note: hey people! so sorry it took so long to get the last two out. obligations...grr...anyway, here's justin to tell you what happened to him. (this never happend and i'm not saying the guys or anyone is gay, okay? it's all in my head...) and thanks to y'all who emailed me about the last part. it got me motivated to put this one up now...you're watching me, arent you?...(puts hands on cheeks like HOME ALONE) oh no, they're onto me!
IMPORTANT! READ THIS EVEN IF YOU DIDNT READ THE RAMBLING ABOVE~if you really like this story, email me! it's ajsaysyourefired@yahoo.com I have something that should interest you. onto the story!!
~
We finished our lunches and had a mini sandcastle-building contest (to make up the 1/2 hour wait since we just ate). Kevin judged. Nick and AJ tied for first (since they're both good artists) Brian got 2nd, I got 3rd, and Howie 4th. But he didn't care. We went swimming again, goofing around until 4:30, when Kevin said we should get ready to go. We got all our stuff together and dried off and changed into our clothes not a minute too soon, cause then the limo pulled up.
"Y'all want dropped off at your hotel?" Kevin asked JC and me.
"Yes, we better." JC said.
"Justin, do you want to go out to dinner with us?" Brian asked me. "We might go out to one of them fancy restaurant trips."
"Uh, sure. Okay." I said, smiling.
"Actually, he can't." JC said, looking at me darkly.
"Why not?" I protested, sounding like I was whining. He gave me a Look.
"I'll walk him back." Brian offered.
JC shook his head. "We have to be back in plenty of time for out flight to Atlanta."
"What time is it?" Nick asked him.
"Nine-thirty."
"So if you're on the plane at nine o'clock, you'd leave your hotel at 8:15." Brian said. "That's plenty of time."
JC was looking at me. "He shouldn't."
I pouted. "I want to."
JC didn't say anything.
"Who says he's your boss?" Nick said to me. "If you want to come then come."
"Yeah." Brian seconded.
"Well..." I said.
"You can if you want to." AJ said.
"Okay then, I will." I smiled. JC was looking at me. "What?" I said defensively.
"I really wouldn't if I was you." He warned.
"Were you." I corrected, being smart.
"What?!" he demanded incredulously.
"Were you. If I were you." I said. He just looked at me, and I knew I was going to get it when I got back. I sighed. Well, since I was going to get it anyways, why not go with Brian and have some fun already? "I'm going." I said to JC. "Count me in." I told Brian.
Brian smiled. "Good. So JC, do you want us to drop you off at your hotel?"
"Fine." He said. He looked at me darkly. "What time should we expect you back?"
I looked at Brian.
"Seven-thirty, quarter to eight." He said. "That okay?"
"Fine." JC said. He sat back, glaring at me. Everyone must have sensed the tension between me and him and kept quiet.
We pulled up in front of the hotel *Nsync was staying at. JC opened his door. "Uh, Brian." JC said. "Is he going to be with you or around you all the time?"
"Yeah, probably."
"Can I get your cell phone number so we can call you in case we need him?"
"Sure." Brian wrote it down for him. JC took it, bid goodbye to the others, and went. The driver put he limo in gear for the BSB's hotel.
Silence. No one said anything. I was a stranger among them. (That sounded like a cool book title, dontcha think? A Stranger Among Them....hmm...)
"You don't sleepwalk, do you Justin?" Howie said gently, all the sudden.
"What?" I said, taken aback. "Oh. Uh, yes I do. But usually one of the guys catches me before I fall down the stairs. Last night no one heard me, and I fell. No big deal."
"Looks like someone beat the hell out of you." Kevin remarked.
I looked down and studied the red marks. "I fell." I repeated softly.
"Leave him be." Brian said softly. The others shut up.
"We'll probably just eat either in the restaurant in the hotel or order room service, at the risk of being seen." Kevin said to me. "That okay?"
"Oh, sure." I nodded.
We came to the door. Kevin paid the driver and we went into the hotel. Brian led me up to the room he and Nick shared. "We'll eat in here." He said. "The others are going out. As in in public."
"Okay." I said.
"Have a seat." Nick gestured to the chair. I sat in it, and he flopped down on one of the beds.
"I'm going to take a shower, then we'll order, okay?" Brian said.
"Whatever." Nick nodded. "Hey Justin, want to play Nintendo?"
