Struggle to See Each Other Again

Published on May 7, 2009

Gay

Struggle to See Each Other Again Chapter 2

Chapter Two

            Wearing only his boxers, Ryan lay on his bed trying so hard to get to sleep. However his mind was preoccupied with many different thoughts, all rushing through at once. “Why am I so happy around him? Why does it feel like something is missing when he is not there? He is just a friend. Besides it’s not like I’m gay…am I?” Ryan though. In frustration he violently turned on his side, causing the whole bed to shake. Looking over at his nightstand clock, he realized that is was already past three in the morning. “Fuck” he hissed silently. Closing his eyes, he tried to block all the thoughts out of his mind and concentrate on sleep.

Suddenly there was a loud thud at his window, startling him so much he almost fell out of the bed. Looking over at his window he could not make anything out in the darkness of night. Again he heard the thud, this time louder. His mouth felt dry, and his heart started to beat faster. With a sudden flash of lightning, he saw a dark figure looming outside his window. Fear rushed over him; he tried to move, but he was like a statue, set still forever in time. Another flash of lightning erupted in the dark stormy night, flashing enough light for Ryan to make out a face.

As soon as he recognized who that face belonged to, all his fear melted away. Rushing out of bed, as if it were on fire, Ryan ran over to his bedroom window and opened the window. Quickly the figure crawled in from the freezing cold rain outside. A gust of cold air blew over Ryan’s almost completely naked body, causing his nipples to harden almost instantly. John stood in front of Ryan, completely drenched. His clothes hugged his body tightly; allowing Ryan to see every curve and muscle of his lean body. Ryan felt a strange desire to reach out and slide his hand over John’s chest.

            “What are you doing here?” Ryan asked in disbelief.

            “I had to come see you, Ryan. I needed to tell you something.”

            “What is it?”

            “I…I….” John began, but then looked away quickly.

            “What is it? John you’re my friend. You can tell me.” He said.

Looking deep in Ryan’s amber eyes, John leaned in and put his soft lips to Ryan’s. At first Ryan was taken aback, but within a few seconds he parted his mouth and let John’s tongue slip in. Wrapping his arms around John’s waist, he lead him to his bed and fell back; taking John with him. Ryan loved the sensation of John’s wet body on top of his bare torso. After a bit of making out, Ryan pushed John up a little and slid his hands down John’s wet shirt and pulling it up once he reached the bottom. John peeled off his wet shirt and than leaned back down to kiss Ryan. Ryan slid his hands over John’s back, pulling him closer as his fingertips slide over every inch of his soft wet skin. Heat was radiating off of Ryan’s body and quickly keeping John’s wet chest warm. Breaking the kiss, Ryan looked deep into John’s eyes and then seeing a few droplets of water run down John’s neck, he leaned in and licked the droplets. As soon as Ryan’s tongue touched the sensitive area by the side of John’s neck, John let out a loud moan of pleasure.

Ryan could feel John’s hard cock jabbing him in his stomach; and wanting more, he pulled John even closer. Slowly John lowered his right hand, brushing gently against Ryan’s sensitive abs. Ryan let out a sigh when he felt John’s cold hand gripping his throbbing hard cock. Sliding his tongue back into Ryan’s mouth, John started stroking harder and harder; faster and faster. With every stroke, Ryan felt like he would faint; the sensation was intense. Suddenly the pressure in his balls was extreme; his balls tightened as cum flew from his cock with force.

Ryan opened his eyes and confused looked around the room. He was alone in the complete darkness, a storm blowing outside. “Just a dream.” He thought. Feeling something wet drip down his leg, Ryan lowered his hand down his sweaty chest and abs, and slipped it inside his boxers. He discovered the large load of cum he had sprayed in his boxers. “Damn. This is the biggest load I ever shot. Oh fuck. Wait? It was because of John.” He thought. “No. I can’t be gay. And he isn’t either. Is he? Am I?”

