Disclaimer: This story is mostly about gay relationships, and it contains lots of steamy gay sex! If graphic descriptions of homosexual sex are not your thing, then what the hell are you doing in a gay site in the first place? And how did you go through nine chapters without noticing the graphic gay sex anyway!??!
The characters in this story usually have unprotected sex, but they're fictional characters...and mutants are immune to HIV anyway (according to the X-Men comics!). But you guys should know better, right? ALWAYS use a condom! :-)
The X-Men, Movieverse or Comicverse, all belong to Marvel, Stan Lee and Fox. Most of them are not gay in the real comics or movies, but that doesn't apply for this story.
Any comments, criticism and suggestions about new subplots and characters are absolutely welcomed! Just e-mail me at: Mitsaso@gmail.com
Season Two of the Slutty X-Men begins!!!
SLUTTY X-MEN
Chapter 11
No More Tears
The moon was full that night, sheding ample and moody light on the tree tops, illuminating the clearing amongst them in an eerie way.
It was a very secluded place, not very far from the nearest town, but it belonged to a wealthy farmer named Ambrosius Quinn.
Mr.Quinn had acres and acres of land there, and nobody really cared to tresspass that endless land of trees and fields, except for the occasional teenage couple who needed a peaceful and spacious place like this to carnally aknowledge each other.
However, that night, something very different was afoot. The people making their way in those fields had anything but sex on their mind. They were about fifteen dark figures clad in large purple cloaks, carrying torches, ancient-looking books and other mystical instruments we don't really wanna know what they are.
Not all of them though. Four of those mysterious figures were carrying a coffin, slowly, almost ceremoniously. When they all finally reached a small altar at the very end of the clearing, they put the coffin down and formed a small circle around the altar, chanting some weird, yet vaguely familiar words.
The leader of the cultists, whose golden details on his purple cloak differentiated him from the others, walked up to the coffin and opened it.
Inside of it was a tied up, depowered, and very much scared Bobby Drake!
"What do you guys want from me...?" He said with a voice full of terror. "You have me as a hostage for days...you don't talk to me...you feed me, take care of me, but WHY?"
"Silence, Chosen One.", the Cult Leader said, revealing his face. It was Ambrosius Quinn, the very owner of the land they were in. Not that Bobby could have any idea who that was, but at least now we know why that altar and all these cultists are on his land and he, as an owner, has no problem with that.
"Chosen? For what?" asked Bobby, confused. If he was, like, the Messiah of that little cult, then he wouldn't have much to worry about, would he?
"Tonight, our investment in you pays off", said Ambrosius. "We paid that blue-skinned lady with a lot of cash to get you, although she seemed equally anxious to get rid of you for some reason. We even paid extra for the injections that leave you with no powers for enough time to make this sacrifice come to pass..."
"SACRIFICE?!?! Are you people crazy? LET ME GO!" Bobby started kicking and screaming, but two cloaked cultists grabbed him from his arms and knees and carried him out of the cofin and right on the altar.
Then the Cult Leader spoke again. "We told you nothing of your fate all these days, Chosen One, for fear that you would harm yourself to avoid this. But your supple flesh and warm blood are meant to appease our Goddess Barbra, and your youth will be channeled over to her Earthly Avatar and keep her eternally young and beautiful, like she was when she first filmed "Funny Girl".
Bobby, although he was in to position to, couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. "You guys worship a goddess named Barbra?" Then he combined all the earlier hints and filled in the blanks and realised what was going on...
"OH MY GOD! YOU'RE GOING TO SACRIFICE ME TO--"
"The Supreme Goddess Barbra Streisand, yes, Chosen One. We sacrifice a young stud like you every year so that she remains eternally young." Ambrosius said with a serene, satisfied smile.
"It's not your sacrifices that keep her young, you idiot, it's Botox!!!!!!" Bobby said in exasperation. Those people were even nuttier than your everyday, friendly-neighborhood cultist!
"How DARE YOU speak like that? Her Divinity does not bother with those vain, mortal little half measures! The Barbra Streisand most mortals know is only a mortal, avatar body that is temporarily inhabited by Her Divinity, until she decides to go back to The Heavens and sing her hymns to Beauty and Love from up there, ruling us with her Voice! But until then, her faithful worshippers have to make sure her body doesn't wither and die until she choses to." said Ambrosius, before he opened up a little chest and took out a huge sacrificing dagger.
"Oh no no nononono, please don't, you don't have to do that this way, there's botox and awesome plastic surgeons nowadays, why can't we talk---"
"SILENCE! It is time. My brethren, begin the incantations for the sacrifice. We have to be swift, Yentl is on TV in 25 minutes..." said Ambrosius, as he slowly raised his dagger, ready to strike at poor, helpless Bobby.
Suddenly, an unexpected gust of wind swept over the unsuspecting cultists, extinguishing their awfully cliched and terribly impractical torches.
Everything was veiled under the dark embrace of the moonless night.
"What the hell happened?" Ambrosius said, unable to locate Bobby's heart so that he could sacrifice him aproppriately. "Get those lighters out, my brethren, and light the torches again. We must make quick work of this, for time is of great importance here!"
But then a sweet yet strangely recognisable music started playing, which provoked them from doing what their leader told them to, especially when a heavenly voice started murmuring a melody...
"Mmmm mmmmmmm mmmmm mmmmmmm, mmmmm mmm mmmmmmm...."
The crazy cult members gasped in awe as a mysterious spotlight fell right next to a tree, revealing a very special guest star, singing just for her most religiously faithful fans...Barbra Streisand herself!!!
