Jon was looking forward to getting home after what had turned out to be a trying day at work. He was production manager for a company that did a lot of government contract work in the aerospace field. He prided himself on keeping to schedule and hated days when the work fell behind. This was one of those days.

"Damn it--I need a drink," he said to himself as he pulled up to The Inn in the middle of his condominium complex. The neighborhood was more like a small town than a condo complex. It had a convenience store, a restaurant/bar, three swimming pools, and a sizeable lake.

Jon found a seat at the crowded bar and Kevin, the bartender, brought him his usual vodka tonic. Jon swirled the ice in his drink with his straw, then took a long sip. He looked out the window at the lake and thought about how he was going to tackle work the next day. Even when he was trying to relax he had a difficult time not thinking about work. It was pretty much his whole life since his partner, Michael, had died just over two years ago. He didn't know any other way to deal with it, so he just threw himself into his work and didn't let the rest of the world in.

As he sat contemplating the ice in his drink, Jon became aware of someone at the service bar to his right. He glanced over and noticed a guy about his age--30--waiting for the bartender. Jon smiled and nodded and the guy did the same. The stranger was wearing faded 501s and a white t-shirt, and had a heavy five o'clock shadow. He had black hair, kind of spiked, neatly trimmed longish sideburns that flared slightly and the most striking blue eyes. At first Jon thought he must be wearing some kind of colored contacts, but since he had a good side view he could tell the man wasn't. He was, quite possibly, the most incredibly good-looking man Jon could remember seeing.

Kevin delivered the man's beer and as he turned to find a table, Jon again nodded and smiled, which was returned.

Jon made a couple of surreptitious glances to see more of the man. He was sitting alone at a small table, facing the other way. Jon noticed he had a muscular build under his t-shirt, with broad shoulders and a narrow waist.

"God, I hope his being here isn't a fluke," Jon thought as he ordered a second drink.

Even though it was open to the public, because of its location the bar's patrons consisted primarily of residents of the complex and most knew each other, at least by sight or well enough to exchange hellos.

After a few minutes Jon decided it was safe to take another glance. When he turned, he was devastated to see an empty chair and an empty glass on the table.

"Damn, how did I let that happen?" he thought.

Jon waited and ordered another drink, in case the man had gone to the john and was coming back. After ten minutes it was apparent he had left, so Jon finished his vodka tonic and left to go home.

Jon's work week turned out to go more smoothly than it had started. Production was back to its normal, hectic pace and that worked well for Jon. He liked to be busy and in control. It made the days go by quickly.

Jon usually went to The Inn once or twice a week after work, but this week he found himself there every night. He was hoping to see his man again, but he didn't. After returning home Friday, he decided he probably wouldn't have the chance to meet him. Besides, Jon reasoned, the guy couldn't be as hot as he remembered. He hadn't been affected so strongly by a man in years, and the man's image frequently invaded Jon's thoughts. Seeing him again could only be a disappointment.

Saturday afternoon Jon went to the bar to get a bite to eat. As soon as he entered he spotted the stranger talking with Paul and Joe, a couple of guys Jon knew. "At last! This is even better than I'd hoped for," Jon thought as he walked toward the group.

"Hey, Jon!" Paul and Joe said in unison.

"Hi, you guys," Jon replied. He wanted to ask the stranger, "Who are you, and where have you been?" but thought better of it. And contrary to Jon's earlier uncertainty, seeing the stranger up close, he was even hotter than Jon remembered, if that was possible. Jon extended his hand and said, "Hi, I'm Jon."

The stranger looked Jon in the eye and smiled. "I'm Luke. Glad to meet you."

"Oh God!" Jon thought as he shook Luke's hand. "Perfect teeth, perfect smile, and those eyes!" He was hoping his nervousness didn't betray him.

Paul suggested, "Let's get a table on the patio. It's too nice an afternoon to be inside."

After finding a table that afforded some shade, they settled into their seats and chatted. Luke seemed a little quiet, but Jon assumed that was because he was new to the group. Joe offered to get the next round of drinks and went inside to the bar. Jon had completely forgotten about eating.

Finally Jon couldn't stand it--he had to know. He asked, "Luke, do you live here?"

"Yes, I bought a condo and moved in last weekend. I've spent the week getting settled in and this is about my first break. I'm pretty much done with the place, at least for a while."

