Not Him Again

Published on Nov 11, 2022

Gay

HOLA PEEPS!!

As always, I have to say THANKS!! You guys always give me loads of feedback on my stories and for that I'm so grateful xx

Hope you enjoy the fourth chapter...needless to say the Adult Friends section is my favourite #blush

As always, my email is still liciousryan@gmail.com if ya'll wanna get in touch. I do love an online flirt haha.

Peace and love! Ryan

NOT HIM AGAIN CHAPTER FOUR

Michael put on a fresh white tank top along with some black sports shorts and was just about to switch on the coffee maker when he heard the intercom go off. A huge ass smile immediately slashed across his face, however, so did the butterflies inside his stomach.

Neither himself or his former tormentor, as he liked to secretly call Gavin, had seen each other since that now infamous kiss back at the caravan park the other night, where Gavin and his thirteen-year-old son Kyle lived, and neither had bothered to so much as message the other, although, that was already a mere three days ago, and after all, Michael knew that Gavin was supposed to work on his pool today.

URGH...stuff all of that!

There really was no excuse...he just didn't have the guts.

He didn't know WHAT to actually so say to the man...he literally had launched himself at his childhood bully, who just so by the way, STILL had no clue to who Michael really was, and he had kissed him...God knows even whether or not Gavin was gay in the fucking first place...he sure as hell wasn't gay when they were in primary school...he literally had a thirteen year old piece of evidence to prove the contrary.

Shit...Michael ran the palm of his hand over his face, before he marched himself over to said intercom, and pressed the answer button firmly, yet gently in order for him to speak to the outside world...

"Morning, can I be of help?"

Geez...don't sound like a total and utter dork, Michael, for God's sake...

"Hey there, Mister Michael! Gavin and Kyle Connolly reporting for duty, as promised!" came Gavin's cheerful voice over the speakers, and Michael couldn't help but blush his ass off...

...admit it, you fucking idiot...he wouldn't call it love, by any means of the imagination...therefore all the things and all the abuse Gavin had put him through when they were kids were still way too raw inside the psyche of his brain, but there was no point in hiding the fact that he had come to feel strongly...very strongly about the man who was now driving his work van into his property, as we speak.

It would help if Gavin weren't as ruggedly handsome and sexy as he was...Jesus Christ.

When they were still at school together, before Michael had gotten suspended indirectly because of Gavin, he still hadn't realised back then, that he was in fact gay. Nothing...Nada. He still had photos hidden away inside all his old albums that he secretly stashed away for only himself to endure...literally. Gavin wasn't much of a looker back then, make no mistake, he was clearly popular...but for some reason, the girls loved him.

Especially Lisi. Poor Lisi.

Michael had long enough over these last few days to think about his former best friend from all those years ago...her getting pregnant with Gavin's baby when they were both were a mere fifteen years old...slipping in a puddle of water next to the pool on the boy's birthday...when she was already an almighty eight months far along...the baby made it...but Lisi perished.

As Michael put on what he hoped was a devilishly handsome smile of his own...he knew he looked good. His biceps were pumped and muscled thanks to all the work he had been doing inside his home gym for over a period of five years, his stomach muscles were ripped and bulging...his cheekbones were stunningly designed and rock hard...yeah, he knew he looked good.

But did he look good enough for Gavin...that was the kicker and a half.

"Morning, you guys!" Michael greeted both Gavin and Kyle, as the latter first made his way out of the van, speeding around the decrepit old vehicle to open the door for his dad. From inside the van, Gavin appeared to hand some equipment that they would be needing for the day of pool cleaning over to his son, before he himself got out of said vehicle...

...and Mikey had to think of all his former teachers naked as the day that they were born in order not to push forward a fucking eight-inch stiff boner in front of this thirteen-year-old boy as he laid eyes on him...

Holy fucking shit! Gavin was wearing a black tank top of his own...clearly not the Prada brand like his own design was, but GOD DAMN he looked so good. Prime rib cooked medium rare...with fries and onion rings to boot. He was wearing his ripped black jeans once more, and his hair was neatly styled in a classic spiky mess, just like Michael had come to know him.

Once more a flutter wave of electricity swept through poor Michael as he saw Gavin smiling up at him...their eyes connecting effective immediately...they have not seen each other once since that kiss three days ago...there was clearly an expectation on both men's part, but neither knew just what was entailed exactly.

"Morning! Sorry, we are a little early, but the quicker we finish, the better for you, right? It's gonna be a scorcher out here today!" Gavin said, the smile still pretty much evident on his handsome face, before both himself and Kyle made their way upwards towards him.

The corners of Michael's mouth broke out in a cheeky smile as he noticed right from the off, that Gavin's eyes weren't leaving his own for even a second.

"Hey Kyle! Helping out again today?" Michael asked, turning his attentions to what he now knew was the son of his late best friend.

For the utmost time, he had to shake himself silly, figuratively at least, for not realising this sooner...Kyle was literally the spitting image of Lisi. In every shape and form.

Kyle nodded shyly, before he clumsily handed over a package towards Michael. It was quite neatly gift wrapped, complete with a little bow of curled string at the top...something Michael immediately knew neither Gavin or Kyle would have been able to do...neither seemed particularly interested in arts and crafts...they must have asked some lady at the caravan park for help...Michael grinned warmly at Kyle as he feigned surprise.

