Please send your comments to me, I will read, reply and take them onboard.
I write fiction; I do not know what the people mentioned in this story are like in reality, nor do I care (real people are too boring to write about!).
Please note: I neither support nor condemn the use of recreational drugs. They are neither good nor bad; they're just molecules after all. But for heaven's sake read-up on what goes into drugs and their side effects before you decide to put your life on the line by taking them.
Chapter Ten
The interview for the newspaper went without a hitch, although eyebrows were raised when Justin followed me into the room. That all happened two hours ago, now Justin and I were sitting in a small room in a coffee shop for my interview with 'The Gay Times'. Laura was chatting into her mobile on the other side of the shop about her other clients, as she had been doing all morning. The idea, it seemed, was to have an informal interview whilst the photographer took some simple pictures, nothing fancy.
Two guys walked into the hired-out shop, the interviewer and photographer.
"Hello. I'm Daniel and this is Greg," said the guy without the camera.
"Hi" I replied, "I'm Darren and this is Justin. It's nice to meet you both."
"Hello" Justin added from where he was sitting beside me nursing a latte.
"Well, shall we begin?" asked the reporter as he sat down opposite Justin and I and pulled out his Dictaphone.
The interview progressed reasonably well. Justin was forced to move in order that Greg could get the shots he wanted without getting Justin in them. That left Daniel and I chatting over our mugs of coffee.
"Hey" Daniel said as if remembering something, "I thought you might want to take a look at this" with that he produced a copy of a UK tabloid from his bag and handed it to me.
"Not another paper taking cheap shots I hope" I said with a joking reference to the story ran by the local paper the day before.
"No, this is something else completely. It's on page six"
I flicked to the correct page and there was another headline I will never forget:
'Dishing The Dirt: Darren Gallouedec my Ex'
I scanned the page quickly, ignoring the large and unflattering picture of me and the general text of the article. I inhaled sharply as my eye caught the small picture of the source for the story, Peter Baynon. Daniel and Greg had stopped for a while in order to give me time to read the article, which was a good thing because my eyes remained staring at the face of my old school bully. My preoccupation with the photo would have sparked unwanted questions concerning the 'friendship' between Peter and I if Daniel and Greg had been paying attention. The quiet in the coffee shop obviously disturbed Justin because when I glanced up to try and begin my answer he was looking at me in concern. I smiled slightly to ease his feelings before turning my attention back to the interview.
"There's really nothing to tell" I began.
"So it's all lies?" Daniel prompted.
"No. I did go to school with him and we were in the same year but we never were together" I finished.
"So you're saying what this Pete guy has been saying about you and him is false"
"Yes"
"An that's an exclusive is it?" Daniel's voice sounded more excited now.
"Yes" I answered reluctantly, realising that Daniel was not showing me the article for my benefit and, in fact, was solely interested in getting a good story out of me. I managed to force a smile, which Greg promptly photographed. Laura, who had just finished her marathon phone call, noticed my unease at the direction of questioning and stepped in.
"I think we'll have to end soon if you don't mind" she politely said as she approached to where we were sitting, "We have another appointment which we can't be late for"
"Well, I think we have enough" Daniel said, stopping his Dictaphone. "Thank you Darren," he said to me before turning back to Laura "We'll send you a copy of the layout before we print." With that Laura, Greg and Daniel wandered off and out of the shop, leaving Justin and I behind.
"Hey" Justin said as he stood up and walked back to his old seat, "What's in the papers now?" He indicated the newspaper that I was still holding.
"Oh, nothing really. Just a story from someone claiming to be a former lover of mine."
Justin made a quick noise.
"We said the women wouldn't keep their mouths closed for long," he said as he peered over to read the article.
"It's not a woman" I replied flatly, moving my arm so Justin didn't have to lean- over to read it.
"Hey!" Justin said after a couple of seconds of reading, "That guy's the one who used to beat you up!"
"Yeah" I sighed, "That's what threw me when I saw it."
