When my mom woke me up Saturday, I didn't feel 18. She told me that my married, older sister was going into labor early and she and dad were going to be flying out to help with the family and make sure she was ok. She apologized for not being able to be here for my birthday and gave me a kiss. First thought, "Yeah, I'm an uncle!" Second thought, "Yeah, home alone!" Dave had said he'd come over around noon to pick us up, so I had a comfortable two hours to get ready. Two hours to stress over practicing my first sentence, figuring out what image I wanted to portray, what I wanted to smell like and pray to whomever was listening that Scott didn't screw it up for me.
The phone rang, my mom yelled up that it was for me and that they were leaving now and to "behave myself" while they were gone. Don't they know me? I cleared my throat and practiced my hello several times before answering. The voice on the other end greeted me, "Hi, it's Ben! I was wondering if I could come over to see those pictures today." Unintentionally, I looked to my desk to check that the pictures were still there.
"Oh, uh, well ... I'm going to be busy this afternoon but I should be free after three."
"Sounds good. I was wondering if you'd even talk to me after yesterday."
"Oh that! Don't worry about it. I would've been naive to expect any different."
He must've felt the chill in my voice because he didn't respond. I'm not sure how, but I swear I heard him bite his lip. I like to have the upper hand so I just let him sit in a silent hell for a couple seconds. When he spoke, his words seemed carefully chosen, "Well at least you're honest, sometimes harsh, but you're still honest."
Now I was the one with nothing to say! I scrambled for the original topic, "Oh, okay. I should be home around three." As soon as the phone hit the switch, I had already switched my thoughts back to Dave.
Scott came over a half-hour before noon, looking calm and confident -- it pissed me off! It pissed me off even more to have him just sitting there, smiling and laughing at me as I nervously paced the floor. He jumped in my path and shook me lightly by the biceps. "Jeff! Calm down! If he doesn't like you then he wasn't worth it in the first place. I don't think he'll be let down; I worry that you'll be let down." His hands slid comfortingly up and down my arms. "Just breathe. Don't worry, I'll be there with you the whole time." Did he have to remind me?! "Let's go get some fresh air while we wait."
"Good idea." We went out onto the veranda and slowly rocked on the porch swing. I hadn't been able to eat much last night and I haven't had anything all morning, but I still didn't feel hungry.
It suddenly struck me that Scott hadn't commented on my birthday! He surely didn't forget!
"Oh my God." My mouth dropped as a brand new, shiny black Mercedes E-class sport utility pulled into my driveway.
Scott poked me with his elbow, "You're one lucky fag, you know that?" We stood and walked over to his purring vehicle.
"Happy birthday, hop in!" I took shotgun, Scott in the back. I got a clear view of Dave. My eyes felt like they were going to come out of their sockets. The car, the driver, the situation, ... all too good to be true. I prayed that this wasn't all a dream, that I wouldn't wake up in five minutes hearing my alarm. I just couldn't take that.
Scott and Dave exchanged handshakes and nice-to-meet-you's. He was wearing Doc Marten sandals, loose-fitting tan shorts, Oakley E-wires, a Phish hat, a thick hemp necklace, and a blue and white striped shirt which gently fell across his chest accentuating his muscle definition.
A small groan of pleasure escaped my lips.
I got a gust of reality and the first thing I thought was "Oh, shit! Did I just cum in my jeans?" Well, I hadn't, but just looking at him was more intense and pleasurable than some of my jerk off sessions! Usually there's clean up after feeling this good.
He reached for my hand, his hands were large and his grip was powerful. With his free hand he removed his sunglasses, exposing his incredible eyes. It seemed that somehow, he'd taught them how to smile. His teeth were perfect, his hair looked blonder than NetMeeting let me know, and he had a cute dimple that I wanted to touch. I saw a slight, quick bounce to his eyebrows and he released his grip.
I gnawed on my lower lip as he placed his hand on the back of my headrest as he reversed out of the driveway. How was I going to be able to act natural? Dave looked me over as he turned back to the road, commenting "Hey, nice shirt."
"Thanks."
