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The Closet By Lord Dracul
"Grammy what's that room used for?" asked Tommy pointing to the room where his grandmother had just retrieved a vacuum cleaner to clean up the potato chips on the living room carpet.
"Tommy that room is used to hide things that we don't other people to see or know about." Said his grandmother as she pushed the vacuum.
"What's it called Grammy?" persisted Tommy. "It's the closet," said his grandmother making her way into the living room.
"Funny things about closets Tommy things have a way of coming out of there on their own." And she continued to vacuum the room, Tommy helped moved the chip bag in the way.
Ironic that Tommy Matthews should remember that conversation from his childhood. He was five and just had spilled some potato chips on his grandmother's living room carpet. He had been watching Saturday morning cartoons. At that time he seemed to recall that he questioned every thing and any thing. When his parents or his grandmother got tired of explaining things to him they simply gave him some old peace of religious rhetoric, "God made it that way." The old tried and true way of ending an argument or discussions that no one wanted to continue to pursue.
Tommy had always wanted to know the answers to every thing. His father had often told him, "Knowledge is power son, don't forget that."
"How do I get that knowledge pop?" asked Tommy.
"By asking questions son, but, mind you, not just any question. It must fit the subject to which you are seeking the answers too." Explained his father.
However when he asked those questions on the subjects that he sought the answers too people would simply say, "God made it that way" or his all time favorite, "Boy, you're getting to big for your breeches." Now, isn't that every young man's dream though, to get too big for his breeches? However, Tommy never did tell any one that though. For even though some people proved to be utter idiots on certain things being his elder, he gave them their respect and simply bowed out of the conversation. However somewhere down the road he would get the answer that he needed.
While in highschool he had asked his biology teacher why the sky was blue. The old man immediately wrinkled up his face to the point that Tommy thought he looked like a prune wearing a pair of gold spectacles. Then the old stand by flew from his mouth; "God intended it to be that way." Tommy had expected something along the lines of light reflecting or refracting off of the different gases that make up the composition of the Earth's atmosphere, which causes the sky in turn to be blue.
Now being eighteen he found himself starring at other boys his age and various men that he would encounter at the mall. Often he found his fascination with them causing some embarrassing moments. But at sixteen he had always known that he was gay. Like the vacuum cleaner he had kept this secret buried deep within his closet. But now he wanted answers and for two years he had gathered the information that he had needed and stored it away in his mind. He had never planned to let any one know that he was gay and because for eighteen years he had been told both by his parents and clergy that homosexuality was a sin and a perversion of God's natural order of things.
Jonathan Hawkins had come out of the closet to his friends at school because he had a crush on Nathan Sparks the captain of the swim team and the kids immediately began to ridicule him. Once the student body found out from Nathan that it had been a mutual crushes it turned out to be pure hell for the two boys. Nathan was "asked" to step down from the swim team and Jonathan simply became the brunt of every stereotypical homosexual joke that floated around the school. However, no one would say any thing directly to them but they heard it when passing down the hall to change classes, in the cafeteria when they sat down to eat or when one would go to the restroom it usually cleared out rather quickly.
Tommy being himself was the only one that would speak with the boys treating them as if nothing had changed. While silently longing to have his secret out in the open. The only thing that he had going for him was that his father was the mayor of the town and he was the editor of the school newspaper. Sure he would get certain stares from certain judgmental people but it didn't matter they had always been friends.
"Why you doing this man?" asked Nathan while taking a drink from his milk.
"Why am I doing what Nate, I'm hungry, I'm having lunch." Retorted Tommy.
"You know exactly what I mean Tommy, sitting here with us?"
"For one thing I have eaten my lunch with you and Jonathan every day since gradeschool and frankly I don't give a damn about what they think." Tommy proceeds to take a bite out of an apple.
"You know this isn't helping you any Tommy, to be sitting here with Nathan and me, you know they talk about you the way they do Nate and me."
"Who cares Jonathan, you guys are my best friends and nothing is going to change that now, let me eat guys but if you don't want me to sit with you anymore than I'll go eat under that old pine tree outside the cafeteria with the squirrels."
"Naw, man, just wanted to make sure you were kewl with this. Didn't we Nate, besides you'd bore the squirrel to death man." Laughed Jonathan.
"Yeah Jon."
"Besides guys I always wondered when you two would get together. So tell me have you told your folks?" Asked Tommy as he bit a bite from his hamburger.
