Copyright 2024 – Daemon D. Hart
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The Human Bearer
Speech wasn't ideal for what Junior tried to convey, so Riordan happily allowed his kid to show him. At first, it was all nothing but darkness, an unsettling sight that made him believe that Junior's mind had gone blank for some reason. Could it be that the fright from earlier had made his mind freeze when he tried to recall what he'd seen in that pond?
It lasted only for a bit. He was holding Junior and his eyes were closed, but he could see everything as if it was happening while wide awake. The darkness from before took the shape of what he had also seen when diving underwater. The lights above couldn't reach in there, not a lot. He could hear the beating of Junior's heart, the rhythm of his breathing. At the time, he must have been excited to meet his siblings, so much so that he hadn't waited for his parent to allow it.
Riordan started when his eyes, seeing through Junior's recent memory, caught something. The image cleared and snake tails coiled around each other, like a single, convoluted mass that twisted and shook from time to time. No... not snake tails. Riordan felt a jolt of apprehension and then quickly wrapped his arms around Junior. No wonder the boy had acted like that.
Those were more than snake tails. They were full snakes, and eyes, big and wet, opened at the same time, shining under the water like jewels. And Junior, the brave little one, had seemingly marched on, to see that strange apparition from up close.
One of the snakes darted forward, smacking Junior brusquely with its huge head. That must have been when the boy had come through the surface, shot through the air like from a cannon.
"What are they?" Riordan mumbled to himself.
"They're not real, dada," Junior repeated the same thing, showing his frustration over his inability to explain it.
"Were those... snakes... your brothers and sisters?"
Junior shook his head vehemently. "No. They weren't inside you. They must be inside you first, and before you, inside daddy. That's how brothers and sisters are made."
The young one surely had a strong point to make. And Riordan couldn't contradict him, on top of not wanting to. "Did they scare you a lot? Does it hurt where that snake hit you?"
Junior shook his head. "No." He seemed at a loss regarding what words to choose, just like his father that morning. "But they're not real," he insisted again.
"I believe you, baby," Riordan said and kissed the boy's forehead. What could he make of all that? Junior had just showed him what he'd seen. And Riordan now knew that the large tail he had glimpsed at that time hadn't been an adult Xeno, but one of those snakes. How did they go from being that to looking like they were Junior's younger siblings? His head hurt just trying to think about it. He didn't like it one bit. When he held those little ones in his arms, they felt real, unlike what Junior was saying. But then, what was the explanation for their different shapes? Shapes they hid from view, obviously.
Riordan felt his heart aching. He knew he loved those little ones; he felt it, with all his being. But while they were real, they weren't like any other Xenolites. Maybe that was what Junior was trying to say, with his still limited language.
"Did you see anything else?" he asked Junior.
The boy quivered as if touched by something disgusting. "No."
"Okay," Riordan said and held him close. "Don't worry, I won't let anyone harm you."
There was no point to torture the boy by forcing him to remember. He needed to talk to Xana about this. How much he wanted to have his friend Cario by his side, or Florent, or Kyle. He no longer felt protected on that ship, and not only because recent events – as recent as he could recall them – had included a new attack from the traitor that had to have been an ally of Gamni Gafilos. No, he felt something deeper, damaging his very core. How was he going to return tomorrow to that room with the pond and feed all those Xenolites that were – or weren't – supposedly his and Xana's children?
Junior had showed him everything he'd seen. And Riordan had been startled and frightened, too. Was Marn even aware of the dimensions his little experiment was reaching? Did he know what those Xenolites were? He had to ask Xana if there had ever been a time in their evolution when Xenos were actually snakes, without any human-like parts or traits. Junior was far too young to know about such things. For him, such things weren't supposed to exist. Hence the way he insisted so much on those Xenolites not being real.
Florent had guarded his communication with Xana that time, but now he didn't have the same luxury. Wait, what was he thinking now? Riordan straightened up, pulling Junior along, although the kiddo was already asleep in his arms. He was free to walk everywhere on the ship, right? He could visit Florent and ask him to help again.
As he thought of his friend, another thing flashed through his mind. Florent's words about the eggs Jasno had been supposed to carry. There were no eggs – Florent's exact words. And yet, Jasno had been adamant about having them, about losing them, and experiencing the pain, both physical and emotional, of losing them.
"What the hell..." Riordan murmured to himself.
His mind was reeling, trapped on a hamster's wheel. Gamni's ability to manipulate time. Jasno losing eggs that didn't exist. Marn's desire to use the traitor general's special skillset to recreate... what? Or just... create?
"Junior, we're going to pay Florent a visit," he told his sleeping child. There was no way he would leave Junior alone, not with everything that was happening right now. Florent would help him contact Xana safely, which meant that he would be able to tell his husband to hurry home so that they could talk.
