"I really don't care" Dennis said adruptly which meant he did care.
Dennis and Ryan sat on the same sandbox in the park where they had played as kids long ago. Years had passed, puberty had come, graduation had occurred and now they both attended different colleges.
And during the holidays they were reunited.
"They'll yell but that's probably it" Ryan said
"And they'll stop paying my tuition, make me work in the store and if I'm lucky won't let me go to church on Christmas" Dennis chuckled but not too convincing.
"Well then why do you have to tell them? I mean you say you don't need their approval anyway" Ryan was Dennis childhood friend.
"I guess, it just seems dishonest. I mean they keep talking about me dating college girls, giving them grandchildren and stuff" Dennis said considering Ryan's comment.
"Well you can do that. I mean you can still have grandchildren, I read all the time about gays adopting or making babies with lesbian friends and so why can't you? I mean does it still work?" Ryan punched Dennis in the shoulder playfully.
"Fuck off, it works fine thank you very much" Dennis punched back. "What about the dating?"
"Just tell them you're dating and dont' say how, you ARE dating aren't you?"
"You mean am I having sex with guys?" Dennis asked.
"Yea I guess you are or else how would you know. How did you know you're gay anyway?" Ryan asked seriously.
"It's like you used to get with Sharon Mebletone, remember when she got tits? You were so horny all the time. You jacked off so many times when you slept over I swore you were going to rub it raw."
"I knew you heard me too. So is that when you knew?" Ryan asked.
"Hell I knew long before that" Dennis hesitated to tell him about the times he got erections while they wrestled or went swimming or when he saw Ryan naked in gym class or when he slept over.
"Naw long before..well I suspected it anyway." Dennis sighed.
"So what's it like, I mean the first time and uh you know" Ryan asked moving close to where Dennis was sitting on the edge of the sandbox.
"It was uh, fantastic" Dennis remembered that first time at college. He and his roommate went to a party, one of those noisy, alcohol filled frat parties. They mingled, met girls and guys.
As he was getting a beer, Dennis met Sarnotti, an Italian exchange student. "Here, let me help you with that" Sarnotti reached into the cold bucket and retreived a bottle of beer then opened it.
"Uh thanks" Dennis stammered. He could have gotten the beer and opened it himself. But there was something nice having another person, another man, do it for you, expecially one which seemed to creat a knot in Dennis stomach.
"Freshman?" Sarnotti asked.
"Uh yea, don't tell anyone or they'll kick us out, I mean the drinking and all" Dennis said.
"Well there's alot of things we shouldn't do we do when we're not at home" Sarnotti.
They talked about Italy, about Dennis home town and the people in the party as they moved through the crowd and ended on the back porch a kind of patio overlooking the frat houses' barbque area.
"So what have you been doing here that you don't do at home?" Sarnotti resumed thsi line of talk as he lay a hand on Dennis thigh as he sat on the brick wall.
"Uh I guess there's alot of things I havne't done yet" Dennis stammered. He knew Sarnotti was flirting and couldn't believe it.
Sarnotti moved to stand between Dennis' knees blocking the view of him from the party goers inside.
"Well, let's do some" he put his hand on Dennis fly and unzipped it "I see you want to"
It was true, Dennis' erection was throbbing inside his boxers. Sarnotti's fingers outlined it as he talked.
"You want to stay here or go somewhere" Sarnotti began to lower himself. Dennis stopped him.
"UH not here, uh where can we go?" He asked.
"Come" Sarnotti turned and paused waiting for Dennis "Better zip up or someone else will grab you before I have a chance to".
Dennis looked around to see if anyone was watching. Most guys were flirting with coeds or just drinking together. Nobody was watching.
"Where you guys headed?" A tall redheaded athletic looking guy asked.
"I"m going to show him the house" Sarnotti said "He'll be a pledge next year"
The guy nodded and patted Dennis on the shoulder. "Good to have you"
They climbed three sets of stairs. "This is where we go when we uh need to be by ourselves" Sarnotti said draping a tie over the knob on the door. Dennis knew enough to know that was a sign to others to not come in.
They went in and up a short flight of stairs into the attic or what was originally one.
The low ceiling made them bend over unless they stood in the middle. One round window at thge end of the attic was by a mattress on the floor. Music was playing on the radio that was perched on a table. The bed coverings were messed up.
"I see we're not the first tonight" Sarnotti said, "probably won't be the last....if we don't go all night that is" he turned and kissed Dennis.
Surprised at first Dennis stopped in his tracks..then there was no other way to describe it, he melted into Sarnottis' embrace. His arms automatically surrouned the older boy and he pressed against his body.
Deep in his mouth Sarnotti's toungue explored, rubbed Dennis tongue and seemed to suck emotions out of him.
Dennis concentrated at first on these feelings but as they moved to the mattress, thoughts faded in lieu of sensations.
He kind of remembered stripping and being stripped but it happened quickll and he mostly felt his nude body moving against Sarnotti's imediately.
