Notes
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Okay, I think the secrets are going to be revealed at the end of this chapter. Once again, this chapter is supposed to have jumped a week a head. Which means it's been a week of project working for Justin and Summer. So, by now they have a small friendship brewing.
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Also, I need some suggestions on what to do. Cuz I'm bored.
Chapter 4 of Pop High
Brinnnn Brinnnn Brinnnn
Damn it, I hate alarm clocks. I hate them, they just keep ringing, and I like this feeling of comforability wrapped in AJ's arm. Is comforability a word. Could I use it in a sentence besides that one. Oh well, like it matters.
"Get up Alex."
"Huh?"
"The alarm, hit the alarm."
"Oh"
Good, he hit it. He's perfect in every way, my hero all together. I love him, okay, why am I getting sappy over him turning off the alarm clock, something is seriously wrong with me. Maybe it's my time of the month. Yes, I'm being serious. I think guys get periods too, sorta kinda. I mean, we don't bleed, or get cramps, but we get emotional once a month or so. I mean, well, I do. AJ doesn't, but that's, I don't know, it's different.
"Get up baby."
"No"
"Come on Justin, don't make me tickle you."
"I'm up."
I don't like to be tickled. I laugh, really hard, and I snort. Yeah, well, I don't snort normally when I laugh, I just do when I'm being tickled. Cuz it's like, an incessant laughter, and it just makes me snort. I used to get made fun of for it, now no one tickles me. Cuz I get really pissed, and hate them all.
"Do you love me?"
"What kind of question is that?"
"I don't know, I'm in a weird mood, and I just wanna know if my boyfriend loves me."
"Okay, well then yes."
"Well then?"
"Justin, why are you crying?"
"I'm in a weird mood okay."
"I'm sorry, I love you, I swear. Please stop crying."
How can I cry when he's kissing me? He's kissing me really good, all over, mmmmmmmmm, I like him kissing my neck, oh, I like him nibbling my neck. I like him giving me a hickey, I like him, down boy.
"I'm gonna shower Tats, you can get one in the other bathroom if you want."
"Why not with you?"
"Cuz we gotta go to school."
"Fine."
This is the way I wash my neck. This is the way I wash my back. Okay, shut up, I'm corny, it's just my thing. Anyways, what the hell are you doing in my shower with me. Get out of here you pervert.
Ring Ring Ring
"I wish Joey was in lunch. I miss his jokes and shit like that."
"Me too. He was a fun guy to have around. Plus, he was friendly and bought me lunch."
Sometimes I wonder if all Christina thinks about is money and friendly people. Friendly people in the girl definitons at my table are basically guys willing to sleep with them. Which is about every one in the school besides all the gay people. Which are about ten of us. Although a few gay people in our school might like to, okay, not guys, but hell if I think they wouldn't mind as long as they were getting off. I think Christina and Britney are worst then players, in fact, they are female players.
"Hi baby. What can I get you today?"
"Well you can get me a hoagie."
"And what would my baby like to drink?"
"How about a pepsi, oh no, make it a pink lemonade."
"No problem, be back in a sec."
"Thank you"
"What would my baby like? How cute? Seriously, some times you two can be a little sick. I don't mind you dating, but I could live without the cutesy wootsy shit."
"Very funny Kevin. Ya know you like to think about us being hot and tight."
"Oh, that was sick, dude, seriously."
I love doing that. I love making them squirm. But sometimes they deserve it. I'm a minority and I have to let them know what's going on, and it's my only defense.
"Justin, dear, maybe next time you should lighten up. As much as I love you, somethings are best left undescribed."
"No problem Britney honey."
Here comes my baby with my lunch. Now I'm not the only minority.
"ATTENTION"
What the fuck is that?
"What the fuck is that?"
Nick took the words right out of my head.
"I'D JUST LIKE TO LET EVERY ONE KNOW THAT THEY CAN PICK UP A COPY OF THE JEFFORSON HIGH GOSSIP AFTER SCHOOL IN THE FRONT LOBBY. THAT'S IT, THANKS"
"You don't think she's talking about what she told us the other day do you?"
Oh my god, I have to talk to her later on today. She can't be serious.
"No way, she don't have the guts."
Maybe Mandy's right, I don't think she is though. I just wanna hope that she is. But I still have to ask Summer.
Ring Ring Ring
Okay, that is so bad. Every one is way too excited to find out what is in that paper. Summer wouldn't talk to me though, so I think it might be bad. But at least Britney is waiting for me, she doesn't seem interested. I hope it isn't anything bad.
