The following story is true. It's about how I came to the realization that I'm gay. If you have a problem with reading about man on man sex or sex in public then i strongly suggest you not read this. If you are under 18 then this is not legal for you to read at all. The names have been changed but that's it. I haven't changed anything else. Those that live near me feel free to email me to set up a hookup.
Queer and Proud By: Jim Mason
I've been gay since birth. I realize this now. I won't lie to you though. I have had sex with several women. I, however, keep going back to men. At first, I thought it was a sexual perversion and something that I really shouldn't be doing. It took a life changing event for me to finally realize what I really am.
I became interested in sex at a very young age. I started jacking off when i was 9 years old. I had been playing with my dick prior to that but 9 years old was when i had my first orgasm. I was also 9 years old when I sucked my first dick.
I was over at a friend's house. We were playing in his sprinkler while his parents were gone. At one point my swimming shorts fell off. Dan started rubbing my naked cock right there in his back yard. He took off his clothes as well and we layed in the back yard and sucked each other's dicks. We would continuing to do this about once a week or so all summer. We just sorta abruptly stopped it.
Next would be Sean. I was 11 years old. We went to school together and he lived up the road from me in a close-by neighborhood. He stayed over at my house alot and we talked about girls alot. After a few weeks we started to jack off in the dark in my bed together. Sometimes we would briefly stroke each other. I do have to say that I loved feeling his cock in the dark. It was dirty and I just new that not alot of ppl did it.
One night we were jacking each other off and he went down on me. God it felt good. It didn't last very long that night. He sucked my dick for a few minutes then I sucked him for a few minutes. Afterwards, he asked if what we did was ok. I told him that i'm totally ok with it if he is. He admitted that he had been wanting to go down on me for a couple weeks but wasn't sure if it was cool or not.
That would be the start of my first gay relationship. We weren't out to anyone but we had already decided to be boyfriends. I would go to his house after school and we would lay in his bed naked and make out till my mom picked me up. We didn't get into any heavy oral in fear that his mom would walk in. Never mind the fact that we were in bed together totally naked. We stayed the night at my house every weekend. We would make out in my room all night until bedtime. After the lights went out we would get naked and suck each other off until we wanted to go to bed. We would lay together in bed when we slept. I liked the feeling of his dick between my butt cheeks. I woke up more than a few times to him grinding me. We never had anal sex while we were awake but twice. Several times in the middle of the night, I would wake up to him humping me and his dick was about halfway inside me.
I never knew if he was "sleep fucking" me or if he was just waiting till i was asleep. It felt good either way. Over the summer after 7th grade he had to move away because his dad got a different job. We had anal sex that night before bed. He wouldn't come back to henderson until we were both 17. I had almost forgotten about our escapades. He called me out of the blue and said that he was moving back into town.
He said, "So, you dating anyone?"
I said, "Yeah, I've been with a couple girls since last time you were here."
He said, "Getting any pussy?"
I said, "Of course."
He said, "You remember what we used to do back in 7th grade?"
I said, "Well, yeah."
He said, "What did you think about that?"
I said, "I liked it. You were my first and only boyfriend."
He said, "Yeah, that was pretty cool."
I said, "Nobody's home right now if you wanna come over."
He said, "What did you wanna do?"
I said, "A little truth or dare."
He said, "You still into that?"
I said, "I haven't sucked any other guys dicks, if that's what you mean." (I actually lied. I had a boyfriend during my most of my sophomore year of highschool. We were actually semi-public with it. We went to homecoming together, made out at the dance and everyone knew we got a hotel room afterwards.)
He said, "I'll be over in 15 minutes."
He was over about 20 minutes later. He walked in the door and we started to make out. We slowly walked back to my room, making out the whole way. We layed on the bed fully clothed. We started rubbing each other's cocks through our jeans as we kissed.
We stood up and undressed each other while we made out. As soon as i had his pants off I hit the floor and started sucking his dick. It was much bigger than what i remember in 7th grade. Back then he was about 3 inches long. He was now about 8 inches long. We ended up in a 69 and we sucked each other's dicks for a good 20 minutes. I would break it off. I got on top of him and slid his dick into my pussy.