"Well, it's all lies then" Justin said as he glanced up from his reading to check my eyes for sincerity. "You never had sex with him, let alone dated the guy did you?"
"Ahm... Yes, err no. We never dated, no. And I never slept with him either." I said trying to hide my continued unease with the topic. Justin glanced up again after my faltering answer, his eyes maintained contact for a second or two before returning to the newspaper text obviously finding what they were looking for in my eyes.
"Hey, you two!" Laura shouted from the cafe door, "We've gotta go to make this TV thing"
Justin and I both got up and walked out of the coffee shop and into our car, Justin still carrying the paper.
I squeezed out of the opening lift doors and into the first floor corridor of the TV station. In my anxiety I stormed off down the hallway before Justin could catch up. I turned a corner and was faced by Joey and Chris chatting in the hall. I stopped dead in my tracks as they both noticed my presence; Joey's expression barely changed whereas Chris's immediately became cold and distant. Before I even opened my mouth he turned, storming off into a room, which I guessed to be a dressing room. Just as the door slammed behind Chris, Justin caught up with me.
"Hey..." Justin stopped short upon seeing Chris and feeling the tension in the air that had been left by Chris. "Come on" Justin said grabbing my arm and pulling me past Joey.
"Hey!" I exclaimed yanking my arm away from Justin.
"Darren..." Joey began before being cut off by Justin.
"You said enough last night and this morning Joey. Don't begin it all again now!" Justin barked, shocking me with the ferocity in his tone.
"Justin..." Joey tried to speak again, but was stopped as before.
"Stop already Joe!" Justin said. Joey admitted defeat and pushed between Justin and I maintaining eye contact with me before disappearing into the room Chris had gone into.
"What's going on?" I demanded.
"Well Joey..." Justin began.
"Not with him, with you!"
"What?"
"Why did you stop me talking to Joey?"
"Well you didn't hear what was said last night!" Justin said trying to defend his actions.
"Did Joey say something about me?"
"Not really. But he supported Chris!"
"I support Chris" I replied causing a very confused look to cover Justin's face, "You guys need a serious talk about what's going on" I elaborated.
"How can you support him?" Justin asked.
"I... I just think that before I joined the tour you guys were all really good friends, and now look at you all. It's like I'm some kind of poison."
"It has nothing to do with you Darren," Justin said, leaning across to place his hand on my shoulder. "We just didn't realise what Chris and Joey believed in."
"All I know is you lot would be better off if I'd never come along." I stated.
"No way would we!" Justin exclaimed, "Besides isn't best that we know the truth now at least?"
"Well, whatever, you all need to get sorted" I replied.
"And you two need to be on the set in half an hour" JC said, imitating my previous statement as he stepped out of a door.
I laughed in an attempt to rid myself of some of the tension and anxiety the run-in with Chris had given me. JC clearly thought I was laughing at him.
"It's no joke, we're on soon" JC stressed.
Justin nodded his understanding to JC and glanced back to check I was OK before wandered off to another dressing room being indicated by JC's arm. JC and I remained in the corridor for a minute or two. The air between us crackled with tension as we both knew that we were thinking about my future on the tour. Before either of us said something to break the atmosphere, JC turned on his heal and went back into the room from which he had emerged. This left me standing alone in a corridor without a clue what to do.
"Hey" Laura's authoritative tone rang out down the hallway, "What are you doing waiting here?"
I gave a brief shrug to which she responded by grabbing my arm and pulling me down the hall to a door, behind which I assumed was my dressing room.
"You're on in twenty, so get a move on," Laura said with a mixture of humour and sternness in her voice as she propelled me through the door she held open.
The TV show was nothing special, no groundbreaking originality in the questions, no way of keeping clear of the usual perform and questions format. In fact I would have been my best TV appearance so far (in my opinion at least!) if it weren't for the obvious dislike and covering-up that was going on between N'Sync and I. Luckily the show only required N'Sync and I to be on together for ten minutes, any longer and the presenter wouldn't have been able to hide the utter distain and animosity directed by Chris to me. Justin and Lance spent all their efforts trying to take attention away from the divisions between us all whilst JC and I tried to ignore Chris leaving Joey to try a tame Chris's emotions with a mixture of glares and well-time light punches.
