It was a bad day for me. The company I worked for was going broke and I was taking a involuntary three week vacation without pay. I was headed for my lover's apartment for a little solace in his arms and to invite him to my cabin for the holidays. My luck didn't get any better.
Typically, the current man of my dreams turned out to be the current man of my nightmares. He was a huge handsome man; six three, two twenty pounds, muscles I couldn't get two hands around, and a pecker that could make me howl in pleasure. His sole fault was that he was a good deal rougher than he needed to be when we loved, and he'd never let me screw him. He treated me like a whore, but then men seemed to like doing that to me.
I let myself into his apartment to surprise him. Bad move! He was fully involved with another body builder. I was shocked, shocked I tell you. Not because the current man of my dreams was involved with another man, the clues had been piling up for the last two weeks. What shocked me was that he was the one getting screwed, and the sex was brutal.
I turned for the door when my 'lover' saw me.
"Get him!" he screamed and leapt for me, nearly toppling his even larger lover. "He's a fucking pussy not a man. We can have a lot of fun teaching the pussy how men are supposed to take a fucking."
There was no way I could fight the two of them. I'm just over five feet tall and weigh a hundred pounds. My 'lover's' first punch nearly broke my jaw and I was spitting blood when his buddy hit me in the kidneys. I'm not an idiot and I'm not completely defenseless. In my jacket pocket was a handy little device known as a cattle prod. You apply the thing to a cow's rump, hit the switch and the cow moves vigorously away from the electrical shock. The stupid cow moves in the direction of a man holding an electrode that will fry its brain, but the cow's stupidity is why you can buy steaks in a supermarket.
The cattle prod is equally effective on men determined to beat and/or fuck you to death. I stung them both enough (and myself once; damn did that hurt!) to make them back away. I backed toward the door as my ex lover went for a meat cleaver. I was out the door in a flash and slammed it behind me. My exlovers big buddy was on my heels as I went out the door. I held the prod against the door knob and when it started to turn I triggered the prod. My lover's buddy was as stupid as a cow. Not only did he forget that metal door knobs are conductive, he reached for the knob twice more before it sunk into his peabrain to try something else. I could hear them screaming at each other as I ran for the stairs.
As soon as I got back to my townhouse, I grabbed my 'weekend' bag from under the bed, set the alarms and left for my refuge; my cabin. I wasn't spending any more time than I had to in town. I knew my ex-boyfriend didn't know where my cabin was, but he did know about my townhouse. I do computer programming and systems design for a security firm and Mike wasn't nearly clever enough to evade the security I'd designed for my own home. It would be safe even if I wasn't there.
The same systems protected my cabin. When my Dad knew his cancer was incurable, he'd called my sister, brother and I to him. He'd already put his stocks and bonds into a trust we couldn't tap and from which we'd share the proceeds. It was the real property he called us together to discuss. My sister and brother wanted the California and Florida beach properties and the city apartments. All I wanted was the little cabin and its 280 acres of land. My sister and brother were delighted. They wound up with the motor yachts and the sailboats and Dad's auto collection as well as most of the real estate. I had everything I wanted -- the cabin; although he did buy my townhouse for me.
As I drove to the cabin I knew I wouldn't be coming back to town until after the holidays. My layoff gave me a perfect opportunity to spend time in the woods I loved and I intended to use every second I had to do just that. It's normally a three hour drive, but tonight it was going to be considerably longer. It was starting to snow and I needed to make a few stops for food on my way to the woods. I used my cell phone and laptop to reset the thermostat in the cabin so it would be warm when I arrived. After all my stops there was four inches of snow on the ground when I turned off the main road and down the long lane to the cabin. It looked like the snow was not going to let up so I parked my SUV in the garage. It would make it easier to put the chains on it in the morning.
The cabin was warming up nicely when I unlocked the door. I started the fireplaces, the huge pot bellied stove that was the primary heat source in the winter and the smaller cook stove in the kitchen, and let them replace the furnace heating the cabin.
It was a small cabin. It was essentially a thirty by thirty foot room and a loft. I slept in the loft in the winter and on the screened back porch in the summer. The big fireplace was in the living room area but there was a small one in the kitchen as well. It was a 'cooking' fireplace and had a pot hook and a pivoting grill on which to cook. It even had a small oven next to it. The furniture was all handmade by my grandfather and the family had been very careful when we installed the electric service and indoor plumbing to make sure they were unobtrusive. For me, the cabin was as big a piece of heaven as I'd ever need.
After a quick dinner I went to the bookcase I'd restocked at the end of the summer season, pulled the first book off the shelf and went in front of the big fireplace to read. I planned on working my way down the shelf over the holidays. I was content to read during the evening except for one moment soon after I started. I had to get up to take an aspirin when my face started to ache.
I had a huge bruise on my face and one eye was blackening but there was no major damage. As I sat down I realized I had had a number of lovers in my life, but never a true friend.
"Just once, I'd love to have a real friend to spend the holidays with me. A lover would be nice, but a friend is what I need right now. Maybe it just isn't possible for a gay man to find both a true friend and a lover in the same person. But this Christmas a friend is all I ask for."
I read until a light tapping on the door scared the shit out of me. All I could think of was that Mike and his current fucker had found me. The tapping was insistent. I went to the mantle and stuffed my trusty cattle prod under my belt behind my back. After I'd made very sure the thing was off. I turned on the porch light and peeked out the window. I still didn't see what was tapping on my door. I sucked in a breath and opened the door. I looked around and saw nothing.
"I'm down here Toby," a voice said.
I looked down at the smiling face of a very small man. I'm only five feet tall, this guy didn't even reach my waist. He was coatless and clad in a red tunic and green leggings. Clearly the man was out of his mind. It was snowing so hard I couldn't see the fence around the pond, let alone the pond. And the pond was only two hundred feet from the door. The small man shivered.
"Please, Toby. May I come in? I fell in both your creek and your pond and I'm not getting any warmer standing out here in the cold."
I backed away from the door and let the tiny man enter. I'd initially thought a small child had stumbled up to my cabin, but the small face that smiled up at me was definitely a man's face.
Dark hair poked out from under a stocking cap that covered the top of his head and most of his ears. The cap was red and had a white tassel. Water ran form the waterlogged man into a pool on the floor.
"I'll get you a towel. I don't have any clothes that will fit but I've got a sweat shirt that will cover most of you," I told him as I went to fetch the towel.
When I got back the small man was naked and standing with his back to the fire. He certainly was a man. He had a cute little dick between his legs. When he got excited the thing would be less than three inches long, but it was a man's dick, not a boy's. For some reason he still wore the silly hat. I tossed him the towel and he gratefully started to dry himself.
"Toby Heathenbottom, I'm Glidden," the tiny figured laughed. "Brace yourself, Toby," he chuckled. Then he pulled off the hat. I jumped back and pulled the cattle prod out and pointed it at him. His ears were pointed and very long.
"I'm a Christmas elf, Toby. And I'm here on the orders of Santa Clause. Well kind of on his orders, sorta, actually. I got in a bit of trouble and Santa decided I needed to do some public service to make up for it. It really wasn't all my fault, you know. I was just in the stables showing Muley how two guys could have fun in a hay mound. It wasn't my fault that Muley'd never bent over for an elf before, he always enjoyed the other end of a fucking. And how was I to know Mrs. Claus was going to show the German wood elves the stables. I mean really, if you were to find a willing guy and a hay loft wouldn't you naturally...."
"Stop this shit! Who are you?" I shouted as the thing that called itself an elf chattered inanely. "I've got this cattle prod and I'm not afraid to use it."
The 'elf' stopped chattering and looked suspiciously at the cattle prod.
"Is that the one you used on Mike and his buddy today? It doesn't look all that bad, but Santa said they'd screamed like the dickens when you poked them with it. When you nailed Mike's buddy through the doorknob it took them a half hour to get up the nerve to open the door."
"Yes, its the same one. And I'll use it on you if you don't tell me who you are and how you got here and how you know my name and how you know about Mike and how....."
The elf burst into laughter.
