Before I get into the story, let's get the legal stuff out of the way. I am above the age of 18 at the time of writing this story. I own all rights to this story. Any likeness in name or actions to any of the characters in this story with someone in real life are purely coincidental. If it is illegal for you to read/view something like this in your area, you should leave now. This story includes scenes of male/male sex with high school aged men. If this is considered offensive, you should, once again, leave. If nothing else, then read my excerpt, and enjoy.
This is the second chapter of Secret Admirer. I am sorry that it took longer than expected to write. There was a death in my family that hit me very hard, so I had a little trouble finishing this part. I am beginning work on the next part, but I would like to hear your reactions to this segment. Please feel free to email me with any and all suggestions. I hope you don't mind, but I am getting ready to start throwing some curveballs. Some of you are guessing at the plot of the story, and I am going to do my best to make everything a surprise. This segment does not include much sex, but there is a very brief masturbation scene. Anyway, I will let you read it, and please tell me what you think. I love to hear from you all.
Secret Admirer 2-Confusion
I was sitting in class listening to Mr. Smith rant on about finding the first derivative of a function. Well, I wasn't really listening if we're being honest. I was sort of half-paying attention, half-thinking about the note that I had received.
I couldn't believe it. I, Nathanial Audine Quincy, had received a letter from a secret admirer. The boy who thought his life was so terrible that he needed to kill himself had a secret admirer. I was so distracted by my thoughts that I didn't hear the door open. I also didn't hear Mr. Smith talking, until he said the magic words.
"...New student. So class, let's welcome him." At this, my eyes shot up. Fresh meat? It has been so long since we had a new student. I couldn't wait to find out all the gossip.
I don't know how I scanned the room for so long before actually seeing him. Why didn't it dawn on me that he would be standing next to Mr. Smith? Even if I am embarrassed to say it, I didn't figure out where he was by myself. All I heard was Mr. Smith call my name as I was still looking around the room.
"Nathan, are you paying attention?"
"Yes?" It sounded like more of a question than an answer, but it was the best I could do. I was slightly confused as to where the new student was.
"Well, as I was saying, the office says that Kellen and you have the same schedule, so they want you to show him around for the day, and get him acquainted with the school."
"Who?"
"Nathan, you have not been listening to me at all today! This is Kellen Masterson. He is a new student, and you are going to be showing him around. Are we clear?"
I finally got a look at the boy standing next to Mr. Smith. I felt a very sudden stirring in my crotch. This boy was turning me on. And for good reason too. He was gorgeous! Absolutely gorgeous.
He stood probably about 5 foot 9, with black, curly hair that reached just to the bottom of his ears. His ears were pierced, which was something that never really did much for me on a guy, except for on him. Seeing the diamond studs in his ears drove me a little crazy. His eyes looked dark, but I could tell they weren't brown. They had to be a dark blue or green, maybe even a dark hazel. I let my eyes travel up and down his body, and quickly gathered that he kept his self in very good shape. His purple V-neck shirt nicely showed his defined chest muscles with the sleeves hugging nicely to his muscular arms and tapered to his sides in a very flattering manner. He had on black skinny jeans, which hugged his legs nicely, and did nothing to hide the rather nice looking prize held behind the zipper. I didn't to much care for his purple Vans shoes, they were the chunky skater type, which I deemed "Fat Feet Shoes", but they suited his outfit nicely. All in all, he was a beautiful specimen, and I simply had to know more about him.
"Nathan! Pay attention!" Mr. Smith's voice snapped me out of my stare.
"Huh?" Damn, I was really able to muster up all the right words when I needed them. I looked over to the new student. He had a smile on his face. I could feel myself drifting again.
"Kellen? You will be showing him around? Are we finally clear?" Mr. Smith asked.
"Sure. Yeah, that's fine." Finally I was able to come up with more than one word.
"Well, Mr. Quincy, being that you have already mentally checked out, why don't you go ahead and get a head start with showing Mr. Masterson, here, around?"
"I guess."
"First though, Mr. Masterson, as is customary in my classroom, we need a proper introduction."
"Alright," an accent even more southern than my own! I loved it. "Well, we, my daddy, brother, and me, just moved to Georgia from Kentucky. It's definitely different here. Don't y'all got no chickens?" Oh holy hell, he is uneducated. This won't do, this won't do at all. "I'm just kidding. I just figured I would play up all the stares I am getting right now for my accent."
That roused a bit of laughter from the class. Mr. Smith spoke next. "Well, why don't you tell us a little bit more about yourself. Then, Nathan can give you the grand tour."
"Well, like I said, we just moved. Daddy and momma divorced, for, uh, reasons, and since we are both old enough, Patrick, my twin, and I decided to come with daddy. Let's see here, I play guitar and the drums," oh, so talented, "I played football and wrestled at my old school, I dabbled in gymnastics in a private gym in my hometown," he blushed and scratched the back of his head after that one. "And I reckon that's about it."
"Well, it's a pleasure having you here in Georgia. Nathan, why don't you..." Kellen cut him off as he began to say something else.
"Oh, and one more thing, I'm gay. I just wanted to get it out there, so I don't have any problems with anybody."
I checked my card over again before standing up, BINGO! I mean I had literally just hit the jackpot. Gorgeous, seems to have a sense of humor, amazing country accent, and, once again, gorgeous, and to top all that off, gay? Someone up stairs is really looking out for me.
"Alright, Nathan, go show Kellen the school." Mr. Smith stated, signaling the end of Kellen's spill.
I stood up and collected my books. As I was reaching back down to grab my pencil off my desk, I made eye contact with Talan. He gave me a wink and a smile as he nodded towards Kellen. I blushed slightly and picked up my pencil.
"I'll see you at lunch T." I said before making my way to the front of the class.
"Alrighty, Natty. See you then."