Joe arrived with the fresh drinks. Jon raised his glass to Luke, saying, "To our newest neighbor. Welcome to the community!" They all clinked their glasses.

The four men talked for another hour, Jon hanging on every tidbit of information he could find out about Luke. He learned Luke was in construction (that explained the body) and had moved here from Chicago. He had a one-bedroom condo and lived alone, and didn't have a girlfriend. Jon was encouraged by that revelation, but he reminded himself that Joe and Paul didn't have girlfriends either and he was sure they were straight. Jon knew he was probably grasping at straws but he couldn't help it. It was all he could do just to maintain his composure.

Having finished their drinks, the group decided to call it a day. Luke thanked Joe for the drink and shook hands with each of them, saying he'd enjoyed meeting everyone. As they walked toward the parking lot Luke headed in the opposite direction.

"Luke, do you want a lift?" asked Jon.

"Nah, I'm only a block away. But thanks."

"Any time. See you later--have a good one."

Jon drove the half-mile to his building, parked and shut off the engine. He dropped his hands to his lap and stared straight ahead, going over the past couple of hours in his mind. Finally he took a deep breath and exhaled with a sigh. "Come on, Jon, get a grip," he chided himself. "Luke isn't giving you a second thought right now. Get your shit together."

He sighed again and got out of the car, locked it and headed to his building's entrance. He noticed, with pleasure, that crocuses were coming up in the planters. Jon stopped to get his mail, which consisted mostly of junk. All of his bills and most anything else of importance he received via email. Suddenly the security door burst open and he heard a familiar voice.

"Hi, Sunshine! How are you?"

"Oh, hi Cathy. What's up?"

"I am! It was a gorgeous day, I ran my two miles, did all my shopping, had a winning lottery ticket, and now I'm ready to collapse with a glass of wine."

"Good for you! How much did you win?" Jon asked.

"Twenty-five bucks! I'm rich! Hey, come on over when you're done. I made a huge pot of lentil soup and I need you to taste it and see if I forgot anything."

"I don't know, Cath, I'm kinda beat tonight."

"Aw, come on. I promise I won't keep you late, and it's not like you have a long trip back home. Besides, it's been a while since we've had a chance to have a girl-talk."

Jon smiled. "All right, give me about twenty minutes."

"Great! See you in a bit, hon."

Jon finished sorting his mail and headed to the elevator. He decided he was glad he'd run into Cathy and accepted her invitation. She had become a good friend in the past year or so and he enjoyed her company. Besides, he thought, maybe it would distract him from thinking (obsessing?) about Luke.

Jon entered his condo and went straight to open the balcony door to let in some fresh air. He loved this time of year, when the trees were just beginning to show a hint of awakening. As he went back inside he didn't bother closing the screen. It was still too early for there to be any insects.

After scanning his email and finding nothing that couldn't wait, he proceeded to the bedroom and undressed. He considered jumping in the shower, but decided he really didn't need one, and it would probably take too long. So he pulled on a pair of navy blue sweat pants and a grey t-shirt. He went into the bathroom, brushed his teeth and splashed some water on his face and hair, which he wore in a short buzz cut. Generally during the summer he kept his hair at 1/8 inch or even less, and let it grow out to maybe a half inch during the winter. After toweling off he looked in the mirror and deemed himself presentable. He left, locked his door and took the stairs down one flight to Cathy's floor and knocked on her door.

"Come on in, sweetie, it's open," she yelled.

Jon entered and immediately the aroma of home cooking filled his nostrils. Cathy was an excellent cook and she loved nothing more than enjoying her efforts with whomever stopped by. No one ever left hungry, and usually with a container of leftovers.

Cathy was on the phone. She waved and mouthed "My mother" to Jon as she rolled her eyes.

"I gotta go, mom, I have company. Jon. Okay, I will. Yeah. Okay. Love you, too. All right. Talk to you soon. Uh huh. Bye." She hung up the phone and turned to Jon. "You know I love my mother to death, but sometimes..."

"I know. She can be a bit, uh, talkative at times."

She gave Jon a look that said he'd just made the understatement of the year.

"Anyway, she said to say hello for her. Make yourself comfortable, I'll have it ready in a minute. Did you eat dinner? I have some chicken. I'll make you a sandwich to go with the soup.

"Thanks, but no. I'm not that hungry tonight. The soup will be fine.

"Well, all right, but come over here and taste this. I think it might need something."

