Obligatory warnings and disclaimers:
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If reading this is in any way illegal where you are or at your age, or you don't want to read about male/male relationships, go away. You shouldn't be here.
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I don't know any of the celebrities in this story, and this story in no way is meant to imply anything about their sexualities, personalities, or anything else. This is a work of pure fiction.
Questions and commentary can be sent to "writerboy69@hotmail.com". I enjoy constructive criticism, praise, and rational discussion. I do not enjoy flames, and will not tolerate them.
That said, we now continue.
"Close your eyes and hold out your hand," Justin said, standing over me.
I stared up at him, shading my eyes as I knelt on the lawn next to Brianna's bubble tray. It was a round plastic thing that had come with several different attachments, designed to make many tiny bubbles at once or one big one, along with a few other things. Right now Bri was chasing a big bubble across the yard while Joey poured more bubble liquid into the tray. The whole contraption was supposed to be easy to use, recommended for ages five and up, and Bri, under five, was having a hell of a good time chasing the bubbles across the backyard. Joey and I, on the other hand, were supposed to be watching Bri while Kelly was at work, and we were more or less covered with bubble liquid. The attachments dripped and splashed, and Joey wasn't as careful as I was, so every time he made a bubble he also flung a string of liquid bubble soap in a wide swath. I had it on my clothes and in my hair, and figured it was only a matter of time before one of us ended up with it in our eyes.
"Baby, I mean it," Justin said softly. He was smiling, and the sun was directly behind him, transforming him into a black outline, however familiar. "Close your eyes and hold out your hand."
"I probably should before Joey blinds me," I said, elbowing him in the ribs. My mouth tasted like soap, and I wanted a drink.
Joey was distracted, watching Bri run down the yard.
"Honey, don't go that way," he called, standing. Bri turned, giggled, and then kept running, toddling along with her pigtails flapping along behind her. "I better go get her."
It was her idea to get me out here. I had been sitting around reading while Joey tried to find stuff to entertain her with, trotting out one toy after another, when she had pulled that out of the bottom of the closet and carried it over to me. I was marking time, waiting for Justin to come back, but I was so amused to see her choose this thing, which probably cost about four dollars at the grocery store, over the amazingly expensive toys Joey was trying to amuse her with. I thought she'd get tired of it after a while, since children are notoriously fickle and I didn't remember bubbles as really being all that exciting, but we'd been playing with it for almost an hour and she wasn't bored yet.
Justin knelt beside me, squatting down, his thighs flexing in his khakis as he dropped down to my level. I was knees and ankles on the ground, probably picking up all kinds of grass stains, but he was hovering just above, only his sneakers touching the yard. He smiled at me, a bright, wide smile, all dazzling teeth and little dimples, framed by his pink lips. His eyes were picking up the colors of the sky and the grass and everything around us, the sun dazzling and crystalline in them, and his hair was golden and sparkling. He was wearing a sleeveless top, his shoulders gleaming, and the arm holes were wide enough so that as he leaned forward I caught a glimpse of the side of his chest, one reddish nipple caught in profile. I reached out, wanting to touch him, wanting to feel that skin, to see if it was as smooth and warm as I remembered it being from the last time I touched him, that morning, but he caught my hand.
"I told you, close your eyes," he said, shaking his head. "You don't listen well."
"Is this some kind of kinky sex game?" I asked, closing my eyes. He turned my outstretched hand over and began to draw little circles on my palm with the end of one finger. It almost tickled, but at the same time it was also deeply intimate, and I shivered a little. "If it is we really shouldn't do it out here in front of Bri."
"Knock it off," Justin whispered, his breath hot against my hand. He kissed my palm, softly, and then I felt the tip of his tongue tracing the lines there, running up and down my heart line and my life line and all the others. When he whispered, his breath caressed my skin, breezing over the wet trails his tongue left. He let go with one hand, but was still holding me with the other. I heard a rustling noise, and really wanted to open my eyes. "I bought you something."
After dinner last night Justin had been in one of his quiet moods, and I knew from the last one not to push him. He needed time, and space, so I read a book until bedtime, while he sat near me going through paperwork. He always had something to do, articles to read over and approve, contracts to sign, mail to answer, or he was working on his own stuff. Sometimes he was looking over song submissions, or writing his own, but sometimes he was just writing. I knew that he had a book deal, similar to the one the Britney and her mother had, but it had fallen through. The official story was that it was a matter of timing, but Justin had told me privately, a little sadness in his voice, that the publishing house had decided based on Britney's lackluster sales that they wouldn't be able to successfully market Justin's, either. He was trying to write it anyway, when he had time, to prove that he could, although he hadn't shared that with the rest of the guys other than JC.
