Not Meant to Be

By K

Published on Feb 14, 2000

Gay

Author's Note:

Hey to all... Sorry it has taken me so long to post this chapter...I've had distractions...I think you know who you are...anyways Enjoy. I have no clue on the time line for events of past few months involving NSYNC. So just go with the flow. If you have any comments or suggestions, I would love to hear them, so write damn it.

Send them to me at K_Magic@Prodigy.Net

Disclaimer... This is a fictional story between a fictional character and Members of NSYNC. This in no way implies anything about the sexuality or any thing else of the members of NSYNC. This is all fiction.

--------------- Chapter Six ---------------

Stupid ass bug keeps landing on my face. I brush it off, but it keep landing back on my face. Then it starts laughing at me. Weird dream, but as I come out of sleep, the laughing is still there. I open my eyes, it's a little to bright but I can make out Lance's face.

"You're an ass." I said throwing a pillow over my face, mumbling thru the pillow.

"I'm sorry...you're just so cute..I couldn't help myself...I just can't keep my hands off you."

"What time is it?"

"Ummm...6 o'clock"

"You best mean PM if you want to live."

I felt Lance moving around on the bed and then climbing on top of me, straddling waist and sitting down. He pulled the pillow away from my face and leaned down and started to kiss me.

"Come on Jay...wake up...please..."

I placed my hands on his chest and pushed up sending him flying to the other side of the bed, onto his back. I got up quickly and jumped on top of him, pinning his arms above his head. I brought my lips down on his and gave him a quick kiss. I jumped up off of the bed and ran into the bathroom, closing and locking the door behind me. Lance was right behind me, but the door closed in his face. I heard the doorknob shaking.

"Come on Jay...let me in....please...."

"No way...you can take your wide awake ass downstairs and make me breakfast, oh and while your down there you can do the dishes from last night."

"Come on Jason...open up...I'm sorry...please....let me in"

I turned the shower on."

"What..I can't hear you...I sure am hungry though, I wish I had a nice pop star to cook me breakfast and have it waiting for me when I'm done with my shower."

It got quiet and I got undressed and jumped in the shower. I let the water run over my body and by the time I was done with my shower, I was wide awake. I got dressed and walked downstairs to the smell of bacon. Lance was standing in front of the stove frying some eggs. I walked quietly up behind him and wrapped my arms around his waist and started kissing his neck.

"Go take your shower, I'll finish up."

He turn around, smiled at me and handed me the spatula. He kissed me lightly on the lips and ran upstairs.

I finished the eggs and set the table. I quickly washed all dishes and by the time I was finished, Lance was sitting at the table waiting for me. I sat down next to him and we started to eat.

"So..what's up for your day."

"Well, I have to be at the studio in an hour. I'll be there until 6pm. How about you."

"I have a shoot at 5 pm, I'll be done after 8pm. Then I'm yours."

"Ok call me on my cell when your done....Hey, when should we get Josh and Scott together?"

"How about we double tomorrow night."

"Cool, I'll tell Josh today, where should we go?"

"Well, Scott is a big goof and so is Josh...so..."

"Bowling."

"Bowling."

We finished eating and cleaned up. We hugged and kissed and then went our separate ways. I headed to my apartment. I checked my e-mail and messages, grabbed the newspaper and plopped down on the couch. Before I finished the first page, the newspaper was over my face and I was out. I was awakened by the noise of the newspaper being removed from my head.

"Hey Sleepy...ya done with the Sports page."

"Yeah." I said as I yawned and stretched.

"Oh Scott, what ya doing tomorrow night?"

"Not much...I'm working the early shift and I was just going to veg here and be a potato...Why?"

"How would you like to go out with Me, Lance and a friend?"

"This isn't a blind date is it."

"It depends on your definition."

"No, it depends if he is a dog."

"That my friend...you will just have to wait and judge for yourself...You willing?"

"Why not, couldn't be any worse than I've been dating recently."

"Cool, so tomorrow about 6pm...dress casual...shit what time is it?"

"About 3:30pm."

"I gotta start getting ready for my shoot. I'll catch you later." I said walking quickly back to my room. I grabbed a shower, dressed and headed out.