Jon went into the kitchen and sampled the soup from the spoon Cathy offered.

"Mm, I think it's great the way it is. I wouldn't tamper with perfection," he enthused.

She smiled. "Well, let's sit and eat. Do you need anything? Salt, pepper?"

"Maybe some Tabasco. I'll get it." Jon got up to go to the refrigerator. He resumed his place and began to eat. "This is delicious, Cathy, really. You know, I've never tasted anything you've cooked that was less than outstanding. How'd you learn to cook like this?"

"From my mother, she's a very good cook but in all modesty I think I'm a little better. I guess it comes naturally to me. I just know what I like and I guess I have a flair for what goes well together."

"Well, I know that somewhere out there some very lucky young man is going to discover you and steal you away from us."

"Yeah, right. Like that's gonna happen any time soon," she replied with a wry grin.

If the truth be told, Cathy would love nothing more than for that young man to be Jon. She had fallen for him the first time they met. He was smart, polite, fun to talk to and impossibly handsome. Whenever she saw him, she thought "David Beckham." But once they got to know each other, she learned he was mourning the loss of his partner and was gay. She was crushed, but determined they could still be friends on a platonic level. Even though she knew it could never be more than that, there was always that "what if..." thought in the back of her mind.

"Earth to Jon. Earth to Jon. Come in."

Jon looked up sheepishly. He realized he had been staring into his bowl. "What?"

"Don't give me 'what.' You've been zoned out for the past five minutes. What's on your mind?"

"Nothing. Just work, I guess," he answered, knowing she didn't believe him.

"Bullshit! If it was work, you'd be bitching about it. If it was anything else, you'd be talking about it. So...what's his name?"

"What makes you so sure there's a 'him'?"

"Well, let's see. I don't think you've suddenly developed an intense interest in studying lentils, you aren't eating in your usual ravenous manner, and you have that 'lost puppy dog' look on your face. So spill it."

Jon regarded her for a moment with a pained smile. "Okay, you got me. Damn, you can read me like a book. Yeah, I met a guy today and he really threw me. I mean, it was like a bolt of lightening or something. I've seen him once before, but today was the first time I talked to him and got to know a little about him. I haven't felt like this about a guy since Michael."

"Whoa! Time out. You just met this dude today, and you're pining away like some schoolgirl? He must really be something else!"

"He is. I mean he's gorgeous and all, and he seems like a nice person, but I don't even know if he's gay. He probably isn't. I just can't stop thinking about him. I know, I'm making a fool of myself."

Cathy looked at him. "Yeah, maybe a little. I mean you're going to have to deal with this, pronto. Don't torture yourself, hon, you can't let yourself get this emotionally charged when you don't even know whether he's available. I just don't want to see you get hurt."

"I know. I'm being ridiculous. It's just that these feelings I'm having are so strong. I'll be okay. I just need a little time to put stuff in perspective."

Cathy perked up. "Hey, if this guy is that good, why don't you introduce me to him. That way he can have his pick and maybe we can share him!"

"No offense, babe, but if he picked me, I wouldn't be sharing him with anyone."

After they finished the soup, Cathy went to the kitchen and ladled a large portion into a plastic container. She put the container into a bag and handed it to Jon.

"Thank you, I'll enjoy this. And thanks for dinner, and for listening to my sob story."

"Any time, babe, any time. And you'd better keep me informed of any progress, hear?"

"You'll be the first to know. Who else am I gonna tell?"

Cathy smiled at Jon, stood on her toes and pecked him on the cheek. "Sweet dreams, hon. Thanks for coming by."

"Thanks. See ya," Jon replied as he walked to the stairs.

Jon, Paul, Joe and Luke got into the habit of meeting at the bar two or three times a week after work. Sometimes a few others would join them, but even though nothing was said, somehow the four had become a core group, seldom not all being together. Within a few weeks they had all become good friends.

And so their routine continued into summer, punctuated by swimming, volleyball and whatever else they felt like doing. Jon was still smitten with Luke and his feelings only got stronger the better he got to know him. But he never got any indication the attraction might be mutual and decided to err on the side of caution. Jon valued the friendship too much to jeopardize it and risk losing everything. So he kept his feelings for Luke in check, only allowing them to surface in his fantasies.

# # #

Please let me know what you think of the story so far. If there's interest I'll continue the saga. Comments, both good and critical, are appreciated. Email me at:

justin1326@gmail.com