The Dollhouse

The Dollhouse Chapter 1

Dollhouse, Chapter 1

Chapter 1: A Real Boy

Growing up I remember Pinocchio saying how much he wanted to be a real boy.  It was because he was fake. He was a puppet. He was a doll.

Hey What's reality?  What was real?  What was fake?  What was flesh?  What was plastic?  What was reality? I wonder those things.  I couldn't believe this was my reality.  I couldn't believe my reality was Lionsdale High.

I roll over to Bates.

"First day of school," he states.

"I can see you're excited," I notice.

His dick is hard.  I don't hesitate to grab it and put it in my mouth.  The warm saltiness on the tip of his dick makes my own dick swell up like an allergic reaction.  I put his cock into the back of my throat.  I gargle like I have Listerine in there.  Fuck it tastes so good.   Before long I find myself bobbing my head up and down on his wet cock.  My finger gets down to his asshole as I begin to probe his prostate.  He loves it when I do that.  He tosses his head back.  He does it as hard as he can.

"Oh hell yeah," Bates is telling me.

I push harder. His asshole is so tight that I can barely fit a finger in it.  It's so warm and smooth.  I start fondling his balls with my tongue.  I can see a long strip of precum start dripping off the tip.  He is loving it and so am I.

That's when I hear the footsteps.

Fuck.  My dad was up.

"Time for school!"  the door opens.

My dad looks around the room suspiciously.   Bates is under my bed before my door opens and my dad is standing there looking at me wondering why I wasn't ready.

"Gimme a second."

"You're going to be late."

"Just a second more..."

My dad nods, "Fine."

~

I'm not excited about this.

"Please no..." I state.

I hated first days.  First days were always the fuckin' worst.  The car is making so much noise. Pops is pulling up jamming gangster rap from the 90s in his hooptie thinking he's the coolest motherfucker walking.  The car is probably older than the song that's playing on the radio.   Pops means well.  Ever since mom was gone, it's only been me and him.

"Not this shit again," he starts looking over at me.

"You don't get it.  You don't get how bad it is."

"Listen Yogi.  What I tell you about defending yourself.  If one of these kids start with you just pop `em in the mouth.  That's all."

He's not joking when he says, Yogi.  That's my name.  Yogi Luthor.  It was my dad's idea.  He said I looked like a little teddy bear when I was a baby.  So he named me Yogi.  My dad was on drugs at the time. I don't know which.   Something hard. Clearly, that's probably what it takes to name your son Yogi.  And my mom loved him so much she just let it ride.

Kids grew up though.

The cute shit died down and I'm left just looking fuckin' stupid.

"Dad.  You don't get this school.  You don't get it."

If only he could spend a day here.  He would understand.

"This school is the best of the best.  Your Aunt pulled some strings to get you into this school.   This school will give you a future.  You know it."

"I can have a future wherever I go."

"You think I want to drive two hours here and back?  I did this because this is what your mother wanted.  If your mother was here, you know she'd tell you how important it was to  get the best education."

"She's not here though is she!" I scream.

I am so angry.  I know I'm freaking out.

My father's voice gets real stern.  Whenever he gets serious, he gets stern as hell, "You're going.  Point. Blank.  Period."

Pops is gangster.  He always has been and the thing about this school is...it was far from that.  When we pull up to the parking lot I can already see the preppy uptight students of Liondale High looking over at me.  Most of them have cars.  I'm one of the few being driven by my parents and I know I'm the only one who is driving in a car that probably shouldn't be on the road.

It was one of the top high schools in the country in one of the best areas.   Kids are pulling up in Aston Martins.  Bugattis.  Bentley trucks.

I'm pulling up in a beat up lemon.

"Have a nice day," Pops says.

I don't say it back.  I'm so angry.  I'm beyond mad as I get out of the car.   He drives hours to get here.  We don't live anywhere near Lionsdale.  We couldn't afford any property anywhere near here.  I could have went to public school.  I could have gone to a school that I fit in but no.  Pops literally forced me to into this.  Since I was a kid I'd been enrolled in Lionsdale private schools...with these people.

