My Name Is Connor

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I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. I haven't had time to write something like this in forever so it was pretty fun. Other stories by me include One or the Other, Gavin's Got Game, Hayden's Story, Shawn's Turn, Teddy Bear, and the After Party. The first five are found here in the gay highschool section and the latter two are in the gay college section. If you do enjoy reading this, you can contact me at wah.stories@yahoo.com.

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Spencer and I were at our favorite coffee shop, Solidarity, the Friday before the show; it had become a tradition of ours. Most of the others would be home going over their lines but Spencer and I wanted to soothe our souls and collect ourselves the day before, we wouldn't be able to do anything if we were stressed.

Spencer took a sip of her French vanilla iced coffee. "So, how are you and Micah?" Shortly after Troye dropped me off on Monday, I called Spencer and brought her up to speed with everything that's happened so far, even the whole boxer thing.

"We're good. I saw him on Wednesday. We just hung out, nothing special." I went over to Micah's and met his family. He had already come out to them and they all automatically assumed I was his boyfriend. It was kinda embarrassing but it was nice to know that if it does happen, his parents will treat me like a son.

"Are you all dating yet?"

"Nope. We're taking it slow. I didn't want to jump into a relationship going into the musical. I didn't think it would be a smart idea."

"Well that's cute. I'm glad you finally have a cutie like him in your life."

"I've always had a cutie in my life. You and I met when we were little."

Spencer just rolled her eyes. "You are the best fake boyfriend a girl could ever ask for."

"I know I am. Hopefully I'll be the best real boyfriend soon."

"You really like Micah, don't you? Not only do you smile every time I say his name, but you've been swirling your mocha and caramel swirl so much it's no longer a swirl."

I looked down sure enough and I was still stirring my drink with my straw, I hadn't taken a sip of it yet. "He's sweet. I don't know if it's going to work out but I want to see what happens. I remember when you started talking to Lauren. You bought a lot of bras `for yourself' and your boobs were basically out of all of your shirts and dresses."

Spencer let out a small laugh; I could tell that she was reflecting on that time. "Yeah. I definitely went the extra mile to impress her. Just promise me you'll be careful, Con. I've talked to him a couple times and I think he's sweet too. It's just...you know me? I like to be in control of everything and I can't control the way he treats you."

"But you don't care about mine and," I realized what I was about to say would definitely be something I would regret saying tomorrow morning so I had to think on the spot, "mine and Patrick's friendship?"

She smirked. "Oh sweetie, I own his ass. He knows better than to fuck with you. And just so you know, I did have the talk with Micah already and I may have scarred him."

"Spencer!"

"What?" Spencer smiled. "I do these things out of love."

I couldn't help but smile along with her. Last year I would have been so upset with her but at this point, I was so used to Spencer and her desire to be in control. That quality about her is what made me fake fall in love with her.

"Are you still going to Troye's game tomorrow?" This was the topic that we always avoided. Spencer definitely disagreed with all of this but after hours of arguing with her, she decided to leave it alone.

"Yeah. I'm not really sure what people wear to basketball games. Do you?"

"Just wear regular clothes, Con. Nothing special is needed for sporting attire. Bring something for the after party because we are rehearsing as soon as the game ends. You are not going to have any time to head home."

I had never attended one of the theater after parties up to this point. They never sounded appealing to me but this year Patrick and Spencer told me I have to go to this once since I have a lead role.

"I promise I will be there. We will be the couple of the year." I put my hands out and held hers. "You may be the head turner but I'm going to be the one that keeps their attention."

She took her hands out from under mine. "We will see about that. I am going to be both of those. You are just going to be my cute arm candy to keep the guys away."

"You know, most divas would love the attention of guys. You're just special, I guess."

"Sweetie, we're both special." Spencer then stood up and grabbed her bag. "I need to get going. I need to go shopping. Wanna come?"

I stood up to head out with her and grabbed my bag. "No. Why do you need to go shopping? You went to the mall last week."

"I need a dress for tomorrow night. What else would I wear to the party?"

"You have at least thirty dresses in your closet that would work."

"Connor. I've already worn all of them. I'm not going to let people see me in one of them a second time. Are you insane?"

Sadly, she was serious. "I think you're the one that needs to see a doctor. You are addicted to shopping."

