Opening of a Closet Heart Opening of a Closet Heart
Chapter / Part 2
By Robert (bthsburgess@hotmail.com)
This is my first story. I hope everyone enjoys it and I hope that you give lots of comments / feedback (esspecially any grammar / spelling errors you find that I didnt... sorry in advance for those). If it's illegal for you to read this material, then dont read it. Otherwise, please enjoy.
Latest Chapter / Part 1:
Inside the house, Ben rested his forehead against the door and bit his bottom lip. He sucked in a deep breath of air. ‘God… I’m so stupid’ he thought to himself. He put his hands on the sides of his head and rubbed the hair on the back of his head. ‘So, So Stupid.’
There could not have been a worse situation at home. There was parents, there was police, there was witnesses and on lookers. The kidnapped kid had found his way home… and so the hugs, kisses, and questions started. First the mother, then the police, then the mother with the police… all of it was just a nightmare and two.
I finally decided that I had had enough and started walking inside, but I was being followed.
“STOP! Don’t you think you can leave me alone for two fucking seconds? I just had a lot happen to me and I want to be alone… ok? So BACK OFF!” I slammed the front door, almost hitting a police officer with it.
‘That was probably the most aggressive thing I have ever done…’ I thought to myself. ‘I hope I don’t get in trouble for that…’
I walked up the stairs to my room and sat on the end of the bed. It didn’t take long before my mother was knocking on the door.
“Ryan, do you want to talk?” she was so quiet, she was trying to make me feel comfortable even though she was raging with anger, sadly, it wasn’t working.
“Hey Mom, tell them all that I’m OK, nothing is wrong, and I will be fine until tomorrow. If they need more information, they can talk to me at school tomorrow. I need sleep, I’m turning in.”
“Well Ryan, all these people are here and… why are you going to bed?! Its only 7:00pm!” she was screaming again.
“I’m very tired, and I just need time to think, ok? Please just let me be for a little while, ok?”
There was silence outside the door. I heard her storming down the stairs, finally. I took in a deep breath and lay back on my bed. The entire day had just flooded back into my mind… but I could only think about one thing… Ben. I kept telling myself ‘look you’re not gay’ but I don’t think it could have been any more obvious in my mind. I was gay, I was totally gay, and I would do every minute of what had happened to me again just so that I see Ben before tomorrow.
I sat back and pull the covers over me, in just moments I was asleep.
I woke up to the tapping at my door. My mother was trying to pump me for information again. I ignored her for a few minutes, but she kept yelling for me to get up so I finally just stood up, opened the door and screamed random gibberish for no real reason, then slammed it again. I think it went to the tune of “boogili-boogala-imemo”. I was definitely known at school for spontaneous outbursts like that, so it was just business as usual.
I headed over to my closet and looked around for some clothes. I thought about what Ben was wearing yesterday, and decided I would try and match. I found a pair of black jeans, but I don’t find any black shirts. I decided to grab up a navy blue shirt I had and I headed down stairs.
When I hit the bottom of the stairs, I could hear my mother talking to me but I completely ignored her and walked straight out front door and down to the corner. The bus was normally early, so it would only be a few minutes before it showed up. I looked down the street for a few friends in the neighborhood, and I saw Kevin walking around the corner.
“Hey Kevin!” I yelled out just when he came within range of hearing me.
“Sup?” he asked in his normal laid back morning sleep mentality.
“Nothing much man.”
“What was all that shit at your house last night, bro?”
“Family problems.” I laughed a little bit just to show him I was comfortable.
“Ah, right, right, been there done that. Unfortunately my mother burned the T-shirt.”
We both laughed as the rest of the kids came up around the corner and the bus pulled up. It was funny to see them all run like hell. The bus had come a little too early and they were still near the end of the street.
I stepped on the bus and looked in the back. I saw Ben leaning his head against the window. I also saw Jason looking directly at me from the 3rd seat to the front. I nodded to Jason and walked to the back, I sat down next to Ben. Jason turned around and looked back at me and was mouthing ‘what happened’ but I ignored him and looked at Ben.
