Disclaimer: this story is intended for adults above 18 and it is the property of the author.
The Deep End, part eight by leslie
The crinkly sound of Christmas paper being sat on and squished as you turn on the floor and stare wide eyed at the next unknown treasure just under the thin easily ripable red and blue paper with those stickers you only look at long enough to remember whom you have to thank but not over caring too much ... after all ... I hadn't gotten the slippers yet, as I knew I would (happens every year, just hope this year they don't look like bunnies again ... sigh). And then it happens ... you find yourself clapping your hands ... bumping your butt on the floor as you jump up and down while sitting ... and losing breath ... as the most wonderful thing you have ever known is starting to now just show itself as the paper falls to your bunny slippered feet .................. The Barbie Dream House ..................... And suddenly it wasn't crinkly ol paper anymore, it was angel laughter and name stickers weren't just someone you knew ... it was a friend who loved you ................ As my first Christmas with my Aunty and Uncle since my parents had been snowed in on the other side of the country, taking care of Grandma's house and stuff after she had passed away, drew on through the day and into the night, I began to believe that God wasn't going to leave me alone, no matter what happened ........... no matter what ...........
Bitch huh?! ..... "Huh? .... what?! ..... oh ....OOOOH ..... I'm really sorry ...... I .... I wasn't myself ...... thats not me ....... I'm really very very sorry I said that." It's cool, I've been called worse, and with a lot more feeling in it too .......... but your still getting a ticket, she says as I can almost hear her smiling ................... And the only thing I could do .......... was laugh ............ and I did ............... I laughed so loud that I scared myself ................. I laughed, it seemed for the first time in my life and I didn't know how to stop ................. and if you listened closely as we sped past the waves crashing into the cliffs, you could hear the sound of the laughter of answered prayers and all the Christmas wishes ever wished by all the lil girls ever made ........ ever ....... as the red and blue blazing lights of the sled fly to my gift from God ...........
As the lights of the city glowing above the skyline begin to appear and the chatter on the radio increases, I know that soon, I will be with her ........... and realizing it, I begin to realize other things too ............ I begin to realize that I if it hadn't been for some freak coincidence of life, I would have never been pulled over in an abandon part of a highway .......... and would have never slowed down at all .................. and ............. and ............. well, lets just say ................. life will find a way .................. weather you think you deserve it ..... or you don't ................... "Say what's your name anyway?!" I ask the officer as the hospital entrance signs appear along the street .......... It's Sarah .... Sarah Brown ....... Why? ............. and as we pull into the emergency entrance and Sarah drives up to the double doors, I just smile and turning to open the door, I tell her ............. "Because I think everyone should know the names of their family." ............ Huh?! What on earth are you talking about .... are you ok Lauren?! ......... and as the the door closes and I stand, walking to her side of the car, I bend down to the open window and without another word, reach in and hug her ............... surprised as hell, she just looks at me as I start to run into the hospital and yell back at her .......................................... "WELCOME TO MY FAMILY SARAH"!!!!!!!!
As you run head on into heaven, with eyes wide open, tears of ultimate JOY streaming uncaringly down your face and no sounds but the sound of the most loved voice in your life filling your head .......... you don't hear or see anything else in this world really .............. it comes out as a blur ............ a sort of haze ............. sounds around you seem muffled and foreign .................. ...................... I didn't see Bill, from the store and his wife in the emergency waiting area .............. I didn't feel it at all, as they went to me and helped me through the magnetic doors and up to the elevators ................ I didn't understand much of anything said to me ............... I could make out ........ "worried"...... and I think ............ "miracle" ...... but not much else ............. as the doors opened unto the fifth floor and I was hit by the sudden shock of seeing everyone in my life that meant anything, and some that I had not thought about in years ................. over twenty friendly faces were there to surround and hold me as the doors slid open and ...................... WELL, .............................. let's just call it what it was .................................. I lost it ........................... completely ...................... if it hadn't been for Bill and Marci holding me, I would have been on my knees to the floor, as the sheer weight of the love surrounding me completely overwhelmed me ....................... My feeble attempt to describe how I felt at that moment in life will seem ............ well ............... like feeble ........... But it is something that has to be said ........................ Always being firmly convinced you have never been loved in decades, I mean really honestly LOVED ............... by anyone ............... or anything ..................... and suddenly being confronted with the complete stupidity of that belief .......... as arms hug you and smiles that really mean it are all smiling for you ..................... and the shell around you crumbles to black dust .................... as you look into the eyes of ................... "YOUR FAMILY" ...................... and open those long forgotten locked gates you had built but never really wanted to build .................... and let the sun in again ............. and let it fill your new world ...........
