Rant for Today: You guys keep amazing me with your support. I never imagined anyone would actually like this story. Now, several have been naming my songs... but only a couple have named both so far. Here's another one if anyone can place the name. "At the end of the world, or the last thing I see, you are never comin' home never comin' home, could I? Should I? And all the things that you never ever told me... and all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me... could I? Should I? And all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me... and all the ghosts that are never gonna..." Name it.
Some of you have expressed concern about the drug usage in my story. I apologize if this offends you in any way, but if that is the case, you should get your nose out of this story now. This is not a story which will be made tame for the masses; there will be graphic scenes in which I touch upon the parts of human nature held most intolerable by our society. Not for the squeamish, or faint of heart. Also, I would like to point out something. Kindly notice that from now on, since some expressed a difficulty of separating the author's ramblings from the main character's narration, there will be a line indicating the start of the narration or story. Thank you, and enjoy. Before, though, it's been a while, eh? Sorry guys. Things happen. Life sucks. I hate my world. This chapter is dedicated to my love-puppy, Krys. But now... on with the show. ***********************************************************************
The burger burned. Damn. I flicked the spatula over and flung that piece of meat in the garbage. Work was going very, very slowly. I stared at the clock and waited until I could leave. My boss had left me in charge of the grill, and I had less than fifteen minutes left until closing time. Thank goodness. I'd been sneaking smoke breaks all day, with excuses like taking out the garbage, or throwing away boxes.
Well, I didn't exactly hate working there. I kind of liked it, actually. All in all, Debbie's was a nice place to work in a small town like Columbia. I figure I need money, and this is the way to get it. Other than stealing, of course, which I don't do, unless it's from someone I think deserves it. Ya know, all Robin Hood style.
Cute boys came and went, and I mentally undressed them, and fantasies involving cowboy hats, tight jeans, and lots and lots of hot naked guys played through my mind. I'm a teenager, okay? What do you expect?
I need a car. That was out of nowhere, you say? Once again, TEENAGER! Jesus, you'd think you guys would realize who you're talking to after a while. Anyway, I need a car. I'd been looking for one, but had no luck recently in finding something affordable, and with my mother, it's anyone's guess as to when I'll get one. I still worked, stashed money, and saved in expectancy though.
An hour later, I was at home, in my room, lying on the bed. I looked at my room, and decided that it needed serious rearranging, but that would come later. Right now, I had to sort through all of my thoughts. I have things to do. Lots and lots of things to do, in fact. School was getting closer, and things were really starting to annoy me. I couldn't stand that damn town, it was horrible. All of the rednecks and stupid people, I just can't take it any more.
But Jonathan makes it a lot easier. Love is a strange thing. I still don't pretend to completely understand it. All I know is that the world would end if I couldn't kiss him again. No. I'm serious. My world would absolutely cease to exist, my sanity would be shattered, and I wouldn't know what to do if I could never hold him in my arms again, or have him say he loves me. He says it in such a cute way, and his lips spread into a grin that makes me want to melt into his arms.
I sighed and put my head on the pillow, lying on my stomach. I felt a heat in my groin, and groaned, feeling that familiar tension building. My heart quickened, and it seemed as if my mouth was watering twice as much as before. I pressed and ground my crotch against the bed, and felt my hardness trapped between my stomach and the fabric of my clothes and sheets. My shirt slid up, and my pants rode dangerously low on my hips. The twin mounds of muscle writhed deliciously as my cock pressed into the fabric, and I drew in a sharp breath. The top of my ass was slowly exposed, and I felt the gently moving air against my skin.
Oh, this was nice. I closed my eyes and thought of Jonathan. I thought of the way his hips press against his pants, and I can feel the bones there if I press myself close enough. I thought about the way he tilts his head when he sleeps. Somehow my hand found its way downward, wrapping around and squeezing, then stroking as I thought about the way Jonathan felt that night on my birthday pressing into me.
Seconds later, I panted, shook, and squirmed as I emptied myself onto the bed below me. My eyes refused to open, and my muscles trembled with ecstatic release.
I sighed, and turned over to think. I do this a lot, you know. I'll just sit, lay, whatever, and think for a long time, going over my life, and thinking about what I should do to make it easier, better, or just smoother. Sometimes it works. It's the best I know to do.
Right now, I thought of Jonathan. I thought about what school would be like, and whether or not he would want to be open about our relationship. I won't lie; it hurt to think that maybe he might not want to be associated with me that way in public. I didn't care who knew about us. I loved him, and that was all that mattered to me.
My eyes closed in the sweet bliss of the afterglow. I slowly came to my senses and got up, cleaned up, dressed, then headed for the living room. My mother and I are on shaky ground. We're not quite sure what to do about each other. You see, she thinks that she's done something wrong along the way raising me, that something she's done has been disastrous to my development. I think she's wrong, that I'm fine, and she's done a good job, though I do have my flaws.
I passed by her, and thought, then turned around and gave her a hug. It felt really good to establish that contact with her, you know? It was like we had forgotten our parts in life, and now we knew again. This may not mean much to you, but to me, it means a lot. She's all I have, she's my anchor, she's my mom. I mean, who else is there to turn to when things get rough? Exactly.
So after that wonderful moment when nothing was said but all was understood, I stepped outside, and pulled out my cell from my pocket. My friend Sam had wanted me to go with her to the creek for a while, and I figured today was a really good day. I still had my black fingernails and dark looks, but you know that doesn't mean that I'm not a happy person on the inside.
"Hey sexy!" I said with a wide grin. Samantha and I have a unique relationship.
"Hey sexier! You gonna come with us to the creek?" She asked. Samantha was a big girl, but she was the funniest, most hilarious, caring, sweet, awesome person you could ever hope to meet. If I were straight, I would've married her. That's how good of a friend she is.
