Philo was mad at me for some reason.
It didn't really make sense.
On Saturday, after I fucked him on the trampoline, things began to unwind. It all started when he started to talk about the future. I said I still wanted to get married to the right girl, which made him get all bitchy again. I don't know what he expected. He's my best friend, not my girlfriend. I mean, we fucked. Twice. But it's not...permanent. Doesn't he get that? Doesn't he appreciate how hard this was for me? Not only did I forgive him for lying to me, but then I indulged his dreams. But that's not enough for him, no. Now he wants me to be gay. Like, as a lifestyle. Look, I'm open-minded. I'm willing to experiment. But like hell am I letting gay become part of my identity. That isn't me. I ain't no fairy! God, Philo is so ridiculous!
Then all this shit came pouring out about how I hate myself or something and he complained about me using the word faggot, and then I sort of called him a faggot again, and he stormed out, crying like a little—well, you know.
But whatever! Honestly, I don't even care! It doesn't fucking matter! I should never have forgiven that chicken shit carcass in the first place; I should have just let Neal rape him in the janitorial room; I should have just left all the skeletons in the closet where they belong.
I finished showering. Today was a miserable Monday as always, and I wanted nothing more than to get away from everything. Far away. Oceans away.
"Hey Viren," Neal whispered.
"Shut the fuck up," I snarled.
"So what happened after you carried Philo out of the locker room? I heard you carried your pussyboy home with you. Have some fun playing with his open holes?"
"FAGGOT!" I screamed, slamming Neal into the locker; he fell to the floor and I kicked him in the stomach. I snarled, ready for more, but then I felt someone pulling me back.
"Easy, there," Joe whispered. "C'mon, this is Neal. He's our friend, remember?"
"He's a cocksucking piece of shit!" I yelled.
"Please, Viren. I need your help with something," Joe whispered.
"Fine," I said, glaring at Neal one last time as we left. I gave Joe a silent ride to my house.
When we got there, Joe cleared his throat. "You shouldn't have done that. I don't care what he did to deserve it," he said quietly.
"I'm not talking about it," I said shortly. "So what do you need help with?"
"Can you help me ask out Maria?" Joe asked meekly.
"Maybe?" I said, scowling. "I don't think she thinks particularly highly of me."
"Sure she does," Joe said. "The entire reason she likes Philo is because she trusts you. You tried to set them up, right?"
"That doesn't make any sense," I said slowly.
"Well, whatever," Joe said. "I like her. But we never hang out for some reason."
I sighed. "If you want, I could ask her over right now. I'm sure she would come."
"See what I mean?" Joe said, rubbing my hair. "She is a slave for you."
"Not really," I said, blushing slightly.
I started to text Maria and tell her I needed her advice about something.
Joe laughed. "So, when do I get to know what is going on with you? With Neal? With Philo?"
"Neal was making Philo uncomfortable, so I made Neal uncomfortable. That's all you need to know."
"And that's all?" Joe asked, raising his eyebrows.
"Yes, it's fucking all!" I growled.
"Okay, okay," Joe said, smirking.
"What are you so smug about?" I said, glaring.
"Nothing," Joe said. "It's just there are some rumors."
"Like what?" I said.
"Like that Neal sucked you off, then beat up Philo when he tried to steal you away--"
"Neal never sucked me off!" I yelled.
"And Philo?" Joe said.
"I didn't say nothing about Philo!"
"Yeah..." Joe said.
He scanned my eyes.
"Don't feel bad," Joe whispered. "Who could pass up a sweet and eager cocksucker? Hell, don't trip. Everyone experiments. I might have even let Neal help me out a few times."
"What?" I yelled.
"Or maybe I didn't," Joe said, smirking. "Doesn't really matter, right?"
I just stared at him until the doorbell rang.
"Hey Maria. Oh, this is Joe. Joe, Maria."
"Hello," Maria said, her accent emphasizing the hell.
"Hello," Joe said, his stupidity emphasizing the oh.
"So how do you know Viren, Joe?" Maria asked.
"We played little league back before we found better sports. I don't know why we still hang out though. We don't really have anything in common, and he is sort of irritable." Joe turned to me, grinning, and raised his eyebrows.
Maria smiled. "No one has anything in common with him, because he isn't human. He's a clam."
Joe laughed. "Then don't clams have something in common with him?"
Maria rolled her eyes. "He's an outcast clam that not even the clams could love."
"At least he's pretty, I guess?" Joe said weakly.
"Thanks guys," I said. "It's great to feel loved."
"Not even clams," Maria repeated. "So how did it go with Philo?" Maria asked.