"And this, now? Is this for me, young man?" he asked, taking the gift from Kyle and sneakily holding it up to his ear, pretending that he could hear whatever was inside, and it worked, as Kyle giggled and suddenly lost all of the shyness he still had, managing in breaking the ice marvellously in the process.

"It's a chocolate! Just to say thanks for helping me out the other day with Tyron and those bullies. I would have been dead if you didn't turn up," Kyle said seriously, his eyes full of energy and his hands both bawled into fists...as if he wanted Michael to see how tough he really was.

Michael was floored by this simple, very expensive gift...he knew that Gavin didn't have the best of finances, as he had lost his job during the pandemic and money had been tight since...he quickly opened it up, still with a huge ass smile on his face, and when it was completely unwrapped, he softly gasped...

...it wasn't any old slab of chocolate...it was a fucking Lindt slab of chocolate.

Michael knew what stuff like this normally cost...he sure as hell had gotten loads of candy for his clients over at Nintendo South Africa whenever it was their birthdays, anniversaries and so on...no offence, but how the hell could Gavin afford things like this?

"Kyle...buddy...this really is a sweet gesture, but it really wasn't necessary. I've been bulled before as well, a long time ago, and I know how crap it feels..."

JESUS!

Michael stopped talking as he nervously tried not to glance over towards Gavin, who was still standing RIGHT THERE, and had clearly heard all of what he had just said...

FUCK!

Keep calm...keep calm...no need to panic...no need to worry just yet...there was no way he knew that YOU are the boy he so relentlessly tortured in middle school...you look nothing like your younger self...just keep calm...

Michael smiled and ruffled Kyle's hair in thanks, the boy positively beaming as he looked up at him. Gavin cleared his throat, before he signalled towards the inside of the house.

"I should probably get to work, right? Lots to do today and guess what...I've gotten two more clients on my books! Man, things are finally looking up a bit!" Gavin replied, tightening his hold over his equipment even more and only then Michael realised just how heavy those things had to be...when Gavin had been holding it in his hands all this time.

"Of course! Sorry, I just...yeah, well, you guys know where everything is, you just do what you have to. I'll come and check in later."

Kyle ran into the house before Gavin could remind him that he was inside another person's property...and a huge ass house at that, before he turned towards Michael and grimaced.

"Sorry...I'll have a word with him, I promise."

Michael shrugged...he couldn't care less...and suddenly it was only the two of them...all alone...for the first time in three whole days.

Gavin's eyes were warm and soft as he kept staring into those belonging to Michael...who carefully turned around, making sure that Kyle wasn't within a distance in which he could see them.

"I really don't mind...he's a fantastic kid. You can be proud of him. You did a hell of a good job, there."

Gavin looked down at his shoes, and Michael had to choke back a laughter, when he realised that it was Gavin's turn to blush, and viciously at that, before he walked over towards him.

Standing ever so close...Michael still didn't know how far or how much to push his luck with Gavin...something told him that he should tread carefully...just in case the kiss the other night was a one time of thing, at least for Gavin.

But once he had reached his handsome employee, and former bully, he got his answer...he could see it, reflected in Gavin's eyes, fuck...there was no way he could miss it! Gavin gently placed the equipment in his hands down, carefully as to not to make a mess...before he looked at Michael one more time.

"Sorry...sorry, I didn't call or message after the other night. I didn't know what to actually say, I guess, and...while I'm at it, I should fucking apologise...I kinda acted like a cheap slut when I just...when I...well, you know..." Michael quietly murmured, deciding in taking the lead on this, and frowned when he saw that Gavin was actually smirking.

This was already as god damn hard as his morning glory for him to say, and all that Gavin could do was laugh?

But then, Gavin lifted both hands in the air, as if to declare peace, before he slowly reached out...Michael's eyes widening to the point where you could actually see the whites of his pupils as if through a microscope...as he felt Gavin take hold of his right hand and holding it...so tightly inside his own warm palm.

Michael shuddered, as did Gavin, he could feel it...as he ever so slowly, looked upwards from their joined hands to Gavin's face once more.

"Dude, did you even hear what I said..."

"I'm still waiting to hear what you think you did the other night that was SO fucking terrible..." Gavin snickered, gently swinging their hands through the course of the air, and ever so rhythmically at that.

Michael nearly flipped Gavin a solid middle finger with his free hand, but he smirked himself.

"Dude, I just fucking kissed you! Out of the blue! I don't even know if you're into guys...you have a son so clearly you had to be into women at some point...I just, I didn't want things to become awkward. I really like you guys coming here. I don't have loads of close friends...my work is really long ass hours; I really don't have the time..."

Gavin tugged on the hand of Michael's that he was holding, and winked at his boss, before he sighed.

"I guess I should clarify things. Yes...I'm most probably bisexual, if anything, because I still like women too...but geez Louise, look at you, you fucking sexy piece of meat...Michael listen...I like you, okay? I really do...never doubt that. And after all that you are doing for us...hey...are we okay here?

Michael swallowed.

TELL HIM...TELL HOM WHO YOU ARE...DO IT NOW!

Man, it must have taken really guts on Gavin's part to reveal that he was bisexual...the least you can do is to tell him you're little Mikey Lancaster! The boy who was so afraid by the mere thought of Gavin all those years ago, he used to literally piss the bed and refuse to go to school! He would stay behind after class and sweep the floors...just so that he could avoid Gavin and that brat Rowan from getting to him!

FOR FUCK SAKE...TELL HIM!