A voice came from the backseat, "See, it paid off to try on 10 different things." Scott's words stabbed into my gut. I gritted my teeth and closed my eyes. Must keep cool. "But knowing Jeff, he'll have his clothes off before we get out of the neighborhood. Besides, Dave, in his mind, you're already naked." I felt sick. I turned and glared at Scott, who just chuckled to himself.
Dave smiled, "If you wanted to kill someone by throwing them out of a moving car, how fast do you have to go?"
I laughed devilishly, "Let's try some experiments." I turned to Scott, "Scott goes first, I get to throw him!" Scott just smiled back.
We drove out of my housing development. I asked, "So which Baskin Robbins are we going to?"
"The one across from the university. It's the closest, right?"
"Yeah." Ok, so it was a stupid question. The other location was half-way across town.
"So, have you got any plans for college?"
"Uh, I'm not too sure, I've been looking at a few on the East Coast, but I doubt I'll get into any of those. I'll probably just end up staying in town. But I don't want to live with my parents."
"Are you going to rush a fraternity?"
"I'm not sure if those are the type of people I want to be around."
"I was in a fraternity." Open mouth, insert foot. "It was a lot of fun. Lotsa hot guys. And I ended up seeing many of them naked."
Scott said, "Jeff's too faggy for them, he--"
Dave interrupted, "No, he's not."
Scott continued, "He'd be hard all the time, though. It wouldn't take long before they'd catch on."
The store was coming up on our right. Dave laughed, "I got turned on a lot and no one caught on, well, except for the couple guys I fooled around with."
Scott shook his head, "You don't seem like a fag at all. It's just weird to hear someone like you say something like that ... and not be joking."
Dave pulled into a space and turned to the backseat. "I hate to burst your bubble, but there are a lot more gay people than you're able to spot."
Scott responded, "So how do you find other guys if you can't spot them?"
"I didn't say that I couldn't spot them. I said that you couldn't. You've never heard of Gaydar?"
"Yeah, but everyone can use that to spot all the flamers."
"Scott, everyone can spot flamers without Gaydar. It's for all the ones that you can't spot ..."
He responded sarcastically, unbelieving. "So, what's it like then? Bells and whistles? Flashing lights?"
"You just know."
We slid out of the soft leather seats and went into the store, Dave held the door for both Scott and me. As we walked past a table of two attractive men, they nodded to Dave and said, "Hey, how's it going?"
We kept walking, I asked, "Oh, friends of yours?"
"Nope, they're gay."
Scott turned back around to look again, shocked. "How do you know?"
Dave smiled, "You just know. That's what I'm talking about." I felt a little naive. I couldn't tell they were gay. Why didn't my Gaydar work?
We all got cups. Scott ordered plain vanilla, I got some strawberry, Dave got `Mi Cherrie Amore' which looked pretty good. As Dave pulled out his wallet, I was in awe: it was made entirely out of duct tape! "Hey, cool wallet!"
"You like that?"
I nodded, but I was even more impressed by the bills that were inside, he easily had well over $100 on him.
Dave suggested we eat over on the quad on campus, so we walked across the street, found a shady area on the grass and sat down. Dave turned to Scott, "You don't get bored with plain vanilla?"
"No, it's good. I always get vanilla."
"Don't you like mine better?"
"Never tried it. Can I have some?" Dave pulled his cup away from Scott's approaching spoon.
"No, you can't."
Scott laughed, "How am I supposed to tell you which is better if I've never tried what you have?"
Dave got serious and cocked his head, "That's a damn good question." Scott jerked back, suddenly realizing that he'd be lured into a trap. Dave turned to me and we started talking. I was thankful he'd left his sunglasses in the car because we had some incredible eye contact. Dave and I quickly became completely comfortable with one another, we seemed to have the same sense of humor. Every once in a while, I would look over at Scott who just sat there watching, looking disgusted or possibly angry. He hadn't said a word since Dave's comment.
Before I knew it, I had made some comment about frequent masturbation and he asked, "So how frequent is `frequent'?"
I laughed, "Lemme just say this. With all the cum I've washed down the drain, I wouldn't be surprised to go to the ocean and see a whole school of fish that look just like me."
Dave laughed for a while then we just sat there, staring at each other. My body started tingling. The hairs on the back of my neck were standing straight up. After a moment of silence, he said very sincerely, "You're really cute, you know that?"