"Viren's still pretending nothing happened," Joe said.
"Still?" Maria said, chuckling again.
"Hey, knock it off guys," I said. "How about you, Maria? How does Gina feel knowing you come over to my house whenever I call?"
"She feels no difference whatsoever."
"Because you don't tell her," I said.
"I don't see what good that information would do her," Maria said.
"So maybe you don't need to know about Philo," I said.
"He seems upset again. I thought that was why you texted? You said you needed advice?"
I looked down.
"Look, you can mope over the weekend. Right now, talk to me," Maria said.
"Philo wants something I can't give. It's as simple as that."
Maria shook her head. "Philo wants love. He loves you. You have no love to give?"
I just looked at her.
"This is Viren we are talking about," Joe said. "He's a fighter, not a lover."
"Well, maybe you can rub off on him a bit," Maria said, looking at the floor. "Joe, did Philo talk to you about this weekend?"
"No," he said.
"Well, we were going to go to his beach house," Maria said. "I'll see if I can get you to go. I think he could use a friend like you."
"Wait, you guys are going to the ocean?" I said. "Damn it."
"I would ask you to go too, Viren, except Philo probably doesn't want you to be there because you are a bastard."
"He's more like an orphan," Joe said. "Seriously, do you even have parents? I can't even remember anymore."
The rest of the day was like that.
That being said, Tuesday still came too quickly.
Things went tediously smooth until my last class.
My teacher wouldn't let me in; apparently I needed to see the counselor. I reeled at the sight of Neal inside. I thought about leaving, but then I bit my tongue and entered. The sooner the better.
"Hello Viren. I am Mr. Misty."
"Hey," I said softly.
"Do you know what homophobia means?"
I scowled at him. "Homo means same, and phobia means fear. So it must mean fear of being the same. I guess that makes it a synonym for adventurous?"
"No," Mr. Misty said. "Homophobia is discrimination against gay people."
"No one could figure that out from the root words," I said, sneering. "That has nothing to do with same or fear."
"The behavior is derived from fear," Mr. Misty said.
"You have no evidence for that. Maybe the behavior is derived from hate," I said, glaring.
"Fear and hate have a known relationship," he said, stoic.
"So do fear and love," I said.
"So do you think you are homophobic because you hate gay people—or because you love them?"
"I'm not homophobic! Jesus!"
"Tell me what happened between you and Neal," he said softly.
I glared at Neal, who was looking intently at his shoes. "Neal begged me to let him suck me off. I said no. He got depressed about how desperate and pathetic he was and beat himself up."
"I don't think that is what happened," Mr. Misty said.
Neal frowned. "Can I talk to Viren alone?"
"Well, not in my office. I can't really stop you from leaving though, I suppose."
Our eyes met and we left.
"Is that what you wanted?" Neal asked, as he followed me toward my car. "You wish I would get down on my knees and beg for you? Because that's not out of the question, man."
"Are you for real?" I asked.
"You are a stud, Viren," Neal said. "I'd do that for you."
"Get in the car," I said.
He obeyed. Then he cleared his throat. "You want me to suck you off?"
"I'll pass," I whispered.
"Did you pass with Philo?"
My face wrinkled. "That's different."
"Welll why not, Viren? I like sex. You like sex. Try me out."
"I'm not that easy to get with Neal! I'm not a slut."
"Yes you are!" Neal yelled. "That's exactly what you are."
"Look Neal, it was a one-time thing with Philo. I'm not doing anything with any other guys."
"Do you know what you sound like, Viren?" Neal asked, frowning.
"No Neal," I said shaking my head, and opening my eyes sarcastically wide. "What do I sound like?"
"Monogamous," Neal said. "You sound like Philo is your one and only. You wouldn't do anything with any other guys. What, so you are more devoted to him than any girlfriend you've ever had?"
"Now you are putting words in my mouth," I said.
"Well, there are other things I could put in your mouth if you'd let me," Neal whispered.
"Don't delude yourself," I said. "If we ever were to do anything, it would involve you being my bitch and me fucking the shit out of one of your holes."
"So you admit there is a chance?" Neal said.
"No; there's no chance. You deserve someone that is at your maturity level."
"Thanks, I guess," Neal said.
I shook my head.
"When we get to my place, if I tie you down to the bed, will you do anything I ask?"
"Hell yeah," Neal said.
"Then listen close."
An hour later, the door clanked open and Aaron came inside.
"Hey, Viren," he mumbled, trying to walk past.
"Not so fast," I said, smirking. "I need a word."
Aaron paused and looked at me, his eyes twinkling and searching.