Please Ms. Teal, only for a few minutes please ... Shauna needs a lot of rest now and she's had quiet enough excitement for a young lady in her condition for one day ..... and Dr.Warner leads me to Shaunee's room ... just before entering, He softly puts his hand on my shoulder and says ............. "Those prayers you mentioned ......... I don't know .......... what I DO know, is that nothing we did ... brought her back ............. now remember, only a few minutes." Slowly Dr. Warner opens the door and I hear the faint beeping of the IV lines and the rustle of a nurse checking machines around the bed ... walking as quiet as I can, I pass the pale blue curtain pulled around Shaunee's bed and even more quietly, the nurse looks up at me and smiling she whispers ... "bout time, someone is waiting for you." And after a caring squeeze on my arm, the nurse whispers again ..... "please, only a few minutes" and quietly slips out the door.............
Slowly walking to Shaunee's bedside, I can't see the bandages, the clear plastic tubes going into her arms, the multitude of lil flashing lights and displays ........ no ............ all I choose to see ............. is an angel ........... in every meaning of the word .......... and as I stand by her bedside, I can't help but kneel down and softly place her warm fragile hand in mine and lie my head gently on her lap .................... then ............ out of the soul of my heart ............ I hear her ........... soft ............. so ....... soft ................ " n ...... no ......... leave ................. no leave ..............." Looking up at my beautiful princess ............. all I could do was ............. smile .................. "No baby ............. no leave ........... never ............ never ................. never ever again." And before my best friend in the world drifts back to her gentle sleep, I see a faint smile ................ the kind of smile you only think you have caught a glimpse of ............ from the one you love .................. just before the soft cushion of the pillow wraps around there cheeks as they tell you they love you before saying goodnight ..................... And I think to myself ........... no ......... no leave.
A few minutes later, Dr. Warner is at my side and softly tapping on my shoulder ....... It's time Ms. Teal, Shauna has to get some rest now ............ Looking up at the doctor, then back to my baby, I sigh and slowly stand ....................... "Sorry Doc, I'm not going anywhere" ............ but Ms. Teal, the nursing staff are very professional and caring people here and Shauna must not have any undo stress at this point and we'll let you know the second something develops, I promise ......................... Smiling and turning to the doctor .............. I place my hand over his as he is whispering .......... "Thank you Dr. Warner, for all you have done for Shaunee but now it's time for another kind of medicine .................. And I'm ....... not ....... going .......... anywhere, ever again." And as I slid back to my knee's and take Shaunee's hand in mine, I can hear the doctor just sigh ..... and a moment later, slide a chair to me and says "This might be more comfortable Lauren" and as he is leaving our room, I can hear him tell the nurse coming in ......... "She stays and God bless em both"...............................
The days went by one day at a time since then .......... Ella and Bill never left her side except when we almost had to be dragged out by the rest of our "Family" to get something to eat or take a shower ............. there was always someone with my girl .......... we all made sure of that ............... and we became the kind of family you really never really believed existed outside of a book or movie ........... it was .................. it was ................... Beautiful ..................................... Shaunee could talk some now and still the only explanation the doctors could give us was .............. a list of possible reasons why the recovery was progressing way beyond expectations ............... but in the end .............. they really had no rational explanation for it ............. and as Dr. Stien put it one day in the cafeteria over coffee ............... "Some things happen here that I couldn't explain in a lifetime, some very good, some very sad, you do everything you can do ........ but when all is done and what's left is the waiting ........ well ......... I think we all need something to hold on to ........ a strong family ....... or strong beliefs ......... or a strong love ........ and none more so than the person lying in that recovery bed ...... all we can do for us, is to let them know there not alone in this."