Leaning back, he closed his eyes and again tried to catch some shut eye before his alarm woke him.  As he was finally drifting off to sleep, the blaring noise of the alarm clock woke him. Groggily he got out of bed, and made his way to the adjacent bathroom, closing the door behind him. Turning on the hot water and sliding off his boxers, he stepped into the shower. Hot water cascaded down his body, flowing off every curve and definition of his body. Ryan looked down as the water washed away the dried cum off his thighs; taking with it any trace of what happened the night before. Leaning forward he rested his head against the foggy wall, letting the water lightly massage his back. “What does all this mean?” He thought. Sighing, he turned off the water and stepped out. Grabbing a towel, he walked out of the towel, dried off and wrapped the towel around his waist. Looking in the mirror, Ryan spent twenty minutes trying to style his hair just perfect. “Excellent.” He said, as he finally finished.

After getting dressed, Ryan walked downstairs to see his sister already sitting at the breakfast table, sipping on her coffee.

“Hey Michelle.” He greeted her.

“Hey RyGuy.” She answered smiling, “Mom and Dad left early for work.”

“Oh Ok.” He said, grabbing a slice of toast out of the pantry and putting it in the toaster.

“So the weather finally improved.” Michelle said. “So you excited for the movie tonight.”

“Yeah I am. Hey is it ok that John goes? I kinda invited him.”

“John…whose John?”

“A friend. He is in my history class.”

“Yeah. No problem. If he doesn’t mind hanging with your big sis.”

“No. He’s a great guy. You’ll like him.” Ryan said, taking the last bite of his toast.

“Ok. Well I have to get to work. I’m working until 8, so I will just meet you at the movies. Ok?”

“Ok. Bye Sis.”

Ryan quickly finished his breakfast; and after swallowing the last gulp of orange juice, he was out the door on his way to school.

************************************************************************

            Rummaging through his locker, Ryan was oblivious to what was going on around him. All the noise of multiple conversations, students walking to class, locker doors opening and closing, girls gossiping, and guys catcalling was completely lost to Ryan. He kept thinking back to the dream and what it meant.

It wasn’t until he felt a strong hand rest on his shoulder, that his concentration was shattered. Turning around, Ryan’s eyes met the hazel eyes of John. The light was shinning on him just right to make his brown hair seem lighter than it really was.

            “Hey you ok?” John asked smiling at Ryan. Ryan couldn’t help but feel something inside of him; something that made him happy every time he saw that smile.

            “Yeah. Sorry I was just thinking.” Ryan quickly answered.

            “Oh. About what?”

            “Ummm nothing…..the project.”

            “Yeah. We need to finish that soon.”

            “Yeah. We do…hey I was thinking….you could…I mean if you want…you could…stay over. We could finish the project in the morning. If you want.” Ryan said, having no idea why it was so hard for him to ask John.

            “Are you sure your parent’s wouldn’t mind?” John asked.

            “No. They would be ok with it. I mean it is for school.”

            “Ok. Sure. I will ask my parents when I get home.”

            “Ok. Cool.”

            “Hey, I have to go finish some work in the library before school, I’ll see ya in Jensen’s.”

            “Ok. Cool. See ya.” Ryan said smiling. Watching John walk away, Ryan got a rush of sadness through his entire body. “What is that?? Why am I sad when he is gone?” He thought. Putting these thoughts to the back of his mind, like so many others, Ryan grabbed his things out of his locker and walked to the outdoor quad. Ryan looked down at his watch as he was walking and realized he still had another twenty minutes before class began. Sitting down at an empty table at the end of the quad, he pulled out his math book, and started doing the last two problems he didn’t finish the night before.

            “Hey there.” Someone said as they sat down across from him. Ryan looked up and saw Sarah looking at him smiling.

            “Oh. Hey Sarah.” He said, almost annoyed that it was not John.

            “How are ya, cutie?” She asked batting her eyes at him.

            “Umm. I’m good. And you?” He said, barely looking up from his homework. “God, why can’t she just leave me alone?” He thought, angrily.

            “Oh. I’m ok. Better now actually. That I’m talking to you.” She answered.

            “I see. Well, I have this homework to finish, so I probably won’t be good company.”

            “It’s ok hot stuff. I will see you in Jensen’s.” She said, getting off the cold bench and walking away.

            “God. She is so annoying.” He thought.