"Sure!" I grinned. He grinned back and took out a N64 system, and put in a mortal kombat cartridge. He handed me a controller, and we began playing.
"Why do they hit you?" Nick asked again after a minute.
I sighed. "I told you. They hate me because I'm gay. They don't want me looking at them in that way or trying to do stuff with them."
"Do you?"
"No, of course not."
"Would you?"
"I certainly doubt it. Why would I? I'm not attracted to them."
Pause. "But you're attracted to Brian, aren't you?" he said.
I shrugged. "He's very attractive. He's very sweet, too, especially to be my friend. He's really funny, and kind, and nice. And I think he's very good-looking."
Nick sighed. "I guess. Hey, how come you told the others you sleepwalk?"
"What good would it do to tell the truth, especially in front of JC." I sighed. "They all beat me when they found out I told Brian I'm gay. They don't know you or Brian know they hit me. That would be a disaster. I mean...I saw that look in your eyes when we sat down at lunch that said plain as day you wanted to jump him."
"I did." He admitted. "You don't deserve that kind of treatment."
"Well, what if Kevin, Howie and AJ felt the same way you did? What if they actually decided to jump JC like you wanted to? He would tell Joey, Chris and Lance what happened, and they would come looking for you guys to fight you back for JC, and they would know I told. It's just bad, Nick. If your other band mates hit my band mates for me, it would be a disaster. Better to just prevent it all." I explained.
"Whatever." He sighed. "But I'd turn them in if I was you."
Brian came out of the bathroom, drying his hair. "Y'all ready to eat? Room service or order pizza?"
"Yeah, pizza!" I said.
"Okay." Nick nodded.
"Okay, what do we want on it? 2 mediums?"
"Yeah sure. I want plain pepperoni." I said.
"Cheese." Nick said.
"Okay, 1 pepperoni and 1 cheese." Brian said. "I'll eat some of each." He nodded. "Should we get pop too?"
"Yeah." Nick said.
Brian picked up the phone and ordered it. "Forty minutes." He set it back down.
"Uh-oh," I said, suddenly thinking of something.
"What-oh?" Nick said.
"I don't have any money on me. Just my credit card. And I should help pay for it." I said.
"We'll cover you, bud." Nick said.
"But that aint fair." I protested. I looked up at Brian. "Do you take credit cards?" I held mine out.
"Sure." He plucked it out of my hand, and put it in his back pocket, relaxing against his bed. I just looked at him. He laughed, and handed it back to me. "Don't worry about it Justin. It's okay, it's out treat."
"Are you sure?" I said, looking at him then Nick. They both nodded. "Well, okay, I guess." I said.
"Good. Now back to our conversation on the beach that was interrupted." Brian said.
"Which one?" Nick said.
I laughed.
"The one when we were interrogating ol' Justin about his love life."
"I have no love life." I snorted.
"Everyone does." Brian corrected. "This is the part where Nick and I ask you a whole bunch of questions like you did to us."
"Oh. That." I sighed.
"Yes, that!" Nick said.
"Have you ever been with a girl?" Brian asked.
"Yes."
"How many?"
"A few. The last was three years ago."
"Ever kissed a girl?"
"Yeah, I kissed all of 'em."
"Cuddled?"
"Yeah."
"Make-out?"
"No."
"Oral sex?"
"Hell no."
"Ever made love to a woman?"
"Ew. No."
"Well, how far have you gone with a girl?" Brian inquired.
"Cuddled."
"Have you ever been with a guy?" Nick started up.
"Nope."
"No?" he looked shocked. "Well, have you ever kissed a guy?"
"Well, when I was a toddler I kissed my dad. And my little brothers when they were small." I said.
"That doesn't count." He informed me.
"Well, no then."
"Cuddled? Make out?" Nick asked me. I shook my head. He stared at me a moment in disbelief, then pointed at me and said, quite loudly, "VIRGIN!"
I gave him a look.
"You are!" he said incredulously. "You're a virgin, aren't you?"
"Cram it." I said, sighing.
"You're a virgin?" He repeated.
"Yes!" I said, throwing my hands up in the air. "Yes, I am a virgin! Now shut up, okay?"
"Yes, let him be." Brian said.