I get out of the car.

The air even smells different in Lionsdale.  The school sits high on a hill.  It's like Mount-fucking-Olympus with the Gods looking down on the peasants and poor suckers like me.  From here I can see the large state of the art campus.  It had the best of everything from multi-touch LCD screens instead of whiteboards to LCD touchboards which were like giant tablets with LCD screens lying flat atop a table-like structure. Students sit around the table tablet, swipe on the board to manipulate and drag images around the screen, or type notes with their onscreen keyboards.

The school was the shit.  That wasn't the problem.

"Yo----what the fuck is that?" a voice states pointing at my car and laughing.

"When life gives you lemons," is the reply.

There is laughter at that moment.  I notice the kids almost immediately as I walk out of the car.  Everyone noticed them.

The Dollhouse.

That's what we called them.

There are 5 of them and they run the school.  The leader of the pack is Adonis Fallon. He is the sexiest by far.   In Greek Mythology, Adonis was a man of great beauty and desire.  The kind of man that the Gods came out of heavens and got jealous of.  I would say this Adonis might as well be him.

Adonis hops out of an Audi with his friends.  He's not the one who makes the comment about my dad's car.  He doesn't even laugh.  He's too busy on his phone to even notice a diss to a mere mortal like me.

Adonis stands 6'3".  He's all muscle and brawn.  He's the quarterback of the football team.  His dad is a rich investment banker and his mom is a model.   He has olive skin, curly short hair, a body most people would never achieve and eyes the color of pearls.   When he walks most people turn and stare because everyone is addicted to him.  He is that stereotypical, cliché high school heartthrob that everyone just wants to be near.

Except he wasn't a normal high school heartthrob. He was a Lionsdale heartthrob. Take your sexiest guy and multiply him by ten. That was Adonis.

"What did that motherfucker just say?" my dad asks from the car.

"Dad go..."

"No wait!"

"DAD!"

I slam the door on my dad and walk away as fast as I can.  I walk right past Adonis and the Dollhouse.  I hurry.  That's right.  Most people cleared the way when they walked through, including me.  A part of it was that you didn't deserve to stand next to them.

Adonis, Micah, Braden, Serena, and Ivy.

Back in the day, the Olympians stayed on Mount Olympus and they ruled the world from their mountain.  With the Dollhouse, it was clear that not much had changed.

~

I'm in the locker room staring across at the boys of the Dollhouse.  Adonis was the Ken Doll.  He was the perfect doll.  His best friend Micah was the Smooth Doll.  Micah O'Neil was the type to talk a girl straight out of her panties.  And then there was Braden.  He was the Clown Doll.  Or the Funny doll. Someone once told Braden he was funny and he took that shit to heart and spent his days trying hard to make everyone around him laugh.  He wasn't funny...not in the least, but people worshipped the ground he walked on so even now I see a group of wannabe dolls standing around him laughing at everything he says.

"Wish my body looked like that," Mitchell states.

David Mitchell is sitting next to me on the bench.  I wasn't even paying attention when he says it.  I don't even want to pay attention.  But most of the boys in the locker room have gathered around Braden, the Clown Doll.  He's telling them some story and they are all kissing his ass making it seem like it's the most interesting thing in the world.   David is talking about the bodies of the three boys though.  Each of the boys seems to have an 8 pack or something.  I'm talking perfect bodies.  The kind of bodies you see on Instagram and you wonder if the person sleeps in the gym.

"Be happy with what you got David, not everyone needs to be like that," I state.

I think I'm just trying to uplift him.  It's the first day of school.  Me and David go way back.  He smiles and says, "Thanks, Yogi."

"Bullshit," another voice adds in.