            Ten minutes later, the bell rang and Ryan gathered his books and was off to his first class. Drumming on his notebook with his pencil, Ryan wished for time to go by faster. He just wanted it to be time for Jensen’s class. Time to see John again. Finally, that time had come.

            Walking anxiously to class, Ryan’s mind was in overdrive. “What exactly do I want from John? He is my friend. Do I want more? Am I gay? Do I have a crush? No I can’t be gay. Can I?” Ryan was one of the first to arrive in class and quickly took his seat. “I wish he didn’t assign seats.” He thought, wanting to be able to sit in the back with John. Scanning the room, he noticed that John was still nowhere to be seen. He looked up at the wall and noticed that John only had a minute to get to class before he was late.

            Just then John walking in, breathing heavy signaling that he ran to get there in time. Walking quickly to his seat, John smiled at Ryan as he passed his desk. That smile made Ryan feel funny every time. As if a million butterflies were inside his stomach, frantically searching a way out. No one has ever made him feel the way John did. Ryan was glad that someone made him feel like that, but it also worried him. He was worried that it might be a one way street. Ryan didn’t want to loose John as a friend, so he figured the only way to assure he won’t he had to hide his true feelings. Hide the way John made him feel. He could not scare away John.

            Once John took his seat, the bell rang. Mr. Jensen told them that they were having another pop quiz. After the quizzes were collected, he started on his lecture. Ryan tried to concentrate, but his mind was elsewhere. Images of the dream he had last night, came into view. The more vivid the images became, the more he wanted to make it a reality. Ryan could feel as blood was traveling downward, forcing his pants to tighten. Closing his eyes, he let his imagination take over. Ryan and John were alone in Jensen’s class talking. All of a sudden, John told Ryan that he knew Ryan wanted him. Ryan tried to deny it at first, but John leaned in and put his lips to Ryan’s. Ryan parted his lips and allowed John’s tongue to enter his mouth.

            After a few minutes of making out, John broke the kiss and stepped back, slowly taking his shirt off. Leaning forward, Ryan sensually started kissing the top of John’s chest. Ryan loved the slightly salty taste as well as the soft texture of John’s skin. Running his hands through Ryan’s soft hair, John pushed him down slowly, towards his hard throbbing cock.

            “Ryan? You awake?” Came a voice above him.

            “Huh?” Ryan said opening his eyes. John was standing over him. Looking around the room, Ryan noticed he and John were the only two left in the classroom.

            “The bell rang. You just sat there.”

            “Yeah. Sorry…I was…nevermind. Let’s go.” Ryan said slowly getting up. Suddenly he realized that he still had a really hard problem in his pants. “I hope he won’t notice.” He thought looking over at John, who was eyeing Ryan.

            “Good dream?” John said smirking.

            “Huh?”

            “Nevermind.” John said. Ryan could have sworn he saw John’s eyes dart downward for a second, looking at this throbbing hard cock. “No he couldn’t be looking. Could he?”

            The two of them walked out of Jensen’s class and into the multitude of students; all quickly gathering their belongings and heading towards the freedom of the weekend.

            “So when are you going to the movies?” John asked.

            “At 8:30. My sister is meeting me there at 8.”

            “Ok cool. I will text you when I get home whether or not I can spend the night.”

            “Ok. Sounds good.”

            “Well Matt is waiting. I will see you tonight. Later man.”

            “Later.” Ryan said, walking to his own car.

************************************************************************

            Later that day, Ryan was laying on his bed thinking about the day and the dreams. “What could it all mean? Did I really like him? Does he like me? Did he glance down and see my boner and was ok with it? What if he doesn’t like me? I would loose him as a friend.”

            “Honey. Dinner is ready?” Called his mom from downstairs, bringing Ryan back to the real world.

            “I’ll be right down.” He answered, getting off his bed and walking to the door.

            Ryan walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table.

            “Hi dad.” He said, greeting his father.

            “Hey son. How was school?”

            “Good. I have a project due next week. I was wondering if my friend John could come over and spend the night after the movie so we can work on it in the morning.” Ryan asked, helping himself to some spaghetti.

            “Sure that seems ok.” Ryan’s mom answered.