"What?" he said softly.
"You said you needed to stop falling for my friends. Which ones, other than Philo have you had feelings for?"
His face turned red. "Well, Joe's smile makes me go weak at the knees," he mumbled.
"And Neal?" I asked.
"Neal is—scary," Aaron said softly. "And beautiful. He makes me a little crazy actually. I feel sort of uncomfortable around him, but it's sort of an excited uncomfortable, if that makes any sense."
"And if I said I tied his naked, `beautiful' body to your bed, what would you say?"
"What?" Aaron whispered. "Seriously Viren, what the fuck?"
Aaron ran to his room and wrenched open the door.
Neal's arms and legs were each tied to a bedpost, stretching his flexing, naked body. The only way he could struggle was by bobbing his ass up and down. It didn't have the desired effect.
Neal had a really buff ass. As he writhed around, he kept pushing it into the air. His screams were muffled into the boxers I had shoved in his mouth, which made it sound like he was moaning.
Aaron gaped, the bulge in his shorts betraying him.
He slowly draped his arm over Neal's back.
Neal relaxed to the touch, sighing. Aaron looked at me, uncertain. "What—is going on here?"
"Whatever you want, Aaron."
Aaron looked at Neal, and slowly leaned in, closing his eyes. He planted a soft kiss on his back, and Neal tensed up. Aaron's mouth sucked and leaked all along the small of Neal's back, and then along the cheeks of his supple ass. Aaron molded Neal's ass cheeks apart and buried his face inside.
Neal and I gasped in unison.
"Fuck Aaron," I said, slightly turned on by the sight of my brother licking, sucking, and slurping on my friend's hole. Neal was whimpering and shaking.
Pretty soon Neal was pushing back into my brother's face and Aaron's tongue was digging inside.
"Damn, Aaron, stop teasing the cunt and fuck it."
"Can I?" he whispered.
"You can do whatever you want, to him, bro," I said.
Aaron lips quivered as he looked at Neal. "I want to hear him say it."
I slid onto the bed, my crotch near Neal's face, as I pulled the boxers out of Neal's mouth. His eyes met mine, then Aaron's. "You can do whatever you want with me, Aaron. You're my hero."
"See?" I said, but then I shivered as something unexpected happened.
Neal started to suck on me through my clothes.
I slapped him hard in the face.
"You are so hot when you are angry," Neal whispered. "That day you beat me up—I came so hard that night. Don't you see Viren? I don't need your love. I just need your sex. That's what you want isn't it? I'll accept what Philo couldn't. I'm not a whore, offering sex and expectimg money, or status, or—love. I just want empty, hot sex where you get angry and fuck my body up. Fuck me," he said.
I slapped his face harder, and he moaned. "Yeah, that's right."
"You are such a pervert," I said, slapping his face again. The lake of red blush was beginning to grow where his face stung.
"Stop it!" Aaron yelled. "What are you doing?" he said.
"He kissed me through my shorts," I said softly.
"Well who the fuck wouldn't? And don't you think you set him up just slightly?" Aaron glared at me. "Besides," he said, his voice cracking, "It's obvious he is more into you than he is to me. I'm just a younger, inferior version of you." He started crying again.
Then he stormed away.
"You fucking cunt!" I yelled, slapping Neal again. "I told you to make Aaron into your hero! What the fuck are you sucking my cock for?"
Neal smirked. "And you were so sure Aaron would make me into his bitch. Too bad too—I'd be such a good little bitch. Not begging for love and commitment. Just empty holes."
I scowled and Neal sighed, continuing. "I guess I am just too masculine for your brother to see me as the cock slut I am. Oh well. If someone doesn't put me in my place soon, maybe I will show your brother just how much of a man I can be. How do you think his ass feels around your cock, I wonder?"
"You are such a bitch," I said growling.
"Prove it," he whispered.
I just stood there.
"I'm beginning to wonder if you even have the power to stop me from fucking your brother. It sure seems like he has it bad for me. I could tap that piece of ass. Yum. Thanks for giving me the idea, Viren. You are a true friend."
My voice got quiet. "Joe said I was wrong to beat the shit out of you."
"Joe!" Neal yelled, laughing. "Joe would fuck me right now. Because he's a man. I guess you are just a faggot. Too feminine to fuck an eager bitch."
My pulse was dragging, my cock was hard, anger beat through my throat, my hair, my chest. This FUCKING piece of shit bitch! He was going DOWN.
I have been having some writer's block, and any message might help. Seriously. Anyway, email me: krazytop@gmail.com. Thanks, and peace.