Thugs with Tendencies

Thugs with Tendencies 6

TWT6- Mike "Meech" Buchanan

My block is deception. My block is robbing the Chinese guy when you order Chinese food one too many times. There's not too many deliveries after that. No late night cravings on my block. You're out of luck. On my block people pay for shit they can't afford with credit card scams. You are lucky to do anything constructive on my block and if you do something constructive you better be careful. Because the successful are the first ones who get robbed.

That's just how shit is.

I'm lying on a bed with sexy ass Lopez. He was a thug. He was a gangster from my block. Lopez is completely naked. Fine isn't even the word for it. He was fine as all fuck! I'm talking about deep cuts in his muscles and tattoos. He licks his lips after every few words just so they sparkle. He has a deep, seductive voice that sounds like he is narrating a sex book. Every once in a while his Spanish accent will come out and outline the words that he's saying. Right now the words that he's saying is really turning me on. He was telling me that he wanted to go on a date with me. I should be happy. I should be smiling. I should be doing back flips. But I choke.

I choke.

And I spit.

"I'm HIV+" I tell him.

It's the first thing that rolls off of my tongue.

"You're what?"

Lopez has Sweat is rolling down his forehead. He just sits there on the bed looking like I just punched him square in the fucking face. He looks over at me as though I said something that really fucking hurt his feelings or something.

"HIV+..." I tell him again.

"Damn..."

"I understand if you aren't interested anymore. I understand if you aren't..."

He just shakes his head at that moment, "Damn man. You're young as fuck. How the fuck could something like this have happened to you?"

"I was raped by someone..."

He is breathing heavy.

"Who?"

There is a look in Lopez's eyes. I had assumed the guy found me attractive. I'd heard he'd been asking around the neighborhood about me. Most DL guys knew what that kind of thing meant. I thought Lopez really wanted to fuck me. The way he is looking at me right now though is a little different. Right now he is looking at me like he's ready to defend me somehow. He's ready to do anything to hurt the person who did this to me.

I have to admit, it's fucking endearing really. It's fucking cute that he is doing this. I have to admit that I actually fucking like it.

I shrug, "It's not important is it?"

"Who did this to you?" he asks me, "You don't leave the block. It has to be someone on this block. I want to know who fucking raped you yo."

Lopez has this passion in his eyes that I have to admit is kind of sexy. A part of me is really thinking he cares. Instead of letting him in though I just shake my head and smile. I smile weakly.

"Can you take me home?"

Tears are coming out of my eyes. I strain them out and try to block them before Lopez can see. Lopez looks over at me at that moment. He doesn't know how to react. I can tell he isn't used to seeing a grown man cry. Maybe that's why he just stands there with this cold blank stare.

"Ok. I'll take you home."
~
The week goes by fast after being with Lopez. I don't see Lopez for a while. He doesn't have my number but it would take nothing for him to reach out to Yusef or even Ty to get my number if he really wanted it. I guess he wasn't as interested as I thought he was. I guess the whole HIV thing turned him completely off to me. I do get a knock on the door two days later. It's someone who I'm not expecting to show up at my door. The person who shows up at my door is none other than Sterling.

"Hey..."

I roll my eyes when I see Sterling. The guy has been coming over damn near every other day since the massacre. I don't get it honestly. I don't get why he's here.

"I'm not really in the mood bro," I tell Sterling.

Sterling shakes his head, "I just came over to check on you and Kenyatta. I promised your sister Chey that I'd look out for you."

He was dead serious. This boy had on a fucking polo sweater, some khaki pants that were pressed evenly, blonde hair, gray eyes and a smile that made me think he just shot a pilot for some Hollywood movie. Ain't it funny how that shit works.

"With all due respect. We are good. Kenyatta doesn't need your help. I don't need your help. I know you were going to get married to my sister but you aren't married to my sister. Even if she were alive you guys probably wouldn't have gotten married."

"You still blame me for telling her the truth."

He was so fucking nice. The idea of him being so sweet was endearing to me. I had to admit that it was kind of sweet. If I hadn't sucked his dick, I probably would have liked him for Cheyenne. I probably would have liked the idea of my sister getting with this suburban white boy. It made me feel good that she wasn't dating some random thug who was going to get her pregnant and leave as soon as another girl with a big ass came along.

