To Thine Own Self Be True

This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man. Shakespeare (Hamlet)

Thanks to Chael for assistance proofing the story. This is wholly fictional with no reference intended to persons alive or dead.

From the previous chapter:

Zach looked to Alejandro as a friend and perhaps more. Their interactions, their sex, their compatibility promised hope that something might develop. If he honestly faced his intention and need, Zach realized in quiet moments of introspection that what he most deeply wanted was a lasting relationship with another man. He knew the church would frown on it, not to mention his family. He'd cross those bridges when the time came.

When he looked at Alejandro he felt a connection. No, he felt a longing both in his heart and a pressing sexual need to be with this man. He didn't know what their future would hold. He was almost afraid to hope that it might become a relationship but he was willing to take the chance.

Chapter 27

Alejandro's first visit to San Francisco representing the family had been nothing but routine. On subsequent visits, he and Charles had added the city to those places where they had purchased and furnished a condo.

Alejandro had done his homework on the members of the board. He was familiar with the Bertrand Fund contributions to the Museum among others. Their donations were significant in supporting the Fine Arts Museum, primarily the Legion of Honor. At previous meetings, the Bertrand Fund had been represented by a distinguished, portly, grey-haired gentleman who had the bearing of a lawyer. His participation was minimal, his vote was with the majority and rarely did he ask questions. Yet, he was treated with such deference that Alejandro's curiosity was piqued.

After Alejandro's return home, the staff lawyer, who'd initially set him on the `straight and narrow' regarding representing the family, did some quick research. Alejandro was moderately impressed by the additional information about the Bertrand Fund, as well as by the family history.

The Bertrand and Algara families supported similar kinds of institutions. Alejandro was impressed by the generational links that had helped shape California over the decades. He wistfully considered his own situation--the only heir to the Algara name. What could his family have accomplished if their influence had spanned more than a century?

Oh well,' he thought to himself. It was never a fruitful expenditure of time to dwell on the past. Grow and learn' had been his mantra in times like this. He shook off the lethargy of guilt that usually accompanied these infrequent moments of morbid introspection.

This momentary distraction about the Bertrand Fund was mentally filed. He added it to the bank of data he was building on his various and expanding associations across the country.

When time came for the next San Francisco trip, Alejandro was looking forward to exploring the clubs he and Charles had enjoyed during the previous visit, when they had inaugurated the condo. He felt himself swell pleasantly with the memory of that visit.

He marveled that his conservative demeanor could, on those occasions, fall away like an uncomfortable suit of clothes. He and Charles enjoyed the clubs and bars as they would a buffet of forbidden fruit.

They began their evening visiting some cowboy bars dressed in their `redneck' jeans, flannels and boots. They laughed as they returned to the condo to change into the leather ensembles they'd helped each other buy in anticipation of visiting the numerous biker bars found in the Tenderloin District.

Somehow they each fed into the fantasy of the other. Individually, neither Alejandro nor Charles would have been so bold, so blatant. As they finished pulling on the supple, gleaming, black leather, there was both laughter and lust in their eyes.

Both knew that by dawn they would both have sore asses and would awaken to crusty cum-stained sheets. They would both `top' tonight. No doubt, several times. It would be a pleasant exhaustion.

More than a few times that evening, Alejandro was glad he had someone watching his back. His appetite was such that he attracted leather-clad, muscled guys like bees to honey.

A man of average height, Alejandro often felt dwarfed. Sure, there were some guys under six feet; but the sheer bulk of muscle and the height of many of the men in the bars were a bit daunting to Alejandro. His well-formed, hairy chest, along with his bulging basket, caught the eye of many who thought he'd be easy pickings for a hot ride.

With Charles nearby, Alejandro enjoyed the attention, and could `push back' when the occasional predator seemed determined to claim him as his amusement for the evening. What both pleased and surprised him was the sense of camaraderie that he found with some of the guys who were willing to set aside their posturing for a moment and spend a few moments in conversation.

The memory of that night gave Alejandro a bulge in his briefs. His disappointment that Charles wouldn't be able to join him on this trip was reinforced as he considered what he'd likely end up doing - meeting, greeting, eating, sleeping and returning home all within twenty-four hours. Damn!

As he packed, he shook off his disappointment and temptation. He refused to pout or project his frustration onto Charles. It wasn't his fault.

Unsure of the extended neighborhood surrounding the condo, Alejandro decided to leave his running clothes at home, but instead grabbed his gym clothes and Speedo. There was a great men-only club he was planning to use. Who knew? Maybe he'd meet someone there who'd want to play a little. Pursing his lips, he just shook his head, knowing that indulging in that kind of fantasy was likely to increase his frustration.

At the last minute he grabbed his tux, remembering that there was a formal reception and cocktail hour after Friday's meeting. A new exhibition had been mounted and the `who's who' of San Francisco would be there. Onerous as it was, Alejandro knew it was his duty to be in attendance. Try as he would, he couldn't imagine how Isabella and Salvador had enjoyed this kind of thing.

They had developed circles of friends across the country. These obligations had been eagerly anticipated by the couple as an opportunity to renew acquaintances, catch up on news and gossip, as well as to make new friends. With Charles, he was beginning to get a sense of how it might be possible for a gay man to function in this social milieu.

Again he shook his head. Grabbing his gear and his briefcase, he headed for O'Hare. During the ride, he again found himself looking forward to the private charter. It made the travel so much easier.

The condo was a quiet haven after the trip. He found the housekeeping and catering service had done their usual outstanding job. He convinced the butler/cook assigned for his stay that he was perfectly able to fix a small dinner and turn down his own bed. After giving Alejandro a quick `tour' of the food in the fridge, the man agreed to return the next day to freshen up the condo.

Walking through the rooms of the 1,000 square foot condo, Alejandro realized how much he enjoyed Charles' company on these trips. They had talked about their relationship; both confirmed that their friendship had grown and deepened, yet remained free of romantic complication. He smiled thinking how they'd both expressed their relief to the other. It was what both wanted; they were comfortable as very good friends and fuck buddies.

The living room provided a comfortable spot for seated conversation. This area connected to a dining room that accommodated twelve comfortably. The condo was furnished for entertaining the friends they'd envisioned when buying the place.

The space was in a totally renovated apartment building, in an area of the city that was beginning to make a comeback. Alejandro was one of the first who'd bought-in, and was able to configure the space to his specifications. If the demographic projections about the regentrification of the area were close to accurate, he'd make a killing on the resale.

The bones of the building had great character. He'd snagged half of the penthouse floor. Situated on one of the many hills of the city, it offered a magnificent view of the Bay Area. Alejandro had blocked off half of the original 2,000 foot area he'd purchased, knowing that he'd never need that much space and that the second apartment would bring in a premium price in the future.

After a drink, he enjoyed a quick dinner. He cleaned up the kitchen, and after watching the news restlessly flipped through the channels on the TV. He debated a workout or a night of clubbing alone. Smiling ruefully, he acknowledged to himself that solitary clubbing was not a real choice and grabbed his gym clothes.