Obligatory warnings and disclaimers:
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If reading this is in any way illegal where you are or at your age, or you don't want to read about male/male relationships, go away. You shouldn't be here.
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The X-Men and any related characters are property of Marvel Comics, trademarked and registered and copyrighted and all that. I'm using them without permission.
For those who read the comics and worry about such things, this story takes place in the (much simpler and easier to follow) Ultimate X-Men universe, right around issue 54. If you don't want to dig out your copy, the team at that time is Jean Grey, Cyclops, Iceman, Kitty Pryde, Nightcrawler, Colossus, Angel, and Dazzler.
Comments can be sent to "dustyh75@hotmail.com"
Thanks.
Seth blinked at Scott in confusion, trying to understand what he'd just said.
"Last night?" he asked, his face puzzled. "I didn't meet anyone last night.
I wasn't even awake last night. When did you?"
"OK, slow down, please," Scott stammered, holding up his hands. "Jean said that when she talked to you on the plane, in your head, she gave you a little push to stay asleep, because her and the Professor thought you needed rest. The Professor also thought your exam would go better if you were completely calm, and then when it was over we just decided to let you sleep in there all night."
Seth nodded. He and Scott were facing each other on the bed now, Seth still with his knees drawn up and his head resting on top of them and Scott sitting Indian style, talking with his hands. The circle of light from the lamp on the end table wasn't really hitting them, and Seth realized that he felt really comfortable even though Scott seemed nervous as hell all of a sudden. Scott ran a hand through his hair, pulling his t-shirt tight across his chest as Seth tried not to think of Jean's boyfriend that way.
"I know all that already," Seth said carefully. He didn't want to sound rude, but he didn't need to hear the part of the story he already knew. "How did you, I mean, what happened?"
"You were having some kind of dream," Scott answered. Oh, yeah, "some kind of dream" all right. The wet kind. "I don't always sleep well, and I was walking the building, just doing a perimeter."
Seth giggled.
"What?" Scott asked, cocking his head to the side. His eyes were impossible to read with those glasses on, and he kept his face pretty impassive. Seth hadn't ever known anyone so tightly wound. Even the way he was sitting was controlled. Sure, his legs were neatly folded, but his back was ramrod straight. The only time his posture faltered was when he started talking about whatever had happened the night before, and got all flustered.
"Nothing," Seth answered, finally smiling a little. "You just sounded like a soldier or something for a second."
"Sometimes we are," Scott said softly, looking down. Seth swallowed hard, a lump rising in his throat. There were things here he didn't know, and he wasn't the only one here who had been in pain before. Jean had mentioned that they had lost a friend recently, a member of the family, and Seth remembered seeing the Beast's death on television, but was that it? Or was Scott talking about something else?
"Anyway, what happened last night?" Seth asked, breaking the mood. Scott sighed.
"Like I said, you were asleep, but you were making noise, so I went in to check on you, and when I got to the bed you were talking in your sleep a little."
"I do that, sometimes," Seth said, blushing. They both smiled.
"Anyway, I thought you were awake, but you were just being noisy," Scott said, his voice getting lower. He fidgeted a little, and his voice started to speed up. "Anyway, I went in to look at you, and your sheet was kind of falling off, so I grabbed it to pull it up and my hand kind of touched you and that was it."
He'd said the last part so fast that Seth felt like he needed to replay it in his head to sort all the words out.
"What else happened?" Seth asked.
"Nothing!" Scott blurted, tensing. He started to get up, and Seth's voice stopped him cold.
"You're lying."
"What?" Scott asked, blinking.
"You're lying," Seth answered simply. "You said that you knew I could touch people and use my power on them without hurting them because you touched me last night. If nothing happened, you wouldn't know that. Scott, I need to know this. You know that. Just, please, tell me what happened."
Scott sighed, and nodded.
"You're going to get upset," he began, and mentally kicked himself. Of course Seth would get upset now that he was expecting to hear something upsetting. "I, um, I kind of didn't tell the Professor this part, because I didn't think he needed to know the specifics of the, uh, the incident."
"We had an incident?" Seth asked. Sure enough, he was starting to get upset. "What does that even mean?"
"Do you remember what kind of dream you were having last night?" Scott asked. He was looking right at Seth, and even through the glasses he felt Scott's eyes pinning his own. "Do you remember what you were dreaming about?"
Seth was about to ask why that mattered, and then it hit him. Last night he'd had a dream about a man, someone he didn't know, the same kind of dream he'd had before, dozens of times. He'd been alone, and the man had been near him, and then they'd started to touch each other.