With that, I was out the door, with Kellen close on my heels.
As soon as we were out of ear shot of the door, Kellen grabbed a hold of my shoulder. I turned around to see what he wanted.
"Well, now that you are no longer making an ass out of yourself by not being able to form complete sentences, allow me to introduce myself properly. My name is Kellen Iduh Masterson, and I'm pleased to meet ya," Kellen said with an outstretched hand.
I grabbed his hand, and shook it. "I'm pleased to meet you as well. My name Is Nathanial Audine Quincy, but you can call me Nate."
"Not Natty? I kinda liked that one." he replied with a smirk.
"No, not Natty. Only my best friend calls me that." I responded.
"Okay, Nate it is. So, tell me about yourself. I already had one of those dreaded office aides give me a tour. I'm ready to start making friends."
I was a little taken back by his bluntness, but I decided I would tell him a little about myself, However, only things that were public knowledge were going to be shared.
"Uh, well, there's not really much to tell. I'm in all AP classes, I play 3 varsity sports, I'm student council vice-president..."
"You plan on majoring in oncology when you start college, you have one older brother, and your favorite band is The Summer Set," he cut me off. What was this guy? A stalker? "I mean tell me something that isn't in your `about me' on your facebook."
"So, what? You're facebook stalking me already?" I was thoroughly creeped out.
"No, relax, the office aide, Brian something, showed me your profile so I would know what to expect. Sorry if I creeped you out. I just wanted to actually get to know you. I figured a stud like you would be a powerful ally in making friends around this place."
Stud? Was he coming onto me? "Uh, I mean, like..."
"I'm not coming onto you or anything, I just really wanna make some friends around here. I definitely wasn't Mr. Popular at my other school, and I just wanted to do things a little differently here. Kinda start over. Ya know?"
He wasn't coming on to me? Well, my ego just deflated a little bit. "Oh, well in that case, I'd be more than happy to lend my services." I put my arm over his shoulder and continued, "Let me take you under my wing. I am not necessarily Mr. popular around these parts, but I am also not some dweeb. I think I can definitely help you out in the friend area."
"Don't sale yourself short. Brian essentially said you were all that and a bag of chips."
"People still use that line?"
"Oh, you know what I mean. He said you are the shit around these parts, and he told me if I made it in good with you and your friends, I would be solid."
"Okay, I guess I am pretty modest. Anyway, some things that you are going to want to avoid here are stuff like camo and country music. We may live in Georgia, but this school is pretty anti-country. Accents are acceptable," I blushed as I said that, "but everything else country is a no go. That being said, a sure fire way to get in with the `popular' crowd is to participate in one of four sports: football, baseball, basketball, or cheerleading. Do any of those?"
"Well, I played football, I was QB at my old school, and I did some gymnastics, so I might be good at cheering."
"Well, both of those sports are already in session for this year, so you will just have to wait until next semester, when our school's All-Star cheerleading squad has its tryouts. But let me tell you something, just because you `did some gymnastics' doesn't mean that you have what it takes to be on ours or any cheerleading squad."
He backed out of my arm and threw his hands up in defense. " I didn't mean to upset you. Geez, don't jump down my throat about the cheerleading comment."
"I'm sorry. I just get real tired of people thinking it's not a real sport that requires athleticism and skill."
"I know it's not easy. I didn't mean for it to sound like that. I was just sorta talking without thinking. So I guess I will just stick to football."
"Speaking of that. You weren't popular even though you were quarterback?"
"Yeah, well, everyone knew about my...um...lifestyle, and no one back home agreed with it. So while I was damn good at what I did, I didn't get the recognition I deserved."
"Well," I put my arm back around his shoulder and started walking with him again, "I personally don't have a problem with how you were born, so you don't have to worry about me. I will have your back. However, this whole popular thing...We have to work on it. I think that you might be like Brad Sterno. He is one of my best friends, but he is extremely uncoordinated. He rose to popularity through student government, not sports. It's not often that a junior is student body president. That might just be the route we go. For now, we will just get to be good friends, and, through association, you will be good friends with my friends. However, I do have a past. My friends aren't going to let me forget it either, so they aren't really to keen on me spending time with new people. I don't really understand their logic, but I can never win that argument, so I always let it go."
"I'm a little confused. What are they guarding you for?"
I hesitated. I wasn't sure or not if I should tell him. I looked into his eyes. He seemed honest. I didn't really know him, but I felt like I could trust him. "Okay, well, first off let's start with a little threat. No one, besides my closest friends, knows what happened, and even then, only Talan knows all, well almost all, of the details. None of them would ever betray my trust, so if this ever leaks, I will know it was you. That will not only be an end to your attempt at popularity, but it will also be an end to any chance at a life you would have here. Do we have an understanding?"
He looked scared. "Yeah, I will take it to my grave. Honest."
"Okay, well I tried, about a month ago, to commit suicide. Don't ask for the details because I don't know you enough to give them. However, my friends are afraid that the wrong person will lead me down that path again, or so they say, and that is why I am so guarded by them. That being said, Talan is the one you are going to have to win over first. He is my best friend, and if he likes you, the others are sure to follow."
He just stared at me for a minute, then a look appeared on his face. It almost looked like he connected with me on something. He just kept staring at me like that without saying anything. Gorgeous or not, I was getting creeped out by him, again, and I was starting to wonder about our chances at actually being friends if he was going to continually creep me out. "Why are you staring at me like that?" I asked him as I pulled my arm off his shoulder.
"Well, its just...err...what you said. The suicide thing..." he stopped.
"What about it?"
"Well, the reason why Patrick and I decided to go with daddy is because momma didn't want both of us. She only wanted Pat. He refused to live with her without me, so we went with daddy."
"Why did she only want Patrick?"
