Open Arms 4
Disclaimer: This story is a work of Fiction. It is not meant to reflect the true sexuality of anyone mentioned within, especially not NICK CARTER or any member of the Backstreet Boys and is strictly taken from the author's over-active imagination. If you are too young or it is illegal for you to continue, DON'T. The author takes NO responsibility whatsoever for any harm that is caused to anyone by reading this etc. so if you're not supposed to be here, GO AWAY, please.
**Author's Note: Once again, I'd like to thank every single one of you who has written, your comments keep me going. I'm so sorry that i haven't even been able to get back to even a half of you,I'm sorry, and I really do appreciate the time you took to read the story and write to me . I promise, I will write back to all of you soon. Any comments, suggestions or criticisms would be appreciated, any flames will be fed to my email's trash can. Input and comments are ALWAYS welcome.
And to Lucas, author of BECAUSE YOU LOVED ME (the best story on NIFTY) write to me man, I haven't heard from you in 4EVER!!!**
So here's chapter 4, I hope you like it.
Carter
Thank you to `you know who' for the ultimate inspiration, you make my life worth living.
Now on to the story.
OPEN ARMS- CHAPTER 4 by Carter ( nicksxtacy@hotmail.com )
"Brian....I'm..gonna....i'm going to...." Nick fumbled for the right words, as his entire body reacted to the stress. All of a sudden he broke into a sweat, his heart started pounding and his eyes began to release an endless stream of tears.
Brian looked up at the slender blond before him and stared into the crying blue eyes. He wanted to wipe his friends tears away, but felt the importance of keeping his hands locked with Nick's. He didn't know whether to speak or to wait for Nick to finish. He couldn't stand watching Nick suffer, but he had already said everything that could be said. To continue to say the same words over and over, restating his friendship, care and devotion wasn't working so he kept his eyes and hands locked with Nick's and waited for Nick to speak.
"Brian, I'm....not exactly sure what to say.....It's more difficult an issue than I can express but you have to promise me that you will understand that I just can't tell you everything right now. I'm going through a hard time," the words started coming to Nick and he decided to just say them, and he partially let down his guard that he had been keeping alert for years, "and I don't think that telling you everything right now will really improve things a great deal.You have to trust me on this one Bri....I'm trying to figure things out the best way that i can without hurting you or myself..." it was barely out before Nick regretted his last sentence.
"What do you mean before you hurt me? Nicky, if this involves me in any way, you have to let me know what I can do to make things right. What could be bothering you so much and that involves me. Nicky, please....let me in." Brian pleaded, gripping Nick's hands even more tightly than before.
"Brian, please, one day I hope and I pray it will all make sense, to both of us, but for now, I'm almost as confused as you are." Nick's eyes conveyed his sentiments as much as did his words, and Brian couldn't help but agree to his bestfriend's terms.
"Nickolas, i'm going to help you. I'm going to do everything I possibly can to fix things for you, so as soon as you're ready, just let me know. And don't ever feel like you have to worry about my feelings, because your happiness is more important than whether something could hurt me or not. Whenever you're ready, I'm here....but now, can we pleeeease go somewhere else, I don't think I can stay up here any longer without fainting..."
"Oh God Brian, I completely forgot, you must be totally freaked out. I still can't believe that you'd come up here for me. Let's go grab something to eat." Nick felt a sense of relief as he reached a new understanding with Brian. It was out in the open that Nick was suffering and although he still held so much locked inside, it was comforting to know that Brian was that understanding and would now be able to support him, while understanding the need to not pressure him.
Nick stared out the windows of the elevators as they made their quick descent to the base of the Eiffel Tower. Brian settled for watching his friend's expressions as he felt and respected Nick's need for silence. It was obvious to the older boy that Nick was deep in thought contemplating what had just happened, and that he needed some time to reflect. Brian decided that they should head back to the hotel and grab something to eat in his room and maybe watch something on TV. The relaxed no pressure atmosphere would probably do Nick some good, rather than forcing him to go out or allowing him to retreat to his own room alone. He smiled a genuine smile and silently thanked God as they reached solid ground again. Brian watched as Nick hailed them a taxi and instructed the driver to take them to the hotel.