"Santa said I'd like you. You chatter as much as I do. I really am an elf, Toby and everything I know about you I got from Santa. Here, let me show you," he said as he reached for his pile of sodden clothes.
"If you move, I'll nail you sucker. This thing might even kill you, you're so small -- and wet."
The 'elf' sighed.
"Let's get it out of the way then Toby. Go ahead and use it on me. It can't hurt nearly as much as it did when I tried juggling chains saws and missed one. I can't be killed, Toby but I can be hurt. I tell you when I dropped that chain saw, it hurt like hell. Have you ever cut your pecker off with a chain saw Toby? That thing cut a six inch deep gash in me from the nipple to the crotch and hurt like you can't believe. There I was trying not to drop the other chain saws on me while my pecker was twitching on the floor like a snake with a belly ache. It hurt all night long and I never got any sleep. But in the morning my pecker had grown back, but I tell you, I'm never going to juggle chain saws again. Maybe sabers or axes...."
"Stop nattering. I mean it ---elf-- If you don't tell me who you really are I'll use this on you."
"Well then do it Toby," the elf said sadly. He stuck his fingers in his huge ears, squeezed his eyes tightly shut and turned his head away. The little guy was shaking like a leaf. I suddenly felt like a brute. And a brute was not something I wanted to be.
"I'm not going to do it, Glisten. I was just bluffing," I told the shivering elf.
He didn't move. I repeated my remark but he still stood there shivering. I stepped up next to him and pulled a finger out of his ear.
"I'm not going to hurt you Glisten."
The elf smiled up at me. It was an amazing smile and the room brightened around me.
"Gee, thanks Toby. I sure wasn't looking forward to that. And my name is Glidden. My mother was Glidtune and my pop was Dentor, so I'm Glidden. Get it? Glidtune, Dentor..."
"I get it Glidden. And why did you stuff your fingers in your ears. This thing doesn't make any noise."
"No it doesn't, but my screaming does. And when you've got ears like mine, loud noises like screams really hurt. I remember when I was first assigned to the stables. Rudolf 234 was in a foul mood and when I went into his stall to brush him, he kicked me in the gum drops. I tell you I couldn't tell which hurt worse, my gum drops or my ears when I started screaming. Since them I'm real careful about...."
"Glidden! Focus!" I wanted it to be a command, but it came out as a laugh.
"Now you sound like Dr. Moss, the elf doctor. He's been telling me to 'focus' since Broccoli and I had too much hard apple cider and were seeing who could stick his head the furthest into the stamping machine and get it out in one piece. I lost. You talk about hurt! That thing smashed my head to a tenth of an inch thick, and spread it out to the size of a car door. I mean my brains came out my nose and my ears like there was no tomorrow. I still think I can show you some of the stains on my tunic. Brain stains are worse than tomato to get out. And this is my best tunic and...."
"I give up!" I laughed in frustration. That was a first for me. I'd never heard of someone laughing in frustration before. But Glidden was so cute and so horribly unfocused that it was impossible not to like him.
"Would you like some hot chocolate, Glidden?"
The little eyes got wide and glittered in the light.
"You have hot chocolate? How wonderful. Some elves like hot chocolate more than sex. Not me! But damn I love hot chocolate.
Yes!! Thank you Toby, I would love some hot chocolate. And could you toss me that sweatshirt. There's a draft cooling my ass."
I tossed him the sweatshirt and he pulled it over his head. The waist fell past his knees. He looked at himself and laughed. Then he spun around once. When he faced me again the shirt fit him perfectly. I was flabbergasted.
"Uh....How'd you do that?"
"You're a human. Are you sure you want to know?" he laughed. Elves seemed to spend an inordinate amount of time laughing. "And would you fetch the bottoms for me? My butt's still hanging out in the breeze."
I got him the bottoms and watched as he pulled them on. With his crotch in the crotch of the pants the waist line was almost to his eyes. He carefully spun again and the pants fit.
"These are great Toby. Thanks. Now about that hot chocolate."
I led him to the kitchen area and he trailed behind me looking at everything.
"All I've got is instant hot chocolate. It probably isn't as great as it is at the North Pole."
"Northern Greenland, Toby. Santa's workshop is in northern Greenland, perched on the last piece of ice free bedrock before you hit the ice cap. Everyone thinks the workshop is at the north pole but it really isn't. Do you have any whipped cream? I love hot chocolate with whipped cream."
"Sorry, Glidden. I've got some milk though. Down here they separate the cream from the milk when they process it."
"Why on earth would they do that?"
"So they can sell the cream for more than they can the milk?"
"Oh. Well no matter. Milk and cream are almost the same thing, magically speaking. Where's the milk and I'll need a bowl and a fork."
The elf poured milk into the bowl and looked at it. Then he grabbed a fork and beat the milk. His hand whipped the milk faster than any human hand could. His hand was a blur. He stopped for a second to empty the sugar bowl into the milk, added more milk, looked at it again and started whipping. In a heartbeat the bowl was full of whipped cream.
"Don't ask Toby," he chortled as he put a huge spoonful on his hot chocolate and another one on mine. He carried both his hot chocolate and the bowl of whipped cream to my couch in front of the fireplace. "We can eat the whipped cream as we sip the hot chocolate. Bring your own spoon."
Glidden poked up the fire as Toby took a seat in one corner of the couch. Glidden put the bowl of whipped cream on Toby's lap, grabbed his own hot chocolate and sidled up to Toby. He wormed his way against the man and laid back against him. Toby was shocked and even more shocked to feel his pecker squirm.
"Isn't this a trifle too familiar for two guys who just met?" he asked the elf. He had to wait until the elf finished a huge spoonful of whipped cream to get an answer.
"Toby, you've been looking at boys since you were twelve, chasing them since you were thirteen and bedding them since you were fifteen. I was looking and chasing them from about the same age, but I've been bedding them for over 800 years. We might have just met, but we both know that snuggling up to a man is our passion."
"A queer elf? That's never mentioned in folklore."
"Toby, I'm as alive as you are. That should tell you that folklore and reality don't match up very well. Plus elves are darn near immortal. I was born in Santa's workshop eight hundred and thirty four years ago and only four elves there are younger than me. And only one has died. Out of ten thousand or so elves at the workshop, only twenty five hundred are girls. Otherwise the earth would be miles deep in elves. Elves mate for life Toby. What do you think the other 5000 boy elves do for fun at night."
Toby thought about that. "Sounds like the north pole is a great place to be if you're gay."
The elf laughed uproariously. "Damn right buddy. But we don't just fuck around up there you know. Ten thousand elves make just over six billion toys a year, cook for each other, make our clothes, take care of about ten million animals destined to be Christmas gifts, and groom eighteen thousand reindeer. And I know about reindeer. That's my job, or was. I was a reindeer caretaker. Do you have any idea how much shit eighteen thousand reindeer make, or how much the little bugger's eat. Why I tell you Toby...."
The small man squeezed the knee of his tiny new friend to shut him up.
"Why so many reindeer?"
"Because Santa has to go everyplace on Earth in one night, silly. Santa needs two thousand teams of reindeer to do it. The caretakers take a loaded sled and a team out someplace and wait. Santa drops by with an empty sled and nine tuckered out reindeer. He hops in the other sleigh and takes off. We fly the reindeer back to the workshop, drop them off and fly another laden sled and a new team someplace else to meet Santa. We do that all night long. You didn't think nine reindeer did it all by themselves did you? Or that one sleigh could hold six billion toys?"
"Actually, Glidden. I haven't thought much about Santa since I was six years old. I'm still trying to figure out if this is a dream."
"It's real Toby. If you don't believe it, pull off your slippers and walk around the outside of the cabin. Toes don't get frostbitten in dreams. Open your mouth and close your eyes."
Toby did but wasn't very happy about doing so. He wasn't sure he trusted the elf. A truly huge glob of whipped cream was crammed into his mouth. He swallowed it, barely. It was far too sweet and rich.
"How many dreams have you had where whipped cream was part of the scene?" the elf laughed and used a tiny hand to squeeze Toby's leg. "It's a very strange dream if its got elves and whipped cream in it. And all you had for dinner was soup, so it couldn't be something you ate."
