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Chapter 39. Alex tells of His day; Only Billy could be his Master.
I woke up from a wonderful dream. I don't remember too many details , just Billy telling me in His sweetest voice that He was proud of me and He was glad that He decided to make me His and own me forever. When I opened my eyes, I realized that I had been sleeping in the cage and that it makes me feel safe to be locked up, knowing that all I had to was hit a red button and He would hear me. I stretched out my legs and realized that the door of the cage was unlocked and opened.
"Ah, my slave boy is awake." I hear His voice from the other side of the room. "Come on out, alex, crawl over here to me. Keep your head as low to the ground as you can and get over here to your Master." It's an awkward process to get out of the cage, but I manage, and then, with my nose practically dragging on the ground I crawl over to Him and hear Him say, "That's a good slave. Head down to the ground showing Me what you know what you are, an inferior being subject to My will, a slave whose only purpose in life is to give Me pleasure and make Me happy. Come on, boy. My toes are waiting for you to come home." I get near Him and sure enough, His legs are spread out and my forehead bumps into His toes which are up in the air and wiggling. "New command for you, slave. The command is come home', or just home,' and you know it means that My feet want your attention. And when you are at My feet, you know you are home. That's what the command means. So have at it, slave. Drool and lick and suck your Master's toes and feet like the slave you are."
I lose myself in the task and realize that He is so correct. When I am sucking His toes and licking His feet, I am truly home. This is what I've been looking for ever since high school, ever since I realized that I wasn't only gay, but that my deepest need was to be a sub. A slave. But no one like Him ever understood how to get to me, how to set my inner slave trembling and pulsating and sending waves of masochistic pleasure flowing through my veins. And so here I am, at His feet, my Billy, my Master, and He is so beautiful, every single inch of Him, and there is nothing better than having parts of His body in my mouth, and especially, if not His cock, then His feet. Time stands still when I service Him this way. My mind ceases its meandering and I am totally focused on making love to every single piece of skin and bone and, oh yes, the crevices between His toes, which He especially likes me to lick and keep clean. Indeed. Master is so wise. This is home for me. Home for His slave boy.
Eventually, Master praises me and then reaches down to help me stand up, and I stand up and look into His eyes and fall in love even more deeply than ever before, and in my mind I beg Him to hold me and He hears me and puts His arms around me and cradles me as He sucks on my neck, my vampire Master.
"Okay, baby, we're going upstairs now and your Master is taking you out to dinner as a reward for being such a good boy today. He holds me by the ring which hangs down from my collar and leads me upstairs and into the bedroom. What does He have in store for me next, I wonder. Whatever it is, it will be what is best for me, I know. He goes into the drawers of His bureau and picks out my black jock and tells me to put it on. Hmmmm. Haven't worn this since we left my apartment. (is it still mine any more?). Then He takes a pair of His jeans and tells me to put them on. "You are wearing my clothing tonight, boy. I want to be able to surround your naked body and this is the best way. Besides, I want you to look good for me tonight."
He smiles at me and I have trouble concentrating on pulling up His pants over my body. There are still spots on my ass and legs which hurt from the crops the Masters at the ranch used on me, but that is good. Like Master says, a slave should always have welts somewhere. I gladly wear them for Him, just only wishing He had been the one to lay them on me, but I know that it won't be long before He does again.