Scott jumped to his feet in a fury. "That's it! I've had enough! I thought I could handle this, but I can't. I'm leaving. You two have a fucking blast." He stormed off.
Dave appeared shocked at my lack of concern. "Should you go after him?"
"No, he'll be fine. I just don't understand what's wrong with him."
Dave laughed, "You're kidding, right? That boy is in love with you."
"That's crazy! You are really, really off. He's been getting like this a lot."
"Like when? When you're with other guys? When you're talking about other guys?"
"No, he got like this when--" I sat there and remembered all the recent times that he had gotten upset like this. They all had involved Dave or Ben. "He's probably just worried that if I get a boyfriend that I wouldn't be spending as much time with him."
"Exactly!" I just sat there, shaking my head in denial, thoughts racing wildly around my head. "He's jealous. Jeff, you've spent so much time convincing yourself that he's straight, you've been missing all the clues."
"But he is straight!"
He laughed, "Stop it! Jeff, wake up."
"I don't get it then. Why wouldn't he tell me?"
"He hasn't even admitted it to himself yet. But you'll know as soon as he figures it out."
"I don't know, I'm still having a difficult time believing all of this."
"Why don't we walk around a bit, tell me more about you two." We collected Scott's half-eaten ice cream and our trash. For the next couple of hours we walked all over the campus and as I told him about all of the recent events, I saw it all in a new light. Maybe Dave was right. Maybe Scott was--was like me. But then I realized that it might be my subconscious that was so ready to accept this news, my own hopes clouding my perspective. I didn't know what to believe. He said, "It sounds like there isn't anyone who knows you better than he does." We were now back at his car, he unlocked my door and held it for me. "Friends like him are once in a lifetime."
I thought for a second. "Yeah, he is special." He drove in silence back to my house. He must've known that I just needed time to think. We pulled into my driveway. I said, "My parents are gone, you can come inside."
"Maybe for a little while."
We went inside. "You wanna see my room? It's kind of a mess--" He followed me up the stairs and into my room. "Well this is it." I turned around, my arms opened as if I were presenting it to him.
He was right behind me and as I was completing my turn, I felt his hand on the small of my back, pulling me gently next to him. "I don't want to complicate things for you, but I really like you ... I'd like to get to know you better."
I smiled and raised an eyebrow. "You're pretty cool yourself..."
"But as soon as Scott figures things out, I'll step aside. I don't want to come between you two."
"Well then, I kinda hope he doesn't figure things out."
"Me too." He leaned in and gently placed his lips on mine. I kissed back, our mouths opening wider and wider. His hand started gliding along my spine while his other hand met my hip, the fingertips on my buttock. My arms were in-between our bodies and I placed my hands on his chest. His body was so firm and powerful. My hands traced under his arms around to his back where I felt all the muscular ridges. Oh, God, he felt good! I was actually quite surprised with how absolutely incredible it was to just play on his lips, but my tongue started to get jealous and wanted in on the action. We slowly phased our tongues into the kissing, mmm ... `Mi Cherrie Amore.' He moved his lips to the nape of my neck. I leaned my head back in pleasure and to allow him more surface area. His hands came around to my chest and slowly twisted and pulled on my nipples, it drove me wild! My ear was his next area of attack; he nibbled on the lobe and then inserted his tongue. Wow! I always thought it would be disgusting to have someone's slobbery tongue stuffed in my ear, but I could only gasp for breath in perfect gratification.
