Purgatory of Syn 8
8
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You had me at "Liquor"
"Don't be scared," she told me, doing a slow intimidating walk as though really wanting me to be afraid of her.
"What do you want?" I asked her.
She didn't smile or look angry. She just puckered up her lips as though ready to whistle. She didn't whistle though. The fog had engulfed her and I as though we had been left alone in the world. I could hear the lake not too far from us.
"We made a deal. I'd bring you back Sampson and you would help me.'
"You changed Sampson."
"Do you really believe that I did?"
I thought about it for a minute. No...the signs were there all along with Sampson. She hadn't changed him. I turned around. I wished she had though. It would probably hurt less. It all would probably hurt less.
"You shouldn't have brought him back," I say.
I feel like crying, I can almost feel the tears at the back of my eye sockets, but I refuse to let them come out.
"You're upset aren't you?" she asked me, "He is just like the rest of them. The rest of all those other people. I called you Syn, because we are a rare race. I'm nobody! Who are you? Are you nobody too? Then there's a pair of us---don't tell! They'd banish us you know..."
"Dickinson. You are reciting Dickinson?"
I meant to find it funny. I even turned to smile. It made me feel better. It was one of my favorite poems.
"You now know how it feels to have your heartbroken," she explained to me, "Take that hurt. Don't lose it. It can be useful. You can change the world with your hurt. The Barons...they represent the `somebody' of the world. Me and you are different. They hurt us. It's time we hurt them too..."
A grudge. I could hear the anger in her voice when she said the name of Baron. I could tell how pissed off she really was.
"Are you the one responsible for making these boys disappear?" I ask her.
She looks at me. Her eyes don't hold any answer to my question.
"Syn! Syn!"
Fuck. I can tell it's Ty. I could see the witch's eyes light up, almost like a cat in the moonlight. Tini started to breath hard, losing her mysterious lady like elegance. No...she was just plain pissed now.
"It's a Baron...I can tell that tone anywhere," she stated.
"Don't do anything to him."
The way I said it was a command. The idea of her doing something to Ty scared me. It pissed me off. I didn't want anything to happen to him...
She started to laugh.
"No I wouldn't...you'll be the one to help me."
"How am I supposed to help you?"
"I can see it in your eyes. I can see it in your hands..." she said grabbing onto me, "You are already helping me. Just remember. You are nobody...just like me. Let's be nobody together."
"I'm not like you though," I tell her, "I'm not..."
"Syn!"
I turned to see Ty standing behind me. He grabbed me and hugged me as though I was a scared little kid. He wasn't alone. Jules and Monte were with him.
"Who were you talking to?" Ty asked.
I turned around. Madame Tini had disappeared into thin air. The fog wasn't as heavy as it was before. It was slowly fading away. I could clearly see Ty and Monte and even Jules.
"He was talking to the witch, that's who, the witch was here!" Jules cried out.
He had run and called for help. He looked scared out of his wits. For some reason though, I know I should have been scared. I didn't understand this woman. It was normal to be afraid of what I didn't understand.
Slowly however the fear was leaving and I was only left in thought. What was this about?
We had stopped our search after looking for a while longer. No trace of Tony was in sight. I didn't speak the whole while. I could see Ty's eyes stuck on me, as though trying to figure me out. All I knew was that was one pissed off old lady and things were going to come to head...real soon.
The old lady's words haunted me.
For the first time in a month and a half, Sampson wasn't the only thing on my mind. Now it was Madame Tini's words as well.
I was already helping her? How?
What was I doing?
I found myself walking to the PE class the next day with only that on my mind. It was open to all. Our gym teacher was a short little midget man with the thickest glasses that probably had never played a sport in his life. He really didn't care what we did. Jules of course was sitting on the sideline, watching Juboo and playing with his nails. I would usually be right next to him, daydreaming about Sampson, but today I went out with the boys.
Monte and Ty were doing lifts on a bar in the corner of the relatively small gym. Ty smiled at me as I approached, his eyes burning into me like they usually did.
"Hey."
"Hi."
"Jules still tripping about that Madame Tini?"
I shrugged. I didn't want to talk to him about her. If only he knew the hate that she had for his entire family, he would want to back off a little.
Monte laughed, "You guys are so funny. Witches aren't logical. What are we, in the 2nd grade?"
Ty rolled his eyes, "Monte, they both saw her...people aren't making up these stories about her."
"Well I'm a bit crazy," I said and crossed my arms, "It's not like she was real. I have a wild imagination. I'm waiting for a unicorn to run across the room any second now."
Monte found this hilarious and started to laugh, while Ty just looked at me silently as though criticizing me. I could tell he didn't believe me. He could honestly believe what he wanted to believe. Honestly, I didn't even know what to believe any longer. Magic, witches, ancient grudges. It seemed a little too much.