"There is no such thing as a shopping addiction, Connor. That's just a way for psychologists made up to make more money."

"Whatever." The two of us paid for refills and left the coffee shop. I was just about to make up an excuse for why my mom wasn't out there when both Spencer and I saw a familiar car with a familiar face approaching.

Spencer just rolled her eyes. "Looks like your chauffer is here."

"Hey Connor." Troye said. "I was waiting for you at the school and you never came out so I decided to drown my sorrows in coffee."

"I'm so sorry! I forgot to tell you I'd be going here with Spencer today." I really did feel bad. We hadn't even been friends a week and I had already ditched him by accident.

Troye seemed to just notice her when I said her name, I'm guessing he was also trying to play the game where they don't acknowledge each other. "Hi, Spencer. It's been a long time, hasn't it?"

Spencer smiled, I was so happy she didn't give him the death glare. Then the Spencer I knew showed herself. "It could have been longer."

I just stared at her in disbelief. Troye was obviously thrown back but he seemed less shocked. Spencer then turned to address me. "I'll see you tomorrow after the game. Don't stay too long."

Once she was gone, I turned back to Troye. "I'm so sorry for that. She was totally out of line with that comment."

"It's cool. That's how I thought you would react to me trying to be your friend again. At least she isn't hiding her real feelings about me."

"Were you really waiting outside the school for me?" I wanted to change the subject. Spencer and Troye were definitely two people who needed to remain on two completely different planets.

"Yes. And just so you know, I wasn't stalking you. I really was going to go get some coffee. I can get it to go if you still want a ride..."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course! I'd do anything for your trust, remember?" I followed Troye back into Solidarity so he could get something for himself.

"Since you brought that up, you're coming to the musical tomorrow, right?"

"I wouldn't miss it for anything." He winked when he said this and I could feel a part of myself melt. I knew feeling that way wasn't right. Micah and I are just now starting whatever we have and I should focus all my attention on him. But I just can't shake this crush yet, even though it's hopeless.

"Well good. I really did save you a seat in the front row so I will know if you're there or not."

"Oh really? I honestly didn't think you would do that. Now I do have to come up with a better excuse than you just couldn't see me in the middle rows."

"I planned on asking you questions about the musical so you couldn't do that anyways."

"I'm not as dumb as you think I am, Con." He was definitely imitating Spencer when he called me Con, she's the only person who says it. "I would have rented the movie somewhere and watched it."

"And you think I'm stupid? I would ask you questions about the things we changed from the movie."

Troye then ordered his basic white boy drink and we were on our way. At every stop sign and stop light on the way to my house, Troye would take a slow sip of his drink, turn to face me, and say some of the corniest things I've heard in a long time. I couldn't help but laugh at some of the things but for the most part I just rolled my eyes and he laughed. It was nice having him around again. I know being friends in high school is different than being friends in elementary school, such as the things you do and the things you talk about, but that first week of us hanging out again was nothing less that amazing.

After he dropped me off, nothing special really happened. I did get to spend some quality time with my sister, Sophie, but other than that it was a dull afternoon. It didn't take me long to fall asleep that night, I was more than ready for Saturday to happen; my first basketball game and my first lead role. How else could the day get any better?

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"Let's go, badgers!" A random woman shouted from the bleachers.

I had just gotten into the gym and there were people everyone, people I didn't even know existed. They were all talking amongst each other, jumping in and out of conversations around them. It was so weird to me. I was used to obvious divisions between who talked to who. Sometime there was a little blur in the cases of me and Micah and Spencer and Lauren, but those were special cases. Here it seemed like there was no pecking order and you could talk to whoever you wanted to.

I got something to eat from the concession stand, a bag of chips and a drink, and went to find a place to sit. Troye said that if I wanted to see the game the best, I should sit close to the half court line. Going into this I knew very little about basketball but I at least understood that half court was the middle of the gymnasium.

I sat closer to the top of the bleachers in a spot that was distant from other people. Since Troye is the only one I know in this entire place, I decided not to awkwardly sit next to anyone and allow people to awkwardly sit next to me.

Thankfully the people who ended up sitting around me weren't really jocks but they weren't drama geeks either. I tried not to listen in on their conversations too much but when you have no one to talk to there's nothing left to do. They obviously went to Clay Central and this made me happy because I then had a way to figure out when I needed to cheer.