He stepped out of the room, and right away, two lizard guards barred his way.
"What's the meaning of this?" he asked.
"It is for your own safety to remain inside," one of them said.
"I don't have only half a brain," Riordan said sharply. "I believe I can take care of myself."
"We have direct orders."
"Such as keeping me under arrest? What exactly is my crime?" Riordan got into the guard's face, but the lizard's face remained as impassive as always.
"Please return to your quarters. You are safe there."
"And if I don't want to do as you say?"
"We have orders to let His Royal Chancellor know. And to restrain you."
Riordan frowned and eyed the gear the lizard guard was wearing. Those were weapons of some sort. While he doubted they'd shoot him down or something crazy like that, there were other ways they could use to incapacitate him. Had he been alone, he'd have taken his chances, but he didn't want to have Junior traumatized on the account of his stupidity.
"Just whose side are you guys on?" he asked as he started to retreat into the room.
"On the side of the Xeno race," the lizard guard replied calmly.
That, if they knew what it even meant to be on the side of Xenos. What was Marn playing at? Riordan sat on the bed and cradled Junior in his arms. Yes, he was a big boy, but he was still his parents' little boy. And Riordan needed to protect him, no matter what it took.
It must have been late, and overwrought with worry as he was, he had fallen asleep. Xana woke him up gently and kissed him on the lips. "I see that you haven't touched your lunch. Has Junior eaten anything?"
They talked as if they were just another family.
"Don't worry. He might have missed me, but he missed my tit more," Riordan joked. "He got his fill, although he did care to inform me that he finds ice cream to be a very interesting Earthian food, and that part of my menu did disappear now that I'm checking."
Xana chuckled and kissed him again. "He has quite the appetite. And I think other items vanished from your meal, as well."
As much as he enjoyed that sort of domestic small talk, there was no time to lose. "Xana, we have to talk. Today was one hell of a weird day."
"Go ahead. I'm listening."
Riordan hesitated for a bit. "Do you think anyone's listening in to what we're saying right now?"
"We can never be too sure, but as far as I know, it's safe for you to speak to me here," Xana replied and took him by the shoulders.
He took a deep breath and began explaining the events of the day, hoping that he hadn't missed any important detail. With Junior sound asleep in his water tank, they didn't have to worry about triggering unpleasant memories in the child, either.
Once he finished, Xana remained silent for quite a while. Riordan didn't disturb him, as he expected his big-brain husband to process everything.
"Your question about our evolution is on point," Xana started. "We did use to exist as full-bodied snakes, but don't imagine for a moment that we were the same as the beasts you call that on Earth."
"What were you? And was that really you? I mean, we have a theory of evolution on Earth, too. And while we have ancestors from which we turned into the human race, that doesn't mean that we call those human."
"That is one major difference between you and us," Xana said. "There are two major schools of thought on the matter, but the consensus is that the primordial Xenos were a particular species of reptiles, maybe similar in physical appearance with the snakes you have on Earth, but different in many other – more important – ways. The telepathic hive we share; it comes from them. Our ability to learn and ingest vast amounts of knowledge; they had it. And they were warriors and the conquerors of the universe as they knew it long before us."
"What are the two schools of thought you mentioned?"
"One of them considers that our current shape is the result of an upward evolution. The other, a downward spiral."
"Wow," Riordan said slowly. "Don't tell me. And it's the same thing that split the Xeno society in two regarding human bearers."
Xana nodded. "Exactly. In our quest to conquer other species, the need to find good mates to carry our eggs was only one imperative. The other, let's say that it wasn't directly acknowledged. It was this. Finding the path for evolving further."
"And you stumbled upon Earth. People that looked half like you. But the half that some Xenos wasn't so crazy about."
"Yes," Xana confirmed. "The search for the primordial shape, a return to the pure form, took quite the turn with such a discovery."
"And? Are you going to turn all into humans?" Riordan found the idea ridiculous, even as he let it flow out of his mouth.
"I doubt it. But something significant is happening to our evolution, for sure. And it's because of our pairing with you."
Riordan caught his head in his hands. "This doesn't help things make more sense. Those children... they're snakes. They're that pure form you're talking about. That's why they thought Junior was small compared to them."
"I am not a supporter of the pure form school of thought," Xana explained. "Nor is His Royal Chancellor."
"And yet," Riordan pointed out, trying his damnedest not to sound like he was accusing his husband of anything, "he put us into a breeding pen, and now we have children... that are unlike any other Xenolites."
"It baffles the mind," Xana admitted with a short nod.