That night, Lance and I spent a quiet night at his house. We both had early starts for the next day, so we called it an evening early. I decided to go home and rest up to look fresh for my shoot in the morning.

The next day went by pretty fast. Lance stopped by my shoot and caused quite a commotion. He managed to keep himself unknown for about 10 minutes while waiting for me to break for lunch. He was spotted by a young lady who was assisting the photographer. With one loud "Oh my god", she brought the shoot to a halt. I was laughing as he was soon surrounded by pretty much everyone, including the photographer, who was trying to slip Lance his card. We had lunch at a small diner down the street and his disguise worked there. I had to restrain myself to keep my hands away from him. After lunch, we managed to slip into an alley way and grab a quick kiss before he took off back to the studio.

My shoot ended about 4 and I headed home. I jumped in the shower and after I was done, there was a knock at the bathroom door.

"Hey Jay...phone."

I wrapped a towel around my waist and opened the door. Scott handed me the phone.

"Hello"

"Hey Lover"

"Hi Babe, what's up."

"I just got home from the studio, Josh is going to meet me here in about an hour. Do you want us to pick you guys up or meet you somewhere."

"Why don't you meet us at the resturant, that way later we'll have two cars if we want to divide the group."

"Sounds good, so I'll see you in a bit."

"Ok...I love you."

"I love you too."

"Bye"

I got ready and checked on Scott. He was all ready and waiting on the couch watching TV.

"So, are you planning on telling me where we are going tonight and if I still will be talking to you after I see this guy."

"Awww come on...give me some credit....trust me...you will be asking me to father your child after you see your date...and as for tonight, we are going to dinner and then bowling."

"So where did you meet this guy?"

"Shut up and turn the damn TV off and let's get going."

I drove to this small Italian resturant and we got a table towards the back of the place. He looked at me when I had requested it.

"Price of fame." I said smiling at him.

We sat down and waited.

"So what is it like dating someone that is famous."

"It's hard, we're not as free to do things, but we are coping."

Just then, Lance and JC entered my view and they walked over to the table.

"Scott, I'd like you to meet my friend Josh, Josh this is my roommate Scott."

Scott looked up and his eye flew wide open. JC was extending his hand to shake Scott's hand."

"It's nice to mee...."

"Fuck me!" Scott said not moving and staring up at Josh.

Lance leaned over Josh's shoulder.

"Sorry Scott, Josh don't do that on the first date."

Josh turn around and punched Lance in the shoulder and Scott's face turned red and kicked me under the table.

"Asshole...why didn't you tell me...I'm sitting here looking like a damn fool, god Jay...this is so uncool."

Lance sat down next to me rubbing his shoulder as Josh just stood there.

"I'm sorry Scott...maybe I should go...I don't want you to feel uncomfortable."

Scott looked up at Josh and smiled.

"Not on your life...sit down and make yourself comfortable...I wouldn't give this chance up...even if my roommate is a total asshole."

A sharp pain hit my leg as he kicked it under the table again.

"It's nice to meet you JC." Scott said extending his hand out.

"Please, call me Josh and the pleasure is all mine." Josh shook Scott's hand and then sat down next to him.

The waitress came over and went throught the specials for the night and took our drink order.

"So Scott, what do you do?"

"I'm an actor, portraying a bartender at the moment...Unfortunately, it's a role that seems to be lasting longer than I hoped it would."

JC and Scott continued to talk, as Lance and I talked quietly about our day. Through the meal, we talked and help JC and Scott get to know each other. As the story came out about the morning at the hotel in New York, I had to warn Scott that when he got to meet Justin that he shouldn't mention it.

It was real nice to see JC and Scott getting along so good and I could see in both their eyes that there was an attraction to each other. We finished up dinner and Lance grabbed the check before the waitress even had a chance to put it down. As soon as Lance was done paying the check, we headed to the bowling alley.

