The lyrics in this part is taken from 'My heart still Beats' by Beyonce Destiny's Child, and the pairing is Bryan/Shane (big surprise...)
----------------------------- My heart still Beats
'You're holding me, and I close my eyes You're whispering, and I start to cry'
Shane felt Bryan's arms around his whimpering body. Bryan didn't seem to be able to calm him down. Even how much Shane didn't want to show his vulnerability to Bryan, just hearing his calming voice, could make him tremble.
"What's wrong, Shane?" Bryan asked again. Shane just didn't want to let go. He just felt so safe with him, and the way Bryan held him, just made him feel so good...
'You feel so good, you're so beautiful For as long as you live, don't let me go'
Finally Shane let go off Bryan, and went to the bed. He sat down, and Bryan followed and sat down beside him. Shane just stared in the air, trying to find the right words to start. Bryan could see it was something that was hard for Shane to talk about, and rubbed his back. Shane looked at Bryan, and smiled vaguely, before he sighed as if he was to tell him a long and sad story.
'Just hold me, touch me, feel me As long as you love me, reach for me and need me If you could trust me, and teach me, never let go off me Because you're here for me, my heart still beats'
"Bryan, you know the word repulsive, right?" "Of course I do. What do you take me for?" "Would you ever tell a person they were repulsive?" "No! Well, unless they had done anything to me... why? Has someone called you... repulsive?" Shane shook his head. "No, not me... I said to mark he was repulsive..." "Why? It's not the thing about he coming out with Kian, is it?" "No, it's further back than that..." "When?" "Some months again, when he told me he was... gay..." "Well, I guess you were shocked..." "He told me he was in love with me, Bryan," Shane said, looking at Bryan with eyes full of tears. "Well, what could one expect, Shane? You were shocked, not only did a friend that you had known since you were kids tell you he was gay, he also told you that he had feelings for you. You were confused, and the word just popped into your head, and you called him repulsive. Is that so strange?" "I'm in love with him too..." Bryan's eyes widened. "What?" Shane tried to swallow the limp that was growing in his throat, and making it hard for him to talk. "I was just so blown of by what he told me, cause I loved him too, and I didn't really want to accept it... I don't know why... it just slipped out of me, I guess, and I said a lot of things that night, that I really regret now..." Bryan patted his back. "Is that why you're always avoiding them, Mark and Kian? Cause you want to be in Kian's place." Shane nodded, and looked at Bryan, looking into those blue-grey eyes, that now were somehow more grey, as if some of the joy that usually was there, was somehow gone...
'Looking in the eyes, the eyes of love And I hold your face, and I see the sun'
"Well, it seems like Mark's not leaving Kian, and Kian doesn't seem to want to let Mark go with the first... you know they've both had rough times finding true love, and you can't just tell Mark you're sorry, and expect everything to go your way. You know better than that!"
"Of course I do, Bryan! I want the best for the both of them, believe me, but it doesn't help, when I also want Mark to myself! I don't want to ruin anything for them, even if it stands in front of my own happiness! I just feel so destroyed and abandoned, so lonely..."
Bryan looked at Shane, and laid a hand on his head. "You're not alone, or abandoned, and you're sure as hell not destroyed! You screwed up this time Shane, but listen to yourself; you say you're happy for them, and would never want to destroy for them! That's a good thing to say, and you should be happy to be able to say that!"
"I am, but I still feel... I know I'm not alone, Bryan; I never am as long as you guys are always around, but I still feel lonely."
"Alone and lonely is the same thing..."
"No, it's not, Bryan!"
"Ok, so you're lonely, Shane. Why don't you do anything about it? We're here for you, Shane, and you don't haft to feel lonely as long as we're here..."
Shane looked at Bryan. What he was saying was right, but he just didn't know what to do. "What can I do about it, Bryan? You're here, but I still feel lonely and unloved..."
"Yeah, what can you do? What can you do to feel loved?"
