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TEEN TALES FROM SA
Tiaan watched as the coffin was being slowly decended into the ground floor, this time really taking in all the people beside him which were crying their eyes out and throwing flowers on the coffin. Some of the ladies of the church choir was singing "Amazing Grace" for as long as it took for the coffin to reach the end of its destination. Once evertything was over and done, Tiaan turned around and walked over to the church hall. He was hungry as fuck, having not eaten since the previous day. He wondered what right he had to be there in the first place. It was not as if himself and Deon had been the best of buddies, really.
2002
"That one...no...I'll have that one, third from the left, please, Mister!"
Tiaan was so excited every single time that he went to the shops to buy a packet of potato chips. He was a avid collector of the Pokemon tazo's that resided in every packet and as the famous slogan went... he had gotta catch'em all! He thanked that shopkeeper and ran outside to open the packet of crisps. He only needed five more to complete his collection. He needed Croconaw, Azumarill, Ampheros, Remoraid and Togekiss still and he hoped and prayed that one of them was in this packet. It was the middle of the month, so his parents couldn't afford to give him money for more than one packet a day right now. He opened the packet and immediately saw the tazo laying at the bottom of it. Just as he was about to stick his hand into the packet and retrieve it, it was SNATCHED from his fingers.
"Well looky what we have here, boys! Its the Mellville faggot!"
"Give that back, Deon!" Tiaan yelled, angered to the core.
"Who's gonna make me? A faggot like you?" Deon said, turning to his buddies for conformation of the statement he had just made.
"I'm NOT a faggot! I aint sucking dicks! Give that back!" Tiaan yelled, with tears starting to form in his eyes about the entire unfairness of all this.
"Okay...but first..." Deon snickered, looking inside the packet and grabbing hold of the tazo that layed beneath the crisps. Tiaan's eyes widened as Deon held the tazo in the air, sarcastically taunting him. The tazo was that of Croconaw, one of those Tiaan still needed to complete his collection.
"I've seen him all over with those, Deon! He's a Pokemon freak, he is!" Jayden, one of Deon's buddies said with a mean streak on his otherwise, handsome teenage face.
"Oh right, is he then? Uhm...Jayden...you have your pocket knife with you?" Deon asked quietly, looking straight into Tiaan's eyes, enjoying the feeling he got from seeing the tears streaming over the latter's face.
"Got it right here, bud," Jayden said as he passed the knife to Deon. Deon never took his eyes off Tiaan, and with a brutal giggle, he stabbed the blade of the knife right through the Pokemon tazo.
"NO, what the hell are you doing!" Tiaan roared at Deon, charging at him, but before he could even get close to Deon, Jayden tripped him and sent the boy flying onto the ground. When Tiaan got up, his trousers were bloody where his right knee was situated.
"Why did you do that, Deon? What the hell did I do to you?" Tiaan shouted, dribble seeping from his mouth, indicating his shame and heartache he felt over losing the tazo and facing this monster of a boy.
"That's for being a gay, fudge packer, cocksucking FAGGOT!" Deon yelled in his face, so much so that the latter's spit splattered all over Tiaan's face.
"Jeez dude, I'm NOT FUCKING GAY!" Tiaan shouted, his voice hoarse with emotion. There was only so much that a thirteen year old boy could take.
"Whatever you say, faggot. Let's go boys!" Deon said, taking the packet of crisps and tossing them out all over the ground and onto the tarred road outside the shop. He looked straight into Tiaan's face whilst he was doing this.
"Faggot...such a filthy damn faggot..." he whispered before he got onto his bike and chased after his friends. Tiaan was left to stare at his broken crisps all over the place and his ruined Pokemon tazo laying a few feet away from him. He picked it up and silently walked home.
"Are you crazy to show your face here?"
Tiaan came back to the present time and found himself staring straight at Jayden. The latter was wearing a black buttoned shirt with matching black trousers. His hair was gelled neatly and spiky, like always. He placed his hand on Tiaan's shoulder.
