problems and even called you but you never showed up."
"I texted and said that I was going to be staying at Rich's" Max stated folding his clothes.
"We never got anything" Toney stated, "did you Jayse?"
"No I never got anything" I stated as I saw that I received a text from Terrance saying `good morning.'
"I'm sorry you didn't get it Toney but I sent it" Max said annoyed.
"What's wrong?" Toney asked as I texted Terrance back.
"Nothing is wrong" Max said as he grabbed a towel, "I'm going to go take a shower."
"Wow just like that" Toney said after Max closed the door, "well whatever his problem is, good luck! I have my own problems and if he doesn't want to talk he doesn't have to. Call me!"
I watched as Toney left my room as I texted Terrance back. I felt so happy all of a sudden texting him. Maybe because I knew that I was single again or maybe it was because I never really gave him all of my attention.
Right when I was about to respond to his text, he called me.
"Hello" I said trying to contain my excitement.
"Hi Jayse" Terrance said excitedly.
"Hi" I said back trying to match his tone.
"I uh," Terrance said stammering, "I really missed hearing your voice. It's good to hear from you."
"Thanks same to you."
"How's everything going for you over there?"
"It's rough but it's only the first year so you know?"
"Yea I remember." "You uh, got my gifts?"
"Yes I did, thank you."
"You're welcome Jayse, anything for you!"
I blushed as he said that and right when Max was walking back into the room.
"Terrance can I call you right back?"
"Sure" Terrance said as I said my goodbye and hung up.
"Hey are you ok?" I asked Max.
"I'm fine Jayse" Max said still sounding annoyed.
"I'm just asking Max" I said getting frustrated, "I'm getting worried about you, so are Toney and Eryck."
"I have told you guys that I am fine" Max stated as he started to get dressed.
"Then why are you acting so distant towards us?" I asked.
"No one is acting distant Jayse" Max stated as he slammed his chest drawer.
"Yes you are" I stated.
"Look Jayse I think that it's time we talked" Max said as he grabbed a shirt.
"Talk about what?" I asked confused.
"I uh, I may be moving out soon" Max said calmly.
"Moving out?" I asked shocked, "Max we just got here last week."
"I know, I know, "Max said but I think, sorry Rich and I think that it would be best if we gave the living together thing a try" Max stated.
"Are you really serious Max?" I asked thinking this all was a joke.
"Jayse I'm very serious" Max said sitting down on his bed, "I mean if you think about it, we're in college and it's time to start thinking about growing up and doing things."
"Max we just got here" I said walking over to sit next to him, "I mean be real with me? Is it me?"
I watched Max's face as he searched in my eyes for a minute and then got up to finish getting dressed.
"Jayse I just want to grow up that's all" Max said with his back to me.
"And there is nothing wrong with that Max" I said, "but I mean I have to ask because lately you have abandoned me when I needed you the most."
"I did not abandon you" Max said quickly.
"Max I went through a lot these past few weeks, months even" I said getting up and walking over to my bed, "but the person I wanted to speak to it about the most wasn't around."
"But Jayse you know that you can always call me anytime" Max stated.
"Why should I call you Max when you should be here" I yelled, "we paid an extra deposit just so we would be roommates and now a week in you're telling me that you would rather just move on."
"I'm not moving on Jayse" Max said sitting back on his bed after he was done getting dressed, "I'll always be here, you know that."
"Okay if you say so" I said annoyed with Max's new attitude.
"Look I got to go" Max said looking at his watch, "we'll talk about this tomorrow ok?"
"Tomorrow?" I asked surprised, "so you're not coming back tonight?"
"Rich's dad has been invited to this fundraiser and they invited me" Max stated as I looked at him with a quizzing look.
"Whatever" I said getting up to take my shower.
"Look I'll call you later ok" Max said as his cell phone rang. I watched him walk out the door as I shook my head.
What happened to the supportive cousin that I had last year? What happened to the guy that I could speak to about anything? What happened to my best friend?
