I'd rather you didn't repost this story anywhere without my permission, usual warnings about laws and such apply, don't read if you shouldn't.
Also, if you're looking for a story with a lot of sex, look elsewhere. There's no sex in this chapter, and probably not in the next one either. But if you're looking for a decent story, then read on.
-=Elliott=-
I stared out of the window as the Jeep bounced down the side of the gully, trying not to look at Devon beside me. He didn't seem to notice, but I actually found it awkward being alone with him in the tight confines of the little truck. It wasn't his fault, he hadn't done anything at all. It's just... he was so fucking perfect.
When I had come out as gay the previous year, he had been my friend since first grade. We were as close as brothers, and I was so scared that he would reject me and I would lose him as a friend. But he had just given me a big hug and told me that he didn't care. But I wanted him to care. I had first known I was gay BECAUSE of him. He was drop dead gorgeous, without ever trying to be. I know he doesn't know it, since he barley ever even looks in the mirror and seems to be immune to the whole high-school-self-image-crisis thing. He's a few inches taller than my 5'8", and he has the lean hard body of an athlete. I know he goes for a jog almost every morning and runs for miles. He has raven black hair that's always a little messy, but it's a good style, the kind that most people have to work at for hours to get. His hair stops just above his emerald eyes. They're the greenest eyes I have ever seen, and every time I see them I just want to stare into them forever.
He's smart two, and I know he'll be successful at whatever he wants to do, be it this psychology thing or even if he turns around and decides he wants to be an astronaut. He's charming and has a great sense of humor, and everyone loves him. But it never goes to his head, he's never part of the 'popular crowd', but rather is happy to exist as everyone's friend.
But he's completely sexually oblivious. I've never even seen him look at a girl, or guy for that matter, lustfully. Which is a problem because I'm fairly certain he's the love of my life. I've had a crush on him since I could masturbate. Things were going well when he hooked up me and Chris, because I had someone to take my mind off him. I really had loved Chris, but not to the same degree I loved Dev. I think part of the reason why Chris had broken it off with me is because he knew how I felt about Devon, and I hang out with Devon at least once a week. But now Chris was gone and the emotional buffer is no more, and my long buried feelings are resurfacing. What the fuck am I going to do now?
I caught my reflection in the side view mirror as Devon pulled to a stop outside the forest. My brown hair was still impeccably styled, and it framed a very fine boned face. My eyes starred back at me, almost yellow in the setting sun. Depending on the light my eyes could be anywhere from brown to an almost glowing amber. I knew I was handsome. I liked to think I wasn't vain, but I was aware of how I looked, and I cared very much about my appearance. Not as handsome, as Devon though, as my eyes caught him sauntering around to the front of his truck, his thick chest pulling his T-shirt tight about his torso, and his strong chin jutted outwards. He took a deep breath of fresh, clean air and threw me a devilish smile. Like I said, fucking perfect. I could die happy if he was giving me that smile, and like I always did, I started smiling too just because he was. But the pain was still there, because he didn't know how much he completed me.
I gestured for him to follow me into the rapidly darkening woods. We walked in silence for awhile, just enjoying each other's company, and looking at woods. It truly was a little piece of paradise, and I had never brought anyone here before. The path was thin in a lot of places and I let Devon lead, just so I could watch him move. His fluid grace as he seemed to float over the ground, the way he bent his body to get around protruding branches, the slight sheen of perspiration on his forehead. The woods were nice too, but I could never get tired of looking at Devon. I had watched him grow from a little boy almost into a man, and he only got more perfect as time passed. Suddenly the forest opened up to reveal a glistening pond, which was reflecting the sunset in a dazzling array of colors. The water was perfectly clear, and looked like a cool contrast to the hot dry air.
I turned to head back to the truck but Devon put a gentle hand on my shoulder, sending shivers down my spine. He wasn't big on physical contact so I relished the little touches I would occasionally be graced with. I turned and looked into the two glowing emeralds.
"Want to go for a quick swim?" He smiled an impish grin.
"But we don't have any swim trunks..." I said doubtfully.
He rolled his eyes and sighed at me."This sounds like the opening scene to a bad porno. Come on man, we grew up together, I've seen you naked a hundred times. Swim?"
I carefully weighed my options; For one thing, I hadn't seen him naked since we were like 11, and QUITE a bit changes on a guys body from 11 to 16. I may never get the chance to see him naked again though, but what if I got hard or did something else embarrassing? I looked into his big green eyes and that captivating smile made me blush and mutter an "Fine, but just for a bit."
