[Insert standard disclaimer.]
[Email:lofi_erotica@hotmail.com]
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[Silent Torture][t/t]
[by]
[Like Herod][(c) 2001 The Author]
"Oh for fuck's sake," I muttered under my breath as Jack pulled himself out of bed.
"Ya know, I just don't feel ready for this," he was pulling his jeans on and looking around for his t-shirt.
"Do you not like me?" I wasn't being exactly supportive, but, I was kind of frustrated, know what I mean?
"It's... it's not you. OK?"
"You have issues with the gay thing?"
"No... it's not that either. Listen, I just don't want to. OK?"
"OK, OK. Do you want to sleep next door instead then?" A beat. A moments silence, then;
"Yeah, yeah ok."
I sighed with relief. The tension had been almost unbearable. First in a sexual way, then, then it was something different. He changed, in an instant. My head was happily bouncing up and down when suddenly he pushed me off, uttered a few words and pulled himself out of bed. All his body language changed, he was tense and nervous. I had no idea what had caused the change. What was happening in his head. He obviously had some thinking to do.
I led him into the room next to mine. He was noticably more relaxed now "You want to talk?" I asked as I watched him get undressed for the second time tonight.
"No, I'd just like to go to bed," another pause. He was about to take down his trousers, only this time he didn't want to. Not infront of me, at least.
"I'll see you in the morning then. If you need anything you know where I am," he nodded and smiled weakly. I suddenly felt prone, vulnerable, in my nakedness and quickly made my wake back to my own bed.
I thought about earlier. We'd all been a little drunk, hanging out in the attic of a friend's house whilst her parents were away. Jack was someone I was always pleased to see. He was quiet but with a good sense of humour and a gorgeous smile. He wasn't physically beautiful, I suppose he was an averagely good looking 17 year old. Just a shade shorter than me (I was 6') and with the same skinny build, there was something about him that had caught my attention the first time I saw him. I couldn't say I loved him, I barely knew him above the trivial conversations we'd had at parties we'd both attended, but he was worth trying to get to know better.
So that's what I did, tried to get to know him better. Whenever we spoke he had a habit of making eye contact with me, I took this as a good sign. We talked about bullshit for a while but never about sex. I was finding it hard going to find subtext in his words so I just gave up. I was happy enough to just be better friends. He knew I was gay (I think everyone knows I'm gay) so if he wanted to make that first move, the choice was his.
The end of the night drew close and I was feeling bold.
"Jack, wanna sleep over at mine?" I gulped. I suddenly realised what I'd said, and that what I was really asking must have been obvious, to say the least. My semi-drunken haze had suddenly lifted and things seemed terrifyingly crystal clear.
"Umm sure," he made eye contact again and gave one of his little laughs. I couldn't help but laugh aswell.
"I'll say my goodbyes and meet you by the door in 5 minutes. OK?" He nodded slightly dopely and grinned as I left the room to say bye to various people who had defused through the house.
I saw him by the door, waiting for me patiently. I smiled as I approached him and motioned towards the door. He led the way into the cold night air. We began walking towards my house in silence. In my ultra-conscious state the silence was oppressive but each time I looked at Jack he seemed to be content with the quiet.
Five minutes passed in this way until he broke the silence "Ben."
"Yeah?"
"You... you're gay. Right?"
"Umm yeah," his bluntness was suprising.
"Thought so. I mean people say things, but I don't listen to rumours, and I don't like to presume and..." he seemed flustered "oh god..."
"Whats up?"
"I... I think I might be gay as well," He stopped and made eye contact with me.
"Well... that's good," I giggled. I didn't know what else to do. He seemed upset by this, almost like I'd broken his heart "Hey, I didn't mean to sound nasty. I just... well, I just don't really know how to react. We're you expecting me to congratulate you or something?"
"I... I don't know. You're just the first person I've told. Ugh... it's all messed up...."
"Hey, don't get all beat up about it," I stepped a bit closer and hugged him "Incase your wondering this is a friendly act, not a sexual one," he smiled.
"I kinda like it. I mean, I like being in your arms like this," he made eye contact with me again. His lips were so close to my own, his breath was hot on my face but I couldn't enjoy any of it. Not only was I trying my best to keep my erection from pressing into him and ruining the moment but I was also genuinely touched he'd come out to me second only to himself. I felt I needed to keep my postion as friend. At least for now.
"I hate to break the moment," believe me, I genuinely did, "but I'm getting cold. My house is just round the corner. Let's get inside before we freeze to death."
We were inside my house and in my room as quick as lightning. Once there I could feel the tension, the sexual tension, that is. We sat on the end of my bed and just looked into each other's eyes.
He made the first move, his arm onto my cheek, more delicately than I could have imagined. I moved my face towards his and gently brushed my lips against his before moving my mouth up and kissing each eye-lid softly as his hands brushed up and down my chest.
I pushed him back onto the bed and began to take off his trousers and kiss his navel. He arched his back to help me and removed his shirt as I pulled his trousers off from around his feet. He wore striped briefs that sent me wild as I licked his cock through the cotton. He writhed with pleasure as I removed his briefs and played with his balls with my hands as I again moved my lips up to meet his.
We kissed for what seemed an eternity. We explored each others mouths and faces with our tounges and lips and the rest of each others bodies with our hands. He began to undress me first unbuttoning my trousers and pushing them to the floor and then pulling away long enough to take off my t-shirt. He kissed me gently before begining to move down towards my waist. He hooked his thumbs into the waistband of my Jockeys before slowly removing them letting my erection spring out coming to rest no more than an inch infront of his face. He nervously licked its tip before taking the end gently, always gently, into his mouth. He wasn't experienced, and it showed, but still he gave me such extreme pleasure I felt ready to explode almost immediately.
I pulled him back up to eye level with me and drunk in his beautiful face before moving down, once again, to his pulsating 6' cock. I took almost all of it into my mouth and worked it as well as I ever had for anyone else, playing with his balls and anus with my hands, trying to stimulate in everyway I knew how. I wanted his first time to be good. That's when it happened. When he changed.
And so now I sit alone in my room. I find the briefs he forgot to put on. I bring them to my nose and slowly, absentmindedly pump myself to orgasm. I stay awake for another couple of hours. Thinking I can hear quiet sobbing next door I myself begin to choke with tears.
I cry myself to sleep as the first rays on sun peek over the horizon heralding a bright new day.
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[Silent Torture][t/t]
[by]
[Like Herod]
[]
[email:lofi_erotica@hotmail.com][(c) 2001 The Author]