Disclaimer
This is a work of fiction. Although the story does involve characters from the Backstreet Boys, it is by no means a reflection on their lives or sexuality. Any similarities to them or other stories is purely coincidental. If you are under the legal age to be reading this or are offended by homosexual relationships please do not continue. Thank you.
The Shape of My Heart - Part 1 _______________________________
This was going to be a long day. I had just flown in from London, and was transiting in New York waiting for my connection to Los Angeles. This was my first time in America and I was so excited. My original plan was to stay in New York for a couple of days then head off to West Coast, but as fate would have it I found a cheaper ticket taking me to LA first, so being a little short on cash I thought I'd be smart. The catch with my cheaper ticket was my connecting flight to LA would be about 10 hours after I arrived. I thought 'yeah, I can brave that. I'll have my book and a few magazines...that should keep me entertained'. I'd slept for most of the journey to New York, so I wasn't even a tad sleepy, which made my wait even more excrutiating.
5 hours later I had read through all my magazines back to front, finished about a dozen cross word puzzles, and realised that I had bought the most pathetic book of the decade. JFK is a big airport, so I decided to do a little exploring to kill some time. I worked my way from one end of the airport right to the other, and to tell you the truth was getting really bored, and cold. Silly me, forgot that although LA would be nice and sunny, it was still winter in New York. All my winter stuff had been checked in, and all I was wearing was a sleeveless t-shirt and a pair of jeans...I wasn't cold I was freezing my arse off. I swear it must have been at least minus 20 out there, and so with the heating maybe 5 degrees on the inside (so, I'm exaggerating, but it was cold nonetheless).
Frozen stiff, the next best thing to a nice warm jumper was a nice hot cup of tea. I made my way quickly to one of the bar's and bought a sandwich, some crisps and a cup of tea. Wanting to get away from all the noise in the central lounge I took my food and tried to find a secluded corner for me to warm up in. With a bag of crisps (chips to Americans) in one hand, a cup of tea in the other, my carry bag slung over my shoulder, and my sandwich balanced on the forearm, I wasn't exactly paying attention to where I was walking, rather trying to keep everything from falling. The tea was so hot I was walking abnormally fast so I could put it down. I had just about made it when I felt a knock against my shoulder. It was hard, but in my haste and with my poor balance it was just enough to send everything I had crashing down, including me.
I felt like a right twat, me on my arse, clutching to a sandwich with tea and crisps (an open bag I might add) all over me.
"Bloody hell." I mumbled under my breath.
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry." I heard.
I pushed myself up, but with all the tea on the floor, I slipped again, and the last thing I heard was.....
"Oh shit!!"
My head was aching. I opened my eyes and saw two people staring down at me. Things were foggy, but after all the horror stories I had heard about foreign travellers I got kinda of a shock and jumped out and was ready to run. I rolled off what seemed like a sofa, but the moment I stood up my knees buckled and I lost balance. I felt a hand grab me and hold me up.
"Take it easy man."
I recognised the voice, it was the same one that had knocked me, and the last thing I heard.
"I'm alright, I'm alright." I said
"That was quite a nasty fall you had there, I think you should sit down for a bit until the doctor gets here."
I looked up at the voice, and was about to say something when I realised who I was looking at. It was Brian from the Backstreet boys, or at least it looked alot like him. I thought maybe it must have been from the fall, and rubbed my eyes......and he was still there!
Now, I'm not a big BSB fan, I'm more into indie and alternative stuff, but I must admit that some of their songs did take my fancy, and so did he. Definetelt the best looking of the five, and though I'd never admit it to anyone I did sometimes fantasise about him.
Not wanting to sound lame and star struck, I tried to compose myself.
"No seriously I'm fine. What happened though? and where am I?"
Then it hit me, I didn't have my bag, so I started to look frantically around for my bag.
My Brian look-a-like seemed to notice my concern and putting his hand on my shoulder he smiled said,
"If you're looking for your bag, it's on the table."
His smile practically lit up his face and I was then certain it was Brian, but it couldn't be. What would he be doing with me?
"Thanks." I mumbled
"I'm really sorry for what happened, and don't worry, the doctor should be here soon." he said
"What happened, and how did I get here...wherever here is." I said.
"You don't remember? Obviously not." Brian smiled again, and I could see a hint of embarrassment in his eyes and body language.