BABS: "It's... raining, it's.... pouring my love-life is boring me to tears, after all theeeeese yeaaaaars..."
The cultists, including Ambrosius, let their weapons and unlit torches fall to the ground and kneeled before Their Goddess, but then a SECOND spotlight revealed another guest starring diva, a friend of Their Goddess, and it was none other than Donna Summers herself, joining Babs into the song!
DONNA: "...No sunshine, no moonlight, no stardust, no sign of romance we don't stand a chanceeee...."
BABS: "...I've always dreamed I 'd find the perfect lover but he turned out to be like every other maaaan, Our looooooove, our loooooove..."
The evil cultists were totally taken aback from the sudden visit of The Streisand and her fellow goddess, so they remained kneeled, chanting and murmuring the lyrics while lighting their lighters and holding them high in the air as the song came to a crescendo...
...which left them absolutely distracted and therefore oblivious and vulerable to our imminent attack!
DONNA: "Raining...pouring.... there's nothing left for us here... and we won't waste....ANOTHER...TEAR!"
The music got faster, acquiring a funky beat, the divas started rocking, and the X-Men who were there to rescue Bobby stealthily entered the fray!
Between two flashing lights, Ambrosius managed to see, only for a fraction of a second, a very handsome man in a g-string appearing before the altar and untying their precious sacrificial hunk! He was torn between ogling the mysterious man's butt cheeks and resuming to watching the singing duel between The Divas.
DONNA: "If you've had enough, don't put up with his stuff, don't you do it!"
Before Ambrosius could alert his cult to the diabolical ruse that was endangering them, I managed to get behind him and smack the back of his head with my hand, which had assumed the form of a non lethal, yet very cool looking frying pan! He was out cold in a second.
BABS: "If you've had your fill, get the check, pay the bill, you can do it!"
Two of the less easy to impress cult goons closer to the altar started to get up and draw their hidden handguns out, but Monique and Hellion, who still stood hidden within the trees, telekinetically snatched the guns and used them to club the goons into unconsiousness!
DONNA: "Tell him to just get out!"
BABS: "Nooooooooooothing left to talk about!"
Now all the cultists were alerted to our attack and were beggining to retaliate, but it was too late for them... having Barbra Streisand and Donna Summers right there, providing a fabulous show for them was too much of a distraction and had given us the element of surprise. This was gonna be the easiest and less bloody battle ever!
DONNA: "Pack his raincoat, show him out!"
BOTH: "Just look him in the eyes and simply shouououououout:"
Wolverine, Cyclops, Storm (who earlier used her powers to put all the torches out), Nightcrawler, Rogue and Colossus simoultaneously entered the fray, joining me in the fight, while Gerry was retreating with Bobby on his sculpted shoulders and Hellion with Monique shielded him telekinetically from anyone who could possibly shoot him at the back.
BABS + DONNA: "Enough is enough is enough! I can't go on, I can't go on, no more nooooooo!"
I turned both my hands into katanas and jumped between two cultist goons, slashing their weapons into useless metallic pieces of junk, while Colossus punched them into oblivion.
BABS+DONNA: "Enough is enough is enough I want him out, I want him out that door now!"
Nightcrawler was teleporting around, following the rythm of the beat with gusto, kicking enemies on the face with some unexpectedly tasteful dancing moves!
BABS: "I've always dreamed to find the peeeeerfect lover, but he turns out to be like every other man"
Rogue, on the other hand, was touching the fallen enemies with her bare hands just enough to make sure they'd stay down until they were all taken care of and put in a prison somewhere.
BABS+DONNA: "Our looooove (I had no choice from the start) our looooove (I've gotta listen to my heart) our loooooove (tearing us apart)..."
Cyclops calmly walked forward, releasing very accurate and collected force blasts, hitting people on the shoulder or the legs, incapacitating them. Ambrosius woke up, realised what was going on and grabbed the sacrificial dagger, throwing it straight at Mr.Summers back!
Thankfully, Logan jumped behind Cyclops and took the blow that was meant for him.
BABS+DONNA: "Enough, is enough, is enough! I can't go on, I can't go on no more noooo!"
"Logan!" Cyclops yelled as he watched his lover going down, while Storm summoned a small thunder especially to take the cult leader out.
"Don't worry, kid, you know my healing factor allows me to take the stabs meant for you anytime." Logan winked as he took the dagger out of his gut. "Now how about thanking me with a kiss?"
BABS+DONNA: "Enough, is enough, is enough! I want him out, I want him out that door NOW!"
Donna and Barbra kept singing with gusto, but now the remaining cult members had figured out that the "divas" were in reality enemies and chose to attack them instead of staying there to be taken out by this very well-coordinated team of mutants. The fools, they thought that Babs and Donna were easier to deal with!
DONNA: "Goodbye mister, goodbye, goodbye mister, goodbye sugar"
Without missing one note of her singing, "Donna" dodged the bullets coming for her and took off her stiletto heels. She threw them with incredible force at two of the cultists barging for her, stabbing their thighs with them! As the third and last cultist charged at her, she introduced his face to her foot.
BABS+DONNA: "No more tears... no more tears... no more tears... I've had it, you've had it, he's had it, we've had it enough is enough is enough is enough..."
The goons heading for Babs had no easier task ahead of them. They suddenly found their target jumping right between them with an impossible for a woman her age ninja jump, then they only had the time to see her taking her feather boa off before she wrapped it around their necks and brought their heads to bump against each other, just as she was finishing her song!