Dennis didn't know what to do but somehow did it. He shivereda t Sarnotti's touch and explored the naked upperclassman himself. They kissed, rubbed their bodies together, licked, kissed and sucked each other. Dennis came quickly and blushed with embarassment.
"I'm sorry, it's uh my first" Dennis apologized figuring his inexperience was clearly visable.
"That's good actually cause the second time, it will happen more slowly" Sarnotti said as he kissed Dennis with his sperm covered tongue.
And he was right because it was hours before either of their bodies dispelled the fluid of their sexual exploration.
Dennis groaned and winced as Sarnotti showed him how Italians make love, as he put it. But Dennis did what he was told, relaxed, pushed down and let it happen.
By the time the sun had indeed poured light through that little window, he was no longer a virgin of any kind.
"So what about me?" Ryan asked.
"Huh?" Dennis attention returned to the night air and his best friend.
"I said did you ever get turned on by me? I mean I"m a guy" Ryan seemed to really want to know.
"OH that uh guess but you know kid stuff" Dennis wanted to continue to be truthful with his best friend but didn't want to loose him.
"Well why didn't we do stuff when we were kids then?" He seemed to be pressing Dennis for information.
Dennis admitted to the occasional boner.
"So why didn't we you know mess around, I mean what's wrong with me?" Ryan seemed seriously hurt.
"If you're gay you don't have sex with every guy you know, it's got to be uh something special at least for me" Dennis said.
Ryan was quiet for along time so Dennis decided to expand his truth telling.
"It's not that I didn't think about it man, but I didn't want to loose a friend just because my dick wanted to do things...hell we were kids"
"We're not kids now" Ryan said "come on"
Ryan stood up, "Comin?" he asked. It was that night in the frat house all over again when Sarnotti led him upstairs.
"But what about after?" Dennis asked "What about Clara" Clara was the girl Ryan had talked about at his university.
"We deal with later, later" Ryan said
They moved to Dennis room, the same bedroom where they had grown up, the same room where they had talked about life, religioun, girls, sports, parents and endless topics of the purpose of their lives.
It was there that both jacked off at night while thinking the other was sleeping. And it was there they went now.
"What do we do first?" Ryan asked.
"Uh lock the door." Dennis laughed and Ryan locked the door. As he turned Ryan asked "Now what".
Dennis worried that they wouldn't be friends after that night or at least not as close. He still worried that his love for his friend would reveal too much and Ryan would disappear.
It was Ryan he had decided to tell he was gay as a test before he told his parents. Just like over the years, it was Ryan with whom he shared his inner most fears and concerns.
"We uh do this" Dennis hesitantly leaned forward until his lips met Ryan's and they kissed.
"Uh that's it?" Ryan said "Hell we did that when we were six" he said.
"I guess" Dennis hesitated "but not this way" he moved close again. His body had shivered when he gave Ryan that first kiss and he liked it. This time he pressed his lips and put his arms around his friend.
They kissed harder and tighter. Dennis mouth opened and his tongue moved towards Ryan's. And to his delight Ryan opened his mouth and let him inside.
The longer they kissed the more passionate it became. Dennis peeled Ryan's shirt off and they returned to kissing as Ryan unbuttoned his shirt.
Their bate torso's pressed together. Dennis had remembered wrestling in his jockey shorts with Ryan not too long ago. His body felt Ryan's and his erect cock rubbed against his. They quit wrestling and laughed at each other's erections.
This time they didn't laugh. Out of their repsective trousers and shorts, their hands moved inside each other's underwear.
It was all there for each of them to touch.
"This is different then playing doctor" Ryan said rembering the times they shared a bath and their curosities.
"I hope so" Dennis said as he knelt taking in Ryan's penis. He had flirted with the idea of sneaking from his bed and goign to Ryan's sleeping bag many times and touching or sucking his cock.
What he didn't know was Ryan had some of the same thoughts.
They moved until both were licking and sucking each other. The precum tasted good and the cum that came afterwards they swallowed each wanting to taste the other.
"Shit man I came awfully soon" Ryan said "Sorry, it was kind of uh new"
"I thought you and Clara had been doing the nasty" Dennis said lightly stroking the smooth torso and belly of his buddy.
"Yea, but that's different" He said as Ryan moved forward to kiss Dennis on the mouth again. Their kiss became long and even more passionate then before and their sex seemed to absorb hours of their energy.
"Dennis, are you and Ryan going to come down for breakfast?" Dennis mother knocked on the door and as she had many time in the past awakened the boys.
This time however they were in the same bed, their naked bodies clinging to each other.
"So you gonna tell them?" Ryan asked. His fingers touched the face that he had seen for years but never really explored until that night.
"About us you mean?" Dennis asked.
"Shit they probably think we messed around before, naw about you being gay" Ryan said.
"Hey I'm not gay I just said that to get you into bed" Dennis said then laughed.
Ryan punched him and their naked bodies wrestled as they had many times before ending in holding each other's excitement until both erupted all over each other.
And Dennis never told his parents, he didn't need to.
Beside all he really cared about was if Ryan knew.