The fact is though; I did suck Sterling's dick. Cheyenne was also dead. The whole fairytale was dead. There weren't fairytales on my block. You couldn't read fairytales when there were gunshots outside of your windows every night.

"It doesn't matter now. Nothing matters now. In case you haven't noticed. Why don't you go back to Idaho or Wisconsin or wherever the fuck you from man?"

I hate to break the news to him. Sterling lost his wife and his unborn baby. I'd seen him cry about it. He'd come over and sat with Kenyatta and I. Kenyatta and I didn't know how to respond to this guy. We just stared at him. He cried differently from us. He spoke differently from us. Even in mourning I couldn't find much in common with a guy like Sterling.

"The killer is still out there," Sterling tells me, "I'm not leaving you out here like this. The cops didn't even look into this. They don't care. I'm not going to just abandon Cheyenne's little brother. She loved you man. And if she loved you then I---"

"Don't say it," I cut him off, "I don't need your help."

"Then I'll stay for Kenyatta."

"Kenyatta's cool. She's at this pool party. Matter of fact I'm headed over there in a minute," I tell him, "Bout to find a nice bathing suit and get out of here. So thanks Sterling...but no thanks."
"I can take you."

I raise my eyebrow at Sterling.

"Sterling. What's your last name?"

"Huckabee."

"Listen. I ain't trying to be racist. But ain't no nigga or white boy named Huckabee ever went to a pool party on my block before. That shit doesn't happen man. You'll stand out like a sore fucking thumb if you do that shit."

"I'm going to the party."

"Bye Sterling."

"Mike..."

"See. That's your fucking problem," I tell Sterling, "My name isn't Mike. My name is fucking Meech. You can't even get nicknames right Sterling. You don't belong here."

I slam the door in his face at that moment. I feel like I should be nicer to Sterling but there's no love lost out here. Shit was about to get ugly on my block and Sterling probably couldn't deal with it. Sterling wasn't built for what was about to go down on my block. He had no idea what was going to go down and maybe that was for the best. Maybe that was what was needed.

Yusef comes over to take me to the pool party. My cousin is wearing no shirt and some swimming trunks. He's slimmer than I am and I always was kind of jealous of the fact that he was a little taller than me. When he comes to pick me up in his broke down car I almost get embarrassed at the fact that we pull up to the party in this thing.

"Can't your man buy you something nicer?" I ask Yusef.

Yusef shakes his head, "Don't worry about what Ty is going to get me. Ty is going to give me the world. You hear me? He promised me that shit. He's going to give me everything. Right now shit is just tough with these Bakersfield bitches running around."

"If Ty is giving you everything why doesn't he give you the answers to what happened to my family?" I ask.

Things get quiet.

We pull up to the party. There is a drunk ass girl who runs across our hood. She's being chased by a couple boys who are trying to grab her and throw her in the pool I think. A couple of other boys are on the side smoking marijuana on the porch. At the end of the block some crackheads are shooting up. A bunch of thug guys are headed to the back of the party where the pool is. I notice one of them is DJ. He has a bottle in his hand. He waves over at me from the car. I nod back at DJ, but I realize Yusef doesn't wave at him.

Yusef has something on his mind clearly and it's clear that he wants to tell me about it by the look on his face. He looks at me hard at that moment.

"I have something to tell you little cousin..." Yusef tells me.

I look my cousin up and down. He looks worried. He's actually shaking a little bit when he says it. What could possibly have Yusef so nervous?

"Spit it out. Shit. We don't have all day. I'm trying to get me a hot dog and shit."

"I know who did the shooting."

I raise an eyebrow.

"Do you?"

"Yeah."

"Who was it?"

He pauses for a few minutes.

"Red," Yusef tells me.

"Are you sure about that?" I ask Yusef, "Red dated Kenyatta. You know that right?"

"He admitted it. He admitted it right before Ty killed him," Yusef explains.