"I just can't believe you're a virgin." Nick said, shaking his head. "You'd think that with your popularity-"
"I believe the same thing you do." I said to him, cutting him off. "I believe that you should wait. Until you're married or completely sure you want to spend the rest of your life with your lover. And I've never felt actual true love you any woman, and I've never been with a man."
"Why haven't you?"
I shrugged. "Just cause. About a year and a half ago is when I told my parents and bandmates I'm gay. I couldn't date a guy before then cause (a) everyone would find out about me and (b) I never met anyone I was interested in. and I cant since I told my bandmates cause they wont let me out of their sight, and anytime I even glance at or say a word to another guy they think I'm trying to get him in bed with me. After you returned my wallet, Brian, Lance yelled at me and said I was trying to seduce you."
"If they wont let you out of their sight why are you here with none of them?" Nick asked.
"JC didn't want to let you all on that something like that was going on. Y'all saw how he was telling me I couldn't come. And when I said I was, he knew he had to let me or cause a scene."
"They're going to punish you for it when you go back, aren't they?"
"Of course."
"That's what they did after I took him home from the party." Brian said. "One of 'em called me and asked if he was with me the whole time, that sort of load. Ya know, checking up on him."
"That was Lance and I expected him to do that." I said.
"Who's' the meanest and who's the less meanest?" Nick asked.
"Lance is definitely the meanest." I said. "Chris is a close second, then Joey. JC..." I paused thoughtfully. "He doesn't hit me. He just pulls my arms back so I cant fight back even if I wanted to. He's never hit me. Not at all. But the others sure make up for it."
"Why doesn't he hit you?"
I shrugged. "I have no clue. I haven't really thought about it, and I don't dare ask him or he might start. I kinda think its cause him and I used to be real close." I said. "We were like best friends. We always hung out in our spare time and told each other everything. I think he doesn't want to hit me cause I was kinds like his kid brother."
Knock knock. "Pizza!"
"Ohh, yea!" I said.
Brian got up and got our food. He paid the guy, and Nick paid Brian back for 1/2 of it. "Here we go." Brian said, putting the pizza boxes on his bed. We all sat on it (Brian's bed-not the pizza!) and dug in. Brian poured us all some pop.
"Justin, you have pizza sauce on your face." Nick commented after a minute.
I licked my lips. "Yeah well you have a dickfor on your face."
He looked blank for a minute. "What's a-" he paused. "Ohh." He laughed. "And I almost fell for that!"
Brian snorted.
By the time we finished our supper, it was six-thirty. "Well, now what do you want to do?" Brian said.
"We could play spin-the-bottle," Nick suggested.
"That is the gay-est thing I have ever heard!" I exploded. He laughed.
"We could give Justin a make-over." Brian suggested.
"No, I stand corrected. That is the gay-est thing I have ever heard." I said, rolling my eyes. Brian laughed.
"Hey, remember two years ago when *NSync was going on tour with Britney Spears?" Nick said to Brian.
"Uh, yeah, I think so." He nodded.
Nick grinned. "Remember that commercial when Lance spins the bottle, there's the 5 *NSync guys and Britney sitting around. They're all watching the bottle. Lance sits down, sprays some breath freshener into his mouth...and...the bottle lands on Justin!"
I laughed. "Oh yeah, that was pretty funny."
"I cracked up when I first saw it." Brian said.
"So, did Lance kiss you then?" Nick inquired, an evil gleam in his eye.
"Of course not." I rolled my eyes.
"Oh yeah I forgot you've never even been kissed by a guy." He rolled his eyes back.
"Well do you want to kiss me!" I snapped.
"Okay." He said.
Silence. "Um I wasn't serious." I notified.
He sighed. "Oh fine then."
"Aw, just kiss him Justin!" Brian said.
"Why don't you?" I said, being smart.
"I have!"
"Oh reeeaally." I said. "New gossip. Hurry, fill me in!"
He shrugged. "It's no big deal. After we told our bandmates we're gay, they wanted to play Truth or Dare. So we were like okay, then AJ decided he wanted to be an idiot and dared us to kiss. So we did."
"Tongue?" I asked. He nodded.
"We could play Truth or Dare." Nick suggested.
"Okay." I said.
"Alright then." Brian said. "Let's get it on, you *NSync stinker. Truth or dare."
"Hmm...truth, you Backdoor boy."
He laughed. "Okay. Do you have a crush on anyone?"