When we got there, Lance and JC both put on wire rimmed glasses and baseball caps, JC put his on backward. Lance looked like a hick from Mississippi, but the glasses really highlighted his eyes. We got our shoes and headed to our lane. It was near the end of the alley, but unfortunately, there was a group of four girls about 25 years old in the lane next to ours. We started our game and tried not to be noticed. I was keeping score and the others were sitting on the chairs talking softly and leaning close to each other so their faces couldn't be seen as well. After the forth frame, the girl keeping score started staring straight at us then whispering to her friends, she got up and left. A few minute later, after Lance had almost slipped and flew down the lane as he released his ball, she was back. They gathered around her and they all started talking, but me being close I could hear what they were saying.

"It's him...see..."

"Are you sure."

"Yeah...look..."

They all stopped talking and looked towards us and then went back to talking."

I leaned over to JC and Lance and whispered. "I think you've been ID'd...wanna go..."

Before they could answer, a voice spoke from behind me.

"Excuse us..."

JC and Lance looked up and I turned around. The one that had been sitting next to me was standing there with all her friend behind her.

"Um hi, I was just wondering if this was you."

She pulled a magazine out from behind her back and shoved it in my face. There infront of me was a CK add that I had posed for.

"That's him alright." Came from Scott, who had just hit the two pin for a spare.

I glared at him and turned back towards the girls. Smiling I nodded my head.

"See, I told you it was him, Can you please sign this for me."

My face turned red and I looked behind me as Scott, Josh and Lance were laughing their heads off.

"I'm sorry..Sure, I'd love to sign it for you. What's your name?"

"Becky."

"Here you go Becky."

The three of them were still laughing as I reached out to shake their hands.

"Oh, this is my friends Laura, Joyce and Debbie."

"Hi, it's nice meeting you all. I'm Jason and these idiots behind me are Scott, Josh and Lance...ya know, I bet I could get those hyenas to sign you guys some autographs."

They all looked at me like I was crazy.

"Why would we want their autographs?" Joyce said.

"Um...cause they're JC and Lance...you know from Nsync."

"Who?" said Debbie.

"Wait Debbie, that is the group you little sister listens too. you know, those little boy singers." Laura said.

"I guess, I could get her an autograph." Debbie got the pen from Becky and handed it and a piece of paper to Scott.

"Make it out to Shelly."

Scott looked a JC and Lance and then at me. I started to bust up as JC and Lance's faces turned bright red. Scott handed the paper and pen to Lance.

"Sorry, I'm not one of them."

"Oh sorry." Debbie said.

In between laughs, I was able to grab Scott's arm.

"If you'll excuse us, we have to go to the little boy's room, it was nice meeting you girls."

"It was great meeting you Jason."

"Bye, Jason." Three other voices said at once.

I waved over my shoulder as Scott and I walked towards the bathroom.

"So, what do you think of Josh?"

"You are such an ass, why didn't you tell me it was him?"

"Because, you would have had some preconceived notion about him and you wouldn't have wanted to go."

"He is so incredible looking, man those eyes."

"Ok Romeo, just remember he is just a person...he's Josh, not JC for Nsync. They are two separate people."

We finished up in the bathroom and walked out. When we returned, Lance and JC were sitting back, arms crossed over their chest and glaring at us. The girls were gone and their eyes followed us as we sat in our seats.

"What?" I said smiling at Lance.

"Oh...nothing" he said rolling his eyes up in his head.

"You're jealous...aren't you...Oh my god you two are actually jealous...That is so funny."

"Shut up"

I looked over at JC and started laughing.

"Oh I see...Just cause women notice me and little girl notice you, you two are all mad."

JC's reply was his tongue sticking out of his mouth.

"Oh you stick that thing out, you better be prepared to use it."

"Just go roll your ball...it's your turn."

I smiled at Lance. "Thanks Hun."

I got up and grabbed my bowling ball and started to walk onto the lane. I came to a stop and lined myself up and Lance started to speak.

"Ya know Josh, those girls were right...He is soooo fine."

As I brought my ball back and started to swing it forward. JC spoke up.

"And his ass is totally hot, I would eat off of it too."

I lost my concentration and I hit my leg with the ball and it rolled straight into the gutter not more than 4 feet from me. I turned around and Scott was giving JC and Lance a high five as they laughed at me.