Eventually the basketball team came out and the bleachers erupted. People were screaming. People were clapping. People were stomping. People were doing a combination of the three. I was so thrown off that I awkwardly sat there and took everything I; I knew from the get go that I would be very awkward in this setting so it didn't bother me.

When the game started, I noticed that Troye was going to be starting the game, I then realized what he meant by the starting line. The game commenced and the cheering ensued. The student section was going crazy, making sure that everyone was hyped up. The cheerleaders were doing their thing and I thought it was kind of interesting. I knew it was my gay side coming out but if I were to join the jock world it would probably be through cheerleading.

Once the buzzer for halftime buzzed, we were up by ten points. Everyone on Clay Central's side of the gym was ecstatic. The cheerleaders ran out onto the court but before they started anything I decided it was time for me to empty my bladder and refill my drink.

As I was nearing the concession stand, a pair of arms wrapped around me and I was immediately drenched in the person's sweat. I was about to shout but I realized that the only person who would acknowledge my existence at this game would be Troye.

"I'm so glad you made it. How'd I do?" He asked as he let me go.

I turned to face him and he was still panting and red-faced. "To be honest, I'm not really sure. I think you were doing great out there though, you had the ball a lot."

He just laughed. "Yeah, that's a good thing. Are you enjoying yourself?"

"Don't tell anyone but it's not as bad as what I thought. I was half expecting some nerd sacrifice at the beginning."

"You missed the sacrifice? Man. I was the one who got to gut him too. Don't worry though, they got it on video."

I couldn't help but laugh. "No thanks, I've seen enough guts in my life."

"When have you seen guts?" He looked really confused. I was definitely no science person and even if I was, our board is very Christian so we don't do many dissections here.

"None. And I plan to keep it that way."

"Smart ass." We awkwardly just stood there as people walked around us. "Well I gotta go. I'll see you later tonight, okay?"

"Okay."

And with that he bounced back over to where the other players were. For the first time since I had gotten here, people seemed to realize I existed. No one talked to me, but now that they saw me and Troye talking, they realized I wasn't dared to show up to this thing or something.

After my piss and refill, the game started up again. I tried keeping up and I did a lot better than I did in the first half, but to my avail I was lost when the fourth quarter started and the fouls were piled on. I heard some people around me talking and bonus and double bonus and I was just confused.

The only time during the game that I was actually excited at and knew what I was doing was when Troye threw the ball from half court, like he said he would, with seconds left on the clock and it went it. It was the game winning shot and everyone erupted. If I wasn't there, I would have never believed that I could get so excited for something so not me.

I wanted to congratulate Troye but the student section rushed the court and there was no way I could get to him. I knew Spencer and the others would be expecting me any second now so I went ahead and left. Troye told me he would see me later so hopefully I would. I went to his game so now, metaphorically, the ball is in his court and it's his turn to live up to his side of the deal.

I rushed over to the auditorium which is on the other side of campus and there were only a few people there who were working tech. Eventually Spencer and some of the actors and dancers showed up so I was able to start going over lines.

Whenever I wasn't the one who was supposed to be talking, I would occasionally glance over and watch Patrick with the dancers. Like I had guessed, he didn't have a phone for the 24 hours leading up to this show so his dancers were all freaking out. Thankfully Micah was on Patrick's side and helping him calm them down. He looked so cute all dressed up.

A short while before the show was about to begin, Spencer pulled me into her "dressing room," it's actually a large janitor's closet that they no longer used so she decided to convert it. The entire time we've been here, we've only been able to talk shop. I could tell if we didn't have some one on one, she would probably explode.

"Did you have fun at the game?" Spencer was sneering, she was positive that I would have a horrible time.

"It' actually wasn't that bad. Definitely not my crowd but the atmosphere was intense. Troye is going to have to explain some things to me. I don't understand the point system at all."

Spencer rolled her eyes. "For someone who can name everyone who won a Tony in 1983, you are pretty stupid. And how do you think Micah would feel about you and Troye getting all sweaty together."

"Well since Troye is straight, I don't think Micah would mind. He is definitely not the jealous type."

"You need to date a guy whose skin I can get under. It would make my life less stressful and much more enjoyable."