Nick and Brian entered the hotel and proceeded to check in. Brian allowed Nick to make the decision as to whether he wanted to share rooms or whether he wanted his own room. Brian felt a slight disappointment when Nick chose to take his own room, but he kept silent, realizing that he had to let Nick have his space or risk pissing Nick off and possibly ruining his chances at ever getting through to him.
"Bri, I'm gonna head up to my room and have a shower, and then I'll order some room service, K? I guess I'll see you tomorrow morning."
"Ok, Nicky, why don't you go ahead and have a shower, while I take care of some stuff and then come over to my room and we can get room service together and watch a movie or something." Brian tried to sound innocent, not wanting Nick to feel like he was under parental supervision.
"Sure Bri, I can do that. I'll see you in about an hour then," Nick gave in, as he started walking away, knowing that spending time with Brian was going to be hell, watching him and not being able to hold him, touch him, kiss him but he agreed, knowing that Brian was feeling uneasy and would worry about him the whole time they were apart. Before heading upstairs, Nick turned back and called to his band mate, "Oh and Bri, thanks for today, it meant a lot."
Brian smiled back at Nick as he watched the boy enter the elevator. Brian snapped out of his trance as he heard someone speaking to him. He turned back to the woman at the check-in counter and decided she could probably be the best person help him since she obviously didn't realize who he was and she seemed to be pretty fluent in English.
"Umm...excuse me sir, May I just say that you and your boyfriend make the cutest couple. I took the liberty of assigning you adjoining rooms so that you just have one door between you." the check-in woman flashed a rather suggestive look at Brian. He blushed shades of red that he never knew possible and considered what she had said. `Ha, me and Nick a couple? Now that's a joke, if I ever heard one...' he thought to himself.
"I appreciate it Miss, but we are not a couple, just friends..." Brian tried to explain.
"Ahhh, well then Monsieur, I wish you the best of luck, don't forget it, Paris is the city of romance...Here this may be of use to you" she continued on with the suggestive tone as she slipped something into Brian's hand. He looked down to realize that she had given him a key to Nick's room. He was about to give it back to her when he realized that it may come in handy.
"Thank you Miss. Now I was wondering if you could tell me where the nearest jeweler is." " Yes, of course, Monsieur" she said as she handed him a catalog "if you see anything in here that you'd like, we can order it for you and have it delivered to your room as soon as possible." Brian thanked her and took a seat in the lobby and set to work on his task.
Meanwhile, in Nick's room, he was panting heavily on the bed as he pictured Brian's body and ran his long fingers lightly up and down his hard dick. He gripped it tightly just below the head and just savored the feel of his cock pulsing as he knew that every ounce of blood pumping through his body, heading for his groin was throbbing for Brian. After spending the afternoon with Brian, there was no way to calm his hard-on other than relieving it. He sped up the pounding with his right hand as he reached for his cell phone with the left hand. He hit the speed dial button and listened for the ringing to end. Finally the voice he was waiting for began to play, "Hey, hey wassup, you have reached my house and I'm never here, so why are you bugging my machine? Just kidding with you...Anyways, I don't know when I'll be home, so why don't you give me a call on my cell phone, unless of course, you don't have that number, which must mean I don't really want to talk to you, no matter what, just leave me a message, Ok? And don't forget, I love you all!!". As Brian's angelic voice and laughter played over the phone, Nick's face contorted to expressions of pleasure as silent tears ran down his cheeks, mixing with the sweat that broke out all over his body. Nick suddenly flipped onto his stomach and thrust his long penis into the pillows beneath him as he pictured Brian's gorgeous ass below. He moaned out loud and then bit his lip in passion. The voice played over and over in his head as did images of Brian. Nick's favorite memory was Brian walking out of the shower with just a white towel clung to his waist. Nick could just imagine himself grabbing Brian from behind and fucking Brian against a wall, his hands running lightly over Brian's small but hard nipples and sucking on the older man's neck as Brian would reach around pulling Nick deeper into him. Nick bit down on a pillow in order to keep from screaming as he pumped his thick cream onto the sheets beneath him.