After the TV appearance all six of us were bundled into a limo that was to take us to the airport. Joey and Chris took up the rear seats, JC and Lance the long length-ways one and this meant that Justin and I were on the forward seats directly opposite Joey and Chris.
To say the atmosphere in that car was black was an understatement. It was so saturates with malice from Joey and Chris and anger from the other N'Synckers and I, that you could taste it on every breath. Occasionally Chris's eyes would glance over mine, for they never rested on my eyes only seeing straight through them. His cold stare touched somewhere inside me, numbing my resolve to do the best thing for N'Sync. With every pass of those icy pupils my mind became more and more set that I would fight to stay on the tour and to maintain the friendships I had found within the group.
This silence continued at the airport; no one spoke except when it was absolutely necessary. It was not until we were all seated in the VIP lounge that anyone spoke up.
"Justin and I are going to try and find some Coffee. Anyone want anything?" Lance said as both he and Justin stood. No one replied so they set off leaving the four of us in the uncomfortable silence again.
"I'm off to the toilet." JC announced before making his way between the seats, which were surprisingly full, and heading to the toilets.
I turned to look out the window, trying to work out whether our plane was in and how long I had to wait before I could get away from this mental torture. You see I, as always, was booked in economy class whereas N'Sync got to fly first class and this meant that once on the plane I was several hundred people away from Chris's accusing eyes.
"Hey Darren" Chris said, trying to get my attention. I turned my head and waited for the abuse to begin. "How's the tour going?"
I was thrown for a minute by the quite normal tone of Chris's voice.
"Uh... fine" I replied.
"Oh, well. It's a pity you're leaving then isn't it" Chris replied with a great degree of spite in his tone. I rolled my eyes, which only served to anger Chris further:
"I don't know why you're bothering to fight it! Everyone knows you're bad- news for N'Sync." Chris ranted as he stood up. This caused me to stand next as I was rather worried about where this would end up. Finally Joey stood and placed himself behind Chris, well out of the firing line.
"I'm not leaving this tour just because some arsehole like you gets all bent out of shape!" I replied.
"You're just some one-hit, no talent, sad little manufactured act!" Chris yelled back at me. "You have no right to perform alongside an international act like us!" Joey placed a hand on Chris's shoulder to try and stop the tirade. "I wonder just how many guys you fucked to get a record deal!"
"Well you'll be glad to know Chris that I didn't 'fuck' anyone to get my deal." I answered sarcastically. I could JC emerging from the toilets a hundred or so yards behind Chris but he barely noticed us as he made his way over to the newspaper stand.
"Yeah. It was all 'lip-service' if you know what I mean!" he replied loudly causing JC's head to whip round in order to locate the source of the outburst. When JC realised the scene unfolding in full view of the fifty or so other occupants of the room he began to walk very quickly over to where we the three of us were standing.
"Tell me, was it tiring sleeping with all those record executives in order to get on this tour?" Chris shouted as he slowly came further towards me. JC arrived on the scene and gave Joey a questioning look, to which he replied with a shrug.
"I think you know the answer!" I shouted back trying to resist the urge to sink to Chris's level and start a massive slanging match in the airport. Chris laughed in a very forced way as he turned his back to me. Suddenly he swung around and aimed a punch at my face. Time appeared to slow down as Joey and JC both grabbed Chris. As I pulled back to try and avoid Chris's fist it swung within an inch of my chin, if it weren't for JC and Joey I would have been floored.
I stood there, shocked at Chris's actions as JC and Joey tried to stop him attempting another punch and simultaneously talking to him to calm him down. I subconsciously rubbed my chin, the target for Chris's fist before turning away from my attacker and wandering off to stare out the window once again. The whole incident had left me rather shaken as you can imagine. I knew that Chris was not in favour of my presence on the tour, but I never realised the amount of resentment he held for me. In fact the malice that I felt from him made me uncertain of where or not he believed the accusations he had levelled at me. The very thought that he could believe that I would sleep with anyone to further my career stirred my more base sentiments. I am not one to prostitute myself for my music.