"And then, there's also what Junior said. They're not real. What Florent said about Jasno's eggs. There were no eggs. What do you make of it?"
Xana remained lost in thought again. Then, he looked at Riordan, searching his face. "There has to be an explanation for all this. And also a reason why the boys and girls have to remain there, in that particular area, and we're not allowed to take them home with us."
"Fuck," Riordan murmured. "Are they... what? Figments of our imagination? I breastfed them today enough to know they're pretty much real. But then, again, when Gamni took me away... that prison was real, too. And pain was real. And giving birth to Junior... we know that happened. What the hell is going on, Xana? I feel like I'm losing my mind. And did I mention? Today, those guards in front didn't let me go anywhere under threat of restraining me if I attempted to move freely."
Xana frowned. "I have no knowledge of this. It looks to me like His Royal Chancellor is taking things too far. Why keep such secrets from us?"
"I suppose his mind is as tough as Fort Knox. No one can get inside his head," he added at Xana's questioning look.
"That is true." Xana began moving through the room, his face all a frown. "The traitor had both the two Xenos he inhabited and Jasno the bearer believe that there were eggs inside that human body. And yet, there weren't any."
"What happened to them?" Riordan asked.
Xana waved. "Executed."
"What? Jasno, too?"
"No, just them. They must have had thoughts of rebellion before for the traitor to access their minds so easily. As for the bearer, he is currently full of eggs. Real eggs," Xana said and his features pinched in the middle as he seemed to turn something over in his head.
"As punishment?" Riordan asked. "I don't like the guy, but seriously, that sounds excessive. And I doubt his empty head had anything to do with the traitor's plan."
"It was mercy, more like," Xana explained. "The illusion of those eggs rattled his mind gravely. To save the integrity of his thought process, His Royal Chancellor decided to fulfill his need, as much as his body can take it. He is, as I was told, in a state of bliss."
"Although I'm thinking that he didn't get the same treatment as us. His eggs are real."
"Are you starting to believe, just like our boy, that those Xenolites don't truly exist?"
Riordan shrugged. "Well, it might sound crazy, but Junior's just a child, not someone with an agenda. Everything he says is the truth, as much of it as he can see. I'll take his word over Marn's every day. But if they're not real--" He stopped abruptly as only then he noticed the expression of pain on Xana's face. "What is it?" he asked and stood to move closer.
Xana closed his eyes. "It is an unfathomable thing. A sort of pain. I can't easily describe it."
Riordan wrapped his arms around his husband's body. "It's okay. I think I do understand what you're going through. You saw your tribe, so many kids, ours, and that might not be true, right? If they were never ours, could we mourn their loss?" he wondered out loud.
He yelped as Xana suddenly grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him. "Riordan, you are an amazing human."
"What?"
Xana let him go and rubbed his forehead. "If they're not real, we can't care if we lose them, right?"
"That's sort of what I said, but I was really wondering, because I'm not so sure I can so easily endure the thought. I looked at them. I stared into their eyes. They were in my arms."
Xana stopped and pulled him in for a quick hug. "You got the shortest end of the stick here. I had no time to grow that attached, I see now. His Royal Chancellor asked me to come to work so quickly. And even so, the thought alone, of not having them at all, is causing me pain. More so to you." There was deep tenderness in his eyes as he looked at Riordan. "I have to make His Royal Chancellor explain his plan to me. This can't be a simple coincidence. Everyone else on the ship, as far as I know, follows a normal program, even as breeding is concerned."
"What about Cario?" Riordan asked. "Drato? Is he back?"
Xana shook his head. "I'm sorry, but he's still in a bad shape. Cario will have to choose other Xeno husbands, eventually."
"No way, he can't be okay with it. He's pregnant with twins. They belong to Drato, those kids. And Dario? And what about Kyle?"
"Dario is back in his parent's arms. Kyle is being repaired. The damage a being like that can cause is not easy to offset. It served me well that Gamni's poison made me immune to such tricks. With Ferix's help, of course."
"I'm sorry I have so many questions on top of what is happening with our kids that might not be our kids at all... oh, Xana, what kind of mess is this? I think I'd feel a lot better if I knew. Even if it's bad, really bad."
"I'm of the same mind. And I wish I could offer you more answers. Rest assured, I plan on questioning His Royal Chancellor at length."
"And those Xenolites? I don't want to leave Junior here alone tomorrow, while I'm still supposed to go see them. I'm so torn I don't know where to begin. And your father, he's still in Ferix's care. I really miss him."
Xana caressed his head while holding him tightly. "I know. You're not the only one. But we will figure it out. I will not rest until I get to the bottom of it."
Riordan felt better already. Xana's warmth made him feel like that. It was simply what he needed.
tbc
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