"Teach me how to do a lift, Ty," I said, trying to take his mind off of the whole witch thing.
"It's easy, just grab onto...how about I lift you."
How about he do that? I saw Ty come up from behind me as I took my position reaching up for the top bar. He put his hands around my waist. I could feel his breath against the back of my neck. He was so fucking sexy. How the hell could he just allow himself to be a virgin and yet be this fucking sexy?
He had to be the sexiest virgin alive.
"You ready?" he asked me, his breath hitting the back of my neck.
At that moment with Ty pressed up against me, I felt like I wasn't, which is why I pretended to take a deep breath and prolong the moment. Wait...what was I doing? This was Ty.
"Yeah, I'm ready," I stated.
He grabbed me by my waist and thrusted me up. My hand slipped off the bar however and I came crashing down. I thought he was going to catch me but he seemed surprised that my hand had slipped and we both came crashing down together.
I was over him. My head over his head. I felt the surge of pain in my leg from where I landed.
"Hey are you ok?" a voice said to me and walked over. The voice was Juboo.
It was weird that he had come all the way across the room. I watched as he helped me up on my feet. He ONLY helped me up on my feet. Ty remained on the floor until Monte came over to help him up.
"No I'm not..." I complain, trying to bend over and feel my ankle.
"You ok, boo!" I could hear Jules call as he ran over. It was obvious why he was running over. Juboo was standing right here of course.
"I'll take him to the nurse," Ty offered.
"No, I'll take him," Juboo said, turning to give Ty a look that I couldn't really see but then he added something that seemed a little offensive, "It's obvious you can't hold his weight."
Ty and Monte exchanged looks. It was obvious Juboo just took a jab at him. The look on Ty's face, I had to admit, was kind of hilarious. He look like an offended kid or something who was thinking about a comeback but none was coming to mind.
"I'm not going to the Vintage Nurse anyway," I stated, "No thanks. I don't want the same treatment she gave to Adam and Eve."
I managed to make Juboo crack a smile, "Come over to the bench, I'll rub it out. It's probably just a little cramp."
"Thank you so much for helping my friend..." I head Jules start.
Obviously Juboo hadn't heard Jules though because he completely ignored him as he walked me over to the bench. Juboo sat me down on the bench and he actually began to rub my leg... in front of everyone.
I could see Wilson and his crew giving me the hater eye as they went on with a game of basketball from across the gym.
"You're boy is weak as hell," Juboo stated as he started to rub down my leg, "You know? He should have easily caught you."
"He didn't expect my hand to slip off the bar."
"Well what's the point of spotting you if he isn't paying attention to you," Juboo asked and rolled his eyes, "I was paying more attention to you then he was."
"Why?"
"I don't know...I pay attention to you a lot," he stated and licked his lips.
He was flirting with me again. I wondered if anyone noticed. My face circled the room. Yeah, a couple people were paying attention to us. Ty and Jules of course were two of them. Jules just seemed jealous while Ty seemed pissed at Juboo for saying that embarrassing comment.
Great, I realized Ty and Jules walking over our way. They were talking. I didn't know what they were talking about but it was obvious it had something to do with Juboo and I.
"Great...here comes your loser friends, why do you hang with those cats?" he asked me, "Fairy bright and the damn prinicipal's son? You are a bad boy. Yet you hang with those guys..."
"I'm a loser too," I smiled.
I didn't mind being called one. He smiled too. I didn't like that. All of a sudden he was amused by the idea of being a loser when just a second ago he was putting them down.
"I guess you taught me. Don't look down on someone...unless you're giving them head..." he said and smiled...
He licked his lips again and kept rubbing my ankle, this time more slowly as Jules and Ty approached. I couldn't help it, by the time they got to the bench, I was almost hypnotized in Juboo's touch.
"Syn, I'm sorry I didn't catch you," Ty started, "Syn...Syn are you listening?"
I snapped back into reality, "Yeah, oh damn Ty. It's cool. It was just an accident right?"
Jules stretched out his hand to Juboo, "Hiya...I'm Jules...I don't think we formally, you know, met yet..."
Juboo didn't take either of his hands off my ankle. He just gave Jules a head nod. I would have felt bad, but Jules needed to stop being so damn thirsty. It just wasn't a good look. He just looked...desperate.
"I guess you're too good to tell Jules your name?" Ty said, causing this ton of tension in the air all of a sudden.
"I think he knows it. Am I wrong?" Juboo looked over at Jules.
Jules just seemed so happy that Juboo was finally addressing him that a little elf-like smile spread across his face as he started at Juboo's oversexy face.