"You know what people around here are saying, Tiaan. Why don't you just go home?"
"I had to see from myself if it was true, dude. I couldn't believe it when I heard Deon was dead."
"Tiaan...like I said...people around here have a different way of thinking. There are a lot of people here thinking you murdered him."
"WHAT? That's absurd!" Tiaan said, clear shock in his eyes.
"Well, he was found in front of your house, man. Right infront of your garden. Stabbed multiple times. Whoever did it, and I'm NOT saying it was you, but who ever did, must have really hated him. And you had reason to hate him, dude. More than enough."
"Doesn't mean I killed him, Jayden!"
"I don't believe you did, Tiaan. But like I said, loads of other's think you did. Why don't you go home, okay? I'll be there later on."
As Tiaan walked home he realised that perhads Jayden was right afterall. E had more than enough reason to have wanted Deon dead...
2005
"Kimberley...what the hell is this?" Tiaan shouted, as he simply could not believe what his eyes was telling him. But there it was, right infront of him. His girlfriend and Deon, totally naked, fucking right there in her bed. Deon's penis was still glimmering with cum and pussy juice.
"I just wanted to give her a clue about what a real man feels like," Deon said, his eyes sparkling and his smile widening at the minute.
"Oh my gosh, Kimmy...why? Why do this to me?" Tiaan refused to believe this. Kimberley had him had been going out for over a year now and SHE was the one to refused to have any kind of sexual happenings occur between them. Now THIS??
"Tiaan, look, I'm fed up about the rumours that my boyfriend is gay! I get crap about it every fucking day from Justine and the girls. My reputation is all over the school that I'm going out with a faggot. I'm sorry, I just couldn't do this anymore," Kimberley said, covering her breasts with the cushions.
"For fuck's sake, Kimberley, I am NOT GAY!! You wanna know where those rumours came from? Take a look at the guy you just fucked! There's your answer! He started with this shit all the way from the beginning of highschool and he still won't stop this! Oh God...I can't deal with this...okay you know what, if you want him, TAKE HIM!" Tiaan shouted and ran down the stairs and out of the front door. He cried himself to sleep that night.
The next day he was walking into the school and going to his locker when he saw a group of kids gathering there where his locker was supposed to be. He saw Jayden standing to one side talking to a girl and approached him. When he saw Tiaan, he quickly ran towards him.
"What the hell is going on around here?" Tiaan yelled in Jayden's face.
"Hey faggot, we were just waiting for the guest of honour to arrive! Hey peeps! Tiaan's here! Lets show him his winning prize!"
"What fucking prize?" Tiaan asked, his face getting redder by the moment.
"The prize for...DRUM ROLL!!!...for being the best FAGGOT any school has EVER seen!!" Jayden yelled out and all the boys and girls surrounding them started to laugh and sneer comments towards Tiaan. The latter's eyes started to water up when he saw his locker. It was painted bright pink, with a big enlarged picture of Deon and Kimberley kissing posted on the front. That wasn't all. Right at the top of the locker, the word "FAG" was painted in black. The paint was still dripping down, meaning it had to be done a little while ago. And the worst of all...Kimberley was standing right there with the others, mocking him and laughing at him...Why were they doing this...
"Ahoy, faggot! Hope you like my surprise!" Deon said as he arrived behind the spectators who were still laughing and chating amongst themselves.
"I'm gonna get you, Deon. So help me...I'll get you," Tiaan said quietly as he stared straight at Deon.
"You and the rest of the gay crew, I suppose? Get the hell away from me, you disgusting queer..." Deon whispered to Tiaan, before he turned around and walked away. Halfway into the school corridor he turned around.
"By the way, Tiaan...happy birthday!" he said before he laughed and walked into one of the classrooms.