"Well...how do I put this....We bumped into each other, you fell, got up, fell again, hit your head against the side of a bin, and you were knocked out. Me and the guys brought you to our lounge, and you've only just come around." he said with a bemused look on his face.
Looking around he continued,
"Security said that the doctor would be held up a little cause of some emergency. Are you sure you're alright?"
His concern seemed very genuine, and I was actually rather amused. He looked so cute when his forhead got all wrinkled up.
"I'm fine. I really am. My head feels a little heavy, but no permanent damage done. You could just cancel the doctor." I said rather convincingly.
"You're accent...is it Irish?" Brian asked.
"Well, you are very observant. Yup, I'm from Belfast." I replied.
"Cool....oh where's my manners. I'm Brian by the way." he said.
'Oh my god, it is him' I thought to myself.
Up to that moment I was sure it was just a look a like, but how many Brian's could look like that?
"I'm Josh."
We shook hands. I could feel a surge of electricity coming from his hand. Our hand shake seemed to last an eternity. Was it my imaginaiton or were we both lingering a tad longer than normal. We broke our hand shake when I heard,
"Bri! Is everything okay over there?"
"Yea Kev, he's alright. I think we can cancel the doctor."
He looked at me trying to elicit my approval. I nodded.
"Cool. Do you want anything to eat or drink? Me and Nick are going to get some food?" Kevin asked
Brian looked at me and asked "Do you want anything?"
"No...I'm fi...actually I could really use some water." I said.
Brian sorted things out with Kevin, and we both sat down.
"So, where're you headed?" he asked
"L.A. Decided to check out the warmer side of America first. Haven't had a good break in ages!" I said.
Talking about the weather, I started to feel cold again, and began rubbing my shoulders.
"You must be freezing. Let me get you something warm."
He lept off the seat before I could say anything. His concern for a complete stranger was overwhelming, everything he said or did appeared so genuine.
He came back with a jacket. He walked to my right and sliped the jacket on to my shoulders, then slipped down next to me slinging his arm around my shoulder.
"So Josh, are you here alone or..."
I cut him off and said, "Yeah, I just graduated and decided rather than start work immediately, I thought I'd take a year out to find myself and do a bit of exploring. Never been to America so felt that this was the best place to start!"
"Very cool! How long are you going to be in the states? Are you just planning on going to LA or maybe tour around the country?"
"Don't really know yet. Thought I'd just play it by ear. I'd managed to earn enough to keep afloat for a while and also I was hoping to maybe find some odd bits of work. Worse come to worse, I either go home or swallow my pride and ask my parents for some help. Haven't really thought that far ahead yet."
"I don't know if I could ever be that spontaneous! So... just graduated? What in?"
"I did my first degree in French and Spanish, and just finished my masters in Management."
"So.." he said in a grin ",,you're one of those brainy people. How old are you? I thought initially in the ball park of 18-19, 20 tops!"
I started laughing. "18,19!! Well, You're not that far off. I'm 22. Look who's talking anyway. You don't look day over 18 yourself, but.."
"But what!!!" said Brian with a look of mock anger.
I had only been talking to him for a few minutes, but I felt so at ease. I usually get the impression that celebreties are a bit uppity and pretentious, but Brian was different. He was funny, kind, considerate...this time I was definetelt letting my imagination run wild.
I was silent for a while, and had a perplexed look on my face.
"I'm sorry if I sounded angry, I was just kidding," said Brian with a worried look.
"Oh god, did I just zone out?" I said shaking my head. "You'll have to forgive me sometimes my mind just wanders when..." I paused.
Brian waited for a while then asked "When what?"
"Well...when I'm taken off guard." I stated. "I mean this whole day has been a little surreal. I mean first, I'm actually here in America, and now I'm talking to you, Brian from the Backstreet Boys."
He let out a little giggle then said "I'm sorry man. I should have mentioned something earlier, but you didn't seem to fazed with me, I thought maybe we could have a decent talk without the whole BSB thing dominating the conversation." He looked down almost as in shame.
"Well, I can't say I'm not a wee bit star struck, but with all the confusion and just talking to you, for a moment there the whole fame thing did slip my mind."
Brian lifted his head and smiled. Taking my hand he said "Thanks,"
Not that I had minded what he'd done, but it did take me by surprise, and I pulled back.