"Of course I know your name, I love it too. It's so...different," Jules said, "Just like you. You seem like a lot of fun. Maybe can hang out..."
"Yeah, good idea," Juboo stated.
"What?" I asked.
I was more then surprised. My face showed it. Did Juboo just agree to go on a date with Jules? I could see Jules face light up. Perhaps I shouldn't have been so surprised.
"We all can go do something," Juboo offered and smiled at me, "I got some liquor in my suitcase. I'll have a little get together in my room tonight. You all are invited...Syn you going to come right?"
I nodded. Why the hell not?
"You had me at Liquor," I said and smiled.
He walked away giving me this long look and then waved as he went to finish playing basketball. I rolled my ankle around surprised at how much better it felt.
Jules looked over at us with this happy look, "Did you guys see how he stared at me?"
_______________________________________________________________________
There was a knock on my door in the evening. Etienne looked at me and I looked at him. It was obvious it was for me. It was always for me. Etienne never received any type of visitors.
Still my bed sounded so comfortable. I wasn't going to get out of it.
"Aren't you going to get the door?" Etienne asked, "It's for you."
He was studying. I could tell that the knock had disturbed him as he stuck his head out of his book from his desk and looked over at me.
"Nope."
"Get the door...it's disturbing me. I'm reading."
"It's not bothering me. Hm...I don't even hear anything."
"What, yes you did? It was loud as day. Why do I always have to get the door?" Etienne complained and whined, "It's always for you and I ALWAYS have to get it."
He was right.
"Sucks doesn't it?"
"Get the door, Syn. Seriously."
"It's really not bothering me. If its bothering you so much why don't you get it?" I ask him, "Trust me. I can go to sleep right now and you'll be the one upset that you have to study with knocking. So either you can try to be a tough ass or you can suck it up and go get the door. Because I am a real tough ass. I'm such a tough ass that I am a steel anus..."
"Are you serious?"
"Goodnight," I said and closed my eyes.
"I hate you," he stated and got up off the bed, huffing and puffing.
A smile spread across my face. He always gave in.
"You'll thank me for this one day, you need the exercise."
He walked back into the room. Obviously there was no one at the door. He threw something on my bed and grunted loudly as he returned to his desk.
"Big letters, For Syn written all over it," he stated, "I hate you."
I was beginning to believe it as much as he said it. I loved the idea of him hating me. As I looked on the bed I opened the letter that was sitting there. It was sealed. I cracked the seal. Someone had knocked on my door, left a letter and ran.
It was barely a letter.
It was more like a note. It was a simple, dry note that read.
"And I Think I love You. I don't know why."
It wasn't signed, but the author was obvious. It was from Juboo. I took a deep breath. Love...I hated the word.
How could he love me...already?
I didn't get it. He didn't even know me. I remember how long it took for me to love Sampson. It took forever. It took forever for him to admit that he loved me and wanted to be with me.
What about Jules? How would he feel that the guy he had been obsessing over loved someone else?
My head hurt by the time the little get-together was coming around. We all ended up at Juboo's room. I had spent all this time thinking about how I was going to let Juboo down. Love was no longer in my vocabulary.
I dressed in a normal outfit. It was the first time I was really seeing people not in uniform or pajamas or something. Everyone seemed to have this real different style. I spotted Juboo, but he didn't see me. He was in one of the rooms next to his, drinking with a few other guys and laughing about something weird. A party with no girls...any other gay guy would have been enthralled. I was sure Jules was. I didn't see him. He was probably still getting ready.
"Hey," Ty's voice called me.
He was standing in the hallway with a drink in his hand. As I walked over he handed it to me and I took a sip. He already looked a little tipsy himself, just by how his eyes were hanging a little low. They were real bedroom-ish. He had on a fitted shirt and a hat. I never thought Ty had style. He just didn't come across like that to me, but he was stylish. His fitted clothes fitted just right, dressing almost like a celebrity...slightly looking like one even in his demeanor. If girls were here, they'd probably be all over him.
"Monte and Jules not here?"
"No...not yet."
"Good."
I sighed aloud and took a drink. I looked over to the room where Juboo was. What the hell had I gotten myself into?
He grabbed me by my arm and turned me around, "What's the matter Syn? I could already tell something is bothering you."
I smiled, "I'm amused you think you can read me like that. I'm not this easy. You were lucky this time though. I got a letter today."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah...a love letter. It was from Juboo, you know the guy that Jules is all into. Like Jules is probably going to kill me if he knew..."
I stopped talking. I stopped talking because I felt like I was talking to myself. I stopped talking because Ty was giving me this look that said he was more shocked than ever. His mouth had even dropped open.
"You're joking," was what came out of his mouth.
