This story is a work of fiction. All characters, real and fictional, are used without their or their creators' consent. I want to thank everyone who followed this story. This epilogue is my way of getting around my own feelings of inadequacy for this story. My thanks to JKR for FINALLY releasing Order of the Phoenix. JUNE, JUNE, JUNE!!!!
I flared with pain, and allowed the remainder of my power to flood through me, letting me merge with the statue. As I felt myself sink into the stone, I felt its reassuring strength surround me as we flowed and changed together. I had only a moment to realize the new shape I had attained-a phoenix looking down, crouched protectively over the two volumes under its talons-before I felt a pulling sensation. I could not resist, and before long, I saw the room vanish into a white light brighter than the sun.
My eyes were closed, and I was lying on my back. With my eyes closed, I could see through the eyes of that statue, and I managed to see the others, teary-eyed, depart from the Inner Sanctum of the Chamber. I shifted uncomfortably, and my body chastised me by exploding in pain.
That shifted me back to my current, and quite strange, situation. The bright light still shone through my eyelids, which were closed as tightly as I could. -What is going on-I wondered. -Why do I still have a body? Do I?-
I felt my hair brushing against my forehead thanks to a soft breeze. I kept my eyes closed, but my senses began to return. The breeze was slightly cool, and I noticed it was rather sweet-scented. I was lying on something giving, but not soft that itched my bare skin ever so slightly. That thought took a moment to sink in. Bare skin?! I was bare everywhere. I felt the breeze along my entire body! What shocked me even more, however, was that my ears caught a humming chorus around me. I tried to pinpoint the source, but it seemed to surround me, and it penetrated through me, filling me with a wonder and a joy that I'd never experienced before. I felt at peace, and certainly not embarrassed about my current state.
-This must be Heaven-I thought.
I lay back, still fighting the overly bright light and listened to the chorus, which slowly developed lyrics. In haunting, almost frightening minor chords, the words came, accompanied by wind chimes. The words gave me hope, yet filled me with fear.
"Let all mortal flesh keep silence
and with fear and trembling stand.
As the Light of light descendeth
from the realm of endless day
that the powers of Hell may vanish
as the darkness clears away.
He has come home..."
I shivered under the intensity of that last line, which echoed into the higher ranges and beyond as a poignant solo.
"Welcome, Matthew," a familiar voice said to me. Startled, I sat upright, and the light blinding me dimmed somewhat-enough for me to open my eyes. I saw that the light had been the sun, and that I was lying on a grass-covered green hillock. I stared around. Elves wearing white and silver stood around me, all smiling at me in welcome.
It had been they who'd been singing. I mentally smacked my forehead. I should've known.
I stood and began looking for who'd spoken to me. As I began to spin, I bumped into the Lady herself-Titania, the Queen of Light. She was dressed in a blindingly white gown, with her long hair hanging over her shoulders and halfway down her front. Her large eyes stared at me, and I blushed, realizing that I was naked. I moved my hands down to cover me, though I couldn't do so covertly.
The Lady held her left hand out to the side, and an attendant handed her a small bundle. This, in turn, she handed to me. My hands didn't leave my front, and she smiled at me, amused. She opened the bundle, unraveling a robe nearly as white as her gown. It glimmered in the sunlight as though made of metal cloth and she held it open in front of me. I quickly slid into the robe and pulled it shut, surprised at how soft and comfortable the material was. The belt seemed to be made of the same material, but had cloth-of-gold at the edges.
"Is your modesty assuaged," she asked me, her eyes twinkling with mirth.
I performed my most courtly bow. "It is, my Lady. Thank you for the consideration. I apologize for my..." I hesitated, searching for a word. "...ignominious state."
"Walk with me for a moment, Matthew," she asked. Though it wasn't voiced exactly as a question, since she knew I would follow, I nodded and moved to her left.
She turned and strolled down the hill, leaving the entourage behind.
"I was quite worried about you, you know," she said casually. "I'd thought you'd fall to the darkness."
"I did," I admitted ruefully. "I did some awful things."
"But you recovered and acquitted yourself."
"Perhaps. But as I seem to have...died? in the process, I find it rather difficult to be so certain."
"Yes, well. About why you are here." She paused momentarily, gathering her thoughts.
"You impressed me on your last visit here, and Chiron assures me you knew a great deal about our kingdom before you had met any of us. I found it strange and looked into you a little more."
"You were the one who sent the dream," I blurted intuitively.
She smiled softly. "I did. Though I couldn't clearly see your past, your future was laid out before me. Though it had two variations, depending on your decisions. I tried to give you guidance toward the right path, to give you hope."
"I flubbed it," I confessed.
"Perhaps, but it was not entirely your fault. However, as I watched you, I developed certain suspicions. Finally, after consulting many of our older books and grimoires, I discovered that my suspicions were indeed correct."
I looked at her. "My Lady?"
"You, my dear, are one of us. You always were. It explains your knowledge, it explains your power, and it explains how you were able to open the doorway in the first place."
I stopped, frozen in place. My mind was reeling. What was she saying? What did she mean?? "One of you?"
As we talked, we walked down the hill along a path made of white sand. The path moved down the edge of the hill, becoming steeper as it traversed its way down toward the beach. It gradually became the only safe path down the steep cliff that separated the woods from the shore. We moved down its smooth conduit until we reached the beach itself: a glimmering white expanse met with the constant rhythm of the azure waves as the sun shone down. The scene would be forever etched in my memory. We moved over the warm, smooth sand, neither of us leaving so much as a footprint behind us. Along the cliff wall to my right, sea-birds made their nests, and the air was filled with the sounds of their cries.
A shadow passed over us, and I quickly glanced to the sky. A roc soared overhead, its huge body blotting out the sun. It let out a single, respectful cry as it passed overhead, and Titania nodded her head, acknowledging its homage.
We walked along the beach in silence, until the Lady pointed me to a cave set against the cliff base. As we approached, I noticed the walls were smooth and rounded. The floor was cold sand, and a dim light filtered through. Though I couldn't see much detail inside, I could see enough not to stumble. Titania led me back perhaps twenty or thirty yards until the cave rounded into a hemispherical chamber. I looked around, wondering why she'd brought me here. The walls and ceiling glittered like the night sky around me-each star a gem set into the walls.
In the center of the chamber, a pillar stood. It was circular and had been hollowed out to resemble a birdbath. It stood full of water. "Come," she offered to me. "Come and see."
I looked into the bowl. She passed her hand over the water, and it began to glow. "This pool shows the true past-even that which had been hidden," she explained. "It is how I found you, after so many years of searching. Now, Matthew, you must look into the well to see your true past."
I hesitated, wondering what past she meant. Had my life been a lie? Why wouldn't I remember it? I squelched those thoughts and peered into the light. For a moment, it glowed a solid white before showing me a great battle. I saw Oberon leading an army of the various inhabitants of Avalon against a host of dark creatures. I knew immediately that this was one of the battles against the Unseelie Court. Though I couldn't see her, I knew the Queen of Air and Darkness wouldn't be far away. Strangely enough, however, it appeared that some few humans had joined battle with the Elven army and fought against the dark creatures. Then the image faded.
It reappeared a moment later, but this time showed the army of Avalon engaged in a war against the humans. Though I knew this was long, long ago, the humans outnumbered the Faerie by several times. And though their magic would have evened the odds, Titania forbade its usage, lest a cataclysm occur. Some members of the army broke off: Centaurs and unicorns, leprechauns, sprites and mermaids. But only a few, and they were scattered. The rest of the army was driven to the shore by the encroaching humans. Oberon, Titania and two others stood at the beach behind the army. I leaned in to see, and the image sharpened. One of the figures was Puck. The other was of like face, with white-blond hair and deep green eyes. The four of them joined hands and a large, shimmering vortex appeared behind the Court. Oberon, Titania and Puck leapt through, followed immediately by as much of the army as possible. The fourth caster held out his hands and a shimmering wall kept the humans away so the Faerie could retreat.
