WARNING: This story may contain descriptions of sexual acts between boys. If this bothers you or isn't legal where you live kindly leave now. The story and the people in it are fictional and any resemblance to people, living or otherwise, is purely coincidental. This work is the property of the author.
Chapter 2 - Love Springs Anew Lovell Winn
I gently placed the saddle on the horse's back, adjusted the saddle straps and made my way to his head. He nickered softly and I gave him a pat on his soft neck I slipped the snaffle bit into his mouth and eased the bridle onto his head. I made the necessary adjustments to the straps quickly having done this so many times before. I knew my horse well I gave him another pat and he nickered in response I swung up into the saddle with ease and adjusted the stirrups. I rode out of the barn and headed for the lake at the back of the farm. I had decided to name him Fagin, an odd name for a horse but it seemed to suit him. Slowly we picked our way down the trail and I gave him free rein of his head as I listened to the birds calling on this quiet spring day.
My thoughts started to stray back to a few months earlier and I sighed heavily. Fagin's ears swiveled back towards me I spoke reassuringly to him that all was well and I just missed Ryan. Ryan. My boyfriend's name still brought a tear to my eyes and an empty, longing ache to my heart. It had been months since his death and I had become somewhat quiet shortly after. My friends had noticed of course and did all they could to bring me around. They stuck by me and I was grateful for their friendship. Now as I made my way to the lake on Fagin's back I found myself longing for a new companion I missed being held and loved by someone. I had been to see a grief counsellor. My mum had been able to find a gay counsellor for me. He had assured me it was a natural occurence and that I should not feel guilty for looking around and that Ryan would want me to continue to live and maybe even find someone else one day. I had even gone onto a few gay message boards and posted there and heard pretty much the same thing. I had even been brave enough to email with a few people who had also lost loved ones and had gotten some more support that way. Life moved on slowly, oh so very slowly--but life moved on. My mum was the best, she let me take my time mourning Ryan. I talked to Fagin as i always did on our rides together, as I had since I took up riding again after Ryan's death. The solitude gave me time to heal and the companionship of Fagin and the feel of his body beneath mine seemed to give me some measure of comfort and a bit of thrill to my groin as well. when I had told the counsellor that he didnt seem too surprised. He was 15 once i suppose as well.
I thought of Ryan and how he had died and tears sprang to my eyes and I let them fall unchecked. My mind wandered back to the day I had finally been able to read the story in the paper. "Young teen killed by gang swarming" the headline had read and below it the story of how they had gone after him because he was gay and had loved me. Someone had found out about us. So much guilt overwhelmed me that sucked in my breath and Fagin stopped I slowed my breath and calmed my emotions. I urged Fagin forward and patted his neck to assure him all was well again.
Fagin whinnied and I thought I heard a whinny in response. Probably my imagination. I drew in the reins as we neared the lake. There were alot of stones and I didn't want him to pick one up in his shoes. As we turned the bend to the lake I heard splashing and the unmistakable giggle of another boy. My heart raced at the sound of it. Drat! There went my time of solitude. Oh well, I nudged Fagin forward and then quietly slipped from his back and led him to the water. What a sight met my eyes! a brown tousel-haired, green eyed beauty was paddling around in the lake, thoroughly enjoying himself. Picketed nearby was a roan pony and this young man was holding a conversation with him much the way I spoke to Fagin, like he was his best friend. I remembered to breathe and took some steps forward and led Fagin further into the water to let him cool off his legs and removed his saddle. By this time the boy had seen me and made his way over. I couldn't help but admire his tan and I wondered if he was tanned as well all overI admired the way his very outdoorsy body moved and i licked my lips nervously and felt an old familiar stirring in my groin and willed my body to be still...which of course it didnt.
"Hi I'm Jeremy and that is Myxis" he said indicating the roan pony off to the side. I looked at him, smiled and shook the offered hand, feeling an electricity. such a long time since I'd felt that. "I'm Lovell and this is Fagin" I replied patting his neck. Jeremy offered his hand for Fagin to sniff and then patted his neck. I admired how well he handled himself around Fagin. We made our way over to Myxis and I picketed Fagin nearby. I went to Myxis, offered my hand and patted his neck and soon the two ponies were getting to know each other. I could feel Jeremy watching me while Jeremy and I made our way to the water. I stripped down to my swim trunks and made my way slowly into the cool water gasping as it hit my groin. Jeremy splashed me and got me wet. In no time at all we were playing and having fun like we'd been friends forever. I watched him closely and wondered if he was gay. I didnt dare ask him. We horsed around a bit till we got tired then laid out on the beach.
A couple of times I looked over and saw Jeremy watching me with a far off look on his face. I finally propped myself up on my elbow and looked at him.
"What are you thinking? it must be something serious, you've got a really deep look of concentration on your face."
Jeremy sat up and a deep blush crept over his cheeks. he looked out over the lake and then turned to look at me.
"Is it true you're gay? that you like boys?"
"Where'd you hear that from?" I asked, knowing full well the answer...everyone knew I was....I'd come out recently. I sighed heavily and looked at him. "Yes it's true. It's who I am, I'm gay."
I looked over at him and the blush had gotten deeper in shade. Jeremy had edged closer to me and laid his hand on mine.
"I heard you lost someone recently too, you're boyfriend I guess you'd call it too?" He looked at me questioningly. Geeze, word sure got around fast. I sighed heavily and wrapped my arms around my knees.
"Yes, my boyfriend, my lover....look, why all the questions? You curious or something like that?" My voice developed a sharp edge to it, sharper than I had intended. I immediately regretted it when I saw the hurt look on Jeremy's face. I immediately apologised to him. His face softened and he licked his lips. I wanted to taste those lips so badly. Jeremy moved closer to me and looked around to make sure we were alone. "I'm sorry you lost him. And I'm asking because I need a friend,I'm gay too and we moved here to get away from kids razzing me". Oh wow! I couldn't believe it! My heart beat faster. Life was going to be good again. I had a new friend.
Jeremy and I swam and relaxed for the rest of the afternoon and went for a ride and soon parted company agreeing to meet the next day. I brushed Fagin down in the barn, fed him and cleaned up the tack and walked into the kitchen whistling. Mum smiled at me and commented how much happier I looked. I told her I had made a new friend and told her a bit about Jeremy. She looked at me concernedly and told me to be careful, kissed me on the cheek and told me to wash up for dinner. I raced to the shower whistling, happier than I had been in a while. __________________________________________________________________________
If you have any comments please email me at lovell_winn@hotmail.com, flames will be ignored. I would like to thank teller_of_tales for his help proof reading the story. I would like to thank my love for his giving me the joy and hope to continue on living . To my friends for their continued friendship and support much thanks. lw