We both simultaneously said "I'm sorry!", then broke out laughing.
Kevin and Nick walked in right then with puzzled looks on their faces.
"Right, what's so funny?" asked Nick, consciously looking down at himself thinking we were laughing at him.
"Guys..." Brian stood up saying, "I'd like you to meet Josh from Belfast. He's decided to do a little tour of the good ol' USA, starting with sunny California," he continued mimicking a newscaster (for those from the UK, think Graham from Blind Date)
I was breifly introduced to Nick and Kevin, and we chatted a little going over the basics...where I'm from, what I'm doing, my plans, nothing deep. I guess they sensed that I was wondering where AJ and Howie were so without my asking Kevin said, "and if you're wondering, AJ and Howie are in LA, we're meeting them there."
We continued to chat a little more about superficial stuff, films, sport, then we inevitably reached music.
"So, what sort of music are you into?" queried Nick.
"Well, I listen to alot of Indie stuff like Streophonics, Coldplay, love the Chillies, and I have to admit do take in quite a bit of chart stuff," I replied
"I have to ask, since you're one of the few non screaming, non fainting people we've met recently, what did you think about our last album?" this time Kevin asked.
"What makes you think I've heard you last album?" I said a bit sarcastically, with a little grin on my face.
The look on Kevin's face was priceless when I said that. He turned bright red, and mumbled, "I...I...ummm,"
Brian and Nick broke out into hysterics and Nick literally fell on the floor.
I felt bad so I said "I didn't mean that.."
"No, no..I had no right to assume.." Kevin interjected.
"No, I was a bit out of line there, but having phrased it the way you did, it was begging for it!!" I laughed. "Truth is, I haven't heard the album yet apart from Shape of My Heart, and I have to admit it is on my play list. I'm going to be blunt here, the first time I heard you guys, I was convinced you wouldn't make it, but after a few more listens, I have been pretty hooked on most of your songs. You guys are brilliant with harmonies, love your acapella stuff."
This caused all three of them to blush, with Kevin's face turning another shade of red. Having realised what I had just said, I started staring at my shoes.
Brian broke the silence by grabbing me around the neck saying "Well, I'm glad you like our music, we can never have enough fans!"
This started up the laughing again.
I don't know how long I had been with them, but it suddenly dawned on me that I may have missed my flight. I glanced at my watch, it said 8.20pm, my flight was at 8.30pm.
"Shit!!" I yelled.
In unison they all looked at me and asked "What's wrong?"
"I gotta go." I said standing up.
"I am so unbelievably late. I've got 10 minutes to get to the plane," I looked at my watch, "9 minutes actually."
"I'm sorry guys but I gotta go," I looked at Brian saying this, and I swear I noticed a change in his eyes.
Brian was silent while I scampered around trying to get my things together. Then he started writing something down.
I was about to say my goodbyes when he handed a piece of paper.
"Here's my email address and number, since we'll both be in LA, we should meet up sometime. I..we could show you round town." Brian said with a look of sadness in his eyes, quickly turning to a smile.
Was he sad to see me go? He couldn't be. Who was I to him? Then again, I not too bad myself, and have had my fair share of compliments.
I'm about 5'8", 11 stone, which is about 150 lbs ( I think), blond hair, green eyes (exotic I know!!), and quite a toned body. I work out 3 times a week, swim, play tennis and footy (soccer), and I kick box, so I'm in good shape. Anyways, back to the story...
I took it, gave Nick and Kevin a hug, and finally Brian. I moved in to hug him when he grabbed me tight, and whispered "Take care,"
"You too. I'll call only if you promise to call me back," I joked.
He looked at me rather seriously, "You promise?" he said with concern in his voice.
"I promise," I whispered back. "Now I have to go otherwise they're going to leave without me!" I then dashed out trying to make my way to the gate. Midway, I realised I still had his jacket. I was in a bit of a fix, do I make my flight, OR give him back his jacket? I had to do the honourable thing and return his jacket to him. I had obviously missed my flight so I made my way back to the lounge.
I must have missed all the security around the area when I left, but when I got closer there must have been at least 5 to 6 guards at the door. I approached to main entrance and was immediately told to back off, talk about being very unhospitable.