When he was in his quiet moods, which always seemed to follow stressful conversations with his mother, Justin liked to be given his own space to do things, but every time I tried to leave that space he followed me. He didn't come right out and say it, but when I went to the kitchen for a drink, he followed me. When I went to the bathroom, he followed, straightening things in the bedroom. I asked if he needed something, and he said he was fine. I asked if I could do anything, and he said he just wanted to think. I sighed, and then I stopped asking, and accepted that the only comfort Justin wanted me to give was proximity. When I'd finally been tired enough to go to bed, I told Kelly and Joey goodnight, and Justin did as well, following me to the bedroom. We didn't make love, but he spooned against my back, holding me tightly and whispering that he loved me as we lay under the sheets, me in boxers and him in briefs.
When I woke up this morning, Justin wasn't in bed, or in the bathroom. I found a note next to my toothbrush from him.
"Chris-
I wanted to get out of the house, and I needed to do some stuff that I can't bring you along for. I want to take you to lunch when I get back, though, so please don't eat without me.
I love you.
-Justin"
I was curious, but figured it was stuff that he couldn't really bring his secret boyfriend to, meetings or interviews or something. If he'd still been with JC, he'd probably have been able to bring him, since they were all friends and went together to things all the time, but since he was dating me now, I guess I'd be sitting at home a lot.
Justin was sliding something onto my wrist, something cold and a little weighty, but not too heavy.
"Open your eyes," Justin said, and when I did he was right there, smiling expectantly.
I looked down and my eyes bulged. Justin had bought me a large gold watch, not big enough to be ostentatious, but definitely big enough to make a statement. The band was also gold, and the face was round. The reason I was so surprised, though, was the chain of diamonds on the face. They curved around the outer edge in a partial circle from the one all the way around, counterclockwise, to the five, making a large capital C. There was another one at the three, just a little point, and none of them were very large, but in the bright sunlight in the backyard they were dazzling. I looked up, and Justin was smiling expectantly at me.
"Oh, wow, Justin," I said, temporarily speechless. I had no doubts whatsoever that it was all real. It was too heavy and sparkly not to be. No one had ever given me something this big and expensive before. "Thank you. Thank you so much, it's, um, it's beautiful."
"Beautiful" was a much better word than "big".
"Take it off, please," Justin said, nodding down at it. I unfastened it, and Justin took it out of my hands to turn it over and show me the inscription on the back. "I love you - JRT" was engraved on the back of the watch face. Justin handed it back to me, and watched as I fastened it back on. He smiled shyly, his enthusiasm still peeking through, but mixed with a little nervousness, too. Justin hadn't bought me any presents, but his first one was definitely a big start. "Do you like it?"
"I love it, Justin," I answered honestly. I did, too, even if I was a little surprised. I pulled him over to kiss him, pressing my mouth to his, and heard Joey whistle behind us.
"Holy," he began, and Justin and I both dropped our eyes to Bri. "Spit. That's definitely, wow. It's big. And shiny. Really big."
"Shut up, Joey," I said, watching Justin's face fall a little. I turned his jaw slowly, pulling his eyes back around to mine. "It's beautiful, baby, just perfect. And the inscription, it, well, thank you. Thank you, Justin."
"I got it because I love you," Justin whispered, staring into my eyes. "And I wanted to thank you for yesterday."
"You don't have to thank me for that," I said, shaking my head. Joey led Bri away, to give us some space.
"But what you did," he began, kissing my cheek. "When you took care of me yesterday, the way you held me, and tried to make me feel better."
"I did that because I care about you, Justin," I said, caressing the side of his face. "You don't have to buy me presents for that. Just having you love me is enough, just being here with you."
"I was going to say the same thing," Justin whispered.
He leaned in, his eyes closing, and I tilted my head up to him. His lips pressed against mine as my arms circled around his shoulders, holding him tightly. I closed my eyes, too, completely comfortable, and felt his soft lips scraping over mine, pushing firmly against me. His chest was also pushing against me as he bent me over, and I found myself laying in the grass with Justin on top of me, holding himself up with his arms to keep from crushing me as his tongue darted around inside my mouth. The sun was streaming down on us, there was a light breeze, and I felt like we didn't have a care in the world as we just sprawled out on the lawn and kissed.
"Hey, I got neighbors, you two!" Joey yelled from the patio, breaking the spell. Justin laughed against my neck, forgetting to hold himself up as he giggled and squashed me, his body a firmly muscled weight on mine. One of my hands slipped under his t-shirt to feel the velvety skin of his back. "We already shot this video, but it was Justin and some chick."