"How do you know all this about me?"
"Because of the list, silly, except it's really this big book. Santa gave me your page before he sent me here." The elf leapt off the couch and rummaged around in his soaked tunic until he found something. He hopped on Toby's lap and squirmed until he was comfortable. He gave a contented sigh and handed Toby the wadded up parchment. "It's still kinda wet Toby."
Toby read from the page:
"Toby Heathenbottom. Male. Gay. Age 28. Computer programer for Acme Security Systems. Currently furloughed; soon to be unemployed. Acme will fold in January. Drop hint for him to sell stock. Generally nice, naughty on occasion. Lousy choice in men."
"Now ain't that the truth?" he told the elf as he continued to read. "Prefers top role in sex; assumes bottom role because he thinks it's expected of him. Lacks confidence in himself and lets others take advantage of him. Doesn't use sex toys. Loves the outdoors because it's the only place he can be himself. Never had a close friend; needs one far more than a lover. Hey! This is getting kind of personal! Why does Santa care about what role I play and whether I use sex toys?"
"Of course it's personal, you ninny. He's been watching you for 28 years. Besides, we have a workshop that makes sex toys as gifts. I was in there once. You should have seen the size of the dildo they were making for this Sumo wrestler. The big guy wasn't even gay. He just thought fucking himself with the thing would make his spirit stronger. Didn't work out quite the way the guy expected though. His wife caught him using it, yanked it out of his butt and damn near beat him to death with it. Then there was this guy who wanted the inflatable girl doll. You should have seen the size of the knockers on it. Rumor says that when the guy tried to blow it up on Christmas day he collapsed a lung. Then there's the story about the huge two headed dildo with inflatable heads. Two very close buddies shoved the thing in their butts and pumped the heads up. Unfortunately they broke the valve. They couldn't pull it out of themselves. A doctor at the emergency room had to....."
Toby put his finger against the elf's lips. "Enough Glidden. Enough," the small man laughed. "Now tell me why Santa kicked you out of the workshop. My best guess is that it's because you talk too much."
The elf in his lap turned scarlet, and looked away.
"How'd you know?" he whispered softly.
"Because you're here, Glidden, when you should be mucking stables and loading sleighs. The only reason I can think of an elf to be thousands of miles from the workshop the week before Christmas is because Santa kicked you out. What'd you do buddy?"
The elf looked up at him and smiled. It was a sweet smile and a shy one.
"Buddy?" the elf asked hopefully.
"You're sitting on my lap, eating whipping cream by the pint and chugging hot chocolate while you're wiggling your ass against my pecker. The little sausage between your legs says you're happy to be in my lap and my hard salami says it's okay for you to sit there. Doesn't that qualify us as buddies?"
"Yeah, it does! I've never had a human buddy before. This is totally cold!"
"Cool, Glidden. The kids say something is totally cool. Now what did you do to get kicked out of the workshop?"
"Well, the camel that broke the straw's back happened this very evening. As I told you Muley and I were fucking around in the hay bin when Mrs. Claus brought the German elves though on a tour. I was having a great time with Muley and he was too. At just the right moment sexually, but at exactly the wrong moment in every other sense he stuck his head out of the hay and screamed in pleasure. Mrs. Claus turned to see Muley on his knees with me on my knees behind him. That nice little pecker of his was pumping his happiness at her. Naturally the German elves' were scandalized. They got all in a huff and stamped out. They take themselves far too seriously anyway. I mean what self-respecting elf wears short shorts held up by suspenders, and knee socks for gosh sakes? Anyway the herdmaster had to report me to Santa. Muley got off Scot free. I mean he already works the stables, it's hard to punish someone who works in a stable. I've been in trouble a few times before. It's never been my fault but someone had to take the fall."
"If having stable duty is a punishment, what did you do to wind up in the stables?"
"That wasn't my fault either. I was a toy maker in the new action figure department before they sent me to the stables. I was just joking around and I made two anatomically correct GI Joes. I painted them real carefully and they really looked great. I bored little holes in their butts and mouths and posed them on my work bench. It was really cute and harmless really. Except someone made a mistake and they got wrapped up and shipped. Is it my fault a fundamentalist preacher's son found them under the tree? Just because they were still coupling when the kid unwrapped them, it was all my fault. I spent three hundred years making dolls after they booted me out of the clock shop. Every time someone fucks up and I'm in the area I'm the one who gets screwed. Figuratively unfortunately. I started in the clock shop way back when mechanical clocks were new. Damn I was a good clock maker. Clocks were prized back then. It was the coldest...uh coolest shop to work in, but they booted me into toys because I made one tiny mistake. I ask you is that fair?"
Toby couldn't help himself. The little elf on his lap was utterly charming. He hugged the creature and the little elf giggled and squirmed in delight.
"What did you do in the clock shop, Glidden? Paint an ass in place of a moon on the phases of the moon dial?"
"What a great idea, Toby! I'd have never thought of that. A moon for a moon. Damn, you should have been an elf. We'd have a great time together. Anyway, I was working on two clocks that day. It was the late seventeenth century I think. One was for the truly ancient bishop and one was for the owner of a Paris whore house. I spent two days doing the art work on the faces. It was some of my best work. "
"Shipped to the wrong place again?" Toby laughed.
"Yeah, but that's not what got me fired. I'd done angels on both clock faces, except the one for the whore house..."
"Had the little boy and girl cherubs fucking each other," Toby supplied.
"No. It was a gay Paris whorehouse I made the clock for. When the addled bishop got his clock all he saw were the chubby little boy angels sucking each other off. Kind of an airborne 69 don't cha know. Anyway the bishop really, really liked my clock. He made his priests sit still while he did to them what the little angels were doing to each other. Saint Peter himself came to the workshop to complain to Santa. You have no idea how pissed off he was. Can you imagine a thunderstorm in the Arctic? I had to apologize to Saint Peter in person. He grabbed my hand and took me to Hell, and I mean Hell with the big fucking H. I was only there for a second but Saint Peter said he'd leave me there if I ever fucked up a gift to anyone in the church again. Believe me Toby. What ever you do, stay away from Hell. It was so terrifying I didn't stop shaking for ten years. Ever since then, Santa has to keep me out of sight when the angels stop by. Take it from me Toby. Don't piss off an angel."
The little elf was shuddering violently so Toby did the only thing he could. He held the elf tightly against him. Toby was shuddering himself.
"There are really angels? I am truly fucked Glidden. Gay men don't get into heaven."
The elf looked up at Toby.
"If there are elves, Toby, there kind of have to be angels don't there? " The elf's humor returned suddenly. He laughed at Toby's stricken face. "Don't worry so much about heaven Toby. Where do you think I found the models for my artwork? The paintings were very life like. Those two cherubs hovered over my workbench for two days. They never took their lips off the other cherub's dick. Was it my fault they silly little things distracted me when I was boxing the clocks?"
"So Santa punished you for your three mix-ups by kicking you out of his workshop and sending you to the worst place on earth. He sentenced you to spending time with a fucked over and abjectly miserable gay man in a lonely cabin in the mountains. That's not much of a Christmas for an elf is it Glidden?" Toby said sadly.
The elf looked up at Toby and wiped the dampness off the small man's cheeks. He studied Toby's face and then gently rubbed the livid bruise on Toby's face. The pain faded rapidly and Toby felt the swelling and pain in his jaw go away.
"He didn't send me here to punish me Toby, my fuckups were just what got his attention enough for him to take a good look at me, and give me something productive to do," the tiny voice whispered quietly. "You asked Santa for a friend to spend the holidays with. He chose me and told me it was the most important assignment he'd ever given an elf. He said the most important thing anyone can do for another is to be a friend. He looked at both our souls, Toby, and decided I was the friend you needed. Hello Toby Heathenbottom, my friend."
The little elf rose to his feet and stood on Toby's thighs. When the elf kissed Toby, the warmth of the tiny lips sent a wave of friendship through the small man. No passion, merely friendship. But the friendship was far stronger than the feelings of love he thought he'd felt in the past. The 'loves' of his life had never even risen to the level of friendship. The 'loves' of his life were only lust. It nearly broke Toby's heart. If he'd mistaken lust for love and what he was experiencing now was friendship not love, then Toby had spent his entire adult life searching for the wrong thing. No wonder he was so miserable. Toby returned the chaste kiss as best he could. How did one put friendship into a kiss?
