Hey all, I'm back and ready to write again. It's been such a long time, I've had to re-read the story to try to remember what my next plot was going to be.
Now on with the story.
First of all, let me just say that this is my first time writing any kind of fiction like this.
DISCLAIMER: This is a work of total fiction and is not meant to imply anything about the sexualities of Nick and Drew Lachey or anyone else mentioned in this story.
If you are too young to read this, or if Homosexuality offends you, then please don't continue any further and leave.
Other 98 Degrees stories I'd like to recommend are.
"Give Me Just One Night" by Unanoche. "69 with Jeff Timmons" by Zachary Scott Pritt "Nick Lachey" by Ken. "98 Degrees Is Hot" by Gay Night "The Reunion" by RinSong. "Loving Nick Lachey" by Jordan
and finally: "This Gift" by Sprout
Now, I"ll let you get on with the story.
Enjoy.
Previously on "My Everything".....
I took off my clothes and shoes until I was in nothing but my boxerbriefs and socks. I climbed into my bed and crawled underneath the covers.
It was then that the loneliness that I was feeling now that I was in bed alone really hit me. I started crying, knowing that Nick was going to be upset with me for leaving. But I couldn't just go back. I had to figure things out. Even if it meant risking everything that I had with Nick.
I didn't think that it was fair for me to have to keep Nick in the dark about what I was going through.
I then asked myself: "Do I trust Nick? I mean REALLY trust him?"
After all, that was the most important part of any relationship. Trust. Without trust, it won't survive.
And with Drew still in love with me, my invalid marriage, and lying to Nick about it, I wasn't liking the answer I was coming up with.
I couldn't think anymore and I ended up crying myself to sleep.
******************************************************* NICK'S HOUSE, THE NEXT MORNING...............
Drew awoke to the sound of sobbing coming from Nick's room. Someone was crying.
Concerned, Drew got out of bed and walked over to Nick's room, where the door was open.
He glanced in and saw Nick sitting on his bed, crying his eyes out. Drew noticed that he was holding a piece of paper in his hands.
"Nick?"
Nick looked up and saw Drew standing in his doorway, staring at him with concern in his eyes.
"Nick, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" Drew asked. He then looked around the room and noticed that Sean wasn't there.
"And where is Sean?" Drew also asked.
Nick's lower lip trembled as he swallowed and tried to get out the words:
"He left me, Drew." Nick sobbed. "He left all of us."
Drew was shocked at this news. "Are you sure?" He asked, holding his hand to his chest.
Nick then held out the piece of paper, that he was holding, to Drew.
"Read it, Bro." Nick said, as Drew accepted the paper.
Drew noticed it was written in Sean's handwriting. He then started reading it.
When he had finished, he also had tears in his eyes. He then sat down beside Nick and pulled Nick into his arms.
"Nick, I'm so sorry, Bro." Drew said. "I can't believe it's come to this. And it might be my fault."
Nick let go of Drew with a confused scowl on his face.
"Why would it be your fault, Drew?" Nick asked him.
Drew took a deep breath.
"Nick, there's something I need to tell you..........
********** CHAPTER 46 **********
THE NEXT MORNING AT THE SPA...............
I woke up to a day that the sun wasn't shining for once. I guess it matched my mood. The day seemed as unhappy as I was.
I got up out of bed and headed to the bathroom to do my business and get ready for the day ahead of me.
I turned on the shower, getting the water to the right temperature, and stepped in to get washed up.
I stood under the water, letting the warmth of it relax my tired body. I wet my hair and grabbed the shampoo. I squeezed some out into my hand and worked it into my hair and scalp.
When I was finished, I stepped under the shower head and let the water rinse the shampoo out of my hair.
As I rinsed, closing my eyes, my mind drifted back to Nick, wondering if he was up yet and if he'd found my letter.
My heart was breaking for what I knew Nick would be going through right now. But I wasn't yet ready to face him. I wasn't sure when I would be, but I did know that he and I couldn't go on this way for long. Lots of questions needed to be answered and decisions needed to be made.
Decisions that would determine our future.
******************************************************* LATER, BACK AT NICK'S HOUSE.....................
"Well, guys, are we all in agreement for what needs to be done where Sean is concerned?" Nick asked, everyone in the room. "When I say your name, you give me an agree or a disagree."
"Drew?" Nick asked, looking at his brother for confirmation, a look of sadness and hurt in his eyes.
Drew nodded. "Agreed." He said, sadly.
Nick turned to the next person. "Justin?"
"Agreed." Justin said.
"Kandi?"
"Agreed" She said.
"Jeff?"
"Agreed." He said.