"So you ready to see what Summer has manufactured?"
"Yeah, I think, you?"
"Of course, anything that I have done isn't bad, so what if it comes out I kissed Christina, or that I strip when I get drunk. I mean, those things aren't bad, I'll still be popular in the end. I'll still be above her all the time."
Some how that is reassuring. I mean, it's true. No matter what we do, we will still be popular. If I can stay popular after I came out, they know that I'm gay. And I still get to be a popular person at all the parties, so this can't change it, can it?
"Let's go Justin, we'll go look at it and prove it."
"LET'S GO"
"What, what is it Howie?"
"Um, nothing, it's just the papers, they are stupid. AJ wants me to take you home, come on."
"Why are you acting so stupid Howie? All me and Justin wanna do is see the paper."
This could be bad, why won't he let us see it?
"Seriously Howie."
"Fine."
He seems defeated, which is a bad thing. Okay, here it is, nothing big, something about Mandy and her acne in middle school, not bad, something about kevin and his weight in elementary school. Okay, page three, something about Nick with a guy. Something about Nick and AJ making out last year at a party.....
What?
"Howie, what is this?"
"I warned you. He didn't want you to know Justin. He never meant it, you were visiting your mom. We were at Brian's, we were all drunk, Nick was horny, one thing led to another, AJ got really drunk. And, Nick ended up kissing him, AJ was too drunk to realize, and made out. As soon as they realized what they were doing they stopped. We didn't want you to know."
"Who all knew?"
"Just me, Brian, AJ and Nick. That's it, no one else, swear!"
"What a fucker!"
"Come on Just, I'll take you home."
"Thanks Brittney"
I don't think it's hit me yet. I mean, I'm not crying, and I know if hit me I'd be crying. I'm just pushing it off. I don't wanna cry in front of Britney, it's great of her to take me home and everything, so I don't wanna make her hug me and shit too. I can handle this at home, alone. It's all good.
"Wanna talk about it?"
I don't think I can handle it now, why did she say that?
"No, how, how could he do that to me? And not tell me."
"Oh, come on Justin. You know he didn't mean to hurt you, he loves you, you knwo that. He's just an asshole, forget about him. We'll go to the mall tomorrow, skip school, get new wardrobes. Then we'll find you a guy, and you can get over him real quick."
"Thanks Brit, but I don't wanna go to the mall. I'm not gonna miss school, everyone will know I'm upset. I'm not gonna be the pussy that couldn't handle it."
"Alright, just think about it."
Knock Knock Knock
"Justin, you have a friend here. You wanna talk to him?"
"Who is it?"
Why the fuck am I still crying? I am such a baby, I can handle this. So he cheated on me, it's no big deal, I'll find some one else. He's just my highschool boyfriend, I can live.
"It's Alex."
I wish I had told my dad what he did. At least then I wouldn't have been aksed if he could come in. My dad wouldn't understand though, as soon as he came home he bothered me and I managed to keep from crying. But that's cuz he would be disgusted if I cried in front of him. So I stayed strong, but now, now, I can't talk to him cuz I'm crying again. And if I tell him that I don't wanna talk to AJ then he'll know something is up. I need to work it out with him anyways, I guess.
"Yeah, send him in."
I'm gonna let him talk first, and I'm not gonna listen, then he'll just leave. Maybe I won't even have to look at him, that would be very helpful.
"So, uh, hi."
"That's it."
"I'm sorry Justin, I'm sorry. Okay, I went into that cafeteria thinking that their was nothing that bitch knew that could hurt any of us. She got us though, she got me and you. And I know she got me in the fucking heart, and I can tell that's where she got you. But I love you Justin. I always will, and I never, ever meant to hurt you."
"Why? Why Nick? Why ever?"
"I don't know, we were drunk. Nick is straight, he just wanted to try it I guess, and I was stupid. You were away, I was horny, it's no excuse, but I just, I imagined it was you. He's your height, he's got blue eyes, blond hair. I'm sorry, you didn't deserve it. You deserve the best, and it's not me. I know that, I know I can't give you what you want right now."
"You are so fucking stupid. You sit here and bullshit with me about what you did. Why did you do it? Not because you were drunk, that isn't a god damn answer. It's an excuse."
Where the fuck did that came from? When did I get the courage to tell off anyone, yet alone any of my friends? I usually just sit and put up with shit. But on the other hand, I did find out that my boyfriend is a lying, cheating bastard today, so I guess you can get some inner strength from that without realizing it.
"I know it's an excuse, and I'm sorry. I don't have a reason."