"Hello, Glidden, my friend," he whispered to the elf.
The elf laughed. He patted Toby's no longer swollen and bruised cheek.
"Go get some wood for the pot bellied stove and I'll bank the fire in the fireplace and put some wood in the kitchen stove. You've had a long day. You go on to bed and I'll sleep here by the fire tonight."
Toby put wood in the old stove as the elf banked the fires. He turned off the lights and locked the doors of the cabin. In the dim light of the fireplace he saw the elf curl up on the rug in front of the fire. That didn't seem a proper way to treat a friend. He went to the rug and picked up the tiny elf. The elf laughed softly as he carried him up to the loft. Toby put the elf in his bed then undressed and climbed in with the elf.
"You're safe with me elf," he laughed. "Our equipment is the same, but the scales are all wrong." Toby never remembered laughing so much in an evening, and it puzzled him.
"If you can't make love, just make 'snuggle'" the elf laughed back.
The sweat suit clad elf snuggled happily back against the small man, and Toby happily wrapped his arms around the elf.
"By the way Glidden how'd you get here from the workshop so quickly? It was only an hour or so since I made my wish until you were tapping at my door. And how did you get so wet?"
"I came by reindeer. Donner 1295 brought me, and she's one fast flying reindeer. The Donner's are so near sighted they'd fall off every roof in the world if Comet's ass wasn't six inches from their noses. But the Donners are my favorites. I didn't think she was so nearsighted that he couldn't find the road to your cabin. She misjudged her landing by a hair and landed on the left edge of the road when I told her to land in the middle. I hopped off her back and rolled down the bank into the stream. I walked in the direction of your cabin and when I saw the lights I took a short cut across the field. The field turned out to be six inches of snow on an inch of ice on the pond. I was one honked off elf when I got to your porch. It all turned out all right though didn't it Toby?"
"Yes it did, my tiny friend," Toby whispered sleepily as he settled himself around his new friend.
Toby awoke alone in his bed. A short sob escaped him. The elf he'd taken to bed with him was merely a dream. He crawled sadly out of bed and looked over the rail of the loft. The fireplace had been relit and the one in the kitchen was going as well. He could smell bread baking and sausage roasting on the grate of the kitchen fire. He looked down to see Glidden dancing around the cabin with a dust rag and a mop. The elf was completely silent as he danced around cleaning the room. If there was a poster child for purposeful hyperactivity, the face of the child would be Glidden's. He still wore the sweat suit but Toby could see the neatly folded tunic and leggings on the easy chair by the couch. A small surge of happiness flowed through Toby, which was strange. Happiness didn't often surge through the small man.
Toby leaned against the rail and watched the elf work. It seemed that elves needed to be doing something constantly. The elf dusted his way to the fireplace and the mantle piece. The elf picked up the cattle prod and dusted under it. Glidden turned the prod over and examined it. He looked it over carefully and glanced over his shoulder as if to see if anyone was watching. Then he stuck the prod against his butt and pressed the switch.
"Yeeeeoooowwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!"
Toby watched as the shocked (literally!) elf leaped across the room. The fifteen foot leap was stupendous for someone two feet tall. Toby had the distinct impression that when the elf touched down the tiny creature was tempted to drop to the floor and hop around on his butt like a cartoon character with his ass on fire. Toby found himself on his knees laughing so hard he could hardly breath. Through the tears in his eyes he saw the elf looking up at him with an injured expression on the mortified face. With an excess of dignity the elf pulled himself to his feet and, with back erect, strutted back to the kitchen. The effect was ruined by the tiny hand rubbing the affected bun and the distinct limp. The bright red of the elf's huge ears didn't help either.
Toby laughed his way downstairs to the cabin's single bathroom and was engaged in his morning rituals when the door popped open and Glidden entered with a steaming cup of coffee.
"Don't you ever knock?" the small man said from his perch on the toilet.
"My bed was somewhere in the big open bay dormitory on the third floor of the southeast building in the west housing area. We had one big bathroom for all two hundred of us on the third floor. If we'd have to stop and knock and wait for someone to let us enter everytime we used the pissers, half the elves would have shit their pants standing in line. Besides, I already know the size of you equipment. You rubbed it against me all last night. Not that I minded, of course. You snuggle better than Morriten although he has a tendency to nibble when he snuggles. Tobisan had to get stitches in his tit when Morriten sneezed one night when he nibbling it. Boy was Tobisan glad Morriten wasn't nibbling on his candy cane."
Toby accepted the coffee. "How come you said your bed was 'somewhere' on the third floor," he teased the elf. The elf broke into a huge grin.
"Because I wasn't in it all that often. There were 199 gay elves on that floor and most were uninterested in sleeping alone. Elves are very sociable creatures, you know."
"Must have been hard to sleep with all the elf fucking going on all night."
The elf sniffed haughtily. "Elves don't make noise when they move and if we want to we don't make noise when we fuck around." He scratched his head and grinned. "Except for the north end boys. About once a month they'd push their beds together and about fifty of them would spend the night in a heap. It was a fun night for everyone but the elf on the bottom of the stack. Noisy too. It wasn't coincidence that that they assembled on nights after Chef Rosaleen made her famous ten bean fire-toad chili. There was so much gas in that pile that one night it spontaneously combusted. It blew the windows out and flaming elves were tossed as far as the research lab. Tittle told me Jackket was found buried to his waist in the glacier with his butt still smoldering a day later. The damage probably wouldn't have been so bad except everyone had chili that night. The explosion started in the pile but then propagated through the gas passed by the other hundred and fifty elves. I was having a great time with Sleepy that night and got away Scot free because I was underneath him. Sleepy is kind of furry, and very rotund, and the flash fire scorched him good. Talk about an orgasm! When his fur caught fire he went ballistic in my ass. It seemed to take months for his hair to grow back and did he ever smell when he snuggled up to me after the fact. Did you ever kiss I guy who's beard had just been burnt away, man did he taste lousy. Santa was so pissed that he made us...."
"You are one very tiny, lying sack of shit. You make up these stories don't you?" Toby asked as he stood up from the toilet.
The elf started a retort and then his eyes locked on Toby's pecker. A happy little smile appeared on the tiny face and little hands moved toward the tent developing in his sweat pants as the elf gently licked his lips.
"Then again, maybe you don't," Toby laughed.
The elf blushed and scurried back to the kitchen.
The pair ate the huge breakfast the elf had cooked and cleaned up the kitchen. Toby looked out the window and saw another foot of snow had fallen over night.
"I put the chains on your Explorer this morning and brought your cross country skis back to the porch. What say we go out for a little exercise after we have our coffee," the elf suggested as they cleaned up the dishes.
"What were you doing out in the garage?"
"Looking for your Christmas decorations. I couldn't find them in the cabin so I figured they were out there. Where are they?"
"At the townhouse. I had them out of the attic and was going to bring them up but I left in such a hurry yesterday, I forgot to put them in the wagon."
"No problem, I'll make a list as we have our coffee."
Toby carried their coffees to the couch while Glidden put the last of the dishes away. He joined Toby after carefully stepping around the cattle prod still lying on the rug in front of the fireplace..
"Why don't you put it back up on the mantle for me," Toby suggested.
"Uh....No, I don't think so." the elf murmured as he grabbed a little pouch from his possessions on the easy chair and climbed into Toby's lap and started his list.
The elf produced a small quill pen a bottle of ink and some parchment and started his list. Toby complemented the elf on his handwriting.
"If you put millions of little tags on gifts, your writing would be good too."
The elf studied his list and added another item or two, the wadded the list up and tossed it in the fire.
"Why on earth did you do that?"
"Because the list was sent just as soon as I finished writing. We aren't going to the store, all that stuff will get here via the delivery boys in a couple hours. It will take a little longer than usual because I had to route my list through a different office. Blorky and I still aren't seeing eye to eye after a little tiff we had a century or so ago."