"Oh God! Oh God oh shit!" Seth blurted, jumping up off the bed. He didn't care if Scott knew that he was gay. They'd all find out about that at some point, anyway, if he lived here long enough, but was Scott trying to tell him that? That his dream hadn't quite been just a dream? "Oh, God you felt that? You and I, we did?"
He wasn't even forming complete sentences, and Scott grabbed his shoulders before he could bolt out of the room.
"Seth!"
"Oh, God, I didn't mean to," Seth said quietly, still trying to pull away from Scott. There wasn't any way to resist his power, which meant that when Scott had touched him, he'd forced himself on Scott. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."
"SETH!" Scott said again, his fingers digging into Seth's shoulders through the t-shirt. Both of them jerked to a stop, Scott's sharp yell cutting through Seth's moment of panic. "What happened wasn't your fault. Are you listening to me? It wasn't your fault."
"But I, did I make you?" Seth asked, swallowing. He felt dizzy, like he was going to pass out. "I'm so sorry, Scott. I'm sorry."
"Stop," Scott said, leading him back toward the bed. "Just, um, take a deep breath, and listen to me for a minute, ok? What happened when I touched you, you wouldn't have done that if you were awake, would you? You wouldn't make someone do that unless they wanted to, right?"
"I, no, but Scott."
"No," Scott said again, holding up his hands. They were both sitting on the bed now, leaning toward each other. "You just agreed with me that you have nothing to apologize for. What happened was an accident, that's all."
They were both quiet for a few moments, sitting on the bed. Scott listened to Seth's breathing, listened to it slow as he calmed himself down.
"Are you ok?" Scott asked finally. Seth's face was blank when he finally looked up.
"Why aren't you mad at me?" Seth asked, biting his bottom lip.
"Why would I be mad at you? I just told you, it was an accident."
"Yeah, but, um," Seth began, swallowing uncomfortably again. He was starting to feel like someone was force feeding him giant chalky pills that just wouldn't go down. "I don't mean to pry, you know, but aren't you dating Jean?"
"Yeah," Scott answered, nodding.
"Well, I don't know what you felt when you touched me, but, um," Seth's voice trailed off, and now he was as fidgety as Scott. Scott chuckled.
"Well, I know you're gay," he began, grinning. "And I know you're either not a virgin or you have a hell of an imagination."
Seth felt his face turn beet red, the kind of red that you saw on cartoons but hardly ever on real people.
"Oh, my God," Seth groaned, looking away. He couldn't look Scott in the face, not now, not knowing that Scott had seen everything inside his brain. No, not just seen, but felt. "Oh, God."
He'd said that so many times in the last five minutes that anyone walking by in the hallway was going to think they were having a revival meeting in here.
"I'm sorry," Scott said quickly. "I thought maybe I could lighten the mood."
Seth shook his head.
"I know, I'm just, I don't know," he said, shrugging. "I guess I'm just really embarrassed."
"Oh," Scott said, wondering if he'd made things worse again.
"Mostly I'm embarrassed at your lame jokes," Seth said quietly, and when Scott looked up in surprise he saw that Seth's mouth was stretched in a wide grin. "But seriously, aren't you, I don't know, uncomfortable? Or a little weirded out or something? I mean, you're dating Jean. Aren't you straight?"
Now it was Scott's turn to swallow uncomfortably, and to blush. He thought for a second that it was a good thing the lamp was so dim and faraway, because maybe Seth wouldn't notice.
"Yes, of course I am," Scott said quickly. "I mean, I'm dating Jean and all, but it, um."
"It's not your thing," Seth supplied. Scott kind of nodded, but still looked confused.
"I mean, it didn't feel bad or anything," he clarified. "It actually, well, it felt kind of good, but I don't know how I feel about that, you know?"
"I guess," Seth answered, shrugging. He kind of understood. "If it makes you feel better, once when I was on a trip for track, in the back of the bus, one of the girls on the team gave me a blowjob. It didn't feel bad or anything, but, you know, it wasn't really my thing. Is it like that?"
"Yeah," Scott said, brightening. Of course, that made complete sense. It meant that none of what happened really had to mean anything. It was just a pleasant kind of accident. "So, you know, that's how I know that you can use your power on people without hurting them."
"Cool," Seth said, looking away again.
"What's wrong?" Scott asked.
"It's going to sound stupid," Seth answered, sighing. "I mean, it's great that I can do that, and that Jean and the Professor were right, but I don't even know how I did it. It happened when I was asleep, and I have no idea how to do it when I'm awake."
Scott nodded.