"Hey!" Justin's usual exuberant tone broke my train of thought as he bounded over to me with Lance and coffee in tow, "Where are the others?"
"Over there" I said indicating with a quick and rather vague movement of my arm. Justin and Lance's expressions fell ten floors when they saw JC sternly speaking to Chris whilst Joey tried to hide their argument from the other passengers sitting close by.
Lance's face hardened as he stormed over to the three presumably to find out what had happened. Justin turned his gaze back to me.
"We got you an up-grade" Justin stated half-heartedly.
"Thanks" I replied, laughing slightly at the irony. "What's so funny?" Justin asked innocently.
"I guess it's just the idea of spending the next few hours in a tin cylinder with Chris's attitude isn't that appealing to me, no matter where I sit" I smiled slightly and watched a plane take-off.
"It's not my idea of a fun time either" Justin said with a mild laugh. We looked at each other before turning to sit down and wait for our flight. Neither of us said anything more until the flight was called, instead we left each other to their thoughts.
In fact, very little was said during the entire journey. Everyone was still wrapped up in the events that had occurred in the airport.
Justin and I were sitting next to each other, behind us were Joey and Chris and behind them were JC and Lance. I sat, staring out the tiny window listening to the aeroplane's general noise. I had given up on having any kind of conversation with Justin when, after only ten minutes in the air, he had fallen asleep with his head on my shoulder. After flipping through the complimentary magazine, finding that I didn't want to read any of it and then reading it all out of boredom I decided to try and catch a forty winks. I leant my head against the gently vibrating windowpane and closed my eyes. On doing so my ears tuned themselves away from the incessant hum of the plane and towards the conversations going on around me. In front of me a couple were complaining about the holiday they had just finished. Apparently they were most put out to find that sections of their hotel had been commandeered by some 'popular music group' called 'Insight or something'. I sniggered to myself and tried to pick out another conversation. My ears picked up the familiar voice of Joey:
"I just don't understand you Chris" Joey said sounding puzzled.
"There's nothing to get, it's just I don't like the way Darren is making us look like a group of queers" Chris hissed back. I sucked in my breath on hearing Chris's statement.
"He is not." Joey countered, "He's just hanging out with some friends, if the media take it wrong then we'll all have to set them straight"
"'Set them straight'," Chris mimicked and laughed, "It's not for us four to go around clearing up after Darren and his latest 'special friend'."
"Look Chris, we've all faced these rumours before, we can face them again"
"We didn't have our own little faggot in tow then did we?" Chris asked rhetorically and with a sizable measure of spite. I bit my tongue, trying to resist the urge to jump over my seatback and knock Chris out. I never had been one for violence, not after having experienced the full range of a person's hatred for most of my school career. Being bullied, picked on, beaten up, whatever, it made me realise that if after all Peter and his friends did to me I didn't change then no matter how much violence you apply, it won't get you anywhere.
"You know no one's gonna listen to you if you speak like that no matter whether what you're saying's valid or not" Joey commented.
"I don't give a flying fuck!" Chris exclaimed quietly, "Every day 'he' stays on tour our reputation gets more and more permanent damage done to it. Look at him now..." I felt someone lean against the back of my seat so I tried to make myself look asleep. "They're all over each other!"
"I don't think so Chris, they're just sleeping that's all"
"Well Justin should be more careful. If this got out his marriage would be in some deep shit. And don't forget, Britney'll be there tonight" Chris finished, leaving Joey, and I, to think over their conversation.
'Britney will be where tonight?' I pondered before falling asleep for real.
Chapter Eleven
It turned out that Britney was going to be at her engagement party. Steve and I were invited and we both went along. I was glad that Steve was coming because I knew that Justin would be too busy to stop and that JC and Lance would be talking to their older friends and of course a polite chat with Chris and his sidekick Joey was out of the question.