"Your friends suck," I said, giggling, as Justin laughed against me. He leaned upward finally, and I stared up at him, watching the sun light fire in the tips of his hair. The sky behind him was the same color as his eyes, but it was full of clouds while his eyes were full of reflected me. I was struck, once again, at how gorgeous he could be, how casually beautiful he looked sometimes when he was all shaved and cleaned up. He was just as cute with whiskers and a hat rolled down over his hair, but that was a different kind of cute, not the way he looked now. Right now, I could roll around on the lawn with him forever.
"What?" he whispered, watching me.
"You're beautiful," I answered, and he smiled, flashing those stunning white teeth.
"So are you," Justin said, leaning down to kiss me again. He leaned back and took my hand, helping me up off the ground. His fingers darted along the side of his face. "You have grass in your hair."
"Thanks," I said, staring at him. "You have something by your mouth."
"I do?" Justin asked, reaching up, with the hand that wasn't holding mine, feeling around. "Did I get it?"
"Nope," I answered, leaning forward. I swiped my tongue up the side of his face, quickly, using just the tip. "That was it, right there."
"Oh, was it?" he asked, grinning. "Hold still. You have one, too."
"I do?" I asked, fluttering my eyelids comically as I turned my cheek toward him.
"Yeah, but yours is in your mouth," he said, grabbing me. Sometimes Justin's kisses were slow, deep kissed, but sometimes they were quick, urgent ones like what he was delivering now. His hands were on my back, holding me up as his mouth ground against mine and his tongue probed deeply into me. It was a thick, wet muscle, and I sucked at it, welcoming him into me. My hands were both under his shirt now, sliding up his chest, feeling the ridges of his abs and the curve of his pecs. His nipples were hot little nubs under my palms, hardening against my skin, and I could feel the sparse dusting of his chest hair, almost invisible in its delicacy.
When we broke, with a loud sucking sound, I gasped, inhaling.
"Maybe we should go in the house," I suggested.
"We have to," Justin agreed. "I need my car keys, and we have a bodyguard waiting, too."
"We're going to have sex in the car with a bodyguard?" I asked, letting him lead me by the hand across the yard.
"No," Justin answered, giggling and turning to kiss me again as he opened the door. He led me down the hall to our room, still holding my hand. "We're going to have lunch, like I said in my note."
"But what if it's not lunch I'm hungry for?" I asked playfully. Justin turned and grabbed my crotch, his hand kneading my balls and rubbing on my cock, which was now suddenly extremely hard. It was rough, but not painful, and he grinned at me mischievously.
"All you're getting for now is lunch," he said, his voice low and husky. "Then later, we're going to come back here, and I'm going to take off all my clothes. Then I'm going to take off all your clothes, and I want your cock hard and ready for me. I'm going to suck you, and then I want you to fuck me, and then fuck me again, in the bed, in the shower, or even on the floor. And I want it to be hard, and fast, and I want to feel your big, fat cock up inside me. I want you to make me scream your name."
"Jesus," I panted, knowing that I was leaking in my boxers. Justin leaned forward, still groping me, practically giving me a handjob in my pants, and chewed on my bottom lip for a second before letting go and stepping away, still holding my hand.
"But first, we're going to have lunch," he said, his voice rising back up to its normal level. "Now wash that soap off and let's go."
"I'll be right out," I said, walking painfully to the bathroom. My cock was throbbing in my pants, and it was on the tip of my tongue to yell at him for being such a tease when he tugged his shirt off, pulling it up and over his head in a long, languid flex. He went over to the dresser and started looking through it, whatever necklace he was wearing today hanging temptingly on his chest, drawing my eyes right down the symmetrical center of his muscles. He glanced up from the dresser and caught my eyes.
"What?" he asked. My mouth moved as I attempted an answer, and then he blushed and crossed his arms over his chest like a shy little girl. "Stop. Jeez. Get rinsed off, and use some really cold water."
"Sorry," I said, blushing as well. God, what was wrong with me? I'd gone for years without sex, and now suddenly I couldn't take one day's absence. This was really going to be a problem when Justin went on tour without me and I was left bouncing off the walls in the loft.
When I was done rinsing the bubble soap off of me Justin had finished getting changed, pulling on a long sleeved knit top that was casual but still managed to look a little sexy, and he led me to the car. We picked up the second bodyguard from the foyer, and then Justin led me out to his Mercedes. The two of us sat in the front, and the bodyguard got in the back, all of us in sunglasses. I waited for Justin to pull on a hat, but he had already told me that sometimes less was more, and that disguises could be a pain in the ass. Justin pointed out things while we drove, but really there wasn't that much to see. I'd noticed on the way to Joey's house that, for the most part, Florida really looked pretty much the same from the car.