“Sorry about yesterday.” He said without even acknowledging I had sat in the seat.
“Sorry about what?”
“What I did, I shouldn’t have done that to you.”
“It’s ok…” I wanted to say more but, but I couldn’t make the words come out. “I… it was ok.” I finally blurted out to end the silence.
Ben took his head off the window and turned and looked at me. His eyes were glossy as if he had been crying, but he looks almost angry. He was a really strong guy, but he apparently had a really sensitive side to him as well. I looked down and saw his hand, his palm facing up toward me, his fingers all spread out.
I looked up and down, left to right on the bus. I wanted to make sure no one was watching. I very slowly put my hand on top of his and he closed his fingers around mine. His legs suddenly opened up wider and his entire left leg was brushed up against my right leg. I looked down at his leg and then up at his face, he was blushing.
“I don’t think I can do this…” I started to say but I stopped as he let go of my hand and slid his left arm behind me, and pulled at my left side, sliding me against him. “Please stop!” I said somewhat loud, but he wasn’t stopping. He took his right hand and lifted up my shirt and just slightly rubbed my stomach. The bus came to a stop to let some more kids on and he quit as people were walking past us.
“Why do you keep saying no? Your entire body is telling me that you want this, and you’re not letting me give you what you want.”
I didn’t know what to say… it was true. I didn’t know what I was feeling. I was enjoying it, but for some reason my heart was saying ‘stop, don’t do it’. In my mind, he was everything I wanted, but something was stopping me.
“I don’t know…” I sighed.
“That’s what I thought.” He retorted agrily.
I looked down the bus and saw Jason staring directly at me. He had just watched everything that had happened. His mouth was halfway open and he had this weird look on his face that I hadn’t seen before.
“Listen… I need to go talk to Jason… he was there when my father… did what he did yesterday.”
“So, it was your father?”
“What? I never even told you what happened?”
“I never asked. Shit happens, deal with it. I don’t make it a point of my life to get involved in others problems. I’m there to lend a hand and a heart, not to dive into their problems and make them mine.”
I sat back and looked at Ben; he had a stern look on his face. I couldn’t tell what he was getting at, but he was angry at something. He looked like he had just been hurt. I reached over and impulsively grabbed at his crotch with my right hand and tugged at his pants. As soon as I realized what I was doing I stopped and flicked my hand away and instantly looked straight down. I noticed I was hard and it was obvious. I was blushing; I could feel my cheeks roaring.
“Ah…” Ben was hard as a rock and was fidgeting back and forth in the seat. “Fuck…” he whispered as he dropped his head against the window and looked straight over at me. “Fuck…” he said again as he took his hand and slid it behind my back again, rubbing my back.
“Ben…” My cock was in pain in my shorts. “Ben… lets go to the bathroom when we get off the bus.” My mind was running all cylinders. I needed this. The bus was just pulling into the school’s parking lot.
“Fuck…” Ben just said again looking at me and rubbing my back.
The bus stopped and I jumped up and almost ran off the bus and headed toward the bathroom in the middle of the school. It was one of three bathrooms that could be locked from the inside. As soon as Ben came through the doors after me, I pulled the door shut and locked it. He instantly grabbed me by the sides and started kissing me.
I couldn’t handle it; it was too much for me. My cock was about to explode in my pants, and I let Ben know by shaking my hand against his hip and pushing his sides down. He dropped to his knees.
“Oh… god….” I said breathing heavy as he pushed me against the door and ripped my pants and boxers down in one motion. He grabbed my cock and pushed it into his mouth and within only a few seconds I was shooting my load in his mouth. “FUCK!” I screamed out as he kept sucking on the head and swallowing as much of me as he could. He kept sucking my cock, slurping ever last drop he could out before he got onto his feet and kissed me hard.