BABS: "...is enough, is ENOUGH!!!" she ended her song, putting one of her feet on the heap of unconscious cultists and flashed a triumphant smile, giving us JAZZ HANDS!
The victorious X-Men approached Barbra, as Jubilee jumped from the tree she was sitting on, giving the spotlights all that time to our fake celebrities.
"I cannot believe they took you for the real Barbra Streisand" 'Donna' said bitchily as she approached us, turning into a certain blue-skinned, traitorous redhead. "Your adam's apple was clearly showing throughout our whole performance."
"Shut it, Mystique" Lola said with obvious annoyance. "Cyclops, oh fearless leader, please switch that electrifying collar on now that we don't need that bitch's assistance anymore!" she requested.
"Please calm down, Glitter Princess." said Cyke, trying to stiffle a smile. "We only put that thing on her to make sure she'd help us out in this rescue mission without pulling any backstabbing tricks on us."
"This was probably our most flawlessly executed mission on the history of the X-Men!" Wolverine announced, clapping his hands in approval. "The duet performance you two did as a distraction wasa genius idea."
"I don't know...I woudn't call it "flawless", that's for sure" said Lola with minor humbleness. "I know there was a note or two I could have done better with during my performance."
"But your mimicry of Streisand's voice was on the spot! You did it better than Mystique, and we all kno Mystique can copy the exact voice of the person she chooses to imitate" Kurt said, excited. We all wondered how he had such good knowledge of all that is Barbra. Hmmm...
"What I would love to know is HOW exactly Mystique had anything to do with a murderous cult of insane Barbra Streisand followers... does the real Barbra know anything about this? Hell, is SHE really who they say she is?" Lola asked, her brows arching with curiosity.
Frank, our all-knowing deus ex machina, walked out of the woods to enlighten her. "She knows nothing. I checked. Those people are right out of their minds, and Barbra Streisand has no idea of the hardcoreness of those specific fans of hers. I wonder what Cher fans would do to keep her idol eternally young , though!"
I just stood there throughout that whole talk, not really bothering to comment on the bizzareness of the whole mission. I was happy that Bobby was rescued with practically no sweat, but I what bothered me right now was Bobby's state of health. He seemed kinda out of it when I saw him, plus seeing him on that altar, all set to be stabbed to death, wasn't very good for my emotional state.
Gerry suddenly appeared next to me out of nowhere with a smile. He really could get you real jumpy with those powers of his! "Bobby is fully conscious now. His powers won't function for a few hours or days, but he's perfectly fine." he announced.
I looked to my side and saw Bobby emerging out of the shadows of the trees, running towards me.
"Bobby! I smiled as I saw him extending his arms to me.
Then he passed right by me and landed on Rogue's embrace. "I thought I'd never see you again! He said, in the verge of tears." The onslaught of emotions took the best of them and Rogue ended up making out with Bobby passionately. After a couple of seconds Rogue's power kicked in again and Bobby broke the kiss.
"Shit. Now I'm all sleepy again..." he stated before slumping into unconsciousness again.
I don't know if I was emotionally crushed, dissapointed, angry at being proven wrong or just surprised that Mystique told the truth for once, but I looked right at Mystique at that time and I saw her looking back at me with a look that was a even mixture of compassion and snarkiness.
"I told you so", she whispered before walking away. "You never were an item with the real Iceman."
I looked at Rogue again, as she embraced her returned lover and placed him gently on the ground. Then I tried to see things from her perspective, and I realised that she was as deceived as I was, and maybe Mystique's infiltration costed her more than it costed me.
I mean, Mystique took her boyfriend's place, broke up with her and started dating a gay man, making her heart break even more as the blue vixen's plan progressed.
So what if my own "boyfriend" turned out something entirely different than I hoped for? It can happen to anyone, and even if tha boyfriend wasn't a mutant shape-shifter in dusguise, it could have been just another hopeful romance that turned into a dissapointment.
Mystique might have costed me a few weeks' relationship, but she costed Rogue a reltionship that was lasting against all odds for at least a year. So, I concluded that Rogue deserved to have the real Bobby, and I should come to terms with it and move on.
Frank, Lola, Monique and Gerry walked up to me and they formed a very cheesy group hug around me.
"I know what you're thinking, buddy, and let me tell you how proud I am of you. You have just grown into a more mature person." Frank conforted me.
"But in case you're still feeling the blues tonight, we can sleepover tonight and bring our ice-cream stash as well!" Monique said, offering a consolation night for me.
"You can borrow Fluffy for a week, so that you can have something to cuddle with at night!" offered Gerry.
"And if none of these things console you, Bobby can always come out as gay in the near future! May I remind you how Rogue revealed that she oftenly used her strap-on on him?" Lola wrapped up the cheer-up session!
"Thanks, you guys, I don't deserve friends like you..." I teared up, not at the bitterness over losing Bobby, but at the gung-ho attitude of my buddies to provide me with moral support.
Cyclops walked up to us to congratulate us. "That was a great first mission for you children! I know I was right to make you a honorary X-Men squad!"
"Thanks, Cyclops, sir!" we said in unison, flashing our grins.
"Now let's go back home. There are a lot of things to deal with. The new Headistress should arrive today, plus Dr.McCoy should be completing his tests on your friend Vivian as we speak."
"You do realise your timing couldn't be less convenient to me." Dead Girl grumbled with the best undead-like tone she could muster.