Red used to come to my house for dinner every other Sunday. He used to kiss my mom on the cheek after she cooked a meal for him. He was telling my ratchet ass sister Kenyatta that she was the love of his fucking life. Yusef was talking about that Red? Really? I raise my eyebrow wondering if he expects me to believe this.

"Is that what happened?" I ask him.

Yusef raises his hands, "Swear to God."

He's shaking when he raises his hand.

"Well damn man," I reply shaking my head, "I guess I owe Ty man. He's really looking out. I mean...wow...he found the killer of my family in no time. I'll have to talk to Kenyatta about this. I'll have to see where her head is at."

"Wait...maybe that's not a good idea," Yusef explains, "Not yet at least. Let's keep this between us...for now. Kenyatta's been really upset lately. So have you. I think it was important that I tell you though. I just wanted to know that I always got your back. Once Ty starts running these streets I'll be his King, cous. And you know what. Me and you. We are family. Whatever I get. You get too. No one is going to fuck with us. No one. You hear me?"

Yusef has all this emotion in his voice as he's talking to me. I know why. We've been through everything together. We've been through it all. At the end of the day we were Buchanan's and for some reason I knew that meant the most to him.

I nod at that moment, "I hear you, cous."

Yusef leans over and hugs me. He squeezes me tight for a few seconds, before awkwardly pulling away, "Ok, let's stop that gay shit. I got to hurry up and get my party on before my baby mama shows up to this shit and ruins everything for me."

I laugh at that moment and follow Yusef out of the car.

The party is pretty crowded when we pull up. Everything seems to be happening at once for some reason. There are more people than I actually feel comfortable with. I'm not really one of those guys that loves being out and about. Yusef was more the party animal. He reluctantly dragged me out to these places. Truthfully I felt like I needed to be home but he said it wasn't healthy for me to just be stuck in the house mourning. He said that was going to just lead to depression.

He was probably right.

I had to be out there.

"There goes your boy Ty..." I state.

"He's standing with Lopez..." Yusef notices.

Lopez was standing on the other side of the pool. He had his shirt off. He had on jean shorts and a chain that dangled over his chest. He had a Budweiser in his hand. There was this girl who was all over him. She was really pretty too actually. She had long hair and a big butt. I would have sworn that Lopez would have all of his attention on her but that isn't exactly the case. Lopez is staring at me instead the entire time.

His eyes sink on me. They thrust towards me with this strong delicacy that I don't understand. It's as though he's trying to caress me and push me at the same time. I don't know which direction he's pushing me in so I just stand there and stare back at him...confused.

"We should go say wassup," I state.

"Not a good idea," Yusef responds.

"Why not?"

Yusef leans in at that moment, "We had this discussion. Don't you remember. I told you that boy...likes you."

"That's not a problem is it? I mean you're with Ty. I can get with Lopez. We'd be around each other all the time."

Yusef's face doesn't seem to think this is amusing at all. In fact, he looks really annoyed by even the suggestion of that. I don't get it. I don't understand why his face gets so sour like he just tasted something disgusting in his mouth or something. Yusef grimaces. He STRAIGHT up grimaces at that moment like I am feeding him poison.

"Are you for real? Lopez ain't shit!" he starts off loudly before lowering to a firm whisper, "He ain't shit. You hear me. You ever ask him about his son that he abandoned? Why don't you ask him that? Why don't you ask him how his son died? He ain't shit. All he does is fuck girls and plays them. He's a playboy. You want to date that? I know Lopez. I know he isn't shit..."

"What about Lopez?" a voice asks.

My sister Kenyatta interrupts us. She puts a shoulder on my cousin's shoulder and then another one on mine. Kenyatta hands me her beer. I shake my head. The bitch can be annoying but every once in a while her nosiness was a good fucking thing.

"Nothing," Yusef says to my sister.

"You were just mentioning sexy Lopez," my sister says.

"Does this bitch ever mind her fucking business?" Yusef asks me right in front of my sister as though my sister isn't standing right there.

"She sure doesn't."

"I sure don't," Kenyatta stated, "You know what's weird? I got a text from Lopez. I hadn't heard from him in years. I don't even know how he got my number. He had to go through a lot to get it. And you know what's even weirder. He asked about Meech."

"He asked about me?" I ask.

