The following story was originally written for a german website and later printed in my first book "Der Neuanfang". After I translated my story "Never saw a miracle" into english and getting lots of good feedback, I decided to translate this story, too. Some readers wrote me that I don't have to apologize for my English -- so I won't anymore g.
The story is set in Germany, so of course there are a few things unfamiliar to people from other countries. As example temperatures are given in degrees centigrade: 0 C are 32 F, minus 5 C are 23 F and so on. If there are any things you don't understand, please feel free to ask me about it. I love getting emails anyway, and I'd like to say my thankyous to all of you who already wrote me.
There are two other stories of mine published here on niftys:
"Never saw a miracle" in the gay/highschool section
and
"Different" in the gay/no-sex section
If someone is interested in reading the original german story, it's here:
http://www.nickstories.de
Look for "Peter's Stories". And if some is interested in buying my books (in german language, of course): they can be bought directly from me, even with my signature which will be worth millions when I'm a Nobel prize winner someday -- lol...
I'm sorry for the delay, but with job, family and especially the Olympics I didn't have much time on my hands to translate.
But now let the play begin...
--*
A new beginning -- Part 18
Copyright 2001-2006 by Peter Conrad, Peter_Co@web.de
Monday again, meaning getting up much too early after a much too short weekend. Some scienties had found out that it would be better for school to start later, like around 9am. That would be nice, sleeping in a bit even on school days. But on the other hand it would mean that the day at school would last even longer into the afternoon. That would mean that the whole day would be wasted. Shit. But knowing the german bureaucracy the starting hour wouldn't change before I was done not even with the school but with university, too.
We had spent the sunday quietly, I was missing my newfound love very much, and it was the same with poor Tom and his Veronika. In the morning I had shown him how to burn cds, in the afternoon the whole family went to one of my favourite places: sauna. It was great, but I still was missing Flip terribly.
But back to monday. As usual my group of friends met infront of the still locked school doors, and finally I was able to hug and kiss my Philipp again! Well, it would have been nice to do so, but of course I didn't do it, I just greeted him like my other friends. I didn't want to out him to the others, and I guess because Flip was very careful himself nobody noticed anything about our relationship. When the others asked us about our weekend we gave a censored version, and even Thomas managed to not spill out the secret.
While we were talking about everything and nothing I once thought that I heard a whispered "Look at the faggots!" when other students walked by, but I wasn't really sure if I heard it correctly. And if someone said such a thing I was sure it was only about one faggot -- me. It wasn't the first time that such a thing had happened, so I just forgot it as usual. Then it was time to go into the school.
During the first few hours more and more strange things happened. The looks from passing students, kissing noises, whispering behind our backs. And this time I was sure it wasn't only about me but about Philipp, too! We both got more and more nervous, and the worst thing was that we couldn't talk about it because we never were alone!
At the last break before the big lunch break we were totally nervous wrecks. We didn't know what was happening -- okay, I had my suspicions, some had found out about Flip and me. But how? We were so careful, and I totally trusted the few who already knew about us. Judging from his looks Thomas was as surprised as we were.
But soon the mysterie was solved, and as usual it was Lisa with her secret sources who did so. She took Flip and me aside and whispered to us.
"Is it true? Are you together now?"
Time for two head to turn inredibly red. We looked at each other and decided that there was no hiding anymore. We didn't manage to tell her, we only nodded our heads.
"So it is really true. You're the number one topic for half of the school -- and when the day's over you'll be the number one topic for the whole school."
"But ... how ... I mean ... we were so careful!"
"Yes, but I guess only here at school. I've heard about a wild kissing szene in an elevator."
"Shit!"
Such swearing didn't go well with good little Flip, but this time I had to agree with him. I guess the young mother wasn't the only one who caught us when I payed Philipps consulting fee. Someone who knew us had seen it, and this someone had talked about it at school.
"Looks like you know what I'm talking about."
"Yes, you're right. Do you know who started the talking?"
"Not really, but I think it started in the 9th grade this morning, and now the news about you are running wild through the whole school."
I looked at Flip, whose face was a haunted mask. Okay, for I would have liked nothing more than to shout out my love for him, I wanted everyone to know -- but not this way! And definitely not against Flips wishes.
"If it helps you a bit: I'm happy for you two. But I guess you're not very happy about the situation, are you?"
We didn't need to answer, because our next teacher showed up and started the lesson. It went by very slowly, and because a few of our classmates had witnessed the little talk between Lisa and us the whispering now also started in our own class. It became so much that the teacher had to quiet the class down.