"Now this will take some thinking. I would like for you to keep that collar on, so I have to figure out what I can have you wear which will hide it, or at least most of it. I know. This." He hands me a shirt that has a tall collar and He helps me put in on and sure enough, it hides most of the collar, unless someone tries to look very closely and might only think I'm wearing some kind of weird necklace. "Perfect," He says, and He kisses me on the cheek. "Now go brush your teeth. Your breath stinks of piss, slave." I go inside to do what He's told me to do and He follows me into the bathroom and says, wait a minute, boy. He pulls down His zipper and pees into the toilet and I watch, mesmerized as always by the sight of His cock, remembering how I had stared at Him that one time in the boy's bathroom in high school and how that made Him realize I was queer for Him, and He told me that one day I would be a slave to His cock. How right He was! He finishes—well, almost finishes. "Bend down, slave and finish My off like the piss –drinking faggot you're becoming." I do so. There's a lot left and I let it fill my mouth and then gulp it down while He puts His hand on my Adam's apple and feels His piss going down my throat. Not too much. Not yet, anyway. Never ever thought this would be something I'd be willing to try, but when it comes to Him I have no will of my own. "Good slave. Now go brush your teeth, and use mouthwash as well, then come meet me in the living room."
I do what He's told me to do, and it is nice to have my mouth feeling fresh. I go into the living room and see that He is sitting on the couch and holding a large bath brush in His hand. Uh-oh, I think. "Pants down and over my lap, boy. Want to warm you up before we head off to dinner."
I go to Him and open my pants and pull them down. "Just enough to expose your sweet ass, boy. Now, over my knees." I get into position and wonder just how warm He wants me to be, just how much it's going to hurt to sit in a chair at dinner. No worries. That is completely up to Him. He caresses my ass with the brush side and it kind of tickles for a bit. "don't worry, alex, I'm not going to hit you over the marks from the crops. Just a little warm up so you remember that I own you." And quickly, He slams the hard end of the brush down on my tender ass, never hitting me in the same place twice, but spreading the burn evenly across my ass. I cry out, but not too much. "Spread your cheeks, slave," He commands, and I reach back and expose my hole to Him and He lashes it three times. Yeow! does that hurt!" I yelp out, knowing He never wants me to be brave or hide any pain. "It pleases me to hear your pain, slave," He has told me repeatedly, so I do my best to please Him as I cry out. "That's enough. Stand up, boy." I stand. He pulls up my pants, tucks in my shirt and pulls up my zipper. My button is still open and He tells me to button myself, so I do.
"Okay, baby, we're off. I know you're hungry because you didn't have any lunch." Oh yes, that's right. I was so distracted by my state of misery and the humiliation of being ordered around and whipped with the crops by several guys I never met before. It's so nice to feel clean again, even though my ass is now throbbing from the little beating Master has given me. "Follow me," He says. "Always be a little bit behind me whenever we are in public unless I order differently. That is your place. On your knees before me, groveling before me, and, when in public, following me. Sit after I sit. Stand after I stand. Drink when I drink. Never on your own. Proper protocol in public is essential so you remember your place, because if you forget your place, you know what will happen for me to remind you, don't you?"
"Yes, Master."
"I'll bring this brush with me, just in case. You can hold it on your lap in the car for me. And don't forget to keep your legs spread as much as possible in those jeans."
"Yes, Master. Always open for You, Master."
"Good boy. From now until we leave the restaurant later, call me Billy. Nothing else. Try not to slip up. This restaurant is not a place to expose what you are to anyone. Understand?"
"Yes, M,.. um, Billy."
He chuckles. Say it twenty times now: Billy, Billy
I do so, but it is very difficult at the end to keep saying because I can't hold myself back from laughing. Especially since He is laughing at my efforts. Damn, it feels good to be laughing again. Once again, Master—no, Billy—knows what I need. Finally I finish. "I love you, Billy, with all my heart and soul. Thank You for taking care of me and for training me to be the kind of slave that pleases You."
"You're doing a good job, sweetheart. By the way, this place is gay-friendly, so we can be affectionate with each other and don't have to hide any of that. Just the Dom/sub stuff has to stay hidden. But you can feel the collar around your neck and the heat on your ass, so I don't think you'll forget what you are."
"I'd never ever want to forget that, Billy. I love being Yours."
"Never forget that I love you precisely because you are Mine and I own you and I can do anything I ever want to you and you will always thank me for it."
"I won't, Billy. It's always on my mind."