Toby was tempted not to ask about the 'tiff' because he expected it would turn into another long tale; the bottom line of which was that nothing was Glidden's fault.
"It wasn't my fault, you know," the elf started. Toby sighed to himself and settled down for the story. The elf settled against him and after a sip of coffee, started the tale.
"Blorky came back from dinner early one evening and caught me in bed with Horden, whose cute little butt was one of Blorky's favorites. He didn't say anything that night but the next morning he sneaked down to my bed while I was still asleep. He yanked on my dick and then tied the thing in a knot. Damn did that hurt. Then he stood on my thighs and yanked the knot so tight I thought I'd die. Then he ticked me until the knotted cock got hard and pulled the knot even tighter. I tell you Toby the pain was worse than anything that had ever happened to me until I dropped that chain saw."
"Now I know you're lying, Glidden. No one can tie a knot in a pecker," Toby laughed.
"You don't know much about elves, Toby. Remember I told you we could be hurt but not killed. That means people can do a lot of things to us they can't do to humans. Watch.
Toby watched as Glidden pulled the sweat suit pants down and pulled out his pecker. He took a deep breath and blew on his thumb. Toby watched in amazement as the little thing started to inflate like a long thin balloon. Glidden grabbed his thumb and squeezed and took another deep breath. Then he appeared to blow more air into his dick. When the thing was about ten inches long Glidden stopped for a moment.
"That's as big as I can go without it really starting to hurt.
I'm not really inflating it but its kind of like a magical analogy of blowing the thing up. Impressive dick huh?"
Toby yawned. "For you maybe, but I've seen some big dicks in my time. Did Santa tell you about Mike's buddy yesterday. Now that was a big cock. The hardware hanging from it was way over the top though."
"Oh, so you're a big cock man huh. Well watch this! I love a challenge."
Toby watched in awe as the elf blew is pecker up to a foot, then two feet and then three. He looked down at the tiny face and saw the pain etched on it. Toby figured if he'd had his dick stretched to three feet it would have killed him.
"Very nice Glidden. But a little thin."
"Critic!" the elf gasped in pain. "Please tell me you've seen enough!"
Toby laughed and bent to kiss the pain filled face. "You've made your point Glidden."
"Keep a good grip on me Toby. This is really going to hurt," the elf moaned. Then he released the hold on the thumb that kept the 'air' in his pecker.
The only way Toby could describe what happened next was if you stretched a bungee cord out to its limit and then let go. The elongated dick snapped back into the elf's crotch with an audible slap and the elf lurched in Toby's arms as the recoil drove the elf back against the small man. The elf gave a horrible gasp of pain and jammed his hands over his offended member. The gasp was replaced with a whimper of misery. Toby felt horrible.
He kissed the tears from the tiny face and his hand gently moved the small ones away from the injured cock and gently stroked it. He gave his little friend some personal attention to distract the elf from his misery. When the tiny legs spread to give him more access and the little pecker recovered enough to stiffen, Toby suspected the elf was on his way to recovery. Since he was already kissing the small mouth and his hand was already on the elf's cock and since they were both gay and they were friends, after all; Toby continued his soft kisses and gentle manipulations.
The tiny back in his arms arched abruptly and the little cock in his hands took on a life of its own. The elf's return kiss was passionate as the elf pumped his pleasure all over Toby's hand.
Toby looked down on the happiest face he'd ever seen. As he watched the big ears reddened and the tiny face turned shy. The elf turned to burrow his face deeply into Toby's arms and Toby enfolded the small elf in his arms and let him snuggle to his heart's content. Toby stared contentedly into the fire as his friend curled tightly against him.
"Thank you Toby. No human's ever done that for me before."
"No sweat Glidden. It was a small favor for a good friend."
They sat in silence for who knows how long until the elf sat up and stretched languidly. He turned and kissed Toby to break the human's reverie. Toby looked down at his buddy.
"How'd you get the knot out of your pecker?"
"It took me a pain filled day Toby. I really had to relax until my dick went soft enough so I could work on the knot. I'd just get started when some asshole would stop by and either tickle or lick my dick until it went hard on me again. It wasn't until everyone went to dinner that night that they left me alone long enough to untie the thing. I've never forgiven Blorkey for that, but I got my revenge the next morning when he came back from his shower. I'm stronger than I look, and I stuffed his head up his ass and shoved him down the stairs."
"That's impossible," Toby gasped.
"It is possible but please don't ask me to demonstrate. It makes having your dick tied in a know feel like a pleasure, just ask Blorkey. Anyway, it took me a couple minutes to get his head next to his anus and then I had to jump up and down on him until his head slipped in. I knew I had him when his screams were suddenly muffled. It was kind of an ugly sight with just his neck showing at his anus and his feet and arms getting all tangled up with each other. I got him on his feet and led him over to the stairway and pushed him down them, each bounce driving his head further up his butt. He stumbled around the second floor landing before he tripped and tumbled down to the first floor where the dining room is. He rolled out between the tables and gave everyone a great show. He eventually got on his feet and wandered around crashing into things. It took him an hour to figure out he couldn't grab his neck and pull his head out of his own ass. He finally put his hands on his buns and pushed. It worked. He wound up spread eagled on the dance floor in the middle of the dining room with his rigid pecker sticking up. Evidently for some elves having your head stuck up your ass is an erotic experience. But I tell you he had the filthiest face I've ever seen. Blorkey still grimaces every time he licks his lips and flies into a rage when people call him a shit head."
"You're pulling my leg, Glidden. That never happened."
"Would I lie to you?"
"In a heartbeat!"
Glidden climbed to his feet and turned to Toby. He pulled the small man's face to his and gave the man a friendly kiss.
"Never, Toby. I'd never lie to you," the elf whispered.
He brightened almost immediately.
"Come on Toby. It's a beautiful snowy day and it's been a while since you were in the woods in a snow fall. I love snowy quiet days in the woods and so do you. Besides if we sit here we might get involved in something that will keep us from ever getting outside this cabin."
"And that's bad?" Toby said quietly as he kissed the elf.
The elf picked up Toby's hand and held it to his chest. "For the moment, my friend. When we've finished dinner tonight and the decorating is done and we sit in front of the fire and we realize that the most important thing in the world is to hold a friend tightly in our arms, we'll see what happens."
They didn't get back to the house until it was getting dark. Toby saw more of his land than he'd seen in years. He cross country skied behind the elf. The elf didn't need skis. He ran across the snow never sinking more than an inch into the surface. The elf had the time of his life. The little creature ran everywhere. He'd burrow under logs and emerge to tell Toby how many cubs the bear in the den would have. The elf would climb trees and stuff squirrel holes with acorns and pine cones. Of course, he just had to pull the squirrels out and wake them up so he could tell them about his good deed. The elf took joy in sneaking up on unsuspecting rabbits and barking like a coyote. The rabbits, the elf claimed, didn't find it the least bit amusing.
When they rested at lunchtime, Glidden disappeared into the trees and emerged with his cap full of pine nuts, acorns and plant bulbs. Toby was dubious when the elf handed him a handful of things Toby couldn't recognize. He sampled the mixture and found it a delightful and filling lunch. They'd run and skied through the afternoon before heading back to the cabin.
They were halfway across the clearing behind the cabin when Glidden screamed, "DUCK!!" Toby dived into the snow as something red flashed over his head followed by a several loud thumps. The elf was back on his feet immediately screaming up into the snowfall.
"Neutrino, you dipshit!!! You damn near killed us!! Santa will yank your license for this you idiot!!"
Toby climbed back to his feet and dusted off the snow. He looked out over the bales of hay laying helter skelter around the clearing.
"What on earth?"
"I ordered a hay drop for the clearing in my list this morning. If I'd known Neutrino was on duty I wouldn't have done it. The elf's a nut case."
"Now there's an elf accusing another's ears of being pointed," Toby whispered to himself.
"I heard that Toby! Now get your butt over here and help me break up the hay bales."
"Why?"
The elf laughed at pointed at the woods. "For them," he said as he pointed at the small herd of deer sticking their noses timidly out of the woods.