Nick lay still for just a few seconds, completely spent from the powerful orgasm before heading into the shower to clean himself off. As he emerged from the shower he searched through his suitcases which had been pre-delivered to his room and tried to find the perfect thing to wear. He knew that it really didn't matter, since he wasn't going out, but he still felt a desire to look decent around Brian. He chose to wear a loose fitting pair of Tommy jeans and a baggy Tommy sweatshirt and after looking in the mirror for several minutes he realized what was missing. He brought his hand to his chest and clutched at what should have been there. His necklace. For four years, the gift from Brian had been his security. Living a constantly changing, non-stop life, the necklace had been the one constant in his life. No matter where he went, what he was doing, day, night, weekend weekday, 24/7, Nick Carter wore the chain and it meant the world to him. It wasn't just a possession, but a symbol of the truest love that Nickolas had ever known.
As he felt his eyes moisten, he told himself that he wouldn't let himself become a nervous reck once again. He forced himself to stop crying and then headed over to the door that separated his room from Brian's. He knocked and waited and then repeated the actions for five minutes. Where is he?' wondered Nick as he checked his watch once more. It had been over an hour since he had left Brian, and he knew Brian had said they'd meet in an hour. He picked up the phone and dialed the hotel operator and then asked to be connected to Brian's room. After twenty rings, Nick hung up, convinced that Brian was indeed not in the room. Nick made his way to the bed and fell onto the now dry sheets. He buried his face in the pillow as he reached over the side of the bed and grabbed his discman. As he pressed PLAY' and put the headphones on, he set the CD to repeat OPEN ARMS and lay still on the bed. He couldn't figure out whether he was glad or not that he couldn't get a hold of Brian. As much as he had been worried about spending the evening with Brian, this was just one more reminder of the loneliness that he'd feel once Brian was married to LeighAnn. The events of the past day began to take a toll on the blond and he settled into a deep sleep.
Once he had completed the order form, Brian paid the girl at the counter, and she once again wished him good luck. He played along, thanked her and headed upstairs. As he glanced at his watch, he panicked, realizing that he was 45 minutes late meeting Nick. After he entered his room, he headed over to the door that separated his room and Nick's and knocked. Nick, who was sound asleep and deeply engrossed in a dream, with his discman continuously playing couldn't possibly have been able to hear the knocking. The key in Brian's pocket was tempting him, but he figured that Nick had probably gone out to get something to eat instead. He looked around his room for the first time and upon seeing the phone next to the bed, he figured he'd give Nick a call and see if he'd answer the phone. Before he could reach the phone, it rang. He picked it up, expecting it to be Nick.
"Hello..."
"Brian!! Where were you for the past six hours? I've been calling since this afternoon?" the sharp voice echoed through the room, and had anyone else been somewhere in Brian's room, they would have heard every word clearly.
"Oh, hi LeighAnn, babe. How are you my love?" Brian turned on the charm, hoping to ease her anger.
"Don't even try to sleep talk me? Where have you been for the past few hours? Do you know how many times I've tried to call? Why didn't you call?" LeighAnn kept up her questioning and Brian sat down on the bed, realizing that it would take quite some time to calm her.