He began to tear up. "Well, I told Patrick when we were 14 that I was gay. He told me he already knew, playing it off as the twin esp, and he was really supportive. I told my daddy about a year later, and once again, he was really supportive. `I always hoped I would have a gay son. That way I don't have to worry about grandchildren before I want them.' That is what he always tells me and his friends. He is actually proud of the fact that I'm gay. Probably loves me more for it. I was most terrified to tell momma.
"Momma was never the type to associate with gay people. She was always getting mad at my dad when he would have his gay friends over, or when he went out with them. She would never let Pat and me watch anything that had any sort of gay acts or references in it. However, I knew, I just knew, that she was going to change once I told her that I, her oldest son by three minutes, was gay. I was wrong." He started crying. I pulled him into one of the vacant classrooms so he could finish his story without getting embarrassed due to crying.
"I still remember the day I told her. It was about three weeks after my 16th birthday. I told Patrick about this guy that I really liked, and, well, momma heard me mention his name. She went into one of her rants."
"Kellen, that Jacob boy is no one that you need to be hanging around with. I do not want him to have any influence over you!" Mrs. Masterson stated.
"Momma, what do you mean? He is nice enough. I wouldn't consider him a bad influence." Kellen said.
"Kellen, that boy is a homosexual. He is a sin against nature, and a stain on the fabric of humanity. I do not want him corrupting you."
"Momma, gay isn't a disease. You are either born gay or straight. You can't catch it through contact."
"Kellen, you are not born gay! It is a choice. Where have you been getting ideas like this? I will throw that blasted television and computer out the damn window!" She was angry.
"Well, daddy has been telling me these things. And some of daddy's friends as well."
"What? Now I have to worry about my own husband corrupting my babies? He will not brainwash you into believing what is not the truth. I will take you to the church right now, and get you some facts about homosexuality. IT IS A SIN!"
"Well, momma, so is judging other people. And the bible even says that no one sin is worse than another. So I guess that makes you just as bad as the homosexuals." Patrick stated.
"What the hell has gotten into you two? Why are you talking to me like this?" Mrs. Masterson demanded.
"Momma, I'm gay," Kellen started, "and I'm not any different than I have always been."
Mrs. Masterson just looked at her oldest son for a minute. She wasn't sure what to say. Then a look of disgust flashed across her face. She walked over to her son and punched him right in the face. When he crumpled to the ground, she threw herself on him, and began to pound him mercilessly. "I'm gonna beat the devil outta you! You are NOT going to be some FAGGOT! I will not have that in my house!"
Patrick attempted to pull her off Kellen, but she elbowed him in the face, knocking him out cold. She then returned to beating Kellen.
"What the fuck are you doing to my sons?!" Fynn Masterson, Kellen and Patrick's father, screamed as he entered the room after arriving home from work.
"Well, if you would like to know, I am beating the gay out of this one. He told me he was gay, and I CANNOT have that! I won't allow him to be gay. However, I am getting tired. Would you finish up while I get Father Flannigan on the phone?"
"Excuse me? Did you just ask me to finish beating our son so you could call a priest? Have you lost your fucking mind? Get off of my child!" Fynn pulled Mrs. Masterson off of Kellen and threw her to the floor.
Fynn was a large, very muscular man, and he towered over almost everyone. He leaned down to check his children's conditions. He was infuriated. Even more so by what happened next.
"Move out of the way Fynn, I'm not done just yet." Mrs. Masterson tried to move him out of the way. When she failed, she simply reached her foot around and kicked Kellen in the head, knocking him out just like his brother.
Fynn jumped up, grabbed his wife by the arms, and pinned her against the wall. "If you ever, and I mean ever, touch one of my children again, so help me god I will kill you! Do you understand me? These are my children damnit! I will not allow them to be harmed by anyone, let alone there own damn mother!"
"Fynn, you're hurting me! Kellen is gay. We have to do something to change that! Do you not understand that?"
"I have known for a while that Kellen is gay, and there is nothing we can do to change that! I do not even want to consider changing it. I love my sons just the way they are. I wouldn't change a thing about them!"
"You are kidding. He is an abomination in the eyes of God!"
"Unless you care to ask God himself about his personal opinion, I suggest you keep quiet with the slurs towards our...my child. Do I make myself clear?" She simply nodded. "I am going to let you go and you are going to stay here. Do you understand?" She nodded once again.
Fynn released her and walked back to his children. He picked Patrick up first, and threw him over his shoulder. He then went to Kellen and picked him up. He carried him cradle like in his arms out the front door. His judgment was clouded, and the tears that were starting to fall from his eyes confused him. He couldn't remember that he had parked his car in the garage. He was standing in the driveway holding his children and crying, when his neighbor came rushing towards him. She was on her cell phone with 911, and looked panicked when she saw the boys in their condition. She was babbling to the dispatcher, and Fynn heard her ask for an ambulance.
The tears were steadily flowing out of both of our eyes as he continued his story,
"Momma was arrested that night, but when Pat and I came to, we talked about it, and decided that we didn't wanna press charges against her. Daddy didn't like our decision, but he went along with it for our sake. Daddy filed for divorce, and, because of the special circumstances of the case, he was granted his divorce with no sharing of assets and full custody of Patrick and me. Even though the court said that we would be able to choose who we wanted to go with, Daddy still had the only say in things involving us, such as school, hospitals, stuff of that nature."
I acted without thinking, and I couldn't stop myself when I realized what I was doing. I went over to Kellen, and embraced him in a very tight hug. We were both crying, and I thought that was the end of his story. However, he continued after a minute of silent crying.
"I was really depressed after momma treated me the way she did, and any time she would call Pat, she would ask how the `faggot devil spawn' was and then hang up the phone. I missed my momma so much, I didn't quite know how to cope. I tried hanging myself, but Patrick found me right as I was about to step off the chair. He already had a knife in his hand, and when I saw him, I tried to hurry and jump, but he raced to me and cut the rope right as I stepped from the chair.