It was getting dark as Toby headed back to the cabin. It had been a fun but he'd put out more effort than he had planned and was a little tired. Glidden raced ahead and Toby could hear him talking to himself in delight. The elf was searching through a rather large pile of boxes and bags.
"It's all here! Everything I ordered. Someone even knew we'd be out walking the woods. There's a hot box here with our dinner in it. Go on in and take your shower Toby, I'll put the boxes on the porch and get dinner ready."
Toby wasn't about to argue with the elf. He wasn't sure he wanted to know how all the boxes got in his yard but since he'd been dived bombed by Neutrino carrying hay, Toby suspected more than one sleigh was involved. The smells coming from the 'hot box' made his stomach rumble in anticipation. He took off his skis and went in to take his shower.
Toby was drying his hair when Glidden came in and handed him a mug. It must have come with Glidden's shipment because Toby didn't own any mugs. He noted Glidden also had a mug in his hand.
"Ronaldo's the best brewer at the workshop. He sent me a quarter keg of his best beer and it's good stuff. Santa makes him pull all the alcohol out of it though. I guess it was almost a thousand years ago that the elves had a Christmas party they still lie about. Fortunately it was after Santa finished up his rounds. Ten thousand elves drunk themselves into a stupor. Did you know body functions continue even if you're passed out? The stories say the elves were passed out for five days. They didn't even try to clean up the dance hall. The elves all shed their cloths and they burned the dance hall down. The huge bonfire was an obvious reason to restart the party, and when Santa got back from his week in the south pacific he found all his elves passed out around the ashes of the dance hall."
The elf took a huge swig of beer and sighed. "It's still the best beer on the planet," he said happily. After his first sip, Toby had to agree. The elf flexed his knees and hopped onto the counter. He sat with his back to the mirror and sipped is beer as Toby finished drying himself off.
Toby began the tedious process of combing his hair. It fell past his shoulder blades. He liked long hair but the real reason he wore it long was because it seemed that it was fairly successful at attracting men. Big gay guys seemed to like small feminine looking men. Toby really loved the top role more than the bottom, but being fucked beat sleeping alone. But there were also evenings when being fucked brought pleasure that thrilled him to his core.
"You know Toby, you don't really need the long hair and the small feminine man charade to attract men," a soft voice whispered. "Just because you're a plain looking man in a small body, you assume that long hair and showing your 'feminine' side makes you more 'fuckable' when you go hunting big men. You're confusing lust with love again. The men you really want to have at your side are those who see the man you are and care about that man. How you dress or wear your hair are unimportant to the men you want and need most in your life. The men you want are all around you, but they see the facade you wear and how false it is so they won't approach you. The men you want in your life aren't the kind of men who can tolerate lies and falsehoods; and right now, Toby, that's all they see in you. That's why you wind up with men like Mike for lovers. They don't care about Toby, they just care about themselves. Toby's just as an ass that's readily available and tolerates anything a man wants to do to it."
Toby turned to give the elf a piece of his mind. The elf had a small sad smile on his face. The sad smile was for Toby. Toby was about to say something when he realized that only a friend would tell him what he needed to hear rather than what he wanted to hear. Someone strong enough to risk damaging a friendship was more than strong enough to help a friend make necessary changes in his life. As a friend of the elf, all Toby had to do was hear the words, and look beyond them to see the truth. The eyes behind the small sad smile showed Toby a strength he wished he had.
"What do I do Glidden?"
"What you need to do, Toby. You can't change what you are. But you have accept what you are, and do what you can to make yourself the finest person you can be with what you've been given. And you're already a finer person than you realize."
"That's not very specific, my friend."
"It's not meant to be specific, my friend. I was a clock maker before I mucked stables. I knew I could build any clock I wanted from the hundreds of pieces scattered on my workbench. You're a workbench full of parts Toby. There are boxes of talent, love, courage, gentleness, fear, anger and everything else that's a part of you. Take what you need from each box and build a clock called Toby. It doesn't have to be a pretty clock, but it does have to tell time accurately, just as the Toby you build has to accurately reflect you."
"You are an amazing creature Glidden. Who'd have ever expected an elf who revels in gay sex, story telling, and guzzling hot chocolate and beer would also be a philosopher."
The elf stood up on the counter and bent his head to kiss Toby's.
"And a friend, Toby. Above all -- a friend."
The elf leapt to the floor and was suddenly an elf again.
"Gimme your beer mug. I'll get you a refill and heat the rolls. Dinner will be ready by the time you get dressed," he laughed as he trotted back to the kitchen.
The pair feasted on roast goose, stuffing and fresh vegetables prepared in Santa's kitchens and shipped by sleigh. Roast goose was something new to Toby but instead of the greasy meat he'd expected, the goose was succulent and tender. Cherry pie and ice cream completed the meal.
"Maybe we should order takeout tomorrow night," Toby suggested as they cleaned the kitchen.
"We can try, but it probably won't work. We have enough food stashed on the porch to feed us for a couple weeks. This close to Christmas, the kitchens will put their efforts into making meals for those who need it more than we do. Besides, all elves are good cooks. We have to be because all elves work in the kitchens on a regular basis. It's one of those chores that isn't really a chore," the elf laughed. Then he sobered. "Say, it just hit me that I haven't had kitchen duty in a long time. I wonder why?"
"Would you want someone who mucks in a stable cooking your dinner?" the small man laughed.
The elf looked profoundly shocked then abashed.
"Hey! I wash my hands and take a bath before I eat. At least I do sometimes when I'm not in a hurry to get to dinner; which is most of the time. It is hard work mucking a stable and grooming reindeer you know."
"The defense rests," Toby muttered as he dried the dishes.
"Hey! I heard that!" the elf growled from the porch as he refilled their beer mugs.
Toby finished the dishes and went to the big fireplace to put a log on it, then sat back on the couch to relax. He picked up his book.
"Move the easy chairs out of the corner by the fireplace Toby and we'll decorate the Christmas tree," the elf called from the porch. "And don't start pouting. This won't take as long as you think. We can do the rest of the decorating tomorrow."
Toby crawled off the couch muttering to himself.
"Don't elves ever slow down? Must they constantly be doing something constructive all the time? And I wasn't pouting."
"I heard that! The answers are no, yes and yes you are."
Toby cleaned out the corner and turned as he heard the elf come in from the porch. The elf was carrying a ten foot long tube about two feet in diameter. The elf handed Toby the tube and it's weight brought the small man to his knees. The elf didn't seem to notice Toby's distress as he carefully centered a stand in the corner. He was measuring how far stand was from the walls when Toby dropped the tube. The resulting crash made the elf jump two feet in the air and turn in surprise.
"Why didn't you tell me you needed help," the elf cried as he ran over and picked up the tube. "It this thing had popped open there would be a hell of a mess in here."
"The fricking thing weighs a ton!" Toby gasped.
"Hardly Toby. It's less than two hundred pounds. There. Does that look about right?"
"For a ten foot mailing tube sitting on it's end in the corner of my cabin, yes. Why don't you push it back against the wall?"
"Come over hear and take one of these tassels and you'll find out," the elf chortled from the corner. He was rummaging near the bottom of the tube and pulled out an electrical cord and plugged it in. The elf handed Toby a tassel attached to the bottom of the tube and picked up the other one.
"Stretch the cord as far as possible, and when I say go, pull the tassel."
The elf counted him down and on 'Now' Toby pulled the tassel. It was like pulling the inflation cord on a life raft. Toby's yank pulled a strip from the tube from the bottom to it's top and saw a similar strip pulled from the other side as Glidden yanked on his tassel. There was a loud FRUUMP, and Toby stared at a fully decorated and lit Christmas tree. There had to be a thousand little colored lights amid the myriad of hanging glass balls and other decorations.
"That's impossible!"
"Not when you have the vacuum packer we have," the elf laughed.
"You humans use vacuum systems for mundane things like packing away sweaters and comforters and storing leftovers. We use them to pack up Christmas trees. Cool, ain't it?"