Then all eyes were on Danny, for his answer ******************************************************* AT THE SAME TIME THAT DAY, BACK AT THE SPA..............
I felt totally refreshed when I got back to my room. I had gotten a massage, taken a yoga session, a mudbath, and last but not least, a meditation session in the meditation room alone.
The meditation had helped more than everything else since I'd had a chance to think about things and I finally had my answers about what I needed to do and I made a decision.
I'd decided that I no longer cared about whether or not Nick and I were legally married. Just having him by my side should have been enough than by me being shattered over a marriage that wasn't legal on paper. It may not have been legal, but Nick and I did take vows and we'd made a commitment.
As far as I was concerned, Nick was my husband in every way and a piece of paper couldn't change that. I needed to go back home to my sexy husband.
My thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of my cellphone. I walked over to the bedside table and picked it up.
"Hello?" I asked.
"Hello, Sean." I heard Nick's voice say. I could tell he was really upset.
"Hi sexy." I said. "I'm so sorry that I had to leave. I know you must have been upset."
"That's an understatement." Nick said, in a tonal voice. "I can't go on like this anymore. I need you back here today."
"No problem, baby." I said. "I'm on my way home right now. I have so much to tell you."
"I'll bet you do." Nick said. "Be here within the hour. I'll be waiting."
"Alright." I said. " I love you."
After I said that, I heard the phone hang up. I frowned as I put my phone away and grabbed my suitcase to go downstairs to check out.
After checking out and paying the bill for only 1 night, I walked to my car and put my bags into the trunk of the car and shut it.
I got into my car and started driving home to Nick's house. On my way, I couldn't stop thinking about the fact that Nick didn't tell me he loved me back and hung up on me instead. I was even more determined to set things right with him.
I just hoped I wasn't too late...........
After about 30 minutes, I pulled into the driveway to Nick's house and shut off the engine.
I jumped out of the car and ran towards the house, forgetting about my suitcase in the trunk.
I opened the door and walked inside.
"Nick, baby, I'm home!" I announced as I walked towards the living room.
When I got to the doorway to the living room, I saw Nick, Drew, Jeff, Danny, Justin, and Kandi all sitting in the living room, looking up at me.
And they did not look happy to see me.
Nick got up off of the couch and came over to me. He just stood there for a long while, just looking at me, his eyes full of emotion. Then he slowly put his arms around me and hugged me.
I held onto him tight. It felt great to be back in his arms again.
"I'm so glad to be back home." I said as he released me.
As I looked up into his eyes, I noticed that he still wasn't even smiling. I could see the sadness in his eyes.
"Where did you go?" Nick asked, flatly.
"To "Cloud Nine." I told him. "It's a Spa about 30 minutes from here up towards the mountains."
Nick just nodded. Then he looked at me, his eyes demanding answers.
"Do you care to tell us now why you took off and left like that?" He asked me.
I wasn't sure where to start, so I just decided to start from the beginning.
"Alright." I said. "It all started with a phone call that day that I got on my cellphone.......
"And you said that it was someone trying to sell you something." Justin said, interrupting me.
"And that was your first lie." Nick said, looking angry now.
"Yes, Nick, and I'm so sorry for that." I said. "The call was really from someone who could be stalking you. Maybe even me."
Nick just nodded. "Go on." He said.
I then proceeded to Drew's outburst.
"Then, Drew had that outburst later and he stormed up to his room." I said, looking over at Drew, who looked away when I met his eyes.
"Then I left and you went up to talk to him to see what was wrong." Nick put in. "What did he tell you?"
I was really starting to get uncomfortable now. I didn't want to get into what Drew had told me. I tried to talk my way around it.
"That doesn't matter now." I said. "But what you really need to know is after Drew and I talked, he went to take a shower and while he was in it, I got a call that changed everything for you and me." I found out something that devastated me so much that I passed out by the bedside table afterwards.
Everyone was shocked when they heard that. Nick turned to his brother for confirmation.
Drew, is this true?" Nick asked him, looking a little worried.
Drew nodded.
"Yes." He said to Nick. "I found him lying on the floor after I got out of the shower. When I finally got him to come to, he tried to lie and tell me that it was nothing, but I didn't believe him."
Nick's face then turned back to me.
"And that's when you told him about the stalker who called on your cellphone earlier."
I nodded.
"Wait a minute!" Jeff said, frowning at me. "You said you lied about someone trying to sell you something when you got that call on your cellphone. If it was actually the stalker, then who called the house phone?"
I swallowed, starting to choke up a little bit, knowing that this was going to be a devestation revelation.
"It was a minister named Rev. Jace from the wedding chapel in Vermont where Nick and I got married." I told Jeff. "He said he had bad news for Nick and me."