"I'm very sorry, Vivian, I know you really wanted to go to that rescue mission with the rest of your team, but we cannot risk sending you out there again before we know the full scope of your mutant abilities. It just wouldn't be safe for you." Hank McCoy, a.k.a. the Beast, tried to confort her, as he checked for a last time her blood test results on his lab computer.
"Safe...? SAFE?" she said, outraged. Grabbing her head from the sides with both hands, she applied a monstrous force and decapitated herself. She then threw her own head at Beast's lap, as if it was a basketball.
Her mutilated head resumed talking to him. "I can be killed a thousand times and get better within a minute. Is there anything on this planet that can be declared "dangerous" or "unsafe" to me?"
A little freaked by her casual display of powers, Beast put her Dead Girl's head back on her shoulders. "What I meant to say, is we need to know your exact nature of powers. Is it just a mutant power or is it of mystical nature as well? Is there a finite number of "deaths" you can suffer before you drop dead for good? If someone chopped you in a million little pieces and mailed them in a million different corners of the world, would they await dormant until they somehow were brought together again or would they just wither and die?"
Dead Girl casually ran her fingers through her hair. "Whatever, Doc. I'm just not comfortable with people experimenting on me. It's what killed me dead the very first time. But, fine! You wanna keep me in this mansion until your tests are completed? You got yourself a deal. Just make it quick, 'cause I wanna get out there and kick some ass!"
She walked out, where she met the rest of the gang, who had just returned from the mission.
"Yo, Vivian!" I called out to her. "What's the news from the lab?"
"So far? The news are that I am some sort of mutant undead zombie girl, with the ability to mystically regenerate a hundred times faster and more extreme than Wolverine." she responded.
"Well, that is not news at all." Frank said.
"Yeah, we figured that out the second you re-assembled yourself on that slab and ripped Sinister's heart out." Lola mentioned with a residue of grossness in her voice.
"Whatever, man. What about you, Dave? You got your boy back?" she asked.
"Kinda. We did rescue him on time, but he's not my boy anymore." I said "Apparently, he never was mine to begin with".
"I'm so sorry, man. Ben n' Jerry's, tonight, your room, okay?" she offered.
"That's what we had in mind anyway" Monique mentioned. "Feel free to join us, Vivian!"
"Yeah, I'll be there too anyway" Gerry announced. "But who's Ben?"
Trying not to laugh at our friend's silly question,we just grabbed Gerry and made him follow us into the kitchen.
"Let me explain to you over dinner, Gerry darling."
That night, the whole gang did sleepover at my room in order to cheer me up a little. However, with all the things that happened these last days and the things that we were expecting to happen, my no-relationship with Bobby was really one of the last things in my mind.
"I really hope that new Headmistress coming here tommorow will be as open-minded as Xavier was...is. I don't need no bitch telling me to attend the classes dressed as a guy instead of a girl." Lola expressed her concerns.
"Hey, when are we going to see you in non-drag clothing, anyway?" I teased.
"Come over in February, 32th and you'll see me dressed in some torn jeans and a wife-beater" she teased back.
"I know for a fact that our new headmistress, Emma Frost, is really bitchy. And that she also dresses in the classiest way a prostitute would dress." Frank exclaimed.
"Is she hot? I'm gay for slutty, strict authority figures!" Vivian asked with a certain glee in her eyes.
"You bet she is!" Frank raised his eyebrows with innuendo, only to get lightly punched on the shoulder by an irritated Monique.
"Is she going to be mean?" Gerry worried. "I hope she won't feel that our honorary X-Men status should be recalled." he added.
"Relax, guys" I said with a smile. "I promise you, Emma Frost won't bring any trouble to this team. If anything else, she might even be favourable to us in every chance she gets!"
"Why would that be?" Vivian enquired.
"Let's just say I have met her previously and she likes me a lot..I won't say anything else, guys, you'll see for yourselves tommorow!" I said, cryptically.
"That's weird." Frank raised an eyebrow. "my newly-boosted powers should know that already, but I'm not picking up anything. The power boost just comes and goes. Sometimes I even end up knowing less than before the day I...I got my power-up."
"Maybe we should get Beast to check you up on it, see if there's anything wrong." proposed Monique.
"Yeah, maybe I should get tested again." he agreed.
"I mean, getting all that sperm down your throat might macigally enhance your power, but that doesn't mean there can't be any complications!" Monique giggled.
Frank blushed intensely. "Monique...please! I don't want to recall every detail of that day like that!"
"But I do. And it's not because it bothers me, like it might bother you... I just find it extremely hot that my boyfriend has sucked every dick in this building!" she smiled mischieviously, making Frank blush even more with her vulgar description of his heroic deed.
I shot an evil look at Gerry, letting him know that we should take the joke further and watch the results it would have on Monique. From the glimmer in his eye I knew that he knew what I wanted him to do.
"And he did it really good, I must say!" Gerry happily exclaimed. He deep-throated me like a pro!"
Geez. My dick jumped a little in my pants as I brought that mental image in my mind. I had to push the game further, too, though;
"Gerry's right! I had my share of boyfriends in the past (incuding Mystique, who must be quite experienced in the shack), but my buddy Frank gave me the best blowjob I ever had, period! Which is quite impressive for a straight guy." I said in a pretentious casual manner.
We saw Frank looking at us with a face flushing with shame and anger, then we saw Monique looking at him with a face flushing with something entirely else.
"Come here, you little cocksucker!" she licked her lips, then used her telekinesis to grab Frank, rip his clothes, open the door and fly him to his own room, right next to mine!
"G'night, team!" she winked, as she unbuttoned her blouse, following Frank to the next room.