Then the lesson was over. The bell rang, and the teacher left the room. Against the usual routine not all of the others run out of the room, a few stayed back, and an uncomfortable silence spread in the room. Then Jurgen came over to Philipp and me, making a serious face.
"I can't believe it. That's something I didn't expect, especially not from you, Danny!"
I stared at him with big eyes. What was he talking about?
"Can you tell me why the best friends are the last ones to hear the good news? Hmpf! But okay, I guess I'll forgive you this time. Congratulations, to both of you."
This was the end of the awkwardness, now everyone rushed in on us and gratulated us. Everyone talked at the same time, and both on Flips face and mine small smiles showed up.
Slowly one after the other left the room for lunch break, and finally Philipp and I were alone in the room.
"What a day. Can you manage, Flip?"
"Do I have a choice? I don't think so. I guess I just have to manage. Doesn't it disturb you?"
"Oh yes! I don't really care that everyone knows about us, but I'm really not happy about how it happened. I'd liked it more if it had happened on our own terms, and you know that I would never had rushed you into outing yourself."
"I know. And I also know how hard it was for you to hide it. Shit, I would have loved to tell it everyone myself, but I guess I'm just a big wuss. Who knows when I would have been ready to come out. If ever."
"You would have been ready some day. And I would have waited for you."
"Thanks. But I guess we don't have to wait any longer, someone else made the decision for us."
"And what will we do know?"
"As my dad always says: attack is the best defense."
"Know I now from whom you got your bright head..."
"Danny, I know that you worry about me, how I will get through it. It really isn't easy for me, it's so totally new. A few days ago I wasn't ready to come out to myself, to acknowledge that I'm gay. And now I have the best boyfriend in the world! And you know what? Together with this best boyfriend in the world I'll get through. Just promise me to never let me alone, okay?"
"You can count on it! I'll never let you go!"
At the next moment Flip hugged me and his lips found mine. We didn't have much time for it, but still we enjoyed it. This was the moment which gave us back courage and security.
"Now I'll survive everything, Danny."
"Me too. Let's go to lunch?"
"Yes. Believe it or not, I just found my appetite again."
With these words Philipps left hand grabbed his school bag, his right hand grabbed my left, then he dragged me through the door, out of the room and into the hall. I just had time to grab my one bag. Immediatly we again were in the middle of attention, and under the looks of at least a dozen students we started our way to the cafeterie. Hand in hand. Into a future we didn't know what to expect from. But into a future we knew one thing about: we would face it together...
..*
Epilogue -- a few months later, on my 18th birthday
"Danny, look, there are Ralph and Christoph."
Really, there they were, some ten rows in front of us. After the famous party at Katjas the two boys were inseparable and faced their coming out together. Real role models for gay teenagers. Now they both were 16, and they sat not far away from us in the cinema, waiting for the movie to start.
Tim and I had reserved four places in the far back, in the last row, and we were waiting for the two missing people.
"What do you think, Tim, did we choose the right movie?"
"He, you were the one who wanted one which doesn't need much attention. A cuddle movie."
Of course he was right.
"But I don't know if it really was a good idea to send those two to get the popcorn. I just hope they'll be here before the movie starts."
I was hoping this, too. Those two together? But okay, we still had a few minutes.
The last few months were very exciting, since the hasty move in of Tim and his dad the life of mom and me had totally changed. We had to get used to not living alone anymore, that there were two more people around. We had to learn how to show consideration for the others. But we managed to get used to each other quite quickly. Tim soon felt very at home, both at his new house and at school. He soon found a lot of new friends, and he, with a big brother like me, what could go wrong?
Reinhardt was the big anchor for all of us. With him working at home he was the one who always was there to lend an ear and to help with problems. He and mom were happy like on the first day, and six weeks from now wedding bells will be heard! After that the two would go on a honeymoon cruise -- leaving the house to Tim and me! Party 24/7! Not really, but he, boys will be boys!
Mom was more happy and wellbalanced than I had ever seen her since my dads death, and she even won a big architecture prize. She was totally doting on Tim (without giving me the feeling to be left out), and Tim felt the same way about her.
And myself? Well, it had happened what I was afraid of. I often was told what a good student Tim was, what good grades he brought home. Okay, it wasn't really serious, it was more like funny teasing, but still, it pushed my ambitions, and my average grade jumped up to 1.5.