            “Ok cool. Thanks.” Ryan said, trying to hide the happiness and excitement he felt.

            After dinner, Ryan went back upstairs and texted John asking if he could spend the night. To Ryan’s delight, John was. Looking at the clock, Ryan noticed he had two hours to kill before the movies. He decided to go take a shower. Walking over to his bathroom, Ryan stripped his clothes along the way. He turned on the water and looked at himself in the mirror. Sliding his hand over his chest and downward over his abs, Ryan wished that the hands belonged to John. By the time his hand reached his cock, it was already standing at full attention, a drop of precum falling off and landing on the floor. Closing his eyes, Ryan wrapped his hand around his throbbing cock, and started to slowly trace the length of his shaft with his fist.

            Going faster and faster, Ryan started to breathe heavily. In his mind he saw John standing in front of him naked with his hand wrapped around Ryan’s cock. The build up of pressure was getting stronger with each stroke; each stroke sending him closer and closer into pure lust. With a sudden force, Ryan’s cock erupted, spraying cum all over the place. Opening his eyes, Ryan saw the cum slowly dripping off his countertop and running down his mirror. After cleaning up, Ryan got into the shower and washed off the remnants of his cum.

            Wrapping a towel around his waist, Ryan walked out of the bathroom and into his room. Once at his closet, Ryan opened the door and looked inside. “What should I wear?” He thought. Never did he really care what he wore, but tonight he wanted to impress John. Hopefully he could get an idea if he was interested by dressing sexy. After a few minutes of looking through his closet, Ryan decided on a dark blue Volcolm shirt and a pair of tight jeans.  For some reason he decided that tonight he try going around with no underwear. Ryan loved the feeling of his tight pants rub against his flaccid cock; which did not stay soft for too long.

            Ryan walked back to the rest room to check himself out. One could tell he was hard, but thankfully the tight pants kept it under control and made it harder to tell. After spending twenty minutes styling his hair, Ryan rummaged through his medicine cabinet for cologne. “I hope he wants me. I need to know if he’s interested.” Ryan said to himself, as he walked downstairs and headed out the door.

            Walking to the movie theatre, Ryan felt his heart beat faster and harder. With every beat Ryan thought it was trying to escape his body. His stomach felt like a pretzel as it was turning over and over. In his mind he was going over all the scenarios this night could lead to.

            “Hey Ryan!” Said a voice behind him.

            Turning around Ryan saw John walking up to him. Ryan was in shock of what he saw in front of him. John wore a forest green button down shirt, which was just tight enough to accentuate every ripple and curve of John’s biceps and triceps. Looking downward, Ryan noticed that John’s tight pants fit nicely against his powerful thighs and legs. Ryan could feel his cock quickly growing, begging to escape the constricting material of his pants. Panic started to grow as Ryan feared that John caught on and was disgusted by this. However, as soon as John let out a smile, all of the fear and anxiety melted away.  John leaned over and gave his friend a quick hug. In that instant Ryan could have sworn he felt something hard press against his leg, but he couldn’t be sure. Ryan inhaled and the scent of John was intoxicating. The mixture of cologne and an almost salty manly smell invaded Ryan’s nostrils, causing his cock to twitch.

            “Hey John.” Ryan said, acting as he felt nothing.

            “Hey where’s your sister?” John asked, showing no sign of what happened a second ago.

            “Oh, she just got off work, so she should be here in like 10 or 15.”

            “Oh. Cool. Well you wanna wait here or walk around a bit?”

            “We can walk around, she has my cell.”

            Ryan and John started walking around the outdoor mall, stopping at the directory to look at the list of the stores.

            “Are you looking for anything particular?” John asked Ryan.

            “Yeah. I was thinking we hit up the candy store and just get some snacks there. It be cheaper than buying them at the theatre. There it is.” Ryan said pointing to the location.

            “Yeah. That’s a really good idea.” John said, as the two of them set out towards the candy store.

            Walking over to the candy store the two of them talked about a bunch of random things, from music and movies to school. Just as Ryan went to pay for his candy his phone rang. “Hello.” He answered.

            “Yeah. We will be right back.” He said into the phone.

            “Who was that?” John asked.