I turn and see Bates Lawrence, the same guy from this morning. Bates is a nice looking guy.  He is white with jet black hair,  a sexy demeanor and a sense of humor but he still kind of fades to the background.  He probably would have been the shit in any other school except that in this school beauty was defined by the Dollhouse and he didn't even hold a candle to them.

"Yo Bates.  I haven't seen you all summer!  You still owe me my 25 bucks."

I'm lying. I see him every other day. I head over to my friend and we hug.  Bates was cool.  We'd been friends forever.  Maybe it's because he's the only other guy in the entire school whose parents weren't rich.  He didn't get in the same way that I did.  He didn't get in through his Aunt.  Bates got in through a scholarship.  His neighborhood literally put their money together to send him here.  It was in the New York Times or something about a poor kid being sent to Lionsdale High.  It was a big story.

"I don't got it.  Ask one of those rich kids," he laughs, "Besides when we going to hang out again?  The last time we hung out was...cool."

I remembered the first time Bates and I hung out.  I remember he was the only one who I was comfortable enough to see where I lived because I knew he didn't have money like that.  I remember drinking.  I remember getting drunk.  Then I remember Bates biting his lip and saying that he always wondered what it would be like to get head from a guy.

I remembered telling Bates I always wondered what it would be like to give head to a guy.

I remember us both fulfilling our curiosities that night.

"Yeah cool," I state, "You can come over after school, if you don't mind the drive."

"I wanna come," Richard adds in.

Richard is the one kid in school who always wants to be a part of something.  I laugh when he suggests it.  If he knew what Bates and I were up to, he definitely wouldn't have wanted to be involved in the least bit.

"Nah, we real exclusive who we hang out with," Bates laughs.

Richard looks disappointed, even though Bates is laughing.  He probably thinks we rented out a yacht or something.  Richard has money like that, but he's always been an outsider trying to fit in.  It's kind of sad really to see his face.

David just keeps staring over at the Dollhouse guys, "Bates, we all know who the REAL exclusive group is around here."

Bates turns over to them, "True.  Hell, they are more than welcome...huh, Yogi?"

Bates looks over at me.  Bates and I know what he's talking about.  Bates licks his lips.  I know what he's thinking.  He is sexually attracted to Adonis, Micah and Braden.  Bates has had many girlfriends in his past but I know he definitely was curious...at least.  And I knew if he had half the chance he'd turn full gay for a shot at any one of the three boys.

"Nah.  I'm good," I respond.

Bates looks at me like I'm losing my mind.

"Yogi, you telling me if you had all the money in the world you wouldn't want to look like that?" Bates asks me.

I look over at the three.  Specifically, I'm staring at Adonis.  He's changing into his gym tights.  His ass is a round tight little bubble. His abs are like a rippling wave, choppy and defined.  His biceps are like huge bazookas.  His face is some gay boys fantasy.  There isn't a cut, bruise, discoloration, pimple, wart, blemish or any type of flaw.  His facial hair is perfectly trimmed.  He's...perfect.

And he knows it.

"No comment."

Bates laughs, "Man just say it."

"No.  I wouldn't.  Who wants to be perfect?  I'll take my regular body any day.  Who wants to be plastic?  Hell, I hear guys are getting plastic surgery on their bodies just like girls nowadays."

I shrug.  I say it to make myself feel better.  I'm just annoyed at the ass kissing at this point.

"Shit...send me to their surgeon," Bryan Waters states.

The guys laugh at that moment.  It was almost as though they weren't even hearing what I said.  I didn't matter and my opinion didn't either.  Everyone in the school was almost whipped.  These were boys who literally were saying they would give anything in the world to look like another guy.

Guys like Bates had attractive faces.  There were guys on the football team that had nice bodies.  Hell, I was kind of cute myself.  I had brown skin, big eyes, white teeth and I got a ton of compliments on my dimples.   But then there were guys like Adonis, Micah, and Braden.  They were the kind of motherfuckers you look at and just think... "Damn, it's not fair."