"No. I'm serious."
"No for real. You can't tell Jules."
"Jules is like in love with that boy Syn."
"That's exactly why you can't tell him," I said crossing my arms and trying to break down the almost disgusted look that Ty had on his face.
"This is some bullshit."
He looked irritated. His face wasn't the same warm look that I was used to. He had on a expression that was classical annoyance in its purest form. If he was reacting like this, I could only imagine Jules reaction. I wasn't afraid of it, mind you. I just didn't have the time or energy to shut down a drama queen any time soon.
"He's been flirting with me," I explained.
"And you have been flirting back."
"What the hell?"
"Why would he keep flirting with you if you weren't flirting back?" Ty asked me, "Do you know Jules has liked that boy since we got to this school? Why would you do this to him?"
"Oh god, is this one of your damn love arguments again, please let me know so I can start pretending to listen now..."
"See, Syn you are so...stupid. You don't care about anyone but yourself do you?" he asked me.
"Jesus Christ..."
I rolled my eyes and walked away. I had to get something to drink if I was going to listen to Ty whine all night. He was way too attractive to be such a sap. I could feel his eyes burning on my back as I walked away.
I hadn't expected him to actually follow me and turn me around.
He pointed a finger in my face, "You are the only one that I'll let walk away from me when I'm being serious. I would have smashed the head of anyone else...but quit pushing my buttons...Syn, seriously."
He couldn't even keep his finger straight. He was loud. A couple of other guys had turned around to see if we were about to fight or something. All of a sudden I realized the only reason I hadn't smelled liquor on his breath was because he had gum.
He was drunk...
"You're wasted? Aren't you?"
He looked me up and down, guilty as charged.
"Why don't you fucking listen to me for a second?" he said and all of a sudden a tear ran down his face, "You are always fucking with love...why Syn? Why don't you just let that shit be!"
He pounded his fist hard into the wall. I thought he was about to bleed for a second, but he didn't, he just kicked the wall after that. What the fuck? He definitely was an emotional drunk.
I should have been embarrassed, but hell I wasn't. I'd had a lot more embarrassing stuff happen to me in my life then someone being drunk.
Ty started bawling in tears saying all this stuff that I didn't understand. I guess he was talking about his past and memories of stuff. Damn, how had he gotten drunk before people even arrived at the party?
That was when non other then Juboo walked over accompanied by Wesley and the rest of his little group, "What's the problem?"
My mouth was opening. Truth was I didn't know what was happening. I loved drunk moments. I was just waiting for Ty to spill his guts in every way possible. It was such an interesting thing. The idea of someone not being in their right mind made me so amused, because I was never in my right mind.
"Just leave him alone, he'll wear himself out. They always do."
"Why the fuck don't you mind your fucking business?" Ty said to Juboo.
I couldn't help but to bust out laughing. It was hilarious. That was when Wesley took a step forward.
"You want me to knock your ass again playboy?"
Juboo held him back, "It's my party kid, take that shit somewhere else."
"Why'd you even invite these losers Juboo?" Wesley asked.
I was about to say something to Wesley, but Ty seemed like the Iron Man or something. It must have been the liquid courage, because he ran up into Wesley's face faster then I'd seen anyone run into anyone's face. I thought he was about to hit him immediately but he just stood there staring him down, until Wesley took a step back.
I would have been intimidated too. Ty looked a little out of himself.
That was when I saw Jules and Monte. Jules grabbed Ty by his collar and pulled him back, "Come on Ty, it's not worth it."
Wesley called out turning his back, "Yeah, why don't you listen to your faggot ass friend and get the fuck out of here. You tooth-fairy fuckers..."
All of a sudden I knew what was going to happen. I should have stopped it, but I couldn't. Everyone was real tense and real serious except for me. I was snickering so hard that I thought I was going to piss my pants.
Ty started out with, "Fag? Ask Juboo here about that shit. Jules loves him. Jules fucking loves him and he doesn't even know Jules exists..."
Jules mouth dropped open. He couldn't believe that Ty had just let out his secret to all these guys watching his drunkenness.
"Ty..." Monte started trying to stop him.
All the dudes had on this disgusted face. My mouth dropped but I still couldn't stop but smile. This was SO embarrassing. I felt like I wanted to just take Ty away but god knows what else was going to come out of that mouth of his.
Did this make me a bad person that I was enjoying this a little?
"No...Juboo doesn't even see Jules does he? He is too stuck on Syn."
Juboo started to shake his head violently at the accusation, "I am not a fag...what the hell..."
Ty kept going...like he was letting out the last sins from Pandora's box, "Yes you are...you been flirting with him! Don't fucking deny it. But you won't fucking get him. Cause Syn is mine...I love Syn."