"Yeah, I guess. I think I'll sit down for a while. I'm not quite ready for decorated Christmas trees to pop out of packing tubes."
Toby stared in awe at the ten foot tree in the corner. The huge scotch pine was far prettier than any tree he'd ever seen. The huge thing fit the decor of the cabin perfectly. Glidden danced around the tree making minute adjustments to an ornament here and there on the tree. He skipped over to the fireplace and goaded it into a lively display. Toby continued to stare transfixed at the tree and the dancing fire beside it.
Glidden hopped on the couch and stuck his head next to Toby's so he had the same perspective Toby did.
"Perfect!" the elf breathed softly. Then he laughed.
"To make it even more perfect, I'm going to make us some hot chocolate. And I mean the real stuff."
The elf returned with two mugs of hot chocolate then disappeared. Toby heard him rummaging around in boxes on the back porch. The elf returned with a beautiful lacquered wooden box in one hand and a small box of Christmas tree balls in the other. He placed the boxes carefully on the sofa then climbed into Toby's lap and uncarefully squirmed his way into his friends arms. He picked up the box and opened it.
"Snorkel sent me my painting kit. He knows I like to add a 'personal' touch when I decorate a tree. I like Snorkel. He's a friend and not a lover. In fact he's married to one of the girl elves. They try like the blazes to make a baby, but probably won't be successful for a few hundred more years, but man do they try. Snorkel got his name because his nose is longer than his pecker. More flexible too sometimes."
The elf picked up one of the balls and studied it.
"Did you make the box Glidden? It's really very well done."
"Thanks Toby. All elves make their own tools. You went to school and college for book learning, elves go to school to learn how to make things and do things. I made this about seven hundred years ago when lacquered boxes were the rage in Europe." The elf opened a tiny jar of white paint and picked up a narrow brush. "What should I put on this one?" he asked as he picked up the first ball.
"How about the angels you put on the pope's clock?"
"Perfect!!!"
Toby watched as the little elf made quick sure strokes with is brush. The elf was concentrating hard on his project. His eyes were squinted and his tongue was sticking out the left side of his mouth as his nimble hands made the quick deft strokes. Out of the various strokes two forms were emerging. The elf worked rapidly and Toby watched as the various arcs and lines turned into two cherubs sucking on each other. Their faces mirrored intense pleasure and Toby suspected the elf painted the moment of their joint release just to thumb his nose at St. Peter. The cherubs' peckers were far larger than necessary.
"Artistic license," the elf muttered as if he sensed Toby's thought. The elf deftly turned the ball part way and Toby watched as the aerial duo reappeared on the ball. This time the two were copulating. The one doing the screwing had its face screwed up in concentration as it tried to please its lover. The one being screwed had an incredulous look of pleasure on its face.
"Was that the look Muley had when you porked him in front of Mrs. Claus?"
"Exactly!"
The elf turned the ball again and a image of the two cherubs sleeping happily in each other's arms emerged. Where the tone of the first two images had been erotic, this one was just plain sweet. Three different scenes of love were depicted on the ball; the one that affected Toby the most was the one where sex wasn't involved.
"Who were you thinking of when you did the last painting, Glidden? That image came from your heart, not your libido."
The elf didn't answer, but the ears turned a bright red. Toby ran a hand down the back of the elf's head and the ears got even brighter.
"You haven't found him either have you Glidden. You're an elf and I'm a human but we dream of the same thing. We dream of having that kind of happiness in our arms when we sleep at night."
"No Toby, we haven't found them yet. But one day, we will," the elf whispered.
"What will you do when you find him Toby? I could bring the man I truly loved here and we could spend the rest of our lives here in the mountains. Can you live together with another elf at the workshop."
"Yes, Toby. But only a few male elves make that kind of commitment to each other. For us, a lifetime commitment lasts eons. The grounds of the workshop are dotted with little cottages. When a couple want's to spend the rest of their lives together they go to Santa and let him look in their hearts. Santa sees the truth and he lets the pair see what he sees. If the commitment is still there after seeing the truth in the other's heart, they move out of the dorms and into a little cottage. One of these days, Toby, I'll stand before Santa with my true love's hand in mine and take him home to our cottage."
Toby hugged the elf to him.
"I know you will. Will I get an invite to the wedding?"
"One's best friend is always invited to a wedding, Toby."
The elf turned and gave Toby a hug and a kiss. Their hug and kiss of friendship probably didn't rise to the level of love, but since Toby had never been in love, he couldn't be sure. But the hug and kiss certainly said he'd found a true friend.
Toby awoke the next morning and reached out for the elf. Even though it was only their second night together, Toby already loved curling up with the tiny creature. When his hand didn't find Glidden, Toby sat up to locate the elf. He laughed as he heard the elf singing downstairs. The elf was clearly in the bathtub and singing as rude a song as Toby had ever heard. The small man laughed as he dressed and then went to the kitchen to start the coffee and breakfast. He found the coffee already made and took a cup to his happy little buddy.
Toby spent the next week in a daze. He was happy, productive and had the company of a true friend. They'd cleaned the cabin and polished his grandfather's furniture until it gleamed in the firelight. They'd broken up the bales of hay Neutrino dropped by daily and Toby had been delighted when one of this year's fawns had walked shyly up to him and nuzzled his out stretched hand before bounding back into the woods. They'd cleaned the workshop and the barn and tried to outdo each other with elaborate dinners. They'd skied and run over every inch of Toby's land and had even named all the yet to be born bear cubs. Every evening they'd sit on the couch and talk. The small man held the elf on his lap and let him regale Toby with stories from Santa's workshop. When the elf ran out of tales, they'd go to bed.
Toby was as happy as he'd ever been. He had a friend he loved far more than the erstwhile lovers of his past. Although sex was impossible for the pair, sex was far less important to Toby than friendship.
Toby and Glidden were drinking hot chocolate together when Toby realized what evening it was and gave a sudden sob.
"Tonight's Christmas eve. Tomorrow morning I'll have gotten my wish to spend Christmas with a true friend," he sobbed. "Tomorrow you'll go back to the north pole."
The elf turned sadly to his friend.
"Yes, I'll have to leave tomorrow. I wish it could be otherwise but it can't be. One of the things that makes your wish so precious is not only that it came true, but because the memories will be those you treasure for the rest of your life. You've changed Toby, for the better and I think I've changed too. You know what happiness is now and you've distinguished love from lust. You've had a true friend so now you know what to look for in others. I think I've learned the same thing Toby. I found a true friend and now I know how to recognize one. Our lives have changed for the better because of the time we've spent together."
"But if I had another Christmas wish to make, the wish would be that you and I could stay together. I'm going to miss you badly, Glidden."
"I'll miss you horribly too, Toby," the elf sobbed quietly along with the human.
For a long quiet moment the two just held each other as their hearts were broken at the thought of their parting. But friendship is stronger than grief and they realized that the grief would fade and the friendship would remain.
"Will you write to me Glidden?" Toby teased the elf though his tears.
The elf smiled though his. "Check your pocket Toby."
Toby reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of parchment. When he unfolded it he read.
"Yes, Toby, I promise I'll write."
"Scribble a message on it Toby," the elf laughed.
Toby did and Glidden reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of parchment. He unfolded it and showed it to Toby.
'And I promise I'll write back' was scribbled in Toby's handwriting on it.
"Better than e-mail," the small man laughed. "Faster too!"
The elf hopped off Toby's lap and dashed to the kitchen. He returned and Toby and he toasted each other silently as they sipped the last hot chocolate they'd ever share.
Toby sadly put his empty cup down and hugged the elf to him.
"Come on Toby," the elf whispered. "It's almost midnight. In another minute it will be Christmas day. Let's go out on the porch and welcome Christmas."
Toby picked the elf up and carried him out onto the front porch. It was a beautifully clear cold night. Toby had never seen the stars so bright and clear. Even without the moon Toby could see the ice on the pond. Somewhere under the snow was the small boat Toby had rowed around the pond. At times it was a pirate ship, a Viking long boat, a raft, or a schooner and he beached it on desert islands, or sailed into the distant harbors of his imagination.