He widened his smile and ripped off his shirt, exposing his flawlessly hairless chest and my eyes drifted inevitably down past his quarter sized nipples to his perfect eight pack. Just...damn. I could already feel my cock hardening. He didn't seem fazed at all by my inaction and undid the top button of his jeans, kicked off his shoes and socks, then pulled off his pants too. His legs had a light smattering of black hairs below the knees, but he appeared to be hairless above, but his boxers were obscuring my view of the main event.
To try and make it seem like I wasn't just staring, I pulled my own shirt off and started to slowly take off my shoes. Unabashedly he pushed his boxers down and I almost fell over. He was hung like a fucking stallion. My frequent jerk off fantasies hadn't prepared me for the dangling prize before me. He had a well trimmed patch of hair above his cock, and it had to be at least 6 inches long soft, with egg sized balls hanging pendulously beneath. I only got to look for a few seconds before he spun and leapt into the water. I turned away from him so he wouldn't see that I had a full blown erection at this point and stripped down the rest of the way before quickly jumping after him. We swam around for a good twenty minutes, just enjoying the invigorating feeling of being naked in 'public' and letting the water caress our sweaty skin.
A little while later found us laying side by side on the grass next to our discarded clothing gazing up at the stars. Fortunately my body had settled down and I was able to remain soft while we lay there waiting to dry off.
"Can you read to me a little?" I asked, as I often did when we found ourselves in some quiet place just him and me. I would call it romantic, but he probably just thought it was nice time spent with his 'friend'. But I cherished these times, especially when I got to listen to his silky, deep voice recite one of the books he had memorized. He thought of himself as a bit of a freak because of his memory, but I just found it amazing.
-=Devon=-
I didn't answer Elliott at first, simply because I was a little lost in the stars above. We didn't have a book with us of course, but I had almost perfect recall of everything I had ever read, so for me to "read" to him was just me reciting a book. I don't know why he liked it so much, but he could listen for hours. Most people outside of my mom, Elliott and John didn't know just how amazing my memory was, because frankly it was kind of freakish, but Elliott got it and only asked for this when we were alone. I thought for a second, then decided on Dante's Inferno. Elliott wasn't stupid by any means, but he didn't really understand Dante's work, but he seemed to enjoy the simple drone of my voice more than the words themselves. And with Dante's work being full of overused, frivolous words since it was translated from archaic Latin, it was easy to get lost in the sound more than the words.
" Midway upon the road of our life I found myself within a dark wood, for the right way had been missed. How hard a thing it is to tell what this wild and rough and dense wood was, which in thought renews the fear. So bitter is it that death is little more. But in order to treat of the good that there I found, I will tell of other things that I have seen there..."
When I recited word for word, without really thinking about what I was saying, I could almost let me mind wander. I had probably gotten through about 50 pages worth when I heard gentle snoring beside me. I let my voice trail off gently and looked at Elliott, fast asleep in the grass beside me. He had a beautiful body, smooth and hairless and tanned golden brown through a gift of genes. His features were delicate and he had the most intriguing eyes I had ever seen. He looked peaceful in sleep, alluring even.
I hadn't really given much thought to sexuality. I was more concerned about the future, and the acquisition of knowledge than anything else. I masturbated, just like any healthy kid my age, and I even watched porn sometimes, but it was always straight porn. I was enough of an outcast as it was, always liked by everyone but never really accepted by any them. I didn't need to be gay on top of that, but looking at Elliott laying like that, all I wanted to do was reach over and stroke his chest, run my fingers through his hair and plant a soft kiss on his lips.
But honestly, even if I was gay, I don't think I could ever date him. He was my best friend, my confident, my brother in all but blood. No, I could never be with him. I couldn't resist touching his skin though, it looked so soft... I gently place my hand on his warm chest and whispered in his ear.
"Wake up man, time to go home."
I gently rubbed his chest and he slowly came awake. He looked at me groggily and smiled. I realized my hand was still caressing his chest and drew it away quickly before I clambered to my feet, offering him a hand up. He took it and we wordlessly got dressed and walked back to my truck.
We spoke almost not at all on the way home, but it wasn't an uncomfortable silence, just the happy quiet of two friends who don't need to fill the car with mindless chatter. I dropped him off at his house a few blocks away from mine and drove home.
It was 11pm now, and since it was Friday, mom would be home around 12. I remembered that I had an important day tomorrow and had a quick shower and climbed into bed, excited to meet with James Westbough and see if I could make some headway where all the trained professionals had failed. I tried not to have any high expectations, but couldn't help myself. Wouldn't it be fantastic if I made some amazing breakthrough and actually got somewhere with this young man?
-=James=-
This is going to go nowhere.