We fucked in my bedroom all that afternoon.I let him cum in my pussy and I came all over his cock and stomach. We were making out and holding each other afterwards. I felt the need to reveal a truth to him.
I said, "I wanted to tell you something in person, Sean."
He said, "What's that?"
I said, "I think if you hadn't moved away I would probably be gay right now."
He said, "Really?"
I said, "Well yeah. We sucked each other's dicks every weekend for over a year."
He said, "You wanna know something?"
I said, "Of course."
He said, "I've thought about you every day I was gone. I told my friends that I had to move away from my boyfriend in henderson."
I said, "That's cool man, but I think we would probably had stayed boyfriends."
We had sex about 2 weeks later and I never saw him again. I wouldn't have another gay encounter until after highschool.
I was 18 when I started working at Best Buy in Evansville. I started off at the service desk but moved to the warehouse about 4 months after I started. My supervisor had been trying to get me to go to bed with him on several occasions and he was public about it half the time. The other half he would ask me to go home with him and go to bed with him when it was just him and me. I always told him no that I was straight. The truth was that I just didn't want people to know that I was into guys. That and it was the fact that I was in serious denial about my sexuality.
Then one summer night I would be somewhat forced to act on my desires. Rob and I were closing together and we had the radio on. We had heard that my only means of getting home was blocked for the evening. Well, there was another way for me to get home but I would have to take another 2 hours to get home.
Rob said, "Why don't you just come home with me?"
I thought about it for a couple seconds then said, "Ok, just let me call home and tell them."
I called mom and told her the situation and that I was gonna be at rob's house. After we were done closing, I followed rob to his house. We got to his house and we sat up a while. He turned on Top Gun and we started watching it.
About 20 minutes into the movie he said, "Can I do something?"
I said, "Sure thing."
He got up and walked up to me. He unzipped my jeans and unbuttoned them. I stood up and pulled them off for him. I sat back down and he started sucking my dick. It was literally the best blowjob I had ever had.
He sucked my dick for about 20 minutes. He would go very slow so I wouldn't cum. I then said, "Can we continue this in bed together?"
He said, "I wasn't gonna rush things."
We both stood up and went to the bedroom. I finished undressing and got on his waterbed. He changed in his bathroom. He came out and I could see his big dick hanging between his legs. He was about 9 inches long. He got in bed with me and started making out. I then went down on him. I couldn't deep throat him but I did manage about half of his beautiful cock.
After about 10 minutes of me sucking his dick, he said, "I want you baby."
I said, "You wanna fuck my pussy?"
He grinned and said, "You are such a naughty girl."
I got on all fours but rested on my arms. He got out some ky-jelly and rubbed it on his cock and fingered my pussy with it. He then pressed his cock to my pussy and pushed it in. He slowly eased it in until his balls were resting on my ass. He then grabbed my hips and slowly started fucking me. Each time he would push his dick in he would thrust it all the way in. I could feel his big dick on my prostate. I had an erection from the stimulation. After about 15 minutes he layed back on his back. I got up on top of him and put his dick back where it needed to be.
It took him another 15 minutes before he would cum. My dick was hard and he was enjoying himself so i let him just cum in my pussy. He came hard and kept fucking me. I leaned back and started jacking off while he fucked me. We came together on his second orgasm. I shot my load up into the air and down all over my dick and balls.
I don't even remember cleaning up. We fell asleep with him holding me. I still had cum all over my cock and cum leaking out of my pussy. We didn't have to be into work again until noon. We woke up at about 10 am and had a quicky again before having to get ready.
What would happen at work would be shocking to me. We walked into work and Rob's best friend was already back in the warehouse taking inventory.
He said, "So what did you guys do last night?"
I said, "Rob only has one bed. What do you think happened?"
He said, "I meant the sales figures...."
I said, "Oh well. I enjoyed myself."
Rob and I didn't have sex again after that night. I wanted to and he wanted to, but it just never happened. He had a roommate move in soon after. Not a sexual roommate. It was someone that he was old friends with that needed a place to stay. About the only thing we did was he would rub my dick when we got a spare moment alone back in the warehouse.