But it was the sky to which Toby's eyes were drawn and to the North Star. Polaris seemed brighter than it ever had before. Toby had always thought it strange that such an important star was out shown by its neighbors. It wasn't outshone tonight. Polaris gleamed with a light that made the other stars pale. Toby wished upon the North Star, as he held the best friend he'd ever had. He wished fervently that Glidden would find the happiness and love he deserved. The wish turned into a prayer for the elf in his arms.
Toby was still looking at Polaris when Glidden laughed and kissed him.
"Wake up Toby, so we can go to bed."
"Will you be there when I wake up in the morning?" he whispered sadly.
"For a little while, my friend. For a little while," the elf answered as Toby carried him up to bed. Toby climbed in bed and pulled his best friend back against him. He snuggled up around the elf and was content.
Toby was startled abruptly out of a very nice dream.
"Yaaaaahooooooooo! Christmas Day is here!!!! And Santa's been here!" Glidden screamed in Toby's ear. "And I got my Christmas wish too. Not the way I expected, but that's why Santa's Santa and I'm a silly elf!!! Yaaahoooooooooo!"
Hands clamped down over Toby's eyes.
"Don't open your eyes, Toby. Not yet. Just keep your hands by your sides until I get back. Promise me Toby. Please! Don't move, I'll be right back. Promise you won't move."
Toby laughed at the eagerness and happiness in his friend's voice although all the screaming was giving him a headache.
"Promise Toby, please."
"OK, Glidden. I won't move, I promise."
"And you'll keep your hands by your side? Please."
"All right, I promise."
"Yaaaahooooo!" the elf screamed as he leapt off the bed. Toby heard the elf patter across the floor and start down the steps. There was a thump, thump, thump and a crash as the elf bounced down the steps and hit the bottom.
"Don't move Toby, you promised. I'm okay, I just need to walk it off," the elf moaned in pain.
Toby heard the elf move across the floor and start moving boxes.
"Here it is, Toby. It's what Santa left for us," the elf screamed as Toby heard him race for the stairs. Moments later Toby felt the elf bound up on the bed.
Toby felt the elf push him up in bed and felt something being laid on his lap.
"Just open your eyes and open the gift Santa left us. Don't look around Toby, just open the gift. Last night I wished upon the North Star that you'd find the happiness and love you needed in your life, and Santa granted it. What did you wish for Toby?"
"That you found the happiness and love you always wanted. Why?"
"Because Santa granted our wishes for each other, Toby. Open Santa's present."
Toby opened his eyes and looked at the little box on his lap. He had to laugh because Glidden was breathing down his neck. Toby looked at the tag.
"To Toby and Glidden, from Santa," he read.
Toby opened the box and found a small mirror inside. It was utterly plain and unadorned. Behind him Glidden hopped happily around on the bed.
"How thoughtful. A mirror," Toby laughed. The thought had started in his mind as a cynical remark but came out as a humorous comment.
"Look at yourself in the mirror, my love," the elf whispered.
Toby's heart skipped a beat. He didn't dare believe what his ears had told him. "My love?"
"Look in the mirror, Toby."
Toby looked. The same face he'd looked at for 28 years stared back at him. It was an average face framed by his long hair. The only difference was that his eyes looked a little brighter. Actually they sparkled. He turned the mirror slightly and froze. Two long pointed ears stuck up through his hair. He raised a hand to touch one ear and followed the graceful curve with a finger. Glidden plopped down next to him and put an arm around Toby's shoulder.
Toby started shaking. The arm around him was the same size as his own. It wasn't the small arm of an elf. Toby turned slowly and looked into the bright eyes of Glidden, the elf. But the happy eyes were at the same level as his own. Glidden raised a hand to brush Toby's cheek.
"You're an elf, Toby," Glidden said in wonder. "Santa made you an elf. Santa heard our wishes last night. We both wished for the other to find love and happiness. Santa looked at our hearts and saw the truth. Because we only wanted the other to be happy, he granted our wishes. The only way we'd both be happy is to be with each other. The only way that could happen was for him to make you an elf."
Toby looked at the elf in shock. Glidden leaned forward and kissed Toby. Friendship flooded into Toby through the kiss. The flood of friendship turned into a torrent of something else. With a happiness he'd never known, Toby realized it was love. Toby shyly returned Glidden's kiss. Then his happiness and love flooded out of him and into Glidden.
The two fell back on the bed as they hugged and kissed each other with all their new found love. Glidden broke the kiss with a shy laugh. The elfin Toby gave the same shy laugh.
"Come on Toby, we need to get cleaned up. Our ride will be here soon. It's going to be a glorious Christmas morning in an hour, and we need to be gone from here by then. Santa laid our cloths out down stairs. That mean's he wants us on our way to the Workshop quickly."
Glidden blushed brightly and reached a shy, tentative hand out to touch Toby's elf sized dick. Toby was shocked to feel himself shiver at the loving touch and turned a shy eye to his friend. Glidden leaned forward to kiss Toby lightly but the love raced through the gentle kiss.
"I wouldn't worry too much honey. We won't need the clothes for long. I hope our cottage has a well stocked kitchen. I don't plan coming out of it until next Christmas."
Glidden towed his dazed lover gently down the stairs and dressed him in green leggings and a brown tunic. Toby gathered up the few small things he considered priceless and put them in a small pouch. The pictures of his family's happy times at the cabin were the first things he stuffed in the pouch. No matter what Toby picked, the pouch never filled up and never got any heavier. When Toby turned to take a last sad look at his cabin, Glidden stood at his side with an arm around his shoulder. But Toby was now an elf. Elves could feel sadness, but not for long. Their sense of humor and lust for happiness overruled the darker emotions.
Glidden laughed as he pulled a jaunty little hat on Toby's head and laughed as he pulled the new elf out the door. Toby found himself laughing as well.
Toby stopped on the porch to look out into the pre-dawn. A small sleigh with a couple reindeer was parked on the snow. The little heard of deer were all watching him from one side of the path and rabbits and squirrels watched from the other. As Toby stepped from the porch he stopped to touch the nose of the large buck.
"This is all yours and the other animals' now. I don't think I'll be coming back."
The buck gave a soft snort and turned and led the small herd back to the trees.
"Don't worry, Toby. Santa always takes care of the details. He heard you give your gift to the animals. For as long as there is a Santa this will be safe haven for them."
Hand in hand the two elves walked to the sleigh.
"About time, you two," Neutrino laughed gaily. "Hop in the back. I brought plenty of blankets and a thermos of hot chocolate. It's going to be such a pretty morning, I think I'll take the scenic route back to the Workshop. It will give you boys time to get a little more aquatinted with each other. I love the scenic route so I'm sure I won't hear or see anything."
Glidden and Toby climbed into the sleigh. They weren't even settled when the sleigh lurched into the air tossing Glidden and Toby into a heap on the floor.
"Neutrino!" Glidden scolded with a laugh as he grabbed a blanket to pull it over his new lover.
"Just a part of the service, Glidden," the elf laughed as the sleigh lurched again, tossing Glidden on top of Toby.
Glidden covered them both with the blanket.
"Told you we wouldn't need the clothes for long," Glidden laughed softly.
The laugh turned sultry as the elf's hands started undressing his partner. Toby began the process of undressing his lover at the same time.
"I hope this trip takes a while," Toby whispered to his lover as he kissed the rigid dick in front of him.
"I'm sure it will, I've known Neutrino for a long time. He's a lousy driver, but he's a hopeless romantic. Now stop talking Toby the elf, and stick your favorite tool where the sun never shines."
Their kiss was passionate as was the love they shared. It turned out to be a very long and horribly exhausting ride to the workshop.
When Neutrino gently pulled the blanket up at the stable he saw the two elves sleeping arm in arm with the happiest looks on their faces the elf had ever seen. They looked like two little angels lying there. He reached out and picked up a Christmas tree ball lying near the snoozing pair. He looked at the angels sleeping on the ball and the intertwined elves in the sleigh, laughed to himself and placed the ball next to the sleeping couple. Neutrino covered the exhausted lovers with the blanket and quietly unhitched the reindeer. He'd put the sleigh away a little later.