"That's why I was looking at you the way I was. I was surprised that we had something like that in common."
We stood there in our embrace, still crying, for about three or four more minutes, and then he decided to change the subject. "So, now that you know my story, tell me more about Talan, so I can start getting on his good side."
I released the embrace and wiped my eyes. I was smiling broadly, with red eyes, as I began. "Well, Talan is just about the best person anyone could ever meet in their life. No bullshit, but I wouldn't be alive today had it not been for him."
"Hmm, I like him already." he said laughing.
"Yeah, well let's see. He takes his sports very, very seriously. His favorite is basketball, although I don't know why, because he shines the most at football. Don't tell him I said that though. He would kill me for saying something like that. Anyway, his favorite type of music is alternative, or pop punk, and his favorite band is also The Summer Set. In fact, that is a pretty common fact among my friends, so you might want to look into that one. Anyway, he is absolutely in love with his car, and is constantly talking about it. In fact, the only thing he talks about more than his car is how much he loves his friends. So, if you wanna get on his good side initially, talk about how much you like his car, and then say something nice about his friends. That should get you in the door. Once there, you're on you own bud."
He was taking in everything I said, and when I finished, he just looked at me for a minute. He then began to talk. "So can I ask you a question?"
"Sure, bro. What is it?"
"How long have you been in love with Talan?"
I was completely dumbstruck by his question. How could he know? What had I done to tip him off? No matter, I had to steer him away from that. I quickly regained composure. "What the hell are you talking about man? I love Talan, but as a brother. You seem to have stuff a little confused."
"Mmm hmm, well I love Patrick as a brother too, but my eyes don't glaze over when I talk about him, and I don't look like a little girl who just got a pony when I look at him either."
"What the hell are you talking about? I am not in love with Talan."
"Are you sure?"
All I could think was `Who the hell does this guy think he is? It isn't any of his business who I do or don't love.' "Yes, I'm sure."
"Okay then, do you wanna go out with me Friday night?"
If my jaw could have hit the floor it would have. He just got done asking me if I loved the boy I love, and then he wanted to ask me out. "Uhh, dude, I'm not gay."
"Oh, neither am I. I just drool over guys like you were drooling over me this morning. But I'm totally straight."
Shit. This guy is like a fucking mind reader. "I was not dro-"
"Save it. I was looking at you the same way you were looking at me. And unless you are semi-hard all the time, I think we had the same effect on each other."
I blushed. I mean, what was I supposed to say. He knew, and what would be the use in denying it. If I told Talan about it, all he would do is convince me to go out with him. I was so wrapped up in thinking, that I didn't even know I was responding until I heard myself say it. "I guess we could. Where are we gonna go?"
He was beaming. His smile didn't quite make me melt like Talan's did, but it had an effect on me. "Not gay huh?"
"Just answer the question before I refuse."
"Well, I was thinking maybe a movie. Keep it pretty standard. Dinner before, hot sex afterwards. You know the deal."
It took me a minute to pop my eyes back in my head before I could respond. "Excuse me? I'll have you know that I am a virgin. I'm no cheap slut, and I'm definitely not a cheap date either. You can forget about the plan for me to help you become popular as well. I don't want to be friends with someone who thinks so little of me." I pushed passed him and was getting ready to exit the room.
"Hey," he said, grabbing my shoulder, "I was just playing. I didn't know that y'all took stuff so personal here. I'm just not real good at this whole asking people out thing, and I figured a little humor would help ease your nerves. I was just planning on dinner, a movie, and maybe some coffee or something' afterwards."
I blushed. I was super embarrassed about what I said. "Oh, I'm sorry. I am such an ass sometimes. Uhh...I guess that would be okay, but can I pick the movie. I don't really know what kinda movies you're into, but I am very particular about mine."
"Sure thing. I mean I wouldn't want my date to be unhappy. Anyway, are you really a virgin? Or were you just using that as an escape route?"
"No, I'm really a virgin. I have been so confused about my sexuality, that any time the opportunity presented itself, I was unable to perform."
"Dude, I totally respect that. A part of me wishes that I still was, but I can't change the past."
"Anyway, I would rather not talk about it. So, I guess I need your number now."
He was smiling again. "You've been dying to get my digits since you first saw me."
"I can always cancel. That's usually the only reason I get a number before a date anyway."
His face changed drastically. It looked llike he had just lost his best friend. "Ahh, really? I kinda don't wanna give you my number then..."
When he broke eye contact with me, and looked towards the floor, I busted out laughing. "Dude, I was just messing with ya! The look on your face though, priceless! That was payback for the sex remark!"
It was his turn to blush. "Oh, good one. So let me see your phone. I'll put my number in."
I handed him my phone, and he put his number in. We then walked out of the room, and I continued with his "tour" of the school. I found out that we actually had a lot more in common than I expected. However, I couldn't help but feel a little apprehensive about this whole situation. I mean, I barely know this guy, and he already knows I'm gay, and we are going out. Oh well, I agreed to it. Nothing I can do to change what I said. I am not one to back out of something, I never had been, and that wasn't going to change.
Just as we were beginning to walk down the English hall, the bell rang. I stopped in front of our classroom, and, while we waited for the previous class to file out, I explained to him how Mrs. Johnson's AP World Literature and Creative Writing class worked.
"Mrs. J is super strict. She doesn't let us talk, and we have a very strict daily regiment we have to follow. The thing that you better make sure you do is have your homework in on time. I'm sure she will explain everything else."
With that, I started to walk in the room. However, today instead of following the regiment, I walked to Mrs. Johnson's desk, with Kellen close behind.