I took my shower and got ready for class as I left my dorm room. I was still reeling over what transpired earlier with Max but I had to shake everything off and move on.
Throughout my classes today I tried to focus and eliminate anything that had to do with Max or Brandon. I went to the café to have a snack and like clockwork Q showed up.
"I'm not stalking you ok?" Q said walking by my table, "I just came to get something to eat."
"It's fine Q, have a seat" I said much to his surprise.
"Really?" Q asked smiling holing an apple and a shake in his hands.
"Yea I need the company right now" I said sadly as Q quickly took off his backpack and took a seat.
"What's wrong?" Q asked softly as I held back my tears.
"Um I may have lost my best friend" I said quickly as a tear fell.
"What?" Q asked shocked, "who? Eryck, Toney, Max?"
I nodded my head when Q said Max as he reached over his right hand and placed it over my left.
"What's up with Max?" Q asked as I shook my head and wiped my eyes.
"I don't know" I said softly, "all I know is that lately he has been acting really weird and this morning he came to our room saying that he wants to move out."
"Move out for what?" Q asked as I shook my head answering.
"I don't know" I said honestly.
"Jayse he may be going through something" Q said as I cut him off.
"Q I'm going through something" I said hurt as I regretted saying it aloud, "Brandon came by last night and we officially broke up."
"Wow" Q said as I looked at him confused, "I mean I'm sorry Jayse."
"Maybe I shouldn't be talking to you right now" I said getting my stuff.
"Wait Jayse" Q said stopping me, "I mean we're friends now. You've made it clear that this is what you want."
I stopped and looked at Q for a minute as he said that. Was he really letting go of this fantasy of us together? Did he really just want a friendship and nothing more?
"I mean I really want to be more but you've made it clear more than once that you need space and you need a friend right now, not a lover" Q stated, "so that's what I intend to be."
"Tha...Thank you Q" I said stuttering, "I honestly can't believe you just said that."
"I want what's best for you Jayse" Q said honestly.
"Even if you might not be it" I said quickly as I saw Q bite his tongue.
"You've made it clear that I'm not what you want" Q said as I looked down at the table, "is that true?"
"I just need a friend right now Q" I said truthfully.
"Then that's what I'll be" Q said as I smiled, "I only want what's best for you Jayse."
"Thank you Q" I said, "so what's new in your world?"
"Well our first football game is this Friday" Q said taking a bite of his apple, "practices are getting intense right now."
"I bet" I said smiling at his appetite.
"Classes are whipping my butt" Q stated.
"Really, which ones?" I asked shocked.
"French!" Q stated as he sighed heavily.
I thought to myself if I should bring up the fact that I was great in French but I didn't want to toot my horn anymore.
I just sat there and listened to him as we caught up. I knew for a fact that I didn't want to pursue a relationship with him; I just really needed a friend. I thought about calling Terrance but decided to stay against it, altogether.
After lunch, Q walked me over to my last class of the day as I tried to block Brandon out of my head. Flashbacks continued to flood my head as I thought of words that we said to each other last.
I couldn't concentrate! I needed to get out. Once the professor turned his back to us, I slipped out the back door and went walking to my dorm room.
I got a call from Omar stating that he wanted to see me. I got confused because I never really got calls from him. I agreed to meet him at the water fountain on campus as I walked over intrigued.
I knew it had to be about Toney but I decided to play the meeting by ear in case I was wrong.
"Hey Omar" I said walking up to him as he sat waiting for me.
"What's up Jayse" Omar said standing up to shake my hand. Awkward.
"How are your classes going?" Omar asked me as I sat down next to him.
"They are going" I said as he looked into my eyes, "how about you?"
"I'm too stressed to think about classes right now" Omar said sadly as I sighed knowing where this conversation was going already.
"I'm sorry" I said sympathetically, "what's wrong?"
The minute I said that, Omar looked at me with a look that said, "come on." All I could do was say that I was sorry again as Omar shook his head.
He then began to pour out his heart, telling me about how he couldn't sleep and how he was feeling anxious all the time.
