The Recruiter By: Julien
This story is 100% fictional and is by no means depictive of the life of any person, place or thing. It contains sexual activities between males and should only be read if it is legal to do so in your area. Read at your own risk and enjoy. Comments are welcomed and would be very much appreciated. ENJOY!
"Did you hear?" "What? What's going on?" "Where have you been man? The War. We're getting ready to go to war!" All day I had been hearing a rumor here, a mutter there but I didn't believe that it would actually come to pass. But if Shane was telling me, it had to be true, after all he worked directly under our Commander. "Is it official?" "Yeah! They're prepping the planes for take off at 0600. "But they haven't signaled the sirens yet..." and at that moment, the alarm sounded and the Commanders' booming voice came over the loud speaking directing all flight deck personnel to meet in the mess hall. "There you go..." he said looking up. "Well I got to go but I'll meet you back here when we break ok." "Ok, let me know what happens." "Will do." And I was off in the direction of the mess hall.
As I listened to the commander describe the situation I got a feeling of dread deep in the pit of stomach. The prospect of war had crossed my mind very often but to have it actually declared just sent shock waves throughout my body. And as I tried desperately to listen to what was being said, I couldn't help but think of my family back home. According to the commander, they already announced the move to strike to the media so every branch of the military was being prepped. "So ladies and gentlemen we are at the heels of a war and you must all be strong. No one wants this but we must do what we have to keep our families and our friends safe. We are here to defend or freedoms and we will do our country proud!" At this, the cheering rose a notch. "I'm glad to see the enthusiasm but I want you all to take a moment to say the Lords prayer with me." With that, silence swept the room as he led our group into prayer. He ended with an AMEN and then dismissed us to our posts immediately. Walking outside on the deck I couldn't help but think about that first meeting with Marcel, the first question he asked me: "Why do you want to join?" And my response being that of confusion. Well I wasn't confused anymore. I knew why I was here and there was no turning back.
The call that I placed to my father at midnight was one of the most important calls of my life. Who knew if we would speak again after this. "Hello?" "Daddy, it's me." "Jesus Stephen, thank God it's you. I heard on the news that your ship is headed to War. Is it true?" I heard the desperation in his voice, the fear that he felt that something would happen to me so I tried my best to soften the blow. "Yeah, it is but my ship is not the only one. We're supposed to be getting some help from two other carriers." When he sighed I knew his mind was still wary. "It's gonna be ok dad, believe me. After all, I'm serving in the best military there is." I heard him chuckle at the other end of the line and that put my mind at ease a bit. "But anyway dad I got to go, the other guys need to use the phone..." "I know Stephen." He pause for a second then continued, "Please take care of yourself ok. Come back home safe, please. I love you." And with a long line of hardcore sailors behind me I told my father that I loved him. The usual jarring that would accompany such public displays of affection was not present as the seriousness of what we were about to do set in.
SEVEN MONTHS LATER:
After six months of intense prepping another carrier was replacing us, we were going back home to San Diego. I couldn't have been happier if I had won the lottery. For six months we had been on high alert readying ourselves to be of assistance if we were called but at the last minute the threat of war led Iraq to back down, for now. The government was not taking any chances so a Navy carrier was to be stationed at the border in case the need arised. At the news of our trip home, Shane came bursting into my compartment and threw himself on me. "This is the best fucking Christmas present ever." I knew the feeling and I was getting that feeling so I threw him off, an action he didn't seem to mind. "So what you gonna do when we get back to shore?" "I'm gonna go to New York! What else. My babys' waiting for me." And that look came over his face. That same look he got every time he talked about Christopher. They had only been together those seven days during fleet week but it seemed that they spent those days well. Already Shane had told me that the boy could fuck. And of course the phone calls that he was allowed to make went straight to New York. I had also seen the letters that had been exchanged back and forth between the two of them and I knew that Shane had fallen hard for this Hispanic Adonis. He told me that when his stint was up in a few weeks he would be moving to New York to be closer to Chris and to attend Columbia University. And to say the least, all this talk about love and happiness had me feeling like shit. My heart was in ruins and here I was silently wishing that Shane could be as miserable as I was so that we could both talk about men being shit heads and so on but no matter how down in the dumps I was, I wouldn't allow my misery to ruin Shane's' apparent happiness. He must have noticed the dejected look on my face as he stopped talking and took a seat at the edge of my cot. "I'm sorry Stephen. Here I am going on and on like an asshole when you're obviously still getting over..." "Don't say his name, please." "I won't but Stephen I wish you would call him, at least to clear your mind." I turned to him, "And what good would that do? What could he possibly say to me to make me feel any better? How about 'Stephen it was a good fuck but all good things must come to an end and besides, my wife doesn't appreciate the fact that I'm fucking a recruitee.'" "You know he wouldn't say that." "No but he could say something almost as bad. Just drop it Shane. I'm happy for you and Christopher, just don't try to help me out on this one ok." "Ok." He said rubbing my back gently. "It'll get better man." He said getting up and heading to his own cot.