Finally, he stood alone on the beach. He looked around sadly, sighed, and lowered his arms. Then he stepped through the vortex. As he did so, it vanished with a flash. The mystified humans muddled around for a while, then moved their own separate ways.
"It is sad," Titania said, "how we rendered such aid to the humans, and yet were driven away from them: forced to make Avalon our only refuge. What once had been our private getaway became our prison." She sighed.
Mutely, I nodded.
The image faded and returned. I somehow knew that centuries of time had passed since the mythical creatures fled to Avalon. The image centered on a boy-perhaps twelve or thirteen. He sat on a rock overlooking the ocean from atop a cliff. I gasped. He looked so...familiar somehow. He had dark hair-so dark it was almost black-and sea-green eyes. His eyes were already so much wiser than his years, and he was already a very attractive boy. I couldn't help but feel that in a year or so, that boy would be absolutely gorgeous. Titania smiled at the expression on my face. "Watch," she ordered softly. Suddenly it snapped. He looked just like Harry! Aside from the bright green eyes, they looked so much alike, they could have been twins! Fascinated, I stared intently.
After a moment, the boy's expression changed from wistful to shocked as a swirling white vortex appeared in the air in front of him. Out of it stepped the young elf I'd seen before. He stopped and the two of them spoke, the dark-haired boy with an awed look on his face.
The images flashed by quickly, then. The elf, who clearly lusted after the boy-at least to my eyes, began to teach him magic. It began with simple cantrips, but progressed quickly. I watched the human grow older, though the elf remained the same. When the human was perhaps sixteen, I saw the two of them embrace, and then appear in post-coital bliss together. As they lay there, I saw the elf move his hands in a pattern, which I recognized. I couldn't help but gape. That was the mantle spell! What the hell? The human tried many times, but it apparently took a few years before he mastered its complex magic.
Time continued to pass, and I saw the human grow older. His hair became silvery, and he grew a beard. Only his eyes remained eternally young. Finally, an image came where the elf embraced the old man, with tears in his eyes. Behind the man was a human knight standing in full armor with a babe in his arms. The elf looked at the child and sighed. He then unwrapped his sword-belt and handed it to his lover. He planted a kiss on his cheek and stepped back into a vortex that opened right behind him. The wizard-for that's what he was now-sank to his knees, weeping and dropped the sword at his side. Then the image faded. I looked up, tears glistening in my eyes.
"That was Merlin, wasn't it?"
She nodded. "Indeed, it was."
"So that's how he became such a great wizard. He was taught by a High Elf."
"Yes. He among all humanity knew our magic, our secrets."
I looked into the pool and was startled to see it ripple. I pulled away and felt tears streaming down my cheeks. "Merlin," I groaned. Dimly, clouded by mists, I saw sea-green eyes looking at me full of love and wonder. Suddenly, I felt a wrenching pain, which I punctuated with a sob.
"He died." The words came slowly, but gradually increased in tempo. "Arthur-his protégé, his mission, his-" I gulped, "lover. He died on that day of battle. Merlin saw it happen, and despite his power, he couldn't do anything to stop it. He was still only human, and old by that time. And seeing Arthur die, it hurt him so badly."
"How do you know," she asked me gently.
"How do I know," I repeated incredulously. The fire flooding through me didn't seem mine. "How do I know? I was THERE, my Lady. I saw the last battle. I saw Merlin call Excalibur to him to prevent Mordred from taking it. I saw him prepare the blade over Arthur's fallen body. I ran towards him, crying for him to stop, but he poised himself over the blade and fell on it. I remember the armies around me being torn to shreds by my grief. I remember his eyes saw me as I cradled him in my arms. He smiled at me, and then he died. It was I who made the mound over where they fell. I who raised Stonehenge as a monument to the one I loved and his mission. Who elevated Merlin's body to the heavens as the North Star." I swallowed. "I who drove Excalibur into the stone in my rage."
"Yes," she whispered.
The tears kept flowing. "Why did he have to die? I could have shown him how to live forever!"
She shook her head. "Had you done so, Oberon would have banished you forever."
"He DID," I raged. "Because of my love for him, he drove me out!"
"Why do you suppose he did that, Matthew," she asked gently. "Because he was human?"
"NO!! Because he was male! Oberon had no like for such love, and was enraged by my feeling it! He drove me away for my ABERRATION! I left my home, my land only to return to find my lover dying on my gift to him! Don't you protect your husband, Lady Titania," I commanded. "Because of him, I have suffered a pain unknown to you."
Her eyes grew hard, and her face still. "How DARE you," she demanded in a cold voice. "Thinkest thou that I know nothing of pain? I, who am one of the eldest immortal beings on this earth? I, who have been separated from my husband, my people and my child for millennia? You foolish boy. Thinkest that Oberon's anger at thee was caused by thy love of another male, or a human? If thou but hadst eyes, thou wouldst see that many such unions exist on this isle. Long ago, we found that love is love, and remains the most powerful force of good magic in all of the planes. Doth thou think us fools? To willingly destroy or banish such power from our midst? Thy banishment, if thou choosest to name it thus was thine own choice. In thy supreme arrogance, thou couldst not face the disfavor of thy lord, and fled. Over time, thine own unwillingness to accept thy mistakes drove thee all but insane. Thou couldst not accept thine own fault in this, the great tragedy of thy life, and thou required to lay the blame on another. Naturally, the chosen target was thy Lord."
I shook my head, denying. "No, it cannot be true."
"Do not presume to doubt, Matthew. Thou knowest my words are true." Her voice softened, and she reverted to more current speech. "It hurts, I know, but you must listen. Think. Why was Oberon so upset with you?"
"Because I loved-because-Merlin-" my thoughts whirled, confused. In a flash, it came to me. "Excalibur." I looked at her.
She nodded. "It was not yours to give. The sword was on loan to you: a sign of Oberon's favor. And you gave it away, without even discussing it with him. He was right to be angered. And you feared his anger and fled."
My guilt. I caused all the suffering in my life. My stomach churned and I sank to my knees. Still, I fought on. "It matters not, my Lady. You speak of remaining separate from your husband for centuries. But I know well how you entertained many a lover, and that your separation was your choice. But you have never cradled your one love in your arms to see him die. What is time to you? Haven't you ever grown weary of life, with all your immortality? Tired of all the pain?"
She nodded. "I have, which is why, perhaps, I chose to amuse myself with others for a time." She frowned at me sternly. "And how you know of that is something I would like very much to know."
I smirked. "I knew, Lady. For decades, I told stories about the people of Avalon, and some of them remained in human memory. Eventually, a bard wrote your story into a play." I shrugged. "By then, I wasn't around to give him an account."
Her eyes were a mystery. A hint of a smile, perhaps? "Which leads me to ask you: did you grow weary of the world, young Matthew?"
I closed my eyes, trying to force the remaining pain away so I could remember, but it wouldn't leave. "Yes," I choked. My voice was thick and heavy. "I wandered for a century, trying to find something to offset the sadness. But I couldn't find anything."
"So you decided to die."
I nodded. It was coming back so clearly. "I made myself human. And an old one, at that. It only took a couple of years for me to die."
"Yes, Matthew. And that explains why I couldn't find you. As a human, your powers were diluted. Your soul remained, but it forgot everything you learned. You lived and died, only to be reborn, for you do not possess the magic to stop it. It is part of who we are."