"Do you mean do I Like anyone or if I got to choose who to go out with who would I pick?"
"Ooh that's better! The latter." He said.
I thought. "Hmmm...I kinda like that Drew Lachey guy from 98degrees...but if I got to choose, I'd probably pick Mark Barry from BBMak. He's cute and I love his voice, and accent." I said. "My turn. Nick, truth or dare."
"Hmm...Truth."
"Okay. Ooh, I got a good one. What did you mean when I said well why don't you kiss me and you said okay?"
He blushed. "I just meant okay, I will."
"Why? Do you want to kiss me?"
He paused. "Hey, you're only allowed to ask one question. Hey Frick truth or dare."
"Dare Frack dare."
"Okay dokey...I dare you to...give Justin a lapdance."
"HUH?" I looked at Brian. "Are you going to?"
"You got it babe." He said. He looked at Nick. "Lapdance or striptease/lapdance?"
"Hmm...the latter." Nick grinned.
"Alrighty. Hey, put some music on." His said, standing up. Nick flipped on the radio. 'What Kind of Love Are You On' by Aerosmith (from the Armageddon soundtrack, ya know, at the stripper bar) came one. "Alright, stripper music." Brian said abstractedly, and began dancing in front of me. Slowly, his shirt came off. He began unzipping his jeans.
"Oh lordy." I rolled my eyes, as Brian, still shaking his hips, caused his pants to fall down. They were about halfway to his knees when he came over and put a hand on my shoulder and kept shaking it.
"You know you like it." He said in a sexy voice, sitting on my lap and moving around.
"Oh lordy." I said again.
Nick laughed. "Hey, if he gets a boner you make sure you jump off him before it spits up and says hello, Brok."
"Bite me." I said to Nick. He laughed.
Brian kept dancing and his jeans came off, exposing his navy blue boxers. He stopped, and looked at Nick. "Do I stop now?"
"Hmm...after you flash him."
Brian nodded and looked at me, and set his hands on the line of his boxers, ready to pull them down. "Ready?" he said to me.
I looked blank for a moment, then covered my eyes. "NO!" I protested.
"Justin, have you ever seen another guys dick?" Nick said to me.
I uncovered my eyes to give him a Look. "How crude."
"Well, have you?"
"No!" I sighed.
He stared at me, then shook his head. He gestured to Brian. "Well, look at him then."
"I don't want to."
Brian snorted. "How straight are you?"
"None." I said, not looking at him.
"Aw, c'mon Justin, just look." He said.
"No."
"Why not?"
"Just because."
"Okay, fine, I wont." He said.
I sighed in relief. "Thank you." I said, and glanced at him. Well wouldn't you just know his manhood is hanging out and in plain sight?
"BRI-AN!" I protested.
He put his boxers back, laughing. "Ha ha ha ha ha." He sang.
I pouted. "That is not funny."
He got serious again. "Okay, I'm sorry."
I glanced at him. "Really?"
He sat next to me and put a hand on my shoulder. "Yes, really." He said. "I promise I'll never do that again."
I sighed. "Okay."
"Do you accept my apology?"
"What? Oh. Uh, sure." I nodded.
He grinned. "Okay Nick truth or dare."
Nick thought a moment, and whispered into Brian's ear. "Okay." Brian said. "I dare you to French kiss Justin."
"What!" I said. Brian finished dressing and sat down on the bed. He shrugged at me.
"Is that okay Justin?" Nick asked me, his blue eyes very serious.
I thought a moment. "Only if you admit that you told Brian to dare you to do that."
He sighed. "Okay, I did."
"Why?" I asked, genuinely curious.
"Because I want to kiss you." He said after a moment of silence.
"Why?"
He shrugged, eyes down, looking ashamed. "Cause you're a really nice, sweet guy who's treated really badly and I want to help you. I just...I just want to kiss you."
"Oh." I said quietly.
Pause. "So is it okay?" he asked again.
I swallowed. "I...I guess so."
He smiled, pleased, and stood up. He took one of my hands in his and pulled me up. He put his hands around my waist, at the small of my back, and pulled me over to him, turning his head a bit. I swallowed. I hadn't been lying when I said I never was kissed by another man before. His lips touched mine, and it shocked me that my body knew just what to do. My arms went around his neck, my eyes closed, and my mouth opened. His tongue entered my mouth.