"Yeah that was the hardest part. My parents are kewl with it but Jon's parents was a different story." Nate placed his hand on Jon's knee and then turned back to his tray to finish his lunch.
"Well what happened Jonathan?" Asked Tommy as he finished his hamburger.
"They kicked me out. Dad went berserk and began throwing my stuff out of my room into the yard and said if I didn't get the hell out of his face he would kill me. Mom just stood with her hands over her face crying. So I left, Nate's parents let me move in with him. Never heard so much cussing come out of dad's mouth and in the same breath yell Bible verses at me." Jon looked down at his food and simply pushed it around with his fingers.
"Go ahead Jon tell him the verses, you know Tom, he's going to ask you after all that's why he's the editor of the school newspaper." Prodded Nathan as he drank the last of his milk.
"Yeah Jon what were the verses he spit out at you?"
"Romans 1:18-27. Of course the kicker verses are verses 26 and 27."
"What do those verses say Jonathan?" asked Tommy.
"Man, can't we talk about something else?" Begged Jonathan.
"Tell him Jon." Goaded Nathan.
"Actually I don't remember them Tom." Said Jonathan as he speared his hamburger with his French Fries.
"Now, come on, Jonathan you don't really think I'm going to believe that, you know that book like Nathan knows about his swim stats for the last three years."
"Go ahead Jon tell him." Persisted Nathan as he finished the last of his fries.
"Oh, alright. I'll tell him. Romans 1:26: 'for this cause God gave them up unto
Vile affections. For even their women did change the natural use into that which is agains nature: And like wise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which unseemly, and recieveing in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet. '"
"So what your father is saying based on God's word is that you two have a reprobate mind." Querried Tommy.
"Yeah that's it isnt it Jon, that's what your dad said would send your soul to hell, a reprobate mind. A mind of Godlessness. " stated Nathan.
"Exactly." Said Jonathan.
"So that's why your bummed out Jon. Because you're a reprobate." Said Tommy jokeingly.
"We all ready knew that didn't we Nathan." Goaded Tommy.
Nathan grabbed Jonathan and hugged him as Tom flicked a fry at them.
"My grandmother told me when I was a little boy that people put things away in a closet to hide them from other people but sometimes they just get tired and decide to come out like you two did."
Nathan and Jonathan looked at one another in disbeleif. They figured that Tommy would accept them but they didn't think that he truly understood. So he would continue to be their friend. Smiling at one another they hugged one another regradless of the other students thought. However, when the faculty entered the cafteria they separated a little. But no one was prepared for what Tom was going to do next. Tommy got up with a look of determination on his face as he took his tray up. Then he slowly turned and said, "Listen every one, I have something to say."
"Make it quick Matthews before my food gets cold!" roared Mr. Trent the principal.
"I'm gay and I don't believe im gonna burn in hell for it like Jonathan's father tried to convience him. No, I haven't been seeing any one at school, he's too far away for you all to get too and I love him deeply. If anything Jesus has forgiven me because he said in Luke 7:50: 'You are forgiven because you believed, you are saved from your sins'".
Every one couldn't believe their ears. They just looked at Tommy in disbelief. Nathan and Jonathan, even though shocked, looked at one another and then in unison,"Way to go Tom!"
"You see Jon your not the only one who reads the Bible. Coach make Nathan the captain of the swim team again, he worked his self to death for it besides every since you kicked him off we've lost every meet. As for Jonathan just leave him be, he has stood beside many of you when no one else would. Isn't that righ Carey Campbell, he sat with you in the hospital long after your parents went home. If any of you are thinking of threatening me with my father, he already knows, we don't hide things from one another."
With that said Tommy went back and sat down with his friends. "We'd never guessed that you were gay." Said Nathan.
"Nor would we have thought you would have come out in this way." Pointed out Jonathan.
"It's better this way guys, now every one knows and they don't have to gossip about it to each other as much. Besides that closet was just getting a little to tight for me."
It's been awhile since that day when Tommy came out of the closet. Every one did eventually forget about it and Nathan led the swim team to a state championship. As for Nathan's and Jonathan's relationship they are still together and still madly in love. As for Tommy he is in a monogamous relationship with his lover and still firmly stands on the promise of Luke 7:50.
The End Lord Dracul "True Power Comes From Within."