"I mean Jayse I never knew how much I needed Toney until now, you know what I mean?" Omar said as I listened.
"I miss him laughing and his smile man" Omar stated blushing as my heart melt, "I just need my baby right now."
"I understand" I said not really sure what to say. I was still lost at the fact that he was reaching out to me.
"Well at least you and Brandon are just taking a break right now" Omar stated as my hurt dropped. I guess he didn't hear the news yet.
"Um..." I said starting out, "we're not really taking a break anymore."
"What do you mean?" Omar asked me with a concerned look.
"Brandon and I broke up" I said truthfully as Omar stared at me with eyes wide open.
I waited for him to say something as he looked puzzled and confused trying to piece what happened.
"I mean I thought that you guys took a break" Omar stated, "when did you guys break up?"
"Yesterday" I said feeling uncomfortable.
"I'm sorry Jayse" Omar said quickly as he rubbed my back. It felt really awkward talking to Omar of all people about Brandon and I; not to mention the fact that he was consoling me.
"Well let's just change the subject" I stated as I looked around at some of the kids playing on the campus grounds.
"Ok that's fine" Omar said quickly.
For the next few minutes I sat there listening to Omar vent to me more about how much he cared for Toney as I tried my hardest to not say anything. I was finally seeing first-hand exactly what Eryck was talking about.
"Well I better get going" I said quickly noticing the sunset.
"Yea I know what you mean" Omar said standing up as I followed him, "thanks for listening to me Jayse."
"No problem" I said softly as Omar reached in for a hug. I hugged him back awkwardly as we said our goodbyes.
I walked back to my dorm, not really knowing what to make of the conversation. I reached for my phone out of pocket as I noticed that I missed quite a few texts messages and calls.
While skimming through the texts, I noticed that the majority of them were from Terrance. I found myself desperately wanting one of them to be at least from Brandon, but figured that he was keeping his distance from me.
It was a good thing that I came to school and away from home. I had a chance to start my life over and break free from the past.
First Daniel and now Brandon, when will the pain end. Once I walked into the dorm, I was taken aback when I saw a blast from my past.
"Hi Jayse" Kris said holding a box in his hand with some of his stuff inside.
"What the hell are you doing here?" I asked upset as Kris smiled.
"What are you talking about?" Kris said, "I'm going to school here."
"How in the hell can you go to school here?" I said cutting Kris off, "you are an accomplice in the murder of my father.
"Jayse what are you talking about?" Kris said looking confused as people starting walking by staring.
"You know exactly what I am talking about" I said, "you didn't even graduate...why am I talking to you."
I walked past Kris as I started to dial my phone. Right when I was getting ready to call someone Terrance called as I mistakenly answered.
"Jayse" Terrance said as I held the phone away from my face, "Jayse! Hello! Jayse is that you?"
I didn't want to talk to him right now. I couldn't bear dealing with anymore drama right now. I walked back into the lobby and past Kris as he called after me.
"Jayse" Kris yelled following me.
"Stop following me" I yelled as I walked into the street trying to get away from Kris.
"Jayse wait" Kris yelled behind me.
"I cannot believe you are out here walking around free" I said turning around to face him for the first time.
"Jayse I had nothing to do with your father being killed" Kris stated.
"Really?" I asked upset, "I saw you at the courthouse!"
"Jayse listen to me" Kris pleaded.
"Why in the hell should I..." I said cutting myself off, "I want to hit you so bad but I'm not a fighter."
"Would you listen to me please?" Kris yelled as I breathed heavily, "I'm sorry about your dad, ok? As much as I didn't like you a year ago, I would never wish anything like that on you. I'm not a killer, nor do I condone it!"
"Bullshit!" I said surprised at myself for what I just said.
"Jayse you have to believe me" Kris pleaded.
"Why should I listen to anything that you have to say?" I asked staring Kris in the eyes.
"Because..." Kris said stopping in mid sentence.
"Because what?" I asked upset.
"Because I need your help?" Kris said to me as I looked at him confused. All I could think to myself was, "what in the hell is going on?"
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