Tim and I became more and more like real brothers. No. Not LIKE real brothers, we became real brothers. And best friends. There were no secrets, no bad words, nothing. It was like we had a deeper connection with each other, it often happened that one of us ended the sentence the other started. It now was impossible for me to understand how I survived 17 years without him.
My little brother was still shy, but not as much as at the beginning of our friendship. And what was left of his shyness made him even more cute and interesting. But he lost something else, something nobody wanted to come back: his self-loathing. In this point he was a totally new boy, and when the topic came to his "mother" his only comment was now "that stupid bitch doesn't know what she left behind". He was sooooo right!
Tim had used the last summer to work on his biggest project. He wanted to cure me from my fear of water! That's why a very enthusiastic Tim and a much less enthusiastic Danny were often found on the lake. And my scepticism was very justified, seeing his teaching methods. When my stubborness got to much for him he dived and stole my bathing suit! (Remember: never wear those wide shorts, it wouldn't have happened if I had on speedos!) Then he swam with my suit in hands to a small island in the middle of the lake. Now I had the choice to follow him to the island -- or to swim back to the beach naked. A beach with lots of people around. I decided to swim to the island, and surprisingly I survived! What a nice little brother he was. But I had to admit that after this day I wasn't that afraid of water anymore. I even learned to swim quite well, and -- I'll never admit it to Tim! -- I even enjoy it, just a little bit. Who would have thought...
Well, this was it. This was the story of the new beginning. A new beginning for everyone of us, one which made everyones life happier and richer. Exactly 12 months ago an accident by pure chance started it, and today I was more sure than ever before that Reinhardt spilling coke on my jeans was destiny. But you know what? Destiny is only one side of the medal. It isn't enough to wait for your destiny, for your luck, for your love. You have to work for it, too, or you'll never make it. Reinhardt and mom, Tim and I, we did it -- and look at the results!
By the way, I not only learned swimming from Tim but something else, too. I call Reinhardt "dad" now. God was he a happy camper when I said it for the first time! I had thought about it for weeks, and first I thought it would be kind of a betrayel to my real dad. But later I realized that my real dad had loved me, and that he would be happy for me being able to live a normal life again. He would be happy for mom and me, that we found someone who loves us like he did when he was still alive. So now it wasn't "Reinhardt" anymore, it was "dad". Well, and Tim even sooner started to call mom "mom". At the day of the upcoming marriage everything will become legal: Reinhardt will adopt me, mom will adopt Tim. And I will be Danny Bergner from this day one -- doesn't sound to bad, does it?
The excitement at school about Flip and I being a couple faded fast. It now was normal to see us together, even holding hands and sometimes kissing. Of course there still were a few stupid jerks who had their problems with us, but they were so in minority that they didn't become a problem. And if something started to come up our friends took good care of it. All together the situation at our school became so good, that even Katjas little brother Ralph came out to everyone and now often was seen together with his boyfriend Christoph.
Well, it's time for them to finally show up, the lights will go out soon. Ah, there they are! Tim and I each got a bucket of popcorn, then we were taken in the middle. Just in time. The lights went out, the curtain opened, and Tim whispered into my ear.
"Have fun, birthday boy."
Then he turned to the other side, put his left arm around his girlfriend and started to do what you usually do in the last row in a dark theater with your loved one at your side.
And I? I turned to my right side, where Flip, the cutest boy on this planet and within a few hundred lightyears was longingly waiting for me to give him the same attention Tim gave his Veronika. And I'd never dare to disappoint him! So now you have to excuse me, I have more important things to do than writing this story. Go out and get a life!
..*
PS: I can almost hear it. Everyone is asking the same question. "How can this Philipp dare to steal that cute Danny?"
Well, folks, I'm sorry, but I'm taken now. DANNY ISN'T ALONE ANYMORE! If you want to complain you have to do it to god. Whatever. There is nothing you could do to change it. I'm happier than I ever was before, and I plan on getting old with Philipp together. But VERY slowly! But our life together is another story. A story I might tell you someday later. But not today. Now, be quite, please. The advertising is over, the main movie starts. Not that I'll see much of it... ;-)
..*
That's all, folks. Thanks for reading my story, special thanks to all of you who wrote me about it.
A special "Thank you" goes to nifty for giving me not only a space to read great stories but to publish some of my own stories, too. And if you, my dear reader, are able to donate a few bucks for keeping nifty alive, I'd be even more thankful :-)
Best wishes from Germany to all of you, Peter