His hands slipped down my chest and snatched the sides of my shirt, pulling it up and off, he pitched it in the corner. He slowly walked us over to my bed. I pulled his shirt off and ... wow, I just couldn't get over how hot he was! I lost balance and sat back down on the edge of the bed. He sat and started kissing me again. Before I knew it, I was laying on my back. Dave was propped up on his arms and casually moved his mouth down to my nipples. Soft nibbles, sucking, licking, ... I arched my back and threw my head back in delight. "Oh, Dave--"
I put my hand on his back and felt his muscles tense and relax as he raised and lowered. Very smoothly I slid my hand up to his head, playing with the length of his hair, getting it wrapped around my fingers. He placed kisses along my stomach as he made his descent. He looked up at me as he placed his hands on the button to my jeans, checking my response. I smiled, he winked. He undid my button and zipper, peeling the flaps back to get to my banana. He kissed the skin just above the band to my boxers, his chin making contact with my covered throbbing erection. His hands moved confidently to my waistband and pulled it out and over my hard, throbbing friend. His beautiful eyes gazed hungrily at my member. My waistband was under my sack, holding my balls out. Dave's soft lips wrapped around each testicle, sucking them into his mouth one at a time. He held my rod straight out and licked his way up to the top where he found some pre-cum. "Oh, Jeff! Is this for me? It's your birthday, you didn't have to get me anything!" He smiled and placed his lips on the top so that they just covered the tip. His tongue swirled around in my precum. Slowly, his mouth accepted more and more of my cock until I was almost completely in his mouth. He was incredible! I'd had only that one blow job before this and that guy, for the most part, liked women. But now, here's Dave, a master at what he does. You could actually see it in his eyes that he was really enjoying his work. My hands were touching every part of him I could reach. His smooth, tanned chest and back. His powerful arms were simultaneously beautiful to watch and intimidating. Why would Dave ever like someone like me? OH! I was down his throat! Wow! What was I saying? Fuck it. His head twisted and turned as he bobbed on my knob.
I rubbed his deltoids, "Whoa, whoa, I'm getting close."
He looked up at me and his eyes just smiled. His motions became more and more vigorous. Oh, oh, ... I could feel the edge approaching. My shaft got completely rock hard and my body jumped off my bed as I forced a load of hot cum down his throat. Here comes another! My world seemed to disappear for a few moments. My consciousness left the room for a moment or two and when it came back it was happy with what it found. Dave still had my cock in his mouth, his hands were caressing my stomach and chest. He pulled off and held my cock out, cum dripping down the side. He licked from the base to the top, getting every last drop. I winced as his tongue brushed the ridge of the head.
"Wow, thanks Dave."
My bedroom door opened! It was Scott!
Dave instantly pulled off me. I sat up, quickly closing my jeans. My arms trying to cover my chest. Even though I had most of my clothes on, I somehow felt completely naked.
Scott's hand smacked against his chest as if he'd just been shot, all of his air came out in one quick rush. His head slowly shook from side to side and just above a whisper, he said, "Sorry--" He turned and ran down the stairs and slammed the back door.
Dave stood quickly and went to the corner to get my shirt. He sounded apologetic, "I should go, you need to go talk to Scott." In the sea of dirty shirts on the floor, he had a problem locating mine. "We'll go out again, soon I hope!" He smiled and found my shirt. On his way back up, the shirt brushed the pictures from the game and they fell to the floor. He tossed me the shirt and knelt to pick up the photos. He stared at the top one, then quickly flipped through several more. "That's Ben. How do you know Ben?"
"That's the hot football player jock I told you about. How do you know him?"
"Ben's my brother."
My mind didn't process immediately.
"What?! You're Ben's brother?! No way!"
"Yeah, small world. I told you my younger brother was hot ... but I guess you already knew that."
"Wow, yeah, Ben's pretty cool. He's gonna come look at the pictures today around--" I turned to look at the clock. It read `3:15.' I suddenly got very worried. "--around 3 ..."
"Shit, I've gotta get out of here!" We threw on our shirts and we rushed down the staircase and right as we hit the bottom ...
DING-DONG<
We stopped all motion. I whispered, "You could hide in the basement. He won't be here long."
"It's no use, he's already seen my car! We'll just have to face him. We wiped our mouths and I reached up and fixed Dave's hair. "I have an idea. Act surprised that Ben and I know each other."
I pulled the door open. Ben looked confused.
"Hey, Ben, come on in."
"Dave, why are you here?"
I said, "Oh! You guys know each other?"
Dave came over, "Yeah, this is my annoying little brother! Oh, so you guys go to school together, I should've figured."
Ben repeated, "But why are you here?"
Dave answered calmly, "Oh, uh, Jeff -- that's your name, right? -- he locked his keys in his car over at Food-4-Less and I tried to help him get in, but when I found out he had a spare at home and that he lived close, I just brought him here to get them."
"Do you want me to drive him back to his car? Or, did you already go get it?"
I knew that he couldn't drive me to a car that wasn't out there, so I responded, "It's in the garage."