But that little voice in the back of his head refused his heart's logic...although his heart was telling him that it was straight up, the right thing to do, he didn't have a fucking clue how he would even say it...he didn't wanna chance things going belly up now that everything between them was seemingly going so bloody perfectly...

...because who knows what would happen if and when Gavin finally recognised him...how he would react, Jesus Christ!

He'd never forgive Michael for lying to him...there was just too much history between them stretching back fourteen years. There was no way that Gavin would just simply...be OKAY with him finding out the truth.

Michael sighed, before he simply smiled back at the hunk that was Gavin Connolly.

"I really don't wanna keep you...I know you have other jobs going...but I was wondering...do you and Kyle wanna come and have dinner here tonight? Relax...it's nothing fancy. Just a couple of dudes and a barbeque, hanging out. NO pressure. What do you say?

Michael mentally kicked himself for sounding so damn nervous and so fucking desperate...usually he fucked his guys and paid their taxi fair to go home straight after...he had always...ALWAYS refused to get anywhere near attached to anyone ever again in his entire life...but this was different.

This was Gavin.

It was just...it was just not the same.

Gavin nodded, and his eyes sparkled, like the huge ass pool at the back of the house that was patiently still waiting to be cleaned.

"That will be awesome...thanks. Can I bring anything...drinks, perhaps?"

Michael hovered for a moment...realising that their hands were still joined even after all this time, before he once more looked around, if there was remotely anything or anyone that could possibly be seeing them, before he leaned in and placed a soft kiss on Gavin's lips.

He sucked slightly at the dude's bottom lip as he finally released him, pleasantly surprised as he saw that Gavin had been JUST as into this as he was...his eyes evidently closed as he savoured what Michael just gave him.

"Where the fuck have you been all my life, man?" Gavin whispered slightly, as he opened his eyes, before he finally let go of Michael's hand, but not after a quick squeeze of it, before picking up his cleaning gear and disappearing straight into the house, and even more straight to the pool outside.

Pardon the pun.

Michael's smile dimmed as he rolled his eyes and mentally cursed himself.

"Where have I been all your life, Gavin...I wish to God I could answer that..." he whispered, a lone tear rolling down his cheek.

**

After going about their individual tasks and ways during the rest of the day, both parties had agreed that Gavin and Kyle turn up later that afternoon, around six a clock, and Michael's head was currently all over the place.

He had no idea if Gavin was even a meat lover, and had gotten a few vegetarian pieces of meat, just in case. Being a pre-teen boy he kinda knew that Kyle would utterly and completely devour whatever he would put in front of him, so that at least was sorted...but was Gavin who he needed to impress, after all.

Everything was set and ready when the intercom rang a little after six, before Michael literally broke his neck in order to get to it, my GOD, he was nervous as hell. His hands were suddenly sweaty as anything, and he quickly dashed towards the bathroom to wash them, knowing it would take a little while for Gavin to park his van...he dried his hands off and caught a glimpse of his himself inside his bathroom mirror as he did so.

He was about to have dinner...with his childhood bully. Go fucking figure. He still had no clue what he was doing.

"Mikey, Mikey, Mikey...what the fuck are you doing having dinner with the dude who destroyed your life..." he asked himself with a face as white as snow...for what he literally felt was the millionth time.

He heard the doorbell ring, and he quickly snapped out if it, checking himself over in the process.

After spending HOURS in front of the mirror in his bedroom in deciding what the fuck to actually wear tonight, he ended up going with a white buttoned shirt, as well as his expensive Armani black jeans. He quickly checked that his Billabong belt was attached comfortably, before he looked at his reflection one more time.

"He's not the same person he was...you gotta believe that...you have to, Mikey..." he whispered, before a second ring at the front door made him realise just who was outside.

He knew he looked good. He knew that he smelled good.

But would Gavin think so?

"Hey you guys! Come on in, the pool is heated, the BBQ is just about lit and the meat is just waiting to be cooked. Make yourselves at home!"

The smile on Kyle's face as he realised just what Michael was actually saying...

"Mister Michael...you mean...I can go for a swim in that huge pool of yours? Really, really?"

"KYLE!" Gavin reprimanded his son, but Michael giggled and placed his hand solidly on Kyle's shoulder...once more...it was like Lisi was looking straight at him, through the eyes of her son, the very same one that, sadly, she never got to hold even once in her life.

"You bet you can! Go and change, the bathroom is inside the corridor, second on the left!" he replied, and both men shook their heads as Kyle didn't bother wasting even more time. He sped off to go and get his swimming trunks on, as if the devil himself was chasing him.

"Believe me, I tried to stop him from bringing his swimming gear...he said if I wasn't going to ask you if he could take a dip, then he would..." Gavin said, looking at Michael with sheer apology in his eyes, but Michael turned around and grabbed hold of Gavin's hand.

"Quick, come here..." he whispered, and dragged his former tormentor towards his bedroom, where they were as far as they could have been from the bathroom, in case Kyle finished changing quickly...which was a real possibility.

When they were finally inside, Gavin's eyes were still as wide as his ass crack when he saw how huge the space actually was, before he was solemnly and quickly pushed against the wall of said bedroom.

"I've wanted to do this all..fucking...day..." Michael whispered urgently, before he pulled Gavin closer and planted his lips on the man before him.

Gavin wasn't made of rock either, by any means, and he moaned softly, grabbing the back of Michael head, holding it close to his own as the two men made out as best they could.