We head out on the floor.  Coach Tray was the gym teacher.  He was a chunky guy who was sure to tell us all what to do daily but didn't lift a damn finger himself.   Of course he kissed the ass of Adonis and his group.

"Anyone have any suggestions for first day?"  he asks the group but then almost immediately turns to Adonis, "Adonis?"

I'm not surprised.   Adonis and the Dollhouse skated by. Tonya Harding style. They literally went through school unchecked.  Even Braden.  And that didn't make any sense because I knew damn well I was more studious than Braden was.  Hell,  I probably studied more than all three of them put together but somehow I was a C student and they never made less than an A+.

"How about some wrestling?" Adonis suggests.

"I like that.  See.  That's what I'm talking about.  Some wrestling to get you guys aggressive about the beginning of the school year.  That's why I like you, Adonis.  Good idea.   Everyone pair up," Coach Tray states.

He does some more ass kissing.  It's a dumb fucking idea and everyone knows it but that's the thing about Lionsdale Highschool.  When Adonis spoke people just nodded in agreement because they were trying to be on his good side.

We all knew what happened when you weren't on his good side.

I head over to Richard Pierson.  Richard Pierson and I had an understanding.  We both hated sports and we both were ready to do the minimum required.  It'd been the same situation since middle school.

"You ready?" I ask him.

"We can pretend for a few minutes and go douse our foreheads with water and pretend like we're sweating," Richard says.

"Dope," I laugh, "Sounds like a deal."

We are about to start when all of a sudden I feel someone interrupting us.  I turn and notice who it is.  I turn and see Braden.

Braden Alexander, the Clown doll.  Braden was white with bleach blonde hair.  His hair was almost platinum.  It matched his skin tone and made him look edgy.  He had that kind of boy band look about him.  He looked like the type of motherfucker who was about to be in a Twilight spinoff.  He'd probably be great playing a sexy vampire or something.  Matter of fact, I think Braden was in some type of upcoming movie.

He always smiled.  Even now he was smiling.  Don't let the smiling fool you.  Braden Alexander could be a dickhead when he wanted to be.   There was nothing particularly nice about him.  I was pretty sure he was the one who made the comment earlier in the day about my dad's car.  I knew he did.  I would never confront him though.

Fuck no.  Lionsdale High was my world and Braden was one of the people who ran Lionsdale High.

"Can I cut in?" he asks Richard.

"Ye-ye—yeah..."

I look over at Richard.  He's stuttering.  I think he is a bit starstruck or something.  It has to be the first time ever that Braden Alexander said something to him directly.   I feel sold out.  He couldn't even help a brother out.  What about our understanding?   Fucking Richard was my height.  We were both 5'9".  Braden Alexander was about 6'2".  He was all muscle.  Solid and hard.

No, I didn't want to wrestle him.

"I was actually about to go use the bathroom," I try to excuse myself.

I turn over and see Adonis watching.  You can never tell what Adonis is thinking.  His face is just...beautiful.    I mean he has those beautiful eyes.  They just stare through you blank and cold.  Hell maybe Adonis and his friends were like those vampires in Twilight.  I had the shit figured out.  They had us all under a spell.  Maybe if we broke free of their spell we'll see they all had beer bellies.  I don't know.  Wishful thinking.

All I know is I am more nervous with Adonis watching.

"Naw you ain't.   Don't be a bitch now.  Say what you were saying when we weren't around,"  Braden Alexander states with a smile, "Go ahead."

My heart is racing.   Braden was smiling but I'd seen Braden beat someone's ass to the point that they couldn't even recognize the guy.  He smiled the entire time.

"What?"

"Bates told me what you said earlier, little bitch."

I turn over at Bates.  He's standing next to Adonis and Micah.  The look in his eyes says it all.  Bates told them everything I fucking said.

"Um..."

"You think me and my friends are plastic?" Braden asks.

"That's not exactly what I said.  I was just making a general statement."