After the day I had I was not really in the mood to party, my sleep on the plane had been filled with nightmares where Pete and Chris joined forces and turned all my friends against me. Scarily enough, that was a possibility in the real world as well. But, this party did have an open bar, so if I got too depressed I could always magnify it with alcohol. Plus for some odd reason the tour schedule meant we had the next day off completely, I guess that was why they decided to have the engagement party that night.
My gladness at Steve agreeing to come was shattered when upon arriving at the bar / club that had been specially hired, Steve decided to piss-off and hang around with Lance all night. This left me at the bar. My mild depression intensified with every sip of alcohol until I was thinking about phoning Laura up from the bar and quitting.
"Hey, you must be Darren!" An overly cheerful voice interrupted my thoughts. I turned around to find that Britney Spears was standing beside me, trying to start a conversation. Normally I would have reacted by doing an impression of a goldfish whilst pointing out that she was indeed Britney Spears, but the alcohol had removed any idea of being star-struck.
"Hi" I replied, offering my hand, "Nice to meet you, and congrats on the engagement." She giggled inanely, I downed the remainder of my drink.
"Justin's told me a lot about you"
"Really?" I asked.
"Yeap. He's always going on about you."
I laughed to try and shrug of my embarrassment. Justin wandered over and standing behind Britney he casually placed his arms around her waist.
"Aww" I cooed, "You two suit each other". It was Britney's turn to blush. Britney leant to whisper into my ear.
"You know, he's not just a pretty face," I questioned her with my expression, "He's a damn fine kisser too!" She laughed at her own joke. I desperately tried to stop my expression revealing anything. Over Britney's should though, Justin's face metamorphosed into one of shock, then panic and finally, on realising Britney meant nothing by her remark, his face slipped back into his usual expression. Britney turned to the bartender to order drinks for us all.
"I heard that too" I replied looking at Justin whilst Britney's attention was elsewhere. Justin suddenly looked uncomfortable. He whispered something in Britney's ear causing her to giggle in her very annoying way. They made their excuses and exited to the dance-floor.
With no one talking to me, my drinking went uninterrupted and unchecked. I don't know how much I drank; but it was too much in too short a time. Before long the pounding music and sweaty dance-floor somehow seemed inviting.
In a drunken blur I was in the middle of the floor, bodies grinding all around me. The dark lights removed any remaining ideas of embarrassment and I began to dance. You see, although my job entails dancing in front of several thousand, I don't like dancing in clubs (when sober). Before I knew what was going on some (reasonably) cute guy was practically dancing on top of me, his pelvis gyrating against mine in time to the beat. Letting the alcohol take over I decided to give as good as I got. There was not enough room between our bodies for light to pass as we danced, literally, together. Our arms intertwined as our hands made their way up and down our single body. We kissed, well, we practically made-out in the middle of the dance-floor as we groped each other unceremoniously. I don't know how long we continued like that for but after a while a third person joined us. I turned to see the newcomer to our dance, which was becoming less and less like dancing and more and more like foreplay. Luckily the dim lighting and dense crowd had stopped anyone noticing what we were doing. The first guy slid his arms around my waist and gently kissed the spot where my neck joined my left shoulder as the new guy pressed himself up to my chest and proceeded to kiss me. The kiss was the usual empty drunken meeting of lips you get in a club, but the taste was different. The usual alcohol / cigarette mix was replaced by a slightly bitter taste, not one I had experienced before. As this guy's tongue worked its way into my mouth I realised the source of the odd flavour; a small object passed into my mouth on the end of his tongue; a small tablet.
Normally I would never conceive of taking any drug in a club situation, but for some reason my judgement was not working properly at that moment because I barely thought twice before accepting the pill. I gently sucked upon it, enjoying its novel taste before passing it on to the guy kissing my neck in a similar fashion. We passed the pill back and forth a couple of times before the second guy decided to keep it, good job as well. The alcohol, the small amount of drug in my blood and the hormones being released due to the highly intimate dancing were all coupling together and all three of us danced on for what seemed like forever.