"I wish I knew how to just end it. At least this way, I didn't have the pain of all those memories. Send them away, Lady Titania! Please!"
"I cannot. They are essential to who you are. I didn't even realize this until you came here. Do you not understand? You will go through such pain again, I think. It also is who we are." Her voice hardened slightly. "And you still must face Oberon."
"NO! I will NOT see him! Not after what he has done to me!" Once again, I was riding an emotional roller-coaster and its uncertainty drove me as much as the emotions themselves.
"You have no choice in the matter. He is lord here."
"Then I'll leave," I answered. It was a reaction more than a conscious thought. "Avalon hasn't been my home for eons." I rose. She lifted her right hand, and I couldn't move. I struggled. "Release me," I commanded. She remained unmoving.
After all she had done to me, now she wouldn't even let me leave? My rage, my fear, my hatred, my love: all the pain of loss I felt flooded through me and surged out of me in golden fire. It began at my feet and swirled upward, writhing around me like a serpent or a tornado. As is passed my waist, I felt its heat wash over me. I screamed, throwing all I had against her barrier, and the golden fire flared out, forming a glowing nimbus around me. My hair stood on end from its hot backlash blowing up from its source at my feet, which sunk into the ground slightly. The tornado whipped the wind around the cavern, shaking the rock walls and showering us with dust and rock.
Through it all, Titania stood unaffected. Even her clothes weren't affected by the wind. So, I snarled mentally, it's to be a contest of wills? I poured all I had, all I knew into the flames. My solitude, my fear, my failure of Harry and his friends. With each memory of pain, the fire grew hotter and brighter. Now, crackling bolts of blue shot through, intermingling with the white-yellow flames. William. I left William, and I didn't even have the chance to say goodbye to him or Harry. I remembered his eyes, his smile, his touch. That one, precious kiss. Everything exploded in me. The gold became solid blue, back to gold, then a red-gold and the barrier around me shattered. Titania was thrown back and the cave exploded as the fire shot out, up through the cliff and the cave entrance, dimming the very sun with its brightness.
As the fire dimmed, so did my emotions and I collapsed to my knees, exhausted. Titania slowly stood; her expression one of surprise. Her dress was now dirty, and she had a smudge on her face. She concentrated for a moment, and the dirt lifted away, leaving her as flawless as before. "You have grown much stronger in your time away," she said simply.
I didn't answer. I was having too much trouble breathing.
"You have seen enough in your life to let it go, Matthew. You have matured, have you not? Or are you still the willful child who left fearing chastisement?"
I struggled to draw breath.
She continued mercilessly. "You have come to a crossroad. Either you will face Oberon as an adult, or you will try to run again. Which is it?"
I finally pulled air into my lungs: a deep, shuddering breath that shook my entire body. "I--I will stay," I gasped.
She nodded, as though she knew what my answer would be all along. "Good." She lifted her hand again and I was lifted to my feet. Then she favored me with a smile. "I knew you would be too stubborn to admit defeat this way." I chose not to answer that. She pointed at me, and suddenly, I was blinded by a bright white light. "Now, let us make you presentable."
When the light faded, I wondered what had happened. I looked into the pool and my mouth dropped open in shock. My hair was long and the gold of my youth, and I had pointed ears! My features had become at once more fine and more rough-hewn: making my cheekbones higher and more noticeable, my face more angular. My eyebrows had been lightened to the color of molten gold and arced sharply over eyes that were as green as Avalon. My nose had slimmed and seemed to me a little on the pointed side.
The rest of the change in me was more profound. As the light suffused me, I noticed that I had no hair except for that on my head. My arms, legs, everything: completely hairless. Even my cheeks didn't have the slightest bit of fuzz or bristle. My fingers and toes had elongated slightly, making my hands seem spidery and strange. I'd even lost some weight: the miniscule baby fat around my legs and middle disappeared to reveal taught muscle under the skin.
And lastly, my clothing had changed. I now wore a soft shirt that came to my waist and a simple breechclout, both whiter than new snow. Over this, I wore an emerald green tunic which came to half-thigh and was bordered at the sleeves (short sleeves) and hem with cloth-of-gold. Running in streaks here and there were threads of silver. The neckline on the shirt and tunic was rather low, and at the lowest point of the hemisphere, an oval was cut out to reveal the center of my chest. There, an emerald hung, suspended by a silver brooch. The stone was clear as glass, so you could see through it. It was also larger than my fist. I wore a gold circlet in my hair, also with an emerald (a much smaller one) in its center. I noticed, however, that my legs remained bare, and I wore no shoes.
"This should be sufficient for an audience," she told me in answer to my questioning look. "We will arrange for other clothing for you after your meeting with Oberon." She looked at me closely, and her eyes softened. She straightened my tunic at the shoulders and drew me into a hug. "Welcome home, Tamarico," she whispered fiercely.
Tamarico. The name sounded in my head like a gong. I'd heard it before, somewhere. Oh yes. I'd used it as a nickname: a password for some of my spells. A makeup of my first and last names in an unusual combination that I didn't think anyone would realize. Tamarico. Why did she call me that? Is that really my real name??
I broke out of the hug. I looked at my long hair hanging over my shoulders. "If you don't mind, my Lady," I said, "I think I would prefer my hair shorter. I've grown tired of it being long."
"As you wish," she answered simply. With a snap of her fingers, my hair found itself much shorter-not coming below my ears-and I shook my head, trying to get used to the feeling. "Thank you."
"If you are ready?"
I nodded. She vanished and I followed after.
We both reappeared simultaneously at the crystal entrance to the great hall. Once again, the young elf with white hair and amethyst eyes approached. He looked at me, his glorious eyes glistening. "Tamarico?"
I grinned at my boyhood companion. "Hello, Puck. How are you?"
He ran at me and pulled me into a hug. We bounced a good thirty feet into the air as he lifted us, twirling around like a top and laughing so hard we were crying.
"Puck," Titania called, "you and Tamarico can reacquaint yourselves later. He has an appointment with Oberon."
Puck lowered us gently to the air and walked in only slightly before us, so to announce us. We moved through the crystalline corridor towards the grand throne room in which I'd last been interviewed. Oberon sat on his throne, garbed entirely in black, which made his skin look even more pale, though his eyes shone brightly.
"My Lord," Puck announced, "I have the honor to present the Lady Titania, your honored wife, the Queen of Light, the Lady of Mystery, and co-ruler of the Realm of Avalon, Mistress of the Seelie Court. Accompanying her is the Lord General Tamarico, First Prince of the Sword of Avalon, commander of its armies and guardian of its borders." Puck bowed and gave me a quick wink, which I subtly returned.
Titania nodded her head, and then ascended the dais to sit next to Oberon. I remained at the foot. "Tamarico," Oberon spoke slowly, his words resounding through the Chamber. "We have reviewed your case. You violated the sanctity of this realm by bringing mortals here, unbidden. You attacked members of the Royal Guard." I opened my mouth to protest, but he saw and quickly spoke, "You will not speak until you are given leave," he commanded gravely. My mouth shut. Puck tried to stifle a giggle. Oberon continued mercilessly. "You were absent from your post without permission, and moreso, you were gone for centuries. You gave Excalibur to a MORTAL, and taught him of our magic." Anger flared momentarily through his eyes. He took a deep breath.
"However, you acted with honor in these circumstances, and you have returned Excalibur to me, where it rightfully belongs. You lived as a mortal yourself for nigh a millennium, and have suffered for doing so. You have been absent from your home and family for said time, and you have used your powers, when available, for the overall good, serving our cause without being necessarily aware. This, then, is your sentence." A hush fell over the court. (Corny, I know.)