"That would make my life less enjoyable, I like seeing you all stressful. Stressful Spencer is a lot less scary than happy Spencer. If everything is working out for you then something bad is happening to someone in the world."

Spencer rolled her eyes. She then faced her mirror and started to apply her lipstick. "You think you are so funny, don't you?"

"As a matter of fact, I know I'm quite hilarious."

"Is this a bad time?" We both turned to see Micah at the door.

"Not at all!" Spencer said, her smile widened. "I'll leave you two alone. I need to go make sure Lauren has the correct cue sheet, I can't risk any fiascos out there tonight." Spencer then turned to me. "I hope you're ready for your first kiss. With me. Out there. Tonight."

Micah just kinda stood there, blushing. My jaw was on the floor, I couldn't believe she would say that. I had no idea how to recover from that. All I knew was that I was going to push her off stage. It may ruin the musical but it'd be worth it.

"So," Micah started to say, "I just wanted to wish you luck."

"Thanks. Good luck to you too."

"Are you going to the party after this?"

"Yeah. I kinda have to go. You know how Spencer gets, she would probably kill me if I ruined her plans."

"Yeah. I had to learn the hard way. Thanks for the warning and all."

I was scared he was mad but when I looked up into his eyes, I could see him smiling. "I would have warned you but, you know, she probably would have killed me. She likes to have the element of surprise when she corners her prey."

He just laughed. "I can't believe you would date her."

"She's pretty cool once you get to know her."

"I'd really like to." I hadn't notice until that point but Micah and I had been slowly moving towards each other. Micah was in far enough to shut the door to the room.

"I'd like it too." We kinda just stood there. We both knew that the musical was starting any minute but nothing really mattered. We were too infatuated with each other to give a shit. "You know, you look really cute right now."

Micah averted his eyes and just stared at the ground. "Thanks."

"No." I used my hand to lift his chin. "Thank you." I then did it. I leaned in. All the way. My lips. His lips. I kissed him.

Micah was obviously shocked but he kissed back once he had finally realized what I was doing. I then kinda pushed him up against the door and we began to make out. It was amazing. I don't know what made it amazing, but it was. I had never experienced something like that. I wanted more.

Before I could say or do anything, there was a bang on the door. "I know you two are enjoying yourselves but we need everyone now!" It was Spencer so we weren't too scared.

I had to apologize. "Sorry about that. I couldn't let Spencer be my first kiss."

"It's okay. I don't blame you."

Micah and I then joined the others to hear the same speech Ms. Dennis' gives before every performance. It was a tear jerker for the newbies but for those who have heard it multiple times now, we just smiled and nodded.

Minutes later, it was show time. We were starting the show with a big number; Remember My Name. One of the seniors, Grace Kittredge, was the lead but both Spencer and I were a part of the number too. This gave me the perfect opportunity to see if Troye was there.

The lights were all off as we ran onto stage to find our spots so I couldn't see any of the audience. The music then began and the lights came up. Since I actually had to perform, I couldn't look out there immediately, I had to wait for the most opportune moment. When it came, I knew it was too good to be true. The seat was empty. It was a quick glance, but I could read his name on the piece of paper reserving the seat for him.

I couldn't let it get to me. At least not while on stage. I quickly pushed it to the back of my mind and continued on with the piece. As it ended, the lights died down once more and we all shuffled again to be where we had to be, most of whom had to change into their audition clothes.

When I had reached my locker back stage, I almost broke down. I don't know why it mattered to me so much. It was just a show and he's just a friend. If he's serious about being friends again then there are plenty of more shows for him to sit through.

"You did great out there." Patrick said as he came up and hugged me. "You okay?"

"Yeah. It's just, you know, it's finally happened. All this work and I finally get to show the world what I've down with all you losers."

Patrick smiled and whenever he smiled, I couldn't help but smile too. "You are so sentimental, you know that?"

"Shut up and go put on your leotard."

"It's a unitard, thank you very much." And with that, he left me alone with myself.

I wasn't on for a while so after I had changed, I sat on the side and watched the performance. So far, everything was going great. It really was nice seeing all this work we've put in finally be shown but at the time none of that really mattered. The one person I was hoping to impress wasn't out there.