Meanwhile, next door, Nick was slipping deeper and deeper into his dream. The images before him were so clear that he let himself be dragged into the dream world. He saw Brian, wearing white pants and a white jacket, looking just as perfect as ever. Brian was standing on the sidewalk waiting to cross the street. Nick was walking about a block behind Brian and was quickening his steps, trying to decrease the distance between himself and his dreamlover. Behind Brian was a man, just slightly taller than Brian and slightly younger looking. As Nick watched in horror, the curly haired man grabbed Brian by the jacket and thrust him into the middle of the busy street before him. Brian fell onto the cement street and could barely budge, he was so deeply in shock. Nick was sprinting through the crowd on the sidewalk, desperately trying to get to Brian, and save him from the speeding cars. Right before Nick could reach Brian, he saw the curly haired man turn to face him. Instantly Nick recognized the sinister look, and realized that the criminal was Justin Timberlake. Nick pushed him out of the way, and jumped in front of the oncoming traffic. It was all a blur, as the cars honked, skidded and braked. All Nick could see, was Brian's frail figure trying to get up. Just as Brian got up on a knee, he was struck by a big black car which sent him flying over it's windshield and right into the path of yet another car. Nick watched in terror as Brian was hurled through the air. He tried to reach him but suddenly realized that he was being held in place by two pairs of hands. When he turned around to see his attackers, through his tears he could see that he was being held by Justin Timberlake and LeighAnn, Brian's fiance. Nick kicked both of them and tore himself out of their grips. Nick screamed with all his might as he ran towards his dying love. Nick reached Brian and cradled Brian's bleeding face in his hands. Nick was hysterically crying, and screaming as he felt Brian slipping further and further into unconsciousness.
"Brian, please, don't leave me, I love you. Brian more than anything, I love you.... PLEASE...... BRIAAAAAANNNNNN!!!! Don't leave me...." Nick sobbed and screamed frantically as he held Brian in his arms. Nick remained in the middle of the street and wouldn't let go of Brian as many stunned pedestrians and motorists tried to get him to come out of the street. "Brian, I can't live without you, don't leave me please, I love you!!!"
Sitting in his room, Brian had just hung up the phone after calming LeighAnn down. Just as he was about to try knocking once more on Nick's door he heard sobbing and crying, accompanied with screaming coming from the other side of the door. Brian pounded on the door while reaching for the spare key in his pocket. As he opened the door, he saw Nick lying on the bed shaking, crying and still screaming. Brian gathered the convulsing boy into his arms and cradled Nick's head in his arms.
"Nicky, wake up, it's just a dream, wake up Frack, WAKE UP..." Brian pleaded with Nick as he gently rocked and shook Nick, hoping to wake him and end his suffering.
"Brian, I love you.....Don't die, please don't leave me...I love you, I love you, Bri, please, how can you leave me. Dear God, please don't take him from me....Brian, we were supposed to be together. I love him God, please, please, please don't take him from me... Brian, I love you don't ever leave me..." the young blond continued to clutch at a pillow sobbing and shaking. Brian barely slowed his attempts to calm Nick as the words coming from Nick's mouth shocked him beyond belief. He hugged Nick closer to his chest, rocking him with more and more urgency Brian looked around the room as he heard three gasps coming from the open door leading to his own room. When Brian glanced at the door he saw the three remaining Backstreet Boys all frozen in shock, all having obviously heard Nick's screaming.
"Did Nicky just say what I think he said?" Howie asked without taking his eyes off of Brian and Nick. If he hadn't known better, it would appear as though Nick and Brian were a couple, it all seemed so perfect, except for the fact that Nick was hysterical and couldn't stop shaking.
"Fuck man, forget that for now, we have got to help Nick, this is serious, he's not coming out of it" even the usually laid-back AJ was now becoming panicked as he looked at Kevin for help. Kevin and AJ made their way over to the bed, while Howie remained unmoving at the door. Seeing that Brian was also quite shaken up and had also begun to cry, Kevin eased Brian from under Nick and motioned for AJ to try his luck with Nick. AJ pulled Nick into a half-sitting, half lying position, and did his best to hug Nick and talk Nick out of his dream. Brian clutched onto Kevin and sobbed onto his older cousin's shoulder.