"It has been deemed that the suffering and loneliness of your self-imposed exile, as well as your acquittal at this court, was sufficient to offset any penalties of your actions. You are hereby welcomed back to this court with all your rank intact, and all of the privileges and responsibilities thereof."
Puck let out an enormous WHOOP and the rest of the court broke into applause. I bowed to both the Lord and Lady and was led off by the younger members of the court, most of whom were friends of mine before I left.
I began to resume my duties: overseeing the training of the army, and its upkeep. Chiron had done so in my absence, so I didn't have much to really do, which left me plenty of free time to live it up. My room in the palace was still as I'd left it, and my clothes all fit perfectly. Puck and I spent hours reliving our pranks, and laughing over this mishap or that. We even performed some new pranks, just for kicks.
Gradually, my lifetimes among the humans faded from my mind. I was the general of Avalon, and a High Elf in the prime of my youth. My magic had never been stronger, and I was in excellent shape from swimming and running all the time. (Often with Puck, usually in the nude.)
My duties picked up when the time came to prepare for the Summer Revel. The Summer Revel takes place at the Summer Solstice, and is usually the biggest feast of the year, full of music and dancing. It is on this night that Oberon and/or Titania often journey to the world of mortals to bask in its fullness of life, but they have not done so in centuries. Instead, the Revel takes place at Avalon, and the seas and skies are filled with song.
I helped to prepare the gardens, using my magic to set the musical wards that would sound whenever stepped upon, enchanting the gossamer walls with scents and sounds, that would make the area pleasing to all and sundry when the party began.
We had games set up so that those of us who could fly--either by wings or by magic--had three-dimensional games of tag or blind-man's bluff. On the night of the party, there were tables loaded with food--fresh vegetables, roasted meat, various wines and beers, cheeses, fresh-baked bread with fresh butter and jam: anything you could really want. The Elves are the best singers in the world, and the soft choral melodies haunted up through the air, mingled with the laughter of the revelers. Puck and I often danced together, pulling off 3-D moves with his specialization in floating. At one point, in a quieter section of the party, I was asked to play the harp, which I did amongst gales of laughter. Naturally, Puck had done something to my harp. Instead of the normal musical tones, some strange squawking noise emerged when I plucked the strings. I flipped him a rude gesture and disenchanted my harp, so that I could play it normally.
It was perhaps two or three in the morning when a young, golden-haired elf approached me. He appeared to be perhaps thirteen or so, so I knew he hadn't quite passed his first century-and-a-half.
"L-lord Tamarico," he asked me nervously.
"Yes," I inquired, sipping a crystal goblet of fine wine.
"You were here before, right, sir? I mean as a h-human." His nervousness was apparent as he spoke to me.
"Yes, I suppose I was," I answered. The thought was disturbing. I'd done so, of course, but why would I want to think about being...uhg...mortal? I mean, seriously. Those inept, hairy idiots who can't seem to think beyond the next year and who refuse to see the past further than a decade? I shuddered. What had possessed me to be one of them?
"I was wondering, sir, if you know anything about Harry."
That name jerked me out of my reverie, and I looked at the young elf. "Harry?"
"Who came with you on your last visit to Avalon? He stayed for a while...?" His tone lifted, as did an eyebrow. He looked uncertain that he was speaking to the right person, and his worry was palpable.
"What's your name," I threw out to stave off his confusion.
"Ekrasios," he answered.
With the name came the memory. Harry! Of course. He was Wills' younger brother. That thought sent a shot of pain through me. Wills. I saw his eyes, his smile. How could I have forgotten him?
"My lord," Ekrasios asked.
I blinked away sudden tears as my time with Wills came back to me fully. "He is well, Ekrasios," I answered. "He returned to school, and is with his friends and family."
The young elf nodded. "Will he be coming back?"
I sighed. "I don't think so, Ekrasios. I don't think we'll ever see them again."
My words hit home, and felt like a blow. "If you'll excuse me," I asked.
Of course, he nodded, and left me. I rose and moved into the darkest recesses of the trees, and my tears flowed. I'd left Wills. I didn't even say good-bye. What was worse, I'd forgotten him! I shook my head, trying to clear that thought away.
My travels took me through the woods and into a glen well away from the rest of the party. I didn't even realize how I'd gotten there, but the full moon shone down, illuminating the flowers and leaching the color from them. I looked up at the moon. "The same moon shines down on them. Or does it," I murmured.
I caught one of my tears in the palm of my hand and then with a whispered command, caused it to expand until it was a flat, perfect circle floating on the air above my hand. I enlarged it so it was large enough to easily see into, and then blew on it, rippling the water into stillness. "Show me," I commanded.
I needed nothing else. My mind knew what I wanted--and dreaded--to see. I saw my mother pick up the phone, then sag. Here eyes closed, and she slumped to the chair, tears streaming from her face and shoulders shaking with the force of her sobs. My father came to her, and a moment later, he was in the same state.
That hurt. I felt as though a cold hand had just plucked my heart out from my chest, and I fell to my knees, unable to take my eyes off the scene. A moment later, I saw Harry in a similar situation. He was obviously in his dormitory and was preparing for bed, when he answered the phone. He looked shaken, and I saw him speak for a moment. Then he set down the phone and began to cry.
Then the scene switched to Wills. He rushed out of the shower, a towel still wrapped around his waist, and I felt the rest of my heart lurch. He sat on the edge of his bed to answer the phone, and then he froze. I couldn't even see him breathe. Then he spoke into the phone for a short while--longer than Harry, but still not long. When he hung up, he closed his eyes and remained completely frozen. For at least a half-hour, I didn't see any movement: no rise and fall of the chest, no fluttering of the eyelids, nothing. Until a single tear glided down his cheek.
I could take no more. My breath froze in my body and my will could no longer sustain the image. It popped like a bubble and I sat there drained. What had I done? I had to fix this. Those who cared about me were all in such great pain. I had to help them. But how? They hurt so much, and just seeing their pain hurt me.
"Tamarico?" I heard Puck's voice approach me.
I wiped away my tears and sat back so that I was sitting on the ground instead of kneeling on it. I heard him approach and he laughed. "There you are. What are you doing away from the party?"
"Puck," I said with a smile, "hey."
Despite the smile, there was an obvious catch in my voice, and he frowned as he caught it. "What is it? Is something wrong? You're not hurt, are you?"
I slowly blinked my eyes. "More than you know, my friend," I answered softly.
"What are you talking about?"
"I need to go, Puck."
"What?"
"I need to go back."
"WHY?" His voice throbbed with passion. "Why would you leave? This is paradise! This is your home! You're with friends, family! You're one of the most powerful beings here, and everyone looks up to you! Why do you want to leave?"
"I have to Puck," I answered patiently. "They all think I'm dead."
"Let them," he hissed.
"No. They hurt too much. I hurt them too much."
"Then send them a message. Lady Titania can show you how to send a message through mirrors so you can show them all you're all right." He sounded desperate.
"I left him, Robin," I answered sadly.
He looked at me closely, and all of our centuries of closeness let him see everything I left unsaid. He pulled me into a hug and squeezed tightly. "I'll miss you," he whispered when we were done.
"I'll be back," I promised. I rose and headed to the Palace to make preparations for good-byes.
The next morning, I rose and asked to see Oberon and Titania. I had dressed plainly, setting aside all the silks and jewels. They granted me an audience, and both looked somber at my appearance.
I bowed to them both. "My Lord, my Lady. I have just realized that I have made a grievous error. One that I feel I must correct. So I humbly ask your permission to return to the mortal world."
"WHAT?" Oberon's shout rang through the castle. "You have just returned, and now you desire to go kiting off again?"