Michael's hands creeped upwards to gently hold Gavin's cheek with both of them, before he broke the kiss, looking deeply into the eyes of his former bully.

"You're an amazing kisser...Jesus Christ...I want some more of that..."

"Come and get it then," Gavin giggled before two sets of lips met once more, reach trying their best to actually suck each other's tongue right out of their gobs...both men instantly moaned as their steel hard dicks touched through their separate pieces of clothing...and Michael in particular...his jeans were so tight, you could fucking see his cockhead's outline.

"Dad? Mister Michael?"

"Oh my god...It's Kyle...we gotta go..." Gavin whispered, nudging Michael's nose playfully with his own, before he saw the lust in the opposing man's eyes.

"Yeah...I guess...you're just so...so fucking hot...dude...what are you doing to me?" Michael murmured before he placed another quick, desperate kiss on Gavin's lips, before both men finally broke apart...and one look towards Michael's groin, had Gavin snickering like never before.

"Uhm...big problem you have there...geez how huge is that thing?" he asked, taking a quick look outside to see where the hell Kyle was. More importantly, he was actually licking his lips for what he saw. Always a good sign.

"Eight fucking inches..." Michael said, as proudly as he ever could.

Gavin looked literally as if was drooling and salivating at the same time.

"I wanna see that...soon..." he said, smiling his multi-million dollar smile to Michael one more time, before he took a deep breath, and straightened out his own clothes and ran his fingers through his ruffled hair.

"Kyle? Where are you, my boy?" he yelled loud enough to the kid to hear, before he winked at Michael, and finally leaving the room.

Michael literally threw himself onto his waterbed...his cock at red alert...hard and PULSING inside his skinny jeans. He took hold of the steel stiff phallus and gave it a little tug and a soft squeeze.

He could still taste Gavin on his lips.

Again...what the fuck was he doing?

**

Michael sat back in his chair and stared out into the night's sky.

He couldn't remember when last he had such a good time as he did tonight...with Kyle being at the complete centre of attention as the kid did one cannon bomb into the massive swimming pool, after the other, with Gavin numerous times looking nervous as hell that his son might accidently break something...God knows what...hollering at Kyle numerous times to be careful.

To his surprise, Michael found out that Gavin also liked his meat cooked medium rare, just like he did, as the two men continued to grow closer, by the second. Gavin was busy taking a smoke break outside at the pool, with Kyle having fallen asleep about half an hour ago, and therefore, to get away from said smoke inhalation, Michael was standing in front of his house, on the porch...surveying the stars as he saw them...one by one.

His heart was throbbing...this...all of this...in the past he was way too scared to allow anyone into his life...once they realised that his dad was a well-known figure in this town and being in politics...they tended to throw themselves at his son...and anyone who he brought back to his house to fuck could see that Michael had money to his name.

That's why over the years, to protect himself from getting hurt...like when he was thrown out of his house at age eighteen when he came out to his parents...his mother Ashley, tried her best to reason with his father, but to no avail. Frank Lancaster could barely handle that his son had been allowing himself to get bullied and suspended out of his public school...

...but the one thing he couldn't, wouldn't accept was that Michael was attracted to men.

He really should honour the promise he made his mom...he hadn't seen his father since he had that stroke a couple of weeks ago. He felt bad enough but then again...just because his father was not himself right now, didn't excuse all that he did over the years, how he had treated both himself and his mom...or everything that was said when he had came out.

Michael shuddered as he felt a pair of hands envelop him from the back, before he smelled the cigarette odour of which Gavin had been smoking. He smiled peacefully as he felt Gavin rest his head inside the crook of his neck, still all the while, holding him, very, very tightly.

"I could get used to this..." Michael broke the silence, and leaned back slowly, to be closer to Gavin's body, which the latter man responded by kissing his neck.

"I could never get used to...all of this. All this luxury. No seriously...my dad has a huge house, but it's nothing like yours. Then again...I ain't welcome there anymore."

That was something which Michael had been wondering about ever since the beginning...Gavin's father had been the principal of the middle school they were attending when they were kids...which is why the little shit had gotten away with absolutely everything he did back then...turning a complete and utter blind eye to all the bullying Gavin did as a boy.

Why were Gavin and his son living in a caravan park, when his family so clearly HAD to have money?

It was as if Gavin could literally read his mind, because he released Michael, but grabbing both of his hands, and before Michael could respond, it was Gavin who this time, took the initiative and laid a soft kiss on him.

"I wish I could turn back time...I really do," Gavin whispered, before he sniffed and sat down on the bench in front of the porch, gently pulling Michael along with him, as they sat in sheer silence.

Michael swallowed slowly, before he leaned into his buddy even more, laying his head completely on Gavin's chest, and he felt the voltage of electricity sweep through him as Gavin's arm immediately covered his shoulders and upper body, holding him close.

Together they sat in comfortable silence for a few moments, before Michael heard Gavin sigh...followed by a raw sound coming from the back of his throat.

"I probably should have told you this before...Kyle's mother...her name was Lisi, short for Alexandra."

I already know that...Michael's heart screamed, but he stayed silent and allowed Gavin to continue.

"It was my fifteenth birthday party...and honest to God, I still have fucking nightmares about the whole thing...we were partying and carrying on...you know, like horny teenagers do when there's beer and stuff...I...sigh I sneaked it in without my parents knowing that night. Long story short...Lisi was eight months pregnant at the time. I was so fucking drunk, I honestly don't know how it happened but the next thing I heard was a massive scream...and Lisi laying on the concrete next to the pool...she was still alive, but she wasn't moving...Jesus Michael, there was so much blood..."