He kissed me for about ten seconds, then let me go. He smiled at me and held both my hands in his, rubbing them. I sighed. He let me go, and we both sat down.
"Aww." Brian said, grinning.
"Cram it." Nick said softly.
"Uh-oh, look at what time it is." Brian said, pointing to the clock. It said 7:10pm. "We better get takin' you back or your buddies will be mad if you're late."
"They're going to be mad anyway." I sighed. "Cause JC said I couldn't go and I came anyway."
"Are you glad you did?" Nick asked me solemnly.
"Huh? Oh, yeah, I guess I am." I nodded.
"C'mon, let's go. I'll walk you back." Brian said. "Your buddies will probably want to make sure you was with me and Nick the whole time anyway."
"Okay." I stood up.
"Wanta come along Nicky?" Brian asked him.
He shook his head abstractedly. "Naw, I'll just stay here and think."
"Okay." B-Rok shrugged. We turned to go.
"Um, Bri, if you see any of the other guys," Nick called.
Brian turned around. "What?"
"Don't tell them please." He gestured to me.
Brian nodded. "Alright. C'mon Curly let's go."
"Okay."
We walked out of the hotel. Brian put on sunglasses and I put on a baseball cap with the bill pulled low.
"So, how did you like your first gay kiss?" Brian asked me.
I shrugged. "I liked it okay."
He glanced at me. "Just okay? This is Nick we're talking about here."
"So?"
"So..." he stopped talking.
"Do you think he's a good kisser?" I glanced at him sideways.
"Yeah, I know he is." He nodded.
"Oh really? Then there were more kisses than the dare?"
He was quiet a moment. "hey, we've got a week of vacation coming up. Want to get together and hang out?"
"Sure." I said, ignoring his change of subject. "We have a week to. When's yours?"
"March 19-25."
"No way. Ours is too."
"Get completely out of here." He said, shocked.
I smiled and shrugged. "It's true. We wanted the time off when the new album is released."
"Huh. Well, are you going to see any relatives or anything?"
I shook my head. "Nope. My dad hates me cause I'm gay, and my mom doesn't care about me anymore. I have two little 1/2 brothers, but they're my dad's kids, and I can't see them since I don't dare go see him."
"Oh. I'm sorry." He said sincerely.
"Aw, it's okay. Are you?"
"Yeah, my parents are coming for a day. They have to go back after that, though. But we're playing in my hometown two weeks after that, so I'll get to see them and my older brother then."
"Your family doesn't mind that you're gay?"
"Oh, no. I mean, they're real religious and all, but they love me for me and they know it's just who I am and I cant help it or change it. They're real supportive."
"Oh. Lucky." I sighed.
"Well, hey. Hey, since you're not doing anything and we have the same time off, want to spend the week wit me at my house?"
A smile lit up my face. "Sure! That is, if your parents wont mind."
"Naw, I have friends stay over all the time."
"They wont think we're sleeping together, will they?"
"There goes that question again." He raised an eyebrow at me.
"Well I'm sorry! but will they?"
"Not if I tell them we're not."
"Good. You do that."
"I will then. So you'll come?"
"Yeah." I smiled again.
When we got to my hotel, Brian came up with me. I opened the door of the room I shared with JC. All the others were there.
"Hi yawl." Brian greeted. "I just came to walk Justin back. See ya later."
"So he was with you the entire time?" Lance asked.
"Yup." Brian nodded. I went and sat in a chair.
"Was he trying anything with you?" Lance asked Brian in a kind voice (the one all the girls melted to, the one I haven't heard in a year and a half). "It's okay, if he has, you should tell us."
Brian shook his head. "Nope, he certainly did not. He acts like a normal guys. Take it from someone who's gay, Justin certainly doesn't act gay. If I didn't know him I'd say he wasn't."
Lance scowled. "Was he trying anything with Nick?"
"Nope. Nothing. Hell, I tried to flash him and he wouldn't look." Brian said nonchalantly. Lance just stared at him, and Brian broke into a smile and clapped him on the back. "J/K bro, you need to chill." He looked at the others. "Bye yawl."
"Bye." They said. Brian left.