"What have I done to him Kevin? What have I done wrong? I don't know what I did. All I did was talk to him, I swear Kevin, that's all, then he came up to his room and then I heard him screaming. I swear I didn't think I did anything wrong cuz" Brian could no longer contain his frustration at everything. The unshed tears of his unhappiness because of Leighann and Nick's distancing from him and now this unleashed all the tears that he had held inside.
"Shhh...don't worry Brian, we'll get him help, it's all going to be okay, don't worry," Kevin tried to maintain his composure as he felt vulnerable for the first time in years. He genuinely did not know what to do, but knew he had to be the strong one. "Howie, get on the phone and call an ambulance now, this is obviously more serious than just a bad dream because he's not waking up or coming out of it." Howie went into Brian's room to make the call so as to not watch the disturbing scene before him. AJ brushed Nick's hair out of his face and reached looked for something to wipe the sweat and tears from Nick's face.
"Yo Kev, can you grab me a towel or something to wipe his face. And pass me a shirt too, he's soaked his sweatshirt he's sweating so much" AJ called Kevin more so to tell Kevin that Nick was burning up without alarming Brian by saying it outloud. Kevin headed over to Nick's bed, as Brian went over to Nick's suitcase to grab a towel and shirt. AJ motioned for Kevin to feel Nick's forehead. Before he could decide what to do Howie came back into the room.
"Kevin, I can't get a hold of the ambulance, I don't speak French, I don't know who to call or what to ask for. And I don't want to ask front desk because if they find out who we are and this gets out, who knows what people will say. I can just see the headlines now, ` Backstreet Fag trips out ." Howie said, more concerned with the repercussions of their actions on his career rather than Nick's safety.
"Howie, what are you saying? And don't you dare call him that! I can't believe you're putting our reputation above Nicky's health! " Brian spoke the words that he and AJ were feeling.
" He's right though Brian, do we really want this to get out? They'll probably think this is drug related. We know how against drugs Nick is, but the media is just waiting for something to nail us with and that could be exactly what they want." Kevin chose to take the responsible approach.
"You three just get out of here. If you guys won't help Nick, then I will. It's no wonder he's having a nervous breakdown , he doesn't have any support from any of you. Just get out, and I'll take care of this," Brian gained control and spoke calmly.
"I agree with Brian. Nick needs us and needs our support. Maybe if we had all been just a little more helpful, Nick probably wouldn't be in this position right now. But I don't think we should get anyone else involved right now. Let's just get him cleaned up, try to calm him down and then we'll see how he's doing in the morning, and deal with it from there. I'm staying with Brian, because Nick's my little `bro and he needs me now more than ever" AJ spoke his mind as he stoked Nick's hair and helped Brian wipe the sweat and tears from Nick's face. AJ then helped Brian lift Nick's sweatshirt from his body as they wiped the sweat covering his chest. He was happy that Nick had stopped shaking and was just crying and moaning Brian's name continuously. AJ looked at Kevin and Howie who were just standing looking confused. Kevin and Howie closed the door and approached the bed.
"We're all in this together. We're a family, we're gonna pull through this." Kevin as calmly as was expected of him.
"Yeah, yeah, we'll stay but if the little faggot makes a move on me he's dead." Howie burst into laughter at his own joke.
"Shut up Howie. Either you're here and supportive or you can leave." Brian gave Howie his options and then returned his attention to Nick. He didn't want to admit it, but he was glad that they all stayed because he really didn't want to be left alone in case Nick got worse. He pulled back the covers and him and AJ layed Nick in a comfortable position. Nick automatically curled into the fetal position and Brian sat by his side rubbing his back and smoothing down his hair.
"Guys, I know this is all a lot to think about it, but we need to decide what we're going to do when he wakes up. What do we say? Is he really gay?" Kevin got down to business as he was used to doing, putting his emotions aside.