A tear escaped Michael's eye...somehow, he could see it in his mind's eye, even though he wasn't even there. All that Lisi ever wanted to be, was being popular...to be seen. She was never mean to him when she and Gain got together...they were best friends, along with Gemma back then...and he remembered the sickening feeling he endured when Lisi had told both of them she was dating Gavin. Gavin Connolly...the most popular boy in school.

No matter WHAT he did...or who he did it with...and she sure as hell knew how he was bullying Michael...she refused to stand against him once they were official. She loved Gavin...in her own naive little way...that was clear to see. She was Michael's best friend...and he knew she would NEVER have had sex with Gavin, if she didn't. She simply wasn't that kind of person.

Gavin took a deep breath, before he wiped his own eyes and carried on...

"Doctors...they uhm...they couldn't save them both. Lisi had been hurt too much. She...she fucking died, Michael..."

Michael sat upright as he realised that Gavin was now crying, and this wasn't just a sniff...this was actually severe. He reached over and hugged Gavin to him, holding the man that he had come to care about so much, while he got rid of some of his demons. Somehow, Michael knew that this...this would always stand between Gavin and whoever he wanted to date or even more perhaps...that was a sheer level of guilt that would NEVER go away.

"I'm sorry...geez...you invited me over and look at me...crying like a fucking baby..."

"Hey...It's okay. It's gonna be okay. Hey...I got you. Okay? I got you...I ain't letting you go..." Michael said, before he swallowed...and reached slowly over towards Gavin, totally invading his personal space...and gently wiped his former bully's tears away with the back of his hand.

Gavin sniffed, still, but he seemed calmer, more shocked at this incredibly intimate gesture...before he launched forward and kissed Michael like a man possessed. Together both of them continued to play tonsil tennis with each other, until Gavin finally broke it off, in search for some much-needed air.

"You're a good man, Michael. You're good to me and Kyle. And...I dunno where your head is at, but if you ever wanted to take this...whatever this is...further...then you gotta know everything about me. Because from what you hear, you probably ain't gonna like me very much."

Michael had never been so conflicted...EVER in his life. TELL HIM WHO YOU ARE! He's totally changed! He ain't that terrifying bully anymore! He's being real with you...BE REAL WITH HIM!

DO IT!

On the other hand though, what if all of that...all their history...what if it simply just, remained what it was...history?

Michael's mind was working overtime...he didn't wanna lose Gavin...ever. He didn't know what he felt for him but after this...after tonight...both of them out here after a long day's work, spending time together, with Kyle being asleep inside...

...was it so wrong?

Was it too wild, or too insane to wonder and feel as if THIS was his one real chance to actually have a family? A wonderful man and a kid, to boot? Was it that strange, or that weird...after EVERYTHING that had happened between them all those years ago?

This...it fucking felt RIGHT! How can something feel this right...when it was actually so wrong?

TELL HIM...HE'LL UNDERSTAND...

NO...DON'T TELL HIM...HE'LL LEAVE YOU AND YOU'LL NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN...

What to fucking do...

"Stay with me."

Gavin's neck lunged itself towards Michael, the rapidly appearing frown now completely etched across his forehead in sheer confusion over what he had just heard.

"How do you mean...stay with you?"

Michael stood up...and he walked away a few feet from Gavin...before he turned around, the latter still seated on the bench.

"You're right. I don't know what this is...or what it will end up being...all I know is that I have NEVER...EVER had a connection with anyone like I do with you. God...you came into my life that one morning...and before you even talked, I knew you were the most beautiful person I had ever seen."

Michael swung his arms in utter confusion of his own, before he went on.

"I...I fucking end up cancelling meetings at work these days...so that I can be here on the days when you do my pool. The one time that I couldn't make it, I nearly got a written warning for being irritable to my staff! I mean...dude...I think about you, like all the time, when we are five minutes apart, I miss you so much, it actually hurts."

Michael's chest was by now heaving with the utmost emotion that he was now displaying towards the man, who fourteen years ago had kicked him so hard in his stomach, he was coughing severely and had been in sheer pain for hours...

...all that was now thrown the hell out of the window. All he cared about, was the Gavin of the present. Fuck whatever happened in their past. He didn't care...HE DIDN'T CARE!

"I don't wanna freak you out...but I kinda get the feeling you're into me too. Just for the night...just for one night...please...stay with me."

Gavin was silent for a few seconds, before he too stood up. He walked over towards Michael and took him in his arms, giving his forehead a tender kiss, before he cupped Michael's cheek with his right hand, and caressed it softly.

"I don't want you to think I'm like all those other guys...just after your house and your money, because I'm not...the fact that I live in a caravan park..."

"Gavin, I don't fucking care about that, I care about you!"

Gavin smiled, and leaned in for another kiss, before he sighed.

"I'll stay, for tonight. But before I'm back on my feet, financially, I can't give YOU what you deserve. I do okay...but it's not nearly what you're used to. I'm just being honest here."

Michael shivered, before he hugged Gavin tightly, one more time.

Together the two guys stood on that porch...with only the light dimming from the moon above them providing any sort of light, whatsoever, each with their own thoughts and feelings.

Michael sighed happily as he felt Gavin kiss his hair and he snuggled even closer.