Suddenly I was aware that the darkness that had been around us had been replaced by light. It turned out that the lighting guy had seen our 'performance' and decided to draw it to the attention of everyone around us. I swung my head around to see where the new light was coming from and above me I could see Justin and Britney leaning over a railing watching the dance-floor. Britney pointed to me, leant in to Justin's ear and laughed; Justin simply looked at me and then looked away again. Again the normal emotions I should have felt were covered by the intoxicants in my blood. One feeling was not masked by the drug and drink; a feeling of nausea was slowly building in my stomach. Rather ungraciously I left the two guys I was with and stumbled off the dance-floor and headed into the toilets.
I scrambled into one of the cubicles and falling to my hands and knees I promptly threw up into and over the toilet. I must have vomited the entire week's food I was sick that much, and the entire experience left me so weak I could barely move enough to prop myself up against the cubicle wall. I sat there, my left hand in a puddle of someone's piss and my shirt stained by my own bile. I remained there for sometime occasionally retching over the toilet bowl. My head was pounding, my mouth was dry and I was shivering slightly. I must have spent a long time in the toilet although I'll never know just how long; my mind kept on fading in and out of drunkenness / sleep / consciousness. I do remember some guy standing over my limp and unresponsive body whilst he took a slash in the toilet, but I was too far gone at that point to protest in anyway, even when he stood on my fingers my brain failed to register the pain for thirty seconds. When I finally managed to move the steady pounding of the music had stopped, although loud voices were still present. When a familiar voice yelled my name out in the toilets I just about managed a 'yes' in reply.
"Oh my god! Darren, are you alright?" Steve said in shock as he pushed the cubicle door open. I managed a slight nod before throwing up again. Steve rubbed my back to reassure me. When I finished Steve pulled me to my feet and helped me over to the sink where I (more like we) tried to clean my face up. Together we stumbled out of the toilet.
"There you are!" Came JC's voice full of concern, "We've been looking for you".
I turned my head to look at Steve. His eyes were filled with deep concern; my guilt took over, fuelled by the remaining alcohol in my system, and I dissolved into tears.
I vaguely remember getting into a taxi with JC, Steve and Lance. Somewhere along the line I asked were everyone else was and someone replied that Justin and Britney had gone back to the hotel about an hour ago shortly followed by Joey and Chris. I was still unable to form any kind of coherent ideas of my surrounds when we pulled up to the hotel (backdoor of course; I was with international pop stars here!). I guess all three of them helped me into the lift for the long journey upwards; we were on the top floor of the hotel. I guess I must have looked as bad as I felt as JC insisted that I stay in his room so he could keep an eye on me during what remained of the night.
I collapsed onto one side of JC's king-size bed but before I entered the land of nod JC pulled me back up to my feet and proceed to strip me down to my boxers before pushing the duvet back and gesturing for me to get in. JC walked over to a table and poured a large glass of water, which he handed to me on his return. As I drank my way through the everlasting glass of water, JC sat and watched me intently.
"You know, I'll never pass-out if you watch me" I tried to joke. JC's expression hardened even more and I resigned myself to drinking in silence.
When I had finished I lay my head back on the pillow as JC disappeared into the bathroom. He emerged after a few minutes in his nightclothes and crossed the room to get into bed beside me.
"Are you OK?" He asked with a voice filled with kindness as he leant on his elbow to try and see if I was about to lie. I nodded in response. JC's hand gently pushed some hair away from my face as his eyes lost some of their worry. A small smile glanced across his face before he turned over to switch the light off.
We hadn't been in the dark for five minutes before JC turned them back on.
"Shit. I'm sorry" JC said, "I forgot to call Chris to say we were back." He picked up the phone and dialled.
"Hey, Chris."
"Yes we're back."
"No, Darren's here with me." My ears perked up on hearing my name mentioned.
"No."
"No, there's no need." JC's voice was beginning to sound stressed.
"Really, just stay there OK!" JC said with force into the phone.
"Look Chris that's the last thing we all need at this hour!"
"No you're n..." JC stopped short as Chris had obviously hung up.