It was finally my turn to go out there and show the world that I'm the best Marco they will ever see. When I first went out, I was focused on the front row, but this time, I saw that the entire auditorium was filled. Every seat out there was pack. This is what I lived for. Not one person who broke a promise. I live to entertain the masses. Or at least I hope that's my calling in life. If not I may need to reevaluate my life plan.

Everything was going fantastic. I had forgotten all about Troye. That is, until I caught a glimpse of the same seat. This time, it wasn't empty. I immediately recognized his stupid face and his stupid smile. I so badly wanted to go down there and punch him. At the time, Troye missing however much he missed was a big deal to me and I was now furious at him now for making me feel the way I did.

Needless to say, I didn't. I remained in character and got through the rest of the scene. After that one was done, Spencer and I were done for the next twenty minutes or so. We sat back and watched everyone else do their thing.

One of my favorite scenes, the CarnEvil Dance, wowed the audience just as much as I thought it would. In the movie, the performance put on by the dancers was less than a minute, but with the amazing choreography of none other than Patrick Reeves, full time dancer and part time asshole friend, we were able to extend the number. I absolutely loved it, and it wasn't because both Patrick and Micah were in it, although they were definite pluses.

When it was finally my turn to go on stage again, it was time for me to sing Try. For all of those who haven't seen the movie, it is a very beautiful love song Marco sings to Jenny. Or course we altered the number some and it was a duet so Spencer could sing some of it, I didn't mind that at all, our voices went great together. When the song ended and Spencer and I shared our stage kiss, people cheered, louder than they probably should have. Only two shouts stood out to me. One was from Micah, standing close enough for me to see me but not the audience, I couldn't help but smile at him. The other was Troye. He was standing up and cheering the loudest out of anyone, now that I've gone to a game I can see why he'd be the loudest.

After that number, things continued on and the musical was a success. I couldn't believe how great everything was going, this really was the best performance yet. Even Ms. Dennis agreed and she had seen I don't know how many school plays in her lifetime.

The end of the play was nearing and it was time for me, Spencer, and Grace to sing the last song. Since this number was supposed to be the big performance at the end of the year in the musical, almost ever singer and dancer were out there, and trust me it was amazing.

After we had gone out for our standing ovations and the curtains had dropped, we all ran back stage to get ready for the party. Macy's parents coincidentally plan a weekend getaway that starts right after opening night so her place is where everyone goes. I'm pretty sure her parents know what goes on and don't want to get in the way of Macy, who can get even scarier than Spencer if she wanted to.

Lauren took me, Spencer, and Patrick out to Macy's. The entire ride there, all we could talk about was how great the show went. When Spencer said the word cue, both Patrick and I started to scream at her and make her shut up, the last thing we needed was Spencer critiquing her girlfriend and started World War Lesbian in front of me and Patrick.

When we got there, everything was already in full swing. The party was open to more than just the drama club so the place was packed. We entered the house and Patrick immediately dragged me into the kitchen, leaving Spencer and Lauren with some other chicks.

"You want something to drink?" Patrick asked me. He opened up the refrigerator and pulled out some Mike's Hard Lemonades.

I knew he and Spencer drank some when they came to these things but I had no desire. "No thank you. Does she have any water?"

Patrick smiled and dug in the fridge some more. He pulled out a water and handed it to me. "How am I supposed to be a bad influence on you when you won't do anything bad?"

"I don't know. Maybe you should step up your game some more."

Patrick smiled and his eyes glistened. "You know, all the cool kids drink. Even your boxer buddy."

"In that case..." I then flipped him off and he laughed. Instead of congratulating me on starting something with Micah, Patrick continued to tease me about Troye. I tried to not let it get to me but if only he knew he did pluck at some heart strings every time he mentioned Troye's name,

We returned to our lovely ladies and joined the conversation they were in. It was nice being in a different kind of scenery with these people. Usually when we were together, it was business, now I actually got to get to know some people I had never really talked to, like Heather and Justin. They were both sophomores and have been around as long as I have.

About fifteen minutes later, the music stopped. Everyone went dead silent. I was more than confused, the basketball game made more sense to me at the time. I noticed that everyone was staring at the door and when I turned to see what was going on, I saw the freshman. I had completely forgotten that the freshman show up together to the first party.