"I have come to make a bargain, my Lord," I answered smoothly. I'd had all night to prepare for this. "I will swear to you that I will remain in Avalon for one full century for every year I spend among the mortals. Continuous, so I cannot break it up into a century here, a century there."
"That is a lot of freedom, still, Tamarico," he reminded me. "So, tell me why I should grant this request."
"I leave now for the same reason I left before. This time, I ask your blessing."
I couldn't believe it, but his eyes actually softened--albeit momentarily. Then they hardened again. "If you go, you must become mortal again. You will have no power, and you will not communicate with us. I will change you to a human myself to insure it."
I agreed without hesitation. "So be it," he agreed. "I grant your request, and add one of my own." I waited, ready to agree to anything, if I could get back to Wills. "Return home soon, my son," he told me, a hint of pride in his voice.
I gave him my most formal bow and waited for Titania to open the gateway. I begged her to send me where I most wished to go. She did, and the shimmering vortex of white light appeared behind me. I turned and stepped through it.
Wills lay asleep in my bed, though there were dried tearstains on his face. The gateway glowed with a soft white light that bathed his face in a glistening nimbus. I reached out and touched his cheek, gently. At my touch, he twitched, and his eyes started to flutter awake. At the same time, I felt my fingers thickening, my cheekbones lowering slightly. As his eyes opened, he saw me surrounded by an aura of white light, looking down on him.
"Matt," he asked, his voice thick with wonder and sleep.
"Hi Wills," I whispered with a smile.
He sat up quickly, wiping sleep from his eyes, his face shocked. "Is it really you?"
I smiled. "Sorry to wake you like that."
"I thought you were dead," he said angrily.
"I was," I admitted. "I was in paradise, actually. Oh Wills, it was beautiful." I smiled sadly. I'd left Avalon again. I knew I'd miss it, but I also knew I'd be back one day. I looked into his blue eyes. "But it didn't have you, so I left."
He looked at me askance. "You're joking, right?"
I shook my head and pointed my thumb at the white light behind me. "Nope. I think they're keeping the way open, though. In case you don't want me to stay." I moved slightly--just getting comfortable, really, but I guess he took it as my moving to leave--and he grabbed my arm and pulled me to him.
"Huh?"
That brilliant dissertation was all I managed before he pulled me close to him and locked his lips to mine. In that moment, the light snapped off, leaving us both in near-total darkness. I felt his warmth spreading into me from his chest--his heart was beating so strongly, I felt my own being pushed to its rhythm, and his lips drew me deeper and deeper, into a light of his own.
As I felt his tongue ask for admittance, I felt all his worry, all his fear and all his uncertainty vanish in this one, perfect moment. We both groaned--his a measure of his relief, mine of release. I could finally let go of a millennia of pain and loneliness. I could finally remember what it is to love and be loved.
Our hearts beat as one, and our souls merged. Though the kiss lasted for perhaps a moment, we floated there in an eternity of bliss, feeling life through each other's senses, seeing ourselves through each other's eyes.
The light of dawn peaked through the window, bringing us both back to startled wakefulness. We lay arm in arm, draped across each other. My head was on his chest, and I felt completely at peace listening to his heartbeat.
He looked at me and smiled. "You're really here."
"I'll never leave again," I promised. He leaned down and kissed me again. (Note to readers: you KNOW you're in love when you don't care about morning breath.) We lay there for a good while, just savoring the feel of skin against skin--his is SO soft!
Eventually, I rose, reluctantly, and thought a hot shower would be appropriate--one thing I didn't have in Avalon. As I was washing my face, I heard the shower door open behind me and Wills stepped in. "Mind if I join you," he asked. I could HEAR the grin.
"Not at all," I answered happily. I felt a slight poke in my lower back. "Was that your finger," I asked with a chuckle.
"Would you rather it be," he replied.
"Doesn't matter to me in the slightest," I demurred, completely truthful. I finished washing my face and turned to see my beautiful prince. It turned out that it WAS his finger that had poked me, but I didn't mind. Playfully, I gave him a peck on the cheek, then ignored him as I continued to wash and wake up.
"Would you like me to wash your back," came the artfully innocent question.
"Sure," I answered, "if I get yours."
With his hands running over my back and shoulders, I leaned forward, giving the pleasurable massage more access. His hands ran down my back to my butt, squeezing a little, then down to my legs. As he came back up, he spread apart my cheeks and gave me a light, gentle wash. I shuddered as I felt his finger brush across my rosebud, but he didn't press. Perhaps he didn't know to, or just didn't want to. Either way, it was still great, and making it even better was the knowledge that I'd get to do so to him.
Momentarily, my time came. He turned around, giving me access to his beautiful backside, and I repeated the washing process. Both of us were hanging heavy afterward, but rather than pursue that, I gave him a gentle tug and turned off the water.
"Aaw," he protested with a groan.
"Later," I promised.
We returned to the bedroom and dressed. "I'm going to have to go back to school in another day or so," Wills said. I nodded. "Come with me?"
"I have to make some phone calls, and we can see what I can arrange."
We gave each other a quick kiss, went downstairs, and Wills began making breakfast. I asked him Harry's number, and then rang him.
"H-hullo," his groggy voice answered.
"Harry," I put a little snap in my voice, "you're late for class. Get up!"
"What?! I can't be! I set my alarm!" He retorted fuzzily, whilst his brain struggled to realize that it was the weekend.
Finally, he seemed awake enough--or perhaps he checked his alarm clock to reply with a bit of acid. "Oh, ha, ha. Who is this? Is that you, Jeremy?"
"Nope," I answered with a grin. "Guess again." OK, so it was Juvenile. I'd only been a mortal for a day again.
"Erm," he thought for a moment.
I decided to help him.
"Ekrasios asked about you."
"MATT" he screamed. I'm sure he woke up his whole dorm. Wills laughed from the kitchen. It was loud enough, anyway. "Holy shit," he exclaimed. "I thought you were dead!"
"I'm not," I said, knowing it would drive him nuts.
"You bastard, don't toy with me! We got a call from our father, saying he'd received word from the Minister of Magic that you were dead."
I sighed. "Well, to that world, I am. I don't have any magic any more."
"What?"
"Price of life, my friend. Besides," I looked at William--so cute in the apron he was wearing, "it was worth it."
"Where are you?"
"At my house."
"I'm coming over," he decided.
"When will you be here," I asked with a fake groan.
"Just in time for lunch," he told me impishly. With a click, he hung up.
I laughed. "We're gonna have company."
Wills came out with some food. "Why am I not surprised."
He sat on the couch next to me, handed me a plate, and we both dug in. I was surprised. He's a decent chef, actually. Huh. The things you can learn about a person. After we ate, we washed dishes and decided to just watch the television until Harry made it over.
"Did you really give up your magic, just for me?"
"Oh, you heard that part, I take it."
"'Fraid so."
"'Fraid so," I mimicked.
"Matt, this isn't a time for jokes," he reprimanded me. Then he smiled to take the sting out of it.
"Sorry. Actually, yes, I did. But I think you're worth it."
We kissed and cuddled on the couch, waiting for our guest. Sure enough, around noon, Harry dropped in. "Matt," he exclaimed, giving me a hug. "I've missed you!"
I laughed. "I've only been gone for...how long was it, anyway?"
"Three days," Harry answered me.
"Is that all," I was shocked. That damn time difference again.
"It was enough," Wills told me.
"That was sweet," I told him, drawing him into a kiss.
Harry stared.
"Oh, get over it, Harry," I laughed. "You've known about me since I met you."
"Yes, I'm just not sure whether to be happy for you both, or jealous."
"Of me," I asked with feigned shock.