Being back home provided me the chance to just mellow out and relax and to think about where my life was heading. My stint was almost over and I had nothing lined up to take its' place. My dad was hoping that college would be a viable option but I wasn't too sure. I thought about reenlisting but decided against it, after all, I don't know if I could stand to be closeted for another four years. Since coming back, my list of 'friends' and potential 'love interests' had amazingly increased as everyone flocked to the hometown 'war hero'. I didn't even have to as much as pick up a gun and they were already spreading the propaganda of what I had or in reality hadn't done. "Everybody is so proud of you Stephen, everybody including your mother." At the mention of her name I seized up. I knew that she had been staying here while I was gone because I could smell her distinct smell, not a bad one but unique only to her. I wasn't about to come out of my face and curse my father as he had every right to allow anyone to stay here that he chose, even her. "I don't want to discuss her."
Well we have to talk about her Stephen, talk about what she did to you, we have to resolve this before it's too late." The look of confusion on my face must have prompted him to continue, "She has cancer Stephen, terminal brain cancer. She's going to die and she wants to make amends." I would have thought that prospect of her being dead and buried would bring glee but all it managed to do was to make me cry. My father pulled me into a hug and gently rubbed my back. "I know she hurt you Stephen, she hurt me too but her last wish is for you to forgive her, can you please do that for her, please." At that I could feel his shoulders vibrate and I knew that he was crying. My father never got over her leaving him, never, so I knew that this must have especially hard on him. And I decided that I would at least go and see her, if anything to tell her how I felt about what she had done to us, to me. That trip to the hospital was one of two hardest trips that I ever had to make. I had bought some flowers to give her but I couldn't even bring myself to walk into her room. The nurse must have passed me at least three times wondering why I was still outside. On her fourth trip she spoke, "Visiting hours are almost over sir." "I know, maybe I should come back another time." She took the seat beside me and put her hands on my shoulders. "She doesn't have a long time left so I think you should go see her. She has been asking for you." At that I sucked in my pride, told her thanks and stepped into the hospital room. Looking at the figure on the bed I couldn't believe that it was my mother. She looked so frail, so weak, so helpless and in a way she reminded me of myself, the way I felt that night. I cautiously walked up to her bedside and placed the flowers in a vase. Her eyes were closed but they opened as soon as my foot hit against a box on the side of the bed making a sound. "Stephen?" "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you." I was surprised at how meek my voice sounded and how cracked it became. "It's ok baby, I'm glad you came." And I couldn't help being an asshole this one last time, "I came because dad asked me to." She shook her head as if knowing then stretched out her hands to me. I recoiled unconsciously leading her to turn her face away from me. I could see that tears were forming in her eyes and I cursed myself for doing it. "I understand you hate me for what, for what I allowed to happen to you all those years ago. I was so stupid then Stephen. I had such a good family and I threw it away." I wanted to know why. "I thought there was something better out there for me. We got married so young. I was only seventeen when I had you and your daddy insisted we get married. I loved him and you but..." her voice cracked and she started to sob. I reached over and held her hand. "I just thought that there was more life for me to live. And when that, that animal did that to you. Oh god Stephen, how could I let that animal do that to my own son?" She bursts into another sob and withdrew her hand from mine covering her face. Seeing her there so vulnerable, baring her soul made me start to cry. "My baby, please forgive me. I love you so much, please forgive me." And as she begged for my forgiveness I finally accepted in my heart that what was done was done. We couldn't go back and change it but we could start to rebuild whatever relationship we could before it was too late. What I didn't realize was that that night would be the last night I would see my mother. Shortly after returning home my father got the phone call that he had been dreading, my mother had passed away. A sudden stroke. He sat at the table and just stared into thin air not saying anything. I tried to comfort him but he told we he wanted to be alone. I didn't allow myself to cry, not then. But I did cry three days later as they spread her ashes into the ocean as a small gathering looked on. I completely broke down and my father had to literally carry me back to the car. Back at home we spent the remainder of the day talking about the better times we had had with my mother. My father relayed to me for the first time how they met and fell in love and while I listened on, I laughed at all that they had to go through to keep their love alive. It reminded me of better times with HIM. My father had told me that he had called a lot just to find out how I was and when I would be home. I still assumed that my father knew absolutely nothing about what went on between us so I played it cool and told him that I was too busy to return the phone calls. He saw right through my act though, "Why do you do this Stephen?" "What?" "Push everyone away. Since you were a baby, you always been pushing everyone who ever tried to show you some affection away. You did it with your mother, you did it to me and now you're doing it to him." I still played dumb, "I don't know what you're talking about dad." His next reaction forced me to sit and to re-think, "Cut the BULL SHIT Stephen! You sit around the house doing absolutely nothing and when you do get out, you come home depressed. You used to be so happy when you first started serving. What happened to that enthusiasm?" I just broke down and told him what was bothering me, "it's in New York hanging with his wife daddy." "Oh Stephen, why didn't you tell me?" I cried on his shoulder as he hugged me. "I wanted to daddy, I wanted to so bad but I couldn't. I'm such a failure daddy. He didn't want me, he didn't want me." And as I repeated that mantra over and over, I let out what seemed to be months of frustration.
WELL THAT'S IT FOR NOW. MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL MY READERS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR. I WILL BE AWAY FOR A WHILE BUT LOOK OUT FOR A NEW POSTING TO THIS IN JANUARY WHEN I GET BACK. CONTINUE TO SEND YOUR COMMENTS ANDLET ME KNOW WHAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE. THANKS FOR THE SUPPORT.