"Okay, alex, this is time for safe speech until dinner is over. There's a lot you must want to tell Me, right?"
"Oh, I guess so, Billy."
"I want to hear from your lips what your day was like, what you felt and thought, how you reacted, and what you're feeling about it all now. I want your mind naked for me, boy, even while you're wearing My clothes. Understand?"
"Yes, Sir.. Billy."
"So . . . ?"
"So at the beginning I was very scared, terrified even. I relaxed a bit when I was made to grovel before Master Leroy, and then when He made me stand to inspect me, I felt more naked than ever before. If I'd been alone then I would have freaked, especially when He started handling me. And I must say, my nipples are still very sore from what He did to them."
"I'm not surprised. I almost stopped him, but decided to let things be to see what was going to happen. He looked Me in the eyes when he was working your nips and I did nod my head, so He proceeded. AS usual, I was turned on by the sound of your pain, and started already getting hard and very ready to fuck the daylights out of you."
"that was awesome, Billy, having all those men watch You fuck me, knowing they knew what I was to you. Actually it made me feel a little special."
"why?"
"Because as I saw those three men fuck cory, I knew something like that would never happen to me because You promised me You will be the only Master to ever fuck me. My ass is Yours, Billy, inside and outside too, I guess."
"No, boy, the outside is subject to other Master's punishment. Consider what happened later on."
"So true, Billy. So anyway, I got really scared again when I was led away by the foreman and realized that You weren't going to be with me."
"I was struggling not to follow them outside, to be honest, boy, but I decided that it was important for Me to allow you to be given into the hands of others, knowing for sure that they would only take it as far as they knew was sane. You may not have realized this, but your Papa sends crick up to the ranch pretty often, so I know something about what they do there and how ultimately sane the all are. crick has never ever come home seriously wounded or even bleeding, although they really put him through his paces. I've seen how exhausted he would be when he would come back home. And how marked up."
"Papa really believes in subjecting him to that type of treatment then?"
"Absolutely. He calls it conditioning. He believes it is important for a slave to be abused by others---within totally safe parameters, to be sure—but really worked over, treated like a true slave, and those guys are all experts at it and really enjoy it. AND they all get to fuck crick when its' there. Oh, and by the way, stop using a male pronoun when referring to crick. That's a bad habit which will deserve punishment if you forget that you and he are not true males."
"sorry, Billy. I'll remember. So I was really frightened, especially by the way they talked to me, especially Eugene. (I was calling him `blondie' in my own mind.)" Billy laughs. "So keep doing it. It amuses me, baby. And I'm not particularly fond of him. I'm surprised that he manages to get along with the other guys because deep down inside, he's a redneck homophobe of the worst kind."
"I sure as hell learned that! He screamed at me a lot. Called me a disgusting faggot and everything else under the sun and accused me of grooving on him. In fact, He forbade me to look at His face and if He caught me doing it, He hurled even more abuse at me. I must confess, however, that I didn't have much respect for Him. I thought He was a prisoner of His own homophobia, and also suspect that He's a lot gay than He can face. After all, why would He continue to work there with all those other supposed straight men who liked getting blow jobs from male slaves and liked fucking us when they can."
"I don't know for sure, because I didn't have much to do with him, but I've also heard crick talk about him at times, and I think you might be hitting the nail on the head. I know that crick hates and fears him as well and has even begged Papa to keep him away. I do know that the other guys keep an eye on him mostly."
"Mostly, maybe, but at the end, I was left alone with Him and it was pretty tough. He made me pull that wheelbarrow on my own and it was far too heavy for me and He laughed at me when I fell and started kicking me and cursing at me, and He kept driving me on with the crops until the foreman came over and made him stop finally."
"And what was going through your mind at the time, boy?"