I was sitting in the chair, leaned over, my elbows on my knees and my head in my hands. I was spaced off, thinking. I kept seeing Brian's face, his body, his eyes. His eyes were really...I don't know. I remembered his body when he was getting ready to go swimming. I saw (in my minds eye) him stripteasing and lapdancing on me. And although I didn't want to admit it to Brian or Nick, I actually did (kind of) like it...
"HEL-LO! JUSTIN!"
"Huh?" I was awakened out of my reverie by the others.
"Hello, we've been calling you." Lance said.
"What was you doing?" JC said.
"Um...Just thinking, that's all."
"About what? You were a million miles away!"
I shrugged. "I dunno."
"Why did you go off with them after JC told you you couldn't go?" Chris demanded.
I shrugged, sighing. "Cause I wanted to go."
"Why can't you learn to do what you're told!" Lance said.
I sighed. One of these days I'm going to have to beat the crap out of him, the little prick. Regardless of consequences, he sure needed it. I probably would've attacked him and started hitting him right then and there, but I didn't seem to have the strength. I felt light-headed and dizzy, and B-Rok was still on my mind. I couldn't help wondering what he would do in my exact position. He couldn't turn them in, it would only cause more problems. And he couldn't shoot off his mouth cause they'd get him worse. I wonder. I wonder a lot of things.
"You need to learn!" Lance was saying. "Do what you're told. And don't you go anywhere without one of us!"
I stood up. "Alrighty then, which one of you would like to accompany me to the men's room, cause I gotta go."
"Now you're being smart!" Chris yelled.
"Way to go shortfeet, you figured that out all by yourself. Go give yourself a gold star." I said. {{referring to the fact Chris wears size 7 shoes}}
"You-" Lance started.
"Just leave me alone." I said irritably. "Why cant you ever just let me be? I never did anything to you."
Silence. Everyone (including JC) stared at me, not believing I was talking to Lance like that. They all looked at Lance, waiting, to see what he was going to do about it. It was silent for a full minute while they watched me or Lance. I finally looked away from staring him right in the eyes (something I'm not allowed to do) and sighed.
"Get him." Lance said.
They took three steps and were all over me. JC ran and pulled my arms behind my back so I could move. I sighed. How very mature of them, eh? But then, they weren't mature very often. They acted like two and three year olds and then Lance goes and says in a interview that *NSync was more mature and serious than the BSB. How rude.
"So, you like being smart, huh?" Lance came and stood in front of me.
"Sure why not." I said.
He hit me. "Learn! And quit being smart, you faggot!"
"Ooh, name calling. Real mature." I rolled my eyes.
He hit me again. "Yes it is very mature, isn't it."
"Whatever."
He hit me again. "No, not whatever."
"Than what?"
"Than learn not to be a faggot."
"Okay, okay. Care to give me lessons? I'm sure you have some personal experience..."
He looked infuriated. "What is your problem?" he yelled. (Gee, I'm standing here restrained and you're hitting me. Would anyone else have a problem with that? C'mon, let's see those hands!) "Don't you talk to me like that!" he said.
"That's how you talk to me."
"Yeah, well, I'm not a fag, like you."
"Really? Well gee Lance, thanks for clearing that up. I never was too sure about that."
He belted me in the face. "Dirty faggot, don't you talk to me like that. You really need to knock off your attitude, or you're really going to get it."
I rolled my eyes. "Like you aint gonna hit me anyway."
"That's right." He said, and hit me again.
"So why bother." I muttered.
"Bother what?" Chris shot.
"Being nice to you guys." I sighed. "Cause no matter what I do, you're all going to be pricks and hit me anyway." I said bitterly.
JC gasped a little and loosened his hold on my arms, but then grabbed me up again quick before anyone noticed. I also don't think anyone heard his gasp. Hmmm. I wonder what that was all about.
"That's right." Lance was saying.
"Why?" I looked up at them genuine sadness in my voice.
Lance rolled his eyes. "Oh now the faggots gonna cry...well go ahead and cry, you sissy!"
I sighed. Like I said, why bother.
Lance began hitting me hard. After he finished (Usually the only time one would finish would be when his hand ached) and Chris and Joey hit me. JC just let me go, and I fell to the ground. He didn't hit me. And I didn't feel a single blow that he others had thrown at me, and I wondered about that. I had just received my first real (cause I'm gay) kiss by Nick Carter, but all I could think about was Brian Littrell...