JC turned to me to say something, but he was stopped by the pounding at the door.
Chapter Twelve
The noise at the door intensified until JC stumbled over to it, still in the dark, and pulled it open slightly.
"Let me in!" yelled Chris from outside as he forced the door open. "Where is he?" Chris hit the wall a few times trying to turn the lights on. JC's eyes were filled with panic as he was torn between staying to try and help or going to fetch more.
Suddenly the lights turned on, drenching the room with their artificial brightness. I squinted, trying to make out what was going on as my eyes adjusted to the new light.
"What the fuck were you doin'?" Chris shouted. I couldn't tell were he was and I scrambled about in the bed trying to distance myself from the source of the voice. Before I realised what was happening my hand slipped off the edge of the bed causing me to tumble out onto the floor.
Slowly I opened my eyes. Chris stood directly over me, JC just behind him looking petrified.
"Were you two screwing?" Chris yelled at the both of us as he noted both our states of undress. His voice's slight waver betrayed the amount alcohol Chris had consumed.
"Chris! What's goin' on?" JC yelled back.
"You know, faggot-boy here is trying to fuck his way to number one in the charts!" Chris leant down and grabbed a fistful of my hair and proceeded to yank me to my feet with it causing me to scream out in pain.
"Chris, for god's sake stop it!" JC shouted. Chris responded by throwing me onto the bed and then taking a swing at JC. Chris's fist landed squarely on JC's jaw, sending him staggering backwards. I made a yelping noise seeing what Chris did and suddenly feared for my own safety.
Chris turned his attention back to me and propelled me off the bed and into the wall. The pain of the impact of my spine on the wall coursed through my nerves. JC stared on for a second before scrabbling to his feet and running out the door to bang on Lance's door opposite.
"What the fuck do you think you're playin' at?" Chris hissed at me, his face only inched from mine. He punched me in my stomach causing me to try on double over, yet Chris's grip on me prevented that. "Dancing like a rent-boy in front of our friends! They're all gonna think that N'Sync are a group of little arse-fuckers now!" Chris emphasised his words by forcing his crotch into mine with every word. I tried to reply but Chris slapped his hand over my mouth with such force that it banged my head against the wall. "Don't you dare speak to me queer!" I whimpered as a tear escaped from my eye. "And don't fuckin' cry you little wuss!" Chris took a step back and once again punched me in the stomach. As I began to fall forwards he used his forearm across the top of my chest to force me back against the wall. Dazed and confused I tried to blink in order to clear my mind, it failed.
Suddenly Lance and JC were pulling Chris off me as he punched and kicked. Unsupported I collapsed under my own weight into a heap on the carpet. In a matter of moments Justin, Britney and Joey all arrived, obviously all woken by the shouting. They all dove in to try and hold Chris until he calmed. I moved my head and saw the open door. Mustering the last of my strength I half stumbled half crawled out into the corridor. My head was swimming from the remains of the evening's partying and the beating it had just taken and my left arm gripped the site of pain in the right side of my abdomen. Using the walls I pulled myself upright and guided myself to the end of the corridor and the stairs to the roof.
The strong wind bit into my bare skin, helping to clear my head slightly. This was a bad thing because the effect of the alcohol was to dampen the pain I was experiencing. I staggered away from the stairs, towards the edge of the roof.
"Darren!" Justin yelled out from the stairs. It was quite obvious he had been woken up because he too was only dressed in his underwear.
'Shit' I thought. I hadn't even got half way. I turned to face him and tried to smile, but this only caused me to cough-up some blood. Justin ran over and wrapped his arms around me.
"It's alright" He said gently, "It's gonna be OK." I tried to believe him but the amount he was shaking was too much for it just to be shivering. I gave up trying to fight it and something snapped inside me. I began to cry, deep, raking sobs, into Justin's shoulder. He too sobbed gently as he stroked my hair in an attempt to console the both of us.
End of Part Four.
Hey, drop me a line, tell me what you think: svjsr@hotmail.com All comments gratefully received. JJ