"That was when I suddenly had this flash of insight and realized that I was being treated like a totally real slave and it blew my mind. By then I was miserable and I was losing my sense of things when all I could focus on was the heaviness of the load I was pulling and Him screaming at me and hitting me all over the place and hurting me so much. I forgot I was Your boy, for a moment. I felt like that was my life now, that I was a total prisoner of them all and that it was the way my life would be until something happened to either rescue me or end my life."
"wow. You know something, alex, it seems like `blondie' did you a big favor. He brought you to the point where you had an experience that you may not have had otherwise."
"True, perhaps, but I was also pretty miserable cleaning out the stables. The smell, the way I started sweating, the fact that the foreman made me pick up the horseshit I spilled on the ground with my bare hands, giving blow jobs without anyone making any comments, two of them cumming on my body, one on my face and the other down my chest, it was all pretty rough."
"And yet you never safeworded."
"Didn't even think that would be allowed."
"Something we never discussed, but we will if I decide for you to go back there another time some day. You know, boy, they were really impressed with you, the way you obeyed everything, the way you were willing to enter into the whole `game' without complaining. they had nothing but good things to say about you. I was quite surprised, and a little concerned about why you had surrendered so much."
"I was doing it for You, Billy. You wanted me there. You were allowing those things to happen. You had told me it was part of my training. And more than anything else, I wanted to make You proud of me."
Billy reaches over and strokes my thigh affectionately. "Well, you did, alex, and because of that, I'm thinking that it won't be necessary for you to go there again very soon. Of course, I could always change My mind and, if I did, I would expect the same behavior from you now that I know you can do it."
"Understood, Billy. If that's what I have to do sometimes to show You how much I love You, I'll take it all, all over again, even surrender myself totally into blondies hands. Besides, to be honest, I'm getting a little turned on just by thinking back to it all. not that I'm asking to go back, please understand."
"It did you a lot of good, boy. A big change has come over you since you were there. You're more mellow, you more easily slip into your slavery. I like the way it's effected you, boy. I never saw that with crick."
"what do you mean, Billy?"
"Dad says it's conditioning, but crick thinks of it as punishment. Rotten punishment. And I really think it gets resentful about the whole thing. Dad doesn't agree with me, because crick is always totally obedient and subservient, but their relationship is completely different from ours, alex."
"How so, Billy?"
"there's no love there, on either side."
"I can't imagine what that would be like, Billy, not to love my Master the way I do."
Billy picks up my hand and kisses it.
"That's why I'm the only One Who could possibly be the Master you need, boy. That's why you've never willingly surrendered yourself to any of the other Masters you've come into contact with during your years at the club. That's why you've always felt like something was lacking. And I've seen Doms try to drive you deeply into sub space by the way they treated you in public, but it never seemed to click, and, if I'm not mistaken, I don't think you ever agreed to go home with any of them either."
"I didn't, Billy, you were right. But I did hook up with other Doms I met on line."
"And?"
"And, we had some very hot scenes, but it was never enough. And I allowed very few repeat performances, There's only one Dom I was with for maybe 5 or 6 times, but the deeper He got into it with me, the more I started pulling back. I even began thinking that maybe I wasn't meant to be a true slave, but maybe just a sub scene-player."
"Well, then, I'm glad I decided to move in on you when I did. Actually it was something that I saw one night in the club that made Me realize I had to claim you before I would lose you forever. But enough now. We're just about at the restaurant. We'll continue this inside."
"Okay, Billy. Or, I mean, "yes, Sir."
Billy slaps me on the thigh and parks the car, and that's the end of our discussion for now.
END OF CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE Next: alex even sucks cock in a fancy Italian restaurant
This author (robbie) is a sub and enjoys corresponding with brother subs about turn-ons in the story and in our regular lives as subs .
It is also HONORED by the emails it receives from Doms and Masters. It knows its place and responds with appropriate etiquette, humility and gratitude that You are kind enough to write to it and work with it and sometimes offer advice and discipline.
subkodak25@gmail.com