I didn't have any other gay experiences after that for a long time. I got married in my early 20's. I had sex with my wife for nearly 6 months straight w/o missing a day. We had been married a year and I started to download porn. Wasn't anything wrong in the bedroom or anything. I just thought it would be something different. We could watch it before we had sex. I downloaded all kinds of porn. Most of them were full length movies. I had a large collection of lesbian, straight and even gay porn.
I had told my wife about all my sexual encounters with men and she was ok with it. She new that I still found men attractive. She asked me once if I would ever sleep with a man again. I said, "if i had the opportunity and you didn't care...I sure would."
That opportunity would present itself soon after. She was friends with a couple that had been swinging on an occasion or 2. From what I had been told they had a few threesomes AFTER getting married. They had a 2nd man twice and a 2nd woman twice.
One night we were all casually drinking and watching movies. All of us were horny but nobody wanted to leave the room. My wife's friend decided to just pull the couch out into a bed. We all got undressed and got in bed. Karen and I were making out and i was playing with her pussy. While we were making out, someone started sucking my dick. It wasn't Amber. It was her husband Darren. I looked over and Amber was sucking Darren's dick and Darren was sucking my dick. I told Karen to hold on a sec. I held Darren's head and pulled him up to me. Darren and I started making out. We were fondling each other while we kissed.
I flip-flopped and started sucking Darren's dick. Soon we were 69ing. I had totally forgotten about Karen. Darren slowly sucked me to an orgasm. I didn't want to leave him hanging so I bent over the bed and told him to have his way with me. He got off the bed and plunged his dick into my pussy. It took Darren about 20 minutes to cum and he was nice enough to play with my cock while he fucked me.
Darren and I would turn that first night into several nights alone together. Sometimes it would be a quick blowjob while the girls were out getting dinner. Sometimes we would go all the way.
Those encounters I had with Darren would put a spark between my legs. I was working in evansville at the time. I would stop by an adult bookstore about once or twice a week. This particular bookstore had several booths that you could go in. They played an assortment of pornos and each one had a 2way window connecting you to someone else on the other side. You just press a button and they do the same and you can watch each other.
You aren't supposed to have more than one person to a booth but nobody ever followed that rule. The way I started it, I would get in my booth, pull my jeans down and start playing with myself. I would keep my button pushed so whoever was on the other side would see me automatically when they pushed theirs. We would watch each other jack off until someone got enough nerve to invite the other over. We would suck each other off and then both would leave.
I got more daring the more I went into the bookstore. About a month later, I would go to a corner that didn't have heavy traffic. I would strip completely naked and leave my booth door wide open. A guy would come by and watch me openly play with myself. If they were interested they would just walk in and shut the door behind them. We would make out and suck each other then leave once we were done. I got even more daring one time. I was naked in my booth playing with myself. A cute mid-20 y/o guy was watching me. I noticed he started to rub his dick through his jeans while watching me. I walked out into the open completely naked. I pressed myself to him and kissed him. I reached into his jeans and started fondling his cock.
Well, for one reason or another karen and I would get divorced. It had nothing to do with my sexual interests. She just didn't want to be married anymore. I honestly didn't want to deal with another woman. Anyway, about a month or so before we called it quits, I had a post in a yahoo group for gay/bi men in the henderson, ky area. The first real person to respond to it would be someone that I never thought would be gay. I honestly didn't want to deal with another woman. I wanted to find someone that just wanted sex and lots of it. I would find 2 different guys.
I found a guy that I went to school with. He's the absolute best dick sucker i've ever been with. We've had sex 3 or 4 times with me on top. He's not much of a top guy. I also found an older guy. He's the ex husband of someone I used to know.
Both are perfect. I can just call them up and ask if i can come over. I go over there and we have a couple hours of fun and then go back to our regular lives. It's funny how the roles reverse though. I've been a bottom guy most of my gay life. I'm a bottom for the older guy. He sure does enjoy being on top of me. The younger guy is more of a bottom. It doesn't happen every time we are together though. Basically just when there's plenty of lube and lots of stimulation prior to it.
I haven't come out of the closet to anyone other than myself and the men i'm with. I kind of prefer it that way at the moment. I do know that I'm 85 percent gay though. I can watch porno's with women in them but you get me naked with a man and my dick gets rock hard in an instant.
If you liked my story let me know. If you are in or around henderson, ky and wanna know more write me and we can chat.