"Mrs. J, we have a new student. This is Kellen Masterson. He just transferred here."
"Well, thank you for the introduction Nathan. Now, please get your regiment done; I will acquaint Mr. Masterson with the way this class works."
"Okay, Mrs. J." I was off to complete the daily regiment. I walked to the back, and got my graded papers and my journal out of my folder before heading to my desk. I sat down, copied the daily and homework assignments for the day, and started writing in my journal. Today was letter writing day, so I decided to write one to my dad. It was full of stuff that was just general family nonsense, but it got me the required word count, so I really didn't care.
I didn't even look up when Talan entered the room. In fact, had he not spoken aloud, I would not have known he was in there.
"Mrs. Johnson, Kellen Masterson is needed in the office." Talan said. Hearing that voice got my attention, and I looked up and saw his smiling face. It took me a minute to put two and two together, but I finally remembered that Talan was an office aide during second block, and that was why he was there to get Kellen. As he was turning to leave the room, he gave the a sort of hand type message that told me to check my phone. It was risky in Mrs. Johnson's class, but I was going to risk it for Talan. I would risk anything for him.
Talan: Dude, Kellen is in deep shit.
Me: Already? What did he do?
Talan: I don't know. All I know is that the police are here, and I heard someone saying something about his mom.
Me: Oh, he probably isn't in trouble then.
Talan: Huh? How do you know?
Me: He told me a bunch of stuff about his mom. If the police are here, they are probably trying to get a statement or something.
Talan: Oh, that's lame. I was hoping for some drama. This school is so damn boring. I was thinking about going to the bathroom and having a quick jo. Just to give me something to pass the time.
I got instantly hard after reading that.
Me: Haha, you do that shit in school?
Talan: Natty, I jack it wherever I feel like it. I mean, if I'm horny, I'm not just gonna let it stay hard. That wouldn't be a very nice thing to do. He's like my best friend.
Me: I thought I was your best friend. :'(
Talan: Oh shut up. You know what I meant. And besides, y'all have one thing in common.
Me: What could I possibly have in common with your junk? Haha
Talan: You're both HUMONGOUS dicks.
Me: Ha Ha Ha. I gotta go dude. Mrs. J is starting to look at me funny. See you in lunch.
Joining Talan at lunch, and passing around introductions for Kellen to those who had not met him yet, everything seemed normal. The conversation was flowing smoothly, and everyone seemed very receptive to Kellen. Everyone, except for Talan, the one person who needed to be receptive of him. At one point, I looked at him, and he looked genuinely angry. I motioned for him to get up, and we were getting ready to leave the lunch table.
"Guys, we've got some things we need to talk about for our Chemistry project with Carden. We'll see y'all later."
The groups responded with a unamious, "Laters."
We dumped our trash, and walked out of the lunchroom towards the science part of the building. We were walking in silence until Talan started speaking.
"So, what's the deal with Kellen?"
"Meaning?"
"Nathan, I know how you give tours. You know his life story by now. I don't get good vibes from him. What if he's a homophobe or something?"
"Umm, he already knows I'm gay. And... he's gay. Something tells me he's not a homophobe."
His look went from angry to hurt. "You already told him you were gay? I've known you for 11 years. We've been best friends for 11 years. It took you 11 years to tell me you were gay, and yet you tell him within an hour. What the fuck, Nathan?"
"T, what's wrong with you?" I was very confused. I didn't understand why he was acting the way he was.
"What's wrong with me?" He was getting angry again. "I'll tell you Nathanial"--he only used my full first name, or Nathan for that matter, when he was pissed-- "You don't trust me enough to tell me, and you meet him and tell him instantly. That fuckin' hurts dude. I thought we were tight. I guess not."
"First off, I didn't tell him. He figured it out. Second off, we are tight. Two people couldn't get tighter than us. You are my best friend, bro. Nothing is going to change that!"
"Well, you seem to be cozying up to Kellen. Looks like something is going to change our friendship." He looked down at the ground.
With tears in my eyes, I replied, "So, you're going to let something as small as this ruin an 11 year strong friendship? Really? We survive attempted suicide, but we can't survive someone FIGURING OUT that I'm gay. Maybe we aren't as tight as I thought we were. You know what? I'll just see ya around."
I turned around and began to cry as I started walking away from him. I couldn't believe that our friendship was over. I wasn't quite sure how to deal with it either. The only thing I could think to do was walk away and cry. That's what I did.
I walked straight to the end of the hall, through the double doors, and continued to walk until I got to the parking lot. I fumbled in my pocket for my keys, and pushed the button to unlock my doors. Since my attempted suicide, the school had standing orders to let me leave when I needed to, but to inform my father when I did. No sooner had I left the parking lot, my phone began to ring.
I answered without looking at the caller I.d. "Dad, I'm coming there. I need to talk to you."
"Natty, we need to talk about this." It was Talan.
"No, Talan. I would hate for you to regret you decision. I will just see ya around."
I hung up the phone and started driving towards my dad's office. When I got there, I parked in my usual spot, and headed straight for his corner office on the 9th floor. I needed someone to talk to, and since I didn't have Talan anymore, I would have to use my dad.
"Hey Martha, is my dad in?" I asked my dad's secretary as I walked up to her desk.
"Oh, Nathan honey, yes he's in. He is just getting into a meeting, but I'll page him anyway. Anything for you, babe." The middle-aged, stunning woman said with a smile. She picked her phone up, and pushed a button. "Adam, your son is here to see you." There was a pause while she listened to a response. "Alright, I'll let him know.
"Your father says to sit tight for a minute while he apologizes to his clients and reschedules their meetings. He has actually got me to clear his schedule for the day. You are pretty important nowadays kiddo. Your dad doesn't do this stuff for anybody. Not even your mom."
"Well, I guess certain things make you realize certain people's importance."