"Just how you are doing," Kenyatta states.

Interesting.

"That's gay as fuck," Yusef adds in out of nowhere.

Maybe Yusef is trying to hide the fact that it is indeed gay that Lopez is going around asking people about me. The fact that he is asking my sister about it is making it kind of suspicious. I have to admit. Even people who weren't in the life would be suspicious of it.

My sister puts on a brazen smile at that moment. It's a smile that I haven't seen from her in such a long time. She slowly pushes away from me and just stands there going towards the pool.

"You shouldn't knock it Yusef. Things are changing..." Kenyatta states, "I don't think it's such a bad idea..."

With that Kenyatta dives in the pool.

She dives in with a hard splash at that moment. A couple of girls roll their eyes at her from the splash. She even gets a lot on Yusef. Yusef shakes the water off and looks over at me. I can tell that he's beyond pissed at that moment. More than being pissed he seems confused by what Kenyatta just said to me.

Yusef gives me a hard stare, "Yo. Did Kenyatta just..."

"I told her."

"What?"

"This isn't the first time Lopez has been reaching out. She thought it was weird. So I admitted to her that I was gay a few nights ago," I tell my cousin Yusef.

Yusef's face goes pale.

"She's friends with my girl...."

"Relax. I didn't tell her about you," I explain to Yusef, "And I promise you that my sister won't say anything."

"Meech. This is big. You can't just admit something like that. What the fuck is wrong with you Meech? What the fuck?"

Yusef is going a little crazy. The idea that I told my sister a few days ago about me for some reason is causing him to panic. I get it. His baby's mother Nene was a crazy ass bitch and there was no telling what she would do if she found out that he was really gay. That wasn't my problem however. Maybe if he stopped fucking her and Ty at the same time then he wouldn't have those problems. I just turn away from him though. I realize that I'm not going to get through to Yusef.

Yusef continues to try to pummel into me with these questions but I'm noticing someone walking into the pool party. My mouth drops open when I see the person. It's Sterling. I roll my eyes in shock when I see Sterling at that moment.

"Nene is here," Yusef is saying still whining, "Your sister better not say shit about any gay shit. I swear to God, Meech."

"Go talk to your baby's mother. I'll be right back."

I head away from Yusef at that moment. I didn't want to be around Nene anyway. I was shocked at Sterling showing up at that moment. The dude doesn't even look like himself. Sterling has on some jeans that are sagged down a little bit. He has the newest Yes Boosts on his feet. His shirt is one of those extra long tees that go down to his knees and his jeans are little skinny jeans with rips in them. He has on a gold chain. He has on a snapback hat that is tilted backwards. He walks in with some type of gangster strut and I almost want to laugh when I see this. This dude had blonde hair and gray eyes and he's what? Some kind of gangster or something.

"What's good?" Sterling asks me.

"Is this some sort of joke?" I ask him, "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I got an invite from Kenyatta," Sterling states.

I don't put it past my sister. Now why would my sister want Sterling here. I knew my sister. She was up to something. Still...Sterling being here was amusing to say to the least. He makes his way towards me and stands there for a few seconds.

"Did you invest in Cash Money Entertainment or something?" I ask, "What's up with the swag?"

"I'm not a complete square," he tells me.

I roll my eyes, "Sterling yes the hell you are."

"What you don't realize is that everyone has different sides to them. I can do the suburban kid. I can do the business guy. I can also do the guy on the block who just likes to chill."

"The only thing you've ever chilled is probably your Starbucks Iced coffee," I tell Sterling.

Sterling laughs at that moment. I have to admit maybe not everyone seemed to think he looked crazy. Hell some of the girls are even checking Sterling out with him acting like this. Still. I know the difference. I know how Sterling really is. Sterling is the definition of a square. I don't know how he came up with this look. Maybe he fucking googled "gangster" for all I know. I have no idea. All I know is that this isn't the kind of place that he needs to be.

He shrugs, "Relax. I came to help. Talk to me. Which one of these guys do you think had something to do with the shooting?"

He looks around at that moment.

"Sterling. What would you do if you knew?"