I sighed as Manny led me through the maze of hallways to the meeting room where this shrink would sit me down and ask a whole bunch of questions, none of which I would answer since I didn't fucking TALK. Then they would ask me to fill out some survey, I would doodle random pictures for an hour, then they would take it back with a disgusted look, and stroll out the door, and I would go back to my room.
I still smelled a little funky from my morning run. They had a strict health program here and every day I had to work out at least for a little while, since I didn't get to walk around and do normal stuff like a normal person. I had decided to forgo showering, belligerently hoping that a little BO would throw off the asshole who was undoubtedly here to patronize me some more.
Manny lead the way through the door and gestured for me to take a seat behind a big steel table. I didn't need to look to know that all the edges were replaced by smooth curves. I missed edges and corners on things, sounds stupid but hell, I missed a lot of stuff. I sat there for probably about five minutes before I heard the door open up behind me. I sighed audibly and looked at the table, not even bothering to glare at the shrink. I listened to him pull out the chair on the other side of the table, but still didn't look up. I was wearing a white hoodie (All my clothes were white, never really figured out why) and I used it to shadow my face. I was very self conscious of my scars, and I didn't like people staring at them. Almost the whole left side of my body was covered in horrendous burn scars. Well, I guess most of them would be from the skin grafts AFTER the burns, but it still made me hideous to look at. The right side of my face was normal, but there was an almost perfect sloping line across my face where my normal skin ends and the new imperfect skin begins.
I heard him clear his throat loudly and I glanced up, meaning to just throw one of my trademark looks his way and go back to sulking, but he caught my eyes.
Bear in mind, I've been locked up since I was 11. Well, at least detached from the world since then, but I haven't seen anyone near my age that's normal in years. The boy in front of me however was just beautiful. His raven hair was swept off to one side, and he wore a blazer like he was born into it, with just a white shirt underneath. He was still standing and my gaze settled on his eyes. Eyes like the trees I used to see all the time around my house. Like the woods I played in as a kid. They were... amazing.
I felt a weird sensation in my groin, and a sudden wave of shame over my appearance. He was so perfect, and I was so ugly. I didn't want to talk to him. Why couldn't he just be an old man like all the other doctors that came to see me, I used my looks as a weapon against them, but I just wanted to hide from him. I looked down again and tried to disappear into my hood.
-=Devon=-
I stopped before I walked into the room and looked through the window set in the door. I couldn't see his face, but the tight white pants and jacket he was wearing gave a good view of the person I had been thinking about to the exclusion of all else for the past week. He was lean, and looked almost as tall as I was. His muscles were well defined, as I expected after learning about the fitness regime they told me he was on. A hood covered his head, but I could see a couple white hairs sticking out from the garment. With my curiosity buzzing, I pushed through the door and try to appear confident as I walked into the room. I needn't have bothered, since he didn't even look up as I walked around the table to stand opposite him. I pulled out the chair and loudly cleared my throat, trying to make him look up so I could see into the shadow that was covering his face.
He did look up, and I almost gasped. Well, throw some glitter on me and call me queer, he was the most beautiful person I had ever seen. His hair was short, and seemed to naturally spike at the front, it's pure white color making it seem like ice. His features were fine boned but strong at the same time, and I could see a quick flash of perfect white teeth through his slightly open mouth. His eyes were almost silver, and they seemed to swirl when I looked into them. There was the faintest scar running from the hairline above his right eye all the way down his face, disappearing into his jacket, since he wore no shirt beneath it. Instead of it being ugly, it actually made him even more attractive, like a book with some frayed edges always seems more inviting then a brand new one. I found myself wondering what his skin would feel like, how it would taste to follow that scar with my tongue. I wonder how far down it went...
Our eyes seemed to lock for a long time, or maybe it just felt that way, before he quickly looked away. I stood there for a moment before asking if he minded sitting down with me. The faintest of nods was my answer and I took a seat.
"So... umm. Hi, my names Devon."
He looked up at me and the light caught his eyes. With those swirling, unblinking eyes and the shadows shading his face, I felt suddenly unsure of myself.
"I'm kind of apprenticing to a real doctor, but I'm not one, being only sixteen and all and I was supposed to ask you a whole bunch of questions and I memorized the questionnaire before I got here but I seem to be having trouble remembering them, which is weird since I don't usually forget anything, ever, I actually have a really good memory for stuff I read so it's really odd that... I... umm. Yeah."
I was having trouble with words at the time. It all just seemed to be rushing out and I was having a hard time not talking. He never blinked, just kept up that smoldering look. God how would those eyes look while his mouth was wrapped around my... Fuck. Why was I thinking these things! The kid was suicidal and hated everything. I was probably at the bottom of his shit list right now. I felt the blood rushing to my cheeks and I made myself take a deep breath before trying again.