I tried to explain that I had Brian's jacket and that I was in there before, but it fell to deaf ears - they'd probably heard every possible excuse from fans trying to get in. I decided not to push it lest being escorted away, so I took the jacket off and told one of the guards to give it back to him. Just as I was about to give it to him all five of them came walking out. The look of shock on Brian's face was priceless, and very heartwarming too!
"Josh!! What are you doing here? You're flight?" I could see his confusion, concern, but on top of that there was a little smile which I was hoped was for me.
"I forgot about your jacket," I said sheepishly.
Brian laughed and said, "You missed your flight for that, aww you could have kept it. Actually keep it. It looks good on you. Think of it as a momento." then giving me a good once over.
How could I say no? It was an amazing deep brown leather jacket, which probably costed a bomb. But ethical me responded,
"I can't, it yours and..."
He cut me off and said, "Don't be silly. Just keep it. But forget that. What are you going to do now?"
I looked at everyone else and realised that they were waiting for him. I felt bad so I said,
"Nevermind me. You seem in a rush so you better get going."
"Let them wait, we've waited this long what is another few minutes? So tell me"
His put his arm around my shoulder, motioned for the rest to start walking, and started walking with me.
"Just buy another ticket I suppose. I'd had planned on staying here in New York, but since my luggage is on the way to LA now, I don't have much of a choice!" I laughed.
"I've got a better idea. It's my fault you've missed your flight the least I can do is take you along with us. Besides we are going to the same place."
"I couldn't possibly...I'd be imposing..." I was stuttering. This was too good to be true.
"Nonsense," he said. "Nick, Kev, get over here."
"It's my fault Josh missed his flight, so what do you say if I make it up to him by giving him a lift?"
"Sure why not. It'll be good to talk to someone other than Kev and Brian, them being so moody and all." said Nick.
"Moody....... me?" screamed Kevin, punching Nick on the shoulder.
"I don't see why not, this way I'll get to talk to someone who doesn't have the maturity of a 10 year old!" said Kevin.
"Right, then it's settled." said Brian.
"But what about my luggage?" I asked.
"Don't worry, we'll deal with that, just give me your flight details and baggage tags." said Kevin.
I'd read about Kevin being the responsible one and sort of in charge, and it was definetely showing now. He walked over to what seemed like management, and after what seemed like a mild quarrel, he motioned for us to go over.
"Is this going to be a problem? I really don't want to be causing any problems here. I'm fine with getting another flight...I"," I was stammering again - always happens when I'm nervous, I asked Brian.
"Relax. Management's always trying to make things difficult, but Kev will sort it out, and if he doesn't I will." said Brian smiling at me.
Brian was being overly nice to me, and I was truly confused, but my nan always said that never question a good thing, so I decided to go with the flow.
We were led to a departure lounge and told to board. The moment I got on I was gobsmacked. It wasn't a commercial airliner we we're flying, no it was their private Jet.
Seeing my obviously awe stricken face, Nick grabbed my hand, "Let me give you the grand tour!"
I turned to look at Brian and saw him scowl at Nick, who just sniggered back.
"Guys, tour later, we need to take off so, buckle up." ordered Kevin.
Nick and me walked back to the front of the plane. Brian motioned for me to sit next to him, so I did. I looked at Nick, who started giggling again.
I've always hated flying, and this time was no exception. After fastening my seatbelt, I grabbed the rest as I felt the plane start moving. Brian noticed my tenseness and just held my hand then said "I take it you're not too keen on flying,"
"You can tell," I replied.
"Just relax, take deep breaths, and close your eyes if you need." he whispered.
I was still tense, and now beads of sweat started to trickle down my forehead.
Suddenly Brian started singing softly 'Shape of My Heart'. The sound of his voice was so calming that almost immediately I felt myself relaxing. Hearing Brian singing, Kevin turned back to look at him. Brian immediately removed his hand from mine and pretended to dig through the seat's front pocket. Kevin looked oddly at Brian then sat back down. But all through this he didn't stop singing. He looked at me and just smiled.
To be continued.......
OKay, so nothing much has happened. I'm trying to develop their relationship before making anything happen. You know, a bit of romance. Please email me with any comments or ideas. I'd love to hear what you have to say, good or bad, like if you think it's really crap and I shouldn't continue just say so. So please email me at josh_wills@excite.com(bit of an email junky here!).