This is my first attempt at writing an erotic poem. Please give me your feed back on it and any thing else that you think I could do to make it better. I want to give this to my boyfriend, so I want it to be perfect. Tell me if you think he will like it.
He does not read erotic poetry, but we talk like this all the time. Please help me with this one.
THANKX ALOT!
VCnet@Ripco.com
Here it is...
"TOGETHER AS ONE" by: VCnet@Geocities.com
We look at each other, eye to eye With a spark of burning lust deep within our souls, Our lips meet, softly with a warm and sweet peck. They slowly part and our tongues to meet so wet. We hold each other in a passionate embrace, Our bodies come closer with as we loose track Of all time and all space. I feel the heat of your body against my soft skin, I feel your desire reaching for me again and again. The warm tender feelings That we share surround us. Our tongues dance in a hurried pace, With such passion and full of grace. You slowly and quietly move to my neck, I feel your sweet breath as it tickles my skin. I am filled with ecstasy as you blow in my ear, I now can feel your hands on my rear. Your sweet wind in my ear is replaced with your tongue, As I slip in to the full power that your desire has over me. Your tongue explores my ear as I enter paradise, I loose all inhibitions, At least for tonight.
I pull away from your sweet loving grip, So that I may send you on your own ecstasy trip. I press your body up against mine, I lick your neck with my tongue And I know it is mine. You moan in soft whispers You make a sweet melody, Of how good it feels so good: Never let go of me! Our lips meet once more in a deep probing kiss, I think of how much time, you I have missed. As our clothes become looser and fall to the ground. We continue to kiss, I suck on your lips, Our bodies bump and grind.
You lay me down in your bed, Soft like a rose. I kiss you again, just a peck on the nose. You lick my body, as if to search For the best spot to "brand" your lover.
I breathe deeply, I feel your teeth make a bitter sweet bite, Right on my chest, where it will last for more than tonight. You move to my nipple with a flick of your tongue, And you send bolts of pleasure: through me it runs. Your tongue licks me all over, As if to tease. My pleasure is unwrapped by your kisses all over me.
I now lick your chest, Every spot I can get. As if it were a caramel treat, the kind I love best. Your hands guide my head, to the places you love most. I then feel your hard member, Pressed hard against my chest. With the most gentle of motions, You move my head lower As I see you are growing, Stronger and bolder.
Your manhood swells as I lift it to the tip of my lips, But I tease it and move down to your hips. I lick from your hips, down to your thighs Massaging and caressing your body as I search without my eyes. I'm finding new spots, Of which you never knew. Your pleasure intense, As I tenderly love you.
Slowly but surely, I work back to your tip. Just as I prepare to go for a dip. I close my eyes and with sweet gentle care, I part my lips and place your warm dick there. I slowly slide down, With a teasing pace, I bring my head back up With dick still in place. You love the feeling, But you want it much faster. You guide my head, And make me suck a little faster. I feel your veins, throbbing with lust, I hold your balls, filled with nut.
I picture myself, with your dick in my mouth, Bobbing and slurping, dick in and dick out. I feel you body tensing with cumming in mind, I want this to last longer, so I take my time. I move to your lips, where we kiss again, And now you begin to take me in hand. You now hold my dick, not too hard, not too soft, Just the right pressure, As you begin to jack me off, My dick in your hand, Moving it slow. You speed up as you begin to suck my earlobe. From my ear to my neck,
you lick, suck, and nibble. At the same time from my dick, pre-cum it dribbles. Your lips silently slip from my ear to my dick, Your mouth takes me in, just the to the tip. You work from the tip, And lick to the base, You come back up to my tongue And in your mouth I am placed. I feel so good As my heart skips a beat, Your lips do magic that I feel from my head to my feet. I feel my balls churn with boiling desire, As the pleasure of orgasm burns like a fire. You stop me from comming, "No! Not just yet!"
You lift one of my legs, And then the other. Getting them out of the way. "It's all in order" You place your warm "solder," On my love hole. Its covered in lube, to loosen my hole. You look into my eyes, so tenderly As you press so gently you slip into me. With your slow thrusting, comes a kiss As I feel my hole widen to take your width. Your soul lights in me like fire. Your passion is now raging inside me with desire! You kiss me like `cause passion has taken over you, Your tongue reaching deep inside of me, as I kiss you. I know you are coming, yes I do know. You speed up now, your love grows inside. You kiss me deeply as you loose control. It's a passion frenzy, your tempo increased. He's now probing deeper, my legs still in the air. You withdraw, and over I roll. Then with animal passion, you make your next thrust. In to the hilt, you penetrate me. I feel your balls slap against me. I sense your passion, It electrifies me. Your thrusts of pleasure send fire through me. In my mind comes visions of us together, Bodies moist with perspiration, Moving together in passionate pleasure. We become one, In our sexual indulgence surrounds us. My inside stretching as your love pushes further Deep into me, as it probes my insides. I feel you and I have become one. Your love making lasts, Longer than I can. I begin to erupt, Cum every where. You pick up your pace, With an animal flair. Soon you with draw, Your white cream shoots deep in my rear.
Our bodies collapse. Dripping with sweat, Our tongues meat once more In a long passionate kiss. That makes me want more. You still deep in side me With tongue in my mouth, We settle down slowly Passion all around, us breathing lowly. I love your passion, As it has filled me inside. You embrace me with your love, My mind so serene, As I lay here as if I were in a dream. Your magic, like a spell, I am in your complete control Me and you, You and I, together, Together as One.
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VCnet (:-D) VCnet@ripco.com