The front door bell rang, once more dragging Tiaan out of his past memories and back into the present. He walked down to the door and opened it up. It was Jayden, dressed in a winter coat and rubbing his arms in order to get warm.
"I was thinking you were chickening out on me, bro."
"I told you I'd come round. I've missed you so much," Jayden said, closing the door before pushing Tiaan against the living room wall and laying his coldish lips on him. He leaned up with his left hand and caressed Tiaan's cheek, cupping his face, before he was violently pushed away by the person he was so passionately kissing.
"Dude! What the fuck?" Tiaan screamed, wiping his face and lips with his hands as fast as he could. He stared down at Jayden, who in truth, had a really hurt look on his face. Then suddenly his expression changed, as if he understood why Tiaan had pushed him away, before he smilingly said:
"Tiaan, dude, we can relax! Deon's dead, he can't hurt you anymore! For years he terrorised you and bullied you about being gay and you always denied it, but you don't have to anymore! He's dead, Tiaan...damn you were always so fucking beautiful..."
He attempted to grab Tiaan's waist and pull him in for another kiss but Tiaan grabbed his hands and held them together.
"Jayden...I dunno what the hell is going on...but I'm not...and never was gay in my life. That's why I could never understand why Deon told the entire school that I was. Jayden, I'm not gay. You understand?"
Jayden's bottom lip started to tremble and his eyes were littered with confusion as he stared back at Tiaan, casting his eyes down to the latter's hands holding his own.
"Oh my God dude...when back in Highschool, when you always said you weren't gay...my fuck, you really meant it, didn't you?"
"Ofcourse I did! Why did you think I dated Kimberley? Thanks to Deon she was the only girlfriend I ever had! Everyone thought I was gay!" Tiaan said franctially, finally realising what Jayden was on about. He was just in time to catch Jayden as the latter's body seemed to just give in underneath his weight. He slapped Jayden's face repeatedly as to not let him faint.
"Jeez Jayden, what the hell is this, what is going on with you? I'm fucking calling a doctor..."
"What have I done...what have I DONE??" Jayden screamed out loud, tossing and turning his body, holding his head in his hands.
"Jayden, just stay there, okay? I'm calling a doctor, just stay calm!" Tiaan shouted as he reached for his cellphone and scrolled down to his doctor's number, before dialling.
"What have I done...he was never gay...oh God why did I do this...what have I done..." Jayden kept mumbling over and over. Eventually he calmed down as the doctor arrived speedily and gave him an injection. Tiaan carried Jayden to his room and layed him down onto the bed. He sat next to his sleeping friend for a few minutes, thinking back to the day where the seemingly impossible happened.
2006
Tiaan didn't even wanna think what would have happened if he didn't start to take Karate lessons when he had entered Highschool. It was partly because of Deon and his gang's bullying and the school's sheer reluctance to do something about it, that Tiaan's dad decided he had enough and enrolled Tiaan in taking Karate, so that the latter would be able to defend himself. His parents worked overtime most of the days, so that there was spare cash at the end of the month to pay for the lessons. He was walking back from the shop after his mom had sent him for some milk and bread when he was once again cornered by Deon and Jayden.
"Didn't I tell you that seeing you at school was more than enough, and that I didn't EVER wanna run into you outside of it?" Deon sneered, spitting Tiaan's feet. Tiaan didn't even care. After six years of taunts and terror, he had enough. Let them do to him what they wanted. Its not gonna be like someone would care besides his parents ofcourse, if he died or ended up in hospital.
"I gotta get home Deon, so if you don't wanna see me me, just let me get past and out of your hair, okay?" Tiaan said, not looking away for a second.
"DUDE!! Finally you start acting like a fucking man! Little too late though, brother! Awww did mommy send you to buy her some milk and bread?" Deon asked before Jayden rushed over to Tiaan like lightning and pinned his arms behind his back while Deon took the shopping bag from him.
"Please Deon, we don't have money to waste, please don't..."