The second the door closed, I high-fived Gerry. "YAY buddy! We got him laid again!"
"Was Monique always a gay man trapped in a woman's body?" Vivian asked casually as she finished her Ben N' Jerry's.
"Oh yes."I shook my head."But I guess she didn't know about it until she found out her new boyfriend gave all these heroic blowjobs."
"He was wrong, though." said Lola. "He didn't suck ME off, so he sucked all cocks in this mansion save for one."
"Well if Monique loves boys and boys who make love to other boys, I guess that leaves no room for some girl-lovin', huh?" Vivian assumed. "Pity. She's hot."
"Vivian! I said in faux shock. "You think Monique's sexy?"
"Well, duh!"
"Don't worry, honey." Lola comforted her. "The new semester starts in a few days, so many new students are expected to join. Maybe there will be a nice goth/emo/necrophiliac lesbian girl made just for you among them."
"I fucking hope so!" was Dead Girl's response. "I either need to get laid or get out there and kick some ass real bad right now. And since the Institute won't allow me to go out on missions for a while, I guess I should find myself a girl...!"
"You're not the only one who should get laid right now, sweetie. Dave had better find some new boy to keep his mind busy too."
"Thanks, Lola, but no thanks." I said. "I just lost a boyfriend in a way fucked-up enough to make me swear off all men forever and ever...!"
"She's right, tho." Gerry put a hand on my shoulder. "Sometimes, the only way to forget a romance is to start a brand new one..!"
"I concur." Vivian said with affirmation. "Wasn't there anyone else you might have liked, before you got hooked up with fake Bobby?"
I thought really hard about it. WAS there anybody else? I remember liking Bobby when he was still with Rogue, then he came up to my room one night and had sex with me but I was so sleepy that I thought it was a dream, and afterwards I spent only one or two days searching for my Phantom Lover before hooking up with Bobby/Mystique...
...waitaminute!
The revelation I just had was so intense that I had to storm off the room with no warning or explanation to any of my friends.
Lola, Gerry and Vivian gawked at the door I left open in my hurry for a few seconds.
"Was it something I said?" Vivian looked at the other two.
"Naaah! Now who's up for a little strip poker?" Lola proposed indifferently.
"Oh, great! I'm really curious to see what's under all that glitter and make-up..." responded Vivian.
I approached the cell door and put my finger in the keyhole. I quickly made it take 500 different key forms before it got the exact right one to unlock the door, then slid in and locked the door behind me again.
I looked around the dark cell and saw nobody.
"Mystique!" I whispered. "I know this will sound like a terrible cliche, but...reveal yourself!"
No answer.
I looked up to the ceiling and saw a small bump extending from it a fraction of the second before Mystique, having assumed the color of the ceiling to blend with it, jumped on top of me intending to kick my head in.
I dodged her attack and pushed her away from me, then turned both my arms in two very sharp axes which could slice in pieces a single thread of velvet falling gently on their sharp edges.
"Stay away from me. You have no weapon and I have two." I stated matter-of-factly.
"I can always stab you with your own axes, honeybuns." her toothy smile glistened in the dark.
"I just want to ask you something. You'll gain nothing from killing me, I already locked the door behind me so you can't escape."
"I can't use you as hostage to get out of here either. I already tried to play the "nice girl" by helping you out in your rescue mission and what did I get? They just shoved me back in this fucking cage." she smiled viciously.
"Well there wouldn't be a need of the rescue mission if you hadn't put Bobby in a predicament that made him need to be rescued, you fucking stupid bitch." I snarled right back.
"Don't you call me "stupid"!" she yelled and lunged at me.
She found herself kicked hard in the stomach. The fact that I had my foot take the form of a big-ass hammer made it all the worse for her.
"You think YOU'RE the killing machine, bitch?" I yelled. "When I said I can turn my limbs into weapons, I meant ALL of them, arms and legs." I placed my deadly axe right on her neck, threatening to push further if she pulled any more tricks. "End of the line...stupid."
She sighed in exasperation, pretending that she wasn't really in any danger. "Okay, Darrington...I didn't really intend to harm you, anyway. I just wanted to rough-house you a little, 'cause I have a soft spot for you. You were the sweetest piece of ass I ever had, and I had a lot, believe me. Too bad I had to compromise my identity before I got you to give up that sweet ass to me. I love turning into a man and having twinks like you bottom for me."
I gasped. "You mean...you never fucked me?"
"Believe me, If I had fucked you, I would remember." she smiled seductively.
"It's what I intended to ask, actually. The day before you and me...became a couple, someone snuck into my room and fucked me. I really liked it, but I thought it was a dream and I didnt recall who did it. After hooking up with you-as-Bobby, I assumed it had been you."
"Well, I'm sad to admit it, but it wasn't me" she smiled. "When you mentioned it, I let you think it was me to make things easier. I couldn't have you looking for some guy that fucked you while being an item with me, it would complicate my own mission."
"Thanks for the info" I exasperated, keeping my axe-hand an inch away from her neck while I extended my other hand till the keyhole and unlocking it the same way as before. I ran to the door, then shot a last look at her before closing the door behind me.
She was still lying there on the floor, but had now taken the form of Bobby again, naked with a huge hardon.
"We can still make up for not topping you before, you know..." fake!Bobby winked at me and grabbed his cock, leaking with precum already.
I actually caught myself thinking about it for a second, then shot her a disgusted look.
"Mystique, you filthy cunt...why don't you morph into a hermaphrodite and GO FUCK YOUSELF?!?!" I yelled before slamming the door and locking it twice.