Shane just looked at Bryan. He seemed to be so serious. Shane rarely saw him like this, so serious, so caught up in something. The only times would probably be when he was so caught up in writing or even just looked over a song, but only then... not just in some conversation. Then Shane realized, this wasn't just a conversation...
Shane leaned towards him...
'And I taste your kiss, and you touch my soul And I'm feeling things, I've never felt before'
Bryan was surprised at Shane's actions, but didn't struggle as their lips brushed together, and their tongues met together in a surge of magic electricity.
Shane moved into Bryan's lap, straddling him, and moved his hands up Bryan's neck to the back of his head, entangling his fingers in his hair, while Bryan's hands moved to Shane's back.
'Just hold me, touch me, feel me As long as you love me, reach for me and need me If you could trust me, and teach me, never let go off me Because you're here for me, my heart still beats'
Shane pushed Bryan down to the bed, and his hands wandered down Bryan's body. One part of him told him to stop before someone could get really hurt; the only problem was he wanted more...
Shane rose up from Bryan, and his hands went down to the jumper. Bryan leaned up to him, as Shane pulled it off. Bryan lay back down again, while Shane pulled of his own jumper, throwing it to the floor, and leaned down to him again.
A moan escaped from Bryan's mouth as Shane twitched a nipple, while sucking and nibbling the other. The other hand continued down Bryan's body, down to the jeans. He unbuttoned it as he caressed the nipples with his fingers. He had unbuttoned all of the buttons, and his hand went inside the boxers, finding Bryan's cock (which wasn't too hard... to find...) and freed him out in the open. After removing the rest of his clothes, Shane changed position, so he was sitting the other way, and Bryan could only see his back. He pulled the jeans and the boxers off, so Bryan was completely naked. Shane took a hand around Bryan's cock and firmly stroke it up and down. Bryan moaned, enjoying Shane's touch. He stroke a finger down Shane's back, and Shane shuddered a bit, feeling it in his shoulder and down his back. Shane leaned down, and took Bryan's cock in his mouth, while exposing his ass to Bryan. Bryan squirmed a bit as he felt Shane's tongue working on his cock. He took a deep breath, and stroke his finger further down Shane's back. He took his fingers to his mouth, and sucked them before he took them to the crack. Shane wriggled as he felt Bryan's finger entering him. Bryan entered another finger as he reached his other hand around and found Shane's cock, and Shane moved his hips to Bryan's movements. Bryan hit the prostate, and it made Shane rock his hips. Bryan tried again, and once again Shane rocked his hips. Shane had never felt something that intensely, and found it hard to concentrate on what he was doing, as Bryan kept on nudging inside of him. Bryan, though, felt that he was coming closer to the edge, and felt his whole body knotting together, and could tell that Shane was also coming soon, as he felt him tightening around his fingers. Bryan thrust his cock into Shane's mouth and felt the warm cum from Shane in his hand.
'I'm feeling, what they confuse love I never knew feelings like this Could exist inside of me I'm soaring, emotions exploding I don't want to live another day If you're not here with me'
Shane panted and crawled of Bryan. Bryan looked at him lying on his back, looking up in the ceiling, and closing his eyes. He already regretted what he had done. It felt like he had been using Shane's confusion. He wasn't sure what Shane thought about what had happened, but felt that Shane maybe wanted to be alone, so he rose up and gathered his clothes. Shane leaned up on his elbows, and looked at him. "What are you doing?" he asked.
"I guess I should leave..." "Why?" Bryan didn't answer. 'Yeah, why?' he asked himself. "I want you here..." Shane said with pleading eyes, as he didn't want to be alone, again.
Bryan stood there, and looked at Shane. He understood that this wasn't the right time to leave Shane alone, as he could see that he was still a bit shook up. And he did wanted to stay with him...
Bryan lay back down in the bed, and wrapped his arms around him.
'Just hold me, touch me, feel me As long as you love me, reach for me, and need me If you could trust me, and teach me, never let go off me Because you're here for me, my heart still beats'
(c) Zelda 2001