There was no point in hiding it anymore.

It was as clear as day. He finally had a name for what he felt...the reason that his heartbeat rivalled that of a fucking garden mouse every single damn time he was even remotely close to Gavin.

Why he missed him so much.

Why he always looked for excuses to spend time with him.

Why he had literally BEGGED him to stay the night.

A tear rolled down his cheek...

If this wasn't love...

...he didn't know what the fuck was.

**

"You wanna take a shower? I have some clothes that I think will fit you," Michael whispered as he walked next to Gavin, who was busy carrying young Kyle, who was still sleeping soundly, towards the spare room, and this time, Gavin made sure to softly whistle as he saw how huge the room was.

"Dude...are you on a million a month or what?" he giggled, obviously in awe, to which Michael replied in giving him a slight shove.

"Shut up, will ya?" he giggled back, before he stood aside, as they reached the bed, with Gavin's eyes suddenly on his own...as if asking for permission...Jesus Christ...he nodded eventually...and watched in sheer awe as he saw once again how tenderly and lovingly Gavin treated his son...this time having a much better understand of why that was.

Gavin kissed the top of Kyle's forehead, before he stood back and held out his hand towards Michael.

"It's still so early...let's have a swim...if you're up for it? It's your house, after all."

Michael smiled...his cheeks actually hurting from the strain, before emphatically taking Gavin's hand.

"Lead the way...," he whispered.

**

"Dude...turn down the fucking hotness!"

Gavin showed his boss a middle finger as he emerged from the house, in the swimming trunks that Michael had borrowed him. It was a near perfect fit, and the handsome stud was shirtless...his six pack abs on the show for the whole world to see...but at that moment, that's what Michael was...his whole world.

He came ever so closer to Michael, a glint in his eye, before he giggled and ran the palm of his right hand all over his stomach...

"So, you think I'm hot, huh?" he smirked, with all the classic thirteen year old cockiness that Michael remembered.

In turn Michael, came up to Gavin and grabbed hold of said hand, before he placed it solemnly and carefully onto his own torso.

"Far out man..." he heard Gavin hiss with pure sexual delight, as he shivered once more, feeling Gavin's warm hands glide and shimmy all over his abdominals.

"You wanna cool off?" Michael whispered...his dick as hard as stone.

"I better before I fucking cum standing right here..." Gavin responded.

Michael leaned in, giving Gavin a smouldering kiss, before he pushed him away playfully, and running towards the massive pool, and making a near perfect dive into the warm heated water, that would make even Tom Daley jealous as hell.

With his hair mattered all over his forehead, he quickly wiped it backwards with his hand, before another earth-shattering splash very much near him could be heard.

Michael's eight incher was beginning to drill a hole inside his own trunks, so it seemed...if he thought Gavin looked good before...he looked a thousand times better when he was wet from head to toe. The watery droplets literally cascading down that ripped muscled torso...his powerful chest matching Michael's second by second, with the rapid beating of each man's heart.

Suddenly things were quiet...suddenly things weren't funny anymore...suddenly they were deadly serious.

Michael waddled over towards Gavin with a look in his eye, very much resembling a lion cub eating his first piece of raw meat...he grabbed Gavin, and pushed him against the side of the pool, having both sink into the warm water at the deep end, so that only their shoulders and faces were visible.

He reached out with both his arms and placed them securely behind Gavin's neck, and he could hear the latter hiss with appreciation. There was no laughter now...the time for giggling and snickering were gone.

"Gavin, I..." Michael stumbled...knowing what he WANTED to say, but scared as fuck to actually say it.

Once more, Gavin nudged his nose playfully, like only he could do, against that of Michael.

"Don't talk...don't say anything...not now..." he whispered...his eyes reflecting the quivering water that was surrounding both of them.

Michael nodded...before he kissed Gavin one more time.

Their arms and hands...even their god damn legs were all over the place, as the hunger, the passion and the love the two men had for each other was evident for all the world to see. Gavin leaned down to kiss Michael's neck, eliciting a massive groan from the latter, who returned the favour by tilting Gavin's neck backwards, careful as to not hurt him...

...he NEVER wanted to hurt him...and proceeding to launch a tongue and lip lashing at the man's Adam's apple...

They were totally alone...and totally into what they were doing, that they never heard the voice calling them from the patio door...

"ANYONE HOME?"

Both Michael and Gavin split apart faster than you could say "busted" as Michael swallowed a bunch of water in trying to get way from Gavin, and fired himself in a serious range of coughs, in trying to get rid of the sudden excess fluid. At once, Gavin was at his side, slamming his back with the palms of his hands, doing what he could to help his friend.

"Ohhhh, there you are! I've been calling and calling...ahhh...now it makes sense why I had to use my remote to get in here, you have...company..."

Michael panicked instantly...Jesus Christ, it was his mother!

What the fuck was she doing here!?

He wanted to talk...he wanted to speak...he wanted to order her to get the hell out of there before she said or do something that would totally blow his cover away with Gavin...if she called his by his nickname... Mikey...it will be game over for sure!

"Evening, Mam. Sorry, for all of this...neither of us heard the intercom going off," Gavin shyly said, as he kept softly pummelling Michael's back, who in turn, was still coughing out the pool water that was now lodged inside his lungs.

"Mom...what...why..." he managed to croak out before Ashley Lancaster turned her head to face away from him.