As I walked down the corridor to get out of the basement cells, I had to pass by Zazelle's holding cell. She was hanging on her door and smiled at me.
"That Mystique... she can be such a mind-fuck sometimes, can't she?" she whispered.
"I don't have time for your or her games, Zazelle. Rot in your cell for all I care." I stood there for a minute and peeked at her tv screen. "What, no more Barney marathons?" I teased.
"Nah, we went over to more hardcore territories" she exasperated. "This time, it's all eleven seasons of "7th Heaven", which is even worse than Barney. I can't tell if this show is supposed to teach me how to be a nice and kind christian who keeps being the good samaritan for those around me or a holier-than-thou asshole who keeps meddling in other people's business.
"Well, good luck with that" I scoffed, then started walking away.
"It was me, you know" Zazelle said, making me stop in my tracks.
"What did you say?" I came back, letting her know that she had my attention.
"It was me, that night...when you got fucked up the ass for the first time." she smiled.
"No way" I said in denial.
"Yes way. It was me." she nodded.
"Fuck YOU and you mindgames! You're saying that you snuck into my room and sodomised my with your strap-on while I was asleep? Then how come I found real, sweet-tasting cum into my own ass the morning after? You lying whore!" I shot her an angry look.
"That's not what I meant you blonde cliche (although it's damn hot to hear that you tasted the cum right outta your butt, you gay slut!). I meant that I MIGHT have used my powers on someone, who then got horny enough to lose control and fuck you without you knowing what was really going on... There's a chance I used my power on you, too, but I can't recall...I was a little drunk at the time." she raised an eyebrow apologetically.
I believed her. Those days, she was running around the mansion and forcing everyone to have hot gay sex, who was I to avoid her effect?
"Who was it?" I asked. "Who did you force to come fuck me?"
"I didn't force him, per se... I just used my power on him. He must have had some hidden feelings for you, because the second I put my mojo on him he walked by all those hunky, sleeping male specimens just to sneak in your room and take your anal virginity. I put the video on X-tube and it was a wild hit! It's a pity you don't bottom more often." she smiled viciously.
"You did WHAT? Who was it, Zazelle? And what exactly is the video's name?" I asked, furious with her.
"I won't tell you. Isn't it sweet? I get to rot in this cell watching hideously preachy shows, you get to suffer knowing that you're missing on a great romance! Ah, c'e la vie!" she rolled her eyes and sat on her comfy chair, resuming her viewing of "7th Heaven".
"Don't make me come in there!" I threatened.
"You come in here, I'll arm-lock you and force you into joining me in this crappy-show-marathon!" she said, giving me the finger.
I stormed out of the place furiously. I had to find a sure-fire way to make her tell me the truth. IF she was telling the truth at all... then I had to resume searching for my Phantom Lover!
I was long gone when Mystique came up to her cell door. "Hey, old boss, now I remember why I liked working with you."
"Why is that?" Zazelle asked from her comfy chair.
"You're still a newbie in villainy, but you managed to mind-fuck with the boy better than I did and you didn't even use our power to achieve that!" the blue vixen said, clapping her hands in approval...
"Thanks, Raven..." Zazelle said, before whispering to herself "...and to think that I told him the pure truth..."
I returned to my room and found the remaining gang playing cards.
It must have been strip poker, because Vivian and Gerry were completely naked and hiding their most scandalous bits with pillows, while their cloths were lying next to Lola, well, except for Gerry's g-string which Lola had put on her hair.
"Let me guess" I said, "Lola tricked you guys into playing strip poker with her."
"We wanted to see what's underneath her clothing. Now she gets to see my ass." blushed Gerry.
"Yeah, like we've never seen THAT before...!" Vivian rolled her eyes.
"I am tired of waiting" Vivian said, as we stood by the front door, the same way half the students were trying to do at the time... there was quite a commotion at the institute's gates, as well.
"Where is she? Where is she? Is she here yet?" Gerry asked impatiently.
"Relax, dummy!" I laughed. "She's just the substitute Headmistress, she's not some evil dominatrix who came here to whip your ass!" I concluded.
Emma Frost, our new Headmistress, made me look like an idiot when she came through the door with the snobbiest attitude possible and sporting a fabulous, yet incredibly slutty white leather ensemble which didn't leave much to the imagination... The other students were swarming around her, trying to get a good look at her, help her carry her bags and generally get info AND suck up to her to make their future easier.
"...you were saying?" Vivian asked ironically.
"We are doomed! Look at her! She was born to make our life a living hell and get off on it!" Gerry started panicking. What the fuck did he have for breakfast, anyway?
"I...said...RELAX!" I growled. "I told you guys we'll have no trouble with her. She's the real deal. Trust me on this, okay?"
"David?" I heard a voice behind me. I turned around and saw Emma Frost looking at me with a look that was anything but snobbish.
"What's my favourite nephew doing in this place? Come to Auntie Emma!" she said, opening her arms and embracing me with warmth.
"Hey Auntie Emma." I said with a casual yet warm voice.
"I didn't know you were attending this School! I swear, your mother needs to call sometime and catch up with me on things." she said, as she kissed both my cheeks. I could feel that the rest of the gang were watching us in a total "What The Fuck?" manner.
"It's not her fault Grandpa denounced her and you don't bother to leave Britain that often." I explained.
"I did this time. Listen, I really need to go get my things inside and get comfy, but we'll catch up later, yes? Oh, this is so exciting! I thought I wasn't going to like it here and the children all looked like brats, but now I know I'll make a good Headmistress here."