We pulled in at a large, sprawling restaurant. It had a lot of covered porches, and seemed like kind of a roadhouse, except that it was in the middle of the city. I figured that the wooden, shacklike decor was completely artificial, but you could easily pick the whole place up and transplant it to the edge of a bayou swamp, and it wouldn't look at all out of place. There were no valets, but when we walked in they seemed to recognize Justin and immediately led us to a smaller dining room in the back. It wasn't just us, but it was far back from the door and only had a few tables. The bodyguard stayed at the bar, giving us some privacy, and the other people seated were some distance from our table. I looked at the menu and saw that it was mostly barbecue, which I was fine with.
"Do you eat here a lot?" I asked, looking around.
"Yeah, I love this place," Justin said, smiling. "I like the food, and they put me back here when I ask them to. It's not a private room, but they usually put me with people who won't bother me. Is it ok?"
"Yeah, it's fine," I said, looking around. "I just noticed that they seem to know you."
"Oh, they do," he said, nodding. "I wanted to take you out somewhere nice, and, you know, I wanted to show you a little bit of my life, like you did for me. I figured I could take you to the places I like to eat, and shop, and all that. We can even do some touristy stuff if you want to, but we don't have to."
"No, I do want to," I said, nodding as the waitress brought our drinks. I'd ordered a beer, but Justin couldn't have one, even if they probably would serve him. "I just didn't know if you'd have time to do stuff like that, and I didn't want to push you."
Justin took my hand, squeezing it once before letting go.
"You're not pushing me," he said, shaking his head. "I'll make time if it's something you want to do, ok?"
"I don't want to impose, or cause any trouble," I said quickly. "I don't want to get in the way of your schedules, and cause trouble with you and your friends."
"You won't," he said quickly. "Now let's have some lunch."
We were about halfway through lunch, Justin delicately eating a large plate of breaded fried catfish and me plowing messily through some extremely delicious ribs, when he let me know what our plans for the afternoon were. I actually brought it up, after I saw him check his watch for the fifth or sixth time.
"Justin, do we have to be somewhere?" I asked, wondering. The change in his body posture was immediate, and I wondered now what was wrong. He didn't seem scared or defensive, but suddenly he was uncomfortable. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing?" he asked, looking at me. I frowned, and he sighed. "OK, something, but it's nothing big. We need to, um, stop by my house. We have the photo shoot and the interview tomorrow, and I don't know how long we're staying at Joey's or anything, and there's just some of my stuff that I want."
"Why are you looking at your watch?" I asked. "It's not like your house is going to close."
Justin swallowed uncomfortably, as if he was having trouble, and I reached over and patted his hand. Like the hand squeeze earlier, it was quick, since we were in public, but he still seemed to appreciate it.
"I promised JC I would wait until he wasn't home to come by," Justin said, glancing at his watch again. He looked sadly down at the tabletop. "He, um, he didn't want to see me. I told him I needed my stuff, and he said that he wouldn't be home for a couple hours this afternoon, and told me to come then."
"Justin, I'm sure he didn't mean to hurt your feelings," I said, even though I had no idea whether or not it was true. "Maybe it just upsets him to see you, like he said, and he's just trying to avoid that."
"It's not me that he's trying to avoid," Justin said, frowning. As soon as he said it he clapped his hand over his mouth. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything."
"What did you mean by that?" I asked, feeling cold. I thought I knew what he meant, but I wanted to hear him say it. Justin wouldn't meet my eyes, but he continued.
"I, he asked if I was bringing you," Justin said quietly. "I called him this morning, while I was at the jewelry store picking up your watch, and I asked if he minded if I stopped by. He was, when I said I wanted to, he sounded so excited. He was trying to cover it, but I know him. I know the sound of his voice, and I know when he's really holding something in. He sounded so happy to see me, to hear that I was coming, and then he asked if you were coming with me."
"And when you said yes, he told you to come when he wasn't there," I finished for him.
God damn him. I could understand that JC was unhappy, and that he was in pain. Losing someone like Justin could put anyone in pain, so I could empathize with his heartache and loss, but this was totally a dick move. JC must have known that Justin wanted to be his friend, because he had to be feeling the same kind of loss that Justin was, and for him to do this, to hold his friendship out conditionally, was dirty and underhanded. To think that the other day I'd actually thought that he was being kind of classy about the whole breakup, and now to hear this? I looked at Justin's face, at the way his eyebrows dropped and him mouth turned down, and I wanted to slap JC. I wanted to leave a big red handprint across those sharp cheekbones, and leave tears standing in those greenish blue eyes.