The crowd of high schoolerss then separated like the Red Sea and there was a path from the doorway to the middle of the room. The freshman weren't confused like me. They were straight up scared. When they reached the center, the Red Sea closed and left a large circle around the freshman.

"Welcome to the family!" One of the seniors shouted. That was followed by everyone at the party shouting right back at him. The music then resumed and everyone swarmed the freshman, hugging them and congratulating them for their first performance. This made me wish I had attended a party last year, even if it would have initially scared me shitless.

The party then resumed. Spencer and I danced together, like any normal couple would. I made sure there was no grinding or anything provocative because I knew who my ride was and I knew I'd be walking home if there was any contact with our no-no zones.

Somehow in all the madness called the dancefloor, I ended up dancing with Patrick. Neither of us were really scared because there were multiple "couples" who were just friends goofing off. It was a lot of fun dancing like an idiot with him, the worst and most embarrassing part would have to be when he decided to dance on me instead of with me. Of course everyone who wasn't plastered was cheering him on. I tried getting away but I couldn't move, some of the older guys made sure of that. It may have been embarrassing but it was also some of the most fun I had ever had so I didn't really mind being held there.

After that was over and I was able to go get another drink, I ran into Micah, who was talking to some of the senior dancers. Kevin, one of the out gay guys, was definitely flirting with him. I wanted to say something, but knew that I couldn't. Doing so would out both me and him. It would also affect Spencer and make people question her close friendship with Lauren.

"Jealous, aren't we?" I heard a female voice say.

I turned to see it was Macy. "What are you talking about?"

She sneered. "You think I'm stupid? I've seen the way you look at him. You have a thing for him don't you?" I think my silence spoke louder than anything because her smile widened. "I promise I won't break the news to Spencer that she's dating a fag."

I can't describe the pain. It felt like there was a hole in me. Macy had ripped something out of my chest and I didn't know what to do. I just stood there, hurting. I wanted to run outside and cry and scream. I also wanted to grab her by her hair and slam her head against the wall behind me.

"Remember this, Phillips. Whenever you try to upstage me again, I will use this against you. I refuse to let a lowly little sophomore steal my spotlight. Do you understand?"

I don't know why, but I nodded. I didn't want to. Like I said, there were other things I wanted to do, other things I wanted to say. I couldn't though. I don't know why. I just couldn't do anything other than nod.

Macy seemed content with my brainless nodding and then walked away. Once she was out of my sight, I immediately felt like throwing up. I ran outside and sure enough I started to throw up. Thankfully I didn't get a crowd and I was able to walk away from the now vomit-covered rose bush.

I couldn't go back in there. I knew Macy would play nice in front of people, but I couldn't pretend everything was alright and I'm an actor for crying out loud. I decided to do the only thing that seemed like a solution at the time.

About thirty minutes later, I could see him walking over to me. "Are you okay?" Troye asked me.

"Yeah. I just...I need to go home. Lauren brought me here but I don't want to ruin her fun." I wasn't telling him or myself the full truth though. I didn't think I could tell anyone inside the party what has happening. For some reason, all my trust lied in Troye.

"Okay. Come on."

Troye could tell something was wrong. During the ride, neither of us said anything. I made sure to text Spence and tell her than I has gotten sick and I had gotten someone to take me home. Other than that, both Troye and I just sat there.

When we got to my place, I kinda just sat there it the passenger seat. I didn't know how to say it, but I didn't want Troye to leave me alone.

"Do you want me to keep you company for a while?"

I just looked over at him.

I'm guessing that was enough because he sighed as he turned his car off. He then turned me to me and was smiling. "Okay. I'll stay for a bit. But I'm not carrying your ass in so you better be getting up."

Somehow I was able to muster up the strength to get out of the car and walk up to the door, Troye was at my side the whole time. I used my key and unlocked the door for us. Once in, we went downstairs to my room where I plopped down on my bed. Troye just stood there facing me.

"So," Troye said, "What's up? Do you want to talk about it?"

I looked at him. I wanted to. I really did. I knew I couldn't though. He was barely able to handle the fact that I wasn't jock, how would react to me being gay? "I can't. At least not right now."

"I know this is kind of late but you were amazing in the musical. I'd go see it a second time if I didn't have to hide in a trench coat to get into the auditorium."

Somehow I was able to smile. "You don't have to do that, you know right?"