"That, or the fact that you are light of his life. When he isn't talking about your mother or work, its you kid. Nathan did this' and Nathan did that' and Nathan is so this' and Nathan is so that.' I'll tell ya kid, it's exhausting."
"I assure you Nathan, none of it is good." Adam, my father, said as he was stepping out of his office.
"Don't let this one fool ya. You make him beam kid. Never has a father loved their son more." Martha responded to his quip.
"Well, she has a point there son. Now get in here. Let's order us some take out. Don't tell mom." He laughed as he pulled me into his office.
Walking into his office, I looked at his desk. He had pictures a plenty of me and mom. He had one picture right next to his computer. It was Talan and me, when we were about 10 years old, holding the fish that we had caught after a fishing trip with our dads. I looked at the picture and was overcome with emotion. I started weeping.
"Whoa, buddy. What's wrong?" My dad asked as he embraced me. "Talk to me kid."
I stood there in my dad's arms for a few minutes trying to regain my composure. Once I was sure I would be able to talk with little to no tears, I began talking.
"Talan and I aren't friends anymore. He ended our friendship, and I just don't know what I'm going to do."
"Nathan, son, why would Talan end your friendship? This all just has to be some miscommunication."
"No, dad, he meant it. I could tell. He is so mad at me. I just don't understand."
"Well, buddy, let's sit down and talk this one through. Tell me exactly what happened."
"Okay, well I noticed something was up with him at lunch, so I motioned for him to take a walk with me. He started asking me questions about this new kid, Kellen. He was kicking it into protective mode, and said he was worried for me."
"Why was he worried over some new kid?"
"Well, he said that he was afraid that he was a homophobe..." I stopped talking after I realized what I said. I quickly looked away from my dad and down to the floor as I felt tears start to run down my cheeks.
My dad got up from his chair and crossed his office towards me. I knew he was going to pick me up from the chair and toss me out of his office. He leaned down, but instead of picking me up, he embraced me. "It's okay. I already know son. I love you no matter who you love."
"You already know? How?"
"Well, someone doesn't always remember to delete their internet history. You should be more careful, though. Mom doesn't care that you're gay, son, but I highly doubt she would want to see some of the stuff I stumbled across. At least you are picking classy enough sites kid."
I laughed a little, but I was very thankful. "Well, it means a lot that you don't care. I was afraid of telling you. And if we are being honest. That's why Talan and I aren't friends."
My dad's expression went from loving and caring to fuming mad in an instant. "You mean Talan Ivory doesn't want to be your friend because you are gay?!"
"No, dad. He doesn't want to be my friend because I waited so long to tell him I was gay, and yet I told Kellen I was gay after meeting him."
"Why did you tell him that?"
"Well, he actually figured it out. And then he asked me out. We are supposed to catch dinner and a movie I think. I'm not really sure, though, and to be honest, I'm not sure I'm up to it anymore."
"Wait, if he asked you out, why was Talan afraid he would be a homophobe?"
"That's what I'm confused about. I tried to ask him, but I can't really remember if he responded. I'm just so upset right now daddy. I don't know what to do."
"I know, baby, but something tells me that this will all blow over soon enough. 11 years is an awful lot of time invested to be so easily thrown away. Something tells me that this will all work out."
"I hope you're right. Look dad, forget about the take out. I ate lunch at school. I'm gonna see if I can't catch the last half of fourth block. I have practice today, so I really should get back."
"Okay, son. I love you and I'll see you at home. Mom is making meat loaf, and I'm having some clients over for dinner, so be ready to make a good impression kid."
"Okay, dad. I love you, too. I'll see you tonight."
As I stood up to leave, my dad grabbed me into another hug, and kissed me on the cheek. It has been a while since he has done that, and it made me feel a little better about what had happened that day. I smiled at Martha as I left the office, and I strolled to the car hoping that my dad was right. Maybe it was just a misunderstanding.
When I got back to school, I realized that I had about 45 minutes left in fourth block, and that I was going to try to make it. I went by the office to pick up the excuse that my dad had called in for me, and I headed to my locker to get my book for the class. As soon as I opened my locker, a piece of paper fell out. This was the same type of paper that my first Secret Admirer note was written on. I got butterflies in my stomach.
I have no poem this time. I am writing this in haste. I need you to know that I love you. The very sight of you gets me through the day. I am not sure how I would be able to go without you now that I know you. We will meet soon, and it will be a meeting of true love. Until then, my sweet, I bid you farewell. Forever Yours, Your Secret Admirer
Wow! I have got to know who this person is. Boy or girl, they are going to get at least a part of my heart.' I thought to myself as I closed my locker and headed for class. I had momentarily forgotten that I had Chemistry with Talan, and that we sat at the same lab table. I walked in, handed Mr. Carden my excuse, and walked towards the lab table. Talan looked up at me, and then motioned for me to look at my phone. You are in no position to tell me to do anything right now,' I thought to myself while trying my best to sit as far away from him at the tiny lab table as possible. I reluctantly pulled out my phone and checked it.
Talan: I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to say stuff the way I said it.
Me: Well, you got what you wanted. It looks like we aren't friends anymore.
I heard a gasp, and looked over at Talan. Tears were forming in his eyes as he looked at his phone. He raised his hand.
"Yes, Mr. Ivory?"
"Uh, Mr. Carden, can I be excused to the restroom?"
"Very well, my lecture is almost done anyway."
"Thank you." Talan got up and headed for the door. He turned and looked at me as he reached the door, and I saw a tear running down his cheek. He turned back around, and walked out the door. I focused my attention back on the board. Mr. Carden was just wrapping up his lecture when my phone vibrated. I checked to see what it was, and saw that Talan had sent me another text.
Talan: Meet me in the parking lot now.
Me: Excuse me? Who are you to tell me what to do?