"Well, I could do that again and still be beating you Lance."

I smiled at him and grabbed my ball as it surfaced. I walked back up and lined myself up.

"If you bowl a spare on this ball, I'll be you're slave tonight."

I turn around, smiled at him and closed my eyes. I drew the ball back, stepped forward and release the ball. I turned around with my eyes still closed and as the ball hit the pins knocking them all down, I opened my eyes and blew a kiss at Lance.

"Your ass is all mine tonight, funny boy."

He just sat there with his mouth and eyes wide open.

Scott and JC were almost on the floor laughing. We finished up the game with JC bowling a 215 game, winning by 5 point over me and 10 points over Scott...Lance couldn't even break 100.

"Hey Josh, I'm going to park it at Lance's tonight, do you think you could swing Scott by the house and drop him off."

"No problem, he said winking at me."

We walked out into the parking lot and there parked next to my Jeep was an exact duplicate. The only difference was the license plates. Mine read "JAYSJEEP" and the one next to it read "JCSJEEP".

"See Jay, what did I tell you."

"Shut up Lance"

"What's going on?"

"Well Scott, your roommate and JC are twins. That's JC's Jeep."

"No way...really...damn, that is so errie."

"Knock it off Lance, or you're going to be watching these two twins in their twin jeeps driving off while your ass is standing in this parking lot."

"Hey Jay...It's ok..there is no one I'd rather be twins with on this earth." Josh said as he pushed Lance towards my jeep.

We all jumped in our respective jeeps and as I started mine up, Lance reached over and ejected the CD out of my stereo.

"Hey Scott, what's Josh got in his stereo."

Scott reached over and ejected Josh's CD.

"Savage Garden"

"What did I tell you." Lance yelled as he waved my Savage Garden CD back and forth in his hand.

"Damn." Scott yelled as Josh pulled away.

"Listen here you bleach headed slave of mine, if you don't put my CD back in and buckle your seat belt...you are going to be in for one pain filled night."

He smiled at me and put my CD back in and buckled his seat belt as I took off.

"I'm sorry Jay...I was just having some fun."

"Please just drop it Lance...I'm not mad...but can you please stop comparing us.. it's almost as if you have a thing for Josh and you are trying to make me sound as if I were him."

He didn't reply and when I looked over at him, his head was down and he was looking at his hands as he picked at one of his fingernails.

"Lance....do you have feeling for Josh." I said as I reached over and placed my hand on top of his to stop his fiddling."

As I continued to drive toward Lance's house, it was very quiet. I kept looking over at him, but he was looking out the side of the Jeep. I pulled into his driveway and stop the engine and looked over at him. He was looking back at me with tears in his eyes.

"Yes....I have always loved him...I'm sorry Jay, but there will always be a part of me that loves him."

"Come on Lance...Let's go into the house and talk...ok."

We both got out of the Jeep and heading into his house. I sat down on the couch and motioned him to join me. He sat next to me and I pulled him over so the back of his head was resting on my chest and gathered him into my arms.

"Ok...now talk..."

"I don't know what to say...I mean...Josh and I are friend and all, but I have always felt an attraction towards him...with the group and all, I knew I couldn't act on my feelings and I didn't even know he was gay....Everyone already knew I was gay, but when he came out to us, he looked at me as a brother...not how the rest of the guys feel about each other, but a true brother...one that knew what he felt...what he was going through...I knew I couldn't act on my feelings...I couldn't risk something happening between us that would ruin us...our bond...our brotherhood...our friendship."

"So you never told him?"

"No...but I knew that he was so right for me...I think that is what attracted me to you...you have so many qualities that he has...I just didn't realize how similar you two really are...Please forgive me Jay...I do love you for who you are...not because I think that you can replace Josh in my heart."

"I know you love me Lance...and I can see how much you love Josh and don't apologize for what you feel in your heart. I understand where you are coming from...and I know what you are going through...The qualities that first attracted me to you are the same qualities that my friend Kyle possesses and that I have always loved in him. These are the qualities that I seek out in a man. I think a person's heart find a quality in someone that it needs to find happiness and searches it out in others."

"I promise that I will not compare you and Josh anymore."