            “That was Michelle. She is at the theatre. Were supposed to meet her there.”

            “Ok. Cool.” John said.

            When they got to the theatre, they saw Michelle waiting in line. “Over here.” She yelled.

            “Hey Sis.” Ryan said, hugging her.

            “Hey RyGuy.” She said. “And this must be John.”

            “Yeah. Michelle this is John. John, Michelle.”

            “Hi. Nice to meet you.” John said, reaching out to take Michelle’s outstretched hand.

            “Yeah. Same here. Well let’s get our tickets.”

            John looked over at Ryan smiling.

            “What? What are you looking at?” Ryan said, noticing John’s smirk.

            “RyGuy?” He said.

            “Shut it. My sister calls me that.”

            “Haha. Cute.” John said, laughing.

            “Shut it. Just buy your damn ticket.” Ryan said, trying to sound pissed off.

            “Ok. Ok.” John said, busting out laughing.

            After buying their tickets, the three of them walked through the double doors of the theatre. Handing their tickets to girl working the front booth, the three of them walked down the long corridor towards theatre 3. Covering the walls on each side were pictures of clips of classic movies. Ryan recognized most of them, but a few he was not too sure about.

            Inside their theatre, people were quietly talking amongst themselves. Parents were talking while their children were busy scarfing down candy, or throwing popcorn at each other or innocent people walking by. Searching in the dimly lit room, the three of them found seats in middle left of the theatre. Michelle walked in first, followed by Ryan and John.  As they took their seats the lights dimmed completely and the previews started rolling.

            “You know we have candy but no drinks?” Ryan whispered.

            “Yeah. We should get some.” Michelle suggested.

            “Hey John. Michelle and I are going to get drinks, save our seats. What drink you want?” Ryan asked, turning to John.

            “Ok. Umm. Dr. Pepper.”

            “Ok. We will be right back.” Ryan said, as he and Michelle walked out the door and down the corridor.

            “He’s cute.” Michelle said, as they stepped into line.

            “Whatever?” Ryan said, rolling his eyes. “Yeah he is cute. He is better than cute. He is amazing.”

            “He is.” Michelle said before ordering her drink and popcorn. After Ryan ordered two Dr. Peppers, the two of them made their way back to the theatre. Right as they took their seats the movie started.

            “Thanks. How much do I owe you?” John whispered.

            “No. It’s fine.”

            “No really? How much?”

            “John. It’s fine.”

            “Ok. But, really if you want money I have it.”

            “Just shut it and watch the movie.”

            “Fine.” John said, defeated.

            Throughout the whole movie, Ryan’s mind wandered all over the place. “What if he thinks something of me buying him a drink? Will he think I wanted it to be a date? What if he gets mad? Or feels obligated to repay me?” Trying to get all these thoughts out of his head, Ryan focused on the movie.

            After the movie, the three of them headed back to Ryan’s house. Driving down the cold streets of his neighborhood, Ryan was once again deep in thought. Wondering what the night would bring. With every minute gone by, the anxiousness in Ryan built up. Slowly pulling up onto his driveway, Ryan took a deep breath, parked, and got out of the car.  He watched as John parked on the curb, and got out. Ryan was fixated on John. In the moonlight, John’s eyes sparkled, and there was just enough light to make out the slight bulge in his pants. “Does he have a boner or is he just really big?” Ryan thought to himself. All he knew he really wanted to find out; and that thought really scared him. Noticing that he was staring, Ryan greeted John and the two walked through the garage into John’s house. Neither one of them knowing that this was going to be a night they would never forget.

************************************************************************Author’s Notes: First, please Email me at: ryrywntsu2@yahoo.com for any comments, suggestions, etc. Also check out “Discovering Love” and “My Little Turtle” my other stories on here under the High School section.

Secondly, John once mentioned an idea that I am proud to finally see come to fruition. I have decided to start a yahoo group for all you readers out there. There you can post your stories of coming out, advice for anyone coming out. Advice on being gay, thoughts on the world and life in general. I encourage you to join, and I encourage any straight supporters to join as well. We live in a “crappy” world at times, but at least we can make a small change in it.

So please join at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/teenhelper/

Next: Chapter 3


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