"Yo---relax.  Why you look so nervous?" he asks, "Do I make you nervous?  I guess that's a dumb question.  Of course, I do.  I'm not going beat your ass kid.  OK?  Relax.   I'm just going to teach you a little lesson.  Let's wrestle, OK. Don't be a pussy...  I want to show you just how plastic I am."

He looks mad.  I know Braden wants to embarrass me.  Other people must have heard the conversation because before long people are crowding around me.  People circle around me like a fucking vulture.  I don't get it.  It was almost like they were ready to see me get embarrassed just like how Braden embarrassed others so many times before.  He had made sport out of doing this.

I look over at Richard.  Richard puts his hands up.  He's not going to help me.  I'm in this by myself.  I feel like shit.  Bates and David are the only other friends I have in this class and they both aren't even looking my way.

"Ok..." I state.

We circle around each other.  Braden is just looking swollen compared to me.  When he comes at me I panic and try to push him off but he manages to grab me toss me to the ground with ease.  My back hits the ground so hard I think I hear something crack.

A bunch of kids break out in laughter when I hit the ground.  I feel so embarrassed.

I roll away desperately.

I have to do something.  Anything!

I don't know what I'm thinking when I shoot my hand between his legs to pin him down.  Unfortunately, I shot my hand right up his shorts.  I spend what seems like an eternity groping around thinking, `what the hell is this.'

"Yo you trying to feel me up!"  Braden screams.

That's when I realize to my dismay in front of the whole class that he wasn't wearing any underwear.  I realized what I was feeling was his balls.  I just have this OMG moment and pull my hands out of his pants REAL fucking fast.

Everyone is looking at me.  I literally was feeling Braden up.  People had suspected I was gay.  I mean I was the only guy who really didn't go around school trying to fuck every girl.  And right now Braden had called me out in front of the whole class for feeling on his balls.

Accident or not I do the only thing I can think of.

I turn and run out of the gym class like a little bitch.

~

It's the middle of the day before I know it.   I try to put the events of earlier in the back of my head but I just have this feeling.  The feeling that people were watching me.  The feeling that I was getting attention.  For a guy like me attention was always negative.  You didn't want attention in Lionsdale High School.  It was the first day for godsakes.   The last thing I wanted was any attention.

I'm at my locker.  The locker is digital access.  You can actually put in your password and see right through it without having to open it up.  Just another benefit of being in this amazing school.  Just another reason everyone wanted to be in Lionsdale but only the wealthiest ever got in.

"Yogi...please tell me you weren't grabbing on Braden's balls earlier," a voice states, pressing on the locker near mine and making herself comfortable.

I turn over with my face blushing red.  That is my natural state at this point.  Something embarrassing always happens to me.  Luckily the girl is used to it.  My best friend Candice is there.  Actually, Candice is really my only friend.   We've been friends since we were kids.  Candice is the ideal nerd.  Her family made it big in IT, which was why she was able to come to a school like Lionsdale in the first place.

"Please let's not talk about it..." I respond.

Lionsdale was a decent sized high school.  We had about 1000 students.   You could disappear if you wanted to but once word got around about something it spread like wildfire.

We get to the lunch table.  I turn at that moment and realize it's the same thing as usual.  I take out my lunch.  It's packed.  It's because Lionsdale has catered food and it's really fucking expensive.  These kids didn't care.  They blew their fucking money.   They could care less.   Candice sits next to me.  She doesn't really get along with many girls.  Maybe it's because she has no fashion and she wears these glasses that swallow up her face completely.    She feels like the other girls don't want to be seen with her so she usually has lunch with me, David and Bates.

I notice however that David and Bates are sitting at another table, today.  It can't be a coincidence.  The four of us had lunch together every day for the last week.  Now it was like they weren't even looking my way.

"I mean if you did have to grab anyone's balls I would say start with Braden Alexander.  He's so fucking sexy," she states, "Not as sexy as Micah though.  Lord have mercy...Micah."