"If it helps you to love me more by comparing me to Josh, you can do it when ever you want. I don't mind...Josh is a great guy and if you see qualities in me that remind you of him....I'm honored."

I hugged him tighter and he twisted his body and stretched up and kissed me. We broke and he snuggled into my chest.

"I shouldn't be telling you this, but Josh has a thing for you too."

"Shut up."

"I'm serious, he told me. So are you going to dump me and run to him."

"I can't...I'm your slave...remember...and besides.....I love you too much."

"I love you too...I grant you your freedom...just don't bet against me anymore, you'll lose."

He was about to say something, but I put my finger up to his lips.

"I know, I know...just like Josh."

I switched off the lamp next to the couch and we fell asleep in each other's arms.

With Lance's recording schedule and my schedule, the three weeks in Orlando flew by. We spent as much time together as possible and we even had a chance to spend some nights with each of the guys. It was fun to get to know each of them separately.

They had to appear in court for their lawsuit and were in a good mood cause they would be able to keep the name Nsync. But I tried my best not to bring up the subject of the lawsuit. I knew none of them wanted to talk about it and I respected their wish. Scott and Josh went out a few time together and got along great.

On our last night together in Orlando, Lance and I had a quiet candle lit dinner at his house. We ate, danced, talked, cried, made love and spent the whole night in each others arms. We watched the sun rise in his backyard wrapped in blankets and held each other until it was time for Lance to catch his plane. I wouldn't see him until we met up in California, another two and a half weeks.

I had finally got into a comfort zone where I was at ease being separated from Lance. I knew that our relationship was stable and I was happy. About a week after they had left Orlando, Scott had come home from a night out and had a little too much to drink. I was sitting on the couch and he collapsed onto the couch next to me, laying on his back and covering his eyes with his arm. I turned the TV off and it was quiet for about 3 minutes.

"Jay....how do you do it...don't you miss him."

"I do miss him, but I have a life to live as does he...we just have to accept it... now does this conversation have to do with Lance and me or does this have more to do with Josh and you?"

"I just don't know...we come from such different worlds...I don't know if I can handle it...We get along great, but we are such different people."

"What do you mean different...just cause he is famous, doesn't mean he isn't the same as you or me...He just has to live his life a little differently."

"That's not what I mean...I don't know...it's just we been seeing each other for over two weeks and he hasn't let me do anything more than kiss him...it's just frustrating, you know."

"Scott, this is all pretty new to him. He hasn't really had the chance to be in a relationship, let alone one that society frowns upon. Give him some time."

"I don't know if I can...I'm not as stong as you...I don't know if I can wait... I just....."

Scott got up and left the room, entered his bedroom and closed the door.

"Shit..." I said to myself as I headed off to my room.

Scott pretty much avoided me for the next few day. I got a call from Lance on Thursday.

"Jay...what's on your schedule for Monday?"

"Nothing, I have Monday and Tuesday off, Why?"

"Fly to New York, we're going to be taping the Rosie O'Donnell show on Monday."

"Oh too cool."

"Yeah, it's great. It's just going to be us on the show and it's going to air the day after Thanksgiving. I got you a ticket so you can be in the audience."

"Alright, I've always wanted to see the show live."

"Hey Jay...Has Scott mentioned anything to you about Josh?"

"A little, Why?"

"Nothing, it's just that Josh hasn't been himself the last few days. On Sunday, Josh got a phone call from Scott and he has been real down since then. I don't think he's heard from him since."

"Well we tried, I guess it wasn't meant to be."

"Damn...I had hoped that Josh would find happiness...like us."

"Me too."

"Well I can't wait to see you on Monday...I love you Jason."

"I love you to James."

"Hey...what happened to Lance?"

"I don't know, what happened to Jay?"

"I love him too."

"Oh you think you're so funny."

"I am"

"Goodbye Lance."

"Bye, I love you."

"I love you too."

I hung up the phone and for some reason, my other hand was patting my chest. I had the biggest smile on my face and tears in my eyes...Man was I in love. He had done what no other person could do...he had captured my heart.

Next: Chapter 11: Unseen Moments 7


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