" Now, listen to me, all of you. I know him better than all of you, and I've got to do what's best for him. We're not going to say anything about this to him. When he wakes up, we're not going to tell him about this, or about what he said. If he remembers and makes an effort to talk about it, then okay, we'll talk when he's ready, but otherwise our story is that we heard his crying, we came in and stayed the night because we were worried. There will be no mention of what he said. I don't see why we're all making such a big deal, it was just a dream anyways." Brian used the tone, that they had all heard earlier that morning and realized not to mess with him.
"We know that you know best when it comes to Nick and whatever you decide, we'll support." AJ spoke on behalf of the last three Backstreet Boys. "So, what else do you want us to do tonight? He seems like he's calmed down. I think he's even stopped crying."
"I say, we all try to get some sleep, but one of us needs to stay up just in case he comes to." Kevin tried to regain the control of the situation.
"Why don't you all sleep in my room, just leave the door between the two rooms open so that I can call y'all if I need to . I'll stay here just in case he wakes up." Brian suggested.
AJ, Howie and Kevin all made their way into Brian's room, leaving Brian sitting next to his young friend, smoothing the silky blond hair on Nick's head.
"Good Night Bri, we're just a few steps away if you need us," Brian barely acknowledged what AJ said as he focused his attention on Nick. A thought occurred suddenly to Brian and he reached for the phone and called the front desk.
"Excuse me, I was wondering if you had a package waiting for room 569?" Brian asked the man on the phone.
"Yes sir, it has arrived, we were going to wait until the morning to deliver it." the man responded with a faint French accent.
"Well, could you please send someone up with it right now, but bring it next door to 571 please."
" Yes, Monsieur, it will be there within a few minutes. Have a good Night." the man answered before hanging up.
When the delivery man knocked on the door, Brian quickly retrieved the package and tipped the man. He then opened the package and admired the silver necklace. They didn't have the same cross with the music note that Brian had originally given to Nick, since Brian had had it custom made, but he hoped this one would be just as meaningful. It was a thick silver chain, with two silver rings. On one ring was inscribed FRICK while the other said FRACK and the two silver rings were linked with a heart. It wasn't spectacular, but it was a gift from the heart and Brian hoped Nick would be happy to have a replacement for his broken chain. He opened the clasp and placed it around his best friend's neck. Before moving away, Brian leaned in and kissed Nick on the forehead. He then wiped away the few remaining tears from Nick's face and quietly whispered, "I love you Nicky, and I'll NEVER leave you."
He walked over to the door leading to his room. Looking in, Brian saw that Howie had taken his bed, while AJ had conquered the couch, leaving Kevin to sleep on the floor. Brian grabbed his cell phone and read the message on it's screen, `YOU HAVE 7 MESSAGES in your voice mailbox'. He placed the phone to his ear and listened to the messages. After the third message, Brian figured they must have all been from LeighAnn, so he hit DELETE ALL MESSAGES and clicked off his phone. He then walked quietly over to Nick's sleeping figure and crawled into the bed next to Nick. He lay on his back and placed Nick's head on his chest, wrapping his arms around Nick, the best that he could. He had to admit it was comfortable.
Brian thought of what Nick had been yelling and it bothered him as to what Nick could possibly have been dreaming. `Why would Nick think I'd leave him? Why was he so afraid?' the questions repeated themselves in Brian's mind as he drifted to sleep, holding his best friend as he had, so many times before, when Nick had been younger. Soon enough, both Nick and Brian were peacefully asleep.
A few hours later, Kevin awoke from his uncomfortable sleep and crept into Nick's room to see whether or not anything had changed. What he did see made him smile, and reconsider what he had thought the previous day. `They do make an adorable couple, and they're so perfect for each other. They'd make each other so happy' he thought. He didn't think that Brian was gay, but now he was doubting Nick, especially after what had escaped his lips during his sleep. Gay or not, Kevin knew one thing, his youngest brother needed serious help and he needed to make sure they were all doing their best to help him.
TO BE CONTINUED
*** I HOPE YOU ALL LIKED IT. PLEASE EMAIL ME AT: nicksxtacy@hotmail.com AND LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK. STAY TUNED!