"Micah is a man whore..." I whisper to her.

It was true.  Rumor had it that Micah had a black book of all the girls he smashed in the school and never called back.  Of course, half those girls stalked him openly and the other half were obsessed.   Supposedly his dick was huge.

"You know the saying," my best friend tells me, "Every girl wants to be in love with Adonis, every guy wanted to be best friends with Braden and everyONE wants to fuck Micah."

"I'll pass on all of those."

"Nothing to be ashamed about for grabbing Braden's balls.  You can do a lot worse.  It's just that people are saying you came out of the closet.  I just wish you would have told me before you told anyone else."

My heart drops.

What the fuck!

"Who said I came out of the closet?" I ask.

"Serena.  Serena said she knew for sure that you were gay and that you came out of the closet this summer."

I'm not surprised by it.

"Serena O'Neil is a bitch," I respond.

Candice grabs me, "You can't...say things like that.  You know what happened with Fat Matt."

I literally shiver.  Fat Matt.  The story was literally legend at this point what the Dollhouse had done to Fat Matt.  Let's just say it was a sign for everyone in the future.  You don't mess with the Dollhouse.  I know better.  I should know better.  It's just so fucking hard.  Since I was a kid, Serena O'Neil had been the bane of my existence.

"Can we drop it, Candice?"  I ask, "My day has been horrible so far."

Candice looks over at me, "It always gets better.  I know things are bad for you.  I know your Dad is a little...rough around the edges since he came home from jail.  And I know that being here with kids who come from wealthy families makes you feel like you don't fit in.  I get it..."

"Do you?" I ask, "Do you really understand?"

I find it hard to believe.  I didn't think anyone really understood how it was like.

Candice presses a smile, "I'm your best friend Yogi.   I'm always going to be there for you.  And if you want to share anything with me...I'll still be there."

I knew what Candice was talking about. She wanted me to open up about my sexuality with her.  I want to as well.  I mean Candice was a friend.  At least I thought she was.  But it was just hard.  All of it was so hard.

"If only I could talk to my mother."

"She's in heaven smiling down on you.  You know that right?" Candice states.

I try to fake a smile.  Candice had no idea.

"She's in heaven, all right," I respond.

Just at that moment, I hear the heels.  My heart nearly collapses when I hear them.  I know who it is.  I know those heels from anywhere.  There is only one bitch in the world that walks as hard as this girl does.  Seeing her walk this hard I know some shit was going down.

I turn and see her.

Serena.

She's standing next to her brother Micah O'Neil and her best friend, Ivy.

"I need to talk to you, Yoshi."

"The name is Yogi," Candice corrects her.

Serena looks at Candice as though she is lower than a roach.  Serena was one of those pretty girls that was really pretty because she just had a lot of work done.   The amount of work she's had to have done must have cost hundreds of thousands.  You can just tell.  Her high cheekbones and her pumped up lips make her look like a doll.  Her big breasts, ridiculously small waist and large ass make her look like some long lost Kardashian.  I think she wants to grimace but her face seems so frozen that it barely moves.  She must have gotten some fresh botox or something.

"Whatever," Serena states, "My boyfriend wants to fight you after school.  He said you were molesting him..."

"Molesting him?" I state, turning to Micah, "Micah...you were there.  It was an accident.  I didn't fucking molest him."

Micah doesn't say a word.  I can see he looks a little surprised though that his older sister is bringing this up.  Serena was a senior.  Micah and I were Juniors.  You would think she had something better to do than fuck around with underclassmen.

He doesn't defend me.  He doesn't say a word.  He just stays completely quiet.  I don't even think Braden made this up at this point.  I honestly can look at Serena and just tell that the bitter bitch just wanted a reason to start some shit.

"This is the year of Weinstein.  And we just can't let you get away with it.  Sorry.  Hashtag #MeToo.   You are going to get your ass beat today.  I'm making sure of it.  I have a point to prove," she tells me.