But that wasn't what Justin needed right now.
"Justin, I'm sorry," I said, not wanting to badmouth him. I didn't want to be one of those guys who talked about how awful the old boyfriend was, and what a dick he was, especially not if the old boyfriend was going to continue to be part of our lives in some capacity. "I don't have to go with you. You could drop me back at Joey's, or I could wait in the car."
"What?" Justin asked, looking up at me in surprise. He sounded a little bit annoyed. "What do you mean?"
"I know how much you wanted to see him, so if it's me being there that's bothering him," I began, shrugging. Justin cut me off.
"No," he said, shaking his head. "No. I know what you're trying to do, and I appreciate it, but no. I'm not going to play this stupid little game with him, and I'm not going to leave you out in the car like, I don't know, like I'm ashamed of you or I shouldn't be bringing you around or something."
"Justin, I don't feel that way," I said.
"But that's the way JC wants to make you feel," he said, frowning. "I won't do that to you. I want to show you my house. I want you to see where I live, and I want you to be there with me. I just, well, never mind."
He'd sounded so angry, but it just seemed to drain out of him, and I took his hand, mindful that none of the other people eating were looking.
"What?" I asked, and he shook his head, just once. "No, Justin, tell me, please. Let it out, whatever it is."
"I just," he began, looking up. "I thought he'd want to see me as much as I want to see him. I thought he'd miss me, too, but he's just more interested in playing these stupid little games."
"I'm sorry," I said, letting go of his hand. "I'm sorry he's hurting you like this."
Justin shook his head, as if clearing it, and then smiled at me.
"None of that," he said. "Remember what you told me yesterday about mama? I don't want you to apologize for things that JC does. Now, why don't we get some dessert, and then I'll take you to my house, and we'll be back at Joey's in time for dinner? I told Kelly I'd pick up pizza and wings, and we're all just going to sit around and watch television and have a good time, and we won't think about any of this, ok?"
"Sure," I said, signaling the waitress.
After we finished up our dessert, Justin made sure the bodyguard was done eating, and then he paid the check and we were back in the car, heading for his house. He glanced at the clock a few times while we were driving, and I wondered what kind of window we had as far as time. I didn't want to ask, and open the whole thing back up again, but Justin didn't seem worried, so I decided to ignore it, too. I noticed as we drove that we were definitely entering a more upscale area, as the streets were wider, the landscape grew more and more lush, and there was water everywhere. Justin, laughing, explained that somehow, in a state composed largely of mosquito ridden swamps, it was actually a status symbol to live near water.
"If you see any alligators, run in a zigzag, because they don't have peripheral vision," Justin said as we cleared the gatehouse at the front of his neighborhood. I couldn't tell if he was serious or not.
We left the bodyguard in the car, and Justin walked me through the house like a real estate agent trying to sell a home. He pointed out everything in the kitchen, showed me the pool and hot tub out back, and all the rooms in the downstairs. Climbing the steps, he seemed a little pensive as we got closer to the bedroom, but he hid it well as he showed me the guest bedrooms and bathrooms, and then finally his room. It was immaculately clean, the bed neatly made, and I wondered if JC had taken to sleeping in one of the other rooms. There wasn't anything like a lived in feel, as if someone had gone behind him and scrubbed away all the traces of daily life. There were still pictures of the two of them together on the nightstands and dressers, and toiletries and jewelry were scattered on the dresser tops, but overall it looked kind of like someone had tidied up and then closed the room off. I almost expected to see dust on everything.
"I just wanna get some clothes and stuff from the closet," Justin said, sounding a little uneasy as he looked around. I felt the same way.
"Do you mind if I walk around the house a little?" I asked. "I mean, unless you need help or something."
"No, go ahead," he answered, opening the closets. "I know where everything is, and I'll only be a couple minutes."
"OK," I said, shrugging. "I wanted to get a better look at some of the stuff in the music room."
He smiled, and I knew that he was proud of it. It was easy to see why, too, since the room was kind of a chronicle of the band's career, and their rise to fame. There were pictures of all of them on the walls, candids and professional photographs, just like the ones I'd seen at Chris's house. There were also framed magazines, and cases on the walls with awards in them. Some of the awards I recognized, the ones from MTV and shows like that, but others I had to lean forward and read the plaques to. There were also odd pieces of memorabilia around the room that I wanted to ask Justin about, because there must be stories that went with them. Why else would one of the end tables have an astronaut helmet on it?
As I was looking over a mosaic of Hard Rock Cafe menus I heard a noise behind me.
"Is that you babe?" I asked, not turning around.
"No, sorry," JC answered from behind me.
I guess our window of time had closed.
To be continued.