Sterling doesn't seem to be amused by my question, "What do you mean? The person killed my fiancée. They killed my unborn baby. Do you think you're the only one that suffered that day Mike? They took everything from me man. So yeah. I'm not going to let these so called gangsters or whatever get away with it."

For a moment I want to believe Sterling. For a moment I see his heart in it. We all lost big that day. I'd spent so long crying to myself about it. I felt so long wondering what I could have done differently besides storming out of the house that day. Maybe Sterling saved my life that day. If he hadn't told my sister about me I would have stayed in the house. I would have been killed.

Saving my life isn't good enough. I should have been there. I should have been there to defend my family or die with them.

I blame myself.

"I didn't ask you what you lost Sterling," I tell him, "I asked you what you were going to do."

"I'm going to get them arrested."

Just what I thought. It wasn't good enough. Death is the only thing that can make up for death. He didn't understand that. I didn't want anyone arrested. My block didn't depend on courts. My block was corrupt cops. My block was crooked politicians. My block had a street code. An eye for an eye. Snitches get stitches.

No.

I had other plans.

I shake my head at Sterling, "Get out of here man."

"What?" Sterling asks, "I came to help."

"I said get the fuck out of here."

"No."

I look at Sterling hard. I want to punch him at that moment. He's being so fucking difficult right now. He had no idea how pissed I was. Even bringing up my family has caused me to get so fucking emotional. Sterling was a reminder of that loss. Him telling me he would help get them arrested wasn't exactly the kind of revenge I was looking for.

"Sterling...listen. I get you want to help. I really do. I lost myself that day. You're a good person. I can see it. I think Cheyenne saw it too. The thing that I'm becoming...is bad. On my block you have to be tough to survive. And sometimes tough isn't always a good thing."

"That doesn't make you a bad guy. I don't think you're a bad guy man..."

I don't know why Sterling reaches over. I swear I don't get him. The dude reaches over in PUBLIC, in the middle of the FUCKING DAY and he hugs me! He hugs me in front of all of these fucking people. At first I'm just shocked by it. My mouth just drops open. It isn't like one of the block hugs where you shake someone's hand and give him a light tap on their back. No. This was a REAL hug. Nothing was separating us.

At that moment it seemed as though time itself fucking stopped. We were rubbed up against one another. Our bodies were pressed up against one another. He holds me for such a long time that I think I'm in the Twilight zone. This can't be happening right now.

I notice people staring at me. So many people are shocked at Sterling's sudden show of affection that came out of left field. Nene and Yusef are staring at me. Yusef looks like he wants to damn near punch me in my goddam face for hugging Sterling like this. I didn't want this! I didn't want to be comforted like this.

"GET THE FUCK OFF ME!" I say.

"Yo what's the problem---" he starts.

"He said fall back yo," we are interrupted by someone else. I turn and realize the person who has interrupted us is Lopez.

I have no idea how Lopez made it from the other side of the party where Ty is to where I am right now so quickly. He is over there quick as hell and he has this aggressive look on his face. He looks like he wants to punch Sterling right now and I have no doubt that he is willing to do that if given the opportunity. I'm shocked and a little turned on that Lopez came to my defense.

"I wasn't talking to you," Sterling checks him.

I'm a little shocked to be honest. Sterling wasn't exactly the toughest guy and Lopez was definitely one of the most intimidating gangsters I'd ever seen. Sterling talking to him like that comes out of left field. As if he's nothing Sterling turns his back on Lopez. I watch the bottle in Lopez's hand. He raises it. I'm so sure he's about to crack Sterling in the back of the head.

I quickly grab Lopez.

"Hey let's go get some more beers man," I tell Lopez.

I pull Lopez away. Sterling has a hurt look when I walk away. Truthfully Sterling should be thanking me right now. He should be fucking happy. He should be overjoyed actually that I saved him from ending up in the hospital or even worse if this thing escalated.

I take Lopez away from everyone else and calm him down. I get him a beer and sit him down on a veranda in the back away from everyone else.

He opens the beer and drinks it.

"What was that about?" I ask him.

There is silence for a minute.

"I told you. I like you. I'm not going to let someone disrespect you in front of me," Lopez explains.

That comes more of a shocker to me than anything.

"Lopez I told you that I had HIV."