He sighed as wills nudged me in the shoulder. "Sorry," I laughed. "But I appreciate the compliment."
"Back off, Harry," Wills said with mock-ferocity. "He's mine."
We all laughed for a moment. "Do Father and Grandmother know," Harry wondered.
The laughter froze. "Know what," I ventured hesitantly.
"That you're alive," he supplied.
"Oh, that," I heaved a sigh of relief.
"And that you're together," he added.
"No to both counts," I said. "But that will have to be fixed eventually."
"Matt," Wills turned to me.
I shook my head. "It can wait. This isn't the best time. Let's just tell them I'm alive and well. That should be more than enough for now."
It was. It was also more than enough for my parents back in America. They were ecstatic to hear from me, though I warned them that calls would have to be limited. "I'm out of work," I told my worrying mother. "Since I don't have any more magic."
"Are you coming home, then," she asked.
"I'm not sure," I answered. "I bought this house, so I may stay here. Besides, maybe I'll go to school here," I added with a wink to Wills.
Later that afternoon, we went to the Leaky Cauldron where, with a little help from the bartender, the doorway was opened to Diagon Alley. I sighed. Without any magic, I'd never be able to come back again. Wills noticed my distress and subtly grasped my hand and gave it a squeeze as we walked. My purpose was to empty my account at Gringott's before the agency took it away. It'd be useful.
The Gringott's goblin looked at me with actual horror when I told him my plan. Wills and Harry joined me on the lift/minecar down to my vault, which was (luckily) still piled high with gold, silver and bronze. They gaped. "This is all yours," Wills managed to ask.
"I have a second vault, much smaller, where my valuables are kept. I'll need to clear that one out," I answered, "but yeah, this is my money."
"It's huge," Harry muttered.
I snorted. "If your money were in gold and silver and you piled it up, it'd be much larger than my pile."
"Still..." he trailed off, looking.
I looked to the goblin. "What's the conversion rate to pounds sterling?"
When he answered, I nodded. "Good. I'll take my money in that. Bills are much easier to carry, you understand." He protested that they didn't have enough bills.
I thought about it for a moment. "Easy enough to fix," I told him. "This is gold, and its sheer value as gold is probably worth more than a single pound. I could probably get three or four pounds per Galleon. So, let's just convert as many of my Sickles and Knuts into Galleons, and I'll take them all with me."
He tried to get me to change my mind, but I don't deal with finicky Goblins. With a whimper, he went off to do the conversions.
Wills and Harry laughed. "That was cruel," Harry said.
"Where are you going to take all that gold," Wills asked. "Too much of it could upset the market."
"I know," I admitted. "But I'd planned on taking it all to Zurich. They could convert it to ANY form of money I desire, and the accounts couldn't be taxed."
We made arrangements for the gold to be sent to Zurich as a bank-to-bank transfer. The few Knuts and Sickles that couldn't be converted into gold I took with me--for future use if necessary, but primarily as mementos.
Harry stayed the night, but had to be back for a study group the next day. We bid him adieu and Wills and I spent the rest of the day talking. I told him about my history, and my life: my schooling until I'd left to join the DADL, my home life, etc. and he filled me in on the same.
We discussed what we wanted to do from that point, and finally reached an agreement. We both made a few telephone calls, and when it was done, I had a new name-sanctioned by the Prime Minister, it wasn't hard-and would be applying for my senior year at Eton, whence I could Join Wills at the university.
When the errands were done, we sipped some tea and snuggled, watching the tele. Finally, that night, we decided that as it was to be our first time-not only with each other, but in general-we wanted it to be special.
It was.
And it was special every time afterwards.
I scored well at Eton, in the top ten of my class actually, then followed Wills to St. Andrews. It was a beautiful campus, and it wasn't difficult to arrange our being suite-mates. I studied political science and history, though I continued my training in martial arts and weaponry--getting all the required documentation to be a professional bodyguard. More importantly, though, is that Wills and I were together.
Around Wills' twenty-fifth birthday, his father made an enormous decision and married Camilla Parker Bowles. I was happy for Prince Charles, but when we heard the news, Wills and I just looked at each other. At that point, we began making preparations.
Wisely so, it seems, because it was only a year later that his grandmother, the Queen, died. The funeral was stupendous--the pomp and circumstance was incredible, and some of the medievalism made me feel at home. The populace showed up and grieved for their Queen, and all-in-all, it was heartwarming to see the usually-stuffy Brits show some emotion. At the funeral, Harry's newest girlfriend, Jessica, gave him some support. However, for some strange reason, the cameras just wouldn't take any pictures of the grieving family.
Wills' coronation took place one week later.
We knew it was going to happen. Because of his marriage, Charles had pulled himself out of the running for the throne. Some obscure law about divorce and the royal family. Be that as it may, at the ripe old age of twenty-six, His Royal Highness Prince William Arthur Phillip Louis Windsor of Wales became His Royal Majesty King William V.
The outpouring of popular support for William gave me some ideas. Slowly, we began to implement changes. I was the head of his security, and his bodyguard. At the onset of his reign, Wills was a figurehead in the government, as his grandmother had been, and perhaps even before her. Let me say now that I LOVED this boy! In all formal occasions, he was the King, and a proper deference was his due, but for Harry, and for me, once we were in private--with Harry, in public as well--deference could go to hell. Wills had already begun erasing the image of the cold, emotionless royalty--and better, he managed to do so without minimizing the respect the title was due.
He and I worked closely together, relying on his father's advice and the current world situation so that at his first official opening of Parliament, he had a speech prepared that the Prime Minister did NOT write.
As I stood behind Wills' throne off his right shoulder, the livid man couldn't approach. He knew I was armed to the teeth for this one, and my smirk said it all.
Now, to be fair, Wills' speech didn't differ all that much from the Prime Minister's, but it did vary on a few minor points. Its primary purpose was to show the government that Wills was not going to be merely a figurehead, and that even though he didn't have the supreme authority of monarchs in the past, he refused to let one of the oldest surviving forms of government lose its validity.
To be honest, I'm not sure the Prime Minister understood how serious we were until perhaps four months later when Wills made a surprise visit to Parliament. If any of you have ever seen a live session of Parliament, it resembles a riot trapped inside a single building. Or perhaps Wall Street. Either way, you have dozens, if not hundreds of people who my all end up shouting at the same time. It is absolute pandemonium.
Wills walked into the door, and there was an almost immediate silence. It was actually deafening. He asked permission to speak to Parliament, and it was immediately given. This time, he wore no state robes, no crown jewels. Only a rather simple (and elegant) suit. As usual, I stood behind him, dressed in the bright crimson of the Royal Guard. He made a proposal, one involving funding of small businesses, especially in London, but to encourage the growth of such throughout all of Britain.
He was asked if he had an accounting to back his proposal. With that heart-wrenching smile, he answered he wouldn't waste everyone's time if he didn't. At his nod, a copy of the accounting (that we'd worked the past four months on) was passed to all the members. He asked them to peruse it and hoped they'd support it.
The motion was passed two days later.
Everything really seemed to run smoothly. I think my history being completely and utterly hidden upset some of the tabloids, since they couldn't find anything about Wills' new security chief who seemed to be spending so much time with him except that we were in school together.
One of them, which shall remain nameless, tried to make some things up, but I nailed them for slander and rather easily completely shut it down. The rest took the message.
Not long after that, Wills took something else away from the Prime Minister. Usually, the post of the Minister of Magic was known only to the PM, and was under his authority. Wills and I, due to our extensive knowledge of that aspect of society took it upon ourselves to inform the Minister that the post of Minister of Magic would be directly under the THRONE from now on, and that a new Minister of Magic was already approved by us.