"Of course, Auntie Emma. Go take care of your stuff, I'll see you later." I smiled.
"Oh, and one more thing." She said, before walking away. "Tell your friends not to be afraid of me, their projected uncomfort is crowding my mind." she motioned at her temple.
As she left, I turned around and gave a smug look at my friends, who were looking with their mouths agape. "Well, I TOLD you not to worry, didn't I?"
The new semester has began, and many new faces could be seen around.
The very first day I met this really cute green-eyed brunette with a really interesting power.
"Hey. I'm Jamie Madrox. Nice to meet you."
"Nice to meet you too", I shook hands with him. "I'm Dave Darrington, a.k.a the Gay Guy Who Can Turn His Limbs Into Swords And Stuff. Or "Meleee", which is the short version of that."
"Cool! Wanna see what my power is? Slap my hand." he proposed.
"No way dude, I don't feel like getting electrocuted or something, you strike me as the "practical jokester" type." I exclaimed.
"Just do it. You won't get hurt, I promise." he smiled.
I slapped his hand and something extraordinary happened. Jamie was split in two identical Jamies!
"Any slight blunt hit I might get creates a dupe out of me." he explained. "And same goes for my dupes" he added, slapping his dupe, which promptly created another dupe out of his initial dupe.
"What the fuck? Just because you created me, doesn't mean you have to use me however you like! The Constitution mentions that all people are equals, no matter of how they came to be!" the first dupe nagged.
Jamie turned to me. "See? Every single one of these dupes is practically an exxagerated aspect of my personality. This one should symbolize the part of me who was very inspired by the stuff learned by that dupe I sent to Law School and then absorbed back with all that kowledge."
The second dupe was much more pissed though. "You want a piece of us? Huh, PUNK?" he said, and attacked the original Jamie. The two of them tumbled on the floor, and each punch produced more and more dupes.
After a minute, I could see forty Jamies fighting each other all over the place.
"MADROX!" I head another voice. "Are you fighting with yourself again? Stop that!"
A cold, yet very beautiful woman jumped beside me and stoically flipped her hair. She had medium length black hair, some high tech-looking red shades and two weird tear-like tattoos under each eye. "We have to stop him." she told me. "My calculations prove that if he doesn't stop, in 2 minutes and 45 seconds his dupes will reach such a number that their fighting will bring this building down."
"Who the hell are you, again?" I asked, not realising the danger Jamie was to us at the moment.
"Oh. I'm Sage. Good to meet you." she introduced herself without even smiling. Her face was stone-cold.
"What the hell is going on here? Is it my idea, or am I witnessing an incestuous orgy between 50 identical siblings?" Lola jumped in.
"No, Lola!" I said. "They're all kinda the same guy, with a power to create semi-crazy dupes outta himself. And now they're kinda fighting each other and if they keep doing that, they'll keep multiplying until the mansion is brought down!" I tried to summarise the situiation as best as I could.
"Oh. So it's more of a massive masturbation rather than an incestuous orgy. I see." she answered, then stood there and thought about it.
"They're not even having sex, Lola! We gotta stop them! I'd smack them around, but it would only make things worse!" I urged.
"Okay. This will need a special trick." Lola said tongue-in-cheek.
She did a major Xena-style flip above the fighting dupes and her hands started glowing. Then she screamed "BUKKAKE GLITTER!" and her hands started producing copious amounts of her glitter, only in an extra-dense glue-like form, which she shot all over the room, hitting the dupes in the face, if she was able to.
"Jeez!"
"That's gross" the dupes started yelling.
They all gradually calmed down and soon, we had a room full of Jamies, trying to get the sticky shiny liquid out of their clothes. The original Jamie was then able to absorb everybody and set things right.
"Now get to work, Madrox. My calculations say you'll only need two hours and 24 minutes to clean the entire room from all of that junk." Sage announced, threw him a broom and left.
"Who the hell is she, anyway?" asked Lola.
"Sage? Our new exchange teacher. Her power is that she's practically a living computer." Madrox explained.
"Really? I wouldn't wanna be around her when she starts crashing and presenting blue screens. LOL!" our beloved tranvestite punned.
"Yet, her math still suck anyway." He answered. "She said I'd need 144 minutes to get this chore done, yet I'm betting I'll need much less." he added, as he tapped his foot on the floor five times. That action reproduced five dupes holding as many brooms, who then obediently started cleaning the place up. Madrox Prime put his hands behind his head and yawned.
"You know, your power should be amazing when used at bed..." Lola raised an eyebrow cheekily.
"I concur!" I said all too happily, imagining myself being serviced by ten of Jamie's sexy dupes.
"I know that for a fact, baby." Jamie teased. "But unfortunately, I'm straight. Don't lose hope tough, they say that every man has a little gay in himself, so you might encounter a gay dupe of mine someday!" he winked, before sitting on an armchair to rest and wait out his dupes, who did everything for himself.
Wanting to find more about my so-called "Phantom Lover" after Zazelle's disclosure, I decided to ask Lola if she might know anything. Yeah, yeah, I know I should have asked Frank straight ahead, but I just couldn't walk up to him and ask him if he knows who took my anal virginity all those nights ago!
I walked into the informary searching for my dearest drag buddy, and found her practising her singing skills... over Magneto's comatose body!!!
"I could stay awake just to hear you breathing Watch you smile while you are sleeping Far away and dreaming..." she sang.
"What the hell, Lola?" I interrupted.
"Oh! You startled me!" she said, abruptly interrupting her song. She walked up to her karaoke machine and turned it off. "What brings you here, Davey darling? I'm sure you didn't suddenly decide to visit the sick and comatose of this jolly mansion..."