"What would you do if I let some guy just do shit to me?"
"I, I'd, I'd get pissed."
"Yeah, that's right, so why shouldn't I get pissed that you touched some other guy? Will you leave? Please, I don't wanna talk to you."
"Justin, I'll go, I love you, but first. For the first time since that night, I cried. I cried the night I did that, cuz I realized what a fucked up thing I had done. I cried today, I can't lose you Justin, just remember that, I'm not going to give you up anytime soon."
That was so sentimentel, I'm glad he left, cuz I just started to cry again. I hope he gets by my dad without being seen. Cuz if my dad saw him leave he'll probably question me about it, and then I'd break down in front him. Oh which reminds me, I guess I'm driving myself to school tomorrow for the first time in a long one.
Ring Ring Ring
"Is Summer there?"
Okay, so she exposed this big secret, for some reason, I feel like she is the only person I can talk to about this. After all, the friends I have kept this big huge secret about my boyfriend, so maybe she is the only person I can trust.
"This is Summer, who's this?"
"This is Justin, Justin Timberlake."
"Oh, um, hi."
"Yeah."
"I'm sorry about today Justin. I didn't want you to be hurt by it I wanted them to take it out of the paper. I didn't want you to know, I knew it would hurt you. You didn't deserve that, I was trying to hurt the rest of them."
"Thanks, seriously, I guess I needed to know all that about AJ. You never did like him did you? That's why you left my house early, right?"
"Maybe, yes, how could I look at him? You really are different Justin. You aren' t like any of the other popular kids. You actually have feelings, I mean, you realize that me and my fucked up table are people. And well, Britney Spears and Nick Carter don't give a fuck. And apparently neither does AJ."
"No, he came by just now. He told me he cried for the first time since that night. I don't know what to do."
"Do what you want to do Justin. You love him, it's obvious, and as twisted as it is, he loves you too. Although he did a bad job of showing it. I really did think I'd be hearing good things from you today. Especially you asking me for advice for something that I caused. You sure you wouldn't rather talk to Britney?"
"Britney isn't good at this. Her solution was to get a guy to fuck me. Sorry, I don't do fucks. But you, I know that you actually care. I see it in your eyes, you missed being popular. Not the actual premises of it, but the friends. You did like some of us."
"I still like you, and Joey, and Brian, and Lance is cool. But I could never be popular again. You on the other hand, would fit in perfect at my table. We have a fairy, we have a pimp, we have a gay couple, we have a manly gay, we could use a girly one."
"Thanks, thanks a lot. You really boost my spirits."
I'm laughing, I'm laughing on the phone with a girl I should hate. I know I've laughed at her before, but right now, I'm on the phone with a girl, a girl that exposed my boyfriend as a cheater. A girl that literally despises one of my bestfriends, and insults me on a comical bases daily, and I'm laughing. Because she really is funny, and she is really is cool. None of my friends would understand what I'm going through right now, and none of them would understand that I need some one to talk to.
"Okay, listen here Timberlake. Tomorrow, I'm gonna do something special for you. I'll surprise you during lunch. But uh, I gotta go. Sorry about the whole thing. And I'm sure it will work out, cuz, after all, you and AJ are good for each other. Just give him time to realize that you needed to hate him for a little bit. And he'll get over it."
"Thanks Summer, I needed this."
"No problem, peace and love."
"Bye."
That was weird. I am going to go to school tomorrow, and talk to her. Not any of my other friends, I'll go find her, and bug her about my surprise. Maybe I'll even sit at her table for a little bit in lunch. Although, I wanna make myself appear strong tomorrow, because I really need to realize that I can live through this. I don't need AJ for a few days, just me, myself, and a good amount of cleenex and I'll be perfectly fine.
Which reminds me, I need to get a shower, cuz I am going to look good, smell good, and be freshly done tomorrow to come off as dealing and coping with it. No one is going to get me down. Except AJ when I look at him during lunch, which will just kill me. Because he's not gonna buy my lunch, he's not gonna sit by me. He's not going to take me to school, or pick me up.
I really need to stop thinking about him or I'm gonna soak my house. But on the bright side, he left his collar here that one time I wore it, so I can wear it now and just think about him. But I'll think about good things, like when I finally let his ass off the hook for doing this to me. But right now, I need to shower, and to sleep.
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Okay, so it was short. I know, but if you wanted it on time I needed it to be. I've been so busy with work which has really sucked. That I haven't had much time for the story, but I succeeded in getting it out on time, right, it is Sunday, or Monday, I don't know when it will get posted, but I made it. Oh and enjoy.