So it was that Harry Potter, who was famous among the magical society for his defeat of the Dark Lord Voldemort (after many trials and hardships, but that's not my story to tell), became the new Minister of Magic under King William V. His shock at the position was nothing compared to his shock at seeing me alive, and it was a good reunion all-round.
Another year and a half later, Harry (Wills' brother, don't forget) married Jessica. Wills was, of course, his best man, and the wedding was spectacular. Jess had the same flair for life and sense of adventure that Harry had. They really seemed to compliment each other. And they'd waited so long to get married so that the disasters of Harry's uncles' marriages wouldn't be repeated. These two KNEW they were in love, and had spent enough time around each other to stay that way.
At this time, there were a few mutterings about why William hadn't gotten married and continued the Royal Line. Lots of rumors spread, and some of them were even close. Wisely, His Majesty chose to refrain from any comments.
Eleven months later, Harry and Jessica had their first child, a son named James. Wills, even more than the rest of us, was ecstatic. I looked at him intently. I hadn't been able to read minds in years, but normally he and I were connected on such a level we often knew what the other was thinking, but I was at a complete blank.
The new addition to the Royal Family brought loads of press, and Wills withstood its constant assault and pressure.
That is, he did until his thirtieth birthday.
On June 21, 2012, Wills called a press conference. Many were the dignitaries around to celebrate his birthday, and my handsome Wills (still looking in his early twenties, I might add) stood on the balcony of Buckingham Palace surrounded by microphones and cameras.
"A great deal of inquiry has been directed at me," he said, "regarding my private life and the continuation of the royal line. So I have called you all together to make an announcement. As a matter of fact, I have been in a long-term relationship that I am most pleased with." There was a titter in the crowd. "This relationship has lasted through pain and grief and joy. It has been a crutch to help me through my responsibilities, and on which to test new ideas. It has been my support, and has made me one of the happiest men in the world."
"How long has it been going on," one of the reporters asked.
"A little over ten years," he answered. They were shocked and he laughed. "Keeping it from all of you wasn't too difficult," he told them. "I just made sure to keep your eyes elsewhere."
"Have any secret children," another reporter asked sarcastically.
"No," he replied amiably. "In fact, today I name my nephew James as my successor to the throne." Thousands of flashbulbs went off as the reporters hurriedly took notes or checked their recording equipment to make sure they'd gotten his statement.
"Your Majesty," ventured one reporter hesitantly. "You've kept this relationship a secret for a long time. Now that you've mentioned it, I trust you don't plan to keep it a secret."
I paled with horror. He wouldn't.
"Not at all," Wills agreed with a smile.
"Who is it," someone called loudly from the back.
"Would you like to meet him," my beautiful, bastard of a lover asked disarmingly. Then he laughed at the sight of forty-some-odd jaws dropping. I had closed my eyes and was shaking my head. He did. I couldn't believe it.
So I was startled when he grasped my hand and pulled me to the forefront of the balcony. He rested our clasped hands on the edge of the balcony and whispered, "I hope you're not angry."
"With you," I snorted, "hardly. But I think you just scared ten or fifteen years off my life," I complained.
"You're not going without me," he said gently.
"Nowhere without you," I promised. "Ever."
It took less than three hours for the denunciations to begin.
Primarily, the people doing so were the hard-core religious fundamentalists in the UK, US and Middle-East. I suppose we were prepared for this, but aside from blistering epithets from pulpits around the world, no political action was taken. Just in case, however, I wore a pair of throwing knives up my sleeves whenever out in public.
Yet, we are the MTV generation. Before too long, enormous support came through, and Wills' human nature and courage astounded most people-even many of his detractors. It became argued that the royal line was secure, and he was still the most efficient and popular monarch in memory, so what was the big deal.
The one and only assassination attempt on his life came perhaps eight months later. The man was blonde-haired, and had bright blue eyes, like the summer sky. He was perhaps in his mid to late twenties. It was his intention to show the world the wrongness of our lifestyle by killing Wills-and me, if possible-during one of his heavily-televised humanitarian visits. I was walking next to Will when I saw the glint of light on the barrel of his pistol. We were simply walking down a street in a small village in Africa. The press saw me push down the King, knocking him to the dirt as I turned to face the would-be assassin.
He glared at me and pulled the trigger.
Before the hammer could depress completely, I had flicked my knives into my hands. The guy was a good shot, I'll give him that. The bullet raced straight towards my chest.
With a ringing sound heard throughout the street, I brushed the bullet aside with my knife. He gaped and fired again and again. Each time, I knocked the bullet away. I began stepping closer to him, my face full of rage, and my eyes burning with anger. I almost sensed Will trying to get up and yelled at him to stay down. At fifteen feet, the assassin had run out of ammunition. That's when I threw my first knife.
The blade went right through his foot, pinning him to where he stood. He screamed in pain. I stepped up and he threw a desperate punch at me. I stepped to the side, grabbed his wrist with one hand, and with the other snapped his arm almost in two at the elbow. He screamed again, and for good measure, I snapped a kick into the side of his knee, shattering that. Using the momentum from the kick, I spun into a second kick that shattered his jaw.
With my right hand, I hauled him off the knife, causing more damage in the process, but he couldn't do anything through his broken jaw except groan. With my left hand, still holding the knife, I made a fast, deep slice across his belly, just below his navel. As blood spurted, the process known as disemboweling began, with his intestines sliding their way through into the outside world. Painful, but not fatal, though he could die from the blood loss eventually.
Finally, I looked up into his terror-filled eyes. "Good try," I told him, almost casually before I punched up, shattering his windpipe. He tried to draw air through the ruined passage, but just couldn't do so, and his eyes told him that he knew it. Then, for good measure, I sent him a mental image fueled by my anger: the torment he would know in Hell for all of eternity.
He took a long time to die. And it was all caught on tape.
Then I contemptuously flung him to the ground and went to get Will. "How did you do that," he asked.
I would have smiled, but the circumstances didn't call for it. "I didn't lose all of my power, just most of it," I answered. "Using it is very hard, unless I'm royally pissed off."
He gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you. You know, for saving my life."
"Hey," I said with a smirk, "I'm your bodyguard."
It was probably my knocking bullets aside like flies that prevented any further attacks. Or perhaps it was the ruthlessness of my counterattack. Either way, no one ever made the mistake of trying to hurt the King of England again.
As I'd told Wills, I did have SOME of my magic. I'd discovered it years ago, when still staying at my house. I realized that Oberon had been the one to change me into a human, not Titania, and when I'd left Avalon, my magic was greater than his. So there was no way he could deny me all of my power. Most of it was indeed gone, yet some remained, and I learned to develop it with time. None of my matter-affecting spells remained: I couldn't control elements, and I couldn't move things or travel anyplace, but when I needed to, I could increase my speed and strength to inhuman proportions. I could also, at great effort, communicate mentally or read a person's mind. But prolonged or exceptional use drained me, wearying me for days.
What Wills didn't know is that quite possibly, I could have hurled some sort of lightning at his attacker, but I'd done something else that remained a constant sap of my strength. I'd affected time. Wills was thirty, and looked to be just at twenty or so. That grace would remain-and did. At forty, he looked in his late twenties, at fifty, not much older. His body remained firm and toned and smooth. He retained some of the other...benefits of youth-at least as I saw them. (Need I extemporize?)
At sixty, he got his first major wrinkles, and his hair began to slightly gray at the temples. I think it make him look very distinguished.
Time was having similar affects on me, since I'd arranged it so, and the press began to notice. Our health was easily that of men twenty years our junior, and we were expected to live well into our hundreds.
