I would just like to start out by thanking all those who have stuck with my throughout these chapters. I know the ending of the last chapter left many of you hot and bothered and not in a good fun way, but I am thankful that you still wanted me to continue. Keep giving me feedback, and to the few critics, if you don't like these stories, then screw you, they were never meant for you anyway.
The words of Devin's roomate rang in my head for hours. Spending the weekend with his girlfriend? With his girlffiend? his girlfriend? girlfriend? GIRLFRIEND? girl girl girl girlfriend?
WHAT is Devin with a GIRLFRIEND? Why is the guy that I went out on a date with just LAST NIGHT, visiting a girlfriend? Why did Devin ask another boy out on a date, if he has a GIRLFRIEND? And why have I suddenly had to re-determine my sexual orientation, for a guy who has a.... Well, you get the picture.
Alena said it was just a lesson for me that all men are pigs. I found less humor in her joke than she intended. I guess its funnier when the guy you are dating doesn't have a girlfriend. Luckily for me, Jared was out on another of his wild nights, so I didn't have to hide my emotions like I would if he was around.
couldn't watch any TV because it was all sappy romance movies and the like. It's not something you want to see when you just found out something like I did. It occured to me that I was the other man. If Devin had a girlfriend, he was cheating on her with me. I mean, of course sex hadn't entered the picture at all but was Devin trying to make me into his mistress? what do you call a male mistress? a mister? I suddenly felt so cheap.. not to mention stupid.
I eventually drove myself to exhaustion thinking about the situation, and finally I just went to sleep. Jared never came home that night and so I wasn't awakened untill Sunday afternnoon, when the phone rang.
"Hello?"
"Cameron?" It was a pretty familiar voice.
"Yeah?"
"It's me.. Devin" I knew it.
"What do YOU want?"
"We need to talk"
"Yes, we do need to talk. You, me, and your GIRLFRIEND"
"Just... please.. can I just come over and talk?"
"I guess."
I wasn't nearly as excited to see Devin this time as I had two nights earlier when he came to pick me up for our date. Afterall, at the time it was my first time being on a date with a guy. A guy I had THOUGHT was available. Now I find out, not only is he in a relationship, it's not even with another guy. It didn't take him too long to come over though.
I buzzed him up, and he met me at my door. I really wanted to smack him, and yet, I also really wanted to kiss him. I restrained both desires and I stepped back to let him in. I didn't say a word to him. I just looked at him, waiting for an explanation.
"you look nice today" he said. I looked like crap actually, I had only been up since he called, and I was still wearing the clothes from yesterday.
"Spare me the small talk Devin and tell me what you came here to say."
"I suppose you deserve that. To defend him, Nate had no idea you and I had been on a date, and he wouldn't have told you like that if he knew. Also, I should have called you myself and told you, I guess I didn't think that you would call me. Yes, Cameron, I do have a girlfriend, and I've had a girlfriend since my sophmore year of high school. At least, I did untill about a month ago."
"A month ago?" I added, not quite understanding.
"Yes, last month She broke up with me, mostly because she didn't think she could trust me, since I'm living the free life at college and she's just a high school senior. When she dumped me, I became very upset, because I really cared about her and I had no desire to hurt her. After she dumped me, I didn't want to be alone, but every girl I saw made me think of Her. Soon, when I was jerking it, I started to think of guys. It wasn't long before I was scanning the internet for pictures of male on male action. I was projecting my sadness of my breakup into sexual disorientation. Then I saw you at that party and something just clicked inside of me. I desired you. A lot."
"So you were just using me?"
"Well I didn't think of it like that.. I mean, I didn't just try to nail you or anything, I DID take you out for a romantic evening. I really did have fun friday night. I wanted to do it again, I thought about you all the way home. Then when I got home, She called.
"and you forgot all about me?"
"Well... yes. I know it sounds cruel, but I did. She means so much to me and when she called she told me how much she missed me. She didn't want to be alone, she wanted me back. I went home this weekend to be with her. I love her Cameron."
"Fine. Be with her, but get the fuck out of my dorm."
"I'm sorry Cam... I'm really sorry..."
"Don't you call me Cam."
He nodded his head and leaned in to kiss me on the cheek, but I stopped him.
"You're a sweet guy Cameron. I hope the right guy or girl comes along and gives you the happiness I denied you..."
"get out."
He left. And I collapsed on the floor, crying. I buried my head into my knees, and I just couldn't take it. He had just used me. Used me to hide his lonliness of his girlfriend dumping him. THAT was what I had come out of the closet to myself for? I had already been used by girls, now guys were going to do it too?
I was crying so hard that I hadn't noticed Jared come in.
"Hey Cam... what's wrong?"