Ben still looked doubtful, "So Dave, this is the second time back at his house? After you got his keys the first time, why would you need to come back?"
Ooo, good question!
Dave cleared his throat, "Because I'd forgotten my wallet over here. But I have it now." He patted his back pocket.
"Why would you have your wallet out?"
"What is this, 3rd degree? Jeff hadn't ever seen a duct tape wallet before."
Ben let out an unconvinced "uh-huh." Then he added, "Alright, well, whatever."
Dave moved for the door, "Later, bro."
Ben said, "See ya, Dave."
I called out as he walked to his car, "Hey thanks for everything you did today." He smiled and got in his car. I closed the door. "That's quite a coincidence that it was your brother that helped me. Small world."
"Yeah--"
"So, those pictures! Wait here, I'll be right back." I ran upstairs, took my first breath in the past couple minutes, and ran back downstairs. I showed him the best ones last.
He glanced at me, "So -- really -- how do you know my brother?"
"What? We told you." My face got warm.
"I don't believe a word of that shit. Look, I know about my brother."
"Uh, you know what about your brother?"
"The same thing that I know about you ... Got it?" My face started to burn and I got light-headed. "Hey, I'm cool with it. It's your life, your choices. Who am I to make your decisions? You weren't too hard to figure out. The other day in the locker room, the way you were checking everyone out, the way you were looking at me--" I couldn't breathe. "Sit down, bud. You look like you're about to pass out."
My face was sweaty and I lost all sensation in my legs. "No, don't worry, I'm fi--"
I blacked out.
I don't know how long I was out, but I woke up with cold water all over my face and a pounding headache. I was on the couch in the front room. Ben was sitting on the couch with me, at my waist level.
"Jeff, Jeff, how many fingers?"
"Uh, four?"
He gritted his teeth, "Eh, close enough. You alright?"
"Yeah, what happened?"
"Here." He held a cold wet towel against my forehead. "You passed out and hit your head on the banister. Then I brought you in here. You've been out for maybe a minute, any longer and I was going to call an ambulance." He ran his fingers through my hair, "You'll have a nasty bump right--" They reached the back of my head and pain shot through my entire body. "--here!"
"Ouch!!" I repositioned, "Thanks, Ben."
"No problem." Ben laughed and patted my chest. "So how long have you been dating my brother?"
I was completely quiet. I tried thinking of all these excuses but none made any sense.
"Jeff, I'm not going to tell any one. Don't worry. So, how long?"
I didn't feel comfortable but answered anyway, "I just met him for the first time in person today."
"Really? That's ironic." He flipped over the wet rag. "You could probably use some food." He got up and went into the kitchen. I heard some dishes clinking in the refrigerator, then the microwave. He came back, "I'm no chef, you're only getting some reheated macaroni." He also had a glass of a mixed fruit drink.
"Thanks, you didn't have to."
"But I did, and you have to eat it." He smiled and grabbed another pillow and stuffed it behind my back and head. He sat back down right where he was before. I went to take the bowl from him but he resisted, "No, no. Sit back, we don't want you overexerting yourself in your weakened state. Open up. Here comes the airplane!" He made propeller noises as I laughed at him. He fed me several forkfuls, each time I couldn't help but laugh at him. As he was bringing the next forkful he laughed a little too and a noodle dropped off onto my chest right before entering my mouth. "Oh no! We have casualties! He grabbed the noodle off my chest. As his fingers pinched the noodle, they grabbed some of the skin under my shirt as well. It got me excited. He held the noodle above my mouth. "Open up!"
I did as I was told and he released the macaroni into my mouth. That was the best piece of poorly processed pasta with powdered cheese I've ever tasted.
I savored every chew.
He got the glass of the fruit drink and held it to my lips, he lifted it faster than I could drink and some juice trickled out of the sides down my face. He took the glass away. "Uh-oh, sorry bud." He took the rag off my forehead and wiped me down. He smiled and stuffed the towel in my mouth, checked his watch and stood up. "Hey man, I've gotta get going. I have to be somewhere soon."
I removed the rag, "That's too bad."
He tried sounding official, "Get plenty of rest, keep your head elevated, and put an icepack on that bump." I went to stand up. "No, no. You stay there. I can let myself out."
"Okay, hey, Ben. Thanks again."