"So anyways. On my way here I was reviewing the questions and your file, and I'm not sure what they expect of me since you don't answer verbal questions, and you never respond to written questionnaires. In fact it said that you usually just draw all over them. So I brought a sketch pad and a pencil, and I was wondering if you wanted to just sit and chat for a bit, as it were. I can ask yes or no questions, and you can just nod or shake your head. Does that sound better than me just rattling off some random shit that you've probably heard a thousand times?"
After I finished I saw a slight smile creep onto his lips, but he still made no move to let me know if he was into the idea or not.
"Well, either way, I have to spend an hour here with you. Here's the drawing stuff. I'll just talk and you can draw whatever you want since I bet you don't get to do that often."
I slid the pad and pencil across the table and started talking. I talked about myself and how I grew up. I left out a great many details and just stuck to the mundane, since I knew that this conversation was being recorded five ways to Sunday, but I hated the silence of the room. Hell, Elliott liked my voice, maybe James would too. He covered the paper with his arm so I couldn't see what he was doodling, but he appeared to be listening while he drew. After about an hour of sitting in the room with him, I was running out of things to discuss. I had talked about my love of words, about being bumped forwards a grade for the first time and leaving my friends behind, and I told him about Elliott. Talking about Elliott made me wonder about James sexuality.
He had been either unconscious or incarcerated through puberty, and now he had never really come into contact with kids his age, which is the usual trigger for someone's sexual urges. I wonder if he even jacked off? Had he ever fantasized about anything? I wanted to ask him but knew it would be pointless, and he probably wouldn't appreciate having it brought up here with people watching and listening.
Eventually our time was up and I stood. I reached across and picked up the pencil then went to grab the pad as well, but he drew it closer to him and looked at me pleadingly. I smiled and said "You can keep it. It's been nice sitting down with you James, bye."
My farewell seemed kind of lame to me, but I didn't know what else to say. As I walked away from him I heard a faint 'Goodbye', and then I was out the door and into the hall again. I was about to start the long trek through the facility to the parking lot, when I caught the dumbfounded look on the male nurses face outside the door. His mouth was actually open and he was staring at me wide eyed.
I glanced at myself to make sure nothing was amiss then met his gaze and asked "What? Did I do something wrong?"
My question was met with initial silence until finally he said "I've been that boys caretaker for two years. He has never said a word. Not. A. Single. Word. Some of the greatest names in psychology have talked with him and none of them have gotten anywhere. He doesn't talk in his sleep like some of our other mutes, and he barley even breathes loudly. He said goodbye to you. He SAID goodbye. Do you have any idea what you've done?!"
I shrugged my shoulders, unsure of how to respond.
"You've gotten through to him! Are you planning on coming back? Will you meet with him again?"
I wanted to instantly say that I would, that I would pay money to be in the same room with him, that if I could just look at him for a little longer I would feel fulfilled. But I settled for "I hope so." then headed out to my truck to start the long drive home, my mind awhirl with possibilities.
-=James=-
"Goodbye"
The door closed behind him with an air of finality that seemed to resonate within me. The first word I had said in years and it had to be a goodbye. I didn't want him to leave, I wanted him to stay and keep talking. About his mom, or his best friend. I liked the way his eyes softened when he talked about the guy named Elliott, you could tell he meant a lot to him. I wanted to stay in the room and just breath in the lingering smell that Devon had left floating on the air. But I knew that my life just didn't work like that. If it was good, it was quickly gone, and it would never come back.
I quickly folded the sketch I had made so that no one would see it, then waited for Manny to come take me back to my room.
He acted a little weird I thought, but I was too wrapped up in images of Devon sitting across from me that I paid it no heed. Eventually I was alone in my room again and I slumped down on my bed. I just couldn't stop thinking about that boy. His features were perfect, and I felt like his emerald eyes had stolen a bit of my soul. I wanted to see him again, I wanted to touch him. To hold him. To... kiss him?
I had never really given much thought to my bodily changes. I grew some hair and got bigger down there, but so did the rest of me. I vaguely remember some of the older boys in school talking about 'jacking off' but I had never learnt what they meant. I had nothing to be attracted too here, and the only person I ever really saw was Manny. But seeing Devon had stirred something inside me, made me swell in places I wasn't used to swelling. I gently pulled apart the sketch and looked at my drawing. I had always been a great artist, and despite not getting much practice I think I had done a great job of this sketch.
Devons face looked back at me from the page and I wished I could color in his eyes. I wished with all my heart that I could see him again.
Thanks for reading, there will be more!!
I appreciate constructive criticism, and everyone loves compliments, send me an email at m-davidson@hotmail.ca