Here, Nick frowned. "What did he say?" He asked me.
"He told me that the minister who married us was a fraud." I said, as tears came to my eyes. "Do you realize what that means, Nick?"
Everyone was stunned beyond words. They could not believe what I was telling them.
"It means that you and I are not.........really married." Nick asked, as tears of hurt and anger formed in his eyes.
"And that's why you passed out." Kandi finished for me.
I could only nod, since the tears were coming full force, causing my eyes to close.
When I opened my eyes, I saw that Nick was really mad now.
"And not once did you feel you could come to me with this?" Nick asked, shaking his head, as a tear made it's way down his face.
I hung my head in shame.
"I was your husband, Sean!" Nick said, sharply. "I had a right to know about this too! But you decided to keep all of this to yourself and not be honest about it!"
"Nick, I'm sorry!" I sobbed. "I knew that I'd have to look into your eyes and break your heart and I couldn't do it! I couldn't bear to see that look on your face! Just like the one I'm seeing right now!"
Nick turned his back to me and looked at Drew.
"See Bro." He said to Drew. "He lied to both you and me. How can you still be in love with him when all he's done is lie!"
My heart stopped at that moment. Nick knew about Drew's feelings for me?! How did he find out?
"Nick, how do you know that?" I asked him.
Drew looked up at me. "I told him everything, Sean." He said, sadly.
"Drew, how could you do that to me?" I asked him, horrified.
"Don't you dare blame this on Drew!" Nick yelled. "At least he was honest about his feelings!
I couldn't believe Nick was defending him.
"You're actually defending him?!" I asked in disbelief. "Did he happen to tell you that he was the one who made the moves on me?"
"Yes, He told me that too!" Nick said, sharply. "At least he was man enough to admit what he'd done. You, on the other hand, have some growing up to do!"
Now I was starting to get mad.
"What the hell are you talking about, Nick?" I scoffed, annoyed.
"Listen to me, Sean!" Nick said, his voice getting louder. "You want to be a man? You need to start being honest with me, and stop second guessing yourself every time my brother opens his mouth!" Otherwise, Sean, you're no man at all! You're an adolescent, immature boy! And that sure the hell is not the kind of husband I want!"
Nick turned away, leaving me to process those hurtful words.
"What are you saying, Nick?" I asked him, quietly.
Nick turned back to me, his expression stony cold.
"After Drew told me everything this morning, He and I talked and came to a decision together. The rest of the guys support me on this."
I didn't know what he was talking about, but whatever it was, I knew that I wasn't going to like it.
"What is it, Nick?" I asked, slowly.
Nick turned away and motioned the guys, and Kandi to stand up, which they did.
"We all decided that it would be best if you weren't a part of our lives anymore." Nick said. "As far as I'm concerned, you and I are finished."
"No, Nick, you can't mean that!" I sobbed, walking over to him and throwing my arms around him.
"Come on, I know I screwed up, big time, but I came back didn't I?" I continued. "I came back because I love you and I want to make things right with us."
Nick didn't hug me. Instead, he pulled my arms from around his neck and pushed me away.
"I don't want you to contact me again, and I don't ever want to see you again." Nick said, coldly.
"Drew, talk some sense into him, will you?" I whimpered.
Drew walked over and stood in front of me. He shook his head.
I'm sorry, Sean, I can't do that." Drew said. "After I saw what Nick was going through this morning when he found out you'd left, I knew right then and there that I was not willing to lose my brother for you. You're not worth it. I realized that if you could hurt Nick like that, you could do the same thing to me if I was in his shoes. So I think it would be best if you left and never looked back."
I didn't get to object, because Jeff stepped in next.
"We thought we knew you, Sean." Jeff said, sadly. "The Sean Perry I knew had class, integrity, and self respect. Obviously, you're not the man we all thought you were."
"How can you say that to me, Jeff?!" I shouted at him, in between sobs. "Have you forgotten that I helped you out during the worst time of your life when Danny treated you the way that he did?! Hell, if it wasn't for my accident, you two wouldn't even be together!"
"And I will always be grateful to you for everything that you've done for me." Jeff said.
"Well, you have a pretty fucked way of showing it!" I snarled.
"Sean, come on, calm down." Danny said. I just gave him a dirty look.
"Calm down?!" I screamed. "My life is being changed forever by all of you and you're telling me to calm down?!"
Danny didn't say anything. Neither did anyone else. That is until I turned back to Nick.
"Nick, please, don't do this." I begged him.
"Dont do this?" Nick sarcastically asked. "I didn't do anything. You're the one who left.
"Damn it, Nick!" I swore. "Don't you understand that I had to leave?!"