"I think we can fix that," he said, facing Seth on the bed again, folding his legs under him. "Here, turn toward me."
"OK," Seth said, mirroring Scott's posture. They were sitting Indian style on the bed, facing each other. "Now what? Meditation or something? Some kind of secret mutant training trick?"
"Not exactly," Scott answered. "It's more a matter of focus. All of us, Jean, Bobby, Kitty, all of us have to train to learn how to use our powers, and training means you have to practice. Take your glove off."
"I don't think we should do this," Seth said immediately, shaking his head.
"That's why it doesn't work," Scott argued. "The Professor and I talked about this, and Jean said you and her did, too, a little. Every time you use your power, you're upset, so you're instinctively defending yourself. And now you're already convinced that if you touch me and you focus on activating it, you're going to hurt me, and you're right. If you go into this thinking you're going to knock me out or give me a seizure or something, then you will, because your power will respond to that."
"Because that always happens!" Seth blurted, frustrated. "I know it's going to happen because it always happens."
"But it doesn't, remember?" Scott said, pointing at his own chest. "I'm your proof that you did it once and it didn't hurt, and now all you have to do is do it again. You can do this, Seth, I know you can, because you already did. Now, take off your gloves."
Seth looked down at his hands, uncertain. Scott made sense, kind of. If he could do something asleep, he could do it awake. His body already knew how to do it, but Scott was saying that his mind didn't, and that's really what he needed to train. He pulled one of the leather gloves off, but stopped.
"What if I hurt you?" Seth asked uncertainly. "I mean, half the team already hates me for knocking out Kurt and Bobby."
"No, only Bobby has a problem with that," Scott said. "Everyone else thinks Bobby made a rookie mistake and needs to get over it. Now listen, you will not hurt me. I know you won't. Now take off your other glove, take a deep breath, and when you're ready take my hands. I believe in you. You can do this."
Seth took a few moments to breathe in and out, concentrating on what he was about to do. In his head, he kept picturing himself taking Scott's hands, and Scott being fine. Nothing was going to happen. Nobody was going to get hurt. Scott trusted him, was sure that he could do this, and more than anything he didn't want to let Scott down. Everyone else here, so far, had treated him like a curiosity or, in Jean's case, a responsibility, but Scott was the only one so far who had treated him like a friend. More than anything right now, Seth needed a friend, so he couldn't let Scott down. Closing his eyes, he reached out, his hands open, and folded them over Scott's. Scott grasped both of his hands firmly.
And nothing happened.
Nobody passed out, nobody got a shock or had a seizure. Seth wasn't getting any feedback, and Scott was still holding his hands tightly. Seth opened his eyes, and when he saw Scott sitting calmly, smiling encouragingly at him, a wave of relief flooded through him. Without thinking, it also spread down his arms and into Scott.
"Oh," Scott said, sitting up a little straighter. Seth jerked his hands back, afraid that he'd done something after all, but Scott just smiled at him.
"Are you ok?" Seth asked, alarmed. "Did I hurt you?"
"No," Scott answered, and then immediately clarified. "No, you didn't hurt me, and yes, I'm ok. Did you feel that?"
"I felt... something," Seth answered, trying to remember. "It happened so fast that I got a little feedback from you, but I was so scared I was hurting you that I let go before I could really concentrate on it. What did you feel?"
"Well, at first I didn't feel anything," Scott answered. "But then it was like this warmth, kind of. For just a second, I felt like everything was ok, and this kind of wave went through me, but then you pulled your hands away."
"That's kind of what I was feeling," Seth agreed. "When I touched you and nothing happened, I was so happy that I guess I kind of, whatever the word is, transmitted it to you."
"You know what this means?" Scott asked, smiling.
"You were right," Seth answered, smiling as well.
"You want to try it again?" Scott asked, and Seth nodded. "OK. Remember, just focus. It's going to feel good, and you're not going to hurt me."
"Right," Seth agreed, a nervous feeling running through his chest.
He could do this. He'd just done it a minute ago, and he could do it again.
He just needed to focus on feeling good, and that would flow through him into Scott. He took Scott's hands again, and felt another wave of relief when Scott didn't immediately pass out or bite his tongue in half or something. Scott drew in another deep breath, feeling Seth's relief flood through him, and he held Seth's hands tightly when Seth tried to pull them away again.
"Wait," Scott said softly. He concentrated on keeping his own breathing slow, not sure if his emotions would travel back through the physical link to Seth. "What do you feel? Are you getting any feedback?"