"Yep, me and Jonathan are gonna come, okay? Who all else is coming with us? Are we all gonna fit in the car?" I asked her.
"Yeah, it'll be tight, but we'll make it work! Me, you, Jonathan, Destiny, Jason, Heather, and maybe some other people. I'm at your driveway, come on, and don't forget your swimsuit!" She yelled into the phone, then hung up.
I ran back inside to grab my trunks, and by the time I'd done that, Sam had pulled into the drive. I hopped into the car, waving at my mom and the kids, and we pulled out. Samantha is an insane driver. No, you don't understand me. This girl does 110 mph or better on Mississippi backroads. She's a good driver now, don't get me wrong, but she'll scare the hell out of you. I always wear my seat belt.
Samantha always had her car rigged somehow. This time it was the motor fan. The switch was sitting on the dash to turn it on or off. We turned towards Jonathan's as Destiny pinched Jason's (Jason is Destiny's boyfriend) ass, causing him to jump and almost land in my lap. We were all scantily clad; Heather, Samantha, and Destiny were all in bikinis, and me and Jason had on our swim trunks.
Dust flew into the air as Samantha skidded into Jonathan's driveway. He came running out with nothing on but his swim shorts. I scooted over, but it wasn't enough room for Jonathan to get in the car.
"Get out, you can sit in my lap!" he said triumphantly, as if he'd just solved a riddle. I laughed and got out, then sat right on his lap when he sat in the seat. It felt so right sitting there with Jonathan's arms around me, our skin pressed together.
We pulled out and I lit a cigarette, the windows rolled down and my arm hanging out, enjoying the cool breeze. Life was good. My boyfriend was here with me and my friends, and we were all singing along to the song on the radio from Green Day.
"Do you have the time to listen to me whine about nothing and everything all at once?" I yelled over the sound of the wind and the music at Jonathan. He grinned and pulled me back, kissing my neck and hugging me close.
"Ewww! Nasty gay love! No PDA allowed from you two!" Jason yelled, throwing Destiny's discarded shirt at us. The car was filled with giggles and scrambled comments as Samantha drove us down the dirt path to the creek. The car stopped before we hit the sand bank, and immediately we all spilled out of the car; sardines had no idea how it felt to be as tightly packed as we were.
I promptly stepped onto a condom wrapper, and spun around to face Samantha.
"Ewwww!!! I swear you do this on purpose, Sam! Every time YOU drive me to the creek, my door opens up to SOMETHING having to do with a used condom!" I yelled at her.
"Well, maybe if you and Jonathan wouldn't leave your paraphernalia laying around, you wouldn't step on it the day after!" She hollered back, and stuck her tongue out at me. Ouch, touché!
"C'mon, we gotta go be sexy so people will be jealous." Jonathan said, smiling at me and grabbing my hand. We ran across the sand to the water, and splashed in, Baywatch style. Well, the guys were missing a vital component (bouncing cleavage), but still! We waded down the creek, all of us playing around and trying to annoy one another. Samantha stole Destiny's bikini top within five minutes, and Jason, being the awesomely good boyfriend he is, immediately picked her up and held her facing him against his chest so no nipples showed, but he had a good view (he's a sneaky and horny lil bastard sometimes).
We reached the deep part of the creek and played around. I climbed a tree and Samantha tossed Destiny's bikini top up to me, and I draped it over a limb before grabbing the rope that was tied to the same limb.
"Hey Destiny! You have to lemme bum a cigarette if you want your bikini back!" I yelled down. She grinned and nodded quickly, pointing at the bank where the pack and her lighter was. I tossed it down, and swung off holding onto the rope and splashed down into the water beside Jonathan.
"Hey sexy, kiss me before you get smoker's breath." Jonathan said as soon as my head popped out of the water. I paddled over and wrapped my legs and arms around him, and frenched him as deep as I possibly could. We're showoffs, what can I say?
I hopped out of the water and lit a cigarette as soon as my hands were dry enough, and Jonathan sat beside me on the sand. Today was a good day. I had my baby, my friends, and we were all having fun. This summer was flying by way too fast.
I looked down at my nails, black with flecks of sand sticking to them, then looked over at Jonathan, who was playing with my hair. I flicked the cigarette away, and pushed him onto his back, letting my hands rest at his waistband. I pulled it down some, since it was up around his bellybutton. Come to think of it, it had been around his bellybutton this whole time.
As soon as I pulled it down, I saw the reason. There was a big purple bruise that started just below his navel, and stopped above his pubic line. Someone had punched him in the stomach, hard. He looked at me, shamefaced, and I just pulled the waistband further down, almost until it was showing something, and kissed the bruise gently, then covered it back up. I straddled him, and leaned in for a kiss.
"I'm sorry, baby. I didn't know. We have to talk about that though. You've had a lot of those bruises lately, and I'm gonna have to kill somebody for it." I whispered into his ear.
"Don't worry about it. Let's just have fun today, okay?" He asked, his eyes pleading with mine. I didn't want to, but I relented.
That uneasy feeling wouldn't go away though, not even after the day ended with all of us at Samantha's house eating ice cream out of the cartoon, battling with our spoons, sitting on her bed listening to music. We all slept over since it was getting late, and it had started to rain outside. Jonathan fell asleep with his head in my lap, laying on the bed while I sat at the head of it with my legs crossed. As he snored softly, I looked down at his tummy and saw just a tiny stripe of the bruise revealed where his shirt didn't quite meet his pants. I kissed him on the top of his head, and sighed, my fingers twirling through his hair. This was my boyfriend, my lover, and I'll be damned if I let anyone hurt him.