With that she turns.  This is a game to her.  This was nothing more than a fucking game.  That's how I knew just how evil Serena was.  She was a fucking bitch.

I look over at Candice.  I knew she wanted to protect me. She wanted to stand up to Serena but I'm glad she didn't.  The last person to stand up to Serena was Fat Matt and we all knew how that turned out for him.  Let's just say it didn't turn out well.  I watch her squeeze my hand though.  I know she knows I'm not a fighter.

Braden would want payback for what I did earlier.

And I was going to get my ass beat.

~

It's towards the end of the school day.  What's worse is that Candice already volunteered for some event because she always had to be that girl involved in every extra-curricular activity.  David was ignoring all my texts and Bates was clearly kissing Dollhouse ass so he wasn't going to be there even if I needed him.

I was completely alone.

"Don't get your ass beat too bad, Yogi," a group of seniors states running past laughing, "Braden is waiting for you out front."

I sigh a little bit.  Bullying was real.  I didn't want to fight.  That wasn't what I was here for.  I didn't think I was a punk.  Hell, I'd fight someone around my size.  I'd fight someone like Richard or Bryan Waters any day.  This wasn't a fair fight.

I was about to get my ass handed to me and if I put up a fight I'm sure his friends would just jump me.

That's how things go.

Welcome to my reality.

I start towards the door when I feel a hand on my shoulder.

I turn.

"Come on."

It's Micah O'Neil.  He grabs me by my hand.   I'm shocked!   Before I know it we are running down the hall to the other side of the building.  He opens up the door and I find that he has a car ready for me out front.  We get in the backseat of the car.

The car is a Phantom and the person driving the car has to be Micah's driver.  Micah had that kind of money.  I knew that much.   The O'Neils were beyond rich.  They had to be the richest family in Lionsdale and that was saying a lot.   It was said that their family was worth billions.  It was more money than I'd ever see in my lifetime.  I knew that much.

"That was close..." he states.

"Yeah, almost got my ass beat."

He pauses.  Micah looks over at me.  The fact that he is here now helping me and literally is driving me away from the school towards safety blows my mind.

"We'll take you home..." Micah tells me.

"Why did you help me?"

Micah looks over at me.  It must be nice looking like Micah and having all this money.  Literally, this car is the nicest car I've been in.  It's the nicest car I've even seen.  His driver has a private partition up that is keeping our privacy.  There is a television playing.  Micah is relaxed in the car.  How can someone not be happy living a life with all this wealth and power?

He ignores my question almost completely, "You still live all the way out in Burlington Township right?  By the hood?"

I nod, "Micah.  You don't have to take me that far.  If you take me over to your house I can call my dad, tell him to come get me."

Micah gives me a long stare, "I hate it has to be like this...but you know it just...does. You know I can't do that..."

"Oh yeah, Serena would be pissed if anyone knew the truth."

"My mother is the one I'm scared of," Micah states, "Serena gets that bitchiness from somewhere and my mother would kill me if I brought you to our house."

I look over at him.  It kind of hurts hearing Micah say that.

"Your mom would be pissed?  I don't get it.  She was the one who paid for me to get into this school," I respond.

"I know.  My mom doesn't want to upset...well, you know who..."

"My mother is there then.  At your house...huh?"

I had figured this whole time.  I just hadn't known for sure.

"Yeah.  And she doesn't want to see you," Micah states, "I'm sorry, cousin.  I know that kind of hurts."

Reality did hurt.

The reality was that Micah and Serena were my cousins.

The reality was that my mother's last name was O'Neil and she came from the wealthiest families in the country.

The reality was that my mother wasn't dead.

The reality was my mother fell in love with a man, had a baby against the wishes of her family.  I was that baby.  And when shit got bad with my dad, when she couldn't do it anymore, she abandoned me and my father.  She ran back home.  She ran back to her money and her family and her wealth.  She completely abandoned me.

It would have been easier if she was dead.

That was my reality.

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