A few days later, I got another shock ............... as I was lifting Shaunee's head to adjust her pillows some, a voice from the past drifted through the room and into the long forgotten places of myself, set aside from days gone by and never remembered ............. "Lauren?" ............. "Lauren ......... it's us ....... were here now" ............. And as I look up, I see them come closer to the bed ........ and all I could do was say ...... "H ..... how ..... How did you know?" Bill and Ella gave us a call a couple of days ago ......... and as I stared utterly amazed at what was happening .... they walked to my baby's bedside and taking her hand in theirs, Shaunee smiled up at them ..... then over at me ......... and with the pure look of love and happiness ..... she says ........ "I have always wanted to meet your family ...... and now I am." Smiling, Uncle John told me they got a call from Bill and Ella, telling them what had happened and that we needed to get here IMMEADIATLY ......... at least thats the message they got from ...... I'm guessing this is Shauna?" ........ Still stunned, I can see my girl smiling up at both of them ....... "Yes, Shauna I believe was the one doing the dictating we heard in the background" ................. "Oh Lauren honey" ............ and Aunty Mary was rushing over to me and hugging me tight ................ "Why didn't you call us honey?! ............ Do you know how long we have been waiting to hear from you sweetheart?! .................... If it wasn't for this lil angel you have here, we might not have known about any of this and honey, ( holding my head between her hands now and looking me in the eye) ......... were family, no matter what sweetheart ..... were here for you now and we will always be here for you .......... please honey ...... forgive me for not saying it before or enough ....... but I was wrong blaming you for the accident ......... it was sooo long ago and you were the one I took it out on for so many years ............. it should have been us but we were too busy and your mother and dad had to go out in that storm to get you that night .......... you were our responsibility ........ we said we would pick you up ........... but work came first ..... work always came first ............ and your mother and daddy paid the price for my selfishness .............. Honey, I know you could never forgive me .......... but I'm here and I'm not giving up ...... neither one of us will ever give up in this honey ....... your all we have sweetheart .......... please ........... please baby .......... forgive me ......"
Between the hugging, the kissing and the tears ....... I just looked over at Shaunee and smiled .......... what can you do .......... Angels bring love ......... it's what they do ............ you can run from it ........... you can refuse to see it ............ you can even try to kill it ................ but in the end .......................... Life will find a way ................
The weeks rolled by ......... both families stayed in the house together and we never left Shaunee alone ...... one of us was always there ........... John, Rebecca and Bill pretty much took over the store and kept things going, showing up at the house or the hospital all the time .......... and in time My princess was ok to come home and the homecoming was ................. pure
............... magic .............. All our friends and families were there, up to and including Officer Sarah Brown, her husband Rick, Dr. Warner and many of the hospital nurses and store patrons from years ago to the present ................ As I wheeled my baby from the van ..... down the sidewalk ....... and into the walkway ........ we were surrounded by all our friends ........... as if in slow motion ........ I looked at the warm smiles ........ the laughter ........... the heartfelt wishes ........... and the deep never ending looks of happiness from my girl, as she took it all in .......... both Uncles now came out and one on each side of the wheelchair, told me to stand aside while they lifted the princess from her chair to the sofa we had made up for her on the front porch, then setting her down, both slightly bowed to her and kissed her hands ..... the turning to me, hugged me as hard as anyone could ever be hugged ........ and bringing out the trays and trays of food and drinks out from the house to the tables already set up in the lawn ....... both Aunties smiling and giggling ........ set out a bonanza of assortments .............. as Big Guy is still busy licking Shaunee's face and refusing to leave her lap for even an instant ........... I can hear glasses being tapped and look up to see 75 glasses raised ........ and with a clear and happy voice .......... Shaunee says to all ....... "Welcome to our family!!!"
End of part eight Thank You all for the lovely mail, please never stop writing to me at leslie_hi@kaxy.com ... I love to hear from you all Part nine to follow soon kisses
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