All of the sudden, all those feelings I had inside me came up. ‘I’m not gay!’ was racing through my brain. I pushed him away from me and grabbed my pants and pulled them up. “Ben, I…” he looked at me almost confused. “I don’t know what just happened, I’m not gay, I’m not gay, I swear. I can’t take this. I don’t know what to do. I’m so sorry.” I was tripping over myself trying to get away from him and get out of the bathroom. “I’m so…” I couldn’t find the words anymore. I hit the lock on the door to the bathroom and bolted out but was tripped by the person standing in front of me. I looked up and saw Jason looking down at me.
“Ja-Jason” I said quickly scrambling to my feet. Ben was looking at me as the door shut. He was against the wall and slowly sliding down into a sitting position. There was cum on his shirt, spit on his chin, and his cock was a huge tent in his pants. He just slid down the wall and sat down as I got up and pushed my way past Jason and down the hall. “I’m sorry Jason, I’ll talk to you later!” I yelled over my shoulder as I scattered down the hall.
Jason turned and opened the door and walked inside slowly. He saw Ben and bent down.
“Are you ok?”
“Fine.” Ben looked at Jason and stood up. He had a fire in his eyes.
“What happened?”
“Nothing.” Ben shoved Jason out of his way and headed down the hall, using his shirt to wipe the spit of his chin as he rubbed the cum out of his shirt the best he could.
I was running and I didn’t stop running down the hall until I hit the doors at the auditorium that lead outside. I followed the wall around to the back and fell down against the wall at the back of the auditorium. I sat there and I began to cry. My body was doing these things, not me. In my heart, I knew I loved girls. I was NOT gay! My head was going crazy, and all these feelings were just fake. I didn’t love a guy. I COULDN’T love a guy. I’m straight!
These feelings and emotions repeated in my head several times. I shut my eyes and put my head against the wall and just tried to think clearly. I was interrupted when a large figure picked me up and I felt my head bang against the wall. I opened my eyes and I saw Ben standing there holding me by the shirt and pushing me hard against the wall.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” he screamed at me.
“Ben, I, I don’t-, I don’t know what’s going on!”
“The hell you don’t! What the fuck is wrong with you? Can’t you tell how I feel about you? Can’t you tell how you feel about me? Isn’t it obvious to you?!”
“Ben…” I grabbed his arms with my hands and I felt him loosen his grip on me. “I don’t know what I’m feeling right now. I’m not gay! I know I’m not gay. I don’t know why I’m doing these things! I don’t kn-“ I was cut off as he pushed me against the wall and kissed me. My body fell limp and I rubbed my tongue against his and made out with him for what seemed like hours.
“You may not be gay…” he whispered to me as he slowly let go of me. “But I am in love with your body… and I know you’re in love with mine.” Ben pulled at the top of his pants and dropped them on the ground. His cock was pointed straight at me. He grabbed my hand and pushed it against him. “How do you feel now?”
I slowly applied more and more pressure to his cock. I slowly started moving my hand around it and playing with it. He started breathing heavy and he leaned against me. I kept touching him and I felt him leaking on my hand. “Ben… I want you.”
He looked up at me and gave me a small kiss. “Are you sure, Ryan?”
“Yes.” I knew it now, I was gay. I was totally gay, but I wasn’t in love. This was lust. I noticed it for certain. This was total cock, balls, and ass, get off and run. It was lust.
I dropped to my knees and he pushed up against me. He grabbed the back of my head and shoved his entire cock into my mouth. I gagged and tried to pull back but his hands were holding it against me. He kept shoving it into me and almost completely down my throat. I felt him expand and he shot straight into me. He slowly pulled out and I looked up at him gasping for air, my face beaming red.
“Fuck… Ryan…”
“I couldn’t breathe!” I gasped as I started taking in long breaths.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know.”
“God, why did you do that?”
“I don’t know, I was really hot.”
I laughed at him and pulled at his sides. I pushed my nose up against his balls and licked the bottom of his cock. “Next time be more careful, jesus.”
“Sorry buddy…” we were both laughing. “Come on we better get to class.”
“Hey, Ben…” I looked up at him as he pulled up his pants. “I’m sorry… I didn’t know what to think earlier… but now I know. I am gay.”
“That’s ok, I knew it already.” He looked down at me and smiled as he pulled me up and gave me a big kiss on the top of the head.
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