Talan: Nathan, don't make this difficult. Just do it. Please.
Me: Alright. I guess I can this time, but remember, you don't tell me what to do.
Talan: Thanks.
"Mr. Carden, my father wants me home," I said after I put my phone away.
"Very well, Mr. Quincy. Have a great day."
"Thank you Mr. Carden, and you as well."
I pulled my stuff together, and started out the door when Brad called me over to his table.
"Everything cool with you and Talan?" he asked me with genuine concern on his face.
"No. We are no longer friends." I replied, feeling that familiar feeling of tears starting to form.
He pulled me into a side-hug, and held me for a minute. "I want to hear all the details on this, pal. Keep your head up. Everything is going to work out."
"Thanks Brad. Anyway, I gotta go meet Talan in the lot for something. I guess I'll holla at you laters, K?"
"Sure. Let me know how it goes."
"No doubt. Oh, and here is another Secret Admirer note. I got it in my locker before I came to class."
"Damn, we might have to up your protection." Brad laughed, "This is starting to get serious."
"Yeah. Well, I'm gone. I'll skype you later."
"K, bye." He took his arm off my shoulder and smacked my butt, and began laughing wildly as I left the room.
When I got to the parking lot, I didn't see Talan at first. I decided that I might as well forgo practice, being that I didn't feel much like doing any tumbling that day. As I reached my car, someone grabbed my shoulder.
"Thanks for coming out here." Talan said as he turned me around.
"Yeah, well, what do you want?" I was in no mood for pleasantries.
"I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am. I'm just...jealous of how you felt you could automatically trust Kellen with something that you felt you couldn't trust me with. I told you last night that nothing was going to change. I meant it. Nothing is going to change!"
"Talan, I tried to tell you earlier that I didn't tell him. He figured it out."
"Yeah, I know now. I had a nice talk with Kellen."
"Why?"
"Well, I was going to hurt him at first. I thought in my own twisted way that it was him who ruined our friendship. I see now that it was me, and so I decided to talk to him. He set me straight."
"Yeah, well, we are going on a date."
"I know. He told me. Look, I don't know if you will ever forgive me, but just know that no matter how you go about your life, I am going to fight tooth and nail to regain my spot."
"Talan, you aren't going to have to fight for anything. You always have been and always will be my best friend. Not even this stupid argument is going to change that. I forgive you."
His eyes lit up. "You mean it?"
"Of course I mean it. How would I ever get through this life without my best friend?"
He reached over and pulled me into a tight hug. "Thank you so much Natty! I'm so sorry. I promise I will never say something like that ever again!"
"Good. No can you let me go? I'm having a little trouble breathing."
He laughed and released me. "So, do you really like this Kellen kid?"
"I don't know, but what better way to find out than through a date?"
"Well, I still don't know about him, but you do what you have to do. But I swear to you here and now, if you have sex with him, I will beat your ass."
"Why? You have sex all the time with countless girls. Why can't I have a little fun?"
"You just finally decided to start telling people you are gay. You are not mentally ready for sex yet. I am not going to be picking up the pieces of a broken Nathanial. Not again."
"Okay, okay. No sex. I promise."
"Good, now let's hit the road. You drove me, remember?"
"I do now," I laughed. "Good thing you came out here, I would have left you."
Sitting in front of my computer screen, I punched in my Skype log in information, and waited for everything to load. I was no sooner logged in when I got a call from Brad. I accepted and we were soon talking to each other.
"So, all is well in paradise I presume." Brad said.
"Yeah, Talan apologized, so we are back to normal."
"Good. I couldn't stand being around him after lunch. He was so doom and gloom. What happened anyway?"
"It was a rather large misunderstanding."
"About you and that Kellen kid going on a date?"
"What?" He knew? How in the hell did he know?
"I'm the ears of the school, bud. I overheard Kellen telling Patrick about his date with you. No one else did, though. Anyway, I already knew you were gay."
"Damn, am I that obvious? You are the third person to tell me that today."
"No, its just that I don't usually throw a boner when I hug Talan. I am the one that has been starting all your sex rumors. Gotta protect your rep."
"I throw a boner when I hug Talan?" I was playing dumb. I knew I always got excited when I hugged Talan, but I was trying to play it off.
"Look, I don't care. In fact, I might be up to offering you a little relief if you need it."
I raised my eyebrows curiously. "You mean, you're gay too?"
"No, but I am very much so into sex. I like to suck a dick just as much as your average run of the mill gay guy, but I definitely prefer tuna to sausage."
"You've sucked someone off?"
"Yeah. It's not that bad actually. I don't really care to much for the action itself, but the reward is quite nice. Especially if they have a good diet."
"Damn, how many people we talking?"
"Just three."
"Who? Details man! Give me details."
"Well, Matt and Mike..."
"You sucked Matt and Mike?"
"We were drunk at Stacy's party, they did me first. I returned the favor. Turn about is fair play you know."
"Okay, who else?"
"Okay, but promise you won't laugh."
"The only thing I can promise is that I'll try not to touch myself."
Brad laughed, "Okay. Well the third person is Stacy's brother, Jordan."
"You sucked Jordan? Why? He isn't cute or anything."
"I know. It's just I spent the night at Stacy's when my rents were in the Keys, and I walked into the bathroom. He was in there, all boned up, and stroking the biggest dick I have ever seen. It literally made my mouth water. I had to try it, and I did. I swear, the boy had to have eaten pineapple for a week straight, because he had the most deliciously sweet cum. Like, I wanted every drop he could give me. So much so, that after he came, I kept sucking until he got firm in my mouth again. He blasted off a second round, just as sweet as the first, and I came in my shorts. It was unreal."
"Well, I hope you don't mind, but I need some relief. Can we talk later? I gotta go pull the pud."