"I wanted to find you, Lola. But since I'm here anyway, what's the deal with you singing to Magneto?" I inquired.
"I'm not just singing to Magneto, you dummy!" she explained. "I wanted to practise for the upcoming Karaoke Contest we talked about, and doing it in my room was bothering the neighbors... I then tried to ask Storm if I could practice in her private garden again, but she said that her flowers don't like my or her singing anymore...they're more into haiku nowadays. Then I thought about this section of the infirmary. Professor Xavier, plus Magneto and those ex-Brotherhood baddies are sleeping indefinitely in here. The doctors, including Beast, who's in charge of this sector, say it's good to talk to the patients because most time they can hear us and might react to what they hear, so I thought "why the hell not? These poor souls need someone to pay attention to them and I wanna practice for the contest, so why not sing to them?"
"That's actually not such a bad thought" I said.
"Yeah, I believe her horrible singing might wake up Xavier from his coma! You go girl!" a snarky voice was heard behind us.
It was Surge, team leader of Storm's group of students! She's a rather pretty Japanese girl with purplish-blue hair and some whacked up electrical powers she couldn't control, so she has to wear some steampunk-looking metallic gloves all day. All that package makes for a sometimes bitchy, aggressive character.
"What the hell are you doing here, Noriko?" Lola asked her in a bitchy tone.
"I was just visiting Professor X, but I guess you were so caught up in your shrieking that you never noticed me." she responded. "I swear, I don't get you guys."
"And why is that, pray tell?" I said with a raised eyebow.
"The new semester has just began. Our new Headmistress will soon announce the new line-ups for the battle teams every teacher will be in charge of, and a sort of Battle League will be formed, with many benefits for the group of students that beats it. Every other student is practicing their asses off in the Danger Room these days, trying to be in their best form and get picked by someone important, like Wolverine or Storm...and you guys, who used to be Cyclops team and rather powerful, I must admit, just hang around and practice for a retarted gay karaoke contest?" she ranted, barely taking small breaks to breathe.
"Well, what can I say, I guess we're the artsy types...!" scoffed Lola.
"Yeah!" I added. "Not to mention that after single-handedly saving the world, we have become honorary X-Men, so I doubt we're even gonna feature in your lame Kiddies League...!" I resulted, showing Noriko the full length of my tongue.
"You guys are so immature AND stuck-up snots!" she said.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Now go pick your nose or something...oh, wait, you can't even do THAT with those lame gloves!" said Lola, making Surge give us the finger and then leave.
"What a betch" we said in unison.
"So, honey, what did you want me for?" Lola reminded me of the reason for my visit.
"You remember that night you bedded Colossus?" I tried to bring her back to the day I wanted to ask her about.
"Well, DUH! What, you wanna know how big he was?" she smiled sluttily.
"No... thanks." I rolled my eyes, trying to look annoyed and NOT freaked, otherwise she'd realise I already knew how big Colossus was! LOL!
"Than what?" she said indifferently, looking to adjust some settings on her karaoke machine.
"Well, I wanted to ask...if you noticed anything out of the ordinary that night." I said. I wasn't sure I wanted Lola to know I got deflowered that night.
"You mean except for the fact that a total hottie gladly offered to "rape" me that night? Nope."
"Nobody else had a similar behavior? Never saw anyone suspiciously walking around where my room is?" I bit my lip saying that last one thing.
"What is this leading up to?" Lola said with suspicion. "Davey darling, is there something you wanna talk about...? ...You know you can tell Aunt Lola anything."
"Nah, never mind. Thanks, anyway!" I said and left the room with haste, arousing more suspicion from her side. What was I thinking? Lola had just fucked with Piotr that day, she must have spent the rest of the night reminiscing on her bed, basking in her afterglow!
Gah! Now she was on to me....
"Are you anxious about the singing contest?" I asked Gerry as we walked down the hall, looking to go get some breakfast.
"A little, maybe. But the song we chose to sing together is a great one, and we'll work well together!" he smiled.
"I bet we will, buddy!" I said, rubbing his shoulder. He gave me a cute smile, which then to an expression of sheer terror, and all of a sudden... Gerry went intangible AND invisible, and all that was left was his discarder cloths on the floor. He must have seen something scary behind me!
I turned around, ready for anything, and saw who was standing behind me.
It was a very large and tall, extremely sexy, green-skinned woman, wearing a very expensive suit.
"Jennifer Walters!" I said, ogling her.
"You know me with my real name? That's rare.... most kids your age know me by "She-Hulk"! she said with surprise.
"Hey! Not. A. Kid!" I said prissily. "I might have not turned 21 yet, but I've had enough sexual misadventures to make you blush, lady!"
She-Hulk raised an eyebrow. "Maybe we should compare notes someday... THEN we'll see who will be doing the blushing. Anyway, can you show me to Miss Frost's office? There is a serious matter who needs to be adressed."
I turned all of my fingers into deadly kitchen knifes. "Have you come to beat my aunt Emma up?" I snarled.
"Worse." she said matter-of-factly. "When I'm not a superhero, I'm the best lawyer in superhuman cases, and I've come here representing my V.I.P. client..." she added, stepping aside to reveal the very well-known diva who stood behind her all that time...
...Donna Summers!
"Word is that your X-Men illegally used one of my copyrighted songs AND my image a few days ago..." she told me with a cold voice, "...and I've come here to sue your ass!!!"
TO BE CONTINUED!
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