Lopez shrugs.

"I don't give a fuck man. You're cool as fuck. You're sexy as fuck. I'm not going to lose out over some bullshit because of some disease that I can protect myself against. As much fucking around as I do, I could get it at any time. God knows it's a miracle I don't have it now."

I sigh deeply, "So you don't care."

"I don't care," he confirms.

I take a seat next to Lopez. He's staring at me. He's watching my expression. The heat is coming over us. He isn't squinting due to the heat though. He is squinting down at me with this overwhelming idea of understanding my reaction right now.

I lean back, "You can have any man you want. My sister says you've been asking about me...still..."

He nods.

"I have. I was kind of pushy. I know it probably sounded gay as fuck. I don't care. For some reason I'm realizing I don't care how I look with you. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. Truth is I don't care if it is a good thing or a bad thing. I just can't get you off my mind kid. What you think about that?"

I shrug.

"Don't know."

"Why don't you know? Figure it out. Stop looking away. Look over at me. How about we go on one date? How's that sound?"

I shrug, "Tired of men hurting me."

"You talking about the HIV?"

I look over at him, "Yeah."

He gives me a hard look, "You said someone...raped you. I know I just met you man, but shit like that...it's not cool with me. If you were mine, I'd kill someone who did that to you. Matter of fact you should let me prove to you how much I want to get to know to you bro. I'm not no bitch. If you were mine, you wouldn't have to worry about anything."

Same shit Ty told Yusef.

I sigh a little bit.

"You wouldn't want to know who it was. If you knew you wouldn't be talking like this," I explain to him, "If you knew who raped me. If you knew who gave me HIV."

"Who?"

I give him a hard look, "Ty."

Lopez goes cold at that moment. A part of me is kind of shocked when I see him like that. I don't expect it. I mean I expected a reaction. I expected something to happen but I didn't expect the deep hatred that builds up in Lopez's face right now.

"You should get out of here," Lopez tells me.

I watch as Lopez picks up his phone. He is dialing someone. I wonder who.

"What you going to do?"

"Get out of here. Some shit is about to go down," Lopez tells me.

Lopez walks away on the phone. I can see the expression on his face. It isn't a threat. Lopez looks like he is going to do something drastic right now to protect my honor. A part of me wants to stop him. A part me actually feels like maybe I shouldn't have told him what I told him. I don't stop him though. I just allow him to walk away.

I sit there alone thinking about what I just did. Was it a good idea? Lopez really seemed to have emotion. I wonder who he's talking to.

I don't wonder long though...

As Lopez walks away someone else sits down right next to me.

A smile spreads across the person's face.

"He fell for it?" the person asks me.

I nod, "I think you were right. Lopez is...in love with me."

"Good. That's what we wanted right?"

I shake my head, "I didn't think it was actually that serious. He barely knows me..."

"I know Lopez. He looks at you like I haven't seen him look at anyone. He talks about you like I haven't seen him talk about anyone. If anyone knows Lopez. I know Lopez. This is working out perfectly."

I am hesitating, "Then why do I feel like shit?"

"Don't you dare feel like shit. This is the plan. You better not catch feelings for Lopez. We need to use him."

"I lied to him. I told him I had HIV. That was a lie. He thinks his brother Ty raped me. That was a lie. All this to manipulate Lopez into wanting to turn against Ty? I think we may be going too far. This is about to start a fucking war. Lopez is about to make a call to someone. Some shit is about to go down."

The person leans back, takes in some fresh air and stares up at the sky.

"Lopez is calling the Bakersfield boys. I know he is. He's planning an attack against Ty. Red was onto the type of person Ty was. That's why Ty blamed the shooting on him. I know what he's up to and I'm going to make sure that he goes down. One way or another. We'll get our revenge. One way or another. Yusef isn't going to help. Yusef chose his side. We can't trust anyone. It's just me and you, Meech. Just me and you. Ty didn't get away with killing our family. He didn't. We will turn them all against each other. We'll make them kill one another."

I nod at that moment, reluctantly agreeing with my sister, "Ok Kenyatta. We'll stick to the plan."

To read the next chapter go to www.crushedcrown.com