"I'm sorry, son! Oh...really now, if I knew this...whatever this is...was the reason you didn't answer your phone, I would have left it alone until tomorrow. I thought something was wrong, so I came over, since it's only what, past nine now. So...what I wanted to say is, Dad is coming home tomorrow from the hospital! He's finally recovered suffiently enough from the stroke, that the staff and the surgeon is happy to discharge him! Isn't that wonderful news?"

Gavin rested his hand on Michael's shoulder and even in his current dishevelled state, Michael could see that he was frowning slightly.

"Your dad had a stroke? You never told me..." he said softly, but loud enough that Ashley could hear him.

She rolled her eyes before she lifted her glasses and took a good look at Gavin, for the first time that evening.

"Excuse me...and you are?"

Please God...don't answer her...please don't answer her...please let a bolt of lightning come down and strike Gavin and leave him fucking unconscious...but please don't answer that question...!

Too late.

Gavin cleared his throat and swam to the shallow end of the pool. Michael, still coughing up some excess mucus from the swallowing of the water, was powerless to stop him.

"Where's my manners...I'm Gavin, Mam. Gavin Connolly. I'm a good friend of your son," Gavin said, giving Ashley Lancaster what he hoped was a warm smile to possibly impress the mother of the man that he felt so strongly about, his right hand outstretched towards her.

Michael swallowed...he cleared his throat...his eyes were bloodshot red...Jesus...what has he done?

Ashley, on the other hand, had her hand out on the way towards Gavin's as well with a cunning twinkle in her eye...after all she knew all about Michael's sexual escapades ever since he had started to live on his own...

...and at the mere sound of his name, she snatched said arm away as quickly as she could.

For a few seconds, everything was severely quiet and awkward as hell, with Gavin frowning, his hand still outstretched, turning back towards Michael with his eyes upright, as if to say...what the fuck is going on...why are you suddenly quiet? Why's your mom acting this way?

Michael coughed one last time and stood still...his legs frozen with fear.

"Mom...please...it's not what you think..."

Ashley treaded backwards and looked at Gavin with a fire in her eyes that seemed it would BLAZE over into Krakatoa at any given moment, before she pointed her index finger straight at him...

"Gavin Connolly...your father is the principal of Harmony Primary school, is he not?"

Gavin finally allowed his arm to sink back into the water, and he once more looked back at Michael, now more confused than ever, before he turned back towards Ashley.

"Yes, he is, but I don't know how that is relevant now..."

Ashley threw down her handbag with a sheer force that frightened even Michael, and the sparks FLEW from her eyes.

"YOU! How DARE you! What the hell are you doing in MY son's house! You have a god damn nerve! Thanks to you, my son had to leave that pathetic excuse of a school years ago, because YOU BULLIED HIM! You just wouldn't stop, would you? Such a tough guy, always hiding behind his Daddy!"

"Mom, stop now, that's enough!" Michael pleaded...his legs still refusing to even as much as move.

Gavin swung around...

"Michael, what is this woman talking about?" he asked...his voice as cold as ice.

Michael opened his mouth to TRY and fathom an answer...literally any answer that he could think of to somehow keep Gavin in his life...

...but Ashley was on a mission, and nothing was going to stop her.

"This woman? I'm Mikey's mother! That's Mrs Lancaster to you, you piece of trash!"

Michael looked way from Gavin...there was no way he could bare to look at the man...the man that he loved...for one second longer.

Gavin's eyes widened, as it flickered over Michael's body...his entire frame...his face...his arms...his clear refusal to even look at him...

...and suddenly it all became clear.

It was like a black curtain of memories...of realisation...of discovery and sin...had been withdrawn from his eyes...at fucking last.

"Jesus...Michael...Michael Lancaster...you're MIKEY LANCASTER!" Gavin said...the breaking of his voice evident for everyone to hear.

Michael wiped the dripping of tears from his eyes that seemed to flow downwards with ease, before he dared to even look at Gavin once more...

"You gotta believe me...this isn't what you think...I swear! I wanted to tell you, so many times! SO MANY TIMES! But I was afraid...I was so afraid that if I did...if you knew who I really was...that you would walk! Gavin...Gavin, listen to me..."

Michael forced his powerful legs to glide through the water throughout all his emotional scarring and his tears, until he was right in front of Gavin, and he took both of his hands inside his own.

"Mikey, what on earth..."

"MOM, PLEASE! JUST GO! YOU'VE FUCKING DONE ENOUGH!"

Ashley Lancaster stammered; God knows Michael had NEVER spoken to her like that before. Not even to his father, when he kicked him out of the house for being gay, did those type of words ever leave his mouth...blinking her eyes, in sheer shock and horror, she shook her head, before she grabbed her handbag in disgust, but not before she got in one last blow...

"Mikey...I can't...wait a minute! Did you know that your best friend Lisi is dead, because of him? You really wanna associate with that kind of person?" she hissed, before she finally walked back and disappeared into the kitchen patio where she had come from.

Gavin stepped back from Michael, and released his hands from his own, as if they were complete and utter poison.

"You knew...this whole damn time...you knew who I was?"

Michael nodded, his eyes pleading the latter man...

"Yeah. Yeah, I did."

Gavin still didn't make a move...he just...he just STOOD here...utterly destroyed, it seemed. His face was getting more and more red by the passing moments, whether it was from anger or from embarrasment, Michael couldn't tell.

Gavin shook his head and held his hands over his face...