"A little," Seth answered, still feeling a little nervous about this. He was staring into Scott's glasses, but all he could see was the reflection of his own eyes. "It was kind of like an echo, like I get when something bad happens. I felt good, and then I felt it come back from you."
"Cool," Scott said, smiling. "I told you this could work. You need a little practice, probably, but you're doing great."
"Thanks!" Seth said, blushing, and then Scott was blushing a little, and then Seth felt that flush coming back to him, and then that feeling washed back to Scott again.
They both sighed together, and Scott felt himself shiver a little, a fast ripple that ran over his body. When it happened, it mirrored back to Seth, and then Seth sent it back to him again, the feeling a little stronger this time. In the back of his mind, Scott realized that they were falling into a loop, but it was happening too fast, and neither one of them seemed to be able to control it. As soon as Scott felt good, Seth felt it, and then Seth felt better, and that carried back through to Scott. As the circuit continued, it got a little stronger, so that before when he'd just felt a shiver, now it was like a hand running quickly over him, under his clothes, and Seth was feeling the same thing.
Involuntarily Scott gripped Seth's hands even tighter, almost painfully, his mind turning back to last night and the phantom touches in the infirmary. Now Scott felt hands sliding up and down his arms, running over the brown hairs and caressing his muscles, and Seth felt it, too. Seth felt the same hands running over his shoulders, lightly caressing them, and Scott felt them harder, smoothing over his own shoulders and running down his chest. He inhaled sharply, his pecs pressing up toward the hands that were now resting on his chest, and Seth gasped as he felt palms circling over his stiffening nipples. The hands started to move lower, running up and down his sides, and Scott felt hands running up and down his back, the fingertips tracing his spine, the hands drawing him closer and closer to Seth. Seth was breathing faster, hands running all over his chest and torso now, and he blinked, seeing Scott's face right in front of his.
"Wait!" Seth blurted, pulling his hands out of Scott's. Both of them gasped, the room and the two of them suddenly coming sharply into focus. "What was that?"
"I don't know," Scott answered. Had they been about to kiss? "I think we got kind of, I don't know, caught in something. It was like it was looping."
"But what about the other stuff?" Seth asked. "I mean, one second we were just feeling good, and then all of a sudden we were, um."
"Yeah," Scott said quickly, neither one of them wanting to say exactly what the "um" was out loud.
"Did I make you do that?" Seth asked, worried. He picked up the gloves and pulled them on, before anything else could happen. He'd probably have to wear them all the time, at least for now.
"I don't think so," Scott said quickly. "I mean, when it was happening, I wanted it to. I don't think either of us could help it."
Seth nodded, relieved again. He hadn't forced anyone to do anything, hadn't made Scott try to kiss him against his will, hadn't mentally forced himself on Scott. It raised another problem, though.
"We can't do this again," Seth said, looking down. "I mean, I appreciate you helping me, but you have a girlfriend, and I like Jean, and if this happens every time we try this then eventually we're going to do something we shouldn't."
"You're right," Scott said, standing up quickly and walking toward the door.
By the time Seth looked up again, Scott was already in the doorway, half turned. He stopped in the doorway. "You haven't met Peter yet, have you?"
"No," Seth answered, shrugging. They'd felt like such close friends for a little while, but now it all seemed really awkward, forced and stilted. Scott was acting like he couldn't wait to get out of the room, and Seth couldn't really blame him.
"You should," Scott said, opening the door. "He's, you know, your kind of guy, and he's single."
"Um, thanks," Seth said, puzzled. Did Scott just try to set him up with Colossus after the two of them had almost made out for what would have been the second time? "And thanks for, you know, helping me with this."
"No problem," Scott said. "Team captain and all. Have a good night."
"You, too," Seth answered, and then Scott was gone. He sighed, wondering if he'd alienated yet another team member. At this rate all he had left was Jean, unless she was miffed about what happened that afternoon, and Kitty, unless he managed to do something to piss her off, too.
In the hallway, Scott hurried to his room. He'd had to get out of there while Seth was still confused, before he really started looking at him. Otherwise, Seth might have noticed that Scott wasn't uncomfortable about what had happened, and was instead uncomfortable about the hardon snaking down the leg of his pants. Seth might not realize what had happened, but Scott did. The link between them hadn't turned sexual until Scott started thinking about what had happened the night before, and as soon as he had, it had happened again. If Seth hadn't broken the link, they would have gone even further.
"Damn," Scott sighed, trying to figure out what it all meant. He loved Jean, and he was straight, but doing that when Seth was awake was even more intense than what had happened last night. "I really need to go jerk off."
To be continued.