"SHUT UP! I don't wanna hear your faggot voice!" Deon screamed before he was stopped right in his tracks. He turned around and saw three black men ganging up on them. Tiaan looked around in fright...there wasn't a single person around to help them.
The black men said something to eachother in Xhosa before grabbing Deon and started to beat the pants of the 18 year old boy. The one of them kept his hand over Deon's mouth to prevent him form screaming. They kicked and punched Deon until he couldn't move anymore, and he simply sunked to the ground, covered in blood. One of the black guys pushed took out a knife and pointed it to Deon.
"You know whaaaat? I really HATE you white scum..." he said to Jayden and Tiaan before he lunged at Deon with the knife. Tiaan didn't know why he did it. He didn't even know what happened. All he knew was that time seemed to stand still, and when he could open his eyes and focus again, the three black guys were all laying on the ground, unconsicous. Jayden grabbed Deon and Tiaan and together they ran out of there, back to safety. Deon was still coughing and weezing due to the beating he got, while Jayden's breathing was erratic. Only Tiaan didn't even break a sweat. He was still too out of it to be honest.
"You saved our lives, man...you fucking saved us..." Jayden whispered, his chest heaving. Deon finally stood up, pain etched on his face. He took one look at Tiaan as if he wanted to say something...but he turned around and limped away.
From that day onwards, Deon left Tiaan alone, and he never even bothered to bully him or even talk to him. Jayden on the other hand, became close friends with Tiaan, the latter furiously apologising for his part in the crap that they had put Tiaan through for all these years. Jayden himself, on the final day of school, during graduation, walked up to the principal, asking if he could say a few words.
"Friends...as we are about to leave this school and all our teenage memories, I want to set one story straight right here. You guys all know Tiaan Malherbe, right? The guy we loved to hate and call names. Lemme tell you right now...this "faggot" saved our lives three months ago. Myself, Deon and Tiaan were attacked by racists in an alley, and Tiaan saved us by using Karate to knock those bastards out. If it wasn't for him...I wouldn't be standing here right now. As far as Tiaan being gay...that was a lie from beginning to end. I realise we can't turn back time to stop bullying him, but this comes from my heart. Tiaan Malberbe is NOT gay, and he never was. If someone is to blame, blame myself and Deon. But never again, should Tiaan Malherbe be called a faggot!"
That was a couple of years ago, and still Jayden's friendship meant a lot to Tiaan. He was jolted back into the present time when Jayden woke up and gently nudged him.
"You're awake..."
"Dude...why didn't you say anything? Why did you let me believe you were gay? I even stood up for you at fucking Graduation and said those things, all while I genuinely believed that you were just HIDING it really well. Gosh, when Deon died, I thought you had nothing to fear for anymore and that you would...you know...come out..."
"Oh Jay...dude, when I said I was gay, I meant it. It was Deon's lies that caused all this. It was him, who for some fucked up reason, hated me enough to make my Highschool life a living hell. I love you, dude...just not THAT way. I really hope we can remain friends."
Jayden paused...like he wanted to say something more...before he smiled and closed his eyes falling to sleep once more.
Three days after Deon's funeral...and the front doorbell rang. Tiaan had just finished showering and putting on his t-shirt when he opened it, seeing Deon's mom standing infront of him.
"Aunt Sheila...come on in."
"I'm not stopping, Tiaan. I...I came to give you this," she said, handing him over what looked like diaries.
"And...this is...?" Tiaan asked, confused.
"My dear boy...read it. Just do me a favour...and read them," Aunt Sheila said before giving Tiaan a hug and rushing out the door.
Tiaan sat down and looked at the the books...it was indeed diaries. He grabbed the earliest one, dating back to 2002. What he read...made his heart rock with disbelief.
"I need help...I can't get this boy out of my mind. He's name is Tiaan, and his in my class. I don't know what he going on, but I like him, not like in a friend kinda like...like in a way a boy likes a girl. Dad says all queers goes to hell. I can't do this. I have to stay away from him."