"You...you bastard! You fucking bastard! You stood there while I told you about Lisi dying and all the time you KNEW!"

"Wait, Gavin, I didn't know from the beginning, I only found out when Miss Parker told me the whole story..."

Gavin's arms finally came down onto the water, and HARD at that, water sprouting everywhere you looked, my God, he was that angry. He glared at Michael...before slowly coming closer.

"You went behind my back? Fishing for info? Dude...just tell me one thing...what was this? All of this? Huh, MIKEY? Revenge? Making me fall for you? Just when were you planning to actually tell me this? When you fucked me in the ass and you came inside me? ANSWER ME!"

Michael wiped away more tears, before he shivered...the water still heated but somehow, he was still cold as anything. He closed his eyes and shook his head.

"No...it was never gonna be like that! Well...at the beginning, maybe, but then I realised you changed, that you were totally different..."

"SHUT UP! JUST...SHUT UP!"

Gavin was now at his side...and this time, not for a cuddle, by any means.

The look in his eyes terrified Michael to his very soul...for a moment he lost control of his body as everything seemed to flash back in time...and it took him back to THAT fateful afternoon fourteen massive years ago...the last time that Gavin had attacked him after school.

How Gavin's lacky Rowan Minords had held his hands behind his back, while Gavin went to town on him...a mere scared little boy, wanting desperately to get home.

He saw Gavin the day that he was suspended from Harmony Primary...how Gavin had taunted him by saying all kinds of ugly, disgusting things about his mother...how he was blackmailing him to do his homework, otherwise...

...and finally, images once more flashed through his brain of how he finally, finally, had enough...how he charged after Gavin when the boy's back was turned...and how he had KICKED him right in the middle of his spine...the thirteen year old Gavin falling to the ground like a sack of potatoes...screaming in pain...his father coming out of his office and demanding to know who had hurt his son...

...and all the fingers...even that of Lisi...his best friend...was pointed at little Mikey Lancaster.

Instinct kicked in...Michael was suddenly in total combat mode as he saw the fire and anger inside Gavin's eyes.

Knowing Gavin knew the truth and that he was angry as hell...it was a complete and total mind fuck...defence was his only option, it seemed.

The words were out before he could even try and stop himself.

"Now you listen to me...you fucking touch me tonight...you fucking lay as much as a finger on me, and I'll fucking end you. I'm not scared of you anymore. I'm not a little kid you can bully, kick and punch around, NOT ANYMORE! You touch me right now and I'm telling you, there's only one way this fight ends...and it ain't gonna be with me losing, that I can promise you!" he hissed towards his childhood bully.

Gavin's eyes softened, before he paced back a few steps in the water...and he shook his head, utterly dumbfounded.

"I wasn't gonna hit you...I'm angry, yes...who wouldn't be...but I'm NOT that guy anymore! I can't believe...I can't believe you thought I was gonna..."

Michael lowered his guard, and saw that Gavin quickly launched himself towards the edge of the pool, before getting out, and grabbing one of the towels that Michael had gotten for them earlier...way before any of this started.

"Gavin, come on, where are you going? We gotta talk this over! Gavin, just...just look at me!" he pleaded for what it was still worth.

Gavin proceeded to dry off the worst water from his body, before he neatly folded the towel and replaced it where he had found it.

"Where am I going? I'll fucking tell you. I'm gonna get my son from that fancy ass bedroom, and I'm gonna go home to my fucking caravan. Because I'd rather be THERE right now, than ANYWHERE near you!"

Michael's heart finally sank.

"Gavin...dude...you don't understand, I love you...please..."

Gavin stopped...right in his tracks. He turned around, and shook his head, defiantly.

"Don't make me fucking laugh! You don't love me. How can you? When I did all those things to you?"

He paused, before running his fingers through his wet hair, in sheer frustration.

"You could have told me. You should have told me. Because then, I wouldn't have...you...you totally got into my head...and inside my heart...by lying! I'm scum...I know that...but what you did...it's far worse!"

Gavin took a deep intake of breath, before he took one last look at Michael.

"For what it's worth...I never got to say how sorry I am. What I did back then. I'm really, truly sorry. But I think it's best if we just...never see each other again. This...there's no way this can ever work, not now. You know it, and I know it. Goodbye, Mikey..."

"FUCK!" Michael hissed as Gavin finally disappeared into his kitchen area...he didn't have the guts to run after him...and he didn't want Kyle seeing them fighting. That was the last thing he wanted.

When he heard Gavin's old van turn on, a few minutes later, that's when he lost it.

He totally lost it.

He finally got out of the pool, a sea of tears streaming down his face, before he ran into his house, wet droplets spilling everywhere you looked on the expensive tiles and carpets, before he slammed the intercom bottom to open the front gate so hard, he immediately knew it was fucked.

Michael sunk to his knees...placed both hands over his eyes and cried like he was that little thirteen-year-old boy once more...after being hurt by his childhood bully.

Gavin loved him. That was clear...he actually loved him back...but now that the truth was out...how were they supposed to go any further?

Was there any way...any way back for them?

At all?

THANKS FOR READING!

Told you it was an emotional one...it broke me to write it...but the truth had to come out some time hahaha.

If you read my stories in the past...you'll know that it ALWAYS...ALWAYS has a good ending. So please...stick with me lol.

I love hearing from all of you, so please feel free to shoot me up a few words, and I'll always try my best to respond xx

liciousryan@gmail.com

Next: Chapter 5


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