He made his voice sound really cute, "Aww, it was nuffin." I looked him up and down and he knew it. "You just can't keep your eyes off me. I don't know whether to be flattered or frightened. Do I have to watch my back in dark alleys now?" We laughed. He opened the front door. "I'll see you later." He walked out, not even a second later, he opened the door again. "Oh, and Dave doesn't know that I know about him, so don't tell him, k? Bye!" He closed the door before I could ask how he could know about Dave if Dave never told him...
I fell asleep for a few hours. I woke up to the phone ringing. I reached over my head and grabbed the cordless sitting on the end table. I cleared my throat. "Hello?"
"Hey, Jeff. It's Dave. What happened after I left?"
"Oh, I just showed him the pictures and then he left."
"Man, that was crazy! He seemed so suspicious--"
"No shit."
"He didn't figure anything out though, did he?"
I thought ... who do I have more loyalty to? Finally, I said, "No, he doesn't know a damn thing."
"That's good. He'd just complicate everything."
I had an eerie feeling and I looked over at the chair, "Oh, God, Scott, you scared me! You asshole!" He was just sitting in the darkness, motionless.
Dave seemed suddenly downhearted, "Well, I'll let you go..."
"Sure, talk with you later." I clicked the phone off and turned to Scott. "How long have you been here?"
His voice was quiet and hoarse, "A few hours. I've just been watching you sleep."
I stared at him, unsure who should be apologizing for what happened today. "How're you doing?" I rubbed my eyes.
"I've settled down. Hold on a sec." He got up and went into the kitchen and when he came back with a Little Debbie snack cake with a lit candle in it. He brought it over and sang "Happy Birthday" for me. I hadn't ever heard his singing voice sound so good before, he seemed to be singing so sincerely. Our eyes never broke contact, but by the end of the song, tears had welled so I couldn't see him clearly anymore. "Make a wish." I blew the candle out and the room was dark again. "Do you want your gifts now?"
"You got me gifts?"
"Yeah, come on." The streetlight lit the front window curtain and I could see his silhouette holding out his hand. I reached for him. He led me upstairs to my room and turned on my desk lamp. "Ok, here." He pulled out a key from his pocket and sat on the bed.
I took it and sat next to him, "What is this? The key to your heart?"
He laughed a little, "No, you already have that. It's for your PO Box."
"My PO Box?"
"So you can pick up your subscription to XY and some catalogs I ordered for you. I was smart, I put them under a different name. You are now Gary Waltham. Since I only found out about your `dark side' a little bit ago, I didn't have time to get the first issues yet. I was gonna just go buy them at the store, but I just couldn't do it. So I just went and pulled out the subscription cards."
"Wow, that's so cool, Scott! That wasn't cheap either!"
"Oh, I marked `Bill Later' on them ... no, I'm just kidding. Ready for the other gift?"
"What? More?! Shit, Scott--"
"Well, remember the other day when I kept bugging you about what type of guys you like?"
"Yeah--"
"Well, you said you liked frat boys. So I found this web site that sells these tapes, a whole series." He clicked on my TV and started a tape. My TV sits on my dresser against the wall parallel to the side of my bed. The screen was black.
"Yeah? What is it?"
"Hold on ... I thought I had it queued up. I guess some gay guy convinced a fraternity house to jerk off on his home camera and he pays them commission. This tape is their fundraiser."
"No way!
"Since you like the `straight' type of guy, I figured it'd be perfect."
The tape started playing. "Oh, were we going to watch it?"
"What, don't you like it? You don't want to watch it?"
"No, it's great! But you want to watch it?"
He seemed a little defensive, "They're straight! So it's not like we're going to be watching two fags blowing each other." He paused, "I've already seen that one-too-many times today--" He smiled weakly.
I laid down on my side, watching the screen as hot young men milked their cocks. Scott laid down behind me and put his hand on my arm. At first I was a little startled, but immediately thereafter it felt perfectly natural. He slid his hand down onto my abdomen. I put my hands on top of his.
He leaned over and talked quietly, "Happy birthday, Jeff. What did you wish for?"
"I didn't make a wish. After all the shit I put your through, you're still my friend. What else would I wish for?"
-- http://gts.netwhizz.nu/