"I was very rude to Tiaan today. It kinda helped me doing that. I also told a couple of girls at school that he was gay. It kinda made me feel better about myself. I really like Tiaan. I really do. All I wanna do is hug him, feel his body against mine. I have to stay strong."
"I can't cry any longer. I wish I was dead. Tiaan cried today when I broke his Pokemon tazo. I can't cope with these feelings anymore. I love Tiaan, and I really, really mean I'm like "in love" with him. Dad says if one of his boys were ever gay, he'd personally throw them out of the house. I can't do this. I have to stop loving him."
"All I wanna do is ask Tiaan to the Matric dance. FUCK...why, why do I have to be gay? WHY???"
"He saved me. He fucking saved me. I'm too afraid I'll kiss his beautiful face if I go and thank him. I have to stay away. I love him so much."
But the final piece of paper, was the one that really opened Tiaan's eyes to the truth...
"I'm gonna tell him. I told Jayden last night how I feel about Tiaan, and now I'm gonna tell him. I just hope Tiaan can forgive me. I know I did all those things to him to take the pressure off myself being gay and being in love with him. Hurting him was all that helped, all that stopped me from telling him how much I wanna be with him, kiss him, oh God...imagine sleeping with him...wish me luck! I just hope I don't lose Jayden as a friend. He was so angry...but if I have to choose, I'd pick Tiaan over Jayden anyday. I love Tiaan. I'd die if if I'll never tell him how I feel."
It was written on the day of his death.
It couldn't be...
A few weeks later Tiaan visited Jayden in prison. He had been charged with murder in the first degree and sentenced to life imprisonment. After Tiaan showed the police the last letter which Deon had written they questioned decided to Jayden, and after a search warrant was leased, they found the bloodied pocket knife stashed away in his kitchen, the same one he gave to Deon to rip the Pokemon tazo apart years before. Jayden then had no other choice that to admit that he stabbed Deon right infront of Tiaan's house, just as he was about to tell the boy he always loved, just how he felt.
"I just have one question Jay. Why? Why kill him? He was your best friend!"
"Easy. Do you have any idea how it feels like to love another guy and he doesn't love you back? Even more when that guy is a gay basher? And then FINALLY, when he reveals that he was always GAY, I started hoping that something could happen between us! BUT NO! He had to love YOU! YOU! You know what the fuck I went through when you told me you were NEVER gay!! HE WASTED HIS LOVE ON YOU! Like hell...was I going to allow him telling you. Deon was MINE. You hear me? HE WAS MINE!!"
"Was it nessacary to kill him for that, Jay?"
"YES. HELL YES! Perfect scenarion aswell...he was founded in your garden, at your house, and everybody knew how he made your life hell. Would have been perfect seeing your ass behind bars, knowing that you would have PAYED for his death. I will get you someday, Tiaan Malherbe. It will be justice for Deon's death!"
Later that afternoon Tiaan sat at Deon's grave what seemed like hours, trying to find the right thing to say. As he was about to leave, finally he got the courage from somewhere to speak...
"Deon...why didn't you just tell me? I wouldn't have been mad. Because deep inside...I lied to myself ASWELL. I lied to Kimberley and I lied to Jayden, I lied to my heart. Its funny...you were right all those years you taunted me. Why do you think I never switched schools, fought back or layed complaints about you?"
Tiaan stood up, reached into his jacket pocket and placed the broken Pokemon Croconaw tazo onto the grave.
"Because I was too madly in love with you to ever do that."
Wiping his eyes, Tiaan walked away, starting a brand new chapter in his life.
THANKS FOR READING!! This series would all be one off stories such as these where teen boys deal with being gay and coming out. If you liked it and want more, please send me a quick reply on whiteryan65@gmail.com
Or you could follow me @LiciousRyan if you're on Twitter.
MUCH LOVE!!
RYAN WHITE.