"No, I don't." Nick said. "I don't because you DIDN'T have to leave. You could have come to me and we could have talked about it and worked it out. And as for our marriage, It's not like we couldn't have gotten married again. But now, I have to wonder if that's what I even want anymore."
I turned away from Nick and looked towards the door. As I did, something caught my eye.
"What's my other suitcase doing there?" I asked outloud, more to myself, than to anyone else.
"I packed the rest of your stuff earlier today." Nick said, coldy. "Because I want you out of my life tonight!"
I whipped around and looked at him, noting the seriousness in his voice.
All I could do was look at everyone else, even Danny, and notice that they all were definitely in agreement.
"What about you, Danny?" I asked him. "Are you really going to give up the best friend that you ever had? I always thought that's what I was to you."
Danny shook his head.
"No, Sean, I'm not going to abandon you." Danny said. "Even though everyone else agreed that you shouldn't be here anymore, I wasn't about to break all ties with you. So, look at it this way. At least Nick, and the rest of us still care about you enough to let you have at least one person in your life still."
Danny hung his head.
"I just won't get to see you much anymore." He said, sadly.
"Why? What do you mean?" I asked, my voice cracking.
"Well, I love Jeff very much and I don't want to give up what we have, even if I think that this is a bit extreme what they're doing to you. So, it's looks like I'll be staying here in L.A. with Jeff."
I stood there, staring at Danny for the longest time. Then I wrapped my arms around him.
"I'm gonna miss you, man." I told him, as I cried on his shoulder.
"I know." He said, softly. I'm going to miss you too."
I released him, and gave Jeff a sad look.
"Despite your harsh words, Jeff, I still want you to be happy. So you take care of him, you got that?"
Jeff nodded.
"You can count on that." He said, putting his arm around Danny.
I nodded to him and then walked back to Justin and Kandi, who had not said anything.
"I wish you two nothing but the best, despite everything. I just hope you two will always be happy." I told them.
Justin smiled. "Thanks, Sean."
"We will be happy." Kandi said. "Don't worry about us. I'm just sorry that things couldn't have worked out differently for you and Nick."
"So am I." I whispered, as I hugged her.
I released her and wiped at my eyes. I turned back and was face to face with Drew. I gave him an angry look.
"I will never forget this, Drew!" I snarled. "Not as long as I live! As far as I'm concerned, this is all your doing! You couldn't stand to see me and Nick happy could you? No, you just had to go and tell Nick your feelings for me, but it wasn't because Nick was hurt by my leaving, it was because you rather would have seen him miserable than with me!"
The look on Drew's face was too much for me to bear. It was like my words had no effect on him.
"You can think whatever you want, Sean." Drew said, his voice so calm, it was almost eerie. "If that's how you think I am, than you don't know me at all."
"You're right." I said, angrily. "I don't know you."
Then I brushed past him to see Nick just looking at me coldly.
"Just know this, Nick." I told him. "I'm not giving up on us. Do you hear me? No way. Because I love you too much!"
Nick looked down to the floor.
"Look, Sean, I would love nothing more than to get past this."
Here, he looked up into my eyes.
"But I don't know if it's possible. Not the way I feel now."
I looked away, not wanting to look in his eyes again. I knew that if I did, I would break down.
"I know that isn't what you want to hear, Sean, but that's the way it is." He said.
I walked past him and picked up my suitcase and opened the door, ready to step out. But not before I looked back at Nick for the last time.
I set my suitcase down and walked back over to Nick and kissed him with everything I had, as two tears ran down my face.
After a few seconds, Nick returned it, just as passionately. But we were broke apart way too soon, as my emotions were starting to get the better of me. I was about to break down at any moment.
"I will wait for you as long as it takes, Nick." I said, trying to keep my voice steady. "I hope that once you've had time to really think about what you're doing, you'll come to realize that this is not what you want. And when you do, I'll be waiting for you!"
I picked up my suitcase and looked at Nick one last time.
"You are my everything!"
Those were my last words before I walked out that door and shut it behind me.
I walked out to the car and threw my suitcase in the back of my SUV, and hopped into the driver's seat.
I started the engine and drove off, sobbing the entire time, knowing that things would never be the same again.
"I'm never going to stop loving you, Nick." I sobbed to myself. "I will love you until the day I die."
TBC............?
Well, that's about it for this installment.
"Will Nick and the rest of the gang really be able to live with their decision. Or will their guilt eventually win out?
But the big question is....................
"What will become of Sean now? Will he be able to survive without love?
I can't tell you what you want to know, but I will tell you this...........Sean will no longer be the man he used to be.
Be prepared as this story continues with a new beginning.
Sean will change into a whole new person with a new outlook on life.
Stay tuned.
Slpwriter