Meanwhile, Harry had had other children: Matthew, his second, Elizabeth, his third, and Andrew his fourth. They, in turn, had children. Wills and I were happy grandparents and we spoiled the children outrageously.
Harry, on the other hand, didn't fare as well, and though he was still in good health, time wore him down much more severely than us. Sometimes, I caught Wills looking at me, concerned about his brother, and we discussed it from time to time.
And then Jessica died. She was sixty-four, so she'd lived well, but she had a congenital heart failure, and nothing could be done to save her. We all went into mourning. She had been part of the family for over forty years, and we all missed her ready smile and active sense of humor.
Something in Harry seemed to die when she did. For five years, he moped around, unable to completely deal with her passing.
Finally, I managed to get Harry into a drawing room of the palace with only Wills and myself in attendance. No servants, no aides, no one. "Harry, why are you acting like this," I asked. "You should be stronger than this. I know it hurts, believe me, but you have the rest of us, too, you know."
"I suppose I just have regrets," he said sadly.
"Regrets?" I hadn't expected THAT answer.
"I see you and Wills together and I sort of with I'd had that."
"But you did," he pointed out. "You and Jess were together for forty years, Harry! That's amazing nowadays."
He sighed. "I know, but I always wondered what it would be like, if I'd been like you two. I could have been."
I nodded. "Yes, you could have. As it so happened, the person who you fell in love with was a woman. Why the regret?"
"Because she wasn't the one I truly, deep down wanted to be with."
WHAT?? What did Harry just say? He lived for forty years to a woman he didn't want to be with????
"Uh, could you explain that a little, Harry," I asked, confused.
"Oh, I loved Jess," he assured us. "But did you ever notice that she resembled Ekrasios? Her face and her eyes." He laughed a little. "Her sense of humor. Being with her, I was with him at the same time." He noticed our glances. "It's rather fucked up, isn't it?"
I raised an eyebrow, looking at Wills. "It's not fucked up, Harry," he assured his brother. "Strange, yes, but I remember how much fun you had with Ekrasios." That got me thinking. I'd need more time, but...perhaps...
Three years later, I looked at Wills as we lay in bed together. "You look tired," I commented.
"I am," he answered. "Very tired. I'm rather ready to go, Matt."
"Go?"
"Go. If I didn't know I'd be leaving you behind, I would have gone on long ago. James is more than ready to be king."
"You've taught him well," I agreed, "but no one has your charisma or popularity. Wills, you've almost been an autocratic ruler based entirely on your charisma and attitude. Not that you've been a bad ruler," I hastened to assure him, "but I doubt even James would be able to do much with like you did."
"I suppose," he answered wearily, closing his eyes.
I looked at him closely. He really was tired. I could see it. Though his body was much younger, his soul just seemed tired. He'd lived a long time and done a lot. We were nearly eighty, and that many years of responsibility--REAL responsibility--is tiring.
"Wills," I asked with all seriousness, "would you like to go? If you didn't have to worry about leaving me behind, would you?"
"Yes," he answered after a minute. "I think I would."
I nodded. "Then let's go." He looked at me confused. I bade him to wait, then gave him a kiss and summoned an aide. "Will you please find Prince Harry and Prince James, please," I asked.
They were ushered into the bedroom, Harry looking absolutely terrible. I whispered to Wills, "Tell him what you want him to hear. He's going to be King after today."
He looked at me with complete trust in his eyes, then told James what to expect. James looked shaken. "What are you saying, Uncle Will?"
He looked at me. "Your uncle and your father and I are going away, James. I hesitate to say die, but it amounts to the same thing. We will retire and you won't hear from us again." Wills nodded and Harry looked at me in confusion.
James thought a while. "Let me bring the children to all say good-bye?"
"Sure."
We spent the day with family. All of the children got a lot of attention, and Harry looked happier than I'd seen him in years. When the youngest had been sent to bed, I excused myself so Harry and Will could talk to James.
Upstairs, I found what I'd been looking for: one of the items I'd taken out of my vault at Gringott's decades ago. It was a talisman, meant to temporarily increase the power of its user, but it could only be used once by any given person. Thus far, I had never used it.
Around midnight (a late night for us old people), Harry and Will joined me in the bedroom. I asked them each to hold my hand as I stood us in front of a full-length mirror.
"Armar corathath dei. Ich man alashte mor. Ime navaliea, edro Avolone," I intoned.
The amulet glowed brightly, as did the mirror. I felt drained, weak, but slowly, inexorably, I stepped through the mirror, dragging Will and Harry with me.
Once back in Avalon, Oberon's spell faded. I was returned to the preternaturally youthful Elf I'd been and I could feel my power flooding through me. Wills and Harry looked around with wonder. Harry turned to ask if we were where he thought we were when he caught sight of me. He yelped, surprised, and Wills turned to see.
"This is the real me, Will," I told him, rather sadly.
He smiled. "As long as it's you," he told me softly. I drew him into a deep, loving kiss, and felt my power flood out of me and into him. Against my lips, I felt his thicken slightly, and heard the gasp of surprise from him. When we broke the kiss a moment later, he was seventeen again, his body well and truly young, rather than its semblance.
Harry gaped and I looked at Will. "Forgive me for a moment of indiscretion," I told him as I pulled Harry into a similar kiss. Something that I think he'd wanted for a long time--unless I was flattering myself, of course. My power flowed up once again, and Harry was also returned to youth--also seventeen years of age.
Now I was the young one--I only seemed about sixteen, but I didn't mind.
"Welcome to Avalon," I told them. "Welcome to my home. I'm rather afraid you're here to stay," I added regretfully. "As am I."
They whooped and hollered and laughed. We ran with renewed vigor through the grasslands and the woods. We had our youth again, and we had it forever. We knew what it was to grow old, and we had moved beyond time. With a single thought, I lifted the three of us into the air and we zoomed towards the Palace of Light.
On the steps of the palace, Puck sat teaching Ekrasios how to play the harp. For once, he didn't seem mocking, didn't seem sarcastic. I lowered us to the ground in front of them, and he jumped to his feet. "Tamarico," he whispered.
"Hello, coz," I grinned. "I'm back."
He flew at me and again pulled me into a hug. "Puck, I'm sure you remember William," I introduced him, formally. "Wills here is my soul-mate. My husband."
Puck looked at William with the impression he could see right through his clothes. Come to think of it, he probably could. Wills blushed and Puck grinned. "You've chosen a looker, coz," he replied.
I wrapped my arm around Wills' shoulders. "Don't I know it?"
"So I suppose this is-" he broke off as he turned to address Harry, since Harry and Ekrasios were having a rather spirited reunion of their own. I laughed and nudged Wills. "Your little brother is besting us, Will. He's had the best of both worlds."
Wills shook his head. "I've got the best of both worlds," he said.
It was so sweet, I hugged him close and coughed until Harry and Ekrasios broke off. "Well," I said with a smile, "let's introduce you to the rest of the family. I think you'll see a few faces you recognize." And arm in arm, Wills and I walked through the opening gateway followed by Harry and Ekrasios, with an ecstatic Puck rushing through to announce us.
Oberon and Titania may not be thrilled with what I'd done, but it was done, and no power on earth would separate us. We were home. For all of the rest of time.
Author's Note: This is the final chapter to My Life at Hogwarts. I would like to thank everyone who has written me expressing interest or enjoyment of this story. Once again, the song at the beginning is from Libera's self-titled CD "Libera." If you're interested at all in hearing them, try their website at www.libera.org.uk. Thank you all for your support, and keep reading. There are dozens of stories out there that far surpass mine. Thanks to JK Rowling for creating a world that let me play out a fantasy or two, and thanks to my penis, for giving me the inspiration to have these fantasies.