"The Golden Children of the Sun"
by
Timothy Stillman
The sea was blue. The breakers crashed. The wind blew proof it would be another hot day. The gulls screamed. Night was ending. The not as dark morning was late Autumn. Raven sat on the shore and his hair was long and dark. He was naked. This, early. Before anyone else was there. But the sea gulls cawing in the distance.
He loved the sea. He loved being far away. He loved missing Sunny. They were two years older than they had been when they had had fun in their sleeping bags in the back yard of Raven's mom's, while the family was on vacation, save for Raven. Who had the saddest/happiest time of his life. He loved Sunny.
Sunny did not love him. Sunny was experimenting, in being ready for girls. Raven sat on the beach and sifted sand through his fingers. He dropped grains of it on his upraised cock, a whole inch and a half longer than it had been two years ago, with more pubic hair. His smile was infectious. He smiled inside, for someone who would never be inside him, or he inside Sunny. For the forest of dreams, he was glad his father was transferred to France. And here was everything. The knowingness. The lack of decipherable language. The absence of Sunny. Which made Sunny brighter and more golden than he had ever been before.
He played with his cock. He rubbed the foreskin up and down. He shook it and moved it without touching it. He held his nut sac. He believed he could see Sunny across the sea. He wished his penis was a long golden bridge to a long golden boy, for Sunny to walk over and to his true love. Gold was in the sky now. Morning was washing up again, as the sea was washing up and back beside Raven.
How they had had fun that summer two years before. Jacking. Sucking. Sunny had finally let Raven suck his cock, and it had tingled every one of Raven's cells and had made him so hot he spurted immediately. And Sunny had backed away a bit from Raven on his knees, and had laughed. But Raven was determined. And continued with his blow job until Sunny exploded, and the sun was in shame.
They had cuddled. They had pretended fucking. They had loved being naked together. Raven, because of Sunny. Sunny, because of Sunny.
Sunny promised, half heartedly to write. Raven had magnified that half meant promise, drawn into no one's direction, as gospel. He checked his email three four or five times a day and night. Nothing. From anyone. He knew Sunny had forgotten him. And when these days Raven came, he came with weeping, and his sperm was a weeping as well.
There were boys here at Raven's school who liked him a lot. He smiled friendly. He was still a novelty. He had fine facial bone structure. His eyes danced. His hands always wiggled when he talked. He was infectious. To anyone, it seemed, other than the one who counted. What is eternity? Who would keep Raven company? Someone tell me please, he thought, as he ground his globe hips into the sand and came all over himself, closed eyed, thinking, Sunny, oh please Sunny.
And did not hear the miracle that was coming up behind him.
He thought of pale and morning and croissants and narrow streets and sidewalk artists and sidewalk cafes and being able to drink wine right at the table with his very own parents who did not mind. He thought I will give you France, all of it, Paris, and here, Cannes, and I will box it up and I will sell it for a penny, if you just give me back the glove of Sunny's hand which had learned to masturbate his friend. All in good fun. All in forlorn love. And they were there. Silent, even their eyes did not move.
They did not breathe almost. They were encroaching on Raven's dreams. His past. He could not leave his friend behind. For Raven's love was back there too, and that he could not leave, for it would be very lonely without him and might die out like a tiny flame in the wind that would cause the entire world to explode.
They were naked. The interlopers. They were Raven's friends. They were from his grade and a grade below and a few from a grade above. They were boys and girls. They had felt Raven's sadness for along time in this short time Raven had been there. One had seen him crying alone in the school lav once and had told the others and it made them very sad too. He seemed to have the world on his most un-Atlas shoulders.
Some of the boys had pubic hair, some had little or none. Some of the girls had almost formed breasts, some had puffy ones, and some had none at all save tits. Pubic hair differed from girl to girl. And the lack of same. The boys had hard ons. They were a little embarrassed to be here, naked, though nudity on public beaches was acceptable. Some had spied on Raven's early morning beach festivities and had told other who told others on stairwells and at lunch and in the gyms and on the phones and on the comps, and a plan began. A plan that was wondrous and generous and kind beyond all regard.
Not that they minded. Not that Raven was not beautiful. They loved his being American. They loved his shyness with their culture, his slip ups, his gawkiness which somehow for him was done with such unaware ease and grace.
Avon, a boy of Raven's age, who was closest to Raven, who had friends but always there was Sunny and the lack of him and therefore the realness of him the immediacy of him in between them. And Avon, being closest, reached down and put his hard on right at Raven's spine, Raven lost in sex memories that were illusions as the same time they were real, and finally now the tables were to be turned for him.
And he started, as if jolted with electricity, as he jerked around and saw the naked children. He turned away immediately, and huddled over his crotch and tried to hide his nakedness, blushing in his Mediterranean features, and holding his head low as possible. Thinking, I will get my trunks right over there, mere inches way, mere eternities away, they might as well be and I will put them on and run and run and fall and fall and I will run into the sea and no one will ever see me again.
And his heart tumbled and his mind roiled. And Eteinne came to his side and delicately as though raising a wilting flower put Raven's face to his own calf and held it there and brushed the long dark raven hair and looked down at him with such kindness it would have broken the heart of God, if God existed. Raven finally looked up at the sex above him and then at the owner of that sex, who smiled down at him lovingly, and said so sweetly "Raven", and then gradually at the other children. There was enough sun now for the children to be growing shadows.
They were not making fun of him. They smiled in summer. They smiled in a species of almost another set of beings, gentle beings, to whom rain meant something, and to whom snow had poetry in it. And though still blushing, Raven straightened up.
"We do not want you sad," Simone said as she knelt down on the other side of the no longer trembling embarrassed boy and she let him suckle her puffy breast while David took Raven's penis which was hardening again and put it in his most warm most moist mouth with a dancing tongue that sent gales of passion and rush and fun and carnivals and happiness through Raven.
And the sun was a little higher and the children gathered round Raven, and the sky would be blue today, and vacation would be over soon, but they would never part as they reached out for Raven and Raven reached out for them.
And thought, did Raven, what about this, Sunny Norquist? What you think about this, jerk ass? Chloe was preparing Raven to lie on top of her, and the other children were lining up Raven's penis top penetrate her. As a tear, one single insignificant tear trailed out of the corner of his left eye. Chloe thought it a tear of happiness.
Raven let her think so. It was such a miraculous gift of bodies and love and cheer they had brought him, and he thought as he entered her and she sighed and he sighed and then she asked him to wait, take it easy for a minute, as Raven's chest rose and fell and his heart beat hard and his penis throbbed to be in a girl, eager then still to be in a boy soon, and he knew without doubt that would happen.
Did I fuck a girl before you did, Sunny Norquist, you horndog you? And then she said push in delicately, as hands reached for Raven's butt and opened the globes. And his final thought before the fucking began was, Sunny. I would trade you all for Sunny, for five minutes of just being in his presence. I can't help it. I have no choice.
And as cum began to bubble and Raven kissed her breasts, he thought, before his mind exploded and the children of France enveloped him, please, oh please, do forgive me.
As the sand began to be hot. And the sea was enamel blue. And someday a golden boy bridge across it. Perhaps. Someday. As the naked children bodies, flowers from the sun, fell giggling all around him. Pray they will be enough.
the end Timothy Stillman B Keeper silvershimmer@earthlink.net