"I'll be there in 10." With that, the connection was lost, and I was at a loss for words. One of my best friends was on his way over to my house to suck my dick. Wow. This was going to be some night. Just as I was beginning to get really excited, I felt my phone vibrate.
"Hello?" I said as I picked up the phone without looking at it.
"Hey. My rents wouldn't let me out of the house. My pops saw the tent in my pants, and thought I was all boned up to go see some girl, and he went into this spill about getting people pregs."
"Ehh, it's cool dude. I gotta hand. Ha."
"Yeah, I guess you're right. Sorry bro."
"Like I said, it's cool. So you're bi?"
"I like to think of myself as just extremely sexual. Matt says the same thing."
"What about Mike?"
"Mike said it was a one time thing. `I was drunk and horny, and you got all hard and shit. Something made me suck you.' That's what he always says whenever it gets brought up."
"Sounds like Mike. Anyway, dude, I'm gonna go relieve myself. I'll get back at cha laters. Dig?"
"Sounds good. Laters."
I put my phone down and began messaging myself through my boxers. I was hard as steel, and I needed relief. I snaked my hand through the opening in my boxers, and gripped my hard on firmly in my hand.
I felt it pulse with excitement as it was touched. I ran my hand up to the head and gathered some of the precum that was forming. I slowly started to massage my cock. It felt good. I guess after the day I had, this was just the kind of release I was going to need.
I was getting into a rhythm, and I was really starting to get myself off. My dick was pulsing, and my grip on it felt so good. I couldn't help but let my imagination wander. I first thought about Kellen giving me a hand job. It surprised even me that Kellen was the one performing the action, but I just rolled with it. He was working me over good.
Then, Kellen leaned over and licked the head of my cock. I gasped, both in my fantasy and real life. When he engulfed my dick, I saw stars and started to shoot a huge load. I was still playing through my fantasy in my head. I guess I let my fantasy self close his eyes, because what I heard surprised me.
"That was good. I love the way you taste. I would eat it all day everyday if I could."
My fantasy self opened his eyes, and he was staring right into Talan's. I thought to myself, `Damnit. Even when I have a date with a guy, all I can ever think about is Talan.'
I reached over onto my bedside table and got some tissues to clean up my chest and face from the mess I just made of myself. I realized that some of my cum had splattered my lips, so I decided, what the hell? I stuck my tongue out and licked it off. It tasted kinda sweet, but it also had a really strong taste. `Very masculine,' I thought.
Just as I had finished up, my bedroom door flew open, and Talan came walking through.
"You know, one would think that after last time, you would start knocking. You trying to see me cum again, boy?" I kidded.
"Maybe," Talan said with a mischievous smile while raising his eyebrows in a suggestive manner. "Anyway, I am crashing here tonight. Dad had to go on some emergency business trip, and he didn't want me in the house all by myself. `Never know what can happen,' he said. Like I'm some damn 3-year-old."
"Well that's understandable. You flooded the basement last time you were home alone. What kinda dumbass forgets to turn off the water in a bathtub when they go upstairs to make something to eat? I still don't understand that."
"Yeah, yeah. Well that was one of those crazy accidents. I'm a very responsible young man."
"Sure you are. Anyway, let me go clear it with the rents."
"I already did. They would give me their life savings if I asked for it, so I don't know why you always feel like you have to ask."
"Well, they are my parents."
I heard Talan mumble something under his breath, but I couldn't quite make it out. I thought he said, "Mine, too, someday," But I couldn't be sure. So, I asked him.
"What was that smartass?"
"Nothing. Anyway, let's go out for a run. We both missed practice today, and you're looking kinda pudgy. I will not let you ruin the six-pack I spent so long training you for. You understand me?"
"Fuck off! I am not getting fat, and, as I recall, who is the one that made me hide all the candy because they `aren't strong enough to resist temptation,' huh?"
"Yeah, well, I have more will power now. I gotta keep myself looking good for..." He paused before he continued, "Your mom."
"Hardy har har. Very fucking funny. Now hurry up and change. Let's get to it if we're running."
"Okay, and hey, this was chilling on your car when I pulled up. And don't worry, I didn't read it."
I recognized the paper in his hand. A part of me was really happy that I received another secret admirer letter. However, another part of me couldn't shake the feeling that the admirer was slowly becoming more like a stalker. "Ah, you can read it if you want. You know I don't care. But thanks for letting me have it first."
I took the letter from his hand and unfolded it. I started reading out loud.
The love I have for you is my saving grace Our first meeting will be when you cannot see my face. The Masquerade Ball is where I will bare my soul And to take you in my arms is my one and only goal I cannot make you go, my love, to you I must be fair But I will not be ashamed to say that I pray you will be there.
Forever Yours, Secret Admirer
I got butterflies in my stomach. I was going to be meeting my admirer at the school's annual Masquerade Ball. I was so nervous, and yet excited, all at the same time.
"Well, that person is gonna be crushed when you show up there with Kellen."
"No, they won't. You know as well as I do that you have to go stag to the ball. `Adds to the mystery,' everyone says. Don't tell me you forgot about that."
His eyes sparkled for a split-second, and then returned to normal. "Yeah, I forgot about that. Does add to the fun of it, I reckon."
"And what was the Kellen remark?"
"Well, you are going on a date with the kid, right?"
"Yeah, I guess I am."
"So I just assumed. Sorry, Natty."
"It's cool. Now hurry up, and let's start running."
I was so caught up in my thoughts about my secret admirer, that I didn't watch Talan undress like I usually did. I could not wait until that next Friday. I was going to meet the person that was giving me all these letters professing their love.
`What do I do if I don't like them? What if it's a girl? What if it's just a cruel prank being played on me?' I quickly realized that I was more nervous about the negatives than the positives. Maybe I could stand to wait on the ball.