"I think I do. If people saw me-"

"Why does that matter to you?" I didn't mean to interrupt him or come off as an asshole, but I definitely did.

"Because, I'm a jock and-"

"And what?! You're too good to go see musicals?! Are they too gay for you and all your jock friends?!" I was suddenly beyond pissed. I'm guessing most of it was because of Macy but I decided to aim all my anger at him.

"Calm down, Connor. I didn't mean-"

"What?! You didn't mean to hurt my feelings again?! You didn't mean to make this friendship sound like nothing of value?!"

"Will you please let me explain?!" The entire time I've known him, Troye had never yelled. But when he did, he definitely shut me up.

For a second I thought he was going to punch me so I flinched. When I opened my eyes, his face was red, but there were tears forming in his eyes. He wasn't angry. He was sad.

"I've tried so hard to make this friendship work. You have no idea how much shit I get for talking to you from the other basketball players. Today when I gave you a hug in the gym, they made sure to make fun of me for it. I wasn't going to go to the musical because I knew it' make everything worse tomorrow but then I thought of how I made you a promise. I suddenly didn't care about what they had said. I got to the auditorium as quickly as I could to see my friend sing and act his ass off. You make me who I want to be, Connor. I don't have to be something else to impress you."

Suddenly, all my problems were pushed onto the back burner; the name Macy had no meaning to me. "Why do you let them tell you what you can and can't do?"

"I don't know. I just feel like I always have to. It's how everything is supposed to be."

"The way things are supposed to be? Things are supposed to be what we want them to be. You should always be you, Troye. You shouldn't let anyone tell you want to do, not even me."

Troye sat down next to me on my bed. He was crying at this point, but not too much to continue talking. "That's easy for you to say. You're a lot tougher than me."

I smiled. "You think I'm tough?"

He looked up and me and smiled when he saw me smiling. "Well yeah. You aren't afraid to be you. I do whatever I'm supposed to do so I fit in with jocks."

"I'm not strong, Troye. If I was, I wouldn't have called you today."

"Strength isn't just standing up for yourself. It's also knowing when to admit you can't stand up on your own and get help. Me, I fold under pressure and let it crush me. I never think of getting help."

"Well, remember that I'm always here for you. I'm not going to let anyone tell you what you can and can't do. I don't care how many girls I have to fight and how many guys I have to have a stern talking to, I will help you."

Troye let out a single laugh. "Thanks." We then sat there in the quiet for a bit. I knew I should tell him what I needed to, but I didn't want to ruin the moment. He just told me he does whatever the other jocks think he should do, and they would all leave if their friend told them they were gay. "Are those my boxers?"

I looked up and sure enough, he was pointing to him boxers on the coffee table. "I've been meaning to give those back to you but I kept forgetting."

"It's cool. And to be honest, those briefs I borrowed, they feel really nice. I'm actually wearing them right now." He lowered the waistband of his shorts a little and I could see the neon green material. I couldn't help but smile.

"Can I tell you something?" I wasn't going to tell him my big secret. I was going to tell him something about his boxers.

"Sure. What is it?"

"It's about your boxers." He gave me a weird look. "It's nothing strange, I promise."

"Okay, I trust you. So you can trust me."

"I haven't wanted to give them back to you. The fact that they are here, I know you and I will remain friends because you will always have at least one reason to come over. And I don't want to lose you again. I've lost so much and I don't know if I could handle losing you too."

I was waiting for him to do what I thought he'd do, laugh and reassure me we'd be friends no matter what. Instead of hearing his laugh, I felt his hand on my cheek as he turned me to face him. Instead of hearing him tell me everything would be okay, I felt his lips against mine as he kissed me. I was obviously shocked more than anything. It took me a minute but I began to kiss back.

We continued to kiss and he eventually laid me down and got on top of me, continuing to kiss me. I was so lost in the moment. There was nothing else in the world. No one else existed. It was just me and Troye. And I loved it. I loved the feeling of our bodies pressed against each other as five years of crushing hard on someone was finally released.

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Every time I read a story of Nifty, I never read the top part, so just in case you are like me and only read the bottom portion if you liked the story, here is my email again: wah.stories@yahoo.com. If you email me